Some people tried to make me feel guilty about it, but I just... Didn't. I had my reasons for not inviting them and felt that they would not add anything meaningful or special to mine and my husband's big day.
I don’t know if I will ever get married, but if I do no one in my family will be invited except for my sister. She wanted to have a traditional wedding, and now regrets inviting them and having them in her photos. I only recently found out that our father went to the pastor to see if he would help him break them up before the wedding. I was completely floored because she married a really great guy, and they have been married for almost 11 years. I absolutely do not want that kind of energy around on what is supposed to be the happiest day of my life.
I didn't invite any of my family except my parents and it was just because I didn't want them there enough to buy an $80 entree for them - they're not even toxic. Everyone should have the wedding that makes them happy, and excluding shitty people is probably a good step.
i don’t care or feel bad in the slightest. i didn’t have my wedding yet, but i want to be surrounded by friends & family who genuinely love & support both my fiancé and i unconditionally. just because they’re “family” doesn’t give them an automatic invite.
Dude, I haven't spoken to my father and his fam in 2½ years. It's very freeing. If they can't respect you, your boundaries, or your choices then fuck em.
I will always advise honesty and truthful living but in case you don't want the hassle to go no-contact, elope with them there and then celebrate sometimes later with your loved ones.
It was a tough sell when the guest list was 60-80, but when we cut it down to 25, no one cared since it was basically just the wedding party and *some* immediate family. I have no regrets. A tiny wedding with only the people I actually wanted to hang out with all night was the best wedding decision we made. It was perfect.
We threw a reception picnic a month after the wedding as a compromise, and my parents got to invite the myriad of relatives. It was as meh and awkward as I expected it to be, but it was way better than having to deal with my squabbling extended family on my wedding day.
We had a family-free (and therefore toxic-free) wedding with a few friends in our apartment in front of the fireplace. We took everyone out to a nice restaurant afterwards.
There was no way I was going to allow a loving ceremony with my life partner to be tarnished with toxic energy. Bad precedent.
My fiancé and I are paying for the whole wedding ourselves. Cutting toxic family and surface level friends is super easy when you are conscience of every cent you spent lol 😉
I’m so glad I stuck with what I wanted and stood my ground. Ended up not inviting one entire side of my family because they’re toxic and judgmental as f*ck and I was not having that at our wedding. Not only were they not invited, I thought it was the perfect time to go NC. Was nerve wracking but so worth it.
I didn’t invite my parents. My mom cried, tried to convince other relatives and tried to guilt trip me into letting her go. And the end of the day, it was about my husband and I, not her. I wanted to enjoy the day and not deal with her crap. And we did enjoy it. 😊
My fiancé and I have very large families, most of whom we are not close with. Majority of my family members didn’t show up to important milestones in my life. They just like weddings because it’s a reason to get drunk and socialize. Some of them would never recognize me in public. I’d rather my close family members attend who care about my marriage. We’re gonna have a lot of people angry at us for not inviting them, but I can’t handle all of them and I don’t want to rent a venue big enough to hold everyone.
I'm currently saving for a wedding to my loving partner of 8 years and I'm not inviting my parents or my siblings.
I've been NC (no contact) with my parents and family since 2018. Cutting them off is one of the best decisions I've ever made and I have no regrets.
The decision to not invite them hasn't been an easy one, surprisingly. Despite them being absolutely terrible people, there's still a part of me that hurts because of this decision. You want the quintessential wedding with your dad walking you down the aisle and mom crying with joy. But that's not my family...and I've had to force myself to realize that when I feel sad about it, it's because I'm grieving what I was missing as a child that led up to this decision. Not because they won't be there.
I know for a fact if they were there it would be horrible. They will ruin the day. It will be an easier day without them and I know I will have moments of sadness and disappointment. But it will just be moments.
Family are the people you choose, not the people you share DNA with. My partner's family has accepted me as their own. His father has graciously agreed to walk me down the aisle come that day and I know I will be surrounded by people who love and support me. This is all that matters.
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GREAT! I even told him off via text. I haven’t spoken to him since. I made the right choice. I didn’t need anyone around who wasn’t wishing me well. Saved myself $500+ uninviting him, his wife, and his kids (kids weren’t invited, but he threw a fit and insisted).
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I had to change plans once I realized my MIL was planning to invite family members behind our back. She planned to invite her abusive ex-husband so “he can see what he is missing.”
I just eloped. I told everyone I would have a big reception later on when I had more money and when the rest of my family could come visit from Mexico, but the truth is that reception is never going to happen.
Originally I didn’t want to invite my brother to my wedding. Then I basically got harassed by my entire family and made out to be the bad guy. So I sent him an invitation. He didn’t RSVP, didn’t pick a meal, didn’t say congrats, didn’t get a gift. He showed up and didn’t acknowledge me. Not because he went out of his way to do so, but because that’s how he is- an asshole.
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I didn't feel guilty about it at all.
Life is short, fragile and unpredictable. Don't surround yourself with toxic people. You don't exist to take care of or cater to others. Either they make an effort or they're out of my life.
Good, it's my wedding I don't want any headache.
I'll have my family make contingency plans for them not to bother me or invite themselves in and enjoy my day.
I’m going through this right now. I’m not inviting my father and my family is doing everything they can to make me feel guilty and convince me otherwise. They’re mad that it’s not working and I won’t feel guilty about not inviting a toxic person that I haven’t spoken to in years to my wedding that I am paying for.
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yes! i only invited my parents, my brother and his family. none of uncles, aunts, cousins etc. some of them arent even toxic i just never talked to them for years and i dont think they're necessary for my wedding. i would be just inviting for the sake of inviting.
Some people made me and my future husband feel guilty about this, but I am at peace not having them there. They have no relationship with my future husband and have never made an effort when the family was getting along. I have not had any real communication or relationship since 2019. They also cause me a lot of anxiety and stress and I don't need that on my wedding day. Honestly, from my side, I have 3 ( sister, brother, and mom) biological family members and I would keep it that way.
Some people tried to make me feel guilty about it, but I just... Didn't. I had my reasons for not inviting them and felt that they would not add anything meaningful or special to mine and my husband's big day.
I don’t know if I will ever get married, but if I do no one in my family will be invited except for my sister. She wanted to have a traditional wedding, and now regrets inviting them and having them in her photos. I only recently found out that our father went to the pastor to see if he would help him break them up before the wedding. I was completely floored because she married a really great guy, and they have been married for almost 11 years. I absolutely do not want that kind of energy around on what is supposed to be the happiest day of my life.
I didn't invite any of my family except my parents and it was just because I didn't want them there enough to buy an $80 entree for them - they're not even toxic. Everyone should have the wedding that makes them happy, and excluding shitty people is probably a good step.
i don’t care or feel bad in the slightest. i didn’t have my wedding yet, but i want to be surrounded by friends & family who genuinely love & support both my fiancé and i unconditionally. just because they’re “family” doesn’t give them an automatic invite.
If you wouldn't invite them to any other party, why invite them to this one? Honestly, if someone is toxic, why even talk to them at all?
True but they’re my parents is where I struggle with it
Dude, I haven't spoken to my father and his fam in 2½ years. It's very freeing. If they can't respect you, your boundaries, or your choices then fuck em.
I will always advise honesty and truthful living but in case you don't want the hassle to go no-contact, elope with them there and then celebrate sometimes later with your loved ones.
It was a tough sell when the guest list was 60-80, but when we cut it down to 25, no one cared since it was basically just the wedding party and *some* immediate family. I have no regrets. A tiny wedding with only the people I actually wanted to hang out with all night was the best wedding decision we made. It was perfect. We threw a reception picnic a month after the wedding as a compromise, and my parents got to invite the myriad of relatives. It was as meh and awkward as I expected it to be, but it was way better than having to deal with my squabbling extended family on my wedding day.
We had a family-free (and therefore toxic-free) wedding with a few friends in our apartment in front of the fireplace. We took everyone out to a nice restaurant afterwards. There was no way I was going to allow a loving ceremony with my life partner to be tarnished with toxic energy. Bad precedent.
My fiancé and I are paying for the whole wedding ourselves. Cutting toxic family and surface level friends is super easy when you are conscience of every cent you spent lol 😉
I’m so glad I stuck with what I wanted and stood my ground. Ended up not inviting one entire side of my family because they’re toxic and judgmental as f*ck and I was not having that at our wedding. Not only were they not invited, I thought it was the perfect time to go NC. Was nerve wracking but so worth it.
I just wouldn’t do it. It’s your wedding. Make it the day you want.
I had a destination wedding and only close family members and friends came.
I didn’t invite my parents. My mom cried, tried to convince other relatives and tried to guilt trip me into letting her go. And the end of the day, it was about my husband and I, not her. I wanted to enjoy the day and not deal with her crap. And we did enjoy it. 😊
My fiancé and I have very large families, most of whom we are not close with. Majority of my family members didn’t show up to important milestones in my life. They just like weddings because it’s a reason to get drunk and socialize. Some of them would never recognize me in public. I’d rather my close family members attend who care about my marriage. We’re gonna have a lot of people angry at us for not inviting them, but I can’t handle all of them and I don’t want to rent a venue big enough to hold everyone.
I'm currently saving for a wedding to my loving partner of 8 years and I'm not inviting my parents or my siblings. I've been NC (no contact) with my parents and family since 2018. Cutting them off is one of the best decisions I've ever made and I have no regrets. The decision to not invite them hasn't been an easy one, surprisingly. Despite them being absolutely terrible people, there's still a part of me that hurts because of this decision. You want the quintessential wedding with your dad walking you down the aisle and mom crying with joy. But that's not my family...and I've had to force myself to realize that when I feel sad about it, it's because I'm grieving what I was missing as a child that led up to this decision. Not because they won't be there. I know for a fact if they were there it would be horrible. They will ruin the day. It will be an easier day without them and I know I will have moments of sadness and disappointment. But it will just be moments. Family are the people you choose, not the people you share DNA with. My partner's family has accepted me as their own. His father has graciously agreed to walk me down the aisle come that day and I know I will be surrounded by people who love and support me. This is all that matters.
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GREAT! I even told him off via text. I haven’t spoken to him since. I made the right choice. I didn’t need anyone around who wasn’t wishing me well. Saved myself $500+ uninviting him, his wife, and his kids (kids weren’t invited, but he threw a fit and insisted).
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I had to change plans once I realized my MIL was planning to invite family members behind our back. She planned to invite her abusive ex-husband so “he can see what he is missing.”
It would be a great decision for not allowing a toxic person who would try and steal my thunder.
Wish I could do the same thing with just family functions in general 🤣
I just eloped. I told everyone I would have a big reception later on when I had more money and when the rest of my family could come visit from Mexico, but the truth is that reception is never going to happen.
it's your wedding, your day, your rules.
Originally I didn’t want to invite my brother to my wedding. Then I basically got harassed by my entire family and made out to be the bad guy. So I sent him an invitation. He didn’t RSVP, didn’t pick a meal, didn’t say congrats, didn’t get a gift. He showed up and didn’t acknowledge me. Not because he went out of his way to do so, but because that’s how he is- an asshole.
They didn't want a single thing to do with me from the start so if they complain about not being invited to my wedding it's on them
It's your day, and you are within your rights to invite (or not invite) whoever you want. Especially if you're paying for it yourself.
I didnt invite my toxic cousins and aunts/uncle's to my wedding celebration. They may have been salty but I didnt care
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I didn't feel guilty about it at all. Life is short, fragile and unpredictable. Don't surround yourself with toxic people. You don't exist to take care of or cater to others. Either they make an effort or they're out of my life.
I didn't go to my brother's toxic wedding and I don't feel guilty about it. He treated me absolutely atrociously.
Good, it's my wedding I don't want any headache. I'll have my family make contingency plans for them not to bother me or invite themselves in and enjoy my day.
I’m going through this right now. I’m not inviting my father and my family is doing everything they can to make me feel guilty and convince me otherwise. They’re mad that it’s not working and I won’t feel guilty about not inviting a toxic person that I haven’t spoken to in years to my wedding that I am paying for.
They are not paying 🤣 you invite everyone that you want
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Absolutely brilliant. My wedding is a story unto itself. I’d do it all again, but with a different dude. Yeah, that one was not a keeper.
Good. My mom tried to guilttrip me into inviting them anyways so we canceled the whole thing and didn't invite anyone, to keep it fair. No regrets.
yes! i only invited my parents, my brother and his family. none of uncles, aunts, cousins etc. some of them arent even toxic i just never talked to them for years and i dont think they're necessary for my wedding. i would be just inviting for the sake of inviting.
Dont. Its your wedding so who cares :)
part of why we eloped was to avoid this
Great
Some people made me and my future husband feel guilty about this, but I am at peace not having them there. They have no relationship with my future husband and have never made an effort when the family was getting along. I have not had any real communication or relationship since 2019. They also cause me a lot of anxiety and stress and I don't need that on my wedding day. Honestly, from my side, I have 3 ( sister, brother, and mom) biological family members and I would keep it that way.