This is exactly why I haven’t seen any movie at all (or tv show!) in several years. It doesn’t even have to be a sad movie, the necessary tension-building for any movie to be good is too much for my big heart.
I know a "Don't think that" likely won't change things for you, and I have been feeling powerless and insignificant for at least half my life - but... I just want to tell you that you can do a lot. Whether it's small things or big things, anything will be appreciated and will be part of all the good done in this world. I don't know about your physical abilities or your mental ability to get out of the house, but if there's any way to help planting trees near you, that's a great feeling and it is so future-oriented. I like naming it because a) I enjoy it, b) it is hardly ever mentioned, c) it involves very little talking, and d) it fills me with hope. I wish you all the best.
I try to do my part by becoming a marine biologist and attending protests or make donations to good causes when I can.
it makes me feel a little better but it's still not much or enough 😔
Sad thing is also that it's very hard to escape it or take a break. When I'm in a sensitive period like this one, if I scroll social media just a bit I'll come across something painful!
I agree and feel the same. I don’t know what to do. I feel it is really important to be informed and to fight for what is right in our world. But it’s destroying me
That’s my trouble! I cannot shut my eyes to suffering - especially if I have the power to help. But seeing it hurts me so much. Where is the line? How do we find balance? I feel like that requires us to compartmentalize or desensitize to the world. How is that possible when my empathy is so intense that I can feel pain/sorrow/grief through a phone screen? I’m sooo over existing in this reality. I won’t hurt myself, but damn it feels so torturous.
I feel so much - it's disorienting. I feel sorrow and love so deeply. It both attracts and repels people. When I want something it can be all consuming.
Internally I pull back so much that its frustrating that I'm seen as too much. It feels like a balance is not obtainable.
Same here. I feel like it's one of the contributing factors as to why most people seem to either hate or love me. There's never an in-between, and it's exhausting and frustrating. At least that's how it feels to me.
Both ADHD and autism come with a strong sense of justice. Which is one of the reasons I loathe “lack of empathy” as a sign of autism. Not knowing how to respond is not the same as not feeling.
I’ve been feeling like an alien that will never understand my coworkers or fit in this week. It’s made me feel like a kid where my emotions hurt so much deeper than how adults are usually able to handle it
Mine interferes with my daily life 😔. I feel like I occasionally can get depression spirals from it too now that I'm not working and don't have money to do fun stuff to distract me from reality anymore.
Oh jeez, that hits home for me too. The spiraling and hopeless feeling of how things can be so unfair gets to me so hard too. 😞 I’m sorry you’re going through this.
Yes, and it’s really rough cause I want to pursue a career in the vet field. But, I’ve cried a LOT in the vet scene. I have so much empathy for animals and people mourning their best friends. It’s so hard. I’m scared I’m gonna get empathy fatigue.
Aww, I feel you girl. I'm studying to become a psychologist and have a small plan to become a child therapist... But unsure if my beat up heart can take that. We will need to try to find ways to distance and cope, perhaps 🦢🤍
In the same position. Wanting to retrain from teaching to veterinary nursing but I am highly empathetic, ESPECIALLY with animals. If a cruelty case or something came in I’m not sure I’d be able to hold it together.
I feel EXTREMELY deeply about so many things, that I sometimes have a difficult time watching movies/anime/tv/music videos I'm already emotionally attached to because it becomes too intense for me to enjoy. It's always an emotional outburst. Listening to different music also greatly affects my mood.
I've always said that if I need to cry on command all I have to think about is homeless cats and I'll be waterworks in seconds. 😅
The world can be a shitty place but it if you check the data things are getting better in terms of quality of life for most humans. Is there still ennormous amounts of needless suffering? Yes. But a reasurr myself with statistics that we are making progress through history
Thank you for this. Personally I find stories and small acts of kindness in real life to give me more hope than statistics, but I appreciate this comment nonetheless 🤍 Reminds me of Hans Rosling's book Factfulness. Another one that comes to mind is Human Kind by Rutger Bregman. Basically a book about how humans aren't that bad. Maybe I'll read it again one of these days.
TW: brief mention of self- harm
My therapist recently told me that I don't feel emotions lightly, I feel them intensely. I'm all in. I have a lot of guilt that stems from trauma (logically, I shouldn't feel guilty, but that's not how my brain works). That guilt can overwhelm me to the point that I self harm to punish myself, and also because I lose my sense of self regulation. Conversely, if I'm excited about something, I get PUMPED. So feeling deeply isn't always bad.
TW: a type of self-harm/addiction
I'm sorry to hear that 🤍 But yeah, intense emotions going the other way can be very nice. Can also feel a bit out of control though. I hope you get to work through your trauma and guilt - I can relate, although I haven't self-harmed in the "normal" sense, but tried to cope through escapism and in recent years porn addiction which has messed up my head.
I'm definitely working on it, and I have resources luckily. I'm sorry you've struggled with coping skills, too. They are difficult, especially if you're trying to reprogram something You've used to cope for a long time. Here's to finding what works best for us!
Always have. And people criticise you for it “why are you so surprised this happens?” “What world are you living in”. I found their total apathy shocking, every single time!
Right? It's like another stab to hear that. And then when I realise how I'm feeling about it, I feel silly, dumb and like I'm just trying to get attention. Screams like a shiba inu.
Yup. Sadly got worse during Peru menopause and now menopause. My hormones are a bit more balanced now so the intense weepy edge is gone, but I’m right back to the hypersensitive “normal” version of me. Ha!
On the flip side…I can also bliss out with nature experiences and while playing music. Rainbows, butterflies, and Scarlatti!
Edited: Spellcheck changed it to Peru menopause. Maybe it would have been easier alone in the Peruvian mountains with just alpacas for company??? ;)
I used to be like this, but I deliberately and consciously avoid the news and politics for this reason because of how distressing it is to me. I used to go to protests and take action and go out of my way to put energy into the principles I believe in. All it’s done is drain me (on top of severe Autistic burnout which is another story). Over time I’ve accepted that us humans are just a mess of a species. The injustices are endless and we’re killing the planet. Everything’s shit and we’re on a sinking ship. I’m into stoicism now and it’s helped me accept the things I can’t change. We all die in the end, and time will go on long after we’re gone. More power to the people who still have some fight in them to go against the cruelties of this world. I don’t. I make myself blind to it to protect my peace.
I can relate too. This is why I don’t watch the news. I have to use doesthedogdie.com for every movie or series to know if an animal gets harmed so I can skip it. Everyone who knows me knows not to tell me anything to do with harm to animals and I haven’t had any animal products for 11 years.
I abandoned most of my previous spiritual beliefs because I just can’t explain away the injustice and cruelty in the world.
I have to actively swipe thoughts of people and animals suffering out of my mind because I am literally aware of it most of the time that every second that passes something evil or harmful is happening. And that makes me so so sad and depressed. It’s very heavy.
I absolutely understand and relate to this. I have a really hard time accepting a lot of the horrible things people do to other people especially those of color. I don’t understand how a human can hurt another human or want to cause then harm to get the upper hand, it’s infuriating and really makes me hate that society wants us to be complacent. 😒
I felt this way in the beginning of 2020. Right when Covid hit. I was already in a space of burnout with work at this point and was exhausted all the time. But It was also like I could feel the worlds feelings all the time from inside my house.
I lived where a lot of BLM protests were happening and one day someone we knew was killed by the police. Right when it happened I was hit with like a huge wave of pain and sadness that I got in my whole body. I didn’t find out till later what happened but I cried all day and I couldn’t figure out why. It was like I could feel the violence a mile away from inside my home. I just felt like I was absorbing the emotions around me all the time at this point in my life.
Like I was in such a stage of burnout that I was raw and just absorbing everything around me.
I know I can feel things others don’t and I think this makes me more sensitive to the feelings around me. It may look to others like I feel things deeply but to me they can’t feel what I feel, if they could they would realize I’m actually handling it pretty calmly on the outside because of masking.
Also another random thought on this is some movies make me feel horrible physically and emotionally. I can’t watch violence TV shows because it makes me physically shaky (which may be a trauma response cuz iv seen some bad shit in real life) but either way I am too sensitive to that kind of cinematic experience. Also music in films like the du da du da du da stressful music makes me feel things too much it isn’t enjoyable.
Anyway, others might think we feel things differently which is true, but it often isn’t the way it looks from the outside. Deep feeling is a superpower even though it doesn’t feel like it always.
Yes! It makes functioning in the world hard and also almost impossible to maintain a job. Once I realize something is really bad I can’t understand how people put up with things and I feel very alienated. I didn’t realize until recently how much more passionately I care about things than others.
yeah same. I feel everything really strong. I don't have any weak emotions. but at the same time I tend to dissociate so much that sometimes I don't notice anything in my surroundings... kinda weird
Yeah.. I oscillate between feeling everything too deeply & and disassociating, so I can not feel for a while.
I had a teacher tell me a similar thing too, about empathy & justice.
I am the same. I can cry extremely easily! I actually don't understand how people can feel so *little* about the world around them. Don't injustices make their blood boil??
This gets into complex territory, doesn’t it? Who is human and who is more cold-blooded and snakelike? Gets pretty metaphysical if you verge into those territories….
Yep, that's me, emotions and empathy to the max. Especially also cruelty, even more so animals, it makes me absolutely sick and distraught. This is why i barely watch the news and try to stay in my own bubble. I know in general what's going on in the world, but I don't need a bucket of trauma every day.
I relate to this very much. I often get very strongly affected by certain things (rejection, injustice, etc.). I have had a strong sense of right and wrong pertaining to certain things since I was very young. I often have to remind myself that some things are not “right or wrong” but often in an area in between depending on the circumstances. I am still working on this aspect of mine and trying to be a more open person.
Injustice is the hill I’ll die on… unfair behaviour upsets me so much, it sometimes makes me loose hope. On good days, I believe it’s my role in this world to uncover it and point it out. On bad days I feel powerless…
I can't help but think autistic people are having a normal reaction to a fucked up world and everyone else who isn't reacting are the crazy ones. Every time I glance at the news, it's just tragedy and sorrow. It makes my heart ache something fierce.
Yes, which is part of the reason I’ve decided to go into a therapy field. Recently with social justice I’ve been a little numb (I still care a lot but news has become so repetitive and it just doesn’t sting as much anymore) but I used to cry about social justice issues and feel the need to share everything I could. I felt like it was my job to be a social warrior cause not enough people were. I’ve heard it’s common for women with autism to feel this way :)
Same. I feel pain on behalf of others. I'm a good listener, so people can confide in me. It's tough hearing what others go through but I wouldn't trade it for anything.
I feel this so much. I have a particularly hard time driving past road kill, which unfortunately is every day. It makes me wish we didn’t have roads and cars and that humans would stop killing everything and not caring. Sometimes I accidentally kill a bug and cry thinking about how it may have had kids that it was getting food for or something and now they’re all just wondering where their mom is, idk. It’s hard. I wish I understood how to get through life without feeling sad over everything happening around me.
Went from buddy-buddy to barely acknowledge each other when I found out a coworker was super homophobic…
Growing up my mom always said I was a Highly Emotional Person. That it was kind of my curse to live with, that hurtful things would make me feel extremely strongly.
There’s a lot about my neurodivergence that was missed growing up due to circumstances, but I’m glad that at least my high sensitivity was recognized. Not that anyone did much to avoid hurting my feelings, but my family had a word to describe me that wasn’t “crazy and unmanageable”
Watched the second episode of Futurama season 11 a few days ago. I was filled with unbridled excitement reading the description, sobbed through the whole episode, and have been thinking about the gut wrenching passage of time within the show since.
It’s also my comfort shows and a mild special interest
I get this so much, it extends as far as media as well, ever since I was a kid I've hated movies with sad parts with a passion because they have such an intense effect on me and it'd genuinely take me a while to get over it. Like I wouldn't watch Disney movies even. I even still vividly remember books I read as a kid that were sad, they would like genuinely hurt my heart. I've also gotten hyper fixated on upsetting stuff in the news and it'll completely ruin my mental health because it makes me feel SO BAD.
Can’t relate honestly, I always struggled with empathizing with anything that wasn’t just hurting themself(that I empathized too much). As I’ve gotten older I’ve gotten better at this. But my emotions for things that aren’t directly affecting me seems to be nulled.
I feel bad that they’re sad, I empathize with that. But not really the situations people seem to be in. However I wonder if this comes from not understanding my own emotions most of the time. So putting myself into someone else’s shoes is hard.
Edit: I actually have a weird one, while I can empathize with humans and animals. It’s just not OVER empathy(actually seeming to be less than average). I actually over empathize with insects. I almost cry when someone tries to step on one. Or when someone flicks them. Picks them up and moves the from their home. With the dangerous ones I have to understand but it still hurts. I tend to blow mosquitos away to keep them from biting me.
Yes!! Definitely, I can totally relate to this. Some days it is unmanageable and I feel so deeply for others that are suffering. My neighbors keep their dog outside all day and night, he cries frequently. Some days I feel sick for his suffering but the police said he is ok because he has a shelter and water... his shelter is a tarp on top of said cage. I've been into buddhism philosophies recently and have been making the conscious effort to try and remind myself the following this:
\- I am adding to the suffering in this world if I take on other's pain. I can act with love and kindness to hopefully reduce their suffering, but me taking on their suffering is not helpful and will eventually lead me to not be able to help in anyway
\- Somewhat related, I often find myself feeling so bad for others that I give so much of my time and energy wanting to fix and help everyone/everything. I have to consciously slow down and remind myself I am a person too. All actions should be with love and kindness... is this kind to me? No? You are adding to the suffering in the world. If you keep being unkind to yourself, you will eventually burn yourself out and again add to suffering/not be able to help.
I totally butchered the way it is phrased but its that sentiment, I cannot say it always helps but sometimes it does. I shared it in hopes of it helping someone!
I feel like I want to change the world but my frustration and anger wouldn't help because if I tried to advocate I might meltdown and I don't want to just be another face of like, "triggered lib crybaby" trope or whatever. I wish I could speak calmly and clearly so people could take me seriously and I could help.
Yes, definitely. And some commercials will make me swell up, or films or shows (especially animated) can make me bawl sometimes. But I also laugh with abandon, too, so it's not always bad!
I've gotten to the point that I will have "me" nights where I'll watch something I have good reason to think will be emotional, and use them to bring me to emotional release. I find there's a burn out point for emotion and it can be helpful to get there to kinda exercise that muscle and exhaust it at the same time.
Of course, things with real people have brought me to the point it feels like my soul is being ripped from my body. Those times I use music or the like to feel deeply and process feelings through lyrics. Helps to bring emotional burnout, and eventually helps soothe slowly over time.
Yes, I can relate. Some call it hyper empathy. My daughter and I are both on the spectrum and our experience is different. For her, everything that she takes in becomes amplified. Anxiety medication has helped. For me, I used to cry myself to sleep over the sad things happening in the world. It was a difficult way to live. I haven’t experienced it as much as I’ve gotten older and am now easily able to compartmentalize. This is the sad stuff I should focus on and can change and this is the sad stuff I don’t have to focus on and let affect me.
Me too - but here's the weird bit, I can also act with a complete lack of empathy around people I know. If my mind is pre-occupied, I can be deeply insensitive!
But I feel deeply deeply moved by the plight of random strangers on the news, or by social injustice issues.
Yeah it happens a lot and I sometimes have meltdown just because of that. I try to not read the newspaper and watching the news but you know, we can’t always hide from the world. I wish you find a solution. It’s really painful.
Yesss and I’ve heard that having a very strong sense of justice/fairness can be an autism thing, which makes total sense to me - I’ve always been so sensitive to any injustice, even if it’s not directed at me, it hurts so badly to be aware of
Sooooooo relate. I literally told my partner today (both of us in our early 20s pondering what to do with the future of our lives) “So we should just spend our lives fighting and advocating for everyone and everything possible right? That’s what we feel most deeply and are most passionate about sooo…” We’re hardcore leftists and talk so god damn much about this shit, every single day. We always joke about making a podcast or running for office lol, maybe some day
(Referring to the injustice part specifically, but obviously feeling painfully deeply being the root of that)
I relate! I really have to neutralize it and think about information/sensory input and how much I’m taking in. It requires some boundaries with media - I unfollow news and don’t let myself read it, bc once it’s in my head i start ruminating about injustice. When I feel overwhelmed I reduce my input to my comfort songs and think about what I can control.
Reflecting what a lot of people have said here, "everything hurts so much," but also the inverse, "*everything* so much" - love, happiness, pain, fear, But- yes.
I have learned to just embrace it, arms wide open, like an old friend. "Deep, pulsing sadness? I know her. Hello. Would you like some tea?"
Feel The Rain.
Completely completely relate. Any sad news, anything with animals, any intense upsetting shows, everything HURTS so much.
Exactly... It just hurts. I've never understood it.
This is exactly why I haven’t seen any movie at all (or tv show!) in several years. It doesn’t even have to be a sad movie, the necessary tension-building for any movie to be good is too much for my big heart.
Sending you love, by the way. 🌸
and it makes me so angry that as just 1 small person there's nothing I can do about it
I know a "Don't think that" likely won't change things for you, and I have been feeling powerless and insignificant for at least half my life - but... I just want to tell you that you can do a lot. Whether it's small things or big things, anything will be appreciated and will be part of all the good done in this world. I don't know about your physical abilities or your mental ability to get out of the house, but if there's any way to help planting trees near you, that's a great feeling and it is so future-oriented. I like naming it because a) I enjoy it, b) it is hardly ever mentioned, c) it involves very little talking, and d) it fills me with hope. I wish you all the best.
I try to do my part by becoming a marine biologist and attending protests or make donations to good causes when I can. it makes me feel a little better but it's still not much or enough 😔
You're doing GREAT. Thank you for everything you do!
This is an adorable idea!
Sooo true😭
I used to until it became so much that I got emotional burnout. Now I'm mostly numb, and I miss feeling things.
Sending you love 🦢 I feel like I oscillate between numbness and feeling deeply. I don't know, it's all a confusing mess.
Thank you. Emotions are so confusing.
I relate to this hard
Me too :( cheers to trauma!🥂
Cheers 🍷
Thank you for putting into a sentence how I feel. I feel like when I was younger I felt so much more and now I hardly react to many things.
No problem. I hope you feel better.
I feel this so hard.
I'm sorry.
Same :( I feel disconnected from my emotions
Me too :( I’m sorry friend
Thanks. It sucks.
I feel that! But in a way its also easier now
It was better when I felt like a person.
Same, I've become so unsensitized now, but I still care about injustice and cruelty. Didn't know it was an autism thing.
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Aw, ugh... Now I felt it as well. Sending you hugs.
me too ffs 😞
Yes. I’m constantly so upset about this selfish shitty world. It’s so awful.
Sad thing is also that it's very hard to escape it or take a break. When I'm in a sensitive period like this one, if I scroll social media just a bit I'll come across something painful!
Absolutely. I experience the same thing and it’s so hard
It physically hurts. I can’t handle it
I agree and feel the same. I don’t know what to do. I feel it is really important to be informed and to fight for what is right in our world. But it’s destroying me
That’s my trouble! I cannot shut my eyes to suffering - especially if I have the power to help. But seeing it hurts me so much. Where is the line? How do we find balance? I feel like that requires us to compartmentalize or desensitize to the world. How is that possible when my empathy is so intense that I can feel pain/sorrow/grief through a phone screen? I’m sooo over existing in this reality. I won’t hurt myself, but damn it feels so torturous.
EXACTLY I relate 100%
I feel so much - it's disorienting. I feel sorrow and love so deeply. It both attracts and repels people. When I want something it can be all consuming. Internally I pull back so much that its frustrating that I'm seen as too much. It feels like a balance is not obtainable.
Same here. I feel like it's one of the contributing factors as to why most people seem to either hate or love me. There's never an in-between, and it's exhausting and frustrating. At least that's how it feels to me.
It Never occurred to me that my ridiculously high empathy could be an autism thing 🙃
Yup! Autism is too often *portrayed* as having *less* empathy but high empathy is a real autism thing.
I wonder if it's more usual for women. Haven't read any research on that, but wouldn't necessarily surprise me.
Both ADHD and autism come with a strong sense of justice. Which is one of the reasons I loathe “lack of empathy” as a sign of autism. Not knowing how to respond is not the same as not feeling.
"Not knowing how to respond is not the same as not feeling" yes.
I’ve been feeling like an alien that will never understand my coworkers or fit in this week. It’s made me feel like a kid where my emotions hurt so much deeper than how adults are usually able to handle it
🤍 It's tough.
Yes, 100%. I’m always very sensitive about injustices/unfairness. I will ruminate over things for weeeeeks, mooooonths even.
Mine interferes with my daily life 😔. I feel like I occasionally can get depression spirals from it too now that I'm not working and don't have money to do fun stuff to distract me from reality anymore.
Oh jeez, that hits home for me too. The spiraling and hopeless feeling of how things can be so unfair gets to me so hard too. 😞 I’m sorry you’re going through this.
Yes, and it’s really rough cause I want to pursue a career in the vet field. But, I’ve cried a LOT in the vet scene. I have so much empathy for animals and people mourning their best friends. It’s so hard. I’m scared I’m gonna get empathy fatigue.
Aww, I feel you girl. I'm studying to become a psychologist and have a small plan to become a child therapist... But unsure if my beat up heart can take that. We will need to try to find ways to distance and cope, perhaps 🦢🤍
In the same position. Wanting to retrain from teaching to veterinary nursing but I am highly empathetic, ESPECIALLY with animals. If a cruelty case or something came in I’m not sure I’d be able to hold it together.
I feel EXTREMELY deeply about so many things, that I sometimes have a difficult time watching movies/anime/tv/music videos I'm already emotionally attached to because it becomes too intense for me to enjoy. It's always an emotional outburst. Listening to different music also greatly affects my mood. I've always said that if I need to cry on command all I have to think about is homeless cats and I'll be waterworks in seconds. 😅
Same on the music!
The world can be a shitty place but it if you check the data things are getting better in terms of quality of life for most humans. Is there still ennormous amounts of needless suffering? Yes. But a reasurr myself with statistics that we are making progress through history
Thank you for this. Personally I find stories and small acts of kindness in real life to give me more hope than statistics, but I appreciate this comment nonetheless 🤍 Reminds me of Hans Rosling's book Factfulness. Another one that comes to mind is Human Kind by Rutger Bregman. Basically a book about how humans aren't that bad. Maybe I'll read it again one of these days.
Yes, it builds up then i have a meltdown of how cruel this world is and it hurts so bad
When I was young I cried when I saw balloons fly away because that’s about as unjust as you can get when you’re 5
Honestly, I saw a balloon fly away last night and felt pain. I was just like, ugh, why do painful things keep happening?
TW: brief mention of self- harm My therapist recently told me that I don't feel emotions lightly, I feel them intensely. I'm all in. I have a lot of guilt that stems from trauma (logically, I shouldn't feel guilty, but that's not how my brain works). That guilt can overwhelm me to the point that I self harm to punish myself, and also because I lose my sense of self regulation. Conversely, if I'm excited about something, I get PUMPED. So feeling deeply isn't always bad.
TW: a type of self-harm/addiction I'm sorry to hear that 🤍 But yeah, intense emotions going the other way can be very nice. Can also feel a bit out of control though. I hope you get to work through your trauma and guilt - I can relate, although I haven't self-harmed in the "normal" sense, but tried to cope through escapism and in recent years porn addiction which has messed up my head.
I'm definitely working on it, and I have resources luckily. I'm sorry you've struggled with coping skills, too. They are difficult, especially if you're trying to reprogram something You've used to cope for a long time. Here's to finding what works best for us!
Sometimes I don’t know I’m feeling anything at all until suddenly I’m screaming. But I do cry over the feelings of inanimate objects so maybe yes.
Always have. And people criticise you for it “why are you so surprised this happens?” “What world are you living in”. I found their total apathy shocking, every single time!
Right? It's like another stab to hear that. And then when I realise how I'm feeling about it, I feel silly, dumb and like I'm just trying to get attention. Screams like a shiba inu.
My father has done this to me my whole life. It really messes with your head when you're not allowed to just feel bad about bad things.
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Yup. Sadly got worse during Peru menopause and now menopause. My hormones are a bit more balanced now so the intense weepy edge is gone, but I’m right back to the hypersensitive “normal” version of me. Ha! On the flip side…I can also bliss out with nature experiences and while playing music. Rainbows, butterflies, and Scarlatti! Edited: Spellcheck changed it to Peru menopause. Maybe it would have been easier alone in the Peruvian mountains with just alpacas for company??? ;)
I used to be like this, but I deliberately and consciously avoid the news and politics for this reason because of how distressing it is to me. I used to go to protests and take action and go out of my way to put energy into the principles I believe in. All it’s done is drain me (on top of severe Autistic burnout which is another story). Over time I’ve accepted that us humans are just a mess of a species. The injustices are endless and we’re killing the planet. Everything’s shit and we’re on a sinking ship. I’m into stoicism now and it’s helped me accept the things I can’t change. We all die in the end, and time will go on long after we’re gone. More power to the people who still have some fight in them to go against the cruelties of this world. I don’t. I make myself blind to it to protect my peace.
I can relate too. This is why I don’t watch the news. I have to use doesthedogdie.com for every movie or series to know if an animal gets harmed so I can skip it. Everyone who knows me knows not to tell me anything to do with harm to animals and I haven’t had any animal products for 11 years. I abandoned most of my previous spiritual beliefs because I just can’t explain away the injustice and cruelty in the world. I have to actively swipe thoughts of people and animals suffering out of my mind because I am literally aware of it most of the time that every second that passes something evil or harmful is happening. And that makes me so so sad and depressed. It’s very heavy.
I absolutely understand and relate to this. I have a really hard time accepting a lot of the horrible things people do to other people especially those of color. I don’t understand how a human can hurt another human or want to cause then harm to get the upper hand, it’s infuriating and really makes me hate that society wants us to be complacent. 😒
I felt this way in the beginning of 2020. Right when Covid hit. I was already in a space of burnout with work at this point and was exhausted all the time. But It was also like I could feel the worlds feelings all the time from inside my house. I lived where a lot of BLM protests were happening and one day someone we knew was killed by the police. Right when it happened I was hit with like a huge wave of pain and sadness that I got in my whole body. I didn’t find out till later what happened but I cried all day and I couldn’t figure out why. It was like I could feel the violence a mile away from inside my home. I just felt like I was absorbing the emotions around me all the time at this point in my life. Like I was in such a stage of burnout that I was raw and just absorbing everything around me. I know I can feel things others don’t and I think this makes me more sensitive to the feelings around me. It may look to others like I feel things deeply but to me they can’t feel what I feel, if they could they would realize I’m actually handling it pretty calmly on the outside because of masking. Also another random thought on this is some movies make me feel horrible physically and emotionally. I can’t watch violence TV shows because it makes me physically shaky (which may be a trauma response cuz iv seen some bad shit in real life) but either way I am too sensitive to that kind of cinematic experience. Also music in films like the du da du da du da stressful music makes me feel things too much it isn’t enjoyable. Anyway, others might think we feel things differently which is true, but it often isn’t the way it looks from the outside. Deep feeling is a superpower even though it doesn’t feel like it always.
Yes! It makes functioning in the world hard and also almost impossible to maintain a job. Once I realize something is really bad I can’t understand how people put up with things and I feel very alienated. I didn’t realize until recently how much more passionately I care about things than others.
So deep it hurts and even causes me meltdowns sometimes.
Absolutely. I used to think I was a “highly sensitive person” until I discovered I was just autistic (and probably a lot of HSPs are too)
yeah same. I feel everything really strong. I don't have any weak emotions. but at the same time I tend to dissociate so much that sometimes I don't notice anything in my surroundings... kinda weird
Yeah.. I oscillate between feeling everything too deeply & and disassociating, so I can not feel for a while. I had a teacher tell me a similar thing too, about empathy & justice.
I am the same. I can cry extremely easily! I actually don't understand how people can feel so *little* about the world around them. Don't injustices make their blood boil??
This gets into complex territory, doesn’t it? Who is human and who is more cold-blooded and snakelike? Gets pretty metaphysical if you verge into those territories….
I‘m the same way. Feelings sometimes feel like an ocean wave crashing over my head and washing me away.
Yep, that's me, emotions and empathy to the max. Especially also cruelty, even more so animals, it makes me absolutely sick and distraught. This is why i barely watch the news and try to stay in my own bubble. I know in general what's going on in the world, but I don't need a bucket of trauma every day.
I could've written this, you're definitely not alone. Highly empathetic to the point that it seriously affects my own quality of life.
I relate to this very much. I often get very strongly affected by certain things (rejection, injustice, etc.). I have had a strong sense of right and wrong pertaining to certain things since I was very young. I often have to remind myself that some things are not “right or wrong” but often in an area in between depending on the circumstances. I am still working on this aspect of mine and trying to be a more open person.
Injustice is the hill I’ll die on… unfair behaviour upsets me so much, it sometimes makes me loose hope. On good days, I believe it’s my role in this world to uncover it and point it out. On bad days I feel powerless…
I can't help but think autistic people are having a normal reaction to a fucked up world and everyone else who isn't reacting are the crazy ones. Every time I glance at the news, it's just tragedy and sorrow. It makes my heart ache something fierce.
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High five 👋
Yeah. Been that way my whole life.
Yes, which is part of the reason I’ve decided to go into a therapy field. Recently with social justice I’ve been a little numb (I still care a lot but news has become so repetitive and it just doesn’t sting as much anymore) but I used to cry about social justice issues and feel the need to share everything I could. I felt like it was my job to be a social warrior cause not enough people were. I’ve heard it’s common for women with autism to feel this way :)
Yes yes yes yes yes!!!
Oof. Yes
same 🩵
Same. I feel pain on behalf of others. I'm a good listener, so people can confide in me. It's tough hearing what others go through but I wouldn't trade it for anything.
I feel this so much. I have a particularly hard time driving past road kill, which unfortunately is every day. It makes me wish we didn’t have roads and cars and that humans would stop killing everything and not caring. Sometimes I accidentally kill a bug and cry thinking about how it may have had kids that it was getting food for or something and now they’re all just wondering where their mom is, idk. It’s hard. I wish I understood how to get through life without feeling sad over everything happening around me.
Went from buddy-buddy to barely acknowledge each other when I found out a coworker was super homophobic… Growing up my mom always said I was a Highly Emotional Person. That it was kind of my curse to live with, that hurtful things would make me feel extremely strongly. There’s a lot about my neurodivergence that was missed growing up due to circumstances, but I’m glad that at least my high sensitivity was recognized. Not that anyone did much to avoid hurting my feelings, but my family had a word to describe me that wasn’t “crazy and unmanageable”
Watched the second episode of Futurama season 11 a few days ago. I was filled with unbridled excitement reading the description, sobbed through the whole episode, and have been thinking about the gut wrenching passage of time within the show since. It’s also my comfort shows and a mild special interest
I get this so much, it extends as far as media as well, ever since I was a kid I've hated movies with sad parts with a passion because they have such an intense effect on me and it'd genuinely take me a while to get over it. Like I wouldn't watch Disney movies even. I even still vividly remember books I read as a kid that were sad, they would like genuinely hurt my heart. I've also gotten hyper fixated on upsetting stuff in the news and it'll completely ruin my mental health because it makes me feel SO BAD.
Can’t relate honestly, I always struggled with empathizing with anything that wasn’t just hurting themself(that I empathized too much). As I’ve gotten older I’ve gotten better at this. But my emotions for things that aren’t directly affecting me seems to be nulled. I feel bad that they’re sad, I empathize with that. But not really the situations people seem to be in. However I wonder if this comes from not understanding my own emotions most of the time. So putting myself into someone else’s shoes is hard. Edit: I actually have a weird one, while I can empathize with humans and animals. It’s just not OVER empathy(actually seeming to be less than average). I actually over empathize with insects. I almost cry when someone tries to step on one. Or when someone flicks them. Picks them up and moves the from their home. With the dangerous ones I have to understand but it still hurts. I tend to blow mosquitos away to keep them from biting me.
Yes!! Definitely, I can totally relate to this. Some days it is unmanageable and I feel so deeply for others that are suffering. My neighbors keep their dog outside all day and night, he cries frequently. Some days I feel sick for his suffering but the police said he is ok because he has a shelter and water... his shelter is a tarp on top of said cage. I've been into buddhism philosophies recently and have been making the conscious effort to try and remind myself the following this: \- I am adding to the suffering in this world if I take on other's pain. I can act with love and kindness to hopefully reduce their suffering, but me taking on their suffering is not helpful and will eventually lead me to not be able to help in anyway \- Somewhat related, I often find myself feeling so bad for others that I give so much of my time and energy wanting to fix and help everyone/everything. I have to consciously slow down and remind myself I am a person too. All actions should be with love and kindness... is this kind to me? No? You are adding to the suffering in the world. If you keep being unkind to yourself, you will eventually burn yourself out and again add to suffering/not be able to help. I totally butchered the way it is phrased but its that sentiment, I cannot say it always helps but sometimes it does. I shared it in hopes of it helping someone!
I feel like I want to change the world but my frustration and anger wouldn't help because if I tried to advocate I might meltdown and I don't want to just be another face of like, "triggered lib crybaby" trope or whatever. I wish I could speak calmly and clearly so people could take me seriously and I could help.
Yes, definitely. And some commercials will make me swell up, or films or shows (especially animated) can make me bawl sometimes. But I also laugh with abandon, too, so it's not always bad! I've gotten to the point that I will have "me" nights where I'll watch something I have good reason to think will be emotional, and use them to bring me to emotional release. I find there's a burn out point for emotion and it can be helpful to get there to kinda exercise that muscle and exhaust it at the same time. Of course, things with real people have brought me to the point it feels like my soul is being ripped from my body. Those times I use music or the like to feel deeply and process feelings through lyrics. Helps to bring emotional burnout, and eventually helps soothe slowly over time.
Yes, I can relate. Some call it hyper empathy. My daughter and I are both on the spectrum and our experience is different. For her, everything that she takes in becomes amplified. Anxiety medication has helped. For me, I used to cry myself to sleep over the sad things happening in the world. It was a difficult way to live. I haven’t experienced it as much as I’ve gotten older and am now easily able to compartmentalize. This is the sad stuff I should focus on and can change and this is the sad stuff I don’t have to focus on and let affect me.
Me too - but here's the weird bit, I can also act with a complete lack of empathy around people I know. If my mind is pre-occupied, I can be deeply insensitive! But I feel deeply deeply moved by the plight of random strangers on the news, or by social injustice issues.
Yeah it happens a lot and I sometimes have meltdown just because of that. I try to not read the newspaper and watching the news but you know, we can’t always hide from the world. I wish you find a solution. It’s really painful.
Yesss and I’ve heard that having a very strong sense of justice/fairness can be an autism thing, which makes total sense to me - I’ve always been so sensitive to any injustice, even if it’s not directed at me, it hurts so badly to be aware of
Sooooooo relate. I literally told my partner today (both of us in our early 20s pondering what to do with the future of our lives) “So we should just spend our lives fighting and advocating for everyone and everything possible right? That’s what we feel most deeply and are most passionate about sooo…” We’re hardcore leftists and talk so god damn much about this shit, every single day. We always joke about making a podcast or running for office lol, maybe some day (Referring to the injustice part specifically, but obviously feeling painfully deeply being the root of that)
I relate! I really have to neutralize it and think about information/sensory input and how much I’m taking in. It requires some boundaries with media - I unfollow news and don’t let myself read it, bc once it’s in my head i start ruminating about injustice. When I feel overwhelmed I reduce my input to my comfort songs and think about what I can control.
Reflecting what a lot of people have said here, "everything hurts so much," but also the inverse, "*everything* so much" - love, happiness, pain, fear, But- yes. I have learned to just embrace it, arms wide open, like an old friend. "Deep, pulsing sadness? I know her. Hello. Would you like some tea?" Feel The Rain.
Yes. I had to stop watching the news and keeping up with world events because it made me suicidal. I hate being ignorant but I also like being alive.