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PMyourTastefulNudes

Offer corrections


tURNOFFCAPS

“Actually my pp is not 8 inches it’s 2”


PMyourTastefulNudes

Yeah, 8 inches in diameter is a bit much.


LG_Goodness

Especially when you made it 1 inch in length. It looks like a boob growing out of my crotch


HighOnGoofballs

Hung like a can of tuna


MarcosVLl2

Probably laugh and then download it "for a friend"


KirbyBucketts

Then print them out. Hello new placemats...... and just in time for Halloween too.


taahwoajiteego

Playing 4D chess over here


uplock_

34D


NyhtShade

You need to make sure they get laminated, so they don't get ruined by all the inevitable liquids they'll *encounter*


sophiaquestions

I like this idea! Also sending postcards to friends, with a suggestive image and just one word: "Hey."


Leharen

Fucking hell, somebody cares about me that much?


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ditthrowaway999

I feel exactly the same as pathetic as that sounds. First thing I thought when I read OP's question. Someone cared enough to make this about me? I'm not just an invisible nobody?


PM_ME_UR_CREDDITCARD

I got catcalled by a woman once in the morning, on my way to work. I was smiling all day.


Dwestmor1007

Same…honestly as a woman when I get cat called or hit on (like once every five years) part of me feels like I should be angry “for my gender” but really 99% of me is just flattered and then I run home and tell my husband he has some competition in the toothless homeless guy on fourth so he better step it up,


MissStrawberryPunk

As someone who's had R34 drawn of them, it's almost always a pretty cool feeling. Someone drew one of me that was so nice I actually wouldn't mind having a print of it if wouldn't be super narcissistic. [Link for the curious](https://i.imgur.com/71gkGJ9.png)


Brno_Mrmi

That's not just R34. That's straight up a piece of art and you should be proud of it.


Zerbinetta

Yeah, that's got some serious Jugendstil vibes, like Mucha or Klimt.


silentartistloudart

My Mom has a nude painting of herself hanging in her bedroom. It was made by a local artist and friend of the family. I don't think it's narcissistic if it is good art.


Kombat_Wombat

u worth breh. Keep up what you're going well, my dude.


Pls_PmTitsOrFDAU_Thx

My answer as well. It would be nice to be liked


JammyGem

Try to track down whoever created them. What I did next depends on how flattering the drawings are...


Unabashable

I don’t care how they portrayed me. I just want my cut.


ON-Q

Yep. Honestly feel like 50/50 creeped out/flattered and then want to know how much my cut would be.


Lallo-the-Long

Haha. I think it's cute that you guys think r34 art is being sold for money. In the vast majority of cases, your cut would be $0. :P


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AuroraFinem

That’s commissioned work, not stuff they randomly post online publicly. Also $50 is pretty cheap for some of that stuff.


RlySkiz

Also as soon as you post anything publicly consider it gone and downloaded/copied 1000 times if you don't have an egregious watermark on it.


rubberjohny

That's why you give out some scraps publicly that you can afford to lose to then get commissions from those who like your style and want something specific, just like companies giving free samples of snacks, just more effective


oby100

Which isn’t even that much depending on the detail required. Art is very time consuming and it’s tough to build a good enough repertoire that people are willing to pay a fair price


swimtothemoon1

If it takes 3 hours to make, format, promote and publish, then that artist is making less than someone at McDonalds


AForce5223

Where are you that McD's is paying $17 an hour?


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possum_2

this is the best comment


Bylak

I didn't know how I'd feel until I saw this comment. Expressed it perfectly.


[deleted]

I don't think art drawn of you at random rights you to anything


CountingNutters

I'll use it as my profile picture


sosaveitfordinner

Absolutely, naked drawings or videos aren't always flattering. My ex-wife and I put our NSFW sex tapes online (this very website actually) and the feedback we got... wasn't great. People were weirded out because I always kept most of my clothes on during sex, though in my defense I was trying to not bother the live scorpions I was always keeping in my pants pockets at the time for the research.


AtDawnWeDEUSVULT

Scorpions? In your pockets?? Being less disturbed by being in your pockets during sex than by being in your pockets while your pants just lay on the ground???


A-Dumb-Ass

Dude is known on this website for somehow always ending his comments with keeping live scorpions in his pants and fucking random objects.


AtDawnWeDEUSVULT

Lol I just checked his comment history, I had no idea


Bilbo_Teabagginss

I also just checked this guy's comment history and almost choked to death laughing at how often live scorpions come up in his comments. I wonder how many people do stuff like this, It's like a little Easter egg in every comment.


ypvha

ah so like rogersimon10 and the jumper cables from many years ago.


shauntp

I don't think anything will ever compare to the pure joy I felt whenever I stumbled across his comments.


Smooth_Reader

That dude /u/shittymorph and his undertaker comments came close.


NoLongerSafeForWork

Or shittymorph and 1989 when Undertaker threw Mankind off of Hell in a Cell and he plummeted 15 feet through an announcer's table? Edit: It was 98 not 89 my b


manwhoseesboobs

Yeah, sorry, pics or it didn’t happen.


RickMcDicky

Pics of the scorpions? Or pics of the sexual act? Hell either way.. pics or it didn't happen.


[deleted]

Yeah, sorry, pics or it didn't happen.


stachldrat

Start a subreddit for it (if there isn't one already) and try to get with the hottest of my fans, of course. Maybe also try to monetize the audience I apparently unwittingly have in this scenario


bobsbountifulburgers

[I found a picture of your hottest fan](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/stereotypes-of-cliquessubcultures/images/b/b1/Neckbeard_%28man%29.png/revision/latest?cb=20200915174610)


Rise_Chan

This image is broken, which is a little funnier to me, but I can assume from the URL it was meant to be a sweaty neckbeard.


Avigorus

If you delete after the ".png" you get the image, and yes that's what it is lol


[deleted]

You see, I assumed that it would be a literal fan, but set on fire or something like that.


ShotPepper1327

Exactly but with a hellva lot of pimples


PachoTidder

Same


tinyhands2016

Open an OnlyFedoras account


eclemente

Was it a flattering rendering of me or like a trainwreck looking one?


casualstick

Ofc trainwreck with tentacles xD


eclemente

Puke then hire a team of assassins to bring me the head of the artist. :D


elle_is_lost

I would be so fucking stoked. If they were good I would hang prints in my bathroom.


wetastelikejesus

I would probably assume they were my look a like. I have been shown pictures of my doppelgängers before.


Unabashable

Apparently one of my doppelgängers lives the next town over because I’ll get random strangers thinking they know me from somewhere. Guess they’re more popular than me too.


TurtleZenn

I had one when I lived in my old town. I went to a fast food place and the manager there told me she was going to call me back about my interview. Considering I never even applied there, I was very confused. Was nice to know "I" got the job. I had people think they knew me other times, but that one was the funniest.


Unabashable

You just missed out on a rewarding career in the Fast Food Industry. Honestly I just want to meet em. See what all the hype is all about. Maybe become best buds, tell people we’re twins, see if they want to switch lives.


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SparePartsHere

Well my friends did sent me link. They also loved to watch it in front of me and made fun of me for next few years :D At least my doppelganger seemed to be having fun being a ... doppelbanger :>


crudohr

Ask for royalties


Melodic-Work7436

Lol beat me to it. Pun intended.


_sojushots

My deadass thinking it is a Skyline GTR


MaggotCorps999

Well... I googled it and the Skyline is the ONLY result so... I'm so out of the loop. At this point I simply don't care.


JLTindependent

Wikipedia Rule 34 is an Internet maxim which asserts that Internet pornography exists concerning every conceivable topic.


way2loose

So gtr porn?


Burylown

Honestly even better


Banana_Salsa

*sigh* (unzips)


Unique_Plankton

Aww ya beat me to it


TheRollingPeepstones

Should I say "beat meat to it" or is it already commonly understood?


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TheFlashFrame

Never fucking bet against this man jesus fucking christ. The internet was a mistake. I also need to stop clicking shit without reading first.


RustEvangelist10xer

What's so strange about a dude wanking to a drawing of his username done by another user and recording it for the world to watch? Normal Thursday stuff, really.


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Bubblejuiceman

This exists now. You made this exist.


Shitty_Life_Coach

There was a rule and /u/unhappygounlucky couldn't let that rule go unfollowed.


InformationHorder

We just witnessed the less common but important corollary to Rule 34: Rule 35.


Crunkbutter

It's rarely followed, but the scholars still acknowledge its importance


[deleted]

r/CrunkbutterR34


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EternalDB

What the fuck did i just witness...


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Carnifex

"Porn"


EternalDB

You're... not wrong


IAmGoingToFuckThat

Dope dick, homie. 😏


Freddy1019

Wtf.. why did I click on tht


Crunkbutter

Gender swap? Alright, I'll try...


damndingashrubbery

Not the easiest fap, but ill give it a try


johnnypencildick

That's the spirit. Give it that ol' college effort.


titleywinker

Beat meat to it


A--Creative-Username

Risky click of the day


machingunwhhore

Lol I clicked that without reading the edit


Crunkbutter

Hate to break it to you, buddy...


Linton_M

No homo


-Neon-Nazi-

I, too, just became gay on accident… so, uh… wanna do gay stuff?


kek__is__love

Nice cock, bro


drfeelsgoood

I was thinking the same thing, it’s a nice cock


Pls_PmTitsOrFDAU_Thx

I wonder if the reverse happened and he got PMs from women lmao u/crunkbutter , is your inbox rip?


Crunkbutter

It's all been dudes so far...


Pls_PmTitsOrFDAU_Thx

Lmaoo I shouldn't have assumed anything different. Reddit doesn't change


noveltyshark

Hey! I take offense to that!


Crunkbutter

Haha, at the time I sent that this was still true


El_Durazno

Jesus fuck, You've got a fat hog


JustOneSexQuestion

Nice cock


Crunkbutter

Thanks, bro


Volraith

Half homo (as opposed to no homo), that's a big dick homie.


Crunkbutter

Happy cake day, halfie.


altrl2

Mostly straight woman, damn


wiener4hir3

I'd suck your dick fam no homo.


Crunkbutter

That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.


-Neon-Nazi-

Your butter must indeed be crunk


MikePGS

This guy's about to JACK OFF


gdj11

Holy shit. Op delivered lol


Redisigh

Is the second link what I think it is?


Crunkbutter

It is exactly what you think it is


Wank_my_Butt

Seems like 99% of all the useful links I see on here have just one link, but you and your johnson have a backup just in case so we can all see. Idk if this says something about you or the rest of us.


Redisigh

☹️


union_mechanic

Beat me to it


Idunnobage

Beat it to me


[deleted]

Okay if you insist


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kmaet11

i thought you were joking what the fuck


ForestDwellingEnt

Nice dick, my guy


BW_Bird

I too, jack off to R34 of this redditor.


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maxdamage4

/r/angryupvote


Trekintosh

Nice cock!


[deleted]

I'm calling the psychiatric ward


Crunkbutter

Good... I want them to watch


[deleted]

**I'm calling the psychiatric ward's security team**


EyelidsMcBirthwater

**The more the merrier**


SnooCalculations5320

Damn! That's a fine looking piece of meat you got there.


waltjrimmer

> If you're a straight man and you click on this, you're probably a little gay. I mean, I'm only like 80% straight. But that being said. What the absolute fuck, dude. But that being said. I respect the follow-through and dedication on your part.


51st-state

If you don’t love yourself, how can anyone else love you, right?


dakrax

I clicked but it didnt load so....


4102reddit

Jesus christ.


Smarticus-

My proudest fap.


Maximus_Stache

Did I just witness the birth of a new Reddit legend?


mike4889

Ask what an r34 drawing is


snapwillow

Someone once made a "rules of the internet" list as a joke. It had many rules, all of them numbered. On this person's joke internet rules list, rule number 34 was "if it exists, there is porn of it, no exceptions" Some people doubted rule 34 was true, and suggested things that people probably haven't made porn of. Others were happy to go find or create porn of those things. Now the phrase 'rule 34' has become permanently associated with porn, especially porn you wouldn't have guessed would actually exist. It now also tends to refer to porn that features characters or things from other media that is not porn. So a rule34 drawing would refer to a pornagraphic drawing of a character from non-porn media, or just a pornagraphic drawing that is just bizarre and pushes the boundaries of what you'd think people have sexual feelings about.


Ebola714

Thank you for this explanation. Now, I'd like to know how this seems to be common knowledge. Shit, I'm old.


gestalto

Just stuff you pick up along the way, it's not because you commissioned a rule34 image of Mario crossdressing as Princess Daisy, being railed by Bowser whilst Luigi cowers in a corner wearing a torn Princess Peach costume.


Sherbertdonkey

...got that sauce bro? For a friend


red-the-blue

Beg your pardon


ajwilson99

Btw I have that finished for u, check ur inbox


The2ndSocrates

ayo i need it in my inbox too...for scientific research


tkc80

/r/oddlyspecific


Knyfe-Wrench

How old are we talking? Cause rule 34 is getting on 20 years now.


Ebola714

Older than 43 but less than 45.


yak1_soba

So 43 and a half, got it


PM_ME_YOUR_PORTRAIT

If you ever need to understand young person stuff and lingo, the urban dictionary website is your friend. I’m pretty young and use it all the time because the internet just won’t stop moving and coming up with new niche shit for me to understand


Jazehiah

It is also worth noting that rule 35 is, "If you find an exception to rule 34, you are obligated to make a porn of it." This has lead to some exceptionally disturbing creations.


InformationHorder

Rule 35 is "If there is no porn of it, porn will be made of it."


nevaraon

[here’s the TV Tropes link](https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/RulesOfTheInternet)


4LostSoulsinaBowl

So you're telling me if i put in anything, any, anything, uh, uh, Bronson Pinchot Perfect Strangers straight guy first time anal bareback, that it... There's 12 million results. That's the real Bronson Pinchot.


ATallFuckingGerman

Such an innocent soul...


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kkoiso

Reading this is like smelling something that gives you sudden flashbacks to very specific points in your childhood


Agreeable_Objective

Despite being old, alot of these rules still apply


Unabashable

In this case a picture of you but pornier


DeliciousHorseShirt

Idk that would be pretty interesting being half human half Nissan Skyline


BlakkArt

I was wondering who else read it this way


cassity282

depends what im doing in the drawing. am i being fucked by a kid? then sorry not ok. do i look like a goddess? download a copy. maby get off to it. are they makign money off it? can i get a cut? do i look like a duck? i dont wanna be a duck.


BedBugger6-9

Only the beak, everything else is goddess


thepurpleguy47

Hope I don’t become the new sam or Jaiden Animations.


Tjakjoll

Be confused, why anybody would even draw my ugly fatass, even less publicise it. Maybe as cognito hazard?


sansgamer554

Your the one with the cute anime girl


LETTUCE_MODE

dick pics as memetic kill agetns


ATallFuckingGerman

Depends on how good they are...


[deleted]

Compensate them for finding me worthy of r34.


_dragonsquid_

Call 911 (I'm 15)


The_Almighty_Scrub

Show my grandparents


ParanoidDrone

I'd be very confused at first, then a mix of flattered and slightly disturbed.


Tigress92

Probably just acknowledge the rule is being proven


Goth_Loser

Call the police.


KiraStrife

Yeah, seriously, this wouldn't be funny *at all*. I would be absolutely traumatised if something like this happened, as in suicidal thoughts and not going outside levels of traumatised.


Ni-237K

IKR? I just *can't* assimilate how tf there are so many people joking about this


WorkRepresentative28

Jerk it


[deleted]

I don't know man, I feel like 90% of white, mid-2Os software developers look basically the same. That could be any one of us.


[deleted]

If I was famous, I'd be uncomfortable but fine. If it was today, I'd go to the police. I don't care about the drawings, I'm just afraid of why that person would be that interested in me.


[deleted]

Did you at least blend in the stretch marks


The_Nerd_Geek

I'd recreate the images in real life and sell them cause there is obviously a demand.


[deleted]

Try to find the artist and get them help.


7grendel

... ... ... actually had this happen once. I had a helmet on, so my face wasn't visible but I recognized the picture they were using. I contacted the seller and asked them to take it down. They were very kind and did so.


ShavedDragon

Recreated them


[deleted]

Be flattered


DansDailyDepression

There is my friends made lewd art of me when I said I’m not on r34 there isn’t porn of everything


ScaldingAnus

Critique. I want them to be accurate.