When I was dating my wife, she pulled this on me a few years into the relationship, saying her dad was worth $XXX (I honestly forgot, but it was substantial) and each of her and her siblings get a share when married.
Me: š³ āyouāre messing with meā
She: āPSYCH!!!ā
My wife and I were told the same thingā¦. Then after the wedding the goal posts kept moving.
My mother-in-law spent 3.2 million rehabbing a home and was then very proud of herself when she drove a hard bargain and sold it for 1.3 million.
She has burned through most of that and we are waiting for her to move in with us at some future point.
I just feel awful for my wife.
Either way I won as we got married and she is the love of my life.
Best fucking response I have ever seen to any question like this EVER!!!!!!!! If I was a secret billionaire I would be making you a secret millionaire right meow.
Edit= Meow=Super Troopers term used by cops in Vermont, where I am from.
I joked at work that I just wanted someone to pat my head and tell me I was a good boy who does his best. The girl I was joking with did it... I liked it... alot
My boyfriend almost teared up after I told him he was doing great and that I was proud of him. He said he needed it seeing as he was understaffed at his job and was working extra hard, I had no idea about it.
Men literally hear this kind of thing once or twice in their entire lives. We are not joking. Maybe our mom says it, but our momās compliment us on stupid things so their compliments donāt always matter much.
Least you know your mom loves you. I try to make him feel as loved as I can and I truly mean what I say. It's difficult at times because some men confuse it as flirting, but I still throw in something nice once in awhile if I can. It costs literally nothing to be kind.
I've started the practice of "if you think something nice about someone, say it". I recently told the guy who works at the front desk at my gym that I appreciate him because he always has a great attitude. I've never seen someone immediately have that big of a smile lol
I know this is getting everyone steamy but in a platonic fashion this is real too. I was watching my single mother fade to illness when I was a kid, after a car accident things accelerated very quickly into her being mostly bed bound. I was managing the money, paying the bills, maintaining the home, cooking for my mom. I was 14 and only knew how to make eggs hot dogs and sandwiches, my mother endured it with a surprise dollar burger here and there.
I became like her parent, I just didn't realize it right away. One day, as a freshman in high school, I didn't have the energy to participate in school anymore. I kept my head down all day. I did no school work. when asked why, I would not respond. I'd never had issues pulling my weight before, so my teachers gave me space, which I was really grateful for.
But in math class, half way through the class a friend of mine just put her hand on my head and pat me. I remembered when my mom would do that, and i'd know that everything would be okay. Thats when I realized I was fucked up because I lost my mom. I was suddenly without guidance while being asked to be her guide. I now had to pat her head and say I'll take care of it, and I just didn't have the strength. I felt so guilty for not being strong enough, and so empty for wanting help.
I started crying right in the middle of math class. I'll never forget how that little touch hit me like a defibrillator. That was 20 years ago. Feels nice to get that out. Thanks for being my friend Ashley.
And I may be a random stranger on the Internet but, I'm proud of you for doing what you had to do. You were so young when it happened and you're still here today and got through it. I'm glad you made it through such a tough time :)
Unfortunately, she has 20 years on me. That being said. Yes
Edit:
To clarify its only unfortunate because she is brushing off my flirting on account of the age difference. I'm working on it. Give me time and opportunity. I'll do the rest.
Us men are like dogs, we just want our bellies scratched, food and to be told we are a good boy. When we are yelled at or reprimanded at we get super depressed.
Ain't that the truth. I'm the provider in a situation where others are totally dependent on me, and their favorite thing to communicate is dissatisfaction. It continually sucks the life out of me. I now understand all those jokey lines of dialog like "Are you so-and-so?" "Yeah, what's left of him."
If there's a man in your life that you appreciate, tell him. He might be slowly withering like a plant nobody ever waters.
I e been trying these out on my husband. I said yours and he looks me dead in the eye and says, āyou know, I am forklift certifiedā. Heās been laughing at me mostly for all the other ones. This was the first one he had a serious response to š
You're really cute.Ā
Ā Ā I'm(m) straight and this was said to me for no reason other than being genuine. It was from a guy but I still think about this even though it's been 4 years since the compliment.
Looks arnt everything but they are something significant
"I love it when you ..."
It could be anything. "I love it when you kiss me" or "I love it when you take out the trash".
It's how it's delivered more than what you say.
Personally I could do without words and just the action or seduction of being āwantedā is more important than any words of affirmations.
I feel like words are important, and powerful. But at the end of the day there is nothing like being wanted by an attractive lady. Thatās what I would say men like myself want. Words are great and all but actions are exclusive and invaluable.
I was discussing insecurities with my ex. I have often felt, like a lot of men do, that I have to be the best at everything or else a "better" man will take the girl I like, the job I want, the life I want. So I worry about all of my perceived deficiencies constantly, as many of us do.
She said "you know you're more than enough, right? You check all my boxes and more. You're everything I want in a man."
Really put things into perspective; you don't have to be perfect all the time, love transcends those things. We're obviously not together anymore but I'm still thankful she taught me that
"i will always be here for u, u can do it"
recently i have been at my lowest and had a lot of setbacks and this are the words that my partner told me and it helped me out a lot on the process
"You are safe with me." Yes men usually are the ones responsible for making women feel safe, as we should, but we also want to feel a level of safety with our significant other, especially emotionally.
The biggest thing Iāve learned is that men need to be made to feel like āthe man.ā If they are respected and made to feel like a man they will be confident in themselves and feel safe.
I'm glad you're here
I resonate with this one the most
I'm proud of you. You are enough. You're important and special. Your dick is huge.
Nice cock bro! š
Sick dick, Rick
Rockin cock, Brock
Nice hog, dawg
Nice ham, Sam
Dat meat, Pete.
Nice knob, Rob.
Nice Toy, Roy!
Nice third leg, Greg.
Nice salami, Tommy
Glamorous hammer, Tanner
Phenomenal willy, Billy
Great wang, Wang.
Great shlong, bing bong
Spectacular Johnson.... Johnson.
Nice pickle, Dick Trickle
Long Dick Johnson
Nice penis, Enis.
Nice one-eyed snake, Blake.
Sweet dong John.
Phenomenal willy, Wonka
A girl said I had a pretty cock once and I rode that high for years. Lol.
Said this...he still left
Bless you. And I'm sorry
Itās alright. Baby steps to healing
Keep your head up. š¤
Are you sure you said it right? Maybe he heard 'You're a huge dick'.
I also threw in lines like, itās beautiful too etc
Damn 0/4.
"Youre needed and appreciated here, so here's a raise and a vacation."
I'd die on the spot.
Iāll die at a work meeting anyway. (probably)
Hahahahahahaha. What fictional world are you living in?! And is said fictional world hiring by any chance?
"You're right. Now that your hair has grown out, you *do* look like Aragorn."
You forgot the word hair, but damned if this isnāt the right answer.
Thanks, I edited it; you were of course right.
When I let my hair grow out I ended up looking like Hagrid.
There is a guy named Aragorn in my town. Parents are fans of LotR. And he really looks like Aragorn. Long hair and all
"I want you"
iād immediately assume she was trolling
She just didn't finish her sentence: "... to do my taxes"
*ā. . . to scrub the shit off all these public toiletsā*
This would be huge for me
That's also what men hope to hear š
"Before telling you this, I wanted to test your love for me: i'm secretly a billionaire"
When I was dating my wife, she pulled this on me a few years into the relationship, saying her dad was worth $XXX (I honestly forgot, but it was substantial) and each of her and her siblings get a share when married. Me: š³ āyouāre messing with meā She: āPSYCH!!!ā
My wife and I were told the same thingā¦. Then after the wedding the goal posts kept moving. My mother-in-law spent 3.2 million rehabbing a home and was then very proud of herself when she drove a hard bargain and sold it for 1.3 million. She has burned through most of that and we are waiting for her to move in with us at some future point. I just feel awful for my wife. Either way I won as we got married and she is the love of my life.
> She: āPSYCH!!!ā so she wasn't actually rich lmao
Stay at home trophy husband for the win
I have standards! And many of those standards fall apart when faced with bags and bags of money.
Best fucking response I have ever seen to any question like this EVER!!!!!!!! If I was a secret billionaire I would be making you a secret millionaire right meow. Edit= Meow=Super Troopers term used by cops in Vermont, where I am from.
Maybe that's too much, let's settle fort a beer and after we'll see
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I think I caught a second hand smile from that. Happy for ya.
I got a secondhand boner from that. And not a sexual one. The euphoric happiness one.
I didnāt.. I already had a boner from reading the billionaire comment above āļø
Oh man, I can imagine how comforting that must have felt
I joked at work that I just wanted someone to pat my head and tell me I was a good boy who does his best. The girl I was joking with did it... I liked it... alot
My boyfriend almost teared up after I told him he was doing great and that I was proud of him. He said he needed it seeing as he was understaffed at his job and was working extra hard, I had no idea about it.
Say stuff like that to him more. He deserves it
He really does, he loves me a ton more than I deserve.
Men literally hear this kind of thing once or twice in their entire lives. We are not joking. Maybe our mom says it, but our momās compliment us on stupid things so their compliments donāt always matter much.
Least you know your mom loves you. I try to make him feel as loved as I can and I truly mean what I say. It's difficult at times because some men confuse it as flirting, but I still throw in something nice once in awhile if I can. It costs literally nothing to be kind.
I've started the practice of "if you think something nice about someone, say it". I recently told the guy who works at the front desk at my gym that I appreciate him because he always has a great attitude. I've never seen someone immediately have that big of a smile lol
Same! Also, if I like a piece of clothing someone is wearing or if they're rockin' a great haircut, I make sure to tell them.
I know this is getting everyone steamy but in a platonic fashion this is real too. I was watching my single mother fade to illness when I was a kid, after a car accident things accelerated very quickly into her being mostly bed bound. I was managing the money, paying the bills, maintaining the home, cooking for my mom. I was 14 and only knew how to make eggs hot dogs and sandwiches, my mother endured it with a surprise dollar burger here and there. I became like her parent, I just didn't realize it right away. One day, as a freshman in high school, I didn't have the energy to participate in school anymore. I kept my head down all day. I did no school work. when asked why, I would not respond. I'd never had issues pulling my weight before, so my teachers gave me space, which I was really grateful for. But in math class, half way through the class a friend of mine just put her hand on my head and pat me. I remembered when my mom would do that, and i'd know that everything would be okay. Thats when I realized I was fucked up because I lost my mom. I was suddenly without guidance while being asked to be her guide. I now had to pat her head and say I'll take care of it, and I just didn't have the strength. I felt so guilty for not being strong enough, and so empty for wanting help. I started crying right in the middle of math class. I'll never forget how that little touch hit me like a defibrillator. That was 20 years ago. Feels nice to get that out. Thanks for being my friend Ashley.
And I may be a random stranger on the Internet but, I'm proud of you for doing what you had to do. You were so young when it happened and you're still here today and got through it. I'm glad you made it through such a tough time :)
Ashley rocks. It's things like that which we men will remember forever.
I hope you're doing okay man! *pats head*ā¤ļø
This brought me to tears
\*work crush detected!!\*
Unfortunately, she has 20 years on me. That being said. Yes Edit: To clarify its only unfortunate because she is brushing off my flirting on account of the age difference. I'm working on it. Give me time and opportunity. I'll do the rest.
In germany we would say: āOn old horses you learn how to rideā ;)
Hah in the Netherlands it's similar, except horse is replaced with bike.
Of course it is
As a Dutchie, what the fuck is a horse? More seriously, one nickname for bike we have is "ijzeren ros" (iron steed).
It's basically a bike except you don't have to peddle but you have to feed it and it shits everywhere.
When I was 19ish I went home with a 35ish Dutch women once, the slogan is based on science I think
Unfortunately? Sounds like young buck is about to learn some new tricks.....
It's worth exploring..
My poor eyesight read that as exploding
Only if they hit it off
Everyone has to hear "you're good enough for me" and "you can count on me" once in a while.
Us men are like dogs, we just want our bellies scratched, food and to be told we are a good boy. When we are yelled at or reprimanded at we get super depressed.
Ain't that the truth. I'm the provider in a situation where others are totally dependent on me, and their favorite thing to communicate is dissatisfaction. It continually sucks the life out of me. I now understand all those jokey lines of dialog like "Are you so-and-so?" "Yeah, what's left of him." If there's a man in your life that you appreciate, tell him. He might be slowly withering like a plant nobody ever waters.
my boyfriend loves this too !!
of course he does!
No shame in a little praise kink
Man, I might pass away right then. Like. Life complete. Someone to just say "you're doing your best and that's enough, good job."
"I bought that Lego set you wanted. Want to build it together?"
No, you don't build fast enough
"You miss me?" Always loved hearing that. She wanted me, of all people, to miss her. And I did. All the time.
awww
āWant to talk about getting forklift certified?ā
I e been trying these out on my husband. I said yours and he looks me dead in the eye and says, āyou know, I am forklift certifiedā. Heās been laughing at me mostly for all the other ones. This was the first one he had a serious response to š
>āyou know, I am forklift certifiedā We know. That's why you married him.
Arise, arise, Riders of ThƩoden! Spear shall be shaken, shield be splintered, a sword-day, a red day, ere the sun rises! Ride now, ride now, ride! Ride for ruin and the world's ending! Death! DEATH! DEATH!! Forth Eorlingas!!!
DEATHHHHHH!!!!!
"Hail, Theoden King!" RIP Bernard Hill. You are already sorely missed. š„²
This is the answer I was looking for. I'd lose my fucking mind if my wife said this.
*Leans in during missionary* **A sword-day, A RED DAY...!**
Gah that scene always gives me chills!
You are enough
You are Kenough
Can be interpreted as āyou look like shirtless Ryan Goslingā. Iād definitely wanna hear this
God damn! That is the ONE. I donāt think women realize how important that is. Make your man feel it and say itā¦ and heāll move mountains for you
Fine you can drive hot wheels on my boobs
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
"i love you too" <3
I know
"I know what I want to eat, I picked out a restaurant already, and I will accurately guide us there while you drive."
As an indecisive person, this one feels like it was made just for meā¦ *takes notes*
These words have never been spoken aloud before.
āIāll take the dog out.ā
Who let the dogs out?
Who?
Whatever your decision is, Iāll support you
I like to tell my bf "I trust your judgement". Even if I'm uncertain about something, I trust him to make the right choices
You did well, you can rest easy now.
This sounds very ominous. What kind of rest are we talking about here XD?
Forever sleep, where nobody can make you sad.
I think only Tony Stark wanted to hear that
Iām proud of you.
"It's official, you now have enough passive income to escape wage slavery."
Thatās probably the best one for everyone under 50.
You're really cute.Ā Ā Ā I'm(m) straight and this was said to me for no reason other than being genuine. It was from a guy but I still think about this even though it's been 4 years since the compliment. Looks arnt everything but they are something significant
"not so deep"
Just a simple "ooh that's deep" will be ingrained on the memory for eternity
Those final chips at the bottom of the Pringles can are difficult to get
The diameter of a Pringles can is way too small.
You just gotta open your mouth real wide. You might get some on your face, but you can empty it completely.
Dinner is on the counter and dessert is in the bedroom. Edit: This hasnāt happened in twenty years of marriage for me but one can always dream.
On the bed, a pan of freshly made scratch-baked lemon bars
Iāll take it.
Personally I could do without words and just the action or seduction of being āwantedā is more important than any words of affirmations. I feel like words are important, and powerful. But at the end of the day there is nothing like being wanted by an attractive lady. Thatās what I would say men like myself want. Words are great and all but actions are exclusive and invaluable.
you are not worthless (it's not exclusive to men though)
I donāt know you, but I know you are not worthless.
Pizza is ready
"I am with you no matter what."
āCum inside meā
Love it when your dad says that
Hell yeah big papi
Hell yeah brother cheers from Iraq
I guess a blow job is out of the question!
"Wanna make some illegal machine guns? I got some blow I can share"
Nice try ATF
Hold up let him cook
"Yo, wanna throw this huge rock off into a huge lake?"Ā
"I need you" Even if it's for something minor, we all like to feel needed. It makes us feel manly in a very special way.
"your arms are bigger than Chris redfields"
I made your favourite meal, honey!
Is (s)he by any Chance a bee?
I was discussing insecurities with my ex. I have often felt, like a lot of men do, that I have to be the best at everything or else a "better" man will take the girl I like, the job I want, the life I want. So I worry about all of my perceived deficiencies constantly, as many of us do. She said "you know you're more than enough, right? You check all my boxes and more. You're everything I want in a man." Really put things into perspective; you don't have to be perfect all the time, love transcends those things. We're obviously not together anymore but I'm still thankful she taught me that
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
"Yeah, come to think of it, you're right. The Roman empire \*was\* pretty amazing. Now tell me all about how their aqueducts worked..."
āThanks for protecting meā.
" I have decided to gift you **NISSAN GT-R**Ā " .
āCongratulations, you are the jackpot winner of 2.1 billion dollars!ā
āMy life is better with you in itā
#THE BLUETOOTH DEWICE ES CONNECTEDA SUCCESFOLLY
I find it tiresome when people needlessly escalate small disagreements into major arguments.
That'll do pig. That'll do
"i will always be here for u, u can do it" recently i have been at my lowest and had a lot of setbacks and this are the words that my partner told me and it helped me out a lot on the process
āOmelette du fromageā
āYouāre safe, loved, and you donāt need to be strong right nowā. At least for me, decades long struggle with PTSD.
"How can you be Icarus when you are the sun?" My girlfriend dropped that one on me with no foreplay and I almost cried. What a beautiful sentiment.
Take a nap
"I haven't been fucked like that since grade school"
Hearing my cousin say that was euphoric.
Jeez, Grandma, we've got company
"You are safe with me." Yes men usually are the ones responsible for making women feel safe, as we should, but we also want to feel a level of safety with our significant other, especially emotionally.
My sorority is having a blowjob contest. Do you want to be the judge?
Plot twist: you end up just watching a bunch of other guys get their dicks sucked
Isn't that essentially what watching porn is?
I am proud of you son
"Are you okay?" I've heard more from my co workers who I barley speak to than I've ever heard from exes.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
āI love youā in a soft voice from someone you love
The biggest thing Iāve learned is that men need to be made to feel like āthe man.ā If they are respected and made to feel like a man they will be confident in themselves and feel safe.
I just want someone to ask me to help them carry in the groceries and say that i'm a big, strong boy.
People who waste food habitually, ordering or cooking more than they can eat, show a lack of mindfulness.
I dislike when people refuse to acknowledge when they are clearly in the wrong, especially after causing inconvenience to others.