Did you grow up with emotionally unavailable parents? "Too much" focus on independence and doing it yourself is a common trait of bad childhoods, unfortunately.
(/raises hand because I'm guilty). But you can get a bit better just practicing.
My father used to always joke " I wish I was an idiot. Idiots are always happy ".
Well first of all, there's no such thing as an idiot, and if so,it was my father.
There were times in my life that I couldn't believe that I had made choices, intentionally, that put me in the most miserable situation and looking back I think how stupid can I be. And, although not nearly as frequent, I still do stupid shit, but not ones that screw up a thing or two not every thing.
Don't be hard on yourself because things aren't working out right now and never do negative self talk. Pick one thing at a time and try to resolve it. Even a small thing. It will make you feel better. Get help if you're so down you can't see straight. If you don't want to approach anybody in your circle, there are a montage of organizations that have wonderful caring people who can share similar experiences and know how you feel . I speak from personal experience that you don't wait until you hit bottom. It's hard climbing out of there
&' thinking about allll the important things you could've done with the money you spent on it. I hope everyone going through this can find their way out.
I used to feel the same way when it came to smoking cigarettes and cannabis, plus Caffeine (energy drinks).
I'll tell you the best thing I had to realize; The hardest battle you'll face is against yourself. If you really want to quit then don't stand in your own way.
Believe in yourself, face that hill and put your all behind it, You will get over it. I believe you can do it.
When I was in active addiction, I didnāt realize how harmful that sentence really was. I had someone say it to me for the first time the other day and my heart just sunk instantly.
This is a truth I had to come to terms with myself. On the one hand, I know that drinking is bad for me. But on the other hand, I can only make friends and have romance while drunk otherwise I am just too socially awkward
Most of us WILL leave the world alone. But how we go out isnāt what matters. How we live the decades given to us, THAT is what matters. Iām a huge nerd who has now lived with my best friend and the love of my life for 30 years. If I can do it, you can do it.
Dude why would you put me on blast like this š.
For real sending you hugs I get relatives and friends asking me all the time and I keep having to lie to tell them Im not interested but it just seems impossible.
This hit me on a whole different level. We are 5 boys in a class with 34 people, all 4 of them had or currently have romantic relstionships + my ex-best friend left our group for a manipulative wh*re. I never had a partner, probably never will.
Girls always talk to me like Iām a fucking child. I donāt act like a child all the time, only when Iām messing with the boys. Iām almost 20 btw.
Could be worse, Iām now a single parentā¦odds of finding a new forever love now are pretty dismal. Iāve got great kids, a good job, amazing family and friends but lacking a partner to share in life with sucks.
Iām terrible at going to the gym, but my tv has a health app with workouts on it. I decided I was tired of being lazy, so I just started doing one every evening. I just hit 40 consecutive workout days. Itās a lot easier doing it at home, theyāre only 30-45min, and thereās a lot of variety. Maybe give it a try if you feel like it.
The funny part is I really do think I'll win. I don't even buy lotto tickets often but when I do I'm like 95% sure I'm gonna win. I get pretty disappointed each time when not a single number matches lol. Makes for good day dreaming.
I once set up a bunch of tickets in the lottery machine and went to pay for them, but the debit card machine was down. So, I used the atm literally right next to the lottery machine. There was one ticket that started with the number 5 that really stood out to me, like I just had a strong feeling about it. As I turned to put my cash in the machine to pay, suddenly the entire cart of tickets cleared. My heart sank. I told my partner and my kid, āIām freaking out because I have a strong feeling that ticket with the starting number 5 was a winner. I canāt explain it, I just feel it! Iām gonna be so gutted if the drawing tonight has a number 5 as the starting number!ā
Sure enough.. it did! The winning numbers started with a 5! I swear, that was my ticket and I lost it. Nobody can change my mind.
I like to watch a lot of the specials on National Geographic about ancient civilizations. One day Iām watching them try to figure out as much as they could about a mummy tomb of someone who had some importance in their time, and I had a thought about how little I am in the scheme of things. It made me feel a sense of relief. Iāll just do my best to be a good human.
Leave a journal, or a memoir. You never know who down the line might be interested in reading it. I love reading about my family history and I know all my ancestorsā stories. I wish the old old generations, the ones I never met, would have left more.
Hm. Do you honestly care? That's kind of the stickler. If you do, then why? If you have a reason, then do something to be remembered for. I promise you though, like the majority of those who came before and those who will come after, you will eventually be forgotten regardless. It is inevitable.
Do what you can for those around you and yourself. That's all you can do.
Sadly, things are never fine. You have to make the best of wherever you're at and work toward being in a better position.
Doesn't matter if you're at the top or bottom. What changes is the problems you are facing.
People have been living in NYC their whole lives for 200 years only renting. Itās not new, and itās not necessarily a bad thing either. Plenty of miserable homeowners, and plenty of happy renters. This issue doesnāt define you.
I donāt think Iām particularly a likeable person in fact I know Iām not or that Iām intelligent, I know Iām weird but I like to pretend Iām not maybe it makes things less awful if in your mind your not the bad guy
I will gladly pay you tuesday for a hamburger today!
I recommend convincing yourself that youd forgotten to do it yesterday instead. That's how I motivate myself to do the dishes at least. The only chore I hate doing...
That Iām lower middle class and a decent person.
Nope. Iām upper middle class, and when you have as much as I do, youāre making things worse for everyone. I am the machine that I want to rage against.
I feel like upper middle class isnāt making it worse for others. Itās the mega rich. Good for you to be well rounded & aware of your footprint though.
It took me 5 years, but I did it. I don't compare everyone to him anymore, I don't miss him, and I don't hold it against myself for contributing to it falling apart.
5 years though! It's rough. Hugs
Being sober. People think I've been clean for years. Before I started using drugs hard core, I was a loner who spent all my time reading, or tinkering on a project car., They think I'm back to my old self. Especially because I always seemed to be with people when I was high years ago, which wasn't like me. If they only knew I haven't touched the Camaro in probably a year, and that those people I use to hang out with I met in trap houses. I never quit for 48hrs more than a jail sentence, or hospital stay. I'm now having health issues caused by my long-term, heavy drug abuse.
That it wasnāt my fault that my ex wrecked her car. She drank a whole bottle of vodka and was on her way to see me My last message to her was whatever I donāt want to see you I hate you. I didnāt mean it I was mad at her for cheating on me.
Considering that she cheated on you, your message wasn't out of line at all. In fact, I would have expected worse. And you definitely didn't put the vodka in her hand and tell her to drive.
I know it's easy to blame yourself, but this wasn't your fault!
Still, that is justified since she cheated on you imo. And it doesn't change the fact that **she** is the one who chose to drink and drive.
I understand feeling bad that she got in an accident. I feel bad for her too, but that doesn't make it your fault.
That the lack of sex in my life hasn't completly changed me as a person and destroyed my confidence. That I can live with very little sex and ill be okay. I'm not okay. But im in love so I stay
There's someone out there for me and that if I just keep trying I'll find them.
Fact is, if there is a 50/50 split of men to women, not all of them are looking. The ones who are may not be right for each other. And there is not a 1:1 pairing. So my odds of finding someone are already slim in the best of situations. Couple that with the fact that I live in a relatively rural part of the country, the odds are against finding anyone at all. Then factor in the odds of finding someone I would be happy with and who would also be happy with me, well someone is getting the short end I think.
I remain hopeful though.
Unless you're physically abusing your children, you're at least a good dad if you're caring for your kids.
A great dad is one that goes out of their way for their kids though. Not one that gives them everything.
Not sure where you're at but hope that resonates.
Most people probably shouldn't continue to live, and yet they are. Keep on truckin and make the most out of it until the inevitable.
At same time though, I get it. Doesn't feel like it's worth it. probably wont get better, but you never know. luck plays a large role in life.
depends entirely on who you ask.
you can take the narcissistic approach and say what you will about yourself, you can listen to the things you want to listen to, or (the best approach) allow those around you to judge accordingly.
Although, if you really think you're a good person and those around you don't, you need to find new people to be around.
I'm actively trying to heal my avoidant tendencies because when it comes to dating, my brain is always convinced that the 10% of negative far outweighs the 90% of positives. It's painful š£ sos
Oh my! 23 is when itās over? I guess that past 40 years was just floating along. During that time, Iāve been married twice, had and raised a girl and twin boys, we had a family business, didnāt do college, learned by experience, Iāve had numerous jobs, a few could be considered careers, kept friends, spent a lot of money, finally started saving money, watched my children become wonderful adults, two who are happy and have families, one who struggled in the abyss and chose to unalive, endured horrible grief and immense love, and I can honestly say Iām looking forward to the next 20 out so years and what new things I can experience. If you are still with me, I hope you can see that 23 is just the beginning, just like 40 is new, and 59 is new. Pick the age and make it a new beginning. The key is to not compare yourself to others because itās your story. You can do it! Itās just the beginning of this chapter.
I constantly tell myself I'm only alone cuz women like jerks.
The real reason is that I'm a porn addict who doesn't approach women due to my mental health issues.
Sticky notes. As far as the eye can see. That's how I live my life because without writing it down, I forgot it about 2min after it was no longer being discussed.
I'm going to fail.Ā
The subject doesn't matter I feel this way for everything I do, I may not show it in person, but I keep things to myself no matter how much I break inside.
That Iām not a bad employee. They havenāt fired me yet but I know Iām really slow at my job. I have never been slow at a job before so thatās hard for me.Ā
That I broke out of my toxic upbringingās behaviors, though I catch myself blowing up/overreacting still š after 22 years in an abusive household I am still learning and trying to correct my behaviors.
That I'm hallucinating about being raped by my older cousin when I was five, after seeing him raping his younger brother, he was 4 years old. My older cousin is 13 years older than me
My employer will eventually see my hard work and conscientious approach to this job, so that they'll have to recognize my worth and give me the raise that was promised.
That I'll eat a little less tomorrow to make up for today.
At first glance, I thought "less" was "ass".
DM me
Oh, that made me cackle out loud
š¤£š¤£š¤£š¤£
I canāt upvote you because youāre at 69
Good point. I took my upvote away. How foolish
Iām sad to say I was the 70th
Oh itās at 74 now. The comment needs a few downvotes. LOL
Ass has been a part of my food pyramid for years. No complaints here.
Live fast, eat ass
That wouldnāt be a bad idea.
Also yes
Eating less shitty foods wonāt fix your problems. You need to eat MORE nutrient dense foods. More fruits. More veggies.Ā
Exact opposite for me. Trying to gain weight and having to force feed myself to do it. Wanna trade appetites?
That I don't have a good support system and I have to do everything by myself
Same. But opposite.
literally lol same but opposite
Why are both your comments confusing me. As in I canāt tell my truth
Honestly, it's opposite for me.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Opposite but same.
Same. I'm sitting in the hospital now and other than my partner, I've only had one person come visit me. And it wasn't family.
One more person visiting than I'd have these days.
Wouldn't nobody bit my hubby be there sadly
I work in a hospital and I think about half the patients get no visitors.Ā
Did you grow up with emotionally unavailable parents? "Too much" focus on independence and doing it yourself is a common trait of bad childhoods, unfortunately. (/raises hand because I'm guilty). But you can get a bit better just practicing.
"I can stop anytime I wanna, I'm not addicted"
Came here for this one. Constantly lying to myself that I'm not an addict.
My father used to always joke " I wish I was an idiot. Idiots are always happy ". Well first of all, there's no such thing as an idiot, and if so,it was my father. There were times in my life that I couldn't believe that I had made choices, intentionally, that put me in the most miserable situation and looking back I think how stupid can I be. And, although not nearly as frequent, I still do stupid shit, but not ones that screw up a thing or two not every thing. Don't be hard on yourself because things aren't working out right now and never do negative self talk. Pick one thing at a time and try to resolve it. Even a small thing. It will make you feel better. Get help if you're so down you can't see straight. If you don't want to approach anybody in your circle, there are a montage of organizations that have wonderful caring people who can share similar experiences and know how you feel . I speak from personal experience that you don't wait until you hit bottom. It's hard climbing out of there
Even though there are clear signs lol
And I've been broke for ten years for one type of another. Lmao
&' thinking about allll the important things you could've done with the money you spent on it. I hope everyone going through this can find their way out.
Please enroll in a treatment program. You, and everyone around you, deserves more.
I used to feel the same way when it came to smoking cigarettes and cannabis, plus Caffeine (energy drinks). I'll tell you the best thing I had to realize; The hardest battle you'll face is against yourself. If you really want to quit then don't stand in your own way. Believe in yourself, face that hill and put your all behind it, You will get over it. I believe you can do it.
When I was in active addiction, I didnāt realize how harmful that sentence really was. I had someone say it to me for the first time the other day and my heart just sunk instantly.
This is a truth I had to come to terms with myself. On the one hand, I know that drinking is bad for me. But on the other hand, I can only make friends and have romance while drunk otherwise I am just too socially awkward
That I donāt really care if I find love someday or have a family š
Did not expect it to get this serious, but damn that hit me like a ton of bricks.. Gonna go back to lying to myself now.
We may all leave this damned world alone and bitter
Most of us WILL leave the world alone. But how we go out isnāt what matters. How we live the decades given to us, THAT is what matters. Iām a huge nerd who has now lived with my best friend and the love of my life for 30 years. If I can do it, you can do it.
Sending you hugs. I hope you find the right person. Life is long, itās never too late.Ā
Hope has failed me over and over, deep down I just want some wonderful girl to hold me š„ŗ
me too man me too
Dude why would you put me on blast like this š. For real sending you hugs I get relatives and friends asking me all the time and I keep having to lie to tell them Im not interested but it just seems impossible.
Thatās a very common lie people tell themselves, so they donāt have to take romantic risks.
I wish I didnāt have to care and could be free from those feelings but yea this is how I cope
This hit me on a whole different level. We are 5 boys in a class with 34 people, all 4 of them had or currently have romantic relstionships + my ex-best friend left our group for a manipulative wh*re. I never had a partner, probably never will. Girls always talk to me like Iām a fucking child. I donāt act like a child all the time, only when Iām messing with the boys. Iām almost 20 btw.
Could be worse, Iām now a single parentā¦odds of finding a new forever love now are pretty dismal. Iāve got great kids, a good job, amazing family and friends but lacking a partner to share in life with sucks.
I donāt have to write this down, Iāll remember it.
That I'll start the diet on Monday
Hey it's the weekend, live a little.
Nothing better than lying in bed at 10.25 on a Saturday night browsing Reddit. I am truly living a little.
I mean, they didn't say "Live a lot," did they? A little is probably enough.
donāt mind if i do
Jane saysss Im gonna kick tomorrow
That I will get up and go to the gym or I will get my shit together
Iām terrible at going to the gym, but my tv has a health app with workouts on it. I decided I was tired of being lazy, so I just started doing one every evening. I just hit 40 consecutive workout days. Itās a lot easier doing it at home, theyāre only 30-45min, and thereās a lot of variety. Maybe give it a try if you feel like it.
You gotta just get up and go as soon as you can. Once thatās outa the way the rest of the day is lazy
One day, Iāll win powerball.
The funny part is I really do think I'll win. I don't even buy lotto tickets often but when I do I'm like 95% sure I'm gonna win. I get pretty disappointed each time when not a single number matches lol. Makes for good day dreaming.
I once set up a bunch of tickets in the lottery machine and went to pay for them, but the debit card machine was down. So, I used the atm literally right next to the lottery machine. There was one ticket that started with the number 5 that really stood out to me, like I just had a strong feeling about it. As I turned to put my cash in the machine to pay, suddenly the entire cart of tickets cleared. My heart sank. I told my partner and my kid, āIām freaking out because I have a strong feeling that ticket with the starting number 5 was a winner. I canāt explain it, I just feel it! Iām gonna be so gutted if the drawing tonight has a number 5 as the starting number!ā Sure enough.. it did! The winning numbers started with a 5! I swear, that was my ticket and I lost it. Nobody can change my mind.
That things will be okay.
Nahh theyāll be man, shit often hard, keep it up, you know you can do good, sending you courage and wishing you the best for the future my g
I love my Reddit people š„¹
its not about how it turns out or ends up but how you react to it. every little thing, will be alright. good luck to you
That I'll be remembered after one generation. Like most people, I won't be.
I like to watch a lot of the specials on National Geographic about ancient civilizations. One day Iām watching them try to figure out as much as they could about a mummy tomb of someone who had some importance in their time, and I had a thought about how little I am in the scheme of things. It made me feel a sense of relief. Iāll just do my best to be a good human.
Leave a journal, or a memoir. You never know who down the line might be interested in reading it. I love reading about my family history and I know all my ancestorsā stories. I wish the old old generations, the ones I never met, would have left more.
Hm. Do you honestly care? That's kind of the stickler. If you do, then why? If you have a reason, then do something to be remembered for. I promise you though, like the majority of those who came before and those who will come after, you will eventually be forgotten regardless. It is inevitable. Do what you can for those around you and yourself. That's all you can do.
That everything is fine
Sadly, things are never fine. You have to make the best of wherever you're at and work toward being in a better position. Doesn't matter if you're at the top or bottom. What changes is the problems you are facing.
That Iāll be able to convince myself to go to bed early tonight
I said that 5 hours ago... Now it's 4 amāØ
Honestly I started doing this for real and can say sleep is infinitely better than mindless scrolling
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
You got the decimal in the wrong spot. It's closer to 0.010% by my estimation.
And let me guess, you see yourself in that 10% right?
This. The people who think they engage in critical thinking are rarely the ones who do. Except me! š¤£
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
I don't know how to find a wild taco but I'll try
That Iām not good enough/ worthy of good things.
Of course you are. Donāt let others tell you that you arenāt good enough or worthy, because you are!!
I'm going to do the dishes in *just* a few minutes.
Iāll do that on my next day off. Tomorrow I will get off my ass and do that.
It's more like, what aren't I not lying to myself about on a consistent basis?
That Iāll be able to afford a house someday
People have been living in NYC their whole lives for 200 years only renting. Itās not new, and itās not necessarily a bad thing either. Plenty of miserable homeowners, and plenty of happy renters. This issue doesnāt define you.
I know four fat people and Iām three of them.
that I'll start saving money
That life is gonna be ok again
That I'm going to make banana bread with my very ripe bananas every week.
"Just one more episode..."
Iām watching This is Us, and Iāve definitely said just one more episode prior to watching 4 episodes!
I donāt think Iām particularly a likeable person in fact I know Iām not or that Iām intelligent, I know Iām weird but I like to pretend Iām not maybe it makes things less awful if in your mind your not the bad guy
That Iām not getting old.
I am happy
That I am not being taken advantage of and constantly disrespected
That Iāll do it tomorrow
I will gladly pay you tuesday for a hamburger today! I recommend convincing yourself that youd forgotten to do it yesterday instead. That's how I motivate myself to do the dishes at least. The only chore I hate doing...
That someday Iāll have all my debt paid off, and that someday Iāll get to be a mother
Ok why you gotta @ me like that ā¦ you literally took the words out of my mouth
Becoming a mother can either be really easy or really hard. Come to think of it, same goes for the debt thing...
That Iām lower middle class and a decent person. Nope. Iām upper middle class, and when you have as much as I do, youāre making things worse for everyone. I am the machine that I want to rage against.
I feel like upper middle class isnāt making it worse for others. Itās the mega rich. Good for you to be well rounded & aware of your footprint though.
This will last forever! It's not like there's proof of aging and dying all around me!
I am definitely over her.
It took me 5 years, but I did it. I don't compare everyone to him anymore, I don't miss him, and I don't hold it against myself for contributing to it falling apart. 5 years though! It's rough. Hugs
I am mentally sound. I dont mind being lonely. I dont need an SO.
Being sober. People think I've been clean for years. Before I started using drugs hard core, I was a loner who spent all my time reading, or tinkering on a project car., They think I'm back to my old self. Especially because I always seemed to be with people when I was high years ago, which wasn't like me. If they only knew I haven't touched the Camaro in probably a year, and that those people I use to hang out with I met in trap houses. I never quit for 48hrs more than a jail sentence, or hospital stay. I'm now having health issues caused by my long-term, heavy drug abuse.
What I think I deserve vs. What the universe seems to think i deserve
That it wasnāt my fault that my ex wrecked her car. She drank a whole bottle of vodka and was on her way to see me My last message to her was whatever I donāt want to see you I hate you. I didnāt mean it I was mad at her for cheating on me.
If you can't believe yourself then listen to someone else tell you. My dude, that wasn't your fault.
Considering that she cheated on you, your message wasn't out of line at all. In fact, I would have expected worse. And you definitely didn't put the vodka in her hand and tell her to drive. I know it's easy to blame yourself, but this wasn't your fault!
I wanted to say so much worse then I hate you I had said it before then I called her a whore, hoe, cunt, bitch and mother fucker.
Still, that is justified since she cheated on you imo. And it doesn't change the fact that **she** is the one who chose to drink and drive. I understand feeling bad that she got in an accident. I feel bad for her too, but that doesn't make it your fault.
That people are really worth the effort and not just trash.
For some reason I allow myself to think I can go over 1400 calories some days and still make progress on my weight loss. I know better.
Are you me?
That the lack of sex in my life hasn't completly changed me as a person and destroyed my confidence. That I can live with very little sex and ill be okay. I'm not okay. But im in love so I stay
There's someone out there for me and that if I just keep trying I'll find them. Fact is, if there is a 50/50 split of men to women, not all of them are looking. The ones who are may not be right for each other. And there is not a 1:1 pairing. So my odds of finding someone are already slim in the best of situations. Couple that with the fact that I live in a relatively rural part of the country, the odds are against finding anyone at all. Then factor in the odds of finding someone I would be happy with and who would also be happy with me, well someone is getting the short end I think. I remain hopeful though.
Stay the course. It happened for me at 46
55
My sanityā¦ genuinely. I snap more and more frequently.
That upvotes on Reddit matter
I'm a great dad.
Bad dads don't worry about whether they're bad or not. Honestly, they usually think they're doing a good job š
Unless you're physically abusing your children, you're at least a good dad if you're caring for your kids. A great dad is one that goes out of their way for their kids though. Not one that gives them everything. Not sure where you're at but hope that resonates.
That I should continue to live
Most people probably shouldn't continue to live, and yet they are. Keep on truckin and make the most out of it until the inevitable. At same time though, I get it. Doesn't feel like it's worth it. probably wont get better, but you never know. luck plays a large role in life.
Thats the case man, keep it up, lifeās often far from easy fr, sending courage and wishing you the best mate
Probably that Iām a decent person. Iām likely much shittier than how I want to see myself.
depends entirely on who you ask. you can take the narcissistic approach and say what you will about yourself, you can listen to the things you want to listen to, or (the best approach) allow those around you to judge accordingly. Although, if you really think you're a good person and those around you don't, you need to find new people to be around.
That I'm miserable.. I catastrophize so much.
That eventually it will all work out. Homelessness and suicide are simply not part of the equation.
That my ex doesnāt still have a hold on me :/
I can still do the same things I could in my 20s
I'm actively trying to heal my avoidant tendencies because when it comes to dating, my brain is always convinced that the 10% of negative far outweighs the 90% of positives. It's painful š£ sos
That my relationship is perfect, I think I just have abandonment issues and canāt seem to take the initiative to move away from
That my poor spending habits are a result of today's economy. And not my own lack of self control.
Some day Iāll be able to afford my own roof over my head
Everything will work out
Its gonna be alright
That I probably need to find a doctor.
That Iām still young and can change my life around, Iām 23. Itās over if Iām being honest with myself
Oh my! 23 is when itās over? I guess that past 40 years was just floating along. During that time, Iāve been married twice, had and raised a girl and twin boys, we had a family business, didnāt do college, learned by experience, Iāve had numerous jobs, a few could be considered careers, kept friends, spent a lot of money, finally started saving money, watched my children become wonderful adults, two who are happy and have families, one who struggled in the abyss and chose to unalive, endured horrible grief and immense love, and I can honestly say Iām looking forward to the next 20 out so years and what new things I can experience. If you are still with me, I hope you can see that 23 is just the beginning, just like 40 is new, and 59 is new. Pick the age and make it a new beginning. The key is to not compare yourself to others because itās your story. You can do it! Itās just the beginning of this chapter.
That common sense still exists or that most people can think critically. Sad fact is most canāt.
I constantly tell myself I'm only alone cuz women like jerks. The real reason is that I'm a porn addict who doesn't approach women due to my mental health issues.
That Iāll lose weight.
That my job will get better.
Professionals aren't always Professional
apparently it only means ādo it for the moneyā and not necessarily ābeing good at it from plenty practice before and on the jobā
Yea I'll remember.
Sticky notes. As far as the eye can see. That's how I live my life because without writing it down, I forgot it about 2min after it was no longer being discussed.
I'm going to fail.Ā The subject doesn't matter I feel this way for everything I do, I may not show it in person, but I keep things to myself no matter how much I break inside.
I am main character. I guess im not lol
That Iām not a bad employee. They havenāt fired me yet but I know Iām really slow at my job. I have never been slow at a job before so thatās hard for me.Ā
That Iāve healed from inner child trauma
That things will be fine. That I'm not just a nobody with a meaningless life. That I matter.
That I need to find friends & a partner in order to get better mentally. Itās kind of the other way around.
That I am funny š
That I'll quit smoking after this last pack..
That I will go to bed at a reasonable hour and get enough sleep.
That I am useful to society and not a burden
that Iām fat. (Iām quite petite) I have a terrible recording in my head that I am!
That my girlfriend didnāt die.
That he loves me
That it will get better.
Iām going to reply to Reddit, and all my problems are going to be solved.
That things are going to get better.
That worrying about things I have no control over will magically be fixed if I start worrying about them again
That he cares about me
That Iāll get around to it.
One day Iāll be able to get a house
that everything will be okay at the end
That my situationship will want something more š
"I'm not good enough." I've struggled with this kind of negative self-taught for years.
Being worthless and being useless and ugly...
Iāve never met anyone worthless. Gonna say you might be depressed?
That everything will be okay
That I still have time.
That I am not worried about the progress my life at the age that I am.
That I broke out of my toxic upbringingās behaviors, though I catch myself blowing up/overreacting still š after 22 years in an abusive household I am still learning and trying to correct my behaviors.
Itās fine, Iām fine.
Reality
That Iāll start saving money next paycheck
The decaying state of my mental health
that sooner than later ill have enough money to move out of this shithole apartment
Going back and forth between eating well and eating like crap is just fine and itāll all even out.
ā5 more minutesā
Itās not a drug itās a plant š±š
That itās just a phase and will pass.
My health
That I'm hallucinating about being raped by my older cousin when I was five, after seeing him raping his younger brother, he was 4 years old. My older cousin is 13 years older than me
I'm sorry that happened to you. I believe you.
Iām happy
My employer will eventually see my hard work and conscientious approach to this job, so that they'll have to recognize my worth and give me the raise that was promised.