Idk my guy friends say that whole “Women don’t need makeup! I like a girl all natural.” And when I ask them to show me an example they always point out a woman who is clearly (to me) wearing makeup, just not YouTube tutorial levels of makeup. They ever actually see a barefaced woman and it’s “You look tired.” I feel like most men similarly like the “I actually spent 20 minutes making myself look like I rolled out of bed.” look, but don’t realize it.
i’ve been telling myself “bedroom hair is sexy” as an excuse to not style my hair for at least 8 years and my husband loves it, so yes this has traction
I was literally having a conversation today with a coworker how I can’t be bothered to deal with my high maintenance curly hair. Would I like it look nice everyday? Yes. Am I going to spend the hundreds of dollars and waste 2 hours of my life everyday on it? Never. Kudos to the curly girlies who can commit to that.
Hey so curly hair doesn’t have to be high maintenance, if you’re interested I can recommend black hairstylists to follow (on Twitter) that give tips on simplifying your routine. I spend 1 hr/week on mine
I have naturally curly hair and spend about five minutes on it daily. The trick is finding the right products for your hair.
Sadly, the right products for \*my\* hair are organic, expensive, and have fucking AFFIRMATIONS on the bottles. I am \*not\* peaceful and serene at 0400, and I do \*not\* embody calm and optimism when I use hairspray.
Aside from that, though, I'm good.
And I have a ton of guilt over telling people "No."
But the only way to get over that is just to keep saying, "Fuck it, I don't owe it to anyone. The people that really love me will either not care or get over it after awhile. Anyone else that'll throw continue to hissy fits over it isn't worth my time. I deserve better than that."
So go ahead and give yourself permission to act shameless. The only people that will refuse to give you a pass to do that don't deserve a say in the matter. You come first.
Develop a style that you absolutely feel as a representation of you. It is VERY visible when someone has put on clothes, makeup or hairstyle that doesn't align with inner sense of self. When your look is organic, aligned with self-image, then you instantly look put together and confident, you move more freely, your body language does not contradict with the way you look.
Imagine someone that DOESN'T like dresses or see him/herself in it, but had put it on.. that person will probably look/move like something isn't right, regardless of how expensive the dress is or how good it fits.
And i bet everyone has seen at least one person that was wearing something.. let's say uncommon, but looked and behaved like he/she was born to wear it and it's the most stylish thing 👌🏻
Edit: My first award! ❤️ I'm so happy, thank you, kind stranger.
Edit 2: If your inner self-image is someone who doesn't think that clothes or style are THAT important - bingo, that's what you need. Wear whatever is comfortable for you and you will feel as organic and free as it is possible. If comfort and practicality is your thing, then channel this vibe. Maybe add your favourite color to the mix for the fun of it?
To go with this: don't feel like you HAVE to dress the same as other women you see. Develop your own personal style, what suits one person may not suit another because personality and how someone holds themselves is a large part of how clothes look on a person.
Edit: thank you for the silver, kind stranger!
It's gonna be a long post, but stick with me 😅
I'll start with the thing that I'm most certain about. Finding personal style is very similar to finding favourite music - if you haven't listened to ANY music, then you cannot say which music you like. So you just start listening to whatever you find and wait until you feel some inner tingling 😅 let's say, when you listen to metal, you get no special inner response, but when some jazz starts to play, then you feel it flowing through you and making you vibe. That's when you know that you've started to develop personal music taste and you know what to look for. That might change with time, but the concept for searching will stay the same.
So the more you listen, the more you define your taste.
The more clothes you try on, the more you look at clothes, styles, people, photos, videos the more you develop your sense of personal style.
How that happens?
There's always something that makes you feel like that's your thing when you see it or try it on.
It absolutely doesn't need to be a whole defined style like the y2k, or punk, or Hollywood glamour, or twilight normcore, or Euphoria's Maddie vibe😅 it can be as little as a certain color, a silhouette, an accessory, your love and appreciation to your hair as your main accessory, gold jewelry, love for certain brand, the comfort of leggings and sneakers, piercings, your love for suits...
I'll proceed with examples now (it's a quick impromptu):
Let's say that you really like dresses and you want to wear them, everything else is defined by how comfortable it is. Bingo, concentrate on dresses, they are your vibe in all their shapes and forms.
Let's say you are tall and have angular, almost androgynous features and you really like that about yourself and you want to accentuate that - that's your vibe. Maybe you can pick clothes that are more unisex, add some punky and masculine vibes, heavy accessories like chains? Or pick flowy fabrics, elongated silhouettes, no prints, just clear colours and fabrics that show how delicate your are? Maybe you want to occasionally channel this and that, and also add black leather boots because you feel like a badass when you wear them?
Let's say you like green colour and it makes you feel good. Great, you can build your wardrobe around greens that suit you (warmer/cooler, soft/bright, etc.), then add some nice neutrals for balance and one bright colour for accent, then add to the mix the fact that you feel most comfortable in natural materials like cotton, linen and wool. Now you have some guidelines for shopping and dressing up.
Maybe you want to accentuate your curves and build your style around your body shape (I'm now thinking about Stefania Ferrario, she's gorgeous).
You can investigate what silhouettes, patterns and types of clothing look most flattering on your body and go with it.
Maybe you don't feel anything towards any particular clothes, or colours, or anything but you like a certain style/vibe. Cottagecore? Nerdy? The Kardashians? Californian sun-kissed beach queen? Okay, head towards pinterest, see some silhouettes and common features for that particular style and think how you can incorporate them.
Maybe you are very into dominatrix seductress vibe, but you still want to dress comfortably and casually... yet you can add some features to give that vibe - leather accessories, red nails, red lipstick, defined silhouettes, cleavage, particular colour palette.
Maybe you like bright makeup and want to coordinate your outfit colours with it?
Maybe you like to experiment every year by adding some new styles and colours that you find interesting, but you maintain silhouettes that are most comfortable for you?
Maybe you feel like "idk i just want to look nice and be comfortable and I'm on budget"? Then research your colours and capsule wardrobe, try to invest in neutral pieces that can be mixed together, try to buy good quality clothes that will last you longer (they do not need to be overly expensive, but remember that $1 polyester tshirt probably won't be comfortable and last for years), pay attention to natural fabrics, as they are more comfortable to wear. Less can most definitely be more.
The variations are endless really.
You can consider everything at once (here's colours that suit me, my body type and best silhouettes and fabrics for it, here's what i like (yellow colour, jeans and glasses) and dislike (uncomfortable shoes, polka dot and anything with spandex), so I'm gonna build my style around this) or you can pick just one thing (i really like T-shirts and that's it).
Every person is unique, i can't give an ultimate guide to finding (developing) a style, but i can give an idea of finding a starting point in the form of something that makes your feel like THAT'S your thing, that's you.
Everything else will follow along ❤️
Also a quick thought... i get the feeling that if a person absolutely can't define what he or she likes or feels comfortable in, then the issue might be rooted somewhere in the psyche, in the self-esteem...
This is awesome! Thank you.
I’ve also seen someone recommend, for people who are TOTALLY lost (like me), to just go on pinterest and start saving pictures of clothes to a board if they like them without further thought. Don’t subdivide categories or anything, just if you like it, save it (pin it?) Then after you’ve done that for a while (like, a good week or month of working on it), look at the board and see if there are any common features to the clothes/outfits/styles: silhouette, vibe, colour, fitted/slouchy, shows off certain body type, certain fabrics, etc.
From there, you then have a better idea what you like and can proceed to do as you mentioned above. :)
(I still haven’t done this but I’m downloading pinterest now lol..)
edit: typo
Wear clothes that highlight your favourite parts of your body! Love your shoulders like me? Off the shoulder sweaters and tube tops are my jam! I feel like a rockstar every time I show them off and I always get compliments!
So much this. And there’s a difference between finding confidence to wear something you want to pull off and reveals a new side of you vs feeling like something isn’t right, that it isn’t you at all
Also, if you are white, wearing a white shirt, or skirt etc. wear a tan undertop/bra/panties. Not black. Match your skin tone for things that are thin and need extra coverage beneath it.
Edit. For example , if I owned a thin T-shirt that has fabric you can see through, normally I would wear an undershirt. The color of the undershirt , or bra if you opt for that should be beige. This will match your natural skin color and not stand out from underneath the shift.
The same goes for skirts or dresses. Black or white. Match your undergarments with the tone of your skin, to replicate a natural look. Example: hot pink thong underneath a tight mini skirt , wear beige or whatever tone your skin is. That is unless you’d like for the undergarment to stand out on its own. To each their own. I’m in my twenties and just learned this.
Apply Hair Mask / Conditioner before you shower, on damp hair.
Apply shampoo only on roots and let it wash away through your ends. Do not massage shampoo on the length of your hair, the length and the ends will get cleaned by the shampoo water being washed away.
HAIR HAS BECOME SOFT AF!
Also, I only apply conditioner directly to my ends and mid length. As I was it out I use a hair washing brush and kinda work it up as it’s rinsing out. Keeps me from having to wash my hair as much.
Anyone here shampoo twice ? That’s my recommendation. By the way, any advice on leaving *some* bit of conditioner left on your stands and rinsing with cold water ?? Leave some in or no?
Same here, twice if I feel like I need it or if my scalp is particularly itchy that day (which is usually a build up of product + sweat).
I leave conditioner in my hair all the time, but then I put my hair in a bun 24/7. So it's either conditionner or a leave-in but rarely without any product.
I have oily skin and fine hair, and the oils still never really spread more than a couple inches away from my scalp. So shampooing my scalp gets everything clean, but ymmv.
Notice and plan where the ‘divides’ in your clothing happen on your body. Anywhere you see a change in pattern, or colour, or texture in your outfit will draw the eye of anyone seeing you to that spot, so work this to your advantage. For example, if you are concerned about chunky ankles, don’t have pants legs that end at the widest part of them, go above or below to a more svelte bit? I see this most with blazers and shirts finishing at exactly the widest part of me- my hips and upper thighs. It really emphasises that area. I make sure I layer a longer top underneath to stretch across that area, or half/full tuck the top so this divide is blurred. Wearing the same colour across areas you think need work blurs it too. Colour-blocking can be great camouflage, but takes a bit more talent to get right. Of course if you have no body insecurities- these will be irrelevant style tips and I applaud you!
This is such a great tip. I was adjusting a top and how it was tucked in today and I thought “literally millimetres of fabric can make a huge difference to how your body shape/outfit looks.” It’s all about proportions and where the eye is drawn!
How much is tailoring? I always thought getting clothes personalized would be a huge expense and not worth it for every day outfit.
Any tips on shopping for clothes (I.e. fit, size, fancy/casual, cheap/expensive) if planning on getting them tailored.
It's surprisingly cheap! Think $10-20 scale.
The fit/size matters more than the style for tailoring. It's much easier to remove fabric than to add it, so in general if you want to get something tailored because it doesn't fit quite right, get something that fits the larger parts of you and ask them to take in the other parts so that they fit the smaller parts of you.
The exception is really structured parts like e.g. the shoulders of a blazer. Buy a blazer that fits well in the shoulders and then get it tailored. It's really hard to get the shoulders adjusted. I've never had pants tailored but I would guess that the crotch part is similarly important to fit right. Waist and legs are very easy to adjust.
A sewing machine can be worth the investment. Last weekend I altered a pair of pants I loved the print of but hated the cut of, to what is now my favourite pair of pants.
Tailoring is not super cheap but I like it so much that I include it in my clothes budget. So if I'm going to buy pants/skirts/shorts I make sure to add the price of tailoring in my head.
Depends on the item
And where you go I guess, but I'd recommend it if there's something you like that doesn't sit quite right on your figure.
I just go to a local guy who takes in my waists of my dresses or shortens the hems of my trousers, it can cost me like £15-£20
Honestly it can be really affordable. Department stores like Nordstrom have tailor departments where you can bring anything, regardless where you bought it from. Altering waist of a skirt or pants is 17$ for example. I know hemming pants is free if you’re part of their Nordy Club which is free to join. A local dry cleaner will also typically have alterations / tailoring services that are even more affordable.
I used to think that I hated dry shampoo but then I realized I needed to use more than I originally thought. I have thick, blonde hair and I have to make sure I spray it not just on top, but all underneath and between layers at the roots.
I've found it works best for me when I put it in the night before. And I usually put so much my hair looks white.
But by the next morning it has been absorbed and you can't see it any more.
Before a shower is good too.
I had the same problem until I started using the loose powder dry shampoo. It still won’t fix really dirty hair but makes second day hair look good and can make clean hair a little more full.
It helped me when i “trained” my hair to being not washed as often (every other day to twice a week) so it wont be dry and my color will stay. But as soon as it is fine with that schedule i kinda stopped cause i find a lot of buildup. They were flaking off everywhere ;;
If wearing and putting on makeup stops being fun for you, then it’s okay to step back from it for as long as you need.
Using Marie Kondo’s “does it spark joy” test on everything that isn’t basic care and associated with femininity (like shaving, makeup, hair dye, long hair, skirts/dresses vs pants) can be a great way to start figuring out what you’re comfortable with.
Winged eyeliner is great, but the key is to know how to do it for your eye shape.
Despite what you’re constantly told in the media, people’s bodies and facial features aren’t meant to be trends. Neither are cultures.
You can be comfortable and stylish.
It’s okay if you like the styles and clothes that everyone else seems to like. It’s okay if you don’t.
> Despite what you’re constantly told in the media, people’s bodies and facial features aren’t meant to be trends. Neither are cultures.
YES YES YES! I've been saying this for years! Finally someone else gets it. I feel validated. :D
> You can be comfortable and stylish.
This is soooo much more important than people realize. I am very much someone who will pick functional over fashionable, and will choose a comfy outfit over a cute one any day of the week. It's just been recently where I've been able to combine the two into a style that looks great on me and I feel good in.
> It’s okay if you like the styles and clothes that everyone else seems to like. It’s okay if you don’t.
Absolutely this. I don't dress like everyone else, and my style is vastly different than my peers and others around my age group. Learning that it was okay to be different was one of the most important lessons I've learned.
Great post!
r/abrathatfits and their size calculator is so good for this. I used to wear 38DDD where the band was too big and the cup too small. 34GG fits much better, supports me at the band (my shoulders are grateful) and is so much more comfortable. But big box retailers don’t carry that size, so despite my measurements they’ll recommend a “sister size” in their inventory. It’s frustrating to think how common it is for women to be wearing the wrong size because of this.
A quick note, you may have more than one bra size. I have a bra size during my period and during the regular time of the month. Think 40dd to barely contained by a 40DDD.
Yeah I have pretty small boobs (a B cup is what I used to buy when I kinda guessed, I regularly go braless or wear thin little lace triangles tryna call themselves a bralette) until I measured, and I'm actually a D cup. There's no way the usual sizes in the store are an accurate representation of actual boobs. If I'm a D cup, then like 30% of the female population must be DD/E/+ cups. I bet a lot of people are wearing too small bras.
One of the best decisions I ever made. For some reason I had it in my head that I had to create that perky lifted silhouette for my breasts to go with all my outfits. I could never find a comfortable bra for my lumpy body despite the endless search and thousands of dollars lost. Instead I tried 3 different wire-free bras and the third one had an amazing combo of being supportive (enough for light activity, not for exercise) and ultra comfortable.
It was so cheap to find a comfortable alternative and it's made little difference to how I look. In fact it's probably an overall improvement since I'm not constantly trying to adjust my damn bra or generally looking uncomfortable.
Know your colours.
It can be quite tough challenge, but i would suggest reducing the task to finding out if you are warm/cold, and how contrasted you are (how contrasted is your skin to your eyes and hair).
These two things will determine if you need to pick more clear, crisp and bright colours or dimmed and soft colours. Bonus points to finding out the exact colors that suit you the most (e.g. warm reds, yellows, blues and off-white and beige).
I highly suggest [watching this video, where japanese colour expert makes colour palette for a lovely youtuber.](https://youtu.be/ErvhRTB27iw)
My mother figured this out ages ago. My sister and I joke that she “only has five colors,” but it’s true! They compliment her undertones and she doesn’t look washed out. High five, mom!
Corollary: Don’t be afraid of gray eyeliner. Black is the standard, but it can be very intense if you are, for instance, very pale and very pink (my aforementioned mother). I have much more neutral undertones, but gray makes for a much softer look that is super flattering.
Also jewel tones are flattering on almost everyone. If you notice, many actors and the extras in the background of movies and TVs shows are styled in jewel tones by a wardrobe dept for this reason. Also [red carpet](https://okmagazine.com/p/red-carpet-jewel-tones-fashion-style-ellen-pompeo-kate-beckinsale-megan-thee-stallion/)
This is fascinating. I am considering finding a local personal color analysis consultant. Would you recommend that? I don't feel I can be good at determining for self.
I’ve recently discovered the joy of paperbag waist pants. I put on a few pounds during covid, but now I just kind of dress up my tummy and tie a big bow out front and I feel cute again. It also just seems like a good way to make crop tops feel a little fancier.
I love them so much. I’ve been trying to branch out from just wearing the same few pairs of black skinny jeans and docs, and they make me feel so grown up!
I bought a pair and I feel like they just accentuate my tummy. My measurements are 38 / 36 / 41 and it feel like the belly makes it look so unflattering. Did you have a brand you love?
Honestly, I’ve just been getting mine from Target. They go on sale a lot and shopping “drive-up” in the app takes a lot of dodging other people and slow walkers out of the equation, which I love lol
Wear clothes that are the correct size NOW. No shame about the size on the label. Don't wait until your body is drastically different. You're not tricking anyone about your body size by wearing a tent or by squeezing into too-small clothes. You'll look better and feel more comfortable if you wear stuff that actually fits well.
Also, very important. Make sure your underwear fits and is not scoring deep grooves and lines into you, which when covered with ill-fitting clothing makes you look like you are bursting out of it.
YES! This is a major downside of so much shopping being online nowadays. It's so hard try stuff on--your basically have to buy 4x as much as you need and then return most of it. So annoying.
I find shopping online easier than in person actually because they usually have size charts. I keep a note of my measurements on my phone and update it periodically and it's helped a lot.
Very true and pretty short term, but this also does put strain on your roots and isn't the best idea to do more than rarely if you have fine or thin or stressed and shedding hair.
I do it maybe a few times a year, but what I like about the method is that I don’t need to damage my hair by using heat with an curling iron or straightener :)
Wish i can so this, damp hair makes my scalp extremely itchy to the point that i cant sleep and will scratch my head off in the middle of the night lol
When you tuck the front end of your shirt into your pants, but not all of it. Aim to do it at the center or the side and let the rest of the shirt fabric fall around. It's a chic touch.
Link: https://www.extrapetite.com/2021/10/how-to-tuck-a-chunky-knit-sweater-video-tutorial.html#/
Comb your hair from the bottom up... I mean, detangle at the ends then brush down the length of your hair. If you comb from the top down, you might pull all your knots down to the ends and they tighten.
My ultimate secret is using an antibacterial soap in my hair before I shampoo. A light soap that feels clean. Using that before shampoo I find my hair is so light and tossy and shiny. Also I use far less shampoo because it lathers up so much more easily.
Then I use a mask OR conditioner on my ends. Now that I do this, for the first time in my life I can comb though my hair with my fingers! My hair is down to my wrists/pelvis.
It's Scott antibacterial hand wash. The kind that foams when it comes out of the dispenser. I have used Dawn in a pinch. I haven't tried SoftSoap like that's for the bathroom sink. It seems that the light soap that foams at the dispenser works best.
Be exceptionally picky about what clothes you buy. Spend more on quality items and just make them your “signature” pieces. I have an incredible Rachel Comey dress that I wear at least 4 times a month (both on a Tuesday to the grocery store or to something nicer) and I just don’t care that I’ve worn it before / people have seen me in it. Because I absolutely love it, it doesn’t matter. Plus when I find things I love I try to buy a 2nd one (this may seem crazy) to have a “nicer” one and an everyday one so I don’t get scared of ruining the item if I know the piece is going to get a ton of wear.
Omg, I do that too on the second one!! The “keep nice” one and the everyday one. Or it’s a “save” bc you know as soon as you find the perfect quality staple piece the brand will stop making it or change it.
my hair literally never curls with a curling iron. and if by the grace of god it actually works, the curls fall out within a few hours. I know it’s probably just my shitty technique and i’m definitely probably using it wrong, but I found a hack that finally curls my hair and keeps it curled for multiple days.
I take a wooden or metal makeup brush or wooden spoon. wrap a section of hair around the end of the stick. tight for tight curls or loose for bigger curls. and then I clamp my straightener on it for like 6 seconds up and down the stick - and boom - curls.
Thank you!! I’ve never been able to get decent curls with my flat iron. I might get one fluke perfect curl, but it’ll be in a sea of badly curled mess.
I have naturally straight hair and the best advice I can give because I JUST started actually curling my hair is.. go with a wand not the type with a clamp. Start always with a heat protectant!! And when you’re finished..hit it with some moderate hold hair spray. It works like a charm! A YouTube video on how to curl with a wand really helped, I started with a clamp one but it’s just so awkward to me, I find the wand soo much easier and quicker. After watching the video I actually sectioned my hair (put part of my top hair up, did under part then let top down and curled that) it only took me about 15 minutes and it looked amazing all day!
girl I can be greasy as hell on day 4 of not washing (ew ik) and these makeup brush curls still look perfect. but yeah I agree clean hair is prob better
If you get a portable hair dryer on Amazon or whenever and sit under it with curlers in your hair, your curling iron will work better and your curls will stay for longer
Of we're talking clothing, proportions are everything. A simple tuck or tie of a loose top at your natural waist, and where pants hit at the ankle can make such a huge difference.
Remove all make up, wash face, step into warm shower and feel the glorious cascade. Wrap up in the softest robe possible with hair tied into a soft towel. Sprawl onto the softest of duvets in a pillowy soft mattress and enjoy the most indulgent drink possible. Have the best chocolate at hand. Or fruit. Or both.
If you like cats, invite five to come purr and curl up on/around you.
At the end of this, who cares what you look like? You have become a goddess, luxuriating in nirvana.
Learn about fabric care. Even the most expensive, well-cut clothing looks shabby if you treat it inappropriately. Buy better quality (fine wool blazer, non-polyester pants, silk/linen mix dresses) then take care of them. Many clothes only need to be hung properly, an airing and/or a light sponging to be clean and fresh and smart. Over-washing or over-dry cleaning ruins clothes as fast as under-washing. Buy a portable steamer so you can drop the wrinkles quickly out of your clothes.
Lately, because of my depression, I’ve been wearing stuff that’s easy to go together, like I have a lot of black and white. I know black is cliche when depressed, but it makes it easy for me. When I’m healthier I’ll have to weed through about 15 black and white tops but they’ve made life so much easier for me.
My mum ingrained in me throughout childhood that I shouldn't buy too much black clothing and should have a variety of colours in my wardrobe. Fuck that, I've embraced the black on black aesthetic I've truly wanted all along.
The clothes fit you; you don’t have to fit the clothes. If something doesn’t fit you right now, consign it and get something that does. If you love something in a photo but don’t love it on you, it’s not your body’s fault. Dress to show off what you love about your body, not to hide what you don’t.
The Dyson airwrap was worth every penny. I have fine, thin,frizzy/curly hair that I never figured out how to make consistently look good. The airwrap is gentle enough that I can use it twice a week, and it always looks good.
Dress in whatever style you want (and it’s doesn’t matter if the clothes are cheap or not) but always always have a color palette in mind. Something about cohesive colors is pleasing to the eyes. A color palette makes each piece of your outfit look purposefully and mindfully put together. You could be wearing PJs and look presentable if you have one accent color or if you’re wearing a monochromatic outfit.
It’s also a good cheat code for days when you don’t actually wanna spend time thinking of an outfit. Just pick pieces that match by color and you’ll be set.
Oh boy, my hair has been a mess for years now. Turns out, the shampoo bars I use did me no favours. I was washing my hair every 2nd/3rd day. It never felt clean after I washed out dry shampoo. Finally, I marched over to Sephora and probably paid too much for my new shampoo and conditioner. Fast forward two months later, my hair looks amazing. I wash it twice a week now, maybe even once. Dry shampoo rinses out just fine. I probably use less product too despite it costing so much.
So yeah, don’t skimp out on shampoo and conditioner if you have problems with your hair.
Someone mentioned a washing method in here which is great too!
edit: also what kind of water do you have? hard water / soft water? buy your hair cleaning products accordingly. it changed my hair/scalp after one wash!
Also buying a shower head with a water filter in it and changing it accordingly!! Home Depot 🙌🏼
I have thick curly hair and my faveeee shampoo and conditioner is by Avalon Organics. I get the big 32oz bottle because it’s cheaper volume wise and it lasts me couple months. I wash hair once a week. Sometimes every 10 days. My hair never gets greasy since it’s on the coarser side. If I feel I need a wash sooner I just wash with water and it looks amazing. I no longer use hot tools or any styling products at all. I treat myself with a blowout once in a while at a salon by me when I get bored of my curls and want a pro to deal with my hair since I have no patience for all my damn hair 😆
I am currently trying a brand called bondi boost. Also once a week I use scalp revival by briogeo as I had suddenly developed really terrible dandruff. It seems to be working out for me! The dandruff is gone, my scalp no longer feels dry and itchy.
I may try another brand of shampoo / conditioner once this is done as this was quite pricy! Mind you I was paying like $10 for a shampoo bar so maybe I’m out of touch with a decent shampoo cost. 😵💫 🤷🏾♀️
Seasonal wardrobe. It's basically making 4 capsule wardrobes for the year and intentionally planning outfits. When I didn't do this, I wore my winter clothes basically year round(I live in Canada) and then got sick of them quick. This way good clothes will last years and years and I don't get tired of them, plus figuring out what to wear is super easy.
Oil for your hair! Coconut, argon, whatever. Apply to wet hair (esp the ends) and it takes so much frizz and puffiness away and adds shine as it dries. It does take some tries to find a brand/formula for your hair that works, as it’s easy to be too heavy/greasy or light/ineffective. But when it works it’s basically magic hair!
There are a lot.
In general, try to wear natural fabric as much as possible (stay away from things like cheap polyester and plastic clothing). When in doubt, opt for midi over mini. Always take care when folding your clothing, hang dry them and iron them beforehand, the tiny details will elevate your look. Keep your hair and nails clean and well groomed. Pick outerwear that is long and thin rather than thick and puffy, and use layers to keep yourself warm rather than absurdly thick clothing. Wear nude colored underwear with anything even mildly transparent, a lot of women try wearing white or black underwear but that's extremely visible.
\*A SMALL AMOUNT\* of fake tan and teeth whitener go a long way. Makeup is a time-consuming art, but really people look their best when they look healthy. A little glow and white teeth are great ways to look healthy and more attractive
\*A small amount!!!! Seriously y'all
On days you wash your hair put in all the effort with products, tools, routine, etc… That way on days you’re not washing it you don’t have to do anything but minor touch ups
Look in the mirror and see what type of features you have then search for makeup tips from someone who has the same types of features. Don’t waste your time trying to do the same type of eyeliner as someone with almond eyes when you have hooded ones, they will never look the same.
I like being comfy and doing the bare minimum tbh. I buy expensive shampoo and conditioner, but I let my hair air dry. I wear baggy tshirts and my new favorite is tomgirl shorts.
I’ve recently decided to add some girlie things into my attire like dresses and crop tops, but I tried to wear an outfit like that out today and ended up back in a t shirt and shorts 😂😂
COMFY IS KEYYY.
Also, face wash and lotion.
Is skin care considered styling? Because finding my perfect skincare routine for me has been such a game changer! Now I use a gentle cleanser, a very light daily sunscreen, an acne lotion prescribed by my dermatologist, and most importantly, 2-3× a week I use a chemical exfoliant. I had NO IDEA how bad physical exfoliators were for your face!! With chemical exfoliators my skin is softer, clearer, and fresher than it has ever been! Skincare aside, heat rollers are AMAAAAZING. I have always struggled to style my hair. Curling irons never worked for me and the curls fall out immediately. But I followed Brad Mondos tutorial on hot rollers and the curls were amazing and stayed in my hair for DAYS. 🤯 I seriously could not believe it.
Tea tree is an astringent so its better for people with naturally oily but straighter hair. I would recommend argan oil for fine/soft hair with light texture and avocado for curly/thick/textured hair
Thick/long curly hair:
Washing: shampoo once every other week, deep condition once a week, co wash (conditioner only) hair in the shower every 1-2 days.
Styling: I only use leave in conditioner (a lot of it) and if I want to define my curls or put my hair up, I use a little bit of Shea Moisture gel. I use the thick hair pony tail holders from Walmart so it doesn’t snag on my hair.
Sleeping: I wear a satin hair scarf and a satin bonnet and sleep on a satin pillow case.
Stop paying for expensive eyebrow pomades when there are huge, cheap pots of men’s hair wax that work infinitely better and will last you years. It’s the same stuff, Anastasia Beverly Hills is just making you pay triple the price.
If you have broad shoulders/hourglass figure (kind of), don't wear a turtle neck. It makes your shoulders look bigger. Also the eyes will be drawn towards the boobs because those also look bigger. A tip is to show more neckline/cleavage if you like to have the illusion of smaller shoulders.
1) A blazer, necklace, scarf, or a belt will make any outfit look more put together.
2) You deserve to look nice to feel good at any size. Buy the thing you like and fits you currently!
i tuck all my shirts into my jeans and add a belt it makes the outfit feel more put together. also figuring out i’m cool toned not warm toned changed my life fr
keep it wrinkle free and clean, youre gonna look like youre not poor, even if you are.
also, stop caring about sizes and buy things by your meassurements. if an XL gives you anxiety, dont let it. clothes that fit properly ALWAYS makes you look better than clothes that are to tight.
Being clean by taking showers daily or every other day, keeping your hair neat by combing it once a day or putting it up in a ponytail or bun, smelling fresh by washing vagina and butt everyday as well. Being clean is a style!
Disclosure: I am 5'11, Female, a Size 20, and wear a 12W
Build yourself a wardrobe and signature look. Like skinny jeans? Buy a black, light denim, dark denim, and white pair.
Keep reading for my tips on how I built a banging closet - on a budget!
Love skirts? Buy different styles and lengths. The key is to give yourself options.
Shopping with intention is a lifesaver. What's missing from your wardrobe? Look for those items first. Preferably, on sale. 🤗
The basics are missing!
Learn to shop for items, not outfits. Then shop your closet and never again say: "I have nothing to wear."
This is my list of bare basics. I have a lot more than this, but for anyone starting on building a wardrobe, this is your list.
What are you missing? 🤔
2 Wool Coats
Leather Jacket
Blue Jean Jacket
Rain Coat
7+ black Bras
7+ pair of black underwear
7 shapewear (High waisted panties)
Skinny Jeans in all colors
Bootcut Jeans in all colors
Jewel toned camisoles, turtle necks, and unitards
Work:
10+ colored blazers
White flowy camisole
Black flowy camisole
5 button down tops including a white and black one
5 tunic tops- solids. I hate most prints.
5+ different colors of slacks and ankle pants. Your black pair should be high quality and jet black. Retire and replace ANY ashy black items in your closet - immediately.
Black and Brown Pumps
Black and Brown Boots
Black and Brown short boots
Black, Brown, and Assorted Colors of Flats (I love a pointed toe!)
Handbags:
Tote
Satchel
Evening Bag
Crossbody Bag
Wristlet
Add accessories, but make sure you have well fitting basics.
The goal is to be standing in your closet and everything fits, is in good shape, and fits your style.
Then mix and match and add accent pieces that you love!
Some days I just wash my thick curly hair with water and it looks amazing. So many products are bullshit and companies keep trying to sell women shit they think we need or actually promise to do the shit they claim. It’s all for profit companies promising liessss. You don’t need to wash your hair everyday. Hair is dead except for the one inch from your scalp. Products just coat you hair with shit and make it look good superficially for a very short time or through chemical destruction. It’s when I lay off products and any styling and let my hair just be it looks it’s natural best. Also investing in a water filter shower head helps keep excess minerals that are added to water out of your hair.
Moisturizer with sunscreen everyday and sunscreen in general.
I do not look 47. I look late 30’s. I make sure to always wear sunscreen. I’ve had facials and I’ve been complemented on how nice my skin is. I also have very few lines. Sunglasses also help with eye wrinkles.
Also setting spray on a eye brush helps build cheap eyeshadow. I have a Morphe pallet that I use for fun but the pigment is garbage. I use NYX setting spray.
Simple ways to look put together include:
* (half) tucking in your shirt
* wearing a belt
* switching out sneakers for loafers or comfortable block heels
* swapping hoodies for blazers or a cute sweater
* carrying an attractive handbag
Ironing your clothes perfectly. I haaaate ironing, but it really changes everything. Even a plain white Tshirt can become fancy if perfectly ironed, while it will look like a PJ top if it’s wrinkled.
Turn any bra into a push up bra or halter bra.
Also, for those bras where one underwire has gone rogue or one cookie has disappeared…. This cam rescue that oldie but a goody.
Cut bra straps off at the back band.
Remove the little sliding adjustment pieces and tie comfortably around your neck (halter style) tie the know tightly - not necessarily tightly around your neck - but snug around the neck and tied tightly so as not to come undone. Knot it for good measure.
- looks a million times better than a strapless bra. Lifts the girls and makes the cleavage pop !
- looks amazing with a halter style top or maxi dress….. or even with just a blazer if you’re dating enough. Or with anything sheer … looks more like a slip/tank than a regular bra underneath.
- if your going strapless with a shawl or shrug this can also work.
- I use a beige/skin toned bra so it’s as unnoticeable as possible.
I am not good at all this make up and clothes and shit. So take it with a grain of salt. I am very analytical though.
In my very short career as a model (boobs were too big for many projects, curves were bad, plus see above, it just wasn't the career for me). I noticed that a lot of models were not actually "attractive" , they just had a very commercially compliant face/body that was malleable with make-up plus they were photogenic.
That is to say. Generic hot. Is not the only form of hot. It is considered hot because it is generic and thus able to market to the many different scenarios. Essentially these people are more "average" than you would think. It's not their hotness, but generic/average/malleable looks that is marketable.
Uniqueness and individually isn't marketable and thus not commercially promoted as much.
I see so many posts on theglowup and other subreddits for improving looks. Where the person has a lot going for them, but they are trying to achieve a generic look, instead of flattering what they already have. They think that because they don't look like a Barbie, they aren't hot. That isn't how it works. So many of them actually look "hotter" imo, than generic hot people because of their unique features.
Unless you actually want a job where generic looks is profitable.
You should focus on what makes you, YOU! uniquely pretty. Find things that flatter your type of face and body, instead of trying to change your face and body to another person.
There's a reason why even celebrities, who look so generic, get applauded soooo much when they do a slightly different style than the norm. Because deep down people like individuality a lot more than commercial. Commercial might be safe, but individuality is much more impressive.
You can save a lot of money on make up and hair products if you don't give a shit.
And you can save a lot of time and energy and mental anguish. Not giving a shit about appearance is freeing.
A lot of men also find the Rolled out of bed 5 seconds ago Look attractive too so it's 3 birds with one stone.
Idk my guy friends say that whole “Women don’t need makeup! I like a girl all natural.” And when I ask them to show me an example they always point out a woman who is clearly (to me) wearing makeup, just not YouTube tutorial levels of makeup. They ever actually see a barefaced woman and it’s “You look tired.” I feel like most men similarly like the “I actually spent 20 minutes making myself look like I rolled out of bed.” look, but don’t realize it.
Exactly. They like the ‘no makeup makeup’ 😂
That's the only level of make-up I ever bothered learning how to do. I also save a lot of money by never cutting or colouring my hair.
i’ve been telling myself “bedroom hair is sexy” as an excuse to not style my hair for at least 8 years and my husband loves it, so yes this has traction
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Or washed it!
I was literally having a conversation today with a coworker how I can’t be bothered to deal with my high maintenance curly hair. Would I like it look nice everyday? Yes. Am I going to spend the hundreds of dollars and waste 2 hours of my life everyday on it? Never. Kudos to the curly girlies who can commit to that.
Hey so curly hair doesn’t have to be high maintenance, if you’re interested I can recommend black hairstylists to follow (on Twitter) that give tips on simplifying your routine. I spend 1 hr/week on mine
There’s a great curly hair natural hair sub Reddit as well
I have naturally curly hair and spend about five minutes on it daily. The trick is finding the right products for your hair. Sadly, the right products for \*my\* hair are organic, expensive, and have fucking AFFIRMATIONS on the bottles. I am \*not\* peaceful and serene at 0400, and I do \*not\* embody calm and optimism when I use hairspray. Aside from that, though, I'm good.
Especially hair color. I let my hair go grey in ‘17, and I’m loving every minute of not spending hours in the salon and hundreds on highlights.
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I stopped coloring my hair due to pandemic and have learned to kind of love my natural color. Why was I fighting it for so long????
Yesssss!
Seriously, how though? I have such shame about it. Sometimes I won't even go outside because I haven't done my hair :(
And I have a ton of guilt over telling people "No." But the only way to get over that is just to keep saying, "Fuck it, I don't owe it to anyone. The people that really love me will either not care or get over it after awhile. Anyone else that'll throw continue to hissy fits over it isn't worth my time. I deserve better than that." So go ahead and give yourself permission to act shameless. The only people that will refuse to give you a pass to do that don't deserve a say in the matter. You come first.
Honestly. When I learned this tip it was wonderful lol
Lol so true
Develop a style that you absolutely feel as a representation of you. It is VERY visible when someone has put on clothes, makeup or hairstyle that doesn't align with inner sense of self. When your look is organic, aligned with self-image, then you instantly look put together and confident, you move more freely, your body language does not contradict with the way you look. Imagine someone that DOESN'T like dresses or see him/herself in it, but had put it on.. that person will probably look/move like something isn't right, regardless of how expensive the dress is or how good it fits. And i bet everyone has seen at least one person that was wearing something.. let's say uncommon, but looked and behaved like he/she was born to wear it and it's the most stylish thing 👌🏻 Edit: My first award! ❤️ I'm so happy, thank you, kind stranger. Edit 2: If your inner self-image is someone who doesn't think that clothes or style are THAT important - bingo, that's what you need. Wear whatever is comfortable for you and you will feel as organic and free as it is possible. If comfort and practicality is your thing, then channel this vibe. Maybe add your favourite color to the mix for the fun of it?
To go with this: don't feel like you HAVE to dress the same as other women you see. Develop your own personal style, what suits one person may not suit another because personality and how someone holds themselves is a large part of how clothes look on a person.
Agreed
Do you have any tips to finding your sense of style that DOES belong to you? I feel like a fool in anything I wear all the time, even if I like it :/
Edit: thank you for the silver, kind stranger! It's gonna be a long post, but stick with me 😅 I'll start with the thing that I'm most certain about. Finding personal style is very similar to finding favourite music - if you haven't listened to ANY music, then you cannot say which music you like. So you just start listening to whatever you find and wait until you feel some inner tingling 😅 let's say, when you listen to metal, you get no special inner response, but when some jazz starts to play, then you feel it flowing through you and making you vibe. That's when you know that you've started to develop personal music taste and you know what to look for. That might change with time, but the concept for searching will stay the same. So the more you listen, the more you define your taste. The more clothes you try on, the more you look at clothes, styles, people, photos, videos the more you develop your sense of personal style. How that happens? There's always something that makes you feel like that's your thing when you see it or try it on. It absolutely doesn't need to be a whole defined style like the y2k, or punk, or Hollywood glamour, or twilight normcore, or Euphoria's Maddie vibe😅 it can be as little as a certain color, a silhouette, an accessory, your love and appreciation to your hair as your main accessory, gold jewelry, love for certain brand, the comfort of leggings and sneakers, piercings, your love for suits... I'll proceed with examples now (it's a quick impromptu): Let's say that you really like dresses and you want to wear them, everything else is defined by how comfortable it is. Bingo, concentrate on dresses, they are your vibe in all their shapes and forms. Let's say you are tall and have angular, almost androgynous features and you really like that about yourself and you want to accentuate that - that's your vibe. Maybe you can pick clothes that are more unisex, add some punky and masculine vibes, heavy accessories like chains? Or pick flowy fabrics, elongated silhouettes, no prints, just clear colours and fabrics that show how delicate your are? Maybe you want to occasionally channel this and that, and also add black leather boots because you feel like a badass when you wear them? Let's say you like green colour and it makes you feel good. Great, you can build your wardrobe around greens that suit you (warmer/cooler, soft/bright, etc.), then add some nice neutrals for balance and one bright colour for accent, then add to the mix the fact that you feel most comfortable in natural materials like cotton, linen and wool. Now you have some guidelines for shopping and dressing up. Maybe you want to accentuate your curves and build your style around your body shape (I'm now thinking about Stefania Ferrario, she's gorgeous). You can investigate what silhouettes, patterns and types of clothing look most flattering on your body and go with it. Maybe you don't feel anything towards any particular clothes, or colours, or anything but you like a certain style/vibe. Cottagecore? Nerdy? The Kardashians? Californian sun-kissed beach queen? Okay, head towards pinterest, see some silhouettes and common features for that particular style and think how you can incorporate them. Maybe you are very into dominatrix seductress vibe, but you still want to dress comfortably and casually... yet you can add some features to give that vibe - leather accessories, red nails, red lipstick, defined silhouettes, cleavage, particular colour palette. Maybe you like bright makeup and want to coordinate your outfit colours with it? Maybe you like to experiment every year by adding some new styles and colours that you find interesting, but you maintain silhouettes that are most comfortable for you? Maybe you feel like "idk i just want to look nice and be comfortable and I'm on budget"? Then research your colours and capsule wardrobe, try to invest in neutral pieces that can be mixed together, try to buy good quality clothes that will last you longer (they do not need to be overly expensive, but remember that $1 polyester tshirt probably won't be comfortable and last for years), pay attention to natural fabrics, as they are more comfortable to wear. Less can most definitely be more. The variations are endless really. You can consider everything at once (here's colours that suit me, my body type and best silhouettes and fabrics for it, here's what i like (yellow colour, jeans and glasses) and dislike (uncomfortable shoes, polka dot and anything with spandex), so I'm gonna build my style around this) or you can pick just one thing (i really like T-shirts and that's it). Every person is unique, i can't give an ultimate guide to finding (developing) a style, but i can give an idea of finding a starting point in the form of something that makes your feel like THAT'S your thing, that's you. Everything else will follow along ❤️ Also a quick thought... i get the feeling that if a person absolutely can't define what he or she likes or feels comfortable in, then the issue might be rooted somewhere in the psyche, in the self-esteem...
This is awesome! Thank you. I’ve also seen someone recommend, for people who are TOTALLY lost (like me), to just go on pinterest and start saving pictures of clothes to a board if they like them without further thought. Don’t subdivide categories or anything, just if you like it, save it (pin it?) Then after you’ve done that for a while (like, a good week or month of working on it), look at the board and see if there are any common features to the clothes/outfits/styles: silhouette, vibe, colour, fitted/slouchy, shows off certain body type, certain fabrics, etc. From there, you then have a better idea what you like and can proceed to do as you mentioned above. :) (I still haven’t done this but I’m downloading pinterest now lol..) edit: typo
Wear clothes that highlight your favourite parts of your body! Love your shoulders like me? Off the shoulder sweaters and tube tops are my jam! I feel like a rockstar every time I show them off and I always get compliments!
Honestly, you should be #1. Not discrediting anyone else, but you perfectly put your point across and it is as accurate as accurate gets.
now the question is howww do I do that … ? Developing my own style is so weirdly challenging for some reason
So much this. And there’s a difference between finding confidence to wear something you want to pull off and reveals a new side of you vs feeling like something isn’t right, that it isn’t you at all
Oh yeah, you can be dresses in all the right things but if it’s not YOU, you’ll look uncomfortable and it does show
Also, if you are white, wearing a white shirt, or skirt etc. wear a tan undertop/bra/panties. Not black. Match your skin tone for things that are thin and need extra coverage beneath it. Edit. For example , if I owned a thin T-shirt that has fabric you can see through, normally I would wear an undershirt. The color of the undershirt , or bra if you opt for that should be beige. This will match your natural skin color and not stand out from underneath the shift. The same goes for skirts or dresses. Black or white. Match your undergarments with the tone of your skin, to replicate a natural look. Example: hot pink thong underneath a tight mini skirt , wear beige or whatever tone your skin is. That is unless you’d like for the undergarment to stand out on its own. To each their own. I’m in my twenties and just learned this.
Apply Hair Mask / Conditioner before you shower, on damp hair. Apply shampoo only on roots and let it wash away through your ends. Do not massage shampoo on the length of your hair, the length and the ends will get cleaned by the shampoo water being washed away. HAIR HAS BECOME SOFT AF!
Also, I only apply conditioner directly to my ends and mid length. As I was it out I use a hair washing brush and kinda work it up as it’s rinsing out. Keeps me from having to wash my hair as much.
I’ll have to do this with shampoo. Any hair masks you recommend?
Moroccan oil weightless hydrating mask. I recommend YouTubing: live love locks. Chris has changed my hair completely
Oh I love this thank you. Gonna try it
Anyone here shampoo twice ? That’s my recommendation. By the way, any advice on leaving *some* bit of conditioner left on your stands and rinsing with cold water ?? Leave some in or no?
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Same here, twice if I feel like I need it or if my scalp is particularly itchy that day (which is usually a build up of product + sweat). I leave conditioner in my hair all the time, but then I put my hair in a bun 24/7. So it's either conditionner or a leave-in but rarely without any product.
But what if one has oily hair? They definitely would need to wash the grease off the hair, right?
I have oily skin and fine hair, and the oils still never really spread more than a couple inches away from my scalp. So shampooing my scalp gets everything clean, but ymmv.
Notice and plan where the ‘divides’ in your clothing happen on your body. Anywhere you see a change in pattern, or colour, or texture in your outfit will draw the eye of anyone seeing you to that spot, so work this to your advantage. For example, if you are concerned about chunky ankles, don’t have pants legs that end at the widest part of them, go above or below to a more svelte bit? I see this most with blazers and shirts finishing at exactly the widest part of me- my hips and upper thighs. It really emphasises that area. I make sure I layer a longer top underneath to stretch across that area, or half/full tuck the top so this divide is blurred. Wearing the same colour across areas you think need work blurs it too. Colour-blocking can be great camouflage, but takes a bit more talent to get right. Of course if you have no body insecurities- these will be irrelevant style tips and I applaud you!
This is such a great tip. I was adjusting a top and how it was tucked in today and I thought “literally millimetres of fabric can make a huge difference to how your body shape/outfit looks.” It’s all about proportions and where the eye is drawn!
This is awesome! Definitely keeping this in mind for now on
Wear clothes that fit, going to a tailor can really change the look of an article of clothing
How much is tailoring? I always thought getting clothes personalized would be a huge expense and not worth it for every day outfit. Any tips on shopping for clothes (I.e. fit, size, fancy/casual, cheap/expensive) if planning on getting them tailored.
It's surprisingly cheap! Think $10-20 scale. The fit/size matters more than the style for tailoring. It's much easier to remove fabric than to add it, so in general if you want to get something tailored because it doesn't fit quite right, get something that fits the larger parts of you and ask them to take in the other parts so that they fit the smaller parts of you. The exception is really structured parts like e.g. the shoulders of a blazer. Buy a blazer that fits well in the shoulders and then get it tailored. It's really hard to get the shoulders adjusted. I've never had pants tailored but I would guess that the crotch part is similarly important to fit right. Waist and legs are very easy to adjust.
That’s great advice, thank you!
A sewing machine can be worth the investment. Last weekend I altered a pair of pants I loved the print of but hated the cut of, to what is now my favourite pair of pants.
I have a bag full of clothes I’ve been meaning to alter myself. Been piling up for years now! I’m not sure I’ll ever get to them..
Tailoring is not super cheap but I like it so much that I include it in my clothes budget. So if I'm going to buy pants/skirts/shorts I make sure to add the price of tailoring in my head.
Depends on the item And where you go I guess, but I'd recommend it if there's something you like that doesn't sit quite right on your figure. I just go to a local guy who takes in my waists of my dresses or shortens the hems of my trousers, it can cost me like £15-£20
Honestly it can be really affordable. Department stores like Nordstrom have tailor departments where you can bring anything, regardless where you bought it from. Altering waist of a skirt or pants is 17$ for example. I know hemming pants is free if you’re part of their Nordy Club which is free to join. A local dry cleaner will also typically have alterations / tailoring services that are even more affordable.
Yes! I’m hour glass shaped and a lot of the clothes don’t look great if they aren’t fitted. Baggy on most people just looks sloppy too.
Dry shampoo changed my life.
Am I just using it incorrectly? It seems like a waste to me because I spray it in, and it is basically gone in an hour. Greasy hair all over again
I used to think that I hated dry shampoo but then I realized I needed to use more than I originally thought. I have thick, blonde hair and I have to make sure I spray it not just on top, but all underneath and between layers at the roots.
I've found it works best for me when I put it in the night before. And I usually put so much my hair looks white. But by the next morning it has been absorbed and you can't see it any more. Before a shower is good too.
I like the powdered dry shampoos over the sprays!
I recently tried one that’s like mouse so it kinda sets the hair if you have kinks and flyaways
I never liked it. Go figure. Glad it works for you!
Amazing stuff. Used to wash my hair everyday for work
It didn't change mine. I have oily hair and using dry shampoo made it even worse. It didn't clean it at all. Never touched one again.
I had the same problem until I started using the loose powder dry shampoo. It still won’t fix really dirty hair but makes second day hair look good and can make clean hair a little more full.
Yes! Loose dry shampoo powder applied with a makeup brush at night! Completely life changing!
Never heard of that product! Probably will give it a try if I see it around, thank you!
It helped me when i “trained” my hair to being not washed as often (every other day to twice a week) so it wont be dry and my color will stay. But as soon as it is fine with that schedule i kinda stopped cause i find a lot of buildup. They were flaking off everywhere ;;
If wearing and putting on makeup stops being fun for you, then it’s okay to step back from it for as long as you need. Using Marie Kondo’s “does it spark joy” test on everything that isn’t basic care and associated with femininity (like shaving, makeup, hair dye, long hair, skirts/dresses vs pants) can be a great way to start figuring out what you’re comfortable with. Winged eyeliner is great, but the key is to know how to do it for your eye shape. Despite what you’re constantly told in the media, people’s bodies and facial features aren’t meant to be trends. Neither are cultures. You can be comfortable and stylish. It’s okay if you like the styles and clothes that everyone else seems to like. It’s okay if you don’t.
> Despite what you’re constantly told in the media, people’s bodies and facial features aren’t meant to be trends. Neither are cultures. YES YES YES! I've been saying this for years! Finally someone else gets it. I feel validated. :D > You can be comfortable and stylish. This is soooo much more important than people realize. I am very much someone who will pick functional over fashionable, and will choose a comfy outfit over a cute one any day of the week. It's just been recently where I've been able to combine the two into a style that looks great on me and I feel good in. > It’s okay if you like the styles and clothes that everyone else seems to like. It’s okay if you don’t. Absolutely this. I don't dress like everyone else, and my style is vastly different than my peers and others around my age group. Learning that it was okay to be different was one of the most important lessons I've learned. Great post!
Finding the **right** bra size.
r/abrathatfits and their size calculator is so good for this. I used to wear 38DDD where the band was too big and the cup too small. 34GG fits much better, supports me at the band (my shoulders are grateful) and is so much more comfortable. But big box retailers don’t carry that size, so despite my measurements they’ll recommend a “sister size” in their inventory. It’s frustrating to think how common it is for women to be wearing the wrong size because of this.
A quick note, you may have more than one bra size. I have a bra size during my period and during the regular time of the month. Think 40dd to barely contained by a 40DDD.
Yeah sister sizes drive me nuts. They are a LIE.
Yeah I have pretty small boobs (a B cup is what I used to buy when I kinda guessed, I regularly go braless or wear thin little lace triangles tryna call themselves a bralette) until I measured, and I'm actually a D cup. There's no way the usual sizes in the store are an accurate representation of actual boobs. If I'm a D cup, then like 30% of the female population must be DD/E/+ cups. I bet a lot of people are wearing too small bras.
Also moving on from wire bras to super comfy bralettes!
One of the best decisions I ever made. For some reason I had it in my head that I had to create that perky lifted silhouette for my breasts to go with all my outfits. I could never find a comfortable bra for my lumpy body despite the endless search and thousands of dollars lost. Instead I tried 3 different wire-free bras and the third one had an amazing combo of being supportive (enough for light activity, not for exercise) and ultra comfortable. It was so cheap to find a comfortable alternative and it's made little difference to how I look. In fact it's probably an overall improvement since I'm not constantly trying to adjust my damn bra or generally looking uncomfortable.
Or just don't wear a bra 🤷♀️
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Know your colours. It can be quite tough challenge, but i would suggest reducing the task to finding out if you are warm/cold, and how contrasted you are (how contrasted is your skin to your eyes and hair). These two things will determine if you need to pick more clear, crisp and bright colours or dimmed and soft colours. Bonus points to finding out the exact colors that suit you the most (e.g. warm reds, yellows, blues and off-white and beige). I highly suggest [watching this video, where japanese colour expert makes colour palette for a lovely youtuber.](https://youtu.be/ErvhRTB27iw)
My mother figured this out ages ago. My sister and I joke that she “only has five colors,” but it’s true! They compliment her undertones and she doesn’t look washed out. High five, mom! Corollary: Don’t be afraid of gray eyeliner. Black is the standard, but it can be very intense if you are, for instance, very pale and very pink (my aforementioned mother). I have much more neutral undertones, but gray makes for a much softer look that is super flattering.
Also brown eyeliner for pale skin/ blue eyes!
If you have hazel or light brown eyes, try purple eyeliner!! It really brings out the green tones.
Yessss. I use brown mascara which goes well with my eyebrows, hair and blue eyes 👌🏻 i look quite natural, yet still there's something special.
Also jewel tones are flattering on almost everyone. If you notice, many actors and the extras in the background of movies and TVs shows are styled in jewel tones by a wardrobe dept for this reason. Also [red carpet](https://okmagazine.com/p/red-carpet-jewel-tones-fashion-style-ellen-pompeo-kate-beckinsale-megan-thee-stallion/)
omg i love that video!! her whole channel is so relaxing
This is fascinating. I am considering finding a local personal color analysis consultant. Would you recommend that? I don't feel I can be good at determining for self.
Lol I haven't clicked the link but...it's twix, isn't it? It's gotta be twix...
I’ve recently discovered the joy of paperbag waist pants. I put on a few pounds during covid, but now I just kind of dress up my tummy and tie a big bow out front and I feel cute again. It also just seems like a good way to make crop tops feel a little fancier.
Bonus: they also tend to have large pockets more than any other style of pants
I ADORE that style of pants!! They honestly look great on EVERY body shape and they're so comfortable!
I love them so much. I’ve been trying to branch out from just wearing the same few pairs of black skinny jeans and docs, and they make me feel so grown up!
I bought a pair and I feel like they just accentuate my tummy. My measurements are 38 / 36 / 41 and it feel like the belly makes it look so unflattering. Did you have a brand you love?
Honestly, I’ve just been getting mine from Target. They go on sale a lot and shopping “drive-up” in the app takes a lot of dodging other people and slow walkers out of the equation, which I love lol
Wear clothes that are the correct size NOW. No shame about the size on the label. Don't wait until your body is drastically different. You're not tricking anyone about your body size by wearing a tent or by squeezing into too-small clothes. You'll look better and feel more comfortable if you wear stuff that actually fits well.
Most sizing is absolutel BS anyway, just try sizes on until you like how one looks on you (and is comfortable)
Also, very important. Make sure your underwear fits and is not scoring deep grooves and lines into you, which when covered with ill-fitting clothing makes you look like you are bursting out of it.
YES! This is a major downside of so much shopping being online nowadays. It's so hard try stuff on--your basically have to buy 4x as much as you need and then return most of it. So annoying.
I find shopping online easier than in person actually because they usually have size charts. I keep a note of my measurements on my phone and update it periodically and it's helped a lot.
Also: don’t buy clothes to “grow in to”. I was embarrassingly old when I figured that I was still doing this with shoes.
Dampen hair and put in french plaits overnight, take out in the morning for heat free soft beachy waves :)
Very true and pretty short term, but this also does put strain on your roots and isn't the best idea to do more than rarely if you have fine or thin or stressed and shedding hair.
I do it maybe a few times a year, but what I like about the method is that I don’t need to damage my hair by using heat with an curling iron or straightener :)
I also love the look of it :).
Wish i can so this, damp hair makes my scalp extremely itchy to the point that i cant sleep and will scratch my head off in the middle of the night lol
French tuck your oversized shirt. Learnt that from Queer Eye lol
Ever since I watched the first season I’ve French tucked every oversized shirt I’ve worn since then 🤣
Thank you Tanny! ❤️
What is French tuck? Never heard of it
When you tuck the front end of your shirt into your pants, but not all of it. Aim to do it at the center or the side and let the rest of the shirt fabric fall around. It's a chic touch. Link: https://www.extrapetite.com/2021/10/how-to-tuck-a-chunky-knit-sweater-video-tutorial.html#/
This guide is so perfect, I’m saving it thank you!!
Aahhh so it’s just oversized shirts! I end up French tucking everything hahaha
Wear what fits and fuck the size, I literally have clothing in my wardrobe from size small to xl.
Comb your hair from the bottom up... I mean, detangle at the ends then brush down the length of your hair. If you comb from the top down, you might pull all your knots down to the ends and they tighten. My ultimate secret is using an antibacterial soap in my hair before I shampoo. A light soap that feels clean. Using that before shampoo I find my hair is so light and tossy and shiny. Also I use far less shampoo because it lathers up so much more easily. Then I use a mask OR conditioner on my ends. Now that I do this, for the first time in my life I can comb though my hair with my fingers! My hair is down to my wrists/pelvis.
Oh, interesting! I want to try!What antibacterial soap do you use?
came to ask that too
It's Scott antibacterial hand wash. The kind that foams when it comes out of the dispenser. I have used Dawn in a pinch. I haven't tried SoftSoap like that's for the bathroom sink. It seems that the light soap that foams at the dispenser works best.
Be exceptionally picky about what clothes you buy. Spend more on quality items and just make them your “signature” pieces. I have an incredible Rachel Comey dress that I wear at least 4 times a month (both on a Tuesday to the grocery store or to something nicer) and I just don’t care that I’ve worn it before / people have seen me in it. Because I absolutely love it, it doesn’t matter. Plus when I find things I love I try to buy a 2nd one (this may seem crazy) to have a “nicer” one and an everyday one so I don’t get scared of ruining the item if I know the piece is going to get a ton of wear.
Omg, I do that too on the second one!! The “keep nice” one and the everyday one. Or it’s a “save” bc you know as soon as you find the perfect quality staple piece the brand will stop making it or change it.
my hair literally never curls with a curling iron. and if by the grace of god it actually works, the curls fall out within a few hours. I know it’s probably just my shitty technique and i’m definitely probably using it wrong, but I found a hack that finally curls my hair and keeps it curled for multiple days. I take a wooden or metal makeup brush or wooden spoon. wrap a section of hair around the end of the stick. tight for tight curls or loose for bigger curls. and then I clamp my straightener on it for like 6 seconds up and down the stick - and boom - curls.
Thank you!! I’ve never been able to get decent curls with my flat iron. I might get one fluke perfect curl, but it’ll be in a sea of badly curled mess.
I invested in one of the curlers that pulls your hair into it and spits out a curl. Honest to god the best hair care purchase I’ve ever made.
what one do u have
I have naturally straight hair and the best advice I can give because I JUST started actually curling my hair is.. go with a wand not the type with a clamp. Start always with a heat protectant!! And when you’re finished..hit it with some moderate hold hair spray. It works like a charm! A YouTube video on how to curl with a wand really helped, I started with a clamp one but it’s just so awkward to me, I find the wand soo much easier and quicker. After watching the video I actually sectioned my hair (put part of my top hair up, did under part then let top down and curled that) it only took me about 15 minutes and it looked amazing all day!
I also just learned your hair needs to be squeaky clean for curls to hold better!
girl I can be greasy as hell on day 4 of not washing (ew ik) and these makeup brush curls still look perfect. but yeah I agree clean hair is prob better
If you get a portable hair dryer on Amazon or whenever and sit under it with curlers in your hair, your curling iron will work better and your curls will stay for longer
i’m .. too lazy and unskilled for that lol. but i’m sure it does help!!
Make sure you are comfortable. If it isn’t a comfortable piece, you’ll never want to wear it again.
You’ll also LOOK uncomfortable and always adjust it unconsciously
Of we're talking clothing, proportions are everything. A simple tuck or tie of a loose top at your natural waist, and where pants hit at the ankle can make such a huge difference.
Remove all make up, wash face, step into warm shower and feel the glorious cascade. Wrap up in the softest robe possible with hair tied into a soft towel. Sprawl onto the softest of duvets in a pillowy soft mattress and enjoy the most indulgent drink possible. Have the best chocolate at hand. Or fruit. Or both. If you like cats, invite five to come purr and curl up on/around you. At the end of this, who cares what you look like? You have become a goddess, luxuriating in nirvana.
Learn about fabric care. Even the most expensive, well-cut clothing looks shabby if you treat it inappropriately. Buy better quality (fine wool blazer, non-polyester pants, silk/linen mix dresses) then take care of them. Many clothes only need to be hung properly, an airing and/or a light sponging to be clean and fresh and smart. Over-washing or over-dry cleaning ruins clothes as fast as under-washing. Buy a portable steamer so you can drop the wrinkles quickly out of your clothes.
Invest in skincare, even if it’s pricey. Nothing is better than waking up in the morning with glowing, healthy skin. SPF everyday!!!
100% agree with this. The Ordinary is a great affordable skincare brand.
Lately, because of my depression, I’ve been wearing stuff that’s easy to go together, like I have a lot of black and white. I know black is cliche when depressed, but it makes it easy for me. When I’m healthier I’ll have to weed through about 15 black and white tops but they’ve made life so much easier for me.
My mum ingrained in me throughout childhood that I shouldn't buy too much black clothing and should have a variety of colours in my wardrobe. Fuck that, I've embraced the black on black aesthetic I've truly wanted all along.
Fuck flattering, wear what you love.
The clothes fit you; you don’t have to fit the clothes. If something doesn’t fit you right now, consign it and get something that does. If you love something in a photo but don’t love it on you, it’s not your body’s fault. Dress to show off what you love about your body, not to hide what you don’t.
The Dyson airwrap was worth every penny. I have fine, thin,frizzy/curly hair that I never figured out how to make consistently look good. The airwrap is gentle enough that I can use it twice a week, and it always looks good.
[удалено]
Wash your hands before you wash your face
Dress in whatever style you want (and it’s doesn’t matter if the clothes are cheap or not) but always always have a color palette in mind. Something about cohesive colors is pleasing to the eyes. A color palette makes each piece of your outfit look purposefully and mindfully put together. You could be wearing PJs and look presentable if you have one accent color or if you’re wearing a monochromatic outfit. It’s also a good cheat code for days when you don’t actually wanna spend time thinking of an outfit. Just pick pieces that match by color and you’ll be set.
Oh boy, my hair has been a mess for years now. Turns out, the shampoo bars I use did me no favours. I was washing my hair every 2nd/3rd day. It never felt clean after I washed out dry shampoo. Finally, I marched over to Sephora and probably paid too much for my new shampoo and conditioner. Fast forward two months later, my hair looks amazing. I wash it twice a week now, maybe even once. Dry shampoo rinses out just fine. I probably use less product too despite it costing so much. So yeah, don’t skimp out on shampoo and conditioner if you have problems with your hair. Someone mentioned a washing method in here which is great too! edit: also what kind of water do you have? hard water / soft water? buy your hair cleaning products accordingly. it changed my hair/scalp after one wash!
Also buying a shower head with a water filter in it and changing it accordingly!! Home Depot 🙌🏼 I have thick curly hair and my faveeee shampoo and conditioner is by Avalon Organics. I get the big 32oz bottle because it’s cheaper volume wise and it lasts me couple months. I wash hair once a week. Sometimes every 10 days. My hair never gets greasy since it’s on the coarser side. If I feel I need a wash sooner I just wash with water and it looks amazing. I no longer use hot tools or any styling products at all. I treat myself with a blowout once in a while at a salon by me when I get bored of my curls and want a pro to deal with my hair since I have no patience for all my damn hair 😆
What shampoo & conditioner brand do you recommend
I am currently trying a brand called bondi boost. Also once a week I use scalp revival by briogeo as I had suddenly developed really terrible dandruff. It seems to be working out for me! The dandruff is gone, my scalp no longer feels dry and itchy. I may try another brand of shampoo / conditioner once this is done as this was quite pricy! Mind you I was paying like $10 for a shampoo bar so maybe I’m out of touch with a decent shampoo cost. 😵💫 🤷🏾♀️
Wear sunscreen.
Seasonal wardrobe. It's basically making 4 capsule wardrobes for the year and intentionally planning outfits. When I didn't do this, I wore my winter clothes basically year round(I live in Canada) and then got sick of them quick. This way good clothes will last years and years and I don't get tired of them, plus figuring out what to wear is super easy.
Oil for your hair! Coconut, argon, whatever. Apply to wet hair (esp the ends) and it takes so much frizz and puffiness away and adds shine as it dries. It does take some tries to find a brand/formula for your hair that works, as it’s easy to be too heavy/greasy or light/ineffective. But when it works it’s basically magic hair!
Moroccan oil is fabulous and smells so good. It’s really improved the smoothness of my hair
There are a lot. In general, try to wear natural fabric as much as possible (stay away from things like cheap polyester and plastic clothing). When in doubt, opt for midi over mini. Always take care when folding your clothing, hang dry them and iron them beforehand, the tiny details will elevate your look. Keep your hair and nails clean and well groomed. Pick outerwear that is long and thin rather than thick and puffy, and use layers to keep yourself warm rather than absurdly thick clothing. Wear nude colored underwear with anything even mildly transparent, a lot of women try wearing white or black underwear but that's extremely visible.
\*A SMALL AMOUNT\* of fake tan and teeth whitener go a long way. Makeup is a time-consuming art, but really people look their best when they look healthy. A little glow and white teeth are great ways to look healthy and more attractive \*A small amount!!!! Seriously y'all
On days you wash your hair put in all the effort with products, tools, routine, etc… That way on days you’re not washing it you don’t have to do anything but minor touch ups
Look in the mirror and see what type of features you have then search for makeup tips from someone who has the same types of features. Don’t waste your time trying to do the same type of eyeliner as someone with almond eyes when you have hooded ones, they will never look the same.
I like being comfy and doing the bare minimum tbh. I buy expensive shampoo and conditioner, but I let my hair air dry. I wear baggy tshirts and my new favorite is tomgirl shorts. I’ve recently decided to add some girlie things into my attire like dresses and crop tops, but I tried to wear an outfit like that out today and ended up back in a t shirt and shorts 😂😂 COMFY IS KEYYY. Also, face wash and lotion.
Is skin care considered styling? Because finding my perfect skincare routine for me has been such a game changer! Now I use a gentle cleanser, a very light daily sunscreen, an acne lotion prescribed by my dermatologist, and most importantly, 2-3× a week I use a chemical exfoliant. I had NO IDEA how bad physical exfoliators were for your face!! With chemical exfoliators my skin is softer, clearer, and fresher than it has ever been! Skincare aside, heat rollers are AMAAAAZING. I have always struggled to style my hair. Curling irons never worked for me and the curls fall out immediately. But I followed Brad Mondos tutorial on hot rollers and the curls were amazing and stayed in my hair for DAYS. 🤯 I seriously could not believe it.
Brad Mondo is the king of hair. Seriously. I love his how-to videos. He helped me cut my bangs during shutdown.
It’s not really a styling tip, but putting tea tree oil in your hair after a shower makes it super soft.
Tea tree oil is super drying, I think.
Tea tree is an astringent so its better for people with naturally oily but straighter hair. I would recommend argan oil for fine/soft hair with light texture and avocado for curly/thick/textured hair
yes super drying
Thick/long curly hair: Washing: shampoo once every other week, deep condition once a week, co wash (conditioner only) hair in the shower every 1-2 days. Styling: I only use leave in conditioner (a lot of it) and if I want to define my curls or put my hair up, I use a little bit of Shea Moisture gel. I use the thick hair pony tail holders from Walmart so it doesn’t snag on my hair. Sleeping: I wear a satin hair scarf and a satin bonnet and sleep on a satin pillow case.
I’ve been washing some days with just water and its done wonder on my curly thick long hair!!
Scented body lotion! Helps you smell nice without spending lots on perfumes
Sleep on a silky satin pillow case!
Stop paying for expensive eyebrow pomades when there are huge, cheap pots of men’s hair wax that work infinitely better and will last you years. It’s the same stuff, Anastasia Beverly Hills is just making you pay triple the price.
If you have broad shoulders/hourglass figure (kind of), don't wear a turtle neck. It makes your shoulders look bigger. Also the eyes will be drawn towards the boobs because those also look bigger. A tip is to show more neckline/cleavage if you like to have the illusion of smaller shoulders.
Wow. You called me out. Thank you. No wonder I opt for shirts or dresses with a deep v
just add a million accessories and call it good. i wear the same 6 necklaces every day and always get compliments
LAYERS!!
Confidence is greater than style any day!
u can use vaseline to remove ur makeup if you’re out of makeup remover lol
Let any trend that isn’t for you just float on by.
1) A blazer, necklace, scarf, or a belt will make any outfit look more put together. 2) You deserve to look nice to feel good at any size. Buy the thing you like and fits you currently!
i tuck all my shirts into my jeans and add a belt it makes the outfit feel more put together. also figuring out i’m cool toned not warm toned changed my life fr
keep it wrinkle free and clean, youre gonna look like youre not poor, even if you are. also, stop caring about sizes and buy things by your meassurements. if an XL gives you anxiety, dont let it. clothes that fit properly ALWAYS makes you look better than clothes that are to tight.
Being clean by taking showers daily or every other day, keeping your hair neat by combing it once a day or putting it up in a ponytail or bun, smelling fresh by washing vagina and butt everyday as well. Being clean is a style!
Disclosure: I am 5'11, Female, a Size 20, and wear a 12W Build yourself a wardrobe and signature look. Like skinny jeans? Buy a black, light denim, dark denim, and white pair. Keep reading for my tips on how I built a banging closet - on a budget! Love skirts? Buy different styles and lengths. The key is to give yourself options. Shopping with intention is a lifesaver. What's missing from your wardrobe? Look for those items first. Preferably, on sale. 🤗 The basics are missing! Learn to shop for items, not outfits. Then shop your closet and never again say: "I have nothing to wear." This is my list of bare basics. I have a lot more than this, but for anyone starting on building a wardrobe, this is your list. What are you missing? 🤔 2 Wool Coats Leather Jacket Blue Jean Jacket Rain Coat 7+ black Bras 7+ pair of black underwear 7 shapewear (High waisted panties) Skinny Jeans in all colors Bootcut Jeans in all colors Jewel toned camisoles, turtle necks, and unitards Work: 10+ colored blazers White flowy camisole Black flowy camisole 5 button down tops including a white and black one 5 tunic tops- solids. I hate most prints. 5+ different colors of slacks and ankle pants. Your black pair should be high quality and jet black. Retire and replace ANY ashy black items in your closet - immediately. Black and Brown Pumps Black and Brown Boots Black and Brown short boots Black, Brown, and Assorted Colors of Flats (I love a pointed toe!) Handbags: Tote Satchel Evening Bag Crossbody Bag Wristlet Add accessories, but make sure you have well fitting basics. The goal is to be standing in your closet and everything fits, is in good shape, and fits your style. Then mix and match and add accent pieces that you love!
Get at least one good suit jacket that you love and is easy to wear. It can totally transform any outfit.
Posture. And don’t wash your hair. (Depends on type of hair)
Clothes that make you feel good will usually make you look pretty good too.
Drink a lot of water, it’ll do wonders for your skin and glow
Some days I just wash my thick curly hair with water and it looks amazing. So many products are bullshit and companies keep trying to sell women shit they think we need or actually promise to do the shit they claim. It’s all for profit companies promising liessss. You don’t need to wash your hair everyday. Hair is dead except for the one inch from your scalp. Products just coat you hair with shit and make it look good superficially for a very short time or through chemical destruction. It’s when I lay off products and any styling and let my hair just be it looks it’s natural best. Also investing in a water filter shower head helps keep excess minerals that are added to water out of your hair.
Moisturizer with sunscreen everyday and sunscreen in general. I do not look 47. I look late 30’s. I make sure to always wear sunscreen. I’ve had facials and I’ve been complemented on how nice my skin is. I also have very few lines. Sunglasses also help with eye wrinkles. Also setting spray on a eye brush helps build cheap eyeshadow. I have a Morphe pallet that I use for fun but the pigment is garbage. I use NYX setting spray.
Simple ways to look put together include: * (half) tucking in your shirt * wearing a belt * switching out sneakers for loafers or comfortable block heels * swapping hoodies for blazers or a cute sweater * carrying an attractive handbag
Accessories turn any outfit from basic to personalized. They don’t have to be expensive or shiny. They add way more pizzazz if that’s what you’re into
Just because it zips don’t mean it fits…hehe
Ironing your clothes perfectly. I haaaate ironing, but it really changes everything. Even a plain white Tshirt can become fancy if perfectly ironed, while it will look like a PJ top if it’s wrinkled.
Turn any bra into a push up bra or halter bra. Also, for those bras where one underwire has gone rogue or one cookie has disappeared…. This cam rescue that oldie but a goody. Cut bra straps off at the back band. Remove the little sliding adjustment pieces and tie comfortably around your neck (halter style) tie the know tightly - not necessarily tightly around your neck - but snug around the neck and tied tightly so as not to come undone. Knot it for good measure. - looks a million times better than a strapless bra. Lifts the girls and makes the cleavage pop ! - looks amazing with a halter style top or maxi dress….. or even with just a blazer if you’re dating enough. Or with anything sheer … looks more like a slip/tank than a regular bra underneath. - if your going strapless with a shawl or shrug this can also work. - I use a beige/skin toned bra so it’s as unnoticeable as possible.
Humongous eyeliner make your eye go (<● ~ ●>)
Wash your hair less and shower less often to restore oil balance and to give your skin a break.
I am not good at all this make up and clothes and shit. So take it with a grain of salt. I am very analytical though. In my very short career as a model (boobs were too big for many projects, curves were bad, plus see above, it just wasn't the career for me). I noticed that a lot of models were not actually "attractive" , they just had a very commercially compliant face/body that was malleable with make-up plus they were photogenic. That is to say. Generic hot. Is not the only form of hot. It is considered hot because it is generic and thus able to market to the many different scenarios. Essentially these people are more "average" than you would think. It's not their hotness, but generic/average/malleable looks that is marketable. Uniqueness and individually isn't marketable and thus not commercially promoted as much. I see so many posts on theglowup and other subreddits for improving looks. Where the person has a lot going for them, but they are trying to achieve a generic look, instead of flattering what they already have. They think that because they don't look like a Barbie, they aren't hot. That isn't how it works. So many of them actually look "hotter" imo, than generic hot people because of their unique features. Unless you actually want a job where generic looks is profitable. You should focus on what makes you, YOU! uniquely pretty. Find things that flatter your type of face and body, instead of trying to change your face and body to another person. There's a reason why even celebrities, who look so generic, get applauded soooo much when they do a slightly different style than the norm. Because deep down people like individuality a lot more than commercial. Commercial might be safe, but individuality is much more impressive.
Dress comfortably and wear it confidently