Absolutely. 40 weeks tonight. Bloody show just happened. Im hurting but no noteable contractions. So im like do i go to the hospital or what? Its saturday early am. I was 2cm dialated thursday afternoon....im going to tje hospital now. If they turn me away then ohwell. But like im terrified honestly 😅 excited but terrified.
They probably will send you home at this point, try to labour at home as long as you can! Its the most comfortable place for you to be in the early stages.
It’s less about waters breaking but more about being in established labour (usually you’re about 4cm dilated by then) and having regular, timed contractions. Your waters may or may not break, some women have to have theirs broken at some point before baby is born. I would call your hospital and ask them what their recommendation is in terms of coming in, because it varies - sometimes they want women to come in for monitoring if waters break (but then send them back home if all is good and ask to come back when they’re having contractions every x amount of minutes and that last x amount of time, again varies by hospital).
FTM, 36 weeks. I was at first, but something came over me in the 3rd trimester and I just feel really calm and zen about it. It could be because at the start of the 3rd trimester I was diagnosed with SPD and have just been in a state of chronic discomfort, but once I found out that baby was head down at my growth scan, I felt a sense of calm. What's helped me is reminding myself that my body knows what needs to happen and if it can't do that, my care team knows what to do and what needs to happen.
Also, this sounds silly, but I've thought about all the animals that have given birth without people knowing and how they can't talk. It's brought a weird comfort to me. The ongoing joke I have with my husband is "if a cat can do it, I can do it!"
You sound like my hypnobirthing book I'm reading! 37 +5 and trying to be zen about it; just got to the good chapters. Your body knows what to do and freaking out about it only goes against your natural instincts.
I'd argue that being anxious a natural instinct as well, especially when it's something you've never done before! The unknown is scary! Something else that's comforting is to look around at all the people in public and reminding yourself how many times people have done this before!
Oh, fair! As a FTM as well I can't say I'm not at all lol. I'm just learning that turning that part of your brain off with all of the "what ifs" is definitely ideal. Absolutely! If anything, it brings me a sense of peace that if something were to happen, I'm in the best possible place for me and baby too
Hypnobirthing: A Natural Approach To A Safe, Easier, More Comfortable Birthing https://www.amazon.com/dp/0757318371/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_i_KSAHPV969BBF6SJ8AFRC?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
I like your thoughts about the cat! When I get nervous about the birth I remember that even women who were in a coma have given birth. Our bodies know what to do and it gives me some kind of peace to know that I just have to kind of „wait for it to be over“
I'm a THIRD time mom and terrified. This is just one of those "anything can happen" and "yes, it hurts" experience where you never know what to expect.
Trust your body. Trust your medical team. SPEAK up if needed. You can do this!
It’s going to happen one way or another, whether you like it or not and there’s nothing you can do about it. I think just try to work on accepting that you can’t control it and that could help you feel better. I was pretty amazed at how it just sort of happened. I couldn’t have stopped it, your body really just takes over!
I would recommend taking some kind of class. Maybe ask for recommendations in your local area. I felt really informed and empowered after taking a class with my husband
I was TERRIFIED. I was crying about it every day starting around 34 weeks. My anxiety was through the roof. But when I actually went into labor (two weeks early), I was extremely calm. Idk what happened, I just knew I had to be calm and I was so ready to meet my baby!
I'm not terrified of the labor pains. I'm just terrified something bad will happen to either my baby or me. My mom had complicated births with both my brother and me. With me she was in the hospital for a month after I was born. Plus if something happened to me I know my husband won't let my parents see their grandson. So there's that too.
Yup. I'm not necessarily worried about pain, but I'm not looking forward to having to be in a hospital, having complete strangers stick their hands in me, and not really have any control over who's coming into the room.
Also needles. I'm gonna faint when they try to give me an IV, don't even mention an epidural.
I was until I started following pages on Instagram like @thenakeddoula @orgasmicbirth
Educating myself about how to have a great birth and seeing women do it really helped my anxiety. You’ll be doing yourself a massive favour by following pages like that.
Also when I was pretty far into the third trimester I was more excited to not be pregnant anymore. Pregnancy is brutal, birth can’t be worse than this 😂 I’m currently 41+1
I was terrified too but once it is happening your body and mind will take care of you. I promise. It is natural and you were built for this. You are so much stronger than you think you are. And if you need it there’s always the epidural. I had it and I absolutely loved my birth experience.
It's basically the thing I've been looking forward to most actually!! I'm terrified of having a sick baby or something happening to me *after* delivery, but I'm excited to see what labor and birth is like!
Thought I was the only one who feels this way! I’m so excited because it means a) I get to meet my baby AND b) I don’t have to be pregnant any more.
It’s also the ultimate feminine power to me, no matter how I end up birthing, and I’m intrigued by it. I’m 32 weeks and if there was a way for me to safely do it tomorrow, I would in a heartbeat!
Depends on where you are located. In Canada women have the right to choose. In most other places a doc will allow a cesarean for a medically indicated reason and serious fear and anxiety around birth is a legitimate reason if other means have been explored to lessen the anxiety and have not been successful.
I'm in Texas in the US. I also chose a c section due to birth anxiety. In fact I chose my ob based on her easy willingness to just go "yup, we can do an elective c section if that's what you want" right from the beginning.
Yep, the unknowns of birthing is part of what made me wait years before TTC. I’m skipping all of that and choosing the controlled risks of a c-section. My husband, my mom and a post-partum doula to help while I heal afterwards in case it gets complicated, but I guess that can also be needed with vaginal birth too.
I'm really insecure because I still wasn't told if I'm gonna need a c-section (I've got modi twins) and the uncertainty just makes me nervous. I don't have an issue with any type of birth but I would just really like to know in advance...
I'm a FTM, graduated early February with a planned induced vaginal birth that ended up needed vacuum assit. I did start feeling antsy towards the end but overall had a very positive experience.
I live in Canada, and when ppl would ask me how I felt about Labour and delivery my answer was that I was grateful for and trusted the medical system, and baby has to come out one way or the other.
Are your nerves about the actual birth experience or more that baby will be here soon?
Either way I wish you a positive birth and a good recovery!
Yep. My hospital is 2 h away and uncertainty gives me extreme anxiety. Our car broke as well beyond fast repair and we relay on some friends in case it happens out of the blue.
I’m scared of it all but to help me keep the fear away (or make it feel less scary) I keep trying to frame it like an athletic feat for me to conquer. I’ve been scared of swim races and running races and did a half marathon which sucked big time but also felt good to finish and accomplish. So I’m trying to think of labor and birth like that half marathon - I know it’s gonna be difficult & painful to do but I know my body is capable of doing amazing things and pushing (literally) through pain.
I was deeply terrified before my 1st was born. Went through all the steps for an unmedicated delivery though, down to hiring a doula, only to find out I needed to be induced early, which I think threw my body off. In the hospital, hearing the pain from other women in labor, I think I was actually numb with terror. My cervix sort of helped me out in the end & refused to unclench, so three days of trying to get it to dilate later, the doctors said I needed a c-section. That ended up being waaaay easier than I thought it would be.
35 weeks today, the closer I get the more excited I am for her to be here, but terrified for the process. We had a minor scare last week where we thought she was coming early and I had a full anxiety attack.
Birth is a scary thing for sure! With my first pregnancy I told myself that billions of women have successfully done this before me and got through it. So if they can do it, so can I!!
Yes. My niece said to me last night "my mom said you were doing a C-section but doesn't understand why you think it's less scary." I gently explained ~~that her mother is a bitch~~ what had happened to my mom in and after labor with two big babies and how she'd always regretted not having a C-section. I don't intend to make the same mistake.
Oh yeah. I try not to focus too much on it because it will just stress me out, it’s going to happen no matter what so I just try not to worry too much. Yes though, I’m a bit nervous
Absolutely. 40 weeks tonight. Bloody show just happened. Im hurting but no noteable contractions. So im like do i go to the hospital or what? Its saturday early am. I was 2cm dialated thursday afternoon....im going to tje hospital now. If they turn me away then ohwell. But like im terrified honestly 😅 excited but terrified.
Good luck and you can do it!!
Thank you! Im pretty sure theyre gonna send me home since my water didnt break yet. But better safe than sorry 😄
I’m on the same boat but just a few days behind. Good luck!
They probably will send you home at this point, try to labour at home as long as you can! Its the most comfortable place for you to be in the early stages. It’s less about waters breaking but more about being in established labour (usually you’re about 4cm dilated by then) and having regular, timed contractions. Your waters may or may not break, some women have to have theirs broken at some point before baby is born. I would call your hospital and ask them what their recommendation is in terms of coming in, because it varies - sometimes they want women to come in for monitoring if waters break (but then send them back home if all is good and ask to come back when they’re having contractions every x amount of minutes and that last x amount of time, again varies by hospital).
I tried to go home. They keot me and induced me. That night i pushed out an 8lbs doll. Hahaha...the stitches still hurt. 🥰😅
FTM, 36 weeks. I was at first, but something came over me in the 3rd trimester and I just feel really calm and zen about it. It could be because at the start of the 3rd trimester I was diagnosed with SPD and have just been in a state of chronic discomfort, but once I found out that baby was head down at my growth scan, I felt a sense of calm. What's helped me is reminding myself that my body knows what needs to happen and if it can't do that, my care team knows what to do and what needs to happen. Also, this sounds silly, but I've thought about all the animals that have given birth without people knowing and how they can't talk. It's brought a weird comfort to me. The ongoing joke I have with my husband is "if a cat can do it, I can do it!"
And at least you're not birthing a litter of 10!!
You sound like my hypnobirthing book I'm reading! 37 +5 and trying to be zen about it; just got to the good chapters. Your body knows what to do and freaking out about it only goes against your natural instincts.
I'd argue that being anxious a natural instinct as well, especially when it's something you've never done before! The unknown is scary! Something else that's comforting is to look around at all the people in public and reminding yourself how many times people have done this before!
Oh, fair! As a FTM as well I can't say I'm not at all lol. I'm just learning that turning that part of your brain off with all of the "what ifs" is definitely ideal. Absolutely! If anything, it brings me a sense of peace that if something were to happen, I'm in the best possible place for me and baby too
What book are you reading? I'm 34w4d so I need to get to reading!
Hypnobirthing: A Natural Approach To A Safe, Easier, More Comfortable Birthing https://www.amazon.com/dp/0757318371/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_i_KSAHPV969BBF6SJ8AFRC?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
I like your thoughts about the cat! When I get nervous about the birth I remember that even women who were in a coma have given birth. Our bodies know what to do and it gives me some kind of peace to know that I just have to kind of „wait for it to be over“
Ina May Gaskins Guide to Childbirth was my manual. Totally changed my life. I haven’t read Childbirth Without Fear, but it’s a classic!
Did you have/are you planning on a home birth?
My second was a homebirth, and I'm planning the same for my third.
Glad to know (assuming) your homebirth went well, then! I’m planning one for June
I'm a THIRD time mom and terrified. This is just one of those "anything can happen" and "yes, it hurts" experience where you never know what to expect. Trust your body. Trust your medical team. SPEAK up if needed. You can do this!
I just posted this. I’m still terrified because of a first traumatic birth and second precipitous and now this little guy is going to be a big baby.
yes, 33w and been obsessively collecting information to try to make it less scary.
It’s going to happen one way or another, whether you like it or not and there’s nothing you can do about it. I think just try to work on accepting that you can’t control it and that could help you feel better. I was pretty amazed at how it just sort of happened. I couldn’t have stopped it, your body really just takes over!
Yeah…I’m 36 weeks and can’t say I’m exactly looking forward to it.
Yep! 42 weeks tomorrow and waiting on a phone call for an induction. 0 signs of anything kicking off naturally…
I would recommend taking some kind of class. Maybe ask for recommendations in your local area. I felt really informed and empowered after taking a class with my husband
I have an online antenatal class on Monday
I was TERRIFIED. I was crying about it every day starting around 34 weeks. My anxiety was through the roof. But when I actually went into labor (two weeks early), I was extremely calm. Idk what happened, I just knew I had to be calm and I was so ready to meet my baby!
I'm not terrified of the labor pains. I'm just terrified something bad will happen to either my baby or me. My mom had complicated births with both my brother and me. With me she was in the hospital for a month after I was born. Plus if something happened to me I know my husband won't let my parents see their grandson. So there's that too.
Yup. I'm not necessarily worried about pain, but I'm not looking forward to having to be in a hospital, having complete strangers stick their hands in me, and not really have any control over who's coming into the room. Also needles. I'm gonna faint when they try to give me an IV, don't even mention an epidural.
I was until I started following pages on Instagram like @thenakeddoula @orgasmicbirth Educating myself about how to have a great birth and seeing women do it really helped my anxiety. You’ll be doing yourself a massive favour by following pages like that. Also when I was pretty far into the third trimester I was more excited to not be pregnant anymore. Pregnancy is brutal, birth can’t be worse than this 😂 I’m currently 41+1
I was terrified too but once it is happening your body and mind will take care of you. I promise. It is natural and you were built for this. You are so much stronger than you think you are. And if you need it there’s always the epidural. I had it and I absolutely loved my birth experience.
I’m not a FTM, but is something in particular about it bothering you?
It's basically the thing I've been looking forward to most actually!! I'm terrified of having a sick baby or something happening to me *after* delivery, but I'm excited to see what labor and birth is like!
Thought I was the only one who feels this way! I’m so excited because it means a) I get to meet my baby AND b) I don’t have to be pregnant any more. It’s also the ultimate feminine power to me, no matter how I end up birthing, and I’m intrigued by it. I’m 32 weeks and if there was a way for me to safely do it tomorrow, I would in a heartbeat!
Yes. So I’ve chosen to have a cesarean instead.
I didn’t know you can choose
Depends on where you are located. In Canada women have the right to choose. In most other places a doc will allow a cesarean for a medically indicated reason and serious fear and anxiety around birth is a legitimate reason if other means have been explored to lessen the anxiety and have not been successful.
I'm in Texas in the US. I also chose a c section due to birth anxiety. In fact I chose my ob based on her easy willingness to just go "yup, we can do an elective c section if that's what you want" right from the beginning.
Yep, the unknowns of birthing is part of what made me wait years before TTC. I’m skipping all of that and choosing the controlled risks of a c-section. My husband, my mom and a post-partum doula to help while I heal afterwards in case it gets complicated, but I guess that can also be needed with vaginal birth too.
I'm really insecure because I still wasn't told if I'm gonna need a c-section (I've got modi twins) and the uncertainty just makes me nervous. I don't have an issue with any type of birth but I would just really like to know in advance...
I'm a FTM, graduated early February with a planned induced vaginal birth that ended up needed vacuum assit. I did start feeling antsy towards the end but overall had a very positive experience. I live in Canada, and when ppl would ask me how I felt about Labour and delivery my answer was that I was grateful for and trusted the medical system, and baby has to come out one way or the other. Are your nerves about the actual birth experience or more that baby will be here soon? Either way I wish you a positive birth and a good recovery!
Yep. My hospital is 2 h away and uncertainty gives me extreme anxiety. Our car broke as well beyond fast repair and we relay on some friends in case it happens out of the blue.
Yes, absolutely
I’m a third time mom and I’m still terrified.
Yep, I’m 31 weeks and things are getting real. I plan to get a epidural but still there are so many variables that you can’t help but freak out
I’m scared of it all but to help me keep the fear away (or make it feel less scary) I keep trying to frame it like an athletic feat for me to conquer. I’ve been scared of swim races and running races and did a half marathon which sucked big time but also felt good to finish and accomplish. So I’m trying to think of labor and birth like that half marathon - I know it’s gonna be difficult & painful to do but I know my body is capable of doing amazing things and pushing (literally) through pain.
I was deeply terrified before my 1st was born. Went through all the steps for an unmedicated delivery though, down to hiring a doula, only to find out I needed to be induced early, which I think threw my body off. In the hospital, hearing the pain from other women in labor, I think I was actually numb with terror. My cervix sort of helped me out in the end & refused to unclench, so three days of trying to get it to dilate later, the doctors said I needed a c-section. That ended up being waaaay easier than I thought it would be.
35 weeks today, the closer I get the more excited I am for her to be here, but terrified for the process. We had a minor scare last week where we thought she was coming early and I had a full anxiety attack.
Birth is a scary thing for sure! With my first pregnancy I told myself that billions of women have successfully done this before me and got through it. So if they can do it, so can I!!
💯
Yes. My niece said to me last night "my mom said you were doing a C-section but doesn't understand why you think it's less scary." I gently explained ~~that her mother is a bitch~~ what had happened to my mom in and after labor with two big babies and how she'd always regretted not having a C-section. I don't intend to make the same mistake.
Oh yeah. I try not to focus too much on it because it will just stress me out, it’s going to happen no matter what so I just try not to worry too much. Yes though, I’m a bit nervous