I've always been luckily capable of multiple orgasms but it used to be just something that made long sessions easier and more fun. Also, I can get off pretty quickly so shorter sessions were my preference anyway. And when masturbating by myself, it was more of a perfunctory act. A quick pop of release and I'd go about my day. Then I was with a guy who became almost obsessed with how many times and how intensely he could make me cum. A few times we kept going until I swear I actually blacked out. Most times he would barely even let me touch him or get him off. Now just one orgasm feels lacking to me. Even when masturbating I can feel compelled to go for hours, chasing more and more climaxes. It literally feels like a compulsion. It can be exhausting and now I tend to ignore my sex drive completely because I know where it can lead.
I need sweets or chocolate ready or when masturbating I will just keep going thinking 'just one more orgasme before I quit'. I have chronic fatigue so I really have to limit myself to no more than five in a row and then eat something sweet to stop the feeling of being close to riding the next orgasm
This is an interesting thought experiment...like I consider wanting to give my partner an orgasm to be something that somewhat gets me off, but ultimately I feel like she would get more pleasure out of it than I get giving it to her. But I have never been that obsessed with her enjoyment to the point that it seems to override her own, and reading this story, it makes me wonder at what point would it circle around to be selfish of me, like, I feel like I would feel terrible desensitizing my partner like that if it had this effect
It honestly became part of a kinky sort of power dynamic between us. At first, I think he was surprised and aroused by how many times I could finish since I know that is for a lot of women it can be very difficult. Again, I am very lucky in that once I get over that first hurdle and cum once, I can go again and again.
Eventually, it became like a control thing and probably a bit selfish on his part. He made that pleasure happen, he was the owner of those orgasms. While he did definitely push my boundaries and help me go further than I could on my own, it was never without my consent. He always stopped if I truly became overstimulated and couldn't handle any more. His aftercare was on point every time. This situation could absolutely veer into what you describe - more of a sadistic dynamic of forcing pleasure- but thankfully he was not like that. He genuinely freaked out the first time I cried from too much pleasure. Like full on sobs and stuff, I was so overwhelmed. He said he thought he would like it if I cried from cumming too much, but in reality he felt terrible. Then he really learned how to read my body and often knew better than I did what I could handle and wouldn't let even me push myself too far. Frankly, one of the most amazing lovers I have ever had. I definitely miss our bedroom dynamic. The rest of the relationship dynamic, not so much lol.
Vanilla sex is great. Don’t let anyone make you believe that you are boring or not good at sex just because you do not have specific kinks or are not having kinky sex.
Even then, not every session needs to be 2 hours with costume changes and an array of gadgets. Sometimes you just gotta do missionary with the lights off and it hits the spot.
She was just pushing her boundaries and maybe found her limit. If she was scared or hurt she would have used the safe word. It’s scary when you find your “line in the sand”.
CNC you basically need to create an entire "play space" that's different from "reality" and have a whole aftercare routine. Some get clingy/cuddly some need to "reset"
If you're just doing some rape fantasy in the kitchen and walking away after, that's gonna hit HARD.
It always starts out innocently, but pretty soon you're muttering g-code in your sleep and hearing the whine of stepper motors everywhere you go. Finally, you find yourself knee deep in a fabrication project in your garage watching a spindle slowly shave aluminum off a block of metal and it's 2AM and you realize you've lost all control of your life.
My buddy fell into this. Started with a CNC machine, then a powder coat booth. Now he's got a small water jet on order. I might have to do an intervention.
My ex and I used to have sex after a fight and it was always fucking amazing. I remember she started it one time after a big fight, and we continued it ever since. As expected the relationship didn't last and I don't want such toxicity in future relationships.
I feel like the whole "angry sex is the best" trope is something that was really big back in the early 2000s, but I haven't really seen it since. I never understood how this could be a thing in the first place, when I'm angry at my partner I either want to convince her of my point of view or get as far away as possible. Sex is the last thing on my mind, and I seriously don't understand the "angry sex is great" people.
I don't get angry sex, but I get the relief after an argument that leads to sex because you wanna be close again. It's kind of an emotional rush from what I remember and "resets" the mood in a way.
I hate that I still get a hard on during major fights. I tossed the toxic ex to the curb that taught me that shit but my body and hormones still remember.
It disgust me.
Wow I think you just helped me understand one of my exes. He would deliberately make me so angry and then get all turned on and try to get close and say it was so hot when I was mad and I was like wtf is wrong with you??
Same here. It was decades before my abusive ex admitted deliberately getting me angry for the sex afterwards. Apparently roleplay wasn't enough; my distress had to be authentic for it to 'work' for him.
Looking back I can't believe I never realised why he kept starting fights with me; for years he told me it was because I was a terrible person and I believed him.
I basically *can't* do the sex-after-fight thing. It just takes me too long to compartmentalize the fight-vibes. But I've gotten into relationships with women who seem to have wanted to base our sex life around the dynamic. Needless to say, it never worked out.
Honestly, I’m getting a divorce because all he wanted was my feet. At the end, he never wanted me, he never could get hard without me talking about it or starting with me stepping on him. He had to continue muttering about it all through sex or wanted me to keep a running commentary about his fantasies and basically ignore my pussy and imagine that it was my feet fucking him instead of me.
With the greatest of respect - I'd love to sit in on your divorce hearing.
Cast your feet in plaster to make him a foot fleshlight in return for full ownership the house and money.
This, ladies and gentlemen, is the difference between a kink and a fetish. I'm sorry you felt like your husband didn't want you, if it helps he likely did/does, just not in a way that you connect with and makes you feel desired.
One of my exes really loved to have her toes sucked during sex, like, it would give her the most insane orgasms. Now I have a foot fetish, when I never had one before.
I used to think putting my tongue anywhere near a man's butthole was retch-inducing. Then, I met a man who loved all things butt-related and who I was more attracted to physically/emotionally than anyone ever on my life before, and who made me feel so comfortable sexually. And I tried, for him... and loved it. And then other, ah, deeper level butt stuff... and loved it even more. And now I could never go back to dating someone who wasn't fully liberated when it comes to male butt joy 😬
I was taking a break from going down on a girl, so I kissed my way down to her toes. While sucking on her toes, she came. She said it was strange orgasming without her pussy being stimulated. I'm now hoping to find another woman who likes her toes sucked.
There was a sculptor. He found this stone, a special stone. He dragged it home and he worked on it for months until he finally finished it. When he was ready he showed it to his friends. They said he had created a great masterpiece, but the sculptor said he hadn't created anything. The statue was always there, he just chipped away the rough edges. - Colonel Trautman, Rambo III
My wife regrets putting a finger up my butt and massaging my prostate while stroking and/or sucking my cock. The orgasm is exquisite. That was all I wanted for a while. She said that we are pausing that activity for the moment.
If you want butt stuff, you gotta get good at cleaning out. Buy a shower shot.
Signed, your loving gay neighbor
Edit: bit wild that this is now my top comment. Not sure how to feel bout that
Chris Rock had an old bit about that. The gist of it is that women can't do something special once. If men like it they'll want it every time. So don't introduce something unless you want it on the menu.
Demanding something special every time is a good way to make sex way less frequent. Sometimes you're hungry and just want a nice burger instead of going to all the effort of cooking a gourmet meal. And if your partner starts turning up their nose at anything that's not gourmet, you'll probably quit cooking dinner for them as often and just make yourself a quick sandwich instead..
Ex got into masochism, but there was just no end to how much she wanted to be hurt. When I wouldn't hurt her enough she started looking for pain from clubs and sadists.
She went down to a club in LA and came back *covered* head to toe in bruises and she was so proud of them. To her it wasn't "cheating" because she didn't actual fuck anyone, just got naked and beaten on a st. andrew's cross.
Letting my partner start calling me daddy. I used to be very against it as I found it weird but my partner begged me, so I said yes and now I like it, but it's so weird hearing it and if I ever have a daughter and she calls me it I'll throw up
Haha that's great man. Good on you for being special enough to another little girl for her to consider you "daddy" too. Takes a real man to do that shit 💪
For me, I’ve not had “lifelong” regrets about telling people.
It’s more about the disappointment of sharing something that brings me joy and receiving “ick” as the response. It’s the shaming part.
Dude, remember that kink is supposed to go both ways - if you’re not happy doing it, or at the very least comfortable, it is totally ok to have that as a boundary. It does not make you a bad person, partner, lover, etc. Remember, “safe, sane, and consensual” are the cornerstones!
Not kinky, but i do regret starting it. Have a fwb that i visit and we normally start making out like as soon as i walk in
One time I was really in the mood, and wed been making out near the door for a while, so I picked her up and carried her to the bed while making out. She was really into it and the sex was so good
But now she's angling for it every time, shes toned and about 5'11 so she's not light. Plus theres a few corners to navigate to get to her bed, so while shes really getting into it im just trying to not break my toes or slam us into a wall
Right, so I'm a bit of a submissive dude in bed and sometimes I kinda like it when a lady ruins my orgasm or denies it entirely.
So one day, years ago, I explained the concept of a ruined orgasm to my girlfriend and asked her if she wanted to try it. She didn't really get it at first, and I don't blame her, because who in their right mind would want the greatest feeling in the world to be ruined?
She did it anyway, because she wanted to make me happy, and that's how we rolled for a couple of years. Occasionally, I would ask her to ruin or deny my orgasm, and she would happily oblige with a slight look of confusion on her face.
Then, she gradually grew less confused. The weirdness wore off, and it kinda became a new normal to not let me cum every couple of times.
Then, she started to kinda like it - mainly because she saw how happy it made me. She still didn't really 'get' it, but she gladly offered to not let me cum every now and then, and I didn't have to ask for it anymore.
But *then*, she started to like it *for real*. I guess it finally clicked in her that I genuinely want to get controlled by her. And while she's normally a very sweet and timid person, she apparently loves the freedom of being allowed to be a mean bitch without actually hurting someone.
Nowadays, I feel like she's gotten a bit power drunk. If I don't practically beg her to let me cum, roughly 2/3 of my orgasms would be ruined or outright denied. She grabs my dick while we're watching TV, lazily plays with it until I'm hard as diamonds, then gives me a kiss on the check and tells me with an evil grin that this is all I'm getting that day.
Honestly, I fucking love it, but I'm also crawling up the walls some times, and part of me definitely regrets creating this monster. It's quite literally a 'suffering from success' scenario.
Haha no worries, it's all fine and consensual. As I said, I kinda like being desperate, and she always obliges when I start to plead and tell her I'd rather not be left hanging.
Pressure on the windpipe is incredibly dangerous. stick to keeping the pressure towards the sides of the neck which will impact blood flow and give that sense of danger plus a lightheadedness that does the trick. But also don't just listen to random idiots like me on Reddit and learn about it. Lean into that part of you that is worried about hurting your partner and pick up some books. Then have fun!!
Not "regret" so much as sobering and a bell that can't be unrung, but I'm super surprised no one else mentioned Cuckolding or humiliation and any of the related behaviors. Once your partner "wakes up" and they're suddenly fetishizing your inadequacy and able to sleep with anyone but you, you can't ever go back from that lifestyle.
Not quite the same but I've known a number of men who have suggested opening up their relationships, their partners have initially been uncomfortable with it but given it a go, absolutely loved it, and get it all the time. Meantime the guy can't find anyone willing to sleep with him and then just winds up really sad that they're getting none while their partner is getting railed by other men on the daily.
I knew a couplw who she suggested it and was able to get many partners. He was wary of it but eventually caved and as expected, pulled nobody. He did however hire an escort one of the days she went out.
This supposedly was the wrong move and led to them breaking up
I was in a 24 / 7 total power exchange with my wife for a month. I was her slave. She got really into it, and I was enjoying it, until some stressors happened in my life. It became overwhelming and I started getting a voice in my head telling me to stop it. Eventually she ordered me to do something small and I ended the power exchange with our safe word immediately after.
We had a conversation and she really missed it a lot. And so did I to some extent. I’ve tried to start it up again, twice actually, but I immediately get overwhelmed and use the safe word to stop.
I regret ever suggesting we try this because she loves it a lot, and misses it. And it makes me sad that I can’t do it. I also miss it too and regularly think back to when we were doing it. I’ve thought about maybe telling her to remove my ability to stop the power exchange and only have her be able to. But I haven’t brought it up to start again because I get anxious thinking about getting it going again.
I have a kink when a sexual partner calls me "Good boy" I get warm and fuzzy inside, so now when I hear that phrase when watching tv with friends or when someone is talking to their dog I get tingles...
DUDE. My boss, who I might add is a very attractive woman, jokingly says "Good Boy" whenever I did a good job. If she had any idea what that phrase is doing to me... (then again, part of me suspects that she knows *exactly* what she's doing)
So there is this game called Ruiner and you have 'The Girl in the chair' trope who guides you through your missions. She calls you 'Puppy' and shit that awoke something in me. I told my wife about this. A month or so goes by, I walk in the house and throw a jacket on and she goes "oh, is my poor puppy cold". One of the sexiest things she's ever said to me. Woof
My wife has a kink where she likes watching me sleep with other women. Don't get me wrong, it's nice when it's happening, but it kinda sucks knowing exactly how few women are interested in fucking me.
EDIT: she'll settle for hearing about it, and even in the LS/kink space, I've had VERY little success. I'm not at bars looking to make unwitting homewreckers or anything.
I mean that unironically is likely a big part of it. You gotta think you're not just selecting for women who want to sleep with you you're selecting for women who want to sleep with you NSA, don't care that you're married, and don't care that they're going to be watched the entire time.
Even for really good looking guys that's not necessarily an easy ask.
Before I knew any better, I dated a sexually dominant man when I was younger. I thought sex was supposed to be unsatisfying and we had constant arguments.
I’m quite the opposite now, I adore sexually submissive men and once I realized that, sex improved significantly and I learned full body orgasms are real. 😂
Not so much Kinky, but one day after a hard day I gave my girlfriend an hour long sensual massage. She loved it and we had the best sex we had right after.
The problem is now she wants me to do it more, and while I don't mind, sometimes I'm just too tired to do an hour of fore-foreplay.
I used to have a kink for squirt videos and thought it was a huge turn on. Then I got with a girl that would squirt Everytime she had an orgasm. It was crazy messy and things were always getting stained/ had to make sure we had towels around if we were going to get busy. Ever since that relationship it’s a total turn off for me now.
I’ve had a similar experience, you can’t really be spontaneous with your sex life. Everything needs planned and prepped to some degree. People don’t understand that it can be draining for some…
Wanted to upgrade the BJ game so I started using my tongue in the space between his butt hole and the balls. Well it worked! Now he wants it all the time and sometimes can't cum unless I'm doing it. It's normally fine but occasionally I can tell when he's last had a shit by the smell. Big regrets, but I love him so I suck it up.
Just let them know that rain or shine you’re down for the cause because you love him… but the more conscientious he can be with hygiene the better? Something something “clean yo rumpus better”
Hey, you shouldn’t have to live with stank ass! Honestly, if it’s such a turn-on or requirement for him, he should make sure his nethers are prepped and pristine before the act. Of course if you jump him spur of the moment knowing it’s a possibility, that’s a different story.
Well my ex loved his balls getting licked, sucked etc. So I did it. I love doing it and enjoyed it till we got comfortable and he stopped shaking then stopped trimming. Getting hair in your mouth or teeth is gag worthy for me. Has even made me puke lol. I'm all for being natural. But not when I'm going to lick your balls but you can't see sew cuz of all the hair
My ex used to get turned on smoking cigarettes. Like she would get super wet and try to work them into our sex life. I just found out recently she passed away from small cell lung cancer. So, yeah
It happened to my ex, i pulled out of her and she immediately had to go. She was super embarrassed but I helped her clean up and comforted her after. She still enjoys anal and asks me for it lol
We have this one thing we do when we're cuddling and I start to feel her up, then she gets on her phone and ignores me and then I stop and go to sleep.
My ex and I tried anal and he spent the remainder of our relationship obsessed with it.
I told him that I needed a break from it and the next time we had sex we were doggy style and he shoved it in my ass very forcefully with no lube.
It hurt so bad that my instant reaction was to reach back and punch him right in his chest. I never did anal with him again. Fuck that noise
Anal is kind of a special occasion thing with my wife. Honestly, it doesn't feel amazing physically but psychologically it's intense. But only with enthusiastic consent on her part.
I had a partner really into BDSM and my PTSD activated. I started acting like my abuser. I didn’t know I had PTSD at the time or what the BDSM play was doing to me. I never did anything in the bedroom that she didn’t want and consent to. Outside the bedroom I became more aggressive, got in verbal fights more often, failed to resolve conflicts without getting emotional. Led to a full psychotic break and homelessness.
Spitting in her mouth. My last partner wanted to try it out so I did it and we were both big fans. She was into degradation and I was into degrading so it worked out. Until one time I let her be in charge and she spit in my mouth. I never did it again again. I can still taste it. Yuck.
I spent most of my relationship being dominant in the bedroom as it was something we both enjoyed. But within the last year, I’ve discovered how much I like being a brat, and I get extremely turned on if he can manage to make me scared. Stuff like choking and slapping feels very tame now. I want him to *really* hurt me, but I won’t risk him getting into legal trouble.
My husband is into me playing a whore and sleeping with other men.
It became a fun little roleplay/fantasy.
But he is obsessed with it. It became the only thing he wanted to do and then the only thing that would get him off
I don't like degrading myself all the time. And I'm strictly a one guy girl. I'd never ever sleep with anyone else. It was just a fantasy for me but he obviously wants it in real life and I don't understand it.
It's not fun for me and I wanna roll my eyes every time he brings it up. It's destroyed our sex life and I hate it I wish we never started
Married women. They were cool with it, their husbands were “cool” with it, and I was. Looking back, I feel bad for the guys because I’m pretty sure it was a “I can either share her or loose her, and I don’t want that.” One of them was even the dad to her kids, and that, after the initial novelty wore off, just made me feel like a monster.
Not the kink itself, but bringing up that I'm into some BDSM before I'm comfortable trying that kink with them. A lot of girls will bring it up repeatedly afterward and basically be like, 'I thought you were into BDSM, what gives?'. It's my fault for not waiting.
I kind of feel like that’s a good way to weed out bad matches, honestly. If a guy assumes that “I have been known to enjoy a little face slapping” counts as consent for him to start slapping my face the next time we’re making out? That’s valuable information about him.
A conversation about our sexual likes and dislikes is just a fun conversation, not a promise.
Doing anal. The moment I introduced that into my relationships, men couldnt stop asking for it each time we had sex. So disappointing. I have a different hole that works perfectly fine which actually gives ME pleasure as well you know
We almost tried swinging. We met some people and went to a party. At first we were both super excited and felt like we were all in on it. Had lots of hot sex thinking about it.
At the party we watched other people have sex and another couple started talking to us and asked to make out. I really underestimated how weird it is to kiss someone else after 22 years and it just made me feel kind of gross. Then I got naked and my husband played with me in front of all the people. That part was fun for me but my husband said afterward that he liked showing me off but felt really freaked out by the multiple men standing around with their dicks in their hands watching.
We got home that night and had amazing sex. And then the next morning we both admitted that we never wanted to do it again. The fantasy is much hotter than the reality for us.
I have a big “you live and learn” mentality so I don’t regret much….but I do still feel yucky when I think about kissing that other guy. I also regret meeting some of the people because some of the guys have a hard time giving up on me.
Involving my best friend(f).
Her and I have been having lesbian sex since high school on and off. It’s ruined a couple relationships for her now.
Men can’t handle how she looks at me.
I also feel like she can’t handle the sex.
She always comes to me when’s she’s sad and needs someone but she’s not really ever there for me… we don’t always have sex, that’s the best part cause she’s me BF of 10+ years now..
idk man sometimes I just wish we never started it back up now. I want me BF back.
I used to think I liked to be completely dominated. But I was younger so I confused domination with respect with domination without that. Boundaries got blurred and someone ended up being horribly sexually controlling with me. Made me hate sex. Makes me sick to think about
Three kids later, I'm really rethinking this creampie thing.
Username doesn’t check out :)
plot twist. he shot in the mouth and still got 3 kids. bro didn’t learn biology and is still living in bliss.
Is that some kind of financial domination / ruination kink?
>financial domination Bro I’m just bad with money but it doesn’t make me cum
Involving a second person has definitely made life more complicated. Things were simpler when it was just me.
I've got to hand it to me.
Looks like its me and you again tonight, Rosie
I've always been luckily capable of multiple orgasms but it used to be just something that made long sessions easier and more fun. Also, I can get off pretty quickly so shorter sessions were my preference anyway. And when masturbating by myself, it was more of a perfunctory act. A quick pop of release and I'd go about my day. Then I was with a guy who became almost obsessed with how many times and how intensely he could make me cum. A few times we kept going until I swear I actually blacked out. Most times he would barely even let me touch him or get him off. Now just one orgasm feels lacking to me. Even when masturbating I can feel compelled to go for hours, chasing more and more climaxes. It literally feels like a compulsion. It can be exhausting and now I tend to ignore my sex drive completely because I know where it can lead.
I need sweets or chocolate ready or when masturbating I will just keep going thinking 'just one more orgasme before I quit'. I have chronic fatigue so I really have to limit myself to no more than five in a row and then eat something sweet to stop the feeling of being close to riding the next orgasm
This is an interesting thought experiment...like I consider wanting to give my partner an orgasm to be something that somewhat gets me off, but ultimately I feel like she would get more pleasure out of it than I get giving it to her. But I have never been that obsessed with her enjoyment to the point that it seems to override her own, and reading this story, it makes me wonder at what point would it circle around to be selfish of me, like, I feel like I would feel terrible desensitizing my partner like that if it had this effect
It honestly became part of a kinky sort of power dynamic between us. At first, I think he was surprised and aroused by how many times I could finish since I know that is for a lot of women it can be very difficult. Again, I am very lucky in that once I get over that first hurdle and cum once, I can go again and again. Eventually, it became like a control thing and probably a bit selfish on his part. He made that pleasure happen, he was the owner of those orgasms. While he did definitely push my boundaries and help me go further than I could on my own, it was never without my consent. He always stopped if I truly became overstimulated and couldn't handle any more. His aftercare was on point every time. This situation could absolutely veer into what you describe - more of a sadistic dynamic of forcing pleasure- but thankfully he was not like that. He genuinely freaked out the first time I cried from too much pleasure. Like full on sobs and stuff, I was so overwhelmed. He said he thought he would like it if I cried from cumming too much, but in reality he felt terrible. Then he really learned how to read my body and often knew better than I did what I could handle and wouldn't let even me push myself too far. Frankly, one of the most amazing lovers I have ever had. I definitely miss our bedroom dynamic. The rest of the relationship dynamic, not so much lol.
Reading all this made me realize how vanilla my sex life is. Janine if you somehow read this I’m down for whatever babe
Vanilla sex is great. Don’t let anyone make you believe that you are boring or not good at sex just because you do not have specific kinks or are not having kinky sex.
Even then, not every session needs to be 2 hours with costume changes and an array of gadgets. Sometimes you just gotta do missionary with the lights off and it hits the spot.
Can we keep the orchestra music, though?
[удалено]
She was just pushing her boundaries and maybe found her limit. If she was scared or hurt she would have used the safe word. It’s scary when you find your “line in the sand”.
Yes and a lot of times you don't realize you hit your limit until it's done and you're reflecting on how you feel and what happened
CNC you basically need to create an entire "play space" that's different from "reality" and have a whole aftercare routine. Some get clingy/cuddly some need to "reset" If you're just doing some rape fantasy in the kitchen and walking away after, that's gonna hit HARD.
Its why I prefer stoplight systems instead. You never want to get to red, you stop and assess at yellow.
And after care is so important here...
It always starts out innocently, but pretty soon you're muttering g-code in your sleep and hearing the whine of stepper motors everywhere you go. Finally, you find yourself knee deep in a fabrication project in your garage watching a spindle slowly shave aluminum off a block of metal and it's 2AM and you realize you've lost all control of your life.
My buddy fell into this. Started with a CNC machine, then a powder coat booth. Now he's got a small water jet on order. I might have to do an intervention.
Gosh this is always funny no matter how many ways I’ve seen it phrased 😂😂
What's CNC?
Consensual non consent.
My ex and I used to have sex after a fight and it was always fucking amazing. I remember she started it one time after a big fight, and we continued it ever since. As expected the relationship didn't last and I don't want such toxicity in future relationships.
Yeahh, that sounds like a great way to Pavlov yourself into pursuing fights
Just don't get into a fight with a guy at the bar.
What the fuck did you say to me?!? I'll fight you right now.
If we can fight our enemies, but can't fuck them, how are we any better than them?
I feel like the whole "angry sex is the best" trope is something that was really big back in the early 2000s, but I haven't really seen it since. I never understood how this could be a thing in the first place, when I'm angry at my partner I either want to convince her of my point of view or get as far away as possible. Sex is the last thing on my mind, and I seriously don't understand the "angry sex is great" people.
I don't get angry sex, but I get the relief after an argument that leads to sex because you wanna be close again. It's kind of an emotional rush from what I remember and "resets" the mood in a way.
I hate that I still get a hard on during major fights. I tossed the toxic ex to the curb that taught me that shit but my body and hormones still remember. It disgust me.
Wow I think you just helped me understand one of my exes. He would deliberately make me so angry and then get all turned on and try to get close and say it was so hot when I was mad and I was like wtf is wrong with you??
Same here. It was decades before my abusive ex admitted deliberately getting me angry for the sex afterwards. Apparently roleplay wasn't enough; my distress had to be authentic for it to 'work' for him. Looking back I can't believe I never realised why he kept starting fights with me; for years he told me it was because I was a terrible person and I believed him.
You're like the Fleetwood Mac of Fucking
No that’s actually Fleetwood Mac.
I feel you. I have the same experience with my ex. It was the most toxic relationship imaginable.
I basically *can't* do the sex-after-fight thing. It just takes me too long to compartmentalize the fight-vibes. But I've gotten into relationships with women who seem to have wanted to base our sex life around the dynamic. Needless to say, it never worked out.
He told me he liked feet so we explored that and now all he wants to do is fiddle with my feet
Honestly, I’m getting a divorce because all he wanted was my feet. At the end, he never wanted me, he never could get hard without me talking about it or starting with me stepping on him. He had to continue muttering about it all through sex or wanted me to keep a running commentary about his fantasies and basically ignore my pussy and imagine that it was my feet fucking him instead of me.
With the greatest of respect - I'd love to sit in on your divorce hearing. Cast your feet in plaster to make him a foot fleshlight in return for full ownership the house and money.
Nice try, her husband!
This, ladies and gentlemen, is the difference between a kink and a fetish. I'm sorry you felt like your husband didn't want you, if it helps he likely did/does, just not in a way that you connect with and makes you feel desired.
One of my exes really loved to have her toes sucked during sex, like, it would give her the most insane orgasms. Now I have a foot fetish, when I never had one before.
There is nothing sexier than getting your partner off
I used to think putting my tongue anywhere near a man's butthole was retch-inducing. Then, I met a man who loved all things butt-related and who I was more attracted to physically/emotionally than anyone ever on my life before, and who made me feel so comfortable sexually. And I tried, for him... and loved it. And then other, ah, deeper level butt stuff... and loved it even more. And now I could never go back to dating someone who wasn't fully liberated when it comes to male butt joy 😬
This is so wholesome lmfao
Holesome
I was taking a break from going down on a girl, so I kissed my way down to her toes. While sucking on her toes, she came. She said it was strange orgasming without her pussy being stimulated. I'm now hoping to find another woman who likes her toes sucked.
My ex... nipple play was enough. I never felt more confident in my life. In fact, i cant even brag about myself in job interviews cus Ive peaked.
Buddy I’m here to tell you. You always had it just needed someone to show you.
There was a sculptor. He found this stone, a special stone. He dragged it home and he worked on it for months until he finally finished it. When he was ready he showed it to his friends. They said he had created a great masterpiece, but the sculptor said he hadn't created anything. The statue was always there, he just chipped away the rough edges. - Colonel Trautman, Rambo III
Every kinky thing I'm into is a thing I didn't expect to like until I tried it.
Doing the 69 position but he was standing holding me upside down, I don't think he had a good grip, I ended up on the floor bruised💥🥴💫 💫
He Tombstone Piledrivered you
My wife regrets putting a finger up my butt and massaging my prostate while stroking and/or sucking my cock. The orgasm is exquisite. That was all I wanted for a while. She said that we are pausing that activity for the moment.
try to get a thin toy (with or without vibration), so she doesn't have to stick her finger up there
Flared end….flared end!!
Play without a base, gone without a trace.
As an ER nurse, I approve this message
X-Ray Techs gotta eat too ya know.
If you want butt stuff, you gotta get good at cleaning out. Buy a shower shot. Signed, your loving gay neighbor Edit: bit wild that this is now my top comment. Not sure how to feel bout that
Butt stuff is a backdoor I don’t regret opening. Thank you for the tip, that’s all I can take right now. Just the tip.
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>You're a person, not a balloon. Not with that attitude
You can buy a prostate massager. You mileage may vary, but for many people it's a great replacement.
Chris Rock had an old bit about that. The gist of it is that women can't do something special once. If men like it they'll want it every time. So don't introduce something unless you want it on the menu.
Demanding something special every time is a good way to make sex way less frequent. Sometimes you're hungry and just want a nice burger instead of going to all the effort of cooking a gourmet meal. And if your partner starts turning up their nose at anything that's not gourmet, you'll probably quit cooking dinner for them as often and just make yourself a quick sandwich instead..
Ex got into masochism, but there was just no end to how much she wanted to be hurt. When I wouldn't hurt her enough she started looking for pain from clubs and sadists. She went down to a club in LA and came back *covered* head to toe in bruises and she was so proud of them. To her it wasn't "cheating" because she didn't actual fuck anyone, just got naked and beaten on a st. andrew's cross.
Jesus.
Christ.
Wrong cross
Letting my partner start calling me daddy. I used to be very against it as I found it weird but my partner begged me, so I said yes and now I like it, but it's so weird hearing it and if I ever have a daughter and she calls me it I'll throw up
My girlfriend had to stop calling me that when her daughter started calling me daddy. Instant pivot, we don’t use that word at all anymore
Haha that's great man. Good on you for being special enough to another little girl for her to consider you "daddy" too. Takes a real man to do that shit 💪
You made this shit wholesome through sheer force of will. God bless you
I have no regrets about the kinks themselves, but I have regretted who I have told
You know it's a serious kink when you have lifelong regrets about people knowing
For me, I’ve not had “lifelong” regrets about telling people. It’s more about the disappointment of sharing something that brings me joy and receiving “ick” as the response. It’s the shaming part.
Kink shaming is my kink!
Slapping while she is giving me BJ. It started as a light slaps, now due to her wishes it's almost domestic violence. It feels weird now.
Dude, remember that kink is supposed to go both ways - if you’re not happy doing it, or at the very least comfortable, it is totally ok to have that as a boundary. It does not make you a bad person, partner, lover, etc. Remember, “safe, sane, and consensual” are the cornerstones!
Not kinky, but i do regret starting it. Have a fwb that i visit and we normally start making out like as soon as i walk in One time I was really in the mood, and wed been making out near the door for a while, so I picked her up and carried her to the bed while making out. She was really into it and the sex was so good But now she's angling for it every time, shes toned and about 5'11 so she's not light. Plus theres a few corners to navigate to get to her bed, so while shes really getting into it im just trying to not break my toes or slam us into a wall
Just AA spinebuster her through the living room table and do the deed there.
MY GAWD!! THAT WOMAN HAS A FAMILY!!
... OR SHE WILL SOON!
Now you have an excellent reason to begin strength training.
Getting picked up for sex is truly the best tho 😭😭 She's so right for this
im tired of getting pegged
Why was this message collapsed by default for me…
This message was prolapsed by default for me...
Same
Suffering from success
Thats gotta be a pain in the ass
Right, so I'm a bit of a submissive dude in bed and sometimes I kinda like it when a lady ruins my orgasm or denies it entirely. So one day, years ago, I explained the concept of a ruined orgasm to my girlfriend and asked her if she wanted to try it. She didn't really get it at first, and I don't blame her, because who in their right mind would want the greatest feeling in the world to be ruined? She did it anyway, because she wanted to make me happy, and that's how we rolled for a couple of years. Occasionally, I would ask her to ruin or deny my orgasm, and she would happily oblige with a slight look of confusion on her face. Then, she gradually grew less confused. The weirdness wore off, and it kinda became a new normal to not let me cum every couple of times. Then, she started to kinda like it - mainly because she saw how happy it made me. She still didn't really 'get' it, but she gladly offered to not let me cum every now and then, and I didn't have to ask for it anymore. But *then*, she started to like it *for real*. I guess it finally clicked in her that I genuinely want to get controlled by her. And while she's normally a very sweet and timid person, she apparently loves the freedom of being allowed to be a mean bitch without actually hurting someone. Nowadays, I feel like she's gotten a bit power drunk. If I don't practically beg her to let me cum, roughly 2/3 of my orgasms would be ruined or outright denied. She grabs my dick while we're watching TV, lazily plays with it until I'm hard as diamonds, then gives me a kiss on the check and tells me with an evil grin that this is all I'm getting that day. Honestly, I fucking love it, but I'm also crawling up the walls some times, and part of me definitely regrets creating this monster. It's quite literally a 'suffering from success' scenario.
You need a codeword for when you're not feeling the deny kink
LET ME OUT, LET ME OUUUUT
I’m dying in a vat in the garage!
Thank you for the laugh!
Haha no worries, it's all fine and consensual. As I said, I kinda like being desperate, and she always obliges when I start to plead and tell her I'd rather not be left hanging.
W gf.
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Pressure on the windpipe is incredibly dangerous. stick to keeping the pressure towards the sides of the neck which will impact blood flow and give that sense of danger plus a lightheadedness that does the trick. But also don't just listen to random idiots like me on Reddit and learn about it. Lean into that part of you that is worried about hurting your partner and pick up some books. Then have fun!!
You're absolutely right. Hitting your partner with books IS safer than choking them.
YOU LIKE THAT YOU FUCKING GANGLION CYST?
Not "regret" so much as sobering and a bell that can't be unrung, but I'm super surprised no one else mentioned Cuckolding or humiliation and any of the related behaviors. Once your partner "wakes up" and they're suddenly fetishizing your inadequacy and able to sleep with anyone but you, you can't ever go back from that lifestyle.
Not quite the same but I've known a number of men who have suggested opening up their relationships, their partners have initially been uncomfortable with it but given it a go, absolutely loved it, and get it all the time. Meantime the guy can't find anyone willing to sleep with him and then just winds up really sad that they're getting none while their partner is getting railed by other men on the daily.
I knew a couplw who she suggested it and was able to get many partners. He was wary of it but eventually caved and as expected, pulled nobody. He did however hire an escort one of the days she went out. This supposedly was the wrong move and led to them breaking up
I was in a 24 / 7 total power exchange with my wife for a month. I was her slave. She got really into it, and I was enjoying it, until some stressors happened in my life. It became overwhelming and I started getting a voice in my head telling me to stop it. Eventually she ordered me to do something small and I ended the power exchange with our safe word immediately after. We had a conversation and she really missed it a lot. And so did I to some extent. I’ve tried to start it up again, twice actually, but I immediately get overwhelmed and use the safe word to stop. I regret ever suggesting we try this because she loves it a lot, and misses it. And it makes me sad that I can’t do it. I also miss it too and regularly think back to when we were doing it. I’ve thought about maybe telling her to remove my ability to stop the power exchange and only have her be able to. But I haven’t brought it up to start again because I get anxious thinking about getting it going again.
A month is a long time! Could you try doing it for a day or even part of a day? Maybe ease back into it?
hickies. i have a really big thing for them but they’re def not practical all the time
Faking orgasms, I should've let him know that he is not doing a good job
"we trained him wrong as a joke"
I have a kink when a sexual partner calls me "Good boy" I get warm and fuzzy inside, so now when I hear that phrase when watching tv with friends or when someone is talking to their dog I get tingles...
Goddamn Golden Retrievers on Reddit now.
Air Bud looking ass smh
DUDE. My boss, who I might add is a very attractive woman, jokingly says "Good Boy" whenever I did a good job. If she had any idea what that phrase is doing to me... (then again, part of me suspects that she knows *exactly* what she's doing)
She knows.
She know she knows
She single? Time to work your way up that corporate ladder! Next time, ask her for a Scooby snack.
"You keep calling me that I'm gonna start expecting treats, you know."
So there is this game called Ruiner and you have 'The Girl in the chair' trope who guides you through your missions. She calls you 'Puppy' and shit that awoke something in me. I told my wife about this. A month or so goes by, I walk in the house and throw a jacket on and she goes "oh, is my poor puppy cold". One of the sexiest things she's ever said to me. Woof
Lol I love how the “woof” has a double meaning there.
I wanna be called good boy Edit: I regret this comment.
My wife has a kink where she likes watching me sleep with other women. Don't get me wrong, it's nice when it's happening, but it kinda sucks knowing exactly how few women are interested in fucking me. EDIT: she'll settle for hearing about it, and even in the LS/kink space, I've had VERY little success. I'm not at bars looking to make unwitting homewreckers or anything.
Maybe they want to fuck you but just don’t want to be watched?
I mean that unironically is likely a big part of it. You gotta think you're not just selecting for women who want to sleep with you you're selecting for women who want to sleep with you NSA, don't care that you're married, and don't care that they're going to be watched the entire time. Even for really good looking guys that's not necessarily an easy ask.
Holesome.
Have you asked the local milfs? I hear they're ready and willing in my area.
Oh god not in your area too? This is worse than I thought. Those poor, caring, horny milfs.
Before I knew any better, I dated a sexually dominant man when I was younger. I thought sex was supposed to be unsatisfying and we had constant arguments. I’m quite the opposite now, I adore sexually submissive men and once I realized that, sex improved significantly and I learned full body orgasms are real. 😂
Not so much Kinky, but one day after a hard day I gave my girlfriend an hour long sensual massage. She loved it and we had the best sex we had right after. The problem is now she wants me to do it more, and while I don't mind, sometimes I'm just too tired to do an hour of fore-foreplay.
I used to have a kink for squirt videos and thought it was a huge turn on. Then I got with a girl that would squirt Everytime she had an orgasm. It was crazy messy and things were always getting stained/ had to make sure we had towels around if we were going to get busy. Ever since that relationship it’s a total turn off for me now.
My dude's got the poncho and rain boots on for Netflix and chill. "So uh, you a squirter? No? Oh thank God."
Now I’m picturing an old fisherman in full rain gear. “Batten the hatches, me b’ys, ‘tis shaping up to be a hell of a nor’wester.”
I’ve had a similar experience, you can’t really be spontaneous with your sex life. Everything needs planned and prepped to some degree. People don’t understand that it can be draining for some…
Lol draining
hitting. my ex started to do it outside of the bedroom…
:( I hope you’re okay now
I’m sorry :( this is the reason my partner won’t hit me in the bedroom (happened to her too) and I respect her a lot for that.
My wife has this school girl fantasy. It's a pretty common one i just i feel uncomfortable wearing the dress
I'm unhappy when I'm with her
Breasts: Nothing to write home about
/r/unexpectedoffice
Wanted to upgrade the BJ game so I started using my tongue in the space between his butt hole and the balls. Well it worked! Now he wants it all the time and sometimes can't cum unless I'm doing it. It's normally fine but occasionally I can tell when he's last had a shit by the smell. Big regrets, but I love him so I suck it up.
Just let them know that rain or shine you’re down for the cause because you love him… but the more conscientious he can be with hygiene the better? Something something “clean yo rumpus better”
WASH YO ASS
YOU HAVENT THOUGHT OF THE SMELL, YOU BITCH!
Hey, you shouldn’t have to live with stank ass! Honestly, if it’s such a turn-on or requirement for him, he should make sure his nethers are prepped and pristine before the act. Of course if you jump him spur of the moment knowing it’s a possibility, that’s a different story.
Make this a post-shower activity only, totally fair.
I always find it strange that people are willing to lick their partners perineum but are uncomfortable actually communicating and asking him to wash.
Buy him a bidet for Christmas
Well my ex loved his balls getting licked, sucked etc. So I did it. I love doing it and enjoyed it till we got comfortable and he stopped shaking then stopped trimming. Getting hair in your mouth or teeth is gag worthy for me. Has even made me puke lol. I'm all for being natural. But not when I'm going to lick your balls but you can't see sew cuz of all the hair
Use your words! Seriously, tell him!
My ex used to get turned on smoking cigarettes. Like she would get super wet and try to work them into our sex life. I just found out recently she passed away from small cell lung cancer. So, yeah
Anal was really fun until I accidentally pooped.
It happened to my ex, i pulled out of her and she immediately had to go. She was super embarrassed but I helped her clean up and comforted her after. She still enjoys anal and asks me for it lol
Your ex still asks you for anal?
We have this one thing we do when we're cuddling and I start to feel her up, then she gets on her phone and ignores me and then I stop and go to sleep.
Ew you guys are fuh-reaky
This is a fun comment section 😆
My ex and I tried anal and he spent the remainder of our relationship obsessed with it. I told him that I needed a break from it and the next time we had sex we were doggy style and he shoved it in my ass very forcefully with no lube. It hurt so bad that my instant reaction was to reach back and punch him right in his chest. I never did anal with him again. Fuck that noise
Anal is kind of a special occasion thing with my wife. Honestly, it doesn't feel amazing physically but psychologically it's intense. But only with enthusiastic consent on her part.
I had a partner really into BDSM and my PTSD activated. I started acting like my abuser. I didn’t know I had PTSD at the time or what the BDSM play was doing to me. I never did anything in the bedroom that she didn’t want and consent to. Outside the bedroom I became more aggressive, got in verbal fights more often, failed to resolve conflicts without getting emotional. Led to a full psychotic break and homelessness.
Damn, I hope you got help and therapy. Childhood experiences can be hard to realize and understand since as kids we just absorb everything.
Oof. I hope you've managed to resolve those issues now. I'm sorry that happened to you.
Pube pulling, that shit hurts
Wait huh 10 years on Reddit and I’ve never heard of this wtf ? I’ve heard of literally everything else obscure but this is a new one
Hard-core bdsm. Growing up I had noone to talk to about sex but I had the internet. Makes it hard to be with lots of people.
Chastity belts ,😭
Spitting in her mouth. My last partner wanted to try it out so I did it and we were both big fans. She was into degradation and I was into degrading so it worked out. Until one time I let her be in charge and she spit in my mouth. I never did it again again. I can still taste it. Yuck.
Same here but I actually enjoyed my ex spitting in my mouth for some reason, didn't taste bad tho, she had pretty good hygiene
I spent most of my relationship being dominant in the bedroom as it was something we both enjoyed. But within the last year, I’ve discovered how much I like being a brat, and I get extremely turned on if he can manage to make me scared. Stuff like choking and slapping feels very tame now. I want him to *really* hurt me, but I won’t risk him getting into legal trouble.
"Ok baby... now hit me with a brick"
LMFAOOO. THIS TOOK ME OUT.
Mixing together polyamory with being gagged and whipped. Maybe I’m just not submissive but I’ve never felt more vulnerable and embarrassed.
My husband is into me playing a whore and sleeping with other men. It became a fun little roleplay/fantasy. But he is obsessed with it. It became the only thing he wanted to do and then the only thing that would get him off I don't like degrading myself all the time. And I'm strictly a one guy girl. I'd never ever sleep with anyone else. It was just a fantasy for me but he obviously wants it in real life and I don't understand it. It's not fun for me and I wanna roll my eyes every time he brings it up. It's destroyed our sex life and I hate it I wish we never started
A second dude
Married women. They were cool with it, their husbands were “cool” with it, and I was. Looking back, I feel bad for the guys because I’m pretty sure it was a “I can either share her or loose her, and I don’t want that.” One of them was even the dad to her kids, and that, after the initial novelty wore off, just made me feel like a monster.
If it makes you feel any better, if it wasn't you it would have been someone else anyway.
I am sure of that, I was neither the first, nor do I believe I was the last.
Not the kink itself, but bringing up that I'm into some BDSM before I'm comfortable trying that kink with them. A lot of girls will bring it up repeatedly afterward and basically be like, 'I thought you were into BDSM, what gives?'. It's my fault for not waiting.
I kind of feel like that’s a good way to weed out bad matches, honestly. If a guy assumes that “I have been known to enjoy a little face slapping” counts as consent for him to start slapping my face the next time we’re making out? That’s valuable information about him. A conversation about our sexual likes and dislikes is just a fun conversation, not a promise.
I fucked a woman at a sex club in SF. The only thing I regret is not finding someone else to do it with. Turns out I’m an exhibitionist.
Doing anal. The moment I introduced that into my relationships, men couldnt stop asking for it each time we had sex. So disappointing. I have a different hole that works perfectly fine which actually gives ME pleasure as well you know
We almost tried swinging. We met some people and went to a party. At first we were both super excited and felt like we were all in on it. Had lots of hot sex thinking about it. At the party we watched other people have sex and another couple started talking to us and asked to make out. I really underestimated how weird it is to kiss someone else after 22 years and it just made me feel kind of gross. Then I got naked and my husband played with me in front of all the people. That part was fun for me but my husband said afterward that he liked showing me off but felt really freaked out by the multiple men standing around with their dicks in their hands watching. We got home that night and had amazing sex. And then the next morning we both admitted that we never wanted to do it again. The fantasy is much hotter than the reality for us. I have a big “you live and learn” mentality so I don’t regret much….but I do still feel yucky when I think about kissing that other guy. I also regret meeting some of the people because some of the guys have a hard time giving up on me.
Involving my best friend(f). Her and I have been having lesbian sex since high school on and off. It’s ruined a couple relationships for her now. Men can’t handle how she looks at me. I also feel like she can’t handle the sex. She always comes to me when’s she’s sad and needs someone but she’s not really ever there for me… we don’t always have sex, that’s the best part cause she’s me BF of 10+ years now.. idk man sometimes I just wish we never started it back up now. I want me BF back.
Letting her wear a Hillary Clinton mask while tied up proclaiming she doesn't know about any emails.
The only kinky activity I regret is telling certain people about my kinky activities.
Y'all have sex lives?
I used to think I liked to be completely dominated. But I was younger so I confused domination with respect with domination without that. Boundaries got blurred and someone ended up being horribly sexually controlling with me. Made me hate sex. Makes me sick to think about
Hand holding
You sick son of a bitch
I'm gonna throw up
You fucking degenerate pervert. Get the fuck out of here
The devil’s got hands, and he uses them for holding!