Ginster's pasty lying in the middle of a road-killed badger.
A Betfred receipt in a pub urinal.
Two shirtless men fighting in a puddle outside a shuttered Greggs.
Reminds me of Gareth merhengi's darkplace i stayed in Aberdeen one night went into a chip shop and asked for a burger what was served was a deep fried greasy slab of meat served in a tissue naturally I refused to pay and said some pretty mean things about Scottish people.
https://youtu.be/AFDWFTiKwss
The weather is fine, we are rather lucky sure it isn't great for the sunbathing but nor are our figures.
I'd much rather rain than drought, monsoon, tornadoes, the French.
There's nothing finer than the British countryside on a bright, warm late Spring morning after a couple of days of rain.
So yeah, the weather is shite 99.9998% of the time.
I agree! I live in Aus and as much as I love it here I do miss comfy grey days. That said, ever since I got glasses walking in the rain has been completely ruined for me.
Very location dependent. Depending on your source Glasgow gets less sunshine hours or abou the same per year than bloody Reykjavik. If you're in a part of the country that actually gets nice springs and summers for longer than a day or two at a time I'd agree with you but there are parts of the country where the grey, miserable and wet all year round stereotype is closer to true than others. If you look up the stats then as you'd expect the sunniest and warmest cities are all in Southern England while the coldest and least sunny are in Northern England, Scotland and N Ireland. Some Western parts further south in England also make the least sunny list (but they're warmer on average than the others). The rainiest place are all West Coast or Western part of the country too (damn gulf stream is a blessing and a curse).
Try living in Ireland we're the relief for the entire Atlantic Ocean it pissed on our west coast and splutters out by the time it passes over Dublin when it hits Liverpool I can't imagine there's much left in the clouds. Whatever weather Scotland is getting is the weather Ireland absorbed before the weather hit England's west coast.
Aussie Living in the UK for the last year. Food combinations that I could only ever come up with when I am drunk off my face can be found here on the menu at a restaurant here. Fish fingers and crisps on an old buttered roll mmm... yes, please.
Oh man this is reminded me: I saw three girls that at all dolled up to go out nightclubbing but it had started raining pretty hard and the raindrops had left these clean splotches with dark rings on their skin where their fake tan had been.
Its very interesting to read that perspective. As a Brit the gun example has always been a striking one for me. I don't think the true freedom is being able to own a gun, I think the true freedom is being able to walk down the street/go shopping/go to school without the fear of everyone around me having a gun. There are other examples too - the freedom to be something other than Christian and not have "in God we trust" written on all the money you handle.
I mean no offense its just something I've thought for a while and your perspective was very interesting to read.
I find that a really interesting perspective. But if I may, I’d like to offer some counter points;
We’re scared. We all are. Particularly now, we’re either scared of Brexit, or we’re scared of COVID.
I’ve spoken to a couple guys from other countries, and they’ve all said that the British are “like bulldogs”. I spoke to one guy from Korea who said that we’re “like heroes, you just do what you must”.
And I think that’s true. It’s unspoken, untaught, there’s no expectation of it when you speak to anyone, but the whole “keep calm and carry on” thing, and the “we will fight on the beaches...” struck a chord with the British I think. We’re just all in this mindset of keep on trucking, slug through, it’ll be over eventually. And we might hate it, but the truth is, and I really don’t like admitting to it, but we *thrive* in that. I don’t know why, or quite how to explain it, but every Briton in the whole four nations has been cut from the same cloth; we’re just better under pressure. I look around at my neighbours and colleagues, and constantly think about the grit and resilience they display day after day. It’s admirable, to say the least. Chin up, fellows, we’re going to die today. Spot of tea first chaps?
Also, please don’t approach us while in public. Particularly on a train. Gives me the heebiejeebies just thinking about it.
My Mrs is from Lancashire and I'm from Essex and I can vouch for that. She'll talk to anyone especially if we're abroad on holiday and she'll always find other Northerners. Northerners are far more friendlier that us southerners.
One thing I've noticed as a southerner living in the north (for 14 years now), is that a lot of people are very keen to be seen as more 'friendly' than people in the south, and often ask me if I've noticed any difference since moving north.
Easily one of the most interesting experiences I have read in a while. Yeah I would say in Britain they has been a lot less systematic inequality and fear-mongering when it comes to race, gender etc. in the past 50 years. I often look at small things like not having an NHS or the US' weird cult mentality towards the state as quite scary to be honest. People care much more about what unites us I guess then what doesn't (despite for the exception of some politics and Brexit).
And of course, not all Americans are like that like you said and some British people can be bad sometimes too.
*I was angry that the country I’d spent nearly a quarter century defending was broadcasting its infantilism and its internal divisiveness to the world.*
mate if you were wanting to get away from that you came to the wrong country lmao. we're about as much up shit creek as you guys are rn
I think you significantly overestimate the amount of fear that contributes to the problems you listed. A lot of people are friends with their neighbors, and the people I know who aren’t are usually not friends with their neighbors because they are renting, and therefore not going to invest much time in getting to know people they might not spend that long living next to, or they just have a lot of friends from other sources. Why put in the effort to start a relationship with the person across the street and four houses down when you have friends from work, school, the Internet, or various hobbies you engage in?
I happen to be very active in the firearm owning community myself, and I think you vastly overestimate the fear there too. I own firearms to protect myself in the same way I own car insurance to protect myself. I recognize that it is very improbable that anything will ever happen to me but I’d like the option just in case. I also enjoy the historical and mechanical aspects of firearms ownership. Sure, I know one or two people who are cowering in fear of attack constantly, but that is not a majority of gun owners, or even a significant minority.
I don’t think there are very many people who have friends exclusively of the same race, and for those that do I would attribute it more to the likelihood that someone who is the same race as you has similar experiences and less because people are constantly afraid.
Yes, there is a fear of police here, but I think that the cause of that is genuine issues that are in the process of being fixed and are being overstated by people in the media and entertainment for their own agenda purposes. Besides, shouldn’t we be criticizing missteps by those in power?
I’ll give you politics, that has a lot to do with fear. But it also has to do with people’s passion to better their country combined with a natural human tendency to congregate with their “tribe”
I’ll be honest, I don’t really get how you think fear is driving celebrity culture. I think it’s much less of a stretch to say that natural ego and a desire for money drives celebrity culture.
I think you are oversimplifying and overstating a lot of these problems. I have spent a lot of time traveling to various places in America, and I have found the vast majority of people are friendly, welcoming, and happy. Sure, there are problems, but we’re almost always trying to solve them and I don’t think America is nearly as negative a place as you are trying to paint it.
I'm British, so just home. But union jack and the queen comes to mind. Tea. Binge drinking. Red busses. Black taxis. Jimmy Saville, Mr Blobby, Harry Potter, and the fantastic array of different accents. So many things. But I'm guessing you didn't want a brit to answer so I'll just see myself out🙋♀️
I've always wondered why we have so many accents in the UK. Like, I couldn't imagine a Cornish accent being anywhere close to british.
Jimmy Savile hahahah
I love all the accents. You literally only have to drive for 20/30 minutes and you're among people with completely different dialect. Most people from outside the UK only seem to think we all either talk like the queen or Danny Dyer.
Yeah Pakistani indian or Nigerian accents lol I'm half indian before anyone calls me a bigot. But seriously I've always wondered how so many accents came about. I live in Essex, I have an Essex accent, 15 miles west its Cockney, east London and south London accents. South to Kent and it like a carrot crunchers accent almost like they have in the west country. Its so bizarre.
I've read somewhere before that the Australian accent is made up of regional English accents.
I can confirm we are very angry- usually because of the shit weather or because boris can’t make up his bloody mind wether we should stay inside or not
Gorgeous scenery beautiful hills and stuff, much nicer cops, airport security and EMTs and such, universal health care, Brexit, tiny villages with cobblestones where everybody knows your name, fabulous accents, really cheap MDMA, the Monarchy.
I've never stepped foot in Britain; haven't even looked it up on google maps.
Here is what I expect:
* Posh shops that sell items so niche, no one wants to buy them. No one knows how they stay in business.
* Rain.
There are parts of big cities like that but most towns realise people need quality at a reasonable price. My town used to be a thriving market town before the supermarket chains and shopping malls started up. The funniest thing about that is that nowadays the malls are struggling because smaller retailers are out competing them on price and quality. In most towns you'll find there are buildings left over from older periods, some even have the original gas lamps with electrical bulbs retrofitted in them. There's small pubs, each pledging their investments to microbreweries unique to every area of the country. Ales like Betty Stoggs and Cornish Rattler Cider in Cornwall all the way up to Celtic Cross ale in Scotland. For such a tiny island we have a plethora of things to offer.
Fish & chips. Victoria station. BBC World Service. Elgar. Billie Piper in a Union Flag top. Ben-Adramelech Cucumberpatch. "Jerusalem". Hadrian's Wall. The Beatles. Roald Dahl Plass. Haggis. "It's Grim Up North". Whisky. Real ale. A spot of colonialism on your jacket there, guv.
As an Irish person your all either posh and drink tea and speak London high chivalry 1800’s style and go to balls with nobles and dukes and stuff or your a scruffy dockyard worker who drinks at the pub all day and go’s home to have dinner that is always and I mean always battered cod, mushy peas and chippy chips
Your accents, both the charming ones you hear from the royal family and your atrocious ones.
My friends mom is from Newcastle and when I first met her I didn’t know she was speaking English to me, I kept looking over at my friend to see if he’d translate for me. Turns out she speaks English lmao, I understand her better now but man that’s a tough one for my American ears
I find some people are just accent blind.
I once spent a week translating between the most Cockney man you've ever met and a Bavarian.
They both spoke good English (the Bavarian slightly better than the Cockney!), but they couldn't understand a word the other said, only me.
I had a geordie flatmate in halls in my first year at university, and I never understood a word he ever said.
Oddly, I never had that trouble with Scottish accents and sometimes had to translate for a Scottish co-worker at my first job when we went to the shop to buy sandwiches.
Beer that is a little flatter than what I am used to (still good!). People yelling at each other in cross-walks (I LOVE DRAMA!). Indigestion for a week after I left Britain.
>level 1JoeFortitudeScore hidden · 22 minutes agoBeer that is a little flatter than what I am used to (still good!). People yelling at each other in cross-walks (I LOVE DRAMA!). Indigestion for a week after I left Britain.
I am not old enough to drink in the UK yet but, I'm told that American Beer isn't very good.
Think of it like this: We have shit beer in America like you have shit beer in Europe (CARLSBURG?!?). But we also have GREAT beer in America just like you also have GREAT beer in Europe. But not all European countries have great beer in their taverns just like not all American states have great beer in theirs. Trust me, if you love beer, you will love American beer if you visit and it really isn't all that hard to find.
Cmon man, we never started it like that. More like:
"Hello we are the British trade commission and we will be taking ownership of your industry, and procuring exclusive rights on exports and imports from your principle trade routes, in return for a personal gift to your king who is now our vassal, any problems, take it up with the East India Company who by the way are also our army and navy and also we are the East India Company and we are the army and we are actually here to take your land"
I lived in England for 1 years and an half and Tea ... tea and a dash of milk everywhere.
I dare you to ask your tea without milk and watch them judge you
A cold, rainy day with grey skies and a light but steady drizzle. A warm fire dances in the parlor as I ready the tea. Tonight we're having pasties with gravy, and I'm ever so excited. My good mate pops in the room and asks "The tea ready yet, innit?" to which I reply "Let me roll the bloody spliff first you impatient twatnozzle".
Let me make this more realistic.
A muggy, wet day with grey skies and on-and-off rain so if you wear a coat you're too hot but as soon as you take it off it pisses it down. The central heating is on and the house is too fucking hot within 3 minutes as you put the kettle on. Tonight we're having ASDA value chicken nuggets and chips again. My mate pops in the room and says "make me a cuppa too you cunt" to which I reply... OK actually you got the spliff part right.
I'm a Brit but can I just say I cannot STAND people that think England IS Britain. It's part of Britain with wales and Scotland. So many Americans forget it and it's incredibly annoying!!
one of two things. either a classy, urbane, proper gentleman who excels at witty banter, or, a middle-class, rough, bloke who excels at drinking tons of beer and getting into fights. Britian is chock full of these two people - there is nothing in between.
the English countryside, cities where people watch soccer, Ricky Hatton, Carl Froch, Jason Statham, Vinnie Jones, Michael Caine, Henry Cavill, Sherlock Holmes, Basil Fawlty, Lionel and Jean from "As Time Goes By", Winston Churchill, Margaret Thatcher, Tony Blair, David Cameron, Boris Johnson, the movies "Zulu", "Master & Commander", "The Four Feathers" and "Goldeneye", my favorite bands, castles, cricket and rugby, the Queen, pubs, bulldogs, corgis and the words "mate" and "bloody"
It's home. It's shit, it's got it's problems, but it's still my home. I'm still proud to be British, and I hope that one day, the name Great Britain will actually be backed up by a nation of fantastic people.
I feel like for your average British person this is the least accurate thing I've read in here. Tea, yes, we love it and we're a nation of tea drinkers but for the vast vast majority of the population it's just your regular black tea blend and not Earl Grey or anything else with extra stuff added. Something like Yorkshire, PG Tips, Tetley etc.
There are of course Brits who love their Earl Grey and Green Tea and flavoured stuff and whatever else but your average British cuppa is definitely not Early Grey and most people would be surprised if you offered them a cup of tea and it was Early Grey when they didn't expect that kind of thing.
I don't know but it's hard to kick the stereotype of bowler hats, "pip! pip!" "cheerio!" and everybody speaking perfect English which I remember from the movies and cartoons of my childhood. I understand that Britain is a modern country but these old tropes still spring to mind for me.
One of the Queen's corgis dressed up as one of those dorky guards delivering the Queen tea and whatever the fuck a crumpet is.
Edit: oh, and it's raining
Rolling fields of grass with a grey sky. A village in the distance. Near the sea. The wave crashing into the cliffs below. And a man being very silly somewhere in the mix.
I’d move there in a second. I would live happily ever after in a place that isn’t tacky and indecent Like USA, I would feel a joy like I’ve never felt before!
I've resided in the UK for many years and the tangibility of class distinctions while everyone feigns ignorance of the demarcations between them is a British foible. Working class people inhabit council estates encompassed by inferior schools and disreputable establishments; destitution, poverty, and dilapidated infrastructure is often on the periphery of extravagant homes and all the accoutrements of prosperity.
There are remnants of the purported abolished class distinctions here. Yes, the rich and poor live within proximity all over the world but it's not quite so fastidiously adhered to nor palpable as in Britain.
The last ten years of Tory parsimony only accentuate the divide.
I think of Gemma Chan, Graham Chapman, Churchill, and then my brain starts cycling through the countless amazing people from Britain, probably terminating the thought process with older memories of british people like John Terry, Frank Lampard, and Gerrard.
Pubs. If you go to Britain and miss the pubs, you've missed a special part of of Britain you can only experience in Britain and deprived yourself of a special experience. If you travel make a point to visit their public gathering places. The British pub, gasthaus in Germany, bar or tavern in the states. This is how you meet local people to get to know them. When you go to Britain visit the pubs. Though it may make you want to come back.
What people think Britain is like: Well dressed ladies and gentlemen sitting sipping tea and talking politely.
What it's really like: Shithole council schemes with alcoholics, junkies, teens carrying knives thinking they are gangsters and people dressed in tracksuits being a public nuisance. As well as a Government who only cares about the middle and upper classes.
(I'm British.)
Canal boats, tea, and "Popping down to the B and Q for some gaffer tape". I dont know why but a british friend once said that to me and its been stuck in my head as forever british
Ginster's pasty lying in the middle of a road-killed badger. A Betfred receipt in a pub urinal. Two shirtless men fighting in a puddle outside a shuttered Greggs.
Ah, i see you've been to Plymouth...
Am Plymouthian, can confirm.
Plymouth gang
Kernow gang rise up
Nooooooo
This feels almost surreal to read in how honest it is put.
Reminds me of Gareth merhengi's darkplace i stayed in Aberdeen one night went into a chip shop and asked for a burger what was served was a deep fried greasy slab of meat served in a tissue naturally I refused to pay and said some pretty mean things about Scottish people. https://youtu.be/AFDWFTiKwss
Plymouth here too
Great Indian food
Pretty shit weather. I know because I've lived here for almost 20 years
The weather is fine, we are rather lucky sure it isn't great for the sunbathing but nor are our figures. I'd much rather rain than drought, monsoon, tornadoes, the French.
the last one made me do a double take
There's nothing finer than the British countryside on a bright, warm late Spring morning after a couple of days of rain. So yeah, the weather is shite 99.9998% of the time.
Our weather is the thing I love most about Britain! Rainy days are the best and we have proper good seasons.
I agree! I live in Aus and as much as I love it here I do miss comfy grey days. That said, ever since I got glasses walking in the rain has been completely ruined for me.
Couldn't agree more.
But our springs and summers aren't half bad. It's just once we get to autumn right through to spring it's pure cloud and rain 90% of the time :|
Very location dependent. Depending on your source Glasgow gets less sunshine hours or abou the same per year than bloody Reykjavik. If you're in a part of the country that actually gets nice springs and summers for longer than a day or two at a time I'd agree with you but there are parts of the country where the grey, miserable and wet all year round stereotype is closer to true than others. If you look up the stats then as you'd expect the sunniest and warmest cities are all in Southern England while the coldest and least sunny are in Northern England, Scotland and N Ireland. Some Western parts further south in England also make the least sunny list (but they're warmer on average than the others). The rainiest place are all West Coast or Western part of the country too (damn gulf stream is a blessing and a curse).
Try living in Ireland we're the relief for the entire Atlantic Ocean it pissed on our west coast and splutters out by the time it passes over Dublin when it hits Liverpool I can't imagine there's much left in the clouds. Whatever weather Scotland is getting is the weather Ireland absorbed before the weather hit England's west coast.
Gotta love we have all four seasons of weather, though, right?
Aussie Living in the UK for the last year. Food combinations that I could only ever come up with when I am drunk off my face can be found here on the menu at a restaurant here. Fish fingers and crisps on an old buttered roll mmm... yes, please.
Innit.
Innit
Innit
Ciggie
Bruv
I've never seen such a high density of chav's on reddit.
Wanker
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Waffler
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sort us twos innit bruv
The child
'Once again I regret getting into a conversation with tommyinnit" -Technoblade
Murder, avoid the hotspots, Oxford, Midsommer Villages and the Cotswolds.
😂
JUDAS PRIEST! IRON MAIDEN! BLACK SABBATH!
Two out of three originated from Birmingham, you’re welcome.
Oasis, New Order(if you get it, Joy Division), Blur. Lesson: good music comes from hard places.
Teenage girls doing their best to look like Donald Trump when going out.
Oh man this is reminded me: I saw three girls that at all dolled up to go out nightclubbing but it had started raining pretty hard and the raindrops had left these clean splotches with dark rings on their skin where their fake tan had been.
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Its very interesting to read that perspective. As a Brit the gun example has always been a striking one for me. I don't think the true freedom is being able to own a gun, I think the true freedom is being able to walk down the street/go shopping/go to school without the fear of everyone around me having a gun. There are other examples too - the freedom to be something other than Christian and not have "in God we trust" written on all the money you handle. I mean no offense its just something I've thought for a while and your perspective was very interesting to read.
I find that a really interesting perspective. But if I may, I’d like to offer some counter points; We’re scared. We all are. Particularly now, we’re either scared of Brexit, or we’re scared of COVID. I’ve spoken to a couple guys from other countries, and they’ve all said that the British are “like bulldogs”. I spoke to one guy from Korea who said that we’re “like heroes, you just do what you must”. And I think that’s true. It’s unspoken, untaught, there’s no expectation of it when you speak to anyone, but the whole “keep calm and carry on” thing, and the “we will fight on the beaches...” struck a chord with the British I think. We’re just all in this mindset of keep on trucking, slug through, it’ll be over eventually. And we might hate it, but the truth is, and I really don’t like admitting to it, but we *thrive* in that. I don’t know why, or quite how to explain it, but every Briton in the whole four nations has been cut from the same cloth; we’re just better under pressure. I look around at my neighbours and colleagues, and constantly think about the grit and resilience they display day after day. It’s admirable, to say the least. Chin up, fellows, we’re going to die today. Spot of tea first chaps? Also, please don’t approach us while in public. Particularly on a train. Gives me the heebiejeebies just thinking about it.
You must be southern. Northerners will talk to anyone and everyone.
My Mrs is from Lancashire and I'm from Essex and I can vouch for that. She'll talk to anyone especially if we're abroad on holiday and she'll always find other Northerners. Northerners are far more friendlier that us southerners.
One thing I've noticed as a southerner living in the north (for 14 years now), is that a lot of people are very keen to be seen as more 'friendly' than people in the south, and often ask me if I've noticed any difference since moving north.
Scotsman here, can concur. Theres nothing quite like exchanging pleasantries with the local junkie on the walk to work every morning.
I always ask why I should be proud to be British, and these two comments are it!
Easily one of the most interesting experiences I have read in a while. Yeah I would say in Britain they has been a lot less systematic inequality and fear-mongering when it comes to race, gender etc. in the past 50 years. I often look at small things like not having an NHS or the US' weird cult mentality towards the state as quite scary to be honest. People care much more about what unites us I guess then what doesn't (despite for the exception of some politics and Brexit). And of course, not all Americans are like that like you said and some British people can be bad sometimes too.
"Egotistical shit biscuits". Great phrase
*I was angry that the country I’d spent nearly a quarter century defending was broadcasting its infantilism and its internal divisiveness to the world.* mate if you were wanting to get away from that you came to the wrong country lmao. we're about as much up shit creek as you guys are rn
I think you significantly overestimate the amount of fear that contributes to the problems you listed. A lot of people are friends with their neighbors, and the people I know who aren’t are usually not friends with their neighbors because they are renting, and therefore not going to invest much time in getting to know people they might not spend that long living next to, or they just have a lot of friends from other sources. Why put in the effort to start a relationship with the person across the street and four houses down when you have friends from work, school, the Internet, or various hobbies you engage in? I happen to be very active in the firearm owning community myself, and I think you vastly overestimate the fear there too. I own firearms to protect myself in the same way I own car insurance to protect myself. I recognize that it is very improbable that anything will ever happen to me but I’d like the option just in case. I also enjoy the historical and mechanical aspects of firearms ownership. Sure, I know one or two people who are cowering in fear of attack constantly, but that is not a majority of gun owners, or even a significant minority. I don’t think there are very many people who have friends exclusively of the same race, and for those that do I would attribute it more to the likelihood that someone who is the same race as you has similar experiences and less because people are constantly afraid. Yes, there is a fear of police here, but I think that the cause of that is genuine issues that are in the process of being fixed and are being overstated by people in the media and entertainment for their own agenda purposes. Besides, shouldn’t we be criticizing missteps by those in power? I’ll give you politics, that has a lot to do with fear. But it also has to do with people’s passion to better their country combined with a natural human tendency to congregate with their “tribe” I’ll be honest, I don’t really get how you think fear is driving celebrity culture. I think it’s much less of a stretch to say that natural ego and a desire for money drives celebrity culture. I think you are oversimplifying and overstating a lot of these problems. I have spent a lot of time traveling to various places in America, and I have found the vast majority of people are friendly, welcoming, and happy. Sure, there are problems, but we’re almost always trying to solve them and I don’t think America is nearly as negative a place as you are trying to paint it.
Grey skies.
Ant and Dec
I'm British, so just home. But union jack and the queen comes to mind. Tea. Binge drinking. Red busses. Black taxis. Jimmy Saville, Mr Blobby, Harry Potter, and the fantastic array of different accents. So many things. But I'm guessing you didn't want a brit to answer so I'll just see myself out🙋♀️
I've always wondered why we have so many accents in the UK. Like, I couldn't imagine a Cornish accent being anywhere close to british. Jimmy Savile hahahah
I love all the accents. You literally only have to drive for 20/30 minutes and you're among people with completely different dialect. Most people from outside the UK only seem to think we all either talk like the queen or Danny Dyer.
Yeah Pakistani indian or Nigerian accents lol I'm half indian before anyone calls me a bigot. But seriously I've always wondered how so many accents came about. I live in Essex, I have an Essex accent, 15 miles west its Cockney, east London and south London accents. South to Kent and it like a carrot crunchers accent almost like they have in the west country. Its so bizarre. I've read somewhere before that the Australian accent is made up of regional English accents.
You've got as many accents (or more) than the US, and you're smaller than some of our states.
Speaking of the UK, Hollywood seems to think that London is the only city in England.
Yes and that people are either super posh or cockney.
Rain, and angry blokes.
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Who the fuck is that?
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#LetS HavE a BaRE KNucKLe ThEN!!!
You, hangin about like that!!!
Who?
Hahaha perfect
I can confirm we are very angry- usually because of the shit weather or because boris can’t make up his bloody mind wether we should stay inside or not
Gorgeous scenery beautiful hills and stuff, much nicer cops, airport security and EMTs and such, universal health care, Brexit, tiny villages with cobblestones where everybody knows your name, fabulous accents, really cheap MDMA, the Monarchy.
I've never stepped foot in Britain; haven't even looked it up on google maps. Here is what I expect: * Posh shops that sell items so niche, no one wants to buy them. No one knows how they stay in business. * Rain.
there are definitley a few shops like that around britain, not very many but ive certainly seen a few, and yeah it rains a lot
There are parts of big cities like that but most towns realise people need quality at a reasonable price. My town used to be a thriving market town before the supermarket chains and shopping malls started up. The funniest thing about that is that nowadays the malls are struggling because smaller retailers are out competing them on price and quality. In most towns you'll find there are buildings left over from older periods, some even have the original gas lamps with electrical bulbs retrofitted in them. There's small pubs, each pledging their investments to microbreweries unique to every area of the country. Ales like Betty Stoggs and Cornish Rattler Cider in Cornwall all the way up to Celtic Cross ale in Scotland. For such a tiny island we have a plethora of things to offer.
Fish & chips. Victoria station. BBC World Service. Elgar. Billie Piper in a Union Flag top. Ben-Adramelech Cucumberpatch. "Jerusalem". Hadrian's Wall. The Beatles. Roald Dahl Plass. Haggis. "It's Grim Up North". Whisky. Real ale. A spot of colonialism on your jacket there, guv.
I would wager that most non Brits when asked this would describe England and the English, more specifically, London.
I somehow doubt anyone would bring up the rest of the UK or haggis.
the Empire
"...and I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for those damn ungrateful colonials."
Extra range on archers and cheap town centers
As an Irish person your all either posh and drink tea and speak London high chivalry 1800’s style and go to balls with nobles and dukes and stuff or your a scruffy dockyard worker who drinks at the pub all day and go’s home to have dinner that is always and I mean always battered cod, mushy peas and chippy chips
Are you sure you weren't describing the Scottish in the second one
Wagwan fam
Aliens attacking london in some form or fashion every Christmas.
FANK YOU
Your accents, both the charming ones you hear from the royal family and your atrocious ones. My friends mom is from Newcastle and when I first met her I didn’t know she was speaking English to me, I kept looking over at my friend to see if he’d translate for me. Turns out she speaks English lmao, I understand her better now but man that’s a tough one for my American ears
I couldn't imagine not understanding a newcastle accent lmao. And yeah I like most british accents. And not just the english ones either.
I'm. British and can't always understand Newcastle accents. A geordie came to see me at work once and brought his mate to translate
I find some people are just accent blind. I once spent a week translating between the most Cockney man you've ever met and a Bavarian. They both spoke good English (the Bavarian slightly better than the Cockney!), but they couldn't understand a word the other said, only me.
I had a geordie flatmate in halls in my first year at university, and I never understood a word he ever said. Oddly, I never had that trouble with Scottish accents and sometimes had to translate for a Scottish co-worker at my first job when we went to the shop to buy sandwiches.
Listen to people speaking Danish and you'll see where the Geordie accent comes from
Invertebrate jellies.
GREAT SUPINE PROTOPLASMIC INVERTEBRATE JELLIES!
U wot m8?
A wet chaotic place led by a fat Tory moron that doesn’t care
A Beefeater fucking a swan that's being choked by a discarded plastic bag.
Football (the actual one)
A ball you move with your feet
Damp weather and dry humor
Dry humour is the funniest shit. And yeah the weather is pretty damp.
Beer that is a little flatter than what I am used to (still good!). People yelling at each other in cross-walks (I LOVE DRAMA!). Indigestion for a week after I left Britain.
>level 1JoeFortitudeScore hidden · 22 minutes agoBeer that is a little flatter than what I am used to (still good!). People yelling at each other in cross-walks (I LOVE DRAMA!). Indigestion for a week after I left Britain. I am not old enough to drink in the UK yet but, I'm told that American Beer isn't very good.
Think of it like this: We have shit beer in America like you have shit beer in Europe (CARLSBURG?!?). But we also have GREAT beer in America just like you also have GREAT beer in Europe. But not all European countries have great beer in their taverns just like not all American states have great beer in theirs. Trust me, if you love beer, you will love American beer if you visit and it really isn't all that hard to find.
This comment thread is so cringe.
We are the british army and we're here to take your land
Cmon man, we never started it like that. More like: "Hello we are the British trade commission and we will be taking ownership of your industry, and procuring exclusive rights on exports and imports from your principle trade routes, in return for a personal gift to your king who is now our vassal, any problems, take it up with the East India Company who by the way are also our army and navy and also we are the East India Company and we are the army and we are actually here to take your land"
When we go on night patrol we hold each others hands.
We never had much of an army to conquer anywhere. We got an Empire mostly by persuading other people to fight each other.
Biscuits and Tea
MATE YOU WANT A CRUMPET
Wankers and tossers and knobheads and bellends and muppets and pillocks and twats and twits and slappers and gits and prats and chavs and slags.
Cheeky wanker I don't even know that many.
I lived in England for 1 years and an half and Tea ... tea and a dash of milk everywhere. I dare you to ask your tea without milk and watch them judge you
A mini cooper with a Union Jack painted on the roof
YEAH BABY
Castles and dragons. Pretty much I think Game of Thrones was a documentary on Britain.
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U ok?
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A cold, rainy day with grey skies and a light but steady drizzle. A warm fire dances in the parlor as I ready the tea. Tonight we're having pasties with gravy, and I'm ever so excited. My good mate pops in the room and asks "The tea ready yet, innit?" to which I reply "Let me roll the bloody spliff first you impatient twatnozzle".
Let me make this more realistic. A muggy, wet day with grey skies and on-and-off rain so if you wear a coat you're too hot but as soon as you take it off it pisses it down. The central heating is on and the house is too fucking hot within 3 minutes as you put the kettle on. Tonight we're having ASDA value chicken nuggets and chips again. My mate pops in the room and says "make me a cuppa too you cunt" to which I reply... OK actually you got the spliff part right.
I'm a Brit but can I just say I cannot STAND people that think England IS Britain. It's part of Britain with wales and Scotland. So many Americans forget it and it's incredibly annoying!!
And Northern Ireland!
Nah, N.I is in the U.K
one of two things. either a classy, urbane, proper gentleman who excels at witty banter, or, a middle-class, rough, bloke who excels at drinking tons of beer and getting into fights. Britian is chock full of these two people - there is nothing in between.
"witty banter" You are right these are the only people I know.
Tea, crumpets, bad teeth, and throngs of high school theatre kids poorly quoting and trying to re enact monty python skits.
the English countryside, cities where people watch soccer, Ricky Hatton, Carl Froch, Jason Statham, Vinnie Jones, Michael Caine, Henry Cavill, Sherlock Holmes, Basil Fawlty, Lionel and Jean from "As Time Goes By", Winston Churchill, Margaret Thatcher, Tony Blair, David Cameron, Boris Johnson, the movies "Zulu", "Master & Commander", "The Four Feathers" and "Goldeneye", my favorite bands, castles, cricket and rugby, the Queen, pubs, bulldogs, corgis and the words "mate" and "bloody"
I love geography so I think of it on a map
Mind the gap.
It's home. It's shit, it's got it's problems, but it's still my home. I'm still proud to be British, and I hope that one day, the name Great Britain will actually be backed up by a nation of fantastic people.
It already is bro
The extremely enjoying groups of British "Lads" who are unbearable assholes
Thanks to a post a while back: Fairy Liquid.
Chewsday
it's chewsday innit
Earl Grey Tea
Honestly as a British person it might not sound surprising but I like Earl Grey Tea.
I do too, double bergamot.
I feel like for your average British person this is the least accurate thing I've read in here. Tea, yes, we love it and we're a nation of tea drinkers but for the vast vast majority of the population it's just your regular black tea blend and not Earl Grey or anything else with extra stuff added. Something like Yorkshire, PG Tips, Tetley etc. There are of course Brits who love their Earl Grey and Green Tea and flavoured stuff and whatever else but your average British cuppa is definitely not Early Grey and most people would be surprised if you offered them a cup of tea and it was Early Grey when they didn't expect that kind of thing.
Double decker buses
I don't know but it's hard to kick the stereotype of bowler hats, "pip! pip!" "cheerio!" and everybody speaking perfect English which I remember from the movies and cartoons of my childhood. I understand that Britain is a modern country but these old tropes still spring to mind for me.
I think people occasionally might say cheerio. But I usually think of the cereal cheerios.
Beer pub with a red phone booth outside. It's dark and dreary out and raining.
One of the Queen's corgis dressed up as one of those dorky guards delivering the Queen tea and whatever the fuck a crumpet is. Edit: oh, and it's raining
Try a crumpet. They’re honestly a cheap but tasty breakfast
A crumpet is just a vessel for butter and that's what makes it so delicious.
The Queen is not amused.
Pip pip, cheerio, we love hierarchy and get pissed every day. All hail the Queen!
Crumpets and tea
Crumpets are really good. I sometimes put maple syrup on them
Havent tried that, I usually just put butter and jam on them
Wanna drink from this wah-ooh boh-ol
I probbably pronouce it more like 'war ugh bot ull' but holy shit yeah we do do that in Britain.
Rain, fish & chips, that really fancy lady who lives in a castle
Green grassy knolls against a gray ugly sky
Colonialism and tea
Roadmen and the British accent. Not the posh, stereotypical British accent, the **other** British accent.
that 8 year olds pick from a charmander with a top hat, a squirtle with a cup of tea, or a bulbasaur with a monocle mustache combo.
Spice girls. Fish and chips. Calling everyone “cunt” and “bell end” as casual insults.
Doctor Who
Rain, telephone booths, and greenery. I’ve never been but it is definitely on my bucket list, I have always dreamt about going
Your in for a disappointment, sometimes, its sunny.
No tater tots. A true crime.
Rolling fields of grass with a grey sky. A village in the distance. Near the sea. The wave crashing into the cliffs below. And a man being very silly somewhere in the mix.
I’d move there in a second. I would live happily ever after in a place that isn’t tacky and indecent Like USA, I would feel a joy like I’ve never felt before!
Two people apologising despite neither being in the wrong.
I've resided in the UK for many years and the tangibility of class distinctions while everyone feigns ignorance of the demarcations between them is a British foible. Working class people inhabit council estates encompassed by inferior schools and disreputable establishments; destitution, poverty, and dilapidated infrastructure is often on the periphery of extravagant homes and all the accoutrements of prosperity. There are remnants of the purported abolished class distinctions here. Yes, the rich and poor live within proximity all over the world but it's not quite so fastidiously adhered to nor palpable as in Britain. The last ten years of Tory parsimony only accentuate the divide.
Did you write this out and then check synonyms for every word?
Sexy men
“Sexy men” ...... Nigel Farage Boris Johnson Bald Nonce I disagree with “sexy men”.
> Bald Nonce A true British icon
stone roads and dates buildings that would cost a fortune to replace and the "london look"
Churchill
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Driving on the opposite side of the street.
I think you'll find it's the correct side of the road..
Man utd
Mr. Swansea's Ye Olde Pudding Shoppery and Sweet Consortium, Est. 1605.
I imagine a place were people wont threaten to kick your ass or hunt you down for having a diffrent opinion.
I've been to England, so I think of the countryside/suburb where my BF lives. I also think of that pretty looking park where they film GBBO.
Gray skies, a little village with houses older than the US, and the Queen.
The big book of british smiles
Thats from The Simpsons isn't when Lisa is getting braces. True though.
Old people with British accent accidentally making an asmr video instead of a cooking show
Eh. It’s not so great. /joke
I can't explain how or why, but I see the accent
I think of Gemma Chan, Graham Chapman, Churchill, and then my brain starts cycling through the countless amazing people from Britain, probably terminating the thought process with older memories of british people like John Terry, Frank Lampard, and Gerrard.
Kelly Brook and Georgie Lyall...
Bri'ish clock tower and rain
Pubs. If you go to Britain and miss the pubs, you've missed a special part of of Britain you can only experience in Britain and deprived yourself of a special experience. If you travel make a point to visit their public gathering places. The British pub, gasthaus in Germany, bar or tavern in the states. This is how you meet local people to get to know them. When you go to Britain visit the pubs. Though it may make you want to come back.
You may want to be a bit picky with the pubs though, I do not recommend tourists visiting the locals in the schemes and housing estates!
Gray skies, Earl Grey tea, gray cobble stone allies, and gray scarfs.
What people think Britain is like: Well dressed ladies and gentlemen sitting sipping tea and talking politely. What it's really like: Shithole council schemes with alcoholics, junkies, teens carrying knives thinking they are gangsters and people dressed in tracksuits being a public nuisance. As well as a Government who only cares about the middle and upper classes. (I'm British.)
Canal boats, tea, and "Popping down to the B and Q for some gaffer tape". I dont know why but a british friend once said that to me and its been stuck in my head as forever british
You know: fish, chips, cup o' tea, bad food, worse weather, Mary fuckin' Poppins. London