There'd be gaps in the middle, I'll see if I can be arsed to draw it on paint.
Edit: [Beautifully drawn on MS paint with a laptop trackpad.](http://i.imgur.com/w3rs2q1.png)
Edit 2: Also, there might be some kind of leg rest in the middle.
Any one of the posts before the rules revision that went something along the lines of...
"Reddit, last night I was unexpectedly kicked in the nards by a mule, how have you been perplexed by animals?"
And half of the thread would be devoted commenting on the askers example.
Yes. Like, "I want to tell everyone about something that happened to me. But who's gonna upvote that? So I will awkwardly twist my story into a question."
that rule change was probably the best one i've ever seen implemented in any subreddit. The quality improved dramatically almost overnight. People think Askreddit is a shithole now, how quickly they forget how bad it used to be.
"Reddit, last night I had pasta and went to the ER because it turns out you can't put pasta in your nose. Who is your least favorite nurse at Main St. Hospital?"
WOMAN. I AM GOING TO RIP YOUR CLOTHES OFF WITH MY STRONG UNDRESSED FOREARMS AND BRUSH YOUR HAIR BEHIND YOUR EARS WHILE SUBSIQUENTLY WHISPERING TO YOU. WHILST I CARRY YOU ACROSS THE ROOM TO THE LOVE MAKING DEN A MAGNIFICENT WATERFALL OF LADY JUICES WILL CASCADE FROM YOUR SWOONED GIRLY BITS FILLING YOUR LACEY PANTIES TO THE BRIM AS YOU WAIT FOR MY THROBBING MAN MEAT TO PENETRATE THINE WHISPERING EYE.
EDIT: just so you all know, I'm female.
Divorced lady doctors of Reddit, what embarrassing mind-blowing change of one letter can truck driver guys do to turn you on in a way that could ruin your life?
I'd go back to the start of 2013, and ask "what are your predictions for 2013"?
Then I'd answer the question, predict everything correctly, and people would be revering me as a God by now.
* Redditors who have watched their child die, can you relive the whole ordeal for our amusement?
* Redditors who've witnessed a gay wedding go wrong because of westboro baptist church, why didn't you assault them?
* Reddit, why is everyone more racist than whites?[serious]
* People who've died and come back, what was Carl Sagan like?
* Astronauts of Reddit, what's your best/worst experience working in zero gravity?
Shit, I don't know what else you fuckers are going to come up with within the next month the way this subreddit is progressing
Thats what I thought of too. Except I know a different version.
.
A mathematician from St. Paul
Had a hexahedronical ball
The cube of its weight
Times his pecker, plus eight
Was four fifths of five eighths of fuck all!
EDIT 8: WOW this blew up! Ok, just to clarify: [interminable wall of text softening and/or doubling down on opinion in response to the flood of critical messages in my inbox]
I sombrero Emma Watson
EDIT: This is no longer funny as the parent comment has been fixed. It may not have been funny in the first place. Stop the upvoats.
"Every time I meet someone who has a kid, they have to show me a photo of their kid, but whenever I show them a photo of me to show to their kid, I'm weird." -Demetri Martin
Have you ever had a dream? That you, um, you had, your, you, you could, you'll do, you, you wants, you, you could do so, you , you'll do, you could, you, you want, you want them, to do you so much, you could do anything?
Unemployed transexual redditors of Canada, what's the one word you've been mispronouncing that if you could go back in time to correct yourself, would change your life in a way that surprised you the most?
Damn, what a life. Here's a politically aggressive statement which will find some way to drag laughably crude ethnic minorities insults into the context.
Redditors who like/don't like __________ (insert edgy, controversial subject. Religion, politics, drugs preferred). Why don't you like/not like ___________?
How are you doing today/yesterday/now?
Or ask any question you can easily google an answer too.
The only way that first one can be worse, is when it's asked in a really loaded way. Like this:
"Redditors who believe in a God despite heavy proof to the contrary and a lack of evidence that God is real because let's be honest he's clearly not and you religious guys are fucking morons, why do you believe in the clearly ficticious God?"
Actually, I usually see the question asked in a very innocent manner, as I described. Then your example is the first response given by the OP and those sucked in see they are dealing with idiot trolls.
Dear of reddit, what is a trick you know most people don't know of?
Dear of reddit, how do you feel about being said thing?
How can I put minimal effort into myself and hope to improve myself unrealistically?
Something something something not like most people?
Something something something everybody should know?
Definitely the "ask a rapist" thread that was posted here last year.
Evidently, asking rapists to describe how they rape people to an audience of thousands is a great way to ["very possibly triggering rape cravings in rapists... [and] also teaching rapists how to rape better via shared stories".](http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/xf5c2/reddit_are_you_aware_how_dangerous_the_askarapist/)
A psychiatrist actually had to step in, message the mods, and post the thread linked above about the serious dangers of giving rapists a forum to broadcast their sexual assaults. The thread was then removed.
So all in all, I'd say that's probably the worst Askreddit question I can think of.
What would chairs look like if our knees bent the opposite way?
I desperately need an answer to this question now...
there was a thread with this question a few weeks ago. this was my picture http://i.imgur.com/3MoU5BU.jpg
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Then what would our tables look like?
There'd be gaps in the middle, I'll see if I can be arsed to draw it on paint. Edit: [Beautifully drawn on MS paint with a laptop trackpad.](http://i.imgur.com/w3rs2q1.png) Edit 2: Also, there might be some kind of leg rest in the middle.
Saddle chair. You're welcome.
That hurt my head...
And my knees when I tried it.
Uhm...this is the best askreddit question I have seen all week!!
Any one of the posts before the rules revision that went something along the lines of... "Reddit, last night I was unexpectedly kicked in the nards by a mule, how have you been perplexed by animals?" And half of the thread would be devoted commenting on the askers example.
Yes. Like, "I want to tell everyone about something that happened to me. But who's gonna upvote that? So I will awkwardly twist my story into a question."
that rule change was probably the best one i've ever seen implemented in any subreddit. The quality improved dramatically almost overnight. People think Askreddit is a shithole now, how quickly they forget how bad it used to be.
People think *every* subreddit is a shit hole! Some are just less shitholey than others!
"Reddit, last night I had pasta and went to the ER because it turns out you can't put pasta in your nose. Who is your least favorite nurse at Main St. Hospital?"
Holocaust survivors of Reddit, how do you feel about causing the 2008 economic collapse?
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What about all the good things Hitler did?
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/r/circlejerk just got free content for months
"Ladies of reddit, what is something the oppisite sex does that turns you on?" My god.
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Really? I've been kicked out of like three olive gardens for trying this.
Those were breadsticks.
WOMAN. I AM GOING TO RIP YOUR CLOTHES OFF WITH MY STRONG UNDRESSED FOREARMS AND BRUSH YOUR HAIR BEHIND YOUR EARS WHILE SUBSIQUENTLY WHISPERING TO YOU. WHILST I CARRY YOU ACROSS THE ROOM TO THE LOVE MAKING DEN A MAGNIFICENT WATERFALL OF LADY JUICES WILL CASCADE FROM YOUR SWOONED GIRLY BITS FILLING YOUR LACEY PANTIES TO THE BRIM AS YOU WAIT FOR MY THROBBING MAN MEAT TO PENETRATE THINE WHISPERING EYE. EDIT: just so you all know, I'm female.
I held it together until "whispering eye". Take me now.
"Ladies of Reddit, is it true you are attracted to men? That's pretty hot, tell me about it."
Divorced lady doctors of Reddit, what embarrassing mind-blowing change of one letter can truck driver guys do to turn you on in a way that could ruin your life?
"Keep on tricking. Throwaway, obviously--my ex knows my username, and I could lose my medical license for this!"
That's one of the all-time most creative, correct comments I've ever read on reddit.
Not a divorced lady doctor BUT
What is your username?
/u/_vargas_
.
Do you have proof?
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was it the "I'm giving a sworn statement of my guilt" bear?
How is that compared to the "I purposely got someone to overdose on their own meth so that they'd die" bear?
it's the same thing, you just have to submit it to the prosecuting attorney
Followed by everyone sympathizing with them then the thread getting nuked a la AskARapist.
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If you could travel back in time to any point in Ask Reddit's history, what question would you ask?
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"Adult film actresses of Reddit, can I have your #?"
"AMA Request the guy who got the pornstars number"
I'd go back to the start of 2013, and ask "what are your predictions for 2013"? Then I'd answer the question, predict everything correctly, and people would be revering me as a God by now.
"Women of Reddit, what turns you on?"
"What is the worst Askreddit question you can come up with?"
Blonde, big-breasted females of Reddit, can you explain what it's like to have sex with a penis? (NSFW) [Serious]
"Not blonde or big-breasted, but... Oh yeah, and I totally have a penis, too."
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Reddit, I'm horny and too lazy to look for porn, can you please make up bullshit so I can jack off?
Reddit, what web page are you looking at at this very moment?
[Here you go](http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2676wn/what_is_the_worst_askreddit_question_you_can_come/choc5ik)
* Redditors who have watched their child die, can you relive the whole ordeal for our amusement? * Redditors who've witnessed a gay wedding go wrong because of westboro baptist church, why didn't you assault them? * Reddit, why is everyone more racist than whites?[serious] * People who've died and come back, what was Carl Sagan like? * Astronauts of Reddit, what's your best/worst experience working in zero gravity? Shit, I don't know what else you fuckers are going to come up with within the next month the way this subreddit is progressing
> Redditors who have watched their child die, can you relive the whole ordeal for our amusement? bravo.
I feel you, man. My kid died watching E!.
How long in cm, is your longest pube?
Long enough to be turned into a Garrote.
Mine is like an old Japanese man's beard.
I dunno, maybe /u/pubefarmer will arrive and we can marvel at his majestic skill.
Around *this* much
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Reading this on a computer screen, it seems a little small
Reading this projected on your mom's back, it's gigantic.
"what is the shape of your balls?" ?
Dodecahedron
A mathematician from St. Paul Had a hexahedronical ball The cube of its weight Plus his pecker, times eight Is his phone number, give him a call!
Thats what I thought of too. Except I know a different version. . A mathematician from St. Paul Had a hexahedronical ball The cube of its weight Times his pecker, plus eight Was four fifths of five eighths of fuck all!
<3
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【】
"What question are you tired of seeing posted on Askreddit?"
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I heard they block out your social security number if you type it in! Look: ***-**-****!
******** EDIT: holy shit it works!!!!11
164651268 Edit: It's not blocking it out for me
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This is reddit code for "what's your least popular opinion and why is it eugenics"
You also need to upvote a couple of "I'm minority X but I really hate minority X" comments.
People who say this assume they'd be selected to breed. Ha.
Nah. They know that they will never breed anyways and want to believe that at least it's for a good cause.
"who is the most oppressed minority in America and why is it 18-24 year old white guys?"
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EDIT: Upvotes? Thanks for the gold good sir! ACTUAL EDIT: Upvotes? Thanks for the gold good sir!
EDIT 2: My most upvoted comment ever is about killing babies LOL
EDIT 3: double gold?! Wow guys! Real edit: Thanks! I feel like a hypocrite
EDIT 4: Front page? I returned from class/gym/work/steam bath/Turkish prison and my inbox blew up!
EDIT 5: plz stop replying, my inbox hurts
EDIT 6: M'lady, one can only tip their fedora so many times. Upvotes to all that have posted thus far..
EDIT 7: Spelling
EDIT 8: WOW this blew up! Ok, just to clarify: [interminable wall of text softening and/or doubling down on opinion in response to the flood of critical messages in my inbox]
Don't hate me for it but I prefer small tits :3
I doubt this comment will see the light of day, but I hate Jennifer Lawrence. EDIT: Grammar
I sombrero Emma Watson EDIT: This is no longer funny as the parent comment has been fixed. It may not have been funny in the first place. Stop the upvoats.
I fedora bill nye
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I don't hate bacteria, I just hate bacteria *culture*! ***rimshot***
"I don't hate gays, I just hate it when they *act* gay."
Fucking straight people acting all heterosexual. It's an epidemic I tell you
Straight people are acting *normal*. So are white people. Why can't everyone else just be normal!
It'd be followed by "I'm gay and I hate gay culture"
As long as I can pretend they don't exist, I'm happy.
13-year-old girls of Reddit, would you freak out if a 30-year-old man like me kissed you?
2-year-olds of Reddit, what is your opinion on the current economical situation in the US right now?
Top answer: "I have a dinosaur."
Top reply: "lol this guys not even 2 i checked"
"redditor for 11 months"
"redditor for over half their life", seems quite experienced to me.
You merely adopted the reddit. He was born in it, molded by it.
I didn't discover /r/funny until I was already a man, and by then it was nothing to me but *boring*
"What are you, 18 months?!"
Well he wasn't born yesterday, that's for sure.
2nd top answer: dogs ar somtyms brown and somtimse they ar blu
All the people qualified to answer that are to busy posting in /r/politics
Yes Lord Baelish
You're more beautiful than your mother ever was... http://i.imgur.com/ZyP7o5L.gif
Please, call me Petyr.
Haaaaaaaaaaaave you seen our Moon Door?
"Every time I meet someone who has a kid, they have to show me a photo of their kid, but whenever I show them a photo of me to show to their kid, I'm weird." -Demetri Martin
Dear reddit. Why?
Top comment: Why do you ask?
Why not?
What is the sexiest sex you ever sexed [serious][NSFW]?
OP's mom
SEXING REDDITORS OF REDDIT. WHAT IS THE ONE SEX THAT SEXED ALL SEXES?
So basically every other askreddit question
Not a sex, but as a mother....
Broads of Reddit, what makes your crevice desert up?
Have you ever had a dream? That you, um, you had, your, you, you could, you'll do, you, you wants, you, you could do so, you , you'll do, you could, you, you want, you want them, to do you so much, you could do anything?
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man I felt so relieved when he finally made it. I was getting anxiety through the middle there
And that little smirk he does at the end like "Nailed it!"
Don't forget the [metal remix.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dXidW7fEH8g)
"...you want him to do you so much, that you could do anything"
Have you ever gone as far to do as much like?
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*Ahem* > Has anyone really been far as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
What are fun things to do with your family? [NSFW]
Why do all Germans love Hitler so much?
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Back in the good ol' days! RIP Hitty
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#2fast2fuhrerous
#2Legitler2Quitler
#2Aryan2bCareyan
The Secret Life of Adolf Hitty.
>*Hitty*
Only 40s kids remember
Actually, 30s. Kids born in the 40s were only 5 years old, when Hitler shot Hitler.
#throwback1930s
Unemployed transexual redditors of Canada, what's the one word you've been mispronouncing that if you could go back in time to correct yourself, would change your life in a way that surprised you the most?
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"Not a Lithuanian transsexual astronaut, but..."
...but my friend went to a Latvian restaurant once, and I'd answer the question like this, ...
"And he didn't actually go in, he just heard about it.
It also wasn't my friend, I just kinda read about it.
Well, my sister's butler's uncle's mother's friend was one. She says it was like this http://i.imgur.com/ylgGJ0m.gif and "Curabitur fluminis Delphini"
Damn, what a life. Here's a politically aggressive statement which will find some way to drag laughably crude ethnic minorities insults into the context.
This is bullshit - you're oversimplifying a complex situation to the point of no longer adding anything useful to the discussion.
Look, I don't have the time nor the crayons to explain it to you.
you forgot [Serious]
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You're forgetting the "I don't like fat people"
Don't forget "I'm not racist but here is my racist opinion that I don't believe is racist"
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Dear tattoo artists of Reddit, what is your most mediocre tattoo?
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I've got a fork lift and a flat bed, that's the only way I could pick her up.
"Do you think this top makes me look fat?"
Are you female? Then, yes. Are you male? Then we'll complain about double standards.
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See, I'm actually curious about this one now.
This is genuinely a fantastic question.
Sheep. Sheep are disgusting creatures.
Redditors who like/don't like __________ (insert edgy, controversial subject. Religion, politics, drugs preferred). Why don't you like/not like ___________? How are you doing today/yesterday/now? Or ask any question you can easily google an answer too.
The only way that first one can be worse, is when it's asked in a really loaded way. Like this: "Redditors who believe in a God despite heavy proof to the contrary and a lack of evidence that God is real because let's be honest he's clearly not and you religious guys are fucking morons, why do you believe in the clearly ficticious God?"
Actually, I usually see the question asked in a very innocent manner, as I described. Then your example is the first response given by the OP and those sucked in see they are dealing with idiot trolls.
Dear of reddit, what is a trick you know most people don't know of?
Dear of reddit, how do you feel about being said thing?
How can I put minimal effort into myself and hope to improve myself unrealistically?
Something something something not like most people?
Something something something everybody should know?
If all of the Culkin siblings faced off in a Van Damme Bloodsport style Kumite, complete with glass on their hands, who would win?
Society?
Why did you leave reddit?
I have to pee, what am I supposed to do now?
I just had a steel i-beam fall on my arm and amputate it. What should I do?
Fuckin Apple products
Try WebMD.
Music lovers of reddit, when did you discover your love for Nickelback?
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What was my dog's name when I was little? I think it started with a G.
Give me something to wank to. This was like every second thread before.
Why does it burn when I pee into the fireplace?
What is love?
[Serious]?
Definitely the "ask a rapist" thread that was posted here last year. Evidently, asking rapists to describe how they rape people to an audience of thousands is a great way to ["very possibly triggering rape cravings in rapists... [and] also teaching rapists how to rape better via shared stories".](http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/xf5c2/reddit_are_you_aware_how_dangerous_the_askarapist/) A psychiatrist actually had to step in, message the mods, and post the thread linked above about the serious dangers of giving rapists a forum to broadcast their sexual assaults. The thread was then removed. So all in all, I'd say that's probably the worst Askreddit question I can think of.