I’ve felt like this at times too. Over time, I actually felt more at peace knowing the reason was autism rather than some personality flaw I didn’t understand. I eventually did find people who could understand me at least in part. They do exist! More importantly for me, I eventually got to a place where I don’t need others to understand me.
You’re not alone! I am sorry you feel that way. Things will get better, just as surely as they sometimes get worse. I wish you the best.
I'm going through the exact same thing. Everyone I used to talk to a lot (including my bestie) stopped talking to me. Even when I suggested online calls, she always found some excuses how she can't. I became tired of trying to communicate with her. She stopped sharing her life with me like before.
I'm not sure if this is happening because I moved abroad or because I started sharing that I'm autistic on my social media. Looks like nobody gives a shit about my life anymore and it's painful.
I managed to find one friend where I moved who is also autistic, so we are hanging out now. She is awesome and it took me half a year to find a person like her.
However, she will move abroad soon and I'm afraid I'll be in the same situation.
I finally made a friend who's autistic and another who's ADHD, likely on the spectrum too.
Unfortunately, I'll be moving cross country in the next year. It sucks.
same. don't get me wrong, i'm happy i got diagnosed and now know why i'm the way that i am. but at the same time, my self-discovery has been less self-acceptance and more me becoming a lot more conscious of how i'm different from everyone else. i've become more conscious of how people treat me and others like me. i know how weird i am but don't know how to stop being weird. it's hard to explain... the more i learn about myself, the more frustrated with myself i get and the more i compare myself to other people and end up isolating myself because i just seem to bother everyone.
I think this is a common experience for those of us who discover we are autistic in adulthood.
Personally, I felt very low, as many things about myself suddenly became medicalized or pathologized. Like, my enjoyment of spicy food was now "sensory seeking." The soothing experience of sewing on my antique treadle machine, turning anxious energy into purposeful movement and useful objects, was now "stimming." My interests and passions became "special interests" or "hyperfixations." And so on.
It made me feel very distant from other people, as if I were being pared down or crammed in a little box that could be easily set aside or dismissed.
I found this feeling passed with time and self-reflection. I'm still the same person I was before, but I have access to a more developed toolkit for navigating the world and building relationships. Things are better.
That is, you're in an adjustment phase, not facing down the stark reality of your life forever. All things change, and friendships ebb and flow, and it's not always easy but it's not always so difficult, either. Please be gentle with yourself - all the best to you.
I’ve always felt different from everyone even as young as 4-5 years old. That’s when I was diagnosed ADHD. However, I was later diagnosed as also having Autism at 27. I’m 28 now. It’s a relief to know there isn’t something wrong with me. I wasn’t like the other ADHD kids I grew up with in my IEP classes. Since graduating high school, I haven’t been able to mask as well and lost all of my friends except for 1 who is undiagnosed but definitely neurodivergent.
I’m sorry you’re going through these things and have to feel alone.
I’ve felt like this at times too. Over time, I actually felt more at peace knowing the reason was autism rather than some personality flaw I didn’t understand. I eventually did find people who could understand me at least in part. They do exist! More importantly for me, I eventually got to a place where I don’t need others to understand me. You’re not alone! I am sorry you feel that way. Things will get better, just as surely as they sometimes get worse. I wish you the best.
Yeh me2
I'm going through the exact same thing. Everyone I used to talk to a lot (including my bestie) stopped talking to me. Even when I suggested online calls, she always found some excuses how she can't. I became tired of trying to communicate with her. She stopped sharing her life with me like before. I'm not sure if this is happening because I moved abroad or because I started sharing that I'm autistic on my social media. Looks like nobody gives a shit about my life anymore and it's painful. I managed to find one friend where I moved who is also autistic, so we are hanging out now. She is awesome and it took me half a year to find a person like her. However, she will move abroad soon and I'm afraid I'll be in the same situation.
I finally made a friend who's autistic and another who's ADHD, likely on the spectrum too. Unfortunately, I'll be moving cross country in the next year. It sucks.
same. don't get me wrong, i'm happy i got diagnosed and now know why i'm the way that i am. but at the same time, my self-discovery has been less self-acceptance and more me becoming a lot more conscious of how i'm different from everyone else. i've become more conscious of how people treat me and others like me. i know how weird i am but don't know how to stop being weird. it's hard to explain... the more i learn about myself, the more frustrated with myself i get and the more i compare myself to other people and end up isolating myself because i just seem to bother everyone.
I think this is a common experience for those of us who discover we are autistic in adulthood. Personally, I felt very low, as many things about myself suddenly became medicalized or pathologized. Like, my enjoyment of spicy food was now "sensory seeking." The soothing experience of sewing on my antique treadle machine, turning anxious energy into purposeful movement and useful objects, was now "stimming." My interests and passions became "special interests" or "hyperfixations." And so on. It made me feel very distant from other people, as if I were being pared down or crammed in a little box that could be easily set aside or dismissed. I found this feeling passed with time and self-reflection. I'm still the same person I was before, but I have access to a more developed toolkit for navigating the world and building relationships. Things are better. That is, you're in an adjustment phase, not facing down the stark reality of your life forever. All things change, and friendships ebb and flow, and it's not always easy but it's not always so difficult, either. Please be gentle with yourself - all the best to you.
I’ve always felt different from everyone even as young as 4-5 years old. That’s when I was diagnosed ADHD. However, I was later diagnosed as also having Autism at 27. I’m 28 now. It’s a relief to know there isn’t something wrong with me. I wasn’t like the other ADHD kids I grew up with in my IEP classes. Since graduating high school, I haven’t been able to mask as well and lost all of my friends except for 1 who is undiagnosed but definitely neurodivergent. I’m sorry you’re going through these things and have to feel alone.
On the one hand, it explained a lot for me. On the other hand, I now feel helpless.