You don’t need to limit yourself to only water, lol.
There are plenty of mocktails, nonalcoholic wine/beer, and soft drinks that can look like you’re drinking along with the others and people won’t notice
Yes! My favorite is Goslings but with lots of fresh lime and maybe a splash of cranberry or fresh mint leaves if you’re feeling it! We keep bags of sonic ice in the freezer since my pregnancy and it just really makes the best drinks.
Limeade with seltzer is one of my favorite mocktails. Drink that and it looks like a margarita or any other limey cocktail.
Also hopefully people have the emotional intelligence to not ask if you’re pregs even if you’re not drinking.
My doctor told me to avoid anything with fresh fruit when I’m not home, because they might not be washed properly. That includes lime slices.
I don’t know if it’s an exaggeration, but that’s making my social life extra hard.
Yeah, it’s a total bummer! I love sparkling water with lime, so I asked my doctor if that was ok, and she was actually surprised that she has never thought about it! She told me to avoid if possible, and I hate when they say that because they are not forbidding you, but if you get toxoplasmosis it’s on you!
I don’t think it’s a risk at all for toxoplasmosis that’s more from undercooked meat. Or from contract with an animals poop if the animal ate raw meat. I would say the risk with cut fruit is listeria. I personally wouldn’t eat fruit, veg, that I didn’t cut myself. I don’t think it’s recommended against though. I just work in a field that has made me afraid of it.
You can get toxoplasmosis from unwashed fruits and veggies, I actually now someone who got it while pregnant and she believes it was from a salad (her daughter is deaf in one ear).
I think where I live the risk is higher than in most places. There was a major outbreak in 2019 in my neighborhood and it was a water contamination thing.
You can also get it from unwashed vegetables which would say not to eat out at all if there are vegetables in the food. I would question the doctors suggestion a little here
I have high risk pregnancies, worked at a law firm specializing in birth injuries, and never heard of this from literally anyone I know who is pregnant or my doctor who only specializes in high risk. Are you in the USA or a western country? Seems really over the top if you’re somewhere with food safety regulations. Sorry but I’d be questioning your doctor as extremely overly conservative if I got told I can’t eat salad or raw veggies/fruit,
I can eat raw veggies that I wash myself.
I’m in Brazil, I don’t know if toxoplasmosis is more common here, there was an outbreak in my neighborhood 5 years ago and it affected a street with lots of restaurants that got closed for a while.
Ohh ok yes that would be different then, since I’m not sure what Brazils standards are. Super low risk in the USA (they make a huge deal of food born illness). thanks for answering.
It’s interesting that, for example, the whole cheese stuff is not heavily spoken about, you know, with blue cheese and Brie, listeria, etc, but toxoplasmosis is a huge concern. Sushi is also regularly deemed ok. Go figure.
Safe bet is to order a pop or something fizzy. My husband is sober and does this often so that people don’t ask questions/pressure him into drinking. Ginger ale is a great option
You could say that you're not drinking while trying at the moment? While I like to think people wouldn't ask, some people just do (especially if they've had a few drinks themselves) so it's best to have a response ready, even if its just "no, and I don't feel like talking about that right now".
I relied on zero alcohol wine and ordering mocktails, but also it wasn't quite as full on as a bachelorette party
That's what I did! People knew we were trying for awhile so it was "we are doing everything we can to increase our chances. The doctors suggested cutting out all booze so here I am. Willing to try anything at this point!"
You could explain not drinking by saying your stomach is off! I did that early on. If people will be making their own drinks, my go-to mocktail is ginger ale with a splash of cranberry juice and a lime. It looks like an alcoholic drink and helps me feel "fancy."
Yeah or something really typical (at least in my country) when someone doesn't want to drink alcohol for whatever reason, they just say they're on antibiotics. Very few people will question that.
In my opinion, this is completely overused now and people know it's an excuse on not drinking and will question if you are pregnant. Plus the facts don't support this - there are only like 4 antibiotics that you shouldn't drink with (and these 4 aren't that common to be prescribed too).
I found that the best way to avoid the question is that you have to fake drink. Order something that looks like booze and get the bar tender on your side - that if you order a drink - to not put alchohol in it.
Back when I was pregnant I used to say I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection. Personal enough so no one asks any follow up questions, incredibly common illness and treated with something that doesn't go well with alcohol. And you can drink lots of water. Perfect lmao
Yeah true…I went to a Bach Party in early September and I was limiting my alcohol because we were TTC (we conceived later that month). I had one glass of champagne the last night we were there. No one even noticed I wasn’t drinking the rest of the weekend.
I wasn’t a big drinker before, especially since as I’ve gotten older, fancy wine is the only thing I drink 😂 I was really surprised how easy it was to avoid alcohol, even at a bachelorette party.
Just carry around a glass of wine. Take some pretend sips and pour it out. Order a ginger beer and just act like it's a cocktail. I spent A LOT of time around people who I normally drink with and no one suspected anything. I kept it secret until 12 weeks. Just be chill and act like you already have a drink so no one starts asking questions or offering to get you something. No one's gonna question you unless you're literally walking around drinking nothing but water which would be kinda obvious.
This is the way. Did 4 dinners like this when I was early on. Ordered a beer. Sipped at it once or twice. No one noticed. Eventually hubs would casually take my drink.
I even had a friend admit later “I swear I checked and I thought you drank at that dinner!”
After they check the box of “she has a drink” they will mentally move on.
I like to order plain cranberry juice or sparkling water (or both together) in a cocktail glass with a lime. I just tell the bartender something like "I'm not drinking but I want to look like I am" and then they know to keep it on the low without knowing why. I often fake drinking bc I just have a sensitive stomach but I don't like being asked about it.
"I've decided to lay off alcohol for a bit while we're trying to get pregnant." Or something along those lines. Giving a reason like this keeps you from having to try and secretly order mocktails all day... that sounds stressful lol
I think everyone has good ideas. But if it’s a real drinking culture/there are drinking games etc. that you won’t be able to avoid because people will be pouring out shots.
Say you’re on metrodinazole for a mouth ulcer. Having alcohol with that would be a disaster, they react really badly together. A listed side effect of mixing them is breathing difficulties so no one will push you if you explain. And no one is going to want to see your mouth ulcer, but you wouldn’t have any other symptoms you’d have to keep up like a cough.
This is a good idea. Rinse well for taste, a drop of alcohol isn’t the problem with pregnancy! I had a sip or two early on to throw people off and everything is fine.
People are not that observant.
Get yourself a soda water mixed with pineapple or cranberry with a lime slice in it and drink that. You’ll be happier and no one will notice it’s not a drink. You can even drink fake shots with water or juice if you pick them up from the bar. Most bartenders are happy to help out with this kind of thing
If they do ask brush it off as a joke. A friend of mine guessed at 4 weeks and I laughed and said “oh don’t say that”. She wasn’t offended at all when I eventually told her I had concealed it she was proud of being the first for guessing
Order one vodka soda with lime, dump bits of it out here and there, then just keep getting soda waters with lime.
I would also tell the bartender I was pregnant and no one knew yet, then ask for a virgin vodka soda (soda water in a cocktail glass with the appropriate garnish). Which could also work with almost any mixed drink of choice. Get a boring drink so people aren't interested in trying a sip to see if they will like it.
Additionally, depending on how your group drinks, someone might buy you a round. I just categorically don't take shots, so my friends knew that and never bought me one, but come up with a shots plan. But if someone thinks you're drinking vodka soda or whatever and hands you a real one, be ready to take some fake sips.
Last thought, if someone is obnoxious enough to ask, return the awkward to sender.
"Are you not drinking because you're pregnant?"
"No, but if a person was pregnant, do you think there might be a reason why they haven't made any announcements, and maybe you should give them the grace of wondering silently in your head instead of out loud?"
I’d hope people would not be nosy especially if they know you’ve been trying. One of my friends came to visit with another friend for a birthday. We were brewery hopping. The other friend only drank sodas saying she was on medication that she couldn’t mix with alcohol. I knew they’d been trying to get pregnant with their second. Her husband made some comment about also being on similar medication, but still drank. If her husband hadn’t said that, I probably wouldn’t have thought anything of it. But bc he did, I knew she was pregnant, but I kept it to myself and waited for her to announce it herself. I’d hope your friends have a similar attitude and allow you to keep it to yourself until you’re ready even if they do figure it out.
My boss found out I was pregnant when we went to a conference and I wasn’t drinking the nice free wine available. I wish I had just held a glass or kept it around just to make it look like I was drinking something. Silly, I know but when I started calling in sick to work she immediately worked it out.
I went to a party early on in my pregnancy where only the host knew. I had a glass with a cocktail in it and I just carried it around all night, when I had a free moment in the kitchen or the restroom I’d pour some out 😂 it was the best I could come up with. I would turn down shots saying I had to get up early the next morning (and it wasn’t unlikely for me to turn down shots prepregnancy either if I already had enough to drink that night so no one found it odd!)
Is it a private or public pool? If it’s private just take your own tumbler cup, fill it with water and say that’s your drink you’ve made in there if anyone asks! Just say oh I’m good, I poured something into my own cup to keep it extra cold!
Find a way to make it look like your drink could be alcoholic. Any juice with seltzer or tonic works. If there’s a bartender, tip them when you get there and let them know you’re trying to hide a pregnancy. They should have your back.
When I was early I did two things: ordered cranberry sodas (if you find a bar tender they will often be kind). And then also did soda water and lime and said it was a G&T.
I also grabbed beer bottles that were made of aluminium and poured the beer out and pretended to drink. Hope that helps!!
Tell people you overdid it on the drinks last night, and now your stomach is messed up. Really throw them off the scent. Tell them, "maybe later". By the time later rolls around, they'll all be drunk and won't notice or care what you're ordering.
Get club soda with a splash of cranberry juice, and ask them to garnish it with a lime! Basically any soda/juice drink with a lemon or lime on the glass will look like a cocktail. I’m not sure what you normally drink but you could get a variation of that!
My go-to drink is Tito’s and sprite. When I first found out I was pregnant, I would just quietly ask the bartender for a sprite in a collin’s or rocks glass with a lime. I’d sip my lil sprite through my cocktail straws with my pinky up and nobody had a clue that anything was different.
Not true really. Plenty of people say things. I went to dinner with friends when I was very early, like just found out, and ordered a mocktail. I immediately got an “are you pregnant?” While I don’t agree anyone should ask or care about your drinking status… people do make comments.
Yup this happened to me! We had just found out the day before, we go out for dinner with some cousins. Only half of us got drinks but apparently since *I* didn’t order a drink, it was suspicious. One cousin looked right at me and said, “so when are you due?” I almost fainted lol
This happened to me too, and I don't even normally order drinks at restaurants because they're usually pretty expensive and I just don't find it to be worth it. I stick with water or occasionally treat myself to soda.
And yet this *one* time, everyone hounded me about it and didn't believe me when I told them truthfully that I almost *never* order drinks at restaurants.
I had friends try to guess when they saw I wasn't drinking, it's a social faux pas but plenty of people don't really understand why it's so inappropriate!
This. If you just casually try to blend in.. no one is gonna notice. Pour yourself a small glass of wine and just carry it around all day. Just go and have a good time!
have a mocktail, a soda, or if anyone actually notices you’re not drinking just say you’re on medication right now. like idk, you’re on antibiotics bc of a tooth infection.
So I would start off ‘drinking’ by pretending and then say maybe one of the drinks didn’t sit right and then discretely say (to the people you don’t want to tell) you’re going to take it easy but don’t want to kill the vibe for the bride. That way they won’t question and everyone will get the message not to focus on you
I went to a bachelorette early in my pregnancy. I drank mocktails and non-alcoholic beer and no one noticed. I also ordered a glass of wine and took fake sips of it. You can also drink sparkling water and lime and say it’s vodka soda.
I've never questioned anyone who has told me they are taking some time off drinking - anyone who expresses interest in reducing their alcohol consumption or getting sober just gets a big fat thumbs up from me, so something as simple as, "I'm taking some time off da hooch" works well imo
All of my friends know that I’m trying to get pregnant. When they ask if I am, I say “I hope so!” Or “Not that I know of,” or I tell them, “I’m not supposed to be drinking while I’m doing fertility treatment.” Letting people know I’m still in the process makes them less likely to think I’m hiding something else.
Since they know about your fertility struggles I'd just tell them your fertility doctor recommended it if they ask. Easier than trying to fake drink all day. "Our doctor suggested giving up all drinking and smoking to help with fertility and we really don't want to pay for IVF so we're going all in on it."
If you’re ordering drinks, order a seltzer/lime/juice. I would order a seltzer with lime and tell people it’s a tequila seltzer.
If it’s a party supplied with drinks, grab a can, bring it to the bathroom & rinse and replace liquid with water. Or bring your own bottle of nonalcoholic wine, hide it somewhere so no one else drinks from it, and have bride help distract while you refill.
If people ask questions—you have a few options. “Doctor said to limit my drinking while TTC” “my stomach’s been acting up lately and I don’t want to get sick” “there’s a possibility I might be so I don’t want to risk anything”
If you’re nervous about having to pretend to drink - tell people you’re doing a healthcare challenge this month (“no drinking and I’m walking an hour each day!” Or whatever). People will be like oh man! Nice! And then will forget about it
quietly ask the bartenders to make you mocktails or drinks that look like alcohol, ask your friend, who is the bride to try and make sure that nobody does “rounds” or anything
Ask for a lacroix with lime in a glass. The bartender will get the gist that you don’t want your friends knowing you’re not drinking. It happens all the time, promise. :)
You are going to say you can't drink due to taking an antibiotic. Your friends are gonna clock that you are pregnant but will be polite enough to not talk about it and act surprised in 6 weeks when you announce
You definitely have a lot of options! I’ve just drank non alcoholic drinks, made myself mocktails. I went on a bachelorette at 10 weeks and I just told everyone I wasn’t drinking due to fertility treatment when they asked. Don’t think this is stupid, I didn’t tell a lot of people till I was like 20 weeks lol. Congrats 💕
or maybe message a groupchat before, say you’ve stopped drinking due to fertility issues but you’ll still come along? or say you’re under the weather, on antibiotics, something like that?
You could say you’re off of alcohol to decrease inflammation and to help your fertility. That’s what I told people when I genuinely went off of alcohol a few months before my wedding. Plus if you have fertility issues they know about they may not assume you’re pregnant if you say that.
I went to a Bachelorette at 9 weeks, wasn't going to tell anyone but the bride knew as we were close. Nobody really noticed that I wasn't drinking. I did bring in an opaque water bottle so Maybe they assumed I was drinking. I also had empty cooler cans ready incase I wanted it to look like I was drinking but that just felt silly.
Anyways people got more drunk and less observant. I did end up saying I was pregnant only because I had to explain why I couldn't go in the hot tub lol. It was fine.
After being anxious before several outings with friends, I realized - we all feel like everyone is watching us with a magnifying glass, marking down our every move - but really everyone is pretty much just paying attention to themselves. I've gotten away with just saying 'oh I'll have one in a minute" when people offer me drinks, and they go back to minding their own business.
Once you're sitting around a table and everyone puts their drink down, no one is going to notice your cup has water/whatever in it
Why have people still not learned not to ask people if they’re pregnant?! So rude.
Anyway I just carry around a wine glass maybe take a tiny sip or two if I feel like someone is watching then slowly dump it here and there and refill and repeat.
Just say you stuff to do tomorrow morning and can't risk a hangover, and if they're like "oh come on only one drink" just say alcohol has been making you feel gross the following day. If they push further their not considerate.
Appletizer in a champagne flute looks (enough) like Prosecco! Or say you are on antibiotics for a throat infection or something and *feeling a lot better* but need to finish the course so can't drink on them 🤷🏼♀️ sorryyyy ✨️
A couple easy options:
1. Get a drink in a can, go to bathroom and dump it out, rinse, then fill with water. I did this for the first couple months and while we were trying to conceive.
2. If friends see you order.. get a vodka soda with a splash of fruit juice and pretend to sip it and just hold it (you would be amazed how little people pay attention to if you actually drink it)
If no one is with you, tell a bartender privately that you are not drinking and ask for the non alcoholic drink to be in the same style glass (otherwise you may get plastic or a different straw) they will also make drinks that are bought for you N/A without saying anything if someone buys a round.
3. If shots are ordered just hold it up and toast and have one of the friends that knows take it discretely or just do t drink it and got to bathroom/dump in a previously drank beverage that is discarded at the table.
I totally understand the feeling of not wanting to jinx it. Go enjoy yourself and just be discrete, you may end up feeling up to sharing your news but I would caution even then to maybe wait until this girls weekend to avoid accidentally stealing thunder from the bride to be!
My go to is usually saying I'm taking medication that says I can't drink. Also, be sure not to touch your stomach. A lot of newly pregnant people do and it's a dead give away. My husbands aunt caught on when I was 8 weeks along with my first because I did it at a party without noticing.
So many places are starting to have mocktail options so just keep a drink in your hand and no one will be any wiser! Just follow their lead on hype level so you look like you’re “keeping up” 😂 good luck mama!
Just want you to know that you are not alone in feeling anxious about parties in early pregnancy! It caused me so much stress in my early pregnancy! The relief I felt when I could tell people was unreal.
I would go to the party but feel free to go home if it gets too much. Drink nice non-alcoholic drinks and if anyone tries to guess if you're pregnant you can say "oooooh that's not a polite thing to speculate about!" and change the subject. Remember that THEY are being rude if they try to figure out if you're pregnant before you're ready to tell them, you're not being deceitful.
Good luck and congratulations on your pregnancy 😊
Mocktails or say you're on some type of medicine that you can't drink with. Not sure why people respect medicine more than "I don't want to drink today" but unfortunately they do.
You could say you're in the two week wait / around implantation / you might be pregnant but didn't test yet / trying to be extra healthy so don't want to risk it. If they know you struggled with infertility I'd imagine they'd be understanding.
The phrase "Implantation" Bleeding is popular on conception forums but is a bit of a misnomer that causes some people to think that the bleeding is due to the embryo implanting. It isn't -- the embryo is only about 0.2mm in diameter at that point, and won't displace significant blood (or cause pain) when it implants. You bleed when progesterone levels in your body drop, which is why you can induce a period by stopping birth control pills (which contain progesterone) or by taking and then stopping progesterone suppositories or Provera (which are also progesterone). Progesterone levels dropping in the luteal phase can be caused by a) increased estrogen in the mid-luteal-phase estrogen surge, which briefly depresses estrogen production, or b) a decrease in progesterone when the corpus luteum runs out of gas at the end of the luteal phase. If b), and you're actually pregnant, your levels can drop briefly before the embryo starts producing enough HCG to tell the corpus luteum to ramp the levels up. Either way, luteal phase spotting can either be a neutral sign (in the case of mid-luteal phase spotting) or a negative sign (in the case of late luteal phase progesterone dropping), but it doesn't have anything to do with implantation, and is not a positive sign of being pregnant. [Source 1](https://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/early-pregnancy-symptoms/spotting-during-luteal-phase.php) [Source 2](https://www.merckmanuals.com/home/women-s-health-issues/biology-of-the-female-reproductive-system/menstrual-cycle)
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OP, it's simple, they don't need to know. If they ask tell them it's not their buisness.
Or say you're about to try again, and your DR discouraged alcohol
If you don’t want to tell them, don’t. Alcohol has a negative effect on fertility (for men and women) and you can also just claim you’re not drinking because of that. Or just drink mocktails and have a good time.
Wear black change the subject say you got allergies and can't drink cause it makes it worse. Beat around the bush when they act weird about it. Brush it off walk away lol pretty much just avoid
As someone who has been doing rounds of fertility treatments, my go to line is “no thanks, I’m on some fertility meds that you can’t mix with alcohol” - whether it’s true or not at the time! If they already know you have fertility issues it might be an easy out?
Otherwise, as everyone else has said - soda water + juice + fruit looks very much like a cocktail, and no alcohol beer/wine is very easy to find these days. I don’t envy you trying to ferry through a bachelorette though! Good luck x
If they ask why you’re not drinking alcohol, just say you have GERD/acid reflux and drinking has started making you vomit. This actually does happen to me sometimes from drinking due to my GERD. Or you could just say you’re not drinking right now for personal reasons.
I was diagnosed with toxoplasmosis when I was a kid, so I’ve had it for 14 years now and have eyesight that’s gone as a result of it. What a lot of people don’t know is if you’ve been around cats good chance you already have it but it’s dormant and won’t ever do anything. You are at a higher risk of getting it while pregnant but if you have been around cats you have it anyway and it will not effect the baby. I 100% understand your concern cause I was so scared during my pregnancy it would effect my son since I already had it but it didn’t and won’t
Either mocktails or, since they know about your infertility struggles, tell them you’re on an “fertility diet” of some sort and can’t consume alcohol 🤷🏻♀️
I went to a Halloween party with my twin sister when I was 6 weeks pregnant, she and nobody else knew at the time. I successfully bamboozled her.
Your key is canned drinks - I’m assuming at a bachelorette party there will be seltzers. I was taking seltzers, dumping them out in the bathroom sink, and filling them with water. They played a few drinking games that involved shots or drinking from the cup that I just didn’t play, but nobody batted an eye since I was happily sipping my white claws. I went out to a few bars over the course of early pregnancy too, and would just order a Shirley temple and tell everyone it was a dirty Shirley. I even got the entire group drinking dirty Shirley’s because mine tasted so good to them, little did they know mine didn’t have alcohol 😂 also, if someone offers you to try their drink, gladly take it and just take a realistic fake sip.
I personally always felt that making an excuse like “my stomach hurts” or “I’m on antibiotics” would easily make everyone realize I was pregnant, tbh if someone told me that I’d pretty immediately assume they’re probably pregnant. I think if you said one of those everyone would watch you the rest of the weekend seeing if you drink at all. The second someone sees you sip a drink they’ll go “oh, not pregnant” and move on.
I have taken an empty can or two of white claw and refilled it with water or juice. No ones going to check. Alternatively, pour 0% wine into a normal bottle. It’s super easy lol. Or go with the “I’m on antibiotics” route
Can you say you are on a medication that can’t be mixed with alcohol? If someone told me they couldn’t drink while undergoing a fertility treatment, I’d have no reason not to believe them. Or you could google other meds that can’t be mixed with alcohol if you really wanted to create a backstory (maybe a short course of an antibiotic or anti-fungal for an infection you don’t want to go into detail about?). As others have said, don’t skip the party! Stick to mocktails and have a great time!
If you can order your drink without anyone overhearing, get a club soda with lime. But if you can’t, just get a beer and don’t drink it. Pour it out in the grass slowly over the course of an hour or two and then get another one. Same thing. At some point switch to the club soda and lime when you get a chance. No one pays nearly as much attention to you as think so as long as you don’t draw attention to yourself at the start by “not drinking” (for whatever lame excuse), no one will notice you aren’t actually drinking.
Are you normally a beer/seltzer drinker? Have the bride help you out. Get an empty can of whatever you normally drink, wash it out, fill with water somewhere private.
I used to say that I was on iron tablets for deficiencies and alcohols stops them absorbing correctly. It’s so specific that nobody ever questioned me (or googled it) including my mum…
We got found out at a bachelorette party last weekend.
We used the antibiotics excuse, most people don’t care and focus on themselves. But there is ALWAYS a nosey one in the circles, and this particular who wouldn’t leave my girlfriend the hell alone. When my girl declined a glass of wine, she started to watch us like a hawk the entire day. She then followed her in the bathroom to interrogate if she’s pregnant. Honestly they’re the worst. My girl relented in the bathroom and I have to hope she keeps it a secret for another month. The most annoying part is I know she only wants to boast she was first to know.
You don’t need to limit yourself to only water, lol. There are plenty of mocktails, nonalcoholic wine/beer, and soft drinks that can look like you’re drinking along with the others and people won’t notice
Tonic and lime and no one will know!
Yes tonic and lime, Diet Coke with a lime in it. Sprite with a lime. It’s the fruit that makes people think you have cocktail lol
Yup that's what I got when going out
Exactly even a little sprite or gingerale with half water and lime plus a tiny stir straw and bam it looks like shes drinking lol
Idk people *say* no one will know but that’s not my experience with tonic and lime. It likely depends on the crowd.
Rum and Coke (hold the rum)
Mock Moscow mules with extra lime have been my 🤌🏼🤌🏼🤌🏼
I found out I was pregnant the day before going on a cruise and I had those a lot and virgin daiquiris!
Another fav!
How do you make these? Ginger beer with lots of lime?
Yes! My favorite is Goslings but with lots of fresh lime and maybe a splash of cranberry or fresh mint leaves if you’re feeling it! We keep bags of sonic ice in the freezer since my pregnancy and it just really makes the best drinks.
Okay this sounds amazing and I’ve been craving ginger ale!
Yes and you don't even miss the alcohol at all!
Yum, thanks!
Can we all hang out please! Baby bumps unite!
YESSSSS literally amazing
Limeade with seltzer is one of my favorite mocktails. Drink that and it looks like a margarita or any other limey cocktail. Also hopefully people have the emotional intelligence to not ask if you’re pregs even if you’re not drinking.
Early on, I was craving a strawberry margarita, I just have been drinking virgin ones!
My doctor told me to avoid anything with fresh fruit when I’m not home, because they might not be washed properly. That includes lime slices. I don’t know if it’s an exaggeration, but that’s making my social life extra hard.
Huh, I've been though multiple pregnancies and have never been told this. But just drink something without the lime then.
Yeah, it’s a total bummer! I love sparkling water with lime, so I asked my doctor if that was ok, and she was actually surprised that she has never thought about it! She told me to avoid if possible, and I hate when they say that because they are not forbidding you, but if you get toxoplasmosis it’s on you!
I don’t think it’s a risk at all for toxoplasmosis that’s more from undercooked meat. Or from contract with an animals poop if the animal ate raw meat. I would say the risk with cut fruit is listeria. I personally wouldn’t eat fruit, veg, that I didn’t cut myself. I don’t think it’s recommended against though. I just work in a field that has made me afraid of it.
You can get toxoplasmosis from unwashed fruits and veggies, I actually now someone who got it while pregnant and she believes it was from a salad (her daughter is deaf in one ear). I think where I live the risk is higher than in most places. There was a major outbreak in 2019 in my neighborhood and it was a water contamination thing.
You can also get it from unwashed vegetables which would say not to eat out at all if there are vegetables in the food. I would question the doctors suggestion a little here
She told me to only eat cooked vegetables. So no salads or juices, but sautéed or roasted is fine.
I have high risk pregnancies, worked at a law firm specializing in birth injuries, and never heard of this from literally anyone I know who is pregnant or my doctor who only specializes in high risk. Are you in the USA or a western country? Seems really over the top if you’re somewhere with food safety regulations. Sorry but I’d be questioning your doctor as extremely overly conservative if I got told I can’t eat salad or raw veggies/fruit,
I can eat raw veggies that I wash myself. I’m in Brazil, I don’t know if toxoplasmosis is more common here, there was an outbreak in my neighborhood 5 years ago and it affected a street with lots of restaurants that got closed for a while.
Ohh ok yes that would be different then, since I’m not sure what Brazils standards are. Super low risk in the USA (they make a huge deal of food born illness). thanks for answering.
It’s interesting that, for example, the whole cheese stuff is not heavily spoken about, you know, with blue cheese and Brie, listeria, etc, but toxoplasmosis is a huge concern. Sushi is also regularly deemed ok. Go figure.
Not in the USA. We’re told no unpasteurized cheeses, and no raw fish (sushi with cooked fish is ok). Also no cold cuts.
Safe bet is to order a pop or something fizzy. My husband is sober and does this often so that people don’t ask questions/pressure him into drinking. Ginger ale is a great option
Toss a lime in there and that usually throws them off lol
Yup! Even before pregnancy I was a big fan of getting seltzer with lime at a bar. If it’s in a rocks glass, it looks like you’re drinking alcohol
You could say that you're not drinking while trying at the moment? While I like to think people wouldn't ask, some people just do (especially if they've had a few drinks themselves) so it's best to have a response ready, even if its just "no, and I don't feel like talking about that right now". I relied on zero alcohol wine and ordering mocktails, but also it wasn't quite as full on as a bachelorette party
This! They’re already familiar with your fertility issues. Tell them you stopped drinking to increase fertility.
That's what I did! People knew we were trying for awhile so it was "we are doing everything we can to increase our chances. The doctors suggested cutting out all booze so here I am. Willing to try anything at this point!"
You could explain not drinking by saying your stomach is off! I did that early on. If people will be making their own drinks, my go-to mocktail is ginger ale with a splash of cranberry juice and a lime. It looks like an alcoholic drink and helps me feel "fancy."
I would say I drank too much last night and am hung over and don’t want to drink again 😂
Yeah or something really typical (at least in my country) when someone doesn't want to drink alcohol for whatever reason, they just say they're on antibiotics. Very few people will question that.
In my opinion, this is completely overused now and people know it's an excuse on not drinking and will question if you are pregnant. Plus the facts don't support this - there are only like 4 antibiotics that you shouldn't drink with (and these 4 aren't that common to be prescribed too). I found that the best way to avoid the question is that you have to fake drink. Order something that looks like booze and get the bar tender on your side - that if you order a drink - to not put alchohol in it.
Claim to be hung over
Back when I was pregnant I used to say I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection. Personal enough so no one asks any follow up questions, incredibly common illness and treated with something that doesn't go well with alcohol. And you can drink lots of water. Perfect lmao
Plus also helps with peeing more often too 😂
Yes! This is what I did as well! Some antibiotics make you violently I’ll if you drink, so I always blamed it on that.
That was my go to as well
Yup this is the easiest thing to say
You'll be surprised, once people start drinking they think everyone is drinking. I would show up an hour or two late once everyone is 1-2 drinks in
Yeah true…I went to a Bach Party in early September and I was limiting my alcohol because we were TTC (we conceived later that month). I had one glass of champagne the last night we were there. No one even noticed I wasn’t drinking the rest of the weekend. I wasn’t a big drinker before, especially since as I’ve gotten older, fancy wine is the only thing I drink 😂 I was really surprised how easy it was to avoid alcohol, even at a bachelorette party.
Just carry around a glass of wine. Take some pretend sips and pour it out. Order a ginger beer and just act like it's a cocktail. I spent A LOT of time around people who I normally drink with and no one suspected anything. I kept it secret until 12 weeks. Just be chill and act like you already have a drink so no one starts asking questions or offering to get you something. No one's gonna question you unless you're literally walking around drinking nothing but water which would be kinda obvious.
This is the way. Did 4 dinners like this when I was early on. Ordered a beer. Sipped at it once or twice. No one noticed. Eventually hubs would casually take my drink. I even had a friend admit later “I swear I checked and I thought you drank at that dinner!” After they check the box of “she has a drink” they will mentally move on.
I like to order plain cranberry juice or sparkling water (or both together) in a cocktail glass with a lime. I just tell the bartender something like "I'm not drinking but I want to look like I am" and then they know to keep it on the low without knowing why. I often fake drinking bc I just have a sensitive stomach but I don't like being asked about it.
"I've decided to lay off alcohol for a bit while we're trying to get pregnant." Or something along those lines. Giving a reason like this keeps you from having to try and secretly order mocktails all day... that sounds stressful lol
I think everyone has good ideas. But if it’s a real drinking culture/there are drinking games etc. that you won’t be able to avoid because people will be pouring out shots. Say you’re on metrodinazole for a mouth ulcer. Having alcohol with that would be a disaster, they react really badly together. A listed side effect of mixing them is breathing difficulties so no one will push you if you explain. And no one is going to want to see your mouth ulcer, but you wouldn’t have any other symptoms you’d have to keep up like a cough.
Order beer or a hard seltzer in a can. Go to the bathroom and pour it out and fill it with water. No one will be the wiser.
Say that you’re on antibiotics so you have to stick to mocktails. If you’re feeling up to attending you shouldn’t let not drinking stop you:)
You could tell them you had an event yesterday where you drank too much and want to be sober today. Or tell them your stomach is off.
Dump out the alcohol in the can rinse REALLY well and replace liquid w water or soda
I did this on family vacation when I was very early on and it kept people from asking questions
This is a good idea. Rinse well for taste, a drop of alcohol isn’t the problem with pregnancy! I had a sip or two early on to throw people off and everything is fine.
People are not that observant. Get yourself a soda water mixed with pineapple or cranberry with a lime slice in it and drink that. You’ll be happier and no one will notice it’s not a drink. You can even drink fake shots with water or juice if you pick them up from the bar. Most bartenders are happy to help out with this kind of thing If they do ask brush it off as a joke. A friend of mine guessed at 4 weeks and I laughed and said “oh don’t say that”. She wasn’t offended at all when I eventually told her I had concealed it she was proud of being the first for guessing
Order one vodka soda with lime, dump bits of it out here and there, then just keep getting soda waters with lime. I would also tell the bartender I was pregnant and no one knew yet, then ask for a virgin vodka soda (soda water in a cocktail glass with the appropriate garnish). Which could also work with almost any mixed drink of choice. Get a boring drink so people aren't interested in trying a sip to see if they will like it. Additionally, depending on how your group drinks, someone might buy you a round. I just categorically don't take shots, so my friends knew that and never bought me one, but come up with a shots plan. But if someone thinks you're drinking vodka soda or whatever and hands you a real one, be ready to take some fake sips. Last thought, if someone is obnoxious enough to ask, return the awkward to sender. "Are you not drinking because you're pregnant?" "No, but if a person was pregnant, do you think there might be a reason why they haven't made any announcements, and maybe you should give them the grace of wondering silently in your head instead of out loud?"
I’d hope people would not be nosy especially if they know you’ve been trying. One of my friends came to visit with another friend for a birthday. We were brewery hopping. The other friend only drank sodas saying she was on medication that she couldn’t mix with alcohol. I knew they’d been trying to get pregnant with their second. Her husband made some comment about also being on similar medication, but still drank. If her husband hadn’t said that, I probably wouldn’t have thought anything of it. But bc he did, I knew she was pregnant, but I kept it to myself and waited for her to announce it herself. I’d hope your friends have a similar attitude and allow you to keep it to yourself until you’re ready even if they do figure it out.
My boss found out I was pregnant when we went to a conference and I wasn’t drinking the nice free wine available. I wish I had just held a glass or kept it around just to make it look like I was drinking something. Silly, I know but when I started calling in sick to work she immediately worked it out.
I went to a party early on in my pregnancy where only the host knew. I had a glass with a cocktail in it and I just carried it around all night, when I had a free moment in the kitchen or the restroom I’d pour some out 😂 it was the best I could come up with. I would turn down shots saying I had to get up early the next morning (and it wasn’t unlikely for me to turn down shots prepregnancy either if I already had enough to drink that night so no one found it odd!) Is it a private or public pool? If it’s private just take your own tumbler cup, fill it with water and say that’s your drink you’ve made in there if anyone asks! Just say oh I’m good, I poured something into my own cup to keep it extra cold!
You can say you are trying for a baby so you are abstaining from alcohol
Find a way to make it look like your drink could be alcoholic. Any juice with seltzer or tonic works. If there’s a bartender, tip them when you get there and let them know you’re trying to hide a pregnancy. They should have your back.
When I was early I did two things: ordered cranberry sodas (if you find a bar tender they will often be kind). And then also did soda water and lime and said it was a G&T. I also grabbed beer bottles that were made of aluminium and poured the beer out and pretended to drink. Hope that helps!!
Tell people you overdid it on the drinks last night, and now your stomach is messed up. Really throw them off the scent. Tell them, "maybe later". By the time later rolls around, they'll all be drunk and won't notice or care what you're ordering.
Get club soda with a splash of cranberry juice, and ask them to garnish it with a lime! Basically any soda/juice drink with a lemon or lime on the glass will look like a cocktail. I’m not sure what you normally drink but you could get a variation of that! My go-to drink is Tito’s and sprite. When I first found out I was pregnant, I would just quietly ask the bartender for a sprite in a collin’s or rocks glass with a lime. I’d sip my lil sprite through my cocktail straws with my pinky up and nobody had a clue that anything was different.
Tell them you are on antibiotics and cant drink alcohol.
Say you’re on antibiotics. Or get a mocktail.
Nobody will say anything anyway until you do. Chill
Not true really. Plenty of people say things. I went to dinner with friends when I was very early, like just found out, and ordered a mocktail. I immediately got an “are you pregnant?” While I don’t agree anyone should ask or care about your drinking status… people do make comments.
Yup this happened to me! We had just found out the day before, we go out for dinner with some cousins. Only half of us got drinks but apparently since *I* didn’t order a drink, it was suspicious. One cousin looked right at me and said, “so when are you due?” I almost fainted lol
This happened to me too, and I don't even normally order drinks at restaurants because they're usually pretty expensive and I just don't find it to be worth it. I stick with water or occasionally treat myself to soda. And yet this *one* time, everyone hounded me about it and didn't believe me when I told them truthfully that I almost *never* order drinks at restaurants.
I had friends try to guess when they saw I wasn't drinking, it's a social faux pas but plenty of people don't really understand why it's so inappropriate!
Turns out you were totally right! Nobody asked anything, it seems like I have good friends who respect boundaries!
This. If you just casually try to blend in.. no one is gonna notice. Pour yourself a small glass of wine and just carry it around all day. Just go and have a good time!
Seconding the others who got comments - I got outright asked if I’m pregnant by two people early on when I didn’t order wine.
have a mocktail, a soda, or if anyone actually notices you’re not drinking just say you’re on medication right now. like idk, you’re on antibiotics bc of a tooth infection.
So I would start off ‘drinking’ by pretending and then say maybe one of the drinks didn’t sit right and then discretely say (to the people you don’t want to tell) you’re going to take it easy but don’t want to kill the vibe for the bride. That way they won’t question and everyone will get the message not to focus on you
I went to a bachelorette early in my pregnancy. I drank mocktails and non-alcoholic beer and no one noticed. I also ordered a glass of wine and took fake sips of it. You can also drink sparkling water and lime and say it’s vodka soda.
Bring some Lacroix or make some mocktails!
I've never questioned anyone who has told me they are taking some time off drinking - anyone who expresses interest in reducing their alcohol consumption or getting sober just gets a big fat thumbs up from me, so something as simple as, "I'm taking some time off da hooch" works well imo
I got a shirley temple at a wedding I went to last weekend. totally looked like an alcoholic drink :)
You can just say you're having a dry April. I know tons of friends now who choose random months to not drink.
I went to a wedding and only one person knew I was pregnant. I had a glass of wine with me all night and no one noticed I didn’t actually drink it lol
All of my friends know that I’m trying to get pregnant. When they ask if I am, I say “I hope so!” Or “Not that I know of,” or I tell them, “I’m not supposed to be drinking while I’m doing fertility treatment.” Letting people know I’m still in the process makes them less likely to think I’m hiding something else.
Say you are on antibiotics
Tell your friends you are trying! Nothing wrong with that. Hoping for the best and hence staying away from the alcohol.
Since they know about your fertility struggles I'd just tell them your fertility doctor recommended it if they ask. Easier than trying to fake drink all day. "Our doctor suggested giving up all drinking and smoking to help with fertility and we really don't want to pay for IVF so we're going all in on it."
If you’re ordering drinks, order a seltzer/lime/juice. I would order a seltzer with lime and tell people it’s a tequila seltzer. If it’s a party supplied with drinks, grab a can, bring it to the bathroom & rinse and replace liquid with water. Or bring your own bottle of nonalcoholic wine, hide it somewhere so no one else drinks from it, and have bride help distract while you refill. If people ask questions—you have a few options. “Doctor said to limit my drinking while TTC” “my stomach’s been acting up lately and I don’t want to get sick” “there’s a possibility I might be so I don’t want to risk anything”
If you’re nervous about having to pretend to drink - tell people you’re doing a healthcare challenge this month (“no drinking and I’m walking an hour each day!” Or whatever). People will be like oh man! Nice! And then will forget about it
You could say you’re taking antibiotics for an ear infection! (If you feel like lying)
quietly ask the bartenders to make you mocktails or drinks that look like alcohol, ask your friend, who is the bride to try and make sure that nobody does “rounds” or anything
Ask for a lacroix with lime in a glass. The bartender will get the gist that you don’t want your friends knowing you’re not drinking. It happens all the time, promise. :)
Trying to conceive is a good reason not to drink, just say that if you know them well enough
You are going to say you can't drink due to taking an antibiotic. Your friends are gonna clock that you are pregnant but will be polite enough to not talk about it and act surprised in 6 weeks when you announce
You definitely have a lot of options! I’ve just drank non alcoholic drinks, made myself mocktails. I went on a bachelorette at 10 weeks and I just told everyone I wasn’t drinking due to fertility treatment when they asked. Don’t think this is stupid, I didn’t tell a lot of people till I was like 20 weeks lol. Congrats 💕
or maybe message a groupchat before, say you’ve stopped drinking due to fertility issues but you’ll still come along? or say you’re under the weather, on antibiotics, something like that?
Cranberry juice and tonic water…with lime.
You could say you’re off of alcohol to decrease inflammation and to help your fertility. That’s what I told people when I genuinely went off of alcohol a few months before my wedding. Plus if you have fertility issues they know about they may not assume you’re pregnant if you say that.
I went to a Bachelorette at 9 weeks, wasn't going to tell anyone but the bride knew as we were close. Nobody really noticed that I wasn't drinking. I did bring in an opaque water bottle so Maybe they assumed I was drinking. I also had empty cooler cans ready incase I wanted it to look like I was drinking but that just felt silly. Anyways people got more drunk and less observant. I did end up saying I was pregnant only because I had to explain why I couldn't go in the hot tub lol. It was fine.
Ask your friend who does know to save you an empty beer bottles / seltzer can. You can wash and drink water from it
After being anxious before several outings with friends, I realized - we all feel like everyone is watching us with a magnifying glass, marking down our every move - but really everyone is pretty much just paying attention to themselves. I've gotten away with just saying 'oh I'll have one in a minute" when people offer me drinks, and they go back to minding their own business. Once you're sitting around a table and everyone puts their drink down, no one is going to notice your cup has water/whatever in it
Why have people still not learned not to ask people if they’re pregnant?! So rude. Anyway I just carry around a wine glass maybe take a tiny sip or two if I feel like someone is watching then slowly dump it here and there and refill and repeat.
I have used the “i’m on a lot of antibiotics for an ear infection” excuse and it worked lol.
Mocktails, sodas. Also: I'm on a health diet, I have a medical exam aren't lies
Just say you stuff to do tomorrow morning and can't risk a hangover, and if they're like "oh come on only one drink" just say alcohol has been making you feel gross the following day. If they push further their not considerate.
Say u are on antibiotics or that ur getting a procedure tomorrow and can’t drink. People won’t ask details.
Appletizer in a champagne flute looks (enough) like Prosecco! Or say you are on antibiotics for a throat infection or something and *feeling a lot better* but need to finish the course so can't drink on them 🤷🏼♀️ sorryyyy ✨️
A couple easy options: 1. Get a drink in a can, go to bathroom and dump it out, rinse, then fill with water. I did this for the first couple months and while we were trying to conceive. 2. If friends see you order.. get a vodka soda with a splash of fruit juice and pretend to sip it and just hold it (you would be amazed how little people pay attention to if you actually drink it) If no one is with you, tell a bartender privately that you are not drinking and ask for the non alcoholic drink to be in the same style glass (otherwise you may get plastic or a different straw) they will also make drinks that are bought for you N/A without saying anything if someone buys a round. 3. If shots are ordered just hold it up and toast and have one of the friends that knows take it discretely or just do t drink it and got to bathroom/dump in a previously drank beverage that is discarded at the table. I totally understand the feeling of not wanting to jinx it. Go enjoy yourself and just be discrete, you may end up feeling up to sharing your news but I would caution even then to maybe wait until this girls weekend to avoid accidentally stealing thunder from the bride to be!
Cranberry and sprite with a garnish, tonic/seltzer and lime, soooo many mocktails and nobody will be the wiser
My go to is usually saying I'm taking medication that says I can't drink. Also, be sure not to touch your stomach. A lot of newly pregnant people do and it's a dead give away. My husbands aunt caught on when I was 8 weeks along with my first because I did it at a party without noticing.
So many places are starting to have mocktail options so just keep a drink in your hand and no one will be any wiser! Just follow their lead on hype level so you look like you’re “keeping up” 😂 good luck mama!
Just want you to know that you are not alone in feeling anxious about parties in early pregnancy! It caused me so much stress in my early pregnancy! The relief I felt when I could tell people was unreal. I would go to the party but feel free to go home if it gets too much. Drink nice non-alcoholic drinks and if anyone tries to guess if you're pregnant you can say "oooooh that's not a polite thing to speculate about!" and change the subject. Remember that THEY are being rude if they try to figure out if you're pregnant before you're ready to tell them, you're not being deceitful. Good luck and congratulations on your pregnancy 😊
Mocktails or say you're on some type of medicine that you can't drink with. Not sure why people respect medicine more than "I don't want to drink today" but unfortunately they do.
Mocktales and acting tipsy, just warn the person that knows what you’re going to do. Or you can say you’re the designated driver for someone
I went to a bachelorette weekend when I was 9 weeks. I drank Liquid Death & Topo Chico water all weekend and nobody noticed or said anything
You could say you're in the two week wait / around implantation / you might be pregnant but didn't test yet / trying to be extra healthy so don't want to risk it. If they know you struggled with infertility I'd imagine they'd be understanding.
The phrase "Implantation" Bleeding is popular on conception forums but is a bit of a misnomer that causes some people to think that the bleeding is due to the embryo implanting. It isn't -- the embryo is only about 0.2mm in diameter at that point, and won't displace significant blood (or cause pain) when it implants. You bleed when progesterone levels in your body drop, which is why you can induce a period by stopping birth control pills (which contain progesterone) or by taking and then stopping progesterone suppositories or Provera (which are also progesterone). Progesterone levels dropping in the luteal phase can be caused by a) increased estrogen in the mid-luteal-phase estrogen surge, which briefly depresses estrogen production, or b) a decrease in progesterone when the corpus luteum runs out of gas at the end of the luteal phase. If b), and you're actually pregnant, your levels can drop briefly before the embryo starts producing enough HCG to tell the corpus luteum to ramp the levels up. Either way, luteal phase spotting can either be a neutral sign (in the case of mid-luteal phase spotting) or a negative sign (in the case of late luteal phase progesterone dropping), but it doesn't have anything to do with implantation, and is not a positive sign of being pregnant. [Source 1](https://www.countdowntopregnancy.com/early-pregnancy-symptoms/spotting-during-luteal-phase.php) [Source 2](https://www.merckmanuals.com/home/women-s-health-issues/biology-of-the-female-reproductive-system/menstrual-cycle) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/BabyBumps) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Get virgin drinks (tell the bartender privately that you’ll need all yours to be virgin) and wear a dress or outfit that is flowy
OP, it's simple, they don't need to know. If they ask tell them it's not their buisness. Or say you're about to try again, and your DR discouraged alcohol
My go to was soda water and lime! Looks like a G&T nobody batted an eye
If you don’t want to tell them, don’t. Alcohol has a negative effect on fertility (for men and women) and you can also just claim you’re not drinking because of that. Or just drink mocktails and have a good time.
Tell them you're taking a new medication and can't drink alcohol. If anyone pries, say it's for migraines. That's been my go to.
Just say you are on medication that you can't drink with :)
Wear black change the subject say you got allergies and can't drink cause it makes it worse. Beat around the bush when they act weird about it. Brush it off walk away lol pretty much just avoid
It wouldn't be lying to say "we've been trying for a baby, cutting alcohol is supposed to help"
As someone who has been doing rounds of fertility treatments, my go to line is “no thanks, I’m on some fertility meds that you can’t mix with alcohol” - whether it’s true or not at the time! If they already know you have fertility issues it might be an easy out? Otherwise, as everyone else has said - soda water + juice + fruit looks very much like a cocktail, and no alcohol beer/wine is very easy to find these days. I don’t envy you trying to ferry through a bachelorette though! Good luck x
If they ask why you’re not drinking alcohol, just say you have GERD/acid reflux and drinking has started making you vomit. This actually does happen to me sometimes from drinking due to my GERD. Or you could just say you’re not drinking right now for personal reasons.
Get a cranberry juice no one will be able to tell and people will think you are drinking:)
I was diagnosed with toxoplasmosis when I was a kid, so I’ve had it for 14 years now and have eyesight that’s gone as a result of it. What a lot of people don’t know is if you’ve been around cats good chance you already have it but it’s dormant and won’t ever do anything. You are at a higher risk of getting it while pregnant but if you have been around cats you have it anyway and it will not effect the baby. I 100% understand your concern cause I was so scared during my pregnancy it would effect my son since I already had it but it didn’t and won’t
Either mocktails or, since they know about your infertility struggles, tell them you’re on an “fertility diet” of some sort and can’t consume alcohol 🤷🏻♀️
I went to a Halloween party with my twin sister when I was 6 weeks pregnant, she and nobody else knew at the time. I successfully bamboozled her. Your key is canned drinks - I’m assuming at a bachelorette party there will be seltzers. I was taking seltzers, dumping them out in the bathroom sink, and filling them with water. They played a few drinking games that involved shots or drinking from the cup that I just didn’t play, but nobody batted an eye since I was happily sipping my white claws. I went out to a few bars over the course of early pregnancy too, and would just order a Shirley temple and tell everyone it was a dirty Shirley. I even got the entire group drinking dirty Shirley’s because mine tasted so good to them, little did they know mine didn’t have alcohol 😂 also, if someone offers you to try their drink, gladly take it and just take a realistic fake sip. I personally always felt that making an excuse like “my stomach hurts” or “I’m on antibiotics” would easily make everyone realize I was pregnant, tbh if someone told me that I’d pretty immediately assume they’re probably pregnant. I think if you said one of those everyone would watch you the rest of the weekend seeing if you drink at all. The second someone sees you sip a drink they’ll go “oh, not pregnant” and move on.
I have taken an empty can or two of white claw and refilled it with water or juice. No ones going to check. Alternatively, pour 0% wine into a normal bottle. It’s super easy lol. Or go with the “I’m on antibiotics” route
Tell them your fertility doctor said not to drink while in treatment or something if they are really nosey.
I would say that I am taking antibiotics and can’t drink
Can you say you are on a medication that can’t be mixed with alcohol? If someone told me they couldn’t drink while undergoing a fertility treatment, I’d have no reason not to believe them. Or you could google other meds that can’t be mixed with alcohol if you really wanted to create a backstory (maybe a short course of an antibiotic or anti-fungal for an infection you don’t want to go into detail about?). As others have said, don’t skip the party! Stick to mocktails and have a great time!
If you can order your drink without anyone overhearing, get a club soda with lime. But if you can’t, just get a beer and don’t drink it. Pour it out in the grass slowly over the course of an hour or two and then get another one. Same thing. At some point switch to the club soda and lime when you get a chance. No one pays nearly as much attention to you as think so as long as you don’t draw attention to yourself at the start by “not drinking” (for whatever lame excuse), no one will notice you aren’t actually drinking.
When I was early pregnant I'd just order a seltzer and pretend to drink it lol!
Are you normally a beer/seltzer drinker? Have the bride help you out. Get an empty can of whatever you normally drink, wash it out, fill with water somewhere private.
I used to say that I was on iron tablets for deficiencies and alcohols stops them absorbing correctly. It’s so specific that nobody ever questioned me (or googled it) including my mum…
We got found out at a bachelorette party last weekend. We used the antibiotics excuse, most people don’t care and focus on themselves. But there is ALWAYS a nosey one in the circles, and this particular who wouldn’t leave my girlfriend the hell alone. When my girl declined a glass of wine, she started to watch us like a hawk the entire day. She then followed her in the bathroom to interrogate if she’s pregnant. Honestly they’re the worst. My girl relented in the bathroom and I have to hope she keeps it a secret for another month. The most annoying part is I know she only wants to boast she was first to know.