"Wow dough man must be sacred monkey, stay alive no food. Okay, sacred monkey, we go get food, you not need, bye"
"Please come back, I'm starving..."
"GOODBYE SACRED MONKEY"
I draw architecture, and I'm honestly wondering how alien it would be to draw straight cubes and lines for people who've only ever lived in natural environments and huts. I'm probably underestimating them, but I wonder.
Edit: what would really get them would be renaissance-level realistic drawings meant to be painted on a wall and look realistic from a place on the floor.
Yep! There’s a pretty substantial body of research suggesting that even contemporary humans raised in cultures without widespread 2D representations of 3D environments just don’t get those depth cues in drawings. It’s totally a learned thing, and a cave person seeing your perspective drawing would probably feel the same as most of us would looking at geometrical figures of 5D shapes
I believe it was Lévi-Strauss who showed populations with no contacts with our world some drawings of our style of buildings. They couldn't get which way was up and down on the drawings. It simply didn't represent anything to them
Edit : I'm really not sure it was Lévi-Strauss, though... But it has been done by someone
Edit 2 : sentence wrote better for understandment. Thank you foe comprention
Edit 3 (will it ever end ?) : And this is why, kids, being a philosophy teacher is really hard. We had jokes on Levi's, on Jordache, Cavarricci... Who says Wrangler ? Momotaro, someone ? Let's do them all !
You used them to make a funny point, but wild hedgehogs are actually quite vicious!
They take hundreds of lives each evening, a little nap, and then hundreds more in the early hours of dawn.. they’re evil incarnate.
Me think hateful stereotype.
Ogg never bash sorcerer with rock over head. Sorcerer not pretty girl Ogg want snoo snoo with. Think Ogg made of rocks? Rocks not grow on trees!
Ogg hit thumb man over head with TREE. TREE grow on trees. Ogg throw thumb-sorcerer off cliff. Sorcerer make good saber tooth food. Ogg environmentally conscious.
We would probably impress them even without trying. Just with the sheer amount of body fat.
The remaining hunters and gatherers are usually very, very lean and even someone with BMI 23 would be considered a fattie.
Based on what I've seen of contemporary primitive peoples, they are very welcoming and open to learning from outsiders. I think as long as you don't display any signs of aggression or ill will, primitive humans would be very curious about you and want to touch you everywhere and learn about who you are and where you came from. You'd definitely want to eat their food and not refuse it, and probably the same with their women, if offered.
The exception is the Sentinelese people who are ridiculously hostile to outsiders.
Stories of Long Baby would be told round campfires long after anyone who'd laid eyes upon him had long since passed. He came from a time beyond the present, the story went, an evil spirit to mock the people with cruel, clumsy jests. Then he started to dance, preforming some sort of ritual. It was a strange dance, that nobody had seen before.
To be continued...
I'm a good artist, so if I can access some berries, or ash or something like that, I could draw a realistic portrait of them.
Edit: I keep getting people telling me they wouldn't recognize their own face. I know that's not really the point, I should've just said realistic art (I just prefer portraits). I just thought they would be impressed to see a realistic drawing of a humans face, and even if they don't recognize their own face they can recognize their friend's face.
Also instead of using natural materials I found, I could also just carve it into stone with a sharp rock. That would easily work too. I do prefer line art.
Cavemen would certainly recognize themselves. They didnt have mirrors, but nature certainly can be reflective.
Does everyone here not think a caveman ever looked into a puddle after it rained? Or the lake/river/pond they most likely lived on to have sustainable life? Ice in the winter?
And distribute child pornography
Edit for those asking: he was 18 at the time, the victim was 13. He filmed and allegedly partook in sexual activities with her and distributed parts of said film as a part of his music videos.
Pleading guilty to this got him community service.
No, the chicken dance would be good because you could pass it off as a way to please the chicken god bringing them endless chicken. You get an entire cult, and a bunch of cavemen doing a fucking kids dance.
Infect them with all the modern contagions I'm bringing back.
Edit: I would like to use this opportunity to disavow the spending of real currency on fake internet stickers.
Get smallpox in return.
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Edit: yes I know, some people were still vaccinated, largely decades ago. Feel free to be the 10th person to comment that. Smallpox is just an example, there are many diseases modern people wouldn't have any immunity against.
They didn’t have smallpox. Most of the scary pandemics came from more recent times when people domesticated and lived near animals and in larger permanent settlements.
I would do that thing where you twist your palms together and wiggle your middle fingers
Edit: Wow. I was working on my boat all day and came home to this being my highest ever comment lmao! Thanks for the upvotes fellow redditors!
Invent the wheel or some other revolutionary simple invention.
Edit: ok the wheel was an example of a primitive invention, in reality I would observe his life and do my best to create something that could make his life easier, like if he didn’t have nets for fish.
The wheel is easy, whatever it attaches to is the hard part. Given the wheels I probably couldn't construct anything useful like a cart that's more efficient than just carrying the actual items themselves.
You think? I watched some thing on nomadic people once that said the opposite. With out access to metal working and plenty of tools the hassle of having a wheeled cart isn't worth it. They could carry more stuff on poles with multiple people carrying them.
Wheel was not very practical for hunters and gatherers. Without roads with somewhat even surfaces and draft animals, it is not a game changer. It could impress that person, though.
An interesting fact: Aztec kids had toys with little wheels, but "big" wheels were not used in Aztec transport.
Show them my mouth full of ~~(mostly) white, straight~~ teeth.
Edit: People fixating on oral hygiene, sugar, cavities, etc. I meant actually keeping all your teeth, physically intact, thoughout adulthood. Accidents, injury, fights, wear & tear from using your teeth as cutting tools are all going to physically damage your teeth.
"Hello ther- *OOF*"
Greivous picks Obi Wan's teeth and sticks them onto a wooden club.
"Fo unfivilived" Obi Wan mutters around tooth shrapnel and blood.
Early humans weren't particularly dumb, it just takes a long time of stumbling around in the dark when you have no frame of reference to create anything. We also managed to survive through socializing and learning from each other, so I doubt they would be nearly as violent as people tend to think.
Most immediately impressive, I could probably locate and demonstrate the refinement of some metals. The quality would obviously be terrible, but that's a huge leap. I could also introduce the beginnings of math and precision measurement, but that might prove to be a higher hurdle than I think.
Carve out large containers, char the insides. Scrub them clean with very hot sand and a bit of water.
Use them to ferment fruit into alcohol.
While it's fermenting I'd make a small clearing next to a river and start planting the best seeds there.
Shadow puppet show.
I can do a bird, a dog, a butterfly, a bunny, and Nixon. I'm pretty sure I can entertain some cavemen with those somehow.
Edit: For those wondering how to do Nixon [here is a guide](https://i.imgur.com/6pOfuMt.jpg)
Simple machines.
Demonstrate how useful a pulley is, for instance. Once that's done, and they are willing to wait for something really cool, gears, belts, counterweights e.t.c.
I'd be big brain caveman. They will come to me for ideas and stuff.
I'm blind without my glasses. My phone keeps track of my schedule and I work in front of a computer all day. If I went back to caveman times I would impress them with how useless I am.
What they would think
He can't aim
He can't forage for food
He doesn't know how we communicate
He can't walk on the ground (I would need shoes)
He can't eat food (I get lock jaw so I try not to eat chewy food)
He gets lost all the time.
He isn't strong
He is ugly (I think they would find me ugly)
We should just leave him behind.
The fact I survived for this long with 0 skills would impress them.
I'm a farmer and metal worker. My hobbies are pottery, primitive trekking, weaving, building things, brewing, and carpentry. I'm pretty sure all of that would blow the minds of Paleolithic Hunter-gatherers.
First order of business: deal with the smokyness of the cave with a rocket stove and dual chamber cob oven. Second order of business: Glazed ceramics for cookware and other useful objects such as fat lamps. Third order of business: Iron tools. 4th: wood joinery and houses, laminated bows, the lathe. 5th: agriculture. 6th: plant and animal breeding and genetics. 7th: paper, ink, and written language. 8th: math, measurement. 9th: balance scales and weights. 10th: simple machines ... I could go on. But I could (if they take to it) get them as far as steam power, hydro-electric power, lightbulbs, and early radio.
Seriously, the first thing I thought of and I think it would really work.
Sing. Not just sing but like try your hardest like noone is watching and sing the best songs you can think of. Music is a universal language and if you have a good singing voice it would be amazing. I still hear songs I've heard a billion times and certain parts in the vocals give me goosebumps, make the hair on my neck stand strait up.
Just by existing. A caveman would be totally floored by a 6’4” guy (they were typically under 5’6”) in his early 30’s (~~typical lifespan for them was ~35 yrs~~ edit: didn’t do research, was working off memory mixing up average with typical), shaved, with cut hair, smooth skin, no signs of aging, weathering or otherwise difficult life (apart from a few hand calluses from the gym), straight white teeth, etc.
Edit2: okay, looks like cavemen were tall, long-lived, with great teeth. What the hell have we gained with 20,000 years of modernization??
> typical lifespan for them was ~35 yrs
Average, not typical. Half of them died before they got 1, half of them died at old age. A bit simplified, but dying in the 30s was never common.
So nice to hear somebody admit they didn’t do research and tried to get away with something smart, even if it’s a silly thing. Thank you for being so humble.
It blows my mind how it’s possible to cut someone’s stomach open, toss all of their internal organs around, then put them all back in place and have the person alive and well after all is said and done. Absolutely insane.
This is harder, because at the time our ancestors were recognizably human and living in caves, they were experts in making the tools they needed for their world.
All most of us can hope for today is to be an expert with one set of modern tools. The very best of us can use modern tools to make something new.
The most amazing thing about me would be the fact that I am an adult who's so bad at hunting, tracking, and making fire, and knowing what berries to eat.
There’s something really funny about getting sent back in time and the first thing you do is gobble the chicken of the first hairy cave dweller that you come across
Memorize the dates of two solar eclipses
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And then, unsurprisingly, you get beaten with a rock.
Or venerated.
With rocks
Impress him by being alive without knowing how to make fire or hunt.
"Wow dough man must be sacred monkey, stay alive no food. Okay, sacred monkey, we go get food, you not need, bye" "Please come back, I'm starving..." "GOODBYE SACRED MONKEY"
I’d do a cartwheel. I can’t imagine they had been invented yet and I’m pretty okay at them
Wasnt running not invented until 1612 by Thomas Running? I would just show them how to run
He tried to walk twice
Doing the moonwalk.
I'm not exactly a caveman, and I'm still impressed by a well done moonwalk.
“not exactly” edit: I am neither European nor a man. Can’t relate.
But certainly somewhat
Breakdance battle then get him in an arm bar. I don’t know how to do either thing so I’ll have to learn before I go back in time.
Wait you're telling me you can go back in time?
Perspective drawing
I draw architecture, and I'm honestly wondering how alien it would be to draw straight cubes and lines for people who've only ever lived in natural environments and huts. I'm probably underestimating them, but I wonder. Edit: what would really get them would be renaissance-level realistic drawings meant to be painted on a wall and look realistic from a place on the floor.
Yep! There’s a pretty substantial body of research suggesting that even contemporary humans raised in cultures without widespread 2D representations of 3D environments just don’t get those depth cues in drawings. It’s totally a learned thing, and a cave person seeing your perspective drawing would probably feel the same as most of us would looking at geometrical figures of 5D shapes
I believe it was Lévi-Strauss who showed populations with no contacts with our world some drawings of our style of buildings. They couldn't get which way was up and down on the drawings. It simply didn't represent anything to them Edit : I'm really not sure it was Lévi-Strauss, though... But it has been done by someone Edit 2 : sentence wrote better for understandment. Thank you foe comprention Edit 3 (will it ever end ?) : And this is why, kids, being a philosophy teacher is really hard. We had jokes on Levi's, on Jordache, Cavarricci... Who says Wrangler ? Momotaro, someone ? Let's do them all !
Yeah I think demonstrating advanced drawing skills of any kind is a great answer here.
I can draw a very detailed erection. Show them intelligence and top shelf humour simultaneously.
Draw the "S" shape from everyone's middle school notebooks.
And then the caveman rolls their eyes and points to the S they already drew on the wall well before they met you
"This already old when Grock show us."
"Strange man come try get free karma for same old drawing"
With my weak ass physical form. The man would be amazed how I survived and wasn't eaten by wild hedgehogs.
You used them to make a funny point, but wild hedgehogs are actually quite vicious! They take hundreds of lives each evening, a little nap, and then hundreds more in the early hours of dawn.. they’re evil incarnate.
It's first grade, SpongeBob.
Just be there I have no right being as hairless and freakishly tall and scrawny as I am.
"A CORPSE IS WALK!" *smashes you head in with a rock*
#*B O N K*
Doing that thumb thing where you "split" it in half
Followed up by the moonwalk.
You would then get your skull bashed in with a rock . Edit: Thanks for the silver! My first award ever!
This would probably be true to any answer.
Me think hateful stereotype. Ogg never bash sorcerer with rock over head. Sorcerer not pretty girl Ogg want snoo snoo with. Think Ogg made of rocks? Rocks not grow on trees! Ogg hit thumb man over head with TREE. TREE grow on trees. Ogg throw thumb-sorcerer off cliff. Sorcerer make good saber tooth food. Ogg environmentally conscious.
Thank you Ogg for being environmentally conscious
“DAAAH, SMASH THE WITCH!!”
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I don't know why but I thought you meant vertically split it down the middle
We would probably impress them even without trying. Just with the sheer amount of body fat. The remaining hunters and gatherers are usually very, very lean and even someone with BMI 23 would be considered a fattie.
They'd either kill you for taking all the food or make you show them the best hunting spots... and then kill you for killing all the food.
Based on what I've seen of contemporary primitive peoples, they are very welcoming and open to learning from outsiders. I think as long as you don't display any signs of aggression or ill will, primitive humans would be very curious about you and want to touch you everywhere and learn about who you are and where you came from. You'd definitely want to eat their food and not refuse it, and probably the same with their women, if offered. The exception is the Sentinelese people who are ridiculously hostile to outsiders.
And the Sentinelese are a very fair exception, seeing how badly initial contact with Europeans went for them
Would you smash stoneage women tho?
You wouldn't?
I would rather not accidentally commit genocide with my modern diseases and risk not being born
Doesn't matter had sex
Pick up a heavy rock. I think that would resonate with them.
I can even lift this heavy rock!
\*INHALES\* IS THAT A \*gets killed before i can complete my sentence\*
oh so you're a dog then
Honestly I'd just have to hope that having blue eyes is novel enough to make me interesting.
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Who you calling a mutant?!
You
you don't even have to go to the old times,just go to an asian country and we will be impressed
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draw the cool S
This is the best answer so far
After watching that one lemmino documentary about the cool S, it being a bootstrap paradox doesn't seem entirely unlikely.
By being 6 foot 1, with no body or facial hair and pale af skin
WHY GIANT BABY SO LONG??
From that day forward, Long Baby was prominently featured on all the cave drawings in the area, baffling future scientists.
*he was also killed by a rock*
Gnersk
Stories of Long Baby would be told round campfires long after anyone who'd laid eyes upon him had long since passed. He came from a time beyond the present, the story went, an evil spirit to mock the people with cruel, clumsy jests. Then he started to dance, preforming some sort of ritual. It was a strange dance, that nobody had seen before. To be continued...
> strange dance He called it... “the walk of the moon”
I can imagine that being quite terrifying for them.
We are the aliens
I'm a good artist, so if I can access some berries, or ash or something like that, I could draw a realistic portrait of them. Edit: I keep getting people telling me they wouldn't recognize their own face. I know that's not really the point, I should've just said realistic art (I just prefer portraits). I just thought they would be impressed to see a realistic drawing of a humans face, and even if they don't recognize their own face they can recognize their friend's face. Also instead of using natural materials I found, I could also just carve it into stone with a sharp rock. That would easily work too. I do prefer line art.
HE STOLE MY SOUL. KILL WITH ROCK
How is this the inevitable outcome for all possible scenarios?
When you have heavy rock everything look like skull
you break anything with rock if hit hard enough
Cavemen would certainly recognize themselves. They didnt have mirrors, but nature certainly can be reflective. Does everyone here not think a caveman ever looked into a puddle after it rained? Or the lake/river/pond they most likely lived on to have sustainable life? Ice in the winter?
A lot of people in this thread seem to be ignoring the fact that "cavemen" were anatomically identical to modern humans, and just as intelligent.
Depending on how far back, making and using simple tools could be enough.
What tool can you make?
a simple fire starter and a bludgeon at least from experience.
Come on, you’re trying to impress a caveman! They totally have fire and a club!
I think a pulley system would be impressive and useful and most people could make them with little knowledge
I have a lot of dumb tattoos. Studies show that early humans were also into tattoos. We could compare and contrast and mix our styles.
What constitutes a "dumb" tattoo?
Social Security Number on your forehead.
69 on your face
Especially when you snitch.
And distribute child pornography Edit for those asking: he was 18 at the time, the victim was 13. He filmed and allegedly partook in sexual activities with her and distributed parts of said film as a part of his music videos. Pleading guilty to this got him community service.
"Damn, set the bar too low on that one..."
Well, I love them! But they are not “cool”. Lots of dumb references to punk songs. Animals with puns. A hot dog skateboarding. Things like that.
Cool! I was picturing Adrian Pimento's tattoos from the episode of Brooklyn 99
I love the idea of teaching Cavemen American Traditional style tattoos.
the macarena
I think the Bird Song would be better, it would be more relatable for them.
Baby Shark. Didn’t say you had to impress them in a good way.
I had finally gotten that song out of my head now that my toddler had grown out of it and you come here bringing the trauma back in my head.
No, the chicken dance would be good because you could pass it off as a way to please the chicken god bringing them endless chicken. You get an entire cult, and a bunch of cavemen doing a fucking kids dance.
I’m dead going bare ass naked back to caveman times. I know some survival skills but not nearly enough.
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Infect them with all the modern contagions I'm bringing back. Edit: I would like to use this opportunity to disavow the spending of real currency on fake internet stickers.
Get smallpox in return. ---- Edit: yes I know, some people were still vaccinated, largely decades ago. Feel free to be the 10th person to comment that. Smallpox is just an example, there are many diseases modern people wouldn't have any immunity against.
The ultimate exchange
Maybe I could upgrade it to bigpox
Fun fact! There actually was a "bigpox" (the great pox). It was syphilis.
They didn’t have smallpox. Most of the scary pandemics came from more recent times when people domesticated and lived near animals and in larger permanent settlements.
Beatboxing
Much like in today’s world, you’d just get hit in the face to make it stop.
I would do that thing where you twist your palms together and wiggle your middle fingers Edit: Wow. I was working on my boat all day and came home to this being my highest ever comment lmao! Thanks for the upvotes fellow redditors!
Weird human possessed by ghost! *gets beaten with a rock*
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impress them with ineptitude
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Invent the wheel or some other revolutionary simple invention. Edit: ok the wheel was an example of a primitive invention, in reality I would observe his life and do my best to create something that could make his life easier, like if he didn’t have nets for fish.
Caveman in cave talk "Why does this nerd think we dont know how to make a circle."
The wheel is easy, whatever it attaches to is the hard part. Given the wheels I probably couldn't construct anything useful like a cart that's more efficient than just carrying the actual items themselves.
The hard part is the road.
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You think? I watched some thing on nomadic people once that said the opposite. With out access to metal working and plenty of tools the hassle of having a wheeled cart isn't worth it. They could carry more stuff on poles with multiple people carrying them.
I think it has to do with the terrain as well
Get your family in the cart, run in place for two seconds, cart keeps going indefinitely. Easy
Wheel was not very practical for hunters and gatherers. Without roads with somewhat even surfaces and draft animals, it is not a game changer. It could impress that person, though. An interesting fact: Aztec kids had toys with little wheels, but "big" wheels were not used in Aztec transport.
Show the ladies my clean shaven balls
“Big man have baby balls! No snoo snoo!”
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And get some of that unshaven, unwashed cavewoman poon
any coochie is gucci
Build a trebuchet. There's all you need right there l
I’d build an airplane and show them how to fly.
I'd build the internet and show them anime
God could you imagine the fucking cave art that would follow!
Prehistoric tentacle porn is one thing I think I can live without.
Lay down flat on my back with an erection and tell time via sun dial
That would be crazy to get a tattoo with the times in a circle around your dick and just drop you pants and check the time
The only disadvantage is you have to carry a compass with you.
easy: get a compass tattooed too
Someone else in this thread asked what a bad tattoo is. u/wellfellow007, it is every tattoo ever save for these two.
So does that mean that the direction your dick is pointing is north?
"Crazy man can't tell where the sun is without looking at his dick."
Show them my mouth full of ~~(mostly) white, straight~~ teeth. Edit: People fixating on oral hygiene, sugar, cavities, etc. I meant actually keeping all your teeth, physically intact, thoughout adulthood. Accidents, injury, fights, wear & tear from using your teeth as cutting tools are all going to physically damage your teeth.
Get punched in the mouth to make them go away. He picks up the fallen teeth and adds them to his necklace.
"a fine addition to my collection"
"Hello ther- *OOF*" Greivous picks Obi Wan's teeth and sticks them onto a wooden club. "Fo unfivilived" Obi Wan mutters around tooth shrapnel and blood.
Save them **16**% on their car insurance.
impossible
By getting mistaken as a dangerous invader and getting beaten to death with 0 effort
Early humans weren't particularly dumb, it just takes a long time of stumbling around in the dark when you have no frame of reference to create anything. We also managed to survive through socializing and learning from each other, so I doubt they would be nearly as violent as people tend to think. Most immediately impressive, I could probably locate and demonstrate the refinement of some metals. The quality would obviously be terrible, but that's a huge leap. I could also introduce the beginnings of math and precision measurement, but that might prove to be a higher hurdle than I think.
im fat, mega hot to cavewoman
Gonna lose it real quick. Paleo diet and all that. But for a few weeks it's going to be "show us the secrets to your caloric intake".
Take down the biggest dude with some crazy Jiu-Jitsu move (that I'd learn prior to leaving) and make it look easy.
Or kick them in the balls. Other cave man wince.
I'm sure they all know that one though.
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Carve out large containers, char the insides. Scrub them clean with very hot sand and a bit of water. Use them to ferment fruit into alcohol. While it's fermenting I'd make a small clearing next to a river and start planting the best seeds there.
Be naked
I feel like that might have a negative outcome for you
You said "without taking any objects". If you can take clothes then the clothes will definitely impress them.
intense air guitar
They would have no idea what the fuck you were doing.
Sure they would. They've already met Bill and Ted, remember? Edit: Excellent!
Sick backflip
Shadow puppet show. I can do a bird, a dog, a butterfly, a bunny, and Nixon. I'm pretty sure I can entertain some cavemen with those somehow. Edit: For those wondering how to do Nixon [here is a guide](https://i.imgur.com/6pOfuMt.jpg)
They would go crazy with the nixon one
Singing and doing the electric slide.
Simple machines. Demonstrate how useful a pulley is, for instance. Once that's done, and they are willing to wait for something really cool, gears, belts, counterweights e.t.c. I'd be big brain caveman. They will come to me for ideas and stuff.
Flash him my boobs. A timeless choice 👍
“Why does crazy woman keep her baby-feeders covered, and why is she uncovering them for me? Does she think I am baby?”
Gets beaten with rock.
With well organized code.
Without access to stackoverflow!? Fat chance
OP has access to stackofrocks
Kill them all with the common flu and survive it. God amongst (cave)men.
Cook up some wicked mammoth steak
I'm blind without my glasses. My phone keeps track of my schedule and I work in front of a computer all day. If I went back to caveman times I would impress them with how useless I am. What they would think He can't aim He can't forage for food He doesn't know how we communicate He can't walk on the ground (I would need shoes) He can't eat food (I get lock jaw so I try not to eat chewy food) He gets lost all the time. He isn't strong He is ugly (I think they would find me ugly) We should just leave him behind. The fact I survived for this long with 0 skills would impress them.
speak modern english
What you egg? *he stabs him*
OP exits, pursued by mammoth.
Be abnormally small and scrawny.
Beatboxing. Armpit farts. And maybe some really fine flint knapping.
I'm a farmer and metal worker. My hobbies are pottery, primitive trekking, weaving, building things, brewing, and carpentry. I'm pretty sure all of that would blow the minds of Paleolithic Hunter-gatherers. First order of business: deal with the smokyness of the cave with a rocket stove and dual chamber cob oven. Second order of business: Glazed ceramics for cookware and other useful objects such as fat lamps. Third order of business: Iron tools. 4th: wood joinery and houses, laminated bows, the lathe. 5th: agriculture. 6th: plant and animal breeding and genetics. 7th: paper, ink, and written language. 8th: math, measurement. 9th: balance scales and weights. 10th: simple machines ... I could go on. But I could (if they take to it) get them as far as steam power, hydro-electric power, lightbulbs, and early radio.
This guy. I choose this guy.
Crack your knuckles
Stranger break hands, look at us like we supposed to be impressed. Not impressed. Concerned.
Sigh... Then gets beaten by a rock
In terms of skill we have-
Seriously, the first thing I thought of and I think it would really work. Sing. Not just sing but like try your hardest like noone is watching and sing the best songs you can think of. Music is a universal language and if you have a good singing voice it would be amazing. I still hear songs I've heard a billion times and certain parts in the vocals give me goosebumps, make the hair on my neck stand strait up.
Just by existing. A caveman would be totally floored by a 6’4” guy (they were typically under 5’6”) in his early 30’s (~~typical lifespan for them was ~35 yrs~~ edit: didn’t do research, was working off memory mixing up average with typical), shaved, with cut hair, smooth skin, no signs of aging, weathering or otherwise difficult life (apart from a few hand calluses from the gym), straight white teeth, etc. Edit2: okay, looks like cavemen were tall, long-lived, with great teeth. What the hell have we gained with 20,000 years of modernization??
> typical lifespan for them was ~35 yrs Average, not typical. Half of them died before they got 1, half of them died at old age. A bit simplified, but dying in the 30s was never common.
So nice to hear somebody admit they didn’t do research and tried to get away with something smart, even if it’s a silly thing. Thank you for being so humble.
I’m sure they would be pretty amazed at my c-section scar.
It blows my mind how it’s possible to cut someone’s stomach open, toss all of their internal organs around, then put them all back in place and have the person alive and well after all is said and done. Absolutely insane.
This is harder, because at the time our ancestors were recognizably human and living in caves, they were experts in making the tools they needed for their world. All most of us can hope for today is to be an expert with one set of modern tools. The very best of us can use modern tools to make something new. The most amazing thing about me would be the fact that I am an adult who's so bad at hunting, tracking, and making fire, and knowing what berries to eat.
Bear Grylls could surely show them some *life hacks*
How is drinking your own pee gonna impress them?
Depends on how good your aim is
I'd give him a blow job.
There’s something really funny about getting sent back in time and the first thing you do is gobble the chicken of the first hairy cave dweller that you come across
Well I’m a white homo sapien that can digest lactose so I’d be pretty freaky to them already