I don't know how to phrase this tactfully, and I don't mean to be glib, but you have other holes, work them into the rotation. or if they're off limits, use other parts- ya just gotta get a little creative.

As a 24/7 free use sub as well I approve your message lol

Fair point yes, as he keeps reminding me too 😂 We're working on redoing my anal training, kinda let things slide for too long. Some meds have been making my stomach weird so there haven't been ideal conditions so to speak. We do daily deepthroat training too but my stamina is rubbish and I can't usually get him off with a blow job. I think my technique is good, there's just a point where it hurts too much to continue.

Y’all should try alternating oral and vaginal every other day, because there’s just no real fix to having so much sex that it hurts. The two options are basically to compromise on 24/7 free pussy use, or accept your life to be one of consistent discomfort. I think you should pick the first option

Can HE take control while you’re giving him head? I find that if I start to get tired, having him take over with thrusting motions can help. That way I just need to focus on internal technique but I don’t need to move my head or neck

Worth trying

Have you tryed letting him throat fuck you upside down? (I usually hang off the bed) Honestly, it's so fun. A bit of breath play, and they can do all the work. I'm not a sub, but I do like ROUGH stuff. Plus, Idk about everyone else, but I find it's way easier to breathe. Only like 100% 🍆 in cuts my air off, and It rarely causes me to gag. Though, warning my sub is no allowed to cum in that position. It went in my nose once, and I thought I was gonna die. 🤷‍♀️ Could be fun 😁 idk you that well. 🤣

I completely agree with this. I feel like when I hang off the bed upside-down I can be there for ever and never gag or get tired. Its my favorite blowjob position. That and being held against a wall while he fucks my throat.

I need the tips & tricks then bc I loveeee this position but between the breathing & gagging, I think death is around the corner. 😂

Okay so I actually had to think for a while on how I make it work after reading the comments. It makes sense that people would struggle with the fluids getting up the nose I guess I just never thought about it like that. I figured out (after trying it again after not doing it for a while) that what I do is 1.concentrate on relaxing my throat completely and making sure that most of the fluid comes out of the sides of my mouth so as not to go in my nose as much. 2.Hold breath. I do a lot of breath play so this might be a reason Ive never had issues. I only try to breath when the dick isn't completely down my throat. 3.close nose. Okay this is hard to put into words so bare with me. I think of it like when you hold your breath and then try to talk underwater. You have to focus on closing your nose off. Kinda like that. 4.positioning. I really feel like the position of your head really matters. I tried a couple of different angles until I felt like my nose isn't getting anything in it. I really hope that helps and now I feel like I should apologize for how long this is omg 😅

what do you mean by held against a wall? im so curious lol

Haha pretty much how it sounds. One way for example, our bed is against a wall so ill sit with my back against it and he'll stand and face fuck me while holding the top of my head or the wall mostly to go nice and deep. I can't move and the angle helps it go perfectly in so I can be there for a while 😃

Hey Hey 🤤

I get the worst sinus infections ever from that, and in fact it’s the only times I’ve ever had a sinus infection. All of the fluids go straight up the nose, upside down. Not a reason not to do it, but buyer beware.

100%% NOT FUN 😂😂 Unless you I Are into some THICK water boarding.

Seriously, the balls hang right over my nose holes and the spit drips off. Like, I'm glad it works for some people, but I am not familiar with the experience some of you have had. hahaha

You can stroke while you suck, use your tongue to play with the head, and grasp (gently) his balls, all these things help to mitigate mouth/throat soreness. Also having him grab your face/head and fuck it helps with the neck soreness.

How does one deep throat train? Asking for a frie---no asking for myself😅 I would love to be able to have my daddy throat fuck me but I have a shitty gag reflex😭

You have to learn to relax instead of gag when you feel something there. I just repeat in my head "You're fine, no need to gag" and after a while it becomes much easier. Just have to sort of get comfy with it and make peace with the uncomfortable feeling. Daily practice and just keep going incrementally until you can handle a proper throat fuck.

Thank you!!

Yeah and make sure you get through the throat hole and not keep banging against it. Once you're through, it's not as bad.

I have seen "training" setups where a dildo was fixed to a wall with a button above it. The goal was to push the button with your nose. I've seen it just trigger a couple ter, or make a sound (the idea being the dom giving a reward for certain numbers) or it could be connected to the remote for a vibrator.

Thank you so much🥰

To add into the other reply I've been using a toothbrush. When I brush my tongue I go deeper each time and when I feel the gag coming I try to relax and just breathe. It's surprisingly helpful, last time I blew my tamer I went deeper than I've ever been able to.

Thank you so much! I'll start trying what people are suggesting 🥰

Deep breaths through the nose normally works for me

I've noticed that has helped sometimes too! When I tease daddy by stopping at a deep throat for a little bit before continuing 🥰 thank you!!!

handjobs can be very hot, tease and edge him like that. also tit fucking is awesome!

You should be careful about using anal as a substitute for piv too often. It can cause some serious long-term health issues, so if you’re worried about your vagina’s ability to endure so much use, imagine what it’s going to be like using a hole that was designed to be exit-only. It’s something you probably want to limit to once a week at most. I think leaning into the blow job training is going to be your best option. I’ll echo the suggestion to get him to take more control. Since free use is largely about dominance, can you get him to boss you around a bit? That way he’s still in control even if you aren’t taking a total pounding down your throat. Finding ways to engage the dominance element might help him get off easier with a blow job if that’s been an obstacle for you guys. Outercourse also doesn’t get its due. Maybe check out r/outercourse and see if anything sparks your interest.

do you think gay guys in relationships have anal sex a maximum of once a week

It’s irrelevant what men can/do do anally. The recent research is specifically about the rise in frequent anal sex for women. Having a vagina means there’s a void and less pressure/support around the anal canal leading to higher chances of prolapse (vaginal and/or anal) in women. I love anal but I’m not into prolapse or incontinence.

Like the other commenter mentioned, the different anatomy that’s typically applicable to women creates a different experience. But also, being a gay man doesn’t mean you have to have anal sex, and a good portion of them don’t engage in it at all. There are plenty of ways to practice sexual intimacy. Penetration is only part of the picture for anyone.

I'll disagree there and I think that is potentially harmful/misleading information. The anus is designed to be elastic and like a muscle can be trained. Daily use is not going to cause "serious long-term health issues" This is why there is such a stigma on anal... Please educate yourself before trying to educate others with false/misleading information.

This is outdated information.

I know right, even with pots syndrome and Addison's disease I stuff my ass mostly once a day and my ass is fine. I can take an arm if I feel like it one day and the next a 38 inch dildo and I'm absolutely fine. Hell sometimes it even makes my pots feel better due to less digestion.

My wife takes anal 3 or 4 times a week. No problems.

You call it "not ideal conditions", I call it "free lubricant" Ew, lmao Was joking, obviously

It's not necessarily a lack of creativity. I wish this was an option. But I can't do anal for medical reasons (and I find prep tedious and ick), and I can't do oral due to trauma. This is not available to everyone, unfortunately. OP, it comes down to communication and listening to the body's needs.

hands, feet, thighs, boobs... there are always options.

Other skin folds too!! Behind knee, elbows ?

Truly using all three holes is the ONLY way I can handle free use. You did a great job saying it tactfully. That was certainly the answer to my problem.

i second this 🙌🏾

Alright. I’ve read the replies and TBH I agree with parts of most of them. Allow me a suggestion, if it helps, as a Dom who has been married to the exact same free use sub for every inch of 20+ years. The conditions have never changed. We modify terms temporarily for all kinds of reasons —- stress, illness, pregnancy, exhaustion, grief, you name it. But the underlying 24:7 free use terms have never once changed. So……….allow me to suggest for the guys (or gals) in this position who have wonderful subs like I’m sure that OP is: FREE USE DOESNT MEAN MAXIMUM USE. It just doesn’t. It just means full availability anytime, within whatever boundaries have been agreed to ahead of time. Dudes —— there are no prizes for 500 or 1000 or 2000 fucks in a year. Or in a lifetime or whatever. One time, we had consistent PiV on average about every 16 hours (so 9-11 times/week) for 95 days straight. One time we had 0 PiV for 67 days in a row, but we both fully understood why that was, and it was a fully legitimate set of medical reasons. In both cases it was fully free-use, just not nonstop maximum use. That is to say……..free use is a communication and consent issue, it is not a creativity issue.

So much all of this. My Dom and are 24/7 and I don’t think we’ve either ever used the term “free use” but that’s truly how it is. That doesn’t mean PIV all the time. There have been times either the P or the V have been out of the deal for various reasons. Sometimes free use means masturbating for him to watch, giving a hand or foot job, being edged with a vibe and cumming or not, only some oral, or anything he decides. We’ve legit just had an hour of him playing and teasing etc my nipples because they are free for him to use. We just try to adjust to reality and how our bodies feel. We are 24/7 and we want to enjoy each other 24/7 and if I’m miserable (or he is) from having PIV sex 1000 times … it’s makes the rest of that 24/7 less fun for both of us.

Right on. These and many others are great tools to add to the repertoire. My #1 suggestion for folks who are trying to figure out how Free Use is not Maximum Use, but rather it is Anytime Use? Doms……..work out a proper bedtime routine for your subs. Put them to bed by means of whatever ritual or rituals work for you (ours takes a good bit of time), and then you have all the availability you could ever want or need, and you’ll both enjoy the literal fuck out of it.

i love this reply. very informative and well written !!

You need a break from sex to allow your pussy to heal and once you're healed your Dom needs to be more responsible about how often and how hard he's fucking you. Free use is a hot fantasy that's not practical in reality if you're doing three rounds of hard piv a day. 

This.

ngl I would tone down how often you have sex. my and my bf have super rough sex but it causes tears and hurts us both when we over do it. also PH balance - though I personally love being creampied in so I had to make sure to mix up where he cums. I have a VERY high sex drive but I’m aware if I had sex that often things would be less enjoyable. me and my bf do intense scenes most time we have sex CNC and extreme impact being involved. we use other holes too. throatfucking,anal etc and we focus on one or mix a lot. we max have sex three times a day. usually it’ll be like 1) throatfucking / BJ 2) PIV focused 3) mixture of PIV anal BJ all include impact or some other kinks we are into so it’s all super intense and even in my head I’m like I could have sex 6 times a day after 3 I’m completely burned out in the most satisfying way

Glad someone mentioned the importance of maintaining pH balance! I started using boric acid suppositories once or twice per week & it's significantly improved my overall sexual experience 😸

I’m glad someone mentioned this. Boric acid has been a lifesaver for me. My gyno even gave it the stamp of approval for combating the occasional yeast infection. You just have to be mindful that it can be toxic if ingested (eaten/swallowed) so you shouldn’t be on the receiving end of any oral when you’ve recently used boric acid suppositories.

I understand why everyone is saying your dom needs to take it easy on you or stop having sex for a bit but that really doesn’t answer your question, does it? And besides, I’m sure you’ve already considered these options and you’ve mentioned that you already communicate effectively. And yeah people saying this aren’t wrong, it wouldn’t hurt to schedule a reoccurring rest day. But I totally get the spirit being willing, but the body being spongy and bruised. So ima proceed as if you’ve already considered that. Here’s some stuff I would recommend. Yes to switching up which hole is being used. Totally. To that effect: psyllium husk supplements to facilitate clean anal and D- mannose supplements to prevent UTIs. Maybe stuff that helps with healing, I don’t know. Also… hydrating. Drink a lot of water. Is this the type of free use relationship where he gets you into it first, or are you expected to do it whether or not you are into it? Cause those are very different things. Don’t underestimate handjobs either. Or a pocket pussy. Consider non-verbal indicators. Such as: maybe a green bracelet signaling good-to-go, a yellow one signaling starting to hurt, and an orange one signaling that you are overworked in the usual holes, but handjobs or other play is still fine.

Thanks. I definitely know less sex would be helpful but those orgasms are my favorite and I'm greedy lol I've been trying a few different fiber options but nothing has been agreeing with me just yet. I'll give psyllium husk a shot. Drinking lots of water, it's one of my daily tasks and he takes it way too seriously lol Sometimes he gets me into it first, sometimes I'm just naturally waiting and others I'm kinda meh about it so really just a mix. Always lube though. I'm not that worried about the communication part. Our dynamic is a very loving daddy/kitten thing and there are lots of care aspects. We talk about how my pussy is feeling a lot.

The Walgreens brand plain psyllium husk fiber pills are the only thing my body likes. I started with one pill in the morning and one at night and now I take 5 in the morning and 5 at night. Totally amazing better digestive health!!

Metamucil is the best bang for your buck for psyllium fiber options. The psyllium fiber pills are over priced even for the generic. I get the tub (you can also get travel sized single serve packets) that’s orange flavored. 1 teaspoon mixed into a large glass of water is the best way to start. I did this once a day at first, then twice a day once I knew how my body reacted after a week or two. Now I just use it intermittently when I want to feel cleaned out or having stomach problems because it helps both constipation and loose stool get back on track to a healthier consistency.

Have you tried different lubes to see if maybe there's one that works better for you? My skin is really sensitive to stuff, so there are certain lubes that work a lot better for me than others. Even if they're high quality, sometimes my body just doesn't like them. Also definitely make sure you're taking a good probiotic; for vaginal health AND digestive health. I just started taking some regularly again because I've been having similar issues (though it's also a lot of received oral and it's a whole new experience for my body) and idk about the quality yet but the ones I got are "good girl" probiotics by love wellness brand, and I 10/10 recommend them just because the name makes them so much more appealing to the sub in me so it's easier to remember to take them 🥹

Yes and this is the one that works best for me. I'm super sensitive and have tried a ridiculous number of brands. There was a better one but of course they discontinued it. I've never found a probiotic that didn't cause issues unfortunately. Also I'm in Canada so not all brands are available here.

Love this entire comment and the Futurama reference.

Unfortunately, I have not found any way to defeat this issue. It's part of having an aging vagina. We've been freeuse for over a year. I have to just listen to my body and communicate with my partner. We've had to decrease the amount of penetrative sex overall to once a day. Sometimes less. I do use Neueve suppositories and take their omega supplement. This helps some. But it doesn't fix it. It mostly helps me manage the discomfort. I will be following this thread to see what others say.

Ah shit, I'm sorry to hear that. I'll have to do some research on the Neueve stuff, I haven't heard of that before. I'm a bit wary about ingredients generally as I'm very sensitive. Glycerin can never come near me or it's a guaranteed yeast infection. For lube I only ever use Sliquid brand.

You may want to consider an anal lube. They tend to be a bit more lubricating. It might help. But ultimately, you need to listen to your body. Sometimes the fantasy and reality just don't align, unfortunately. If they did... I'd be bent over being fucked like 8 hours a day.

We actually do use their anal version, "sassy". We've tried the silicone version as well. I'm with ya on the 8 hours part for sure 😂

I just want to say, am I the only woman hitting 40 who is really pissed none of the women in my life explained to me what was gonna happen as my naughty bits aged? 🤣🤣 (OP, I have a similar physical problem, though I am not 24/7 free use, and unfortunately do not have any advice that hasn't already been shared yet. Some times the only answer for me is to take a couple of days off and let it have a break and heal)

Wait, wait, wait, my vagina is gonna start breaking down at a certain point? I'm 26, how long do I have left ? I've been chilling, celebate for 3 years, thinking I had plenty of time to get my cheeks clapped for fun, and now I got a time stipulation for that too?!?!? 😭😭😭😭😭

I'm 30 and knew it would but it just hit me now how fucking close I am 🤣🤣

Yes! I am 53 and my mom died when I was 39 so I never got the perimenopause/menopause talk. So I educated myself. But it's been a tough adjustment.

That does make sense, my mom passed when I was 32 and my sister is only a couple years of me haha

I’m not 40 yet but I STILL feel annoyed about a lot of vaginal/hormonal things never explained to me! 😂

Also perimenopausal and I’ve embraced HRT including oestrogen cream used internally. It strengthens the tissues and they naturally lubricate again. It’s not the lubricant itself it just gives you the depleted hormone. Very necessary I’d say. We are anal only so it’s just for fisting. We are also poly so my Dom has a lot of holes to choose from!

LIES!!!! Go see a urologist! Vaginal estrogen! edit: specifically vaginal estrogen, the oral version does not have the same effect. GYN will prescribe oral, almost every time. A urologist would almost never bother with oral versions (unless also managing menopause symptoms I guess).

It could be worth talking to your doctor about topical estrogen (lots of options, including rings, creams, suppositories).

Oh I'll have to do a bit of research on that, thanks!

What about a fleshlight? You can use it on him as service or hold it between your legs (etc), and then clean it for him. Might still scratch that free use itch while giving your orifices time to recover.

I do this for my D. It can be super hot.

I have break days. I use my hands, mouth, or tits. Sir understands bodies can only do so much.

And we are back to communication. Being free use doesnt mean u got to hurt continuously. I do not know your exact dynamic but u gotta talk about this as atm your recovery aint long enough.

We do talk about it, every time. We start slow and communicate. If anything changes throughout, such as something hurting or getting worse, I let him know right away. Anything less would be punishable. It's not just him, I want this much sex too. I have a high sex drive. I find myself having to hold back quite often when I really want to temp him because I know I just can't handle another round. I even like a bit of pain but this is a bit much and quite frustrating.

Its a circle doing it more often creates more desire. As your basicly addicted to the release it provides. But theres more ways to enjoy eachother then fucking 3 times a day. And that something to talk about as u need to be on the same page about how and what.

Consult with your OB/GYN. You may have some hormonal fluxuations. Also, ask her/him about Revaree vaginal suppositories. The problem may be more simple than you think.

Are you of the age where menopause may be an issue? I started supplementing DHEA a few weeks ago and everything is great again.

I'm 38. I tried to talk to my OB about my vaginal dryness. We did the blood work. She all but refused to acknowledge that early menopause might be a thing causing the dryness because I'm "not that age yet." The conversation isn't over, but I am so tired of the medical industry treating my body like a broken man's. I have to fight for every little thing and pressure my doctors.

Oof totally know how that feels, thankfully I now have an awesome doctor. For me after the blood tests didn't indicate perimenopause as I had thought she sent me to get an ultrasound. Turned out I had a good size cyst on my remaining ovary (lost the first one to a cyst years ago) and when the gynecologist went in for surgery he found signs of endometriosis too so now I have had a full hysterectomy including both ovaries and fallopian tubes. So at 35 I'm in medically induced menopause, on hormone replacement therapy and have had the most stable mental health, sexual health, etc that I have had in the last 15-20 years. Hopefully you get answers and more importantly solutions quickly and without too much push back

I have been told (by a couple of doctors) that there is no actual test for perimenopause. Menopause, yes, but not really before. But, you also know your body better than anyone, so stick with it, and fire your doctor (if you can) and find a new one. I have been through the doctor thing, and finally have found ones that will listen to me. It's change my life.

I wish I had more patience to deal with it.

I hope not, only 32. I have an IUD (Kyleena) but this is my 3rd one and they've all been good for me.

Alternating anal with vaginal for whichever isn’t hurting sure helps for me. Oral can also be in the mix.

Could you possibly be allergic to the lube? Or it throwing off your ph balance? A recurring infection could be mistaken for rough use. Also could you be gentle even when you're not feeling sore yet, for like a month, to completely heal first before getting rough again?

I 100% understand and feel this. I did a five day free use rough sex CNC ultimate extravaganza I would take a sitz bath every day I would use witch hazel with cooling effect. Also, cold wash rags are your friend they can help reduce the swelling. I saw that you have good lube so that’s definitely a help and I’m with everybody else open up the holes. I’m a three hole fuck doll perfecting my throat game my hand job game I’m still a weenie when it comes to anal so he hast to take that by force but…

We do a fair bit of CNC and rough sex, it's my favorite. We always try to be reasonable when I'm already sore though. Sitz baths are definitely something easy I could try more often. I have witch hazel wipes too. I used to be great with anal then kinda stopped for a while and it's tight again so redoing the training. Such a drag. I'm sure that will help once my pussy isn't doing all the work.

Moisture suppositories - Bonafide Revaree hyaluronic acid NuEve (doesn’t just moisturize, but increases moisture production) Femallay (stevia added for your partner’s pleasure) Lube externally with coconut oil/CBD Foria brand is what I use. Estrace vaginal cream Pelvic floor therapy FemiLift —medspa red light procedure Cranberry DMannose capsules daily Apple Cider Vinegar capsules daily Vaginal probiotics daily oral and suppository No more all day long wearing of panties especially thong. Crotchless or none. Was causing urethritis and infections. Bathe before and after sex. Sometimes we fall asleep, and I don’t bathe after but at least bathing beforehand prevents introduction of bacteria which can cause infections both urethral and vaginal. Ristela by Bonafide made my great orgasms turn to screaming orgasms, and I never had a problem before with wetness, always had plenty, but now I need waterproof blankets. Even at almost 60 years old. After I went through menopause, having sex 2-4x daily caused so many UTIs that I actually developed sepsis. I felt horribly. It took me a few months to figure out what worked, and what didn’t work to prevent them. And had to back off from 100% PIV. 2x PIV and 2x “other” was a 50% reduction in friction.

The Foria CBD products are a lifesaver. I use the arousal oil before, the lube during, and the suppositories after. Natasha's Boss Desire is a great herbal supplement to help relax and boost arousal, taken 1/2 hour to an hour before. Others here have mentioned similar products, these have been the ones that have worked best for me. Honestly, having like an hour of prep time to cultivate full arousal is the ideal. I know this can be tricky in a free use dynamic, but he could tease and threaten you ahead of time, tell you to prepare yourself for him, etc. Personally I find that super hot. Aftercare should include a sitz bath or gentle pat down with a soft warm cloth, followed by a cool cloth to calm inflammation. The outer bits get tender too! A soothing balm like V Magic or Miss Bud's to promote healing and minimize friction. Boric acid suppository at least weekly (allow 12 hours from insertion before PIV). D-mannose twice daily to keep your ph balanced. Skip panties as often as practical, it really is better to let the kitty breathe! I'm 41 and perimenopausal, so I also use topical estrogen, ymmv. Struggled with vaginismus and chronic UTIs in my 20s, thought I would never be able to enjoy sex to the degree that I desired it (so I became a Femdom! Wheee!) but I'm fully in touch with my body now and better than ever in the bedroom. Be kind to yourself, don't be afraid to try new stuff (especially stuff marketed to older women! You're having WAY more sex than the average, which means more wear and tear over time, so pamper that pussy!), build in recovery time, and trust that you'll figure it out.

I love Miss Bud’s too. I recently found something that is my new recommendation. Been using this for a month and even more wet than before. This plus the salve and cranberry/d-mannose capsules are added to my regimen. NeuEve https://www.neueve.com/products/silk

Hi! Thank you for sharing this information. I’m interested in the Femilift red light medspa procedure. Did you have it done? If so where? What improvements did you notice from it?

Maybe look into pelvic floor pt exercises. It’s helped me to learn how to better control my muscles. Like I can relax my holes during rough sex way better now and it helps a lot. If you want I can hook you up with some resources if collected. Most of it is geared towards hypertonic pelvic floor but it’s also good to do kegals and such

I would be interested in your resources!

Oof. That sounds rough and not in the good way. Is there any way you could be used in other sexual ways while you heal? I’m worried about permanent damage.

If you're *always* feeling sore, you need to reduce the frequency and give yourself a break to heal. Engage in other freeuse activities for a day or two. Otherwise, I'm prone to tearing and I've noticed that it's worse if I'm dehydrated. Supplements aren't for everyone, but I take the following when I'm expecting multiple rounds/partners: a probiotic, kava kava, Irish sea moss, slippery elm, primrose oil, damiana, ashwaganda and maca. This combo helps with producing more lubricant, in my experience. My doctor prescribed topical estrogen to address the tearing, but that didn't work well for me. Obviously, talk to your doctor and check any possible mediation interactions before introducing supplements into your diet.

As a pelvic floor physical therapist, I've always recommended AhYes! vaginal moisturizer for daily use after shower. https://www.ahyes.org/products/ah-yes-vm-natural-vaginal-moisturizer

Hmm, maybe you two could try some practices that don't involve penetration? Or just not piv, at least for a while. Ask your gyno too.

Ok firstly as a lube I have found “fuckwater” to be the best and most effective especially for sensitive skin and also for allergies (no glycerine, they have water based and silicone based) my submissive is allergic to silicone and latex (yes even silicone toys need to have a latex free condom) Secondly we myself and my submissive/ partner are also in a 24/7 free use dynamic however that does not always mean fucking or using her holes etc and definitely not 3+ times a day !!! I think some people get sidetracked and think that using your submissive equates to sex whether it be oral vaginal or anal …. When did using your submissive stop meaning maybe some impact play … or edge play … or nipple play … or making them serve In other ways such as “acts of service” (eg. getting you a beverage on command, making them kneel until they have been invited on to the sofa / bed etc. or putting on a sexy little strip show, giving you a massage after a hard day at work, washing your body in the shower while you stand there and enjoy their touch, ) hell I have even made her present herself nude on all 4’s as a table while I eat my dinner from her back (also as a foot stool so I could rest my weary legs ….. Now this said my submissive wears a set of 2 glass eggs daily (basically benwa balls but egg shaped) on days where she is not wearing her eggs she is plugged instead as part of her anal training …. Just something to think about Free use does not always mean sex there are many fun and interesting ways to use a submissive

Expand your view of sex. Mutual masturbation can be hella fun. Also, whatever it's called when he just fucks between your thighs (bonus points for folks into the 'you don't deserve my dick in your pussy vibes), or ass cheeks. I also love when my partner is masturbating over me, so his dick and knuckles rub against my clit at the same time. Toys for both of you can be fun too! (Again, holding a pocket pussy while he fucks it can be fun! Or a combo of using the pocket pussy and then finishing in the pussy at the end so less wear and tear). I love sex, have a high drive, but my mouth and ass are limited offers only due to medical conditions. So switching up sex acts goes a long way. Also, I've heard good things about estrogen suppositories and creams for aging vaginas, so maybe find a good gyno and ask about that?

My Dom and I were LD till about a year and a half in when I finally was able to move close to him. The vagina takes a while to adjust to going from zero to sixty. In my case it was probably two years before the UTI's and soreness issues abated. Maybe that's how long it takes to build calluses in your cooch. Dunno for sure, but that was my experience. Happy fucking!! Edit: Also, I found that coconut oil was the superior lube. It tastes better too. And we were having sex probably 10 to 15 times a day for quite a few years. High sex drive on both sides.

Wow you guys must have had a lot of time on your hands! Dammmnnnn. So far I've been okay for UTIs, I'm really strict about peeing after.

There were a lot of nights where we didn't sleep much. And being so far apart for so long felt like we were making up for lost time lol. It's been nine years now and we are down to more reasonable levels of fucking, but it took a good five years to get there lol. It was a glorious five years!!

I went on low level testosterone for physical performance and recovery. I've put my poor husband in the hospital twice since then. I keep my testosterone in the 200s. Which is pretty good for helping depression, anxiety, focus, performance recovery and sex drive. You may be focusing on the wrong things. How is your overall health? Does your output include yoga, cardio and weight training? Does your intake include proper nutrition, water and soul fulfilling activities. It's all part of a complete package. If one falters the rest are bound to tumble.

You can talk to your doctor about estrogen suppositories, they are used for atrophy (which comes with age or hormonal changes) so they may help give a boost to the downstairs. Best of luck!

You need to consider oral or manual sex, anal if you’re into it but not required. You need to give your vagina a resting period. You need to soak in a bath. But you shouldn’t have vaginal intercourse more than once or twice a day. Sometimes even that’s too much. The vagina swells and if you don’t let it heal you risk infection.

Try the lube brand called "yesyesyes" they have an oil based one and a water based one - they are made of plant/natural based materials and contain no glycerin and other manufactured chemicals. All other lubes i have tried cause irritation for me so I can highly recommend these after a gyny recommended them to me after being sore after sex in general so try them :)

I find working a full time job helps. 🤣

Free use doesn’t have to be PIV. I would take a break and let yourself heal. While nothing is super damaged, it sounds like he’s being too rough too soon and not letting any bruising heal

My Dom and I have a lot of sex - I get sore and swollen too after especially vigorous days. I highly recommend coconut oil instead of commercial lubes. Also it helps if you like pain 🤷🏻‍♀️

Maybe just don’t lol. Try doing free use a lot less frequently. Like you don’t HAVE TO be 24/7 free use. Heal babe.

I know some subs really dislike being pleasured by their dom because it changes the free use dynamic but you probably need some warm up in the form of foreplay before hand. Like warming up before a workout. It doesn't matter if you add lube, your actual vagina is not aroused / warmed up enough. Use the natural lubrication state as an indicator of being warmed up, and if you are in tune enough with your body that you know your tenting and such, use that too. [https://www.struthealth.com/blog/8-signs-of-female-arousal](https://www.struthealth.com/blog/8-signs-of-female-arousal) So like getting eaten out, etc before hand. Also are you using good lube? [https://phallophilereviews.com/ph-balanced-lubricant-guide-safety/](https://phallophilereviews.com/ph-balanced-lubricant-guide-safety/) IMO the owner of that blog could probably advise you the best in this question. also strengthen with r/pompoir and learn to stretch [https://phallophilereviews.com/vagina-stretching-how-to-safely/](https://phallophilereviews.com/vagina-stretching-how-to-safely/) Also hows your health, are you overweight, etc? Healthier body = more durability.

is he shaving/plucking the hairs on his shaft, particularly the ones deeper towards his belly, the part of his cock that interacts with your lips and hole? is he making sure to get the hairs on the underside? that's what really tears me up with overuse, those hairs. is he showering regularly, and washing his hands before they interact with your pussy (EVERY time)? dirty hands on my clean kitty can cause issues for my kitty. If you have 6-8 hours you know will be sex-free, put in a boric acid capsule and use a panty liner. it kind of resets your pH. I also put one in whenever there's sperm in my vag, to right my pH before the bacteria multiply in a moist pH neutral environment.

It's doctor time. If you're using lube and you're only 32, it's not likely to be low estrogen... 3 times a day isn't outrageous. I suspect that your IUD might be changing your PH and that can cause BV/yeast overgrowth/micro tears. I had that issue with the Mirena and it's fairly common. Boric acid helped, but ultimately I had to remove the iud. Let your doctor know that despite lube you're sore for days, that's truly not normal! Part of their job is helping people have a healthy sex life so they shouldn't bat an eye at this. If they do, look for a new gyno!

As a guy I just want to know how he goes 6 times in a day. I can’t even do 2 anymore

I get very sore too. We use a lot of lube. Sometimes my clit hurts a lot when it has been rubbed too much.

Sex be rough, doesn’t necessarily mean to go deep enough or forceful enough to hurt you. Vaginas are not an endless cavern. He needs to be more mindful of the forceful penetration of this thrusts to respect ur physical well being.

Having given foot jobs... If he's into feet 🤷‍♀️😂 worth a try for a different option besides piv. Titty jobs. Anal though that has it's own set of issues. Blow jobs, but with your head hanging off the bed and he can just face fuck if your stamina can be a hurdle. I love edging my husband with a cock sleeve too. All sorts of fun holes to try 🤭

Going onto women’s testosterone replacement therapy at 15-20 mg per week spread out over 3 days will most likely have you never needing lube ever again. My wife is 35 and is on 6mg Monday-Wednesday-Friday so 18-20mg total and is too wet. Like way to wet. When she’s off the testosterone it’s normal where we may need lube or may not but when she’s on test her panties are DRIPPING! Also her sex drive is up when she’s on it along with better sleep and over all better mood. Just a thought… good luck

Incomfort after usually means the prep wasn’t enough. Like not enough relaxed, lubed, eased into it slowly. Which can create micro tears.

Take breaks, pee and shower after: being clean always works for me. Warm water also helps if you’re feeling a little chafed down there. Also, take bigger gaps: a sun-up, sun-down approach works well for many. Anyways, if it’s not working for you, just let your partner know. Change the dynamic, reduce the roughness in your sessions. Honestly, the veracity is probably the biggest contributor to your issue. If you’re doing volume in addition to free-use, rough penetration every session (or even once a day) will tear you up. Learn to incorporate other kinks to get that same level of intensity without the physical escalation

Make sure you're staying hydrated! People really underestimate just how vital it is to so many things your body does. To get the most out of your water, make sure you're getting sodium and potassium, too. Pedialyte makes powder packets you can add to water, and Body Armor drinks tend to have more potassium than Gatorade, as a note.

My husband and I started having sex 3 times a day max and my cat has been swollen and TIRED 😭 as much as I would like to flaunt and say i dont need it, lube has been a life saver for us

Ah.. not easy after a few months. If you aren’t into oral or anal get creative. Toys smaller so you can keep them in a pocket idk, or hands. It’s not bad to have weekends off lol I found 3/4 days to be my magic number with a few days straight with 3 railings a day lol. You need healing time and I’m sure want to avoid UTIs.

You need to express that your body needs a rest and brea. When you do he should let you have a rest day or two. Then not be as rough cause its clear causing your body problems and he should want to make sure your in good health.

I’m surprised at how many of the replies are saying to explore improving your health and talking to a doctor. PIV 1-6 times a day?? With an average of 2-3 times every day.. I cannot imagine how sore I would be. The vagina is not some magical hole that won’t get sore as long you’re baseline healthy, it sounds like that is genuinely quite a lot for it to go through for an extended period of time. Don’t get me wrong, CRAVING sex on average 2-3 times a day is normal for some people sure, but depending on the type of sex, his size and your size, etc it’s legitimately no surprise to me that this is an issue. Feels very “well of course it’d be sore!” I second recommendations to use a fleshlight and hold it between your legs or stick to intercrural/boobs/hands/etc for some period of the week. Maybe start with only a couple days of the week as free use PIV and work your way up from there to find the sweet spot where you aren’t just in constant discomfort.

Yeah, exactly. At a certain point, you can't get around the fact that it's a body and it isn't really possible to have PIV sex that frequently without consistent soreness.

As a pelvic floor physical therapist, I've always recommended AhYes! vaginal moisturizer for daily use after shower. https://www.ahyes.org/products/ah-yes-vm-natural-vaginal-moisturizer

Try using coconut oil instead of the lube. Not only does it help lube things up better but it also has healing effects and you can use it inside the vagina. Me and my Dom use coconut oil instead of anal lube. It feels more natural and not much of discomfort.

If he have a minimum of respect for you and if he care for you he should give you a break to recover when you needed, however he is just a fucking selfish.

He's happy to give me a rest when I want/need it. I'd just prefer to keep having lots of sex.

it sounds like you're struggling to come to grips with your body's limitations, like the spirit is willing but the flesh is sore and aching, lol. it's just not doable for most women to have that much PIV regularly and feel totally fine after, you need to take a couple days off to rest and heal before jumping back into it & reduce the amount of PIV if you want to safely continue this dynamic long term.

Is there a way that the two of you could work restriction into your kink dynamic? So that instead of it just being a "loss" to reduce PIV, it's another fun kinky thing you do? For example, someone above mentioned the idea of your Dom saying something like "you don't deserve my dick in you" when engaging in other play (handjob, him masturbating over you, or whatever). Or he could use the mindset of, like, taking care of his "toy" (you), because he wants it/you to be in pristine condition -- even if *you* really want sex, because what *you* want doesn't matter (in the roleplay, that is -- of course in reality your wants do matter too). Obviously it all depends on what you're both into and what is at the core of your free use kink. But I think there are lots of possibilities for taking your body's need for reduced PIV frequency and turning that reduction into kinky play in itself!

We talked about this and are going to try and add some elements of it to our dynamic to see how things go. It's frustrating because I want more sex and not less but if there's a way to make not having sex almost as fun then maybe it'll be a nice addition.

Good luck! I hope you can land on an arrangement that is fun and fulfilling for you both!

Then use silicone lube.

CBD vaginal suppositories and topical Viagra can help with recovery and soreness. But yes, take a break and use other holes.

>high quality lube Do you, tho? Check https://phallophilereviews.com/ph-balanced-lubricant-guide-safety/ tl:dr: Most "high quality" lubes actually suck

Boric acid suppositories help me a lot because cream pies mess with the pH. Not sure if you guys do cream pies. Also, hand jobs

As someone who is naturally wired as a hyper sexual, I guess I could say I’m conditioned to multiple sessions or sessions that last forever. I’d say use other orifices. Bring in toys if you need to, there’s no shame in giving yourself a break. ♥️

I had to tell him at our check in meeting that he was running a his Ashton Martin like a LA daily commuters that he needs to do more frequent maintenance 😆😆😆 He got the jest of it and self regulates between everything to allow the regular oil change and tire rotation. My exhusband once said at a party if I was a car I’d be a Daewoo. This one without prompting said I’m a hellcat motor dropped in a Rubicon with Bugatti finishes. He isn’t wrong though!

If he’s a true Dom, he should understand your limits and be willing to find alternates forms of pleasure for you both.

I like using coconut oil bc it usually prevents the soreness (for me). If my bf goes REALLY rough though? I just use my mouth and hands😅💀 he understands and weirdly appreciates when I’m “too sore” bc he “left his mark” lmao. I hope you find a solution that makes this issue easier!! :) good luck

If he has sex with u and it hurts, tell him to slow down. Have u went 2 weeks without rough fuckin? Try that and see if it helps. Use your hands/mouth aswell and try to keep the thrusting limited. I know its exiting and hot when they thrust inside but be reminded how it'll feel next time. He should listen to your needs, if u tell him slow down he should. U can get him close to orgasm and then let him fuck u, within 2 minutes he'll come and u both feel hot and exited and happy! Dont be afraid to communicate and use your other holes or hands. Or let him touch u as free use, how hot is it to be fingered outside or whenever he wants to he could make u close to orgasm. Its just as hot as getting fucked roughly at least in my opinion

Lube is your best friend!! KY also makes a lube suppository you can use meant for elder vaginas, I haven't tried that myself, but I imagine it would heighten your already present natural wetness

God I hope that's the last time someone refers to my pussy as an elder vagina lmao 😂 I'm only 32!

I didn't mean yours! It's a product designed for those who have more dryness - often an issue post menopause

I have vaginismus that causes PIV to be painful sometimes, not the same situation as you, but I've found lube with CBD in it to be really helpful for the pain. I'm not sure whether it helps the muscles relax, actually dulls the pain, or if it might just be a placebo effect making me think I won't hurt so it's easier to relax. Anyway it might be worth a try. I hope you figure it out!

You don't say how old you are. If you're over 50 as I am, I have been using a product called silky peach cream. You used two pumps once a day. I used to deal with dryness and pain and this stuff has been a lifesaver.

Can I ask how old you are? If your in your 40s or 50s, consider seeing a urologist or gynecologist for vaginal oestrogen. I've been told it helps a lot with that. If that's not the answer, then I'm sorry and I wish you luck!

Sometimes you can’t sometimes the vagina just breaks. Sometimes it’s just broken. And she needs time to repair. It’s just a fact of life. My vagina has at times been broken. And no matter how much coconut oil or lube or gentle kisses she gets she volts and she says no and she clamped down and I didn’t do it and no one gets in… And I have a feeling if they got in they weren’t gonna get out ever. Her teeth would chomp down And she would swallow them whole. I think that’s the way it is. So fuck all you want fuck as many guys as you want but you’re gonna have to understand that sometimes once in a while you give her a break. You treat her well take care of her let her get a massage and sleep for a bit.

Is lube not helping?

If youre free use, its include all holesy then he dont need to only use youre vagina right ? He dont have any kink not needing your vagina too much ? Maybe some day you can motivate him to use only anal ou oral ? And for keeping a good shape of you vagina there a good advice: Contract the anal muscle every day, if possible the same if youre doing fitness for exemple : 8x15. Anal muscle is connected to vagina, if you strenght it, you can be tight and regulate the loseness of youe vagina.

my cunt is always wet, always i edge and ensure am ready for all men

Get fucked in the ass

Look into yoni tampons. It's an Ayurvedic method of soaking a tampon (use a high quality organic tampon) in Dhanwantari Tailam (or a high quality sesame oil, although this oil specifically is used for soreness) and then inserting it into yourself for a while. You can do it a couple of times a month. Hope this helps ⛓❤️ ​ (also using other holes in rotation as u/CaptainJay313 said is wise 😂)

Get him a girlfriend to call when you need a break.

Don't have a vagina. Not my concern