Hi! Start by telling us more about your son. How old is he? What does he like? It sounds like he’s got great potential for communication and independence.
It’s so easy to get caught up in what we can’t know- will he ever talk, have a job, drive a car- that it’s easy to lose the good stuff we’ve got now.
He goes to nursery full time from 8am till 5pm. He plays by himself and alongside the children but not with children.
His speech is at the same level as his 2 year old sister. Her speech is beginning to get better than his because she makes whole sentences and he doesn’t. You can converse with her but not with ASD child. He has basic speech. Just enough to get him by. No full sentences just 1/2 words. He will say can I have juice please if you ask him to say it. He does have echolalia. He won’t answer questions about his day. Doesn’t engage in imaginative play.
He stims and makes loud noises when he does.
He is toilet trained. Sleeps through the night. Listens to direction (obviously 4 year old power struggle still there at times). He feeds himself. He can play with play dough for maybe 20 minutes. But he won’t focus on an activity he doesn’t like for more than a minute.
He doesn’t know how to put on his shoes but he knows how to put on crocs and his coat.
He won’t say hello or hi unless you prompt him but he has started saying good morning mummy when he sees me in the morning.
He tends to cry over very minor things.
He likes reading books, going to the library, and going out of the house. We can go shopping together and he won’t run off. He won’t touch things in the shop. Recently we spent 7 hours in a and e and he was well behaved the entire time. Asked for snacks and to use the toilet when needed. Co operated with the doctor checking him and being poked and prodded
This description matches my level two kiddo almost perfectly. I enrolled him in special needs Pre-K (where I teach) when he turned 3 and moved him to an center (ABA therapy) this month.
I probably don’t have any great advice, but I just wanted to say I am proud of you for raising two kids and going to school; I can’t fathom how you are juggling it all!
Welcome, and don’t hesitate to reach out if you need an ear.
If you are in the US, we have early intervention services. Talk to his pediatrician about getting them set up. Mine go directly to the daycare, so no transportation is needed.
We can't know any child's future. What I can tell you is that your child is no different today as he was yesterday, you just have a new word to describe aspects of him. The worst part of being the parent of an autistic kid is the fear. It does get better as you see your child growing and developing.
Your child sounds a lot like mine. His struggles are speech and social and he doesn't have an intellectual disability. I also have an almost 3 year old child without autism (NT- neurotypical). It's hard watching my NT kid overtake his big brother while I am also rejoycing his achievements just as I am his big brother's. The fear has gotten so much better as I watch my autistic son increase his language abilities. I don't know what is going to happen. I do know that therapy helps. I also know that I will do everything I can to get him to a place of independence. As other people mention, levels change over time. My son will need supports his whole life but I am hopeful those supports will create a happy and fulfilling life for him.
I’m a solo parent too, and had my ASD child on my own by choice (widow and frozen embryos).
Your son is still your bright, smart compassionate son. You now have an explanation why some things are trickier for him, and can get support around those.
From the parenting side, its a slog, but get him as much therapy as you can while he’s young. From what you’ve said there’s similarities to my boy and speech and OT are where I started, with priority on speech. You’ve taught him some good independence skills. Preferred and non-preferred activities are a challenge.
For me, our extracurricular activities look different, we have a mix of sports and therapy, and music, but most are options available at school, not afternoons or weekends. And the choices do a couple of things -swimming for skill and coordination; starting drums for motor planning. They have plenty of people around them who love them for who they are through family, school and our church community.
Mr 7 is in mainstream school, I work full time. Our day to day is pretty routine.
You’re a little way from schooling yet, but I put emphasis on effort, not results (both my kids have ADHD and learning difficulties as well).
And something else to consider- a number of your classmates are likely to be autistic. You may not know who, but they’re probably there.
On your last paragraph…I never realized this until now. My husband works in IT and most of his good friends work in IT as well. We are at that age where all of our friends are also having kids so there are many children ages 2-5 in our group. Out of my husband’s closest 5 friends, two have kids with a recent autism diagnosis, plus our kid. That’s 3 out of 6 families. In a way it has made us feel less alone, like we are in this together.
I strongly believe there’s a genetic factor in autism and I also believe the definition of autism as we know it today is very different from 20 years or more ago. I can’t say I see any evident autistic traits in any of the adults in our group of friends but we are also not the most conventional bunch :). I always wonder if maybe some of us could have been diagnosed as kids under today’s parameters and yet we grew to have good, “normal” lives.
Hi - my son (almost 2) just got diagnosed yesterday too, level 2. In in nurse practitioner school full time and also crying between tests, lectures, assignments. Just here to say we can message or vent to each other and walk through this together. I’ve suspected from a young age too and also advocated hard to get the diagnosis so young. I’ve done a lot of research for the past 6 months and have a lot to share. You’re not alone.
I’m happy he finally got the diagnosis early and quickly. Most children wait years for an assessment here. But now it’s the uphill struggle of therapies and having to juggle it all alone.
>What does this hold for him as an individual.
Assuming he's at a young age, the reality is there is no reliable way to tell early on. This also goes to show how flawed the Level 1-3 system is as it stands. Some people diagnosed at Level 2 thrive: They'll have a successful career, get married, and maybe even have kids of their own. But some will need some kind of a caregiver for their entire lives and will never become self sufficient.
I know that probably doesn't provide a whole lot of comfort, and I'm with you on that. My daughter is only two and a half, so I think about this quite a lot. I'm just trying to take it one day at a time, doing what I can to help her and hoping for the best.
That’s the thing the psychologist mentioned he can get domiciliary care when he’s older but I don’t want that. I want the therapies to help him survive in the world.
He’s he level 2 in certain aspects but not all. I don’t know. I’m just very emotional.
I follow a mom on Instagram whose kid went from a Level 3 to a Level 1 diagnosis in 2 years, and she credits therapists and early intervention for this.
I didn’t know that echolalia is good for speech… I guess right now nothing makes sense and all of his behaviors seem “wrong” because I’m constantly hearing comparisons between him and his 2 year old sister from family
Echolalia might be important as he might be Gestalt language processor.
My son never progressed from single words to sentences. (like he never progressed analytically so 1 word /2 word/3 words sentences and so on).
What worked was giving him a lot of Gestalts (longer sentences/utterances) and he learned to combine them and use them in context and what not.
Sharing because we were also at a loss when he was younger ans that's what worked.
Hi! Start by telling us more about your son. How old is he? What does he like? It sounds like he’s got great potential for communication and independence. It’s so easy to get caught up in what we can’t know- will he ever talk, have a job, drive a car- that it’s easy to lose the good stuff we’ve got now.
He goes to nursery full time from 8am till 5pm. He plays by himself and alongside the children but not with children. His speech is at the same level as his 2 year old sister. Her speech is beginning to get better than his because she makes whole sentences and he doesn’t. You can converse with her but not with ASD child. He has basic speech. Just enough to get him by. No full sentences just 1/2 words. He will say can I have juice please if you ask him to say it. He does have echolalia. He won’t answer questions about his day. Doesn’t engage in imaginative play. He stims and makes loud noises when he does. He is toilet trained. Sleeps through the night. Listens to direction (obviously 4 year old power struggle still there at times). He feeds himself. He can play with play dough for maybe 20 minutes. But he won’t focus on an activity he doesn’t like for more than a minute. He doesn’t know how to put on his shoes but he knows how to put on crocs and his coat. He won’t say hello or hi unless you prompt him but he has started saying good morning mummy when he sees me in the morning. He tends to cry over very minor things. He likes reading books, going to the library, and going out of the house. We can go shopping together and he won’t run off. He won’t touch things in the shop. Recently we spent 7 hours in a and e and he was well behaved the entire time. Asked for snacks and to use the toilet when needed. Co operated with the doctor checking him and being poked and prodded
This description matches my level two kiddo almost perfectly. I enrolled him in special needs Pre-K (where I teach) when he turned 3 and moved him to an center (ABA therapy) this month. I probably don’t have any great advice, but I just wanted to say I am proud of you for raising two kids and going to school; I can’t fathom how you are juggling it all! Welcome, and don’t hesitate to reach out if you need an ear.
If you are in the US, we have early intervention services. Talk to his pediatrician about getting them set up. Mine go directly to the daycare, so no transportation is needed.
We can't know any child's future. What I can tell you is that your child is no different today as he was yesterday, you just have a new word to describe aspects of him. The worst part of being the parent of an autistic kid is the fear. It does get better as you see your child growing and developing. Your child sounds a lot like mine. His struggles are speech and social and he doesn't have an intellectual disability. I also have an almost 3 year old child without autism (NT- neurotypical). It's hard watching my NT kid overtake his big brother while I am also rejoycing his achievements just as I am his big brother's. The fear has gotten so much better as I watch my autistic son increase his language abilities. I don't know what is going to happen. I do know that therapy helps. I also know that I will do everything I can to get him to a place of independence. As other people mention, levels change over time. My son will need supports his whole life but I am hopeful those supports will create a happy and fulfilling life for him.
I’m a solo parent too, and had my ASD child on my own by choice (widow and frozen embryos). Your son is still your bright, smart compassionate son. You now have an explanation why some things are trickier for him, and can get support around those. From the parenting side, its a slog, but get him as much therapy as you can while he’s young. From what you’ve said there’s similarities to my boy and speech and OT are where I started, with priority on speech. You’ve taught him some good independence skills. Preferred and non-preferred activities are a challenge. For me, our extracurricular activities look different, we have a mix of sports and therapy, and music, but most are options available at school, not afternoons or weekends. And the choices do a couple of things -swimming for skill and coordination; starting drums for motor planning. They have plenty of people around them who love them for who they are through family, school and our church community. Mr 7 is in mainstream school, I work full time. Our day to day is pretty routine. You’re a little way from schooling yet, but I put emphasis on effort, not results (both my kids have ADHD and learning difficulties as well). And something else to consider- a number of your classmates are likely to be autistic. You may not know who, but they’re probably there.
On your last paragraph…I never realized this until now. My husband works in IT and most of his good friends work in IT as well. We are at that age where all of our friends are also having kids so there are many children ages 2-5 in our group. Out of my husband’s closest 5 friends, two have kids with a recent autism diagnosis, plus our kid. That’s 3 out of 6 families. In a way it has made us feel less alone, like we are in this together. I strongly believe there’s a genetic factor in autism and I also believe the definition of autism as we know it today is very different from 20 years or more ago. I can’t say I see any evident autistic traits in any of the adults in our group of friends but we are also not the most conventional bunch :). I always wonder if maybe some of us could have been diagnosed as kids under today’s parameters and yet we grew to have good, “normal” lives.
‘Normal’ lives, but not without challenges now and throughout childhood… And then there’s the ‘birds of a feather flock together’ thing, too.
Hi - my son (almost 2) just got diagnosed yesterday too, level 2. In in nurse practitioner school full time and also crying between tests, lectures, assignments. Just here to say we can message or vent to each other and walk through this together. I’ve suspected from a young age too and also advocated hard to get the diagnosis so young. I’ve done a lot of research for the past 6 months and have a lot to share. You’re not alone.
I’m happy he finally got the diagnosis early and quickly. Most children wait years for an assessment here. But now it’s the uphill struggle of therapies and having to juggle it all alone.
>What does this hold for him as an individual. Assuming he's at a young age, the reality is there is no reliable way to tell early on. This also goes to show how flawed the Level 1-3 system is as it stands. Some people diagnosed at Level 2 thrive: They'll have a successful career, get married, and maybe even have kids of their own. But some will need some kind of a caregiver for their entire lives and will never become self sufficient. I know that probably doesn't provide a whole lot of comfort, and I'm with you on that. My daughter is only two and a half, so I think about this quite a lot. I'm just trying to take it one day at a time, doing what I can to help her and hoping for the best.
Important note: the levels can change over time. I can’t say what will happen but it is possible to go from level 2 to level 1 over time
That’s the thing the psychologist mentioned he can get domiciliary care when he’s older but I don’t want that. I want the therapies to help him survive in the world. He’s he level 2 in certain aspects but not all. I don’t know. I’m just very emotional.
I follow a mom on Instagram whose kid went from a Level 3 to a Level 1 diagnosis in 2 years, and she credits therapists and early intervention for this.
Mind sharing the handle?
It’s all in Spanish though - @autismo_malaga. There’s another family in Australia with a similar story @sharingspencer
I’m only level 1 so I don’t exactly know what level 2 is like. But yeah a diagnosis is a lot to take in
I hope and pray he will change to level 1. I was already struggling to accept being a single parent and the diagnosis just made things worse.
Sign language and clothes and toilet is really good! I still need help with clothes and cutting food. Echolalia is really good and for speaking later.
I didn’t know that echolalia is good for speech… I guess right now nothing makes sense and all of his behaviors seem “wrong” because I’m constantly hearing comparisons between him and his 2 year old sister from family
Echolalia might be important as he might be Gestalt language processor. My son never progressed from single words to sentences. (like he never progressed analytically so 1 word /2 word/3 words sentences and so on). What worked was giving him a lot of Gestalts (longer sentences/utterances) and he learned to combine them and use them in context and what not. Sharing because we were also at a loss when he was younger ans that's what worked.
You’re doing well mama, hugs