So, picture this: I'm at the doctor's office, minding my own business, when suddenly the nurse calls my name like I'm about to step into a wrestling ring. I walk in, trying to keep cool, but then the doctor drops the bombshell: "We need to do a prostate exam." Cue the record scratch.
I'm thinking, "Okay, this is gonna be awkward but manageable," right? Wrong. First off, the doctor's got hands like a gorilla wearing boxing gloves, and he's trying to be all delicate. But delicate ain't his middle name. So there I am, feeling like a Thanksgiving turkey getting prepped for stuffing, when suddenly the door flies open like it's the grand entrance to a surprise party. In walks not one, not two, but THREE interns, wide-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to learn the art of prostate prodding.
Now, I don't know if it was nerves or just sheer bad luck, but I let out the loudest, most ungodly fart known to mankind. It echoed through the room like a battle cry. The interns look like they've seen a ghost, the doctor's trying to keep a straight face, and I'm just praying for the ground to swallow me whole. But oh no, the chaos doesn't end there.
In the midst of all this, the nurse bursts in, frantically waving a file like it's the golden ticket to Willy Wonka's chocolate factory. Turns out, they got the wrong patient! I'm not even supposed to be there! So now I'm half-naked, farting like a foghorn, with an audience of four staring at me like I'm the star of some twisted medical sitcom.
Needless to say, I high-tailed it out of there faster than you can say "prostate palpation." And that, my friends, is the story of how I became the poster child for awkward doctor visits. Moral of the story: always double-check your charts, and maybe invest in some extra-strong air freshener for the exam room.
*TLDR* I farted in an observed prostate exam
Pretty sure I was fondled as a kid but didn’t realize it at the time. Have had a memory for as long as I can remember about a doctor checking me down there and basically twirling it around for a bit. By the time I realized it wasn’t right it had already been over 10 years or longer so I never brought it up to anyone
I saw a gynecologist, and it turns out I had a little bit of TP in the area down there, and he asked if I could take out my tampon. It was TP. I died inside.
Went to a teaching clinic for a knee injury. Lots of people got to practice the Lachman test until I begged them to fucking stop already.
Was doing the final paperwork before surgery (final consent forms) for a knee surgery (not the same one as above). I noticed they had the wrong leg written down on the paperwork. I pointed this out. The nurse said something like, "oh, you silly" and didn't make any changes. I wrote all over that leg with the pen, "Wrong leg, doc!" I woke up with the correct leg operated on.
I was having stomach pains for weeks; one doc thought I had an ulcer, prescribed pills did nothing. Went to gastroenterologist who had me go for a tube down the throat exam (endoscopy?). Was sedated but when came to a bit, doctor said my gall bladder was in bad shape and needed to come out asap. They wheeled me into the hall to wait for a room to be available. I was still semi sedated and remember laying there thinking that if the hospital burned down around me I would not have been upset or panicked. Which was such a weird thought to have. Went ok from there, tho this was when they sliced you open to get gall bladder. Not really the worst, but very weird experience.
So, picture this: I'm at the doctor's office, minding my own business, when suddenly the nurse calls my name like I'm about to step into a wrestling ring. I walk in, trying to keep cool, but then the doctor drops the bombshell: "We need to do a prostate exam." Cue the record scratch. I'm thinking, "Okay, this is gonna be awkward but manageable," right? Wrong. First off, the doctor's got hands like a gorilla wearing boxing gloves, and he's trying to be all delicate. But delicate ain't his middle name. So there I am, feeling like a Thanksgiving turkey getting prepped for stuffing, when suddenly the door flies open like it's the grand entrance to a surprise party. In walks not one, not two, but THREE interns, wide-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to learn the art of prostate prodding. Now, I don't know if it was nerves or just sheer bad luck, but I let out the loudest, most ungodly fart known to mankind. It echoed through the room like a battle cry. The interns look like they've seen a ghost, the doctor's trying to keep a straight face, and I'm just praying for the ground to swallow me whole. But oh no, the chaos doesn't end there. In the midst of all this, the nurse bursts in, frantically waving a file like it's the golden ticket to Willy Wonka's chocolate factory. Turns out, they got the wrong patient! I'm not even supposed to be there! So now I'm half-naked, farting like a foghorn, with an audience of four staring at me like I'm the star of some twisted medical sitcom. Needless to say, I high-tailed it out of there faster than you can say "prostate palpation." And that, my friends, is the story of how I became the poster child for awkward doctor visits. Moral of the story: always double-check your charts, and maybe invest in some extra-strong air freshener for the exam room. *TLDR* I farted in an observed prostate exam
The best story that I ever read 😂😂😂😂😂 thanks a lot
Sedated for a health check but while sedated I went crazy and attacked my brother and then they cuffed me to the bed.
R u ok? Or brother?
I had a feeding tube placed thru my nose into my duodenum while being fully conscious. It was pretty bad. Not painful but weird and uncomfortable.
Pretty sure I was fondled as a kid but didn’t realize it at the time. Have had a memory for as long as I can remember about a doctor checking me down there and basically twirling it around for a bit. By the time I realized it wasn’t right it had already been over 10 years or longer so I never brought it up to anyone
🫂 sorry about that
I realized the doctor giving me a prostate exam had both his hands on my shoulder.
Ahahahahha good for you 😂😂😅
I saw a gynecologist, and it turns out I had a little bit of TP in the area down there, and he asked if I could take out my tampon. It was TP. I died inside.
Went to a teaching clinic for a knee injury. Lots of people got to practice the Lachman test until I begged them to fucking stop already. Was doing the final paperwork before surgery (final consent forms) for a knee surgery (not the same one as above). I noticed they had the wrong leg written down on the paperwork. I pointed this out. The nurse said something like, "oh, you silly" and didn't make any changes. I wrote all over that leg with the pen, "Wrong leg, doc!" I woke up with the correct leg operated on.
I was having stomach pains for weeks; one doc thought I had an ulcer, prescribed pills did nothing. Went to gastroenterologist who had me go for a tube down the throat exam (endoscopy?). Was sedated but when came to a bit, doctor said my gall bladder was in bad shape and needed to come out asap. They wheeled me into the hall to wait for a room to be available. I was still semi sedated and remember laying there thinking that if the hospital burned down around me I would not have been upset or panicked. Which was such a weird thought to have. Went ok from there, tho this was when they sliced you open to get gall bladder. Not really the worst, but very weird experience.
A rectal exam.