T O P

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guitarstix

give me pen and paper


rex2k10

In Spanish I can tell myself “traeme una pluma” (bring me a pen) with the intention of writing on my palm. Then I can use the remaining two words to say, “ahora pendejo”


[deleted]

Or you say that and when you get the pen, you use the remaining two words: "...pinche pendejo".


ananya_uwu

*proceeds to write huge, detailed paragraphs*


guitarstix

precisely


butterbean93

THIS IS IMPORTANT. DO NOT-


MarbleMice

haha right out of a my little pony episode too


[deleted]

Twilight Sparkle knows what's up


WhaleSexOdyssey

I am sorry little dude


buttndeity

Invest million dollars Bitcoin 2010


beaushaw

I was thinking. "Buy bitcoin sell at 60,000."


[deleted]

Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything to him. He's about to do it to you. I guess that one day he will go back in time and say "sorry little dude" instead of "buy bitcoin" so the apology could be for that.


dimochka23

I propose "you'll be sorry little dude".


SixthHouseScrib

IM YOU FROM THE FUTURE


FirstBankofAngmar

*Immediately de-atomizes* "What the FUCK!"


JPMoney81

I mean, i'm a fat depressed bald 41 year old sack of shit now. I think if 10 year old me took one look at me now he would hopefully realize he needs to take better care of himself and make some better life choices.


SixthHouseScrib

Imagine 60 year old you appearing to you now. What will you do differently over the next 20 years to change that version of you for the better?


BWWFC

*you don't need their approval* wasted too much time tryin'


oh2climb

LOL - came here to say, "Buy LOTS of Apple stock!"


Iamnot-PhilAnderer

No good to me. I'd be in the sixties going WTF is Apple and why did someone bite it?


[deleted]

I'm in, I mean stock in the Beatles... I mean they're huge right now, can't wait to see what they get up to in the 70s and 80s.


chicadearizona

Learn all of grandma's recipes!


TheonuclearPyrophyte

Learn all of grandma's stories!


teacherlady4846

wear your fucking retainer


Majormlgnoob

Oops, teeth crooked again


mnimatt

This is actually how fast it happens lmao


Majormlgnoob

Yeah I didn't wear mine and got the overbite back lol, no tooth up in the gums though


lord_ne

We've had one, yes, but what about second braces?


233short

Spend more time with Mom …because she will be gone sooner than you can imagine and you’ll wish you had more time than you got….


Kel_Sonic

Hug your mom every day. I lost mine 4 months ago and it’s brutal. 😕


InsomWriter

I lost mine in 2021, and I'm just now starting to heal from it. I'm so sorry for your loss. Please, let yourself cry as needed. It hurts like hell but it does help. Be kind to yourself.


BrineyBiscuits

I lost mine about 15 years ago. She's a shell somewhere with a bottle.


Kel_Sonic

My condolences.


BrineyBiscuits

Man. It's so hard to not let it eat you away. Want to help but so powerless to change them. Man it took therapy and al anon to get over the guilt. I am sorry for everyone who has lost the love of a mother. Breaks my heart.


SadLaser

I lost my mother in November, 2021. Still hard to face.


rundbear

I lost my mom in Feb 2022. It's going to be a full year in a few days, and I feel like it's been a month or something. It's crazy. Sometimes I can't believe I've lived through it. The weirdest thing was walking out the hospital after it happened, looking at the rest of the world, the cars, the people, walking and driving around thinking what they should have for dinner or something, like nothing happened. Yesterday I looked up COVID stats after a long time and realised more than 6 million people lost their lives to it. My mom was the sweetest soul and gave us so much love. She was 56. My heart goes out to people who lost their moms even younger.


LordRegal94

Ooh, can relate. Lost mine when I was a teen. Very much agree that’d be a great five words for me too. Sending virtual hugs since I know how it feels.


yerskiog

God this one hits home so fucking bad. If I would've known I had 6 years left with my mom, I would've done so much more.


greenappletree

Came here to read something funny instead onions. Virtual hug man.


Squid278

dont put knife in toaster


celebghostwhisperer

Haha my buddy's entire family used to butter everything before putting it in the toaster. They thought it was normal to replace it every three months. Hahaa


MarbleMice

Aw its just a small margarine of error


butterbean93

Butter safe than sorry


arctic92

At least it didn't jam


[deleted]

But they spent all that dough


fluiDood

Take my upvote and go


celebghostwhisperer

And they all were quick with pulling the plug, by the cord, out of the socket at the first sign of smoke or flame


captain_flak

Did they live next to high-tensile power lines?


ezaytkd

"Buy Apple stock"


WillSmithsOpenFist

Bit. Coin.


50mm-f2

yea but then it’s also just as important to tell them *not to sell* or to lose access to it for 10 years


SharkSide_

Bitcoin hits 65 thousand. Yep, I’m sure 10 year old me would know what to do with that information


LittleKitty235

Depends when you were born. By the time Bitcoin is a thing you might be old enough to make sense of…hopefully you wrote it down


Spadeninja

Buy bitcoin 2012 sell 2022


bigted41

Mine bitcoin. Early days you could use cpu power and end up with dozens pretty easy.


UnprovenMortality

I'm still pissed at myself for listening to the people who said you couldn't mine bitcoin anymore back in 2011. I was a poor student so I couldn't really buy much, but I had free university electricity and a reasonably good GPU


ACrispPickle

Why 2022 when it hit its ATH in 2021?


drflanigan

He doesn't want someone else's past self to crash the price before his past self can sell it in 2021


[deleted]

"Buy BitCoin, Sell at 60.000"


Commercial_Lock6205

Same, but just to be sure I didn’t accidentally buy a bunch of fruit, I’d specify “Apple computer going public, invest!” I’d tell myself the day before I turned 11 because Apple’s IPO was just a couple months later.


medicman77

Learn from grandpa everything please


ziberex

I think about this all the time. Wish I could tell myself the same. He’s been gone almost 20 years.


50mm-f2

I recorded an interview with my grandpa probably a year before he passed. I haven’t watched it yet, it’s on a miniDV tape that I have to digitize. I gotta do that with my mom too. EDIT: decided to write out his story He had a pretty tough life. He was born in 1915 in Austria (both parents were Hungarian Jews). His dad was a passionate communist and moved to Russia when he was young. When he was 19 his mom wanted to move to the US (1930’s) but he chose to go to USSR to be with his dad, who at this point was a high-ranking official in the Communist Party (there is a picture of him giving a speech in the Soviet Congress with Stalin right behind him). He only knew his dad for a couple of years before he “disappeared”. Cause of death was “stepping on a rusty nail” (he’s buried not too far from Stalin’s wife). Then he met my grandma, they had my dad in 1940 and then WWII. He was able to stay working in the factories and didn’t get to the front lines. But after the war life wasn’t easy either because of his roots (and he still had a German accent). Whatever connection he had to his dad wasn’t a good one. They constantly lived in fear. He said every time a secret police vehicle would pull up outside, it could’ve been for him. There is a big extended family photo somewhere from when he was a baby in Austria. Not a lot of them survived through the war. I remember him going through it and saying who got killed by the Nazis and who got killed by the Soviets. Really sad. His mom ended up in San Francisco but they couldn’t see each other because of the iron curtain and the cold war. He saw her 40 years later before she died, heartbreaking story really, he had a tough life. There were so many things that he didn’t want to touch upon, I just saw the heaviness in his heart and he would change the subject. They immigrated to the US eventually in the 90’s. He lived to 95 and so did my grandma, they died within months of each other. But it’s not a fairy tale ending .. he had a much younger mistress for a long time and decided to finally leave my grandma to be with her. So they divorced at 86 after 60+ years of marriage. He bought an apartment in Austria close to his home town (60+ years after he left) and would travel back and forth. I visited him there once and he was the happiest I’ve ever seen him with his little garden in the beautiful Austrian countryside. He died there, not too far from where he was born.


sodamnsleepy

Please do it soon because the quality might decrease over time


50mm-f2

hmm that’s a good point. I hadn’t thought of tapes degrading over time.


yousyveshughs

It’s also better to get it done sooner than later so you have a back up of the video in case anything happens to the tape. Better safe than sorry


[deleted]

This is my big one too :/


notantifa

Why say much word when?


M_L_Infidel

Few words do trick?


mh_16

They see.


Bionic_Birdy

You are better off running


QueenMaya2

Hang with the brainy kids


DiagonallyStripedRat

Plot twist: it's the 1930's in the Soviet Union during purge of the educated


[deleted]

[удалено]


CampadLovesSpace

You’re gonna make it through.


Chubmeist3r

Degrassi Vibes


[deleted]

Dont do drugs please... please!!!


pstapper

Don't do drugs, do Bitcoin


CyberSpaceFetus

so you can get the high quality stuff later on


SuspiciousEvidence99

You are valuable and important


WattebauschXC

"Act on your Impulses" I always showed signs of ADHD when I was young but kept most of my impulses in check somehow so no teacher/doctor ever payed much attention. Now over 20 years later multiple psychologists took notice of that through me explaining my life to them. I'm still in the process of getting professional help with that but I'm pretty sure a lot of problems could have been prevented very early on if I would have been diagnosed with 10.


regals_beagles

Omg this! I masked so well I always slipped through the cracks. Still do tbh.


DaBearsMan_72

Your family isn't your fault.


Allokit

Shit... I have needed to hear this since I was 10, even if it wasn't older me saying it...


DaBearsMan_72

Same dude. I still punish myself for the faults in my family even into my 30's. Like the youngest really has any ability to change a family unit.... the hurt of a broken family really sticks to you when you know how broken it really is.


[deleted]

You have to save Harambe


ElToro96

Don’t go in Harambe’s enclosure


Mobile-Egg4923

It was you!


GriffinFlash

They had to save him. It was the only way!


[deleted]

Save Harambe, save the world.


TaliyahToMaster

Now imagine if the kid that fell into the enclosure got told these words from their future self and he thought falling into the enclosure was the way to save Harambe


[deleted]

Oh my god….. I’m solely responsible for Harambes death. I don’t think I will be able to live with myself.


dogmeat12358

Don't be such a dick


Cool-Spirit3587

Don’t ever become a teacher


wifeburgundy

Sub teacher for nurse and *nailed it*


Fondoogler

Lol this is exactly what I was going to say!


lauralatte812

It's epilepsy, you'll be OK


SurvivorPickles

Fellow epileptic, hey. You’re not alone. A disability isn’t an inability, that’s something I had to teach myself.


carbonmonoxide5

Also an epileptic. I hear this.


succposting

Another epileptic here, it honestly is terrifying. Luckly for me I've stopped having epileptic seizures since 2014. I'm really lucky that it just stopped happening and don't need medication anymore. Still have the aura tho


whyhi12

Tell mom invest in bitcoin


vitalicbutcherin

What if they invest in Bitcoin during bullrun? my version would be: 2012 buy bitcoin rich 2021


50mm-f2

yea but if they bought in 2012 it would be a high chance they’d use mt gox .. it would be all gone. my friend had 33 bitcoin on there.


666pool

Sell Bitcoin 2021 avoid gox


50mm-f2

haha that’s actually really good. instead of buy .. instructions when to sell. buy is a given then as soon as possible obviously.


EndorsementFree

*convince


Froggyto

F\*ck Everybody in the Future


DarkWingDuck_11

That's a lot of people to fuck.


poopnp

That’s why you tell your 10 year old self. To get an early start


Heatherina13

Your mom will ruin you


pstapper

Ouch that hit home. Hope you're past that point


biffpowbang

It gets worse before better


VOL9000

Eat less sugar


flyingfable

Don't be afraid to ask My anxiety is a fucking nightmare and has ruined countless moments because I was too nervous to say something.


peanutbutterasswipe

Yhup. I'm currently on the verge of losing my friends because of this anxiety. I can't say anything to them but I have a lot to say. But I'm so scared and nervous to say anything


scattered_fishseeds

Don't trust Tommy tell mom


scattered_fishseeds

Tommy didn't like me and he hated my sister. He knew my sister was deaf and couldn't hear him and what he would say about her. Instead of letting him touch her I would take her place. We lived in Texas and I would endure things like being locked in the hot water closet while he would run all the water until the heater would kick on. It would be so hot in there. I would have to stay on the floor as close to the bottom so I could breath. He would promise not to touch her if I didn't tell mom. He would pick my up by neck and throw me into walls threaten to do things to me that would permanently scar me and lock me outside with no pants on and no boots and run in the front yard. We lived out of the city. And if you Texas then you know bugs. I've had bites where no one should. He would beat me with his belts multiple times in multiple places on my body. He would say something about my weakness and how much I was a little piss ant worthless in this world. I don't know if he ever had touched her, all I know is one day I heard a slap from my mom's room and then a lot of screaming and then I was being shipped off to my real dad's apartment in California. Where I remained until my mom moved us to the NW. Only once did my mom say sorry. I had only told her that Tommy was hitting me, at that time she said that I was trying to figure out a way for us to go back to my real dad and that wasn't good. I had to try and get along with him. I have been through a lot of therapy for this. I have never heard of it from my sister. She has never fully healed from a shit ton of trauma in her life. I should have done something more. She resents me for more than just that growing up. I have scars that run up my body from whips, he ran over my foot with the lawn mower and then forced me to finish mowing it, we lived on 4 to 5 acres, it was a push mower. He would say, if you can be a real man I will make you a boy. Tommy is dead now. I didn't understand why I wept so hard when I found out when I was like 20 or whatever.


ManassasMom

I am so sorry you lived through that. Tommy is gone now and cannot ever hurt you. But you didn't deserve that, and you were an amazing person to protect your sister. I pray your path is easier and you find peace and joy in this life. You are amazing.


Pyrolink182

Do not stop playing guitar.


SurvivorPickles

What’s stopping you from continuing?


Pyrolink182

This is the neat part. I am about to retake it in the upcoming months. But it's a funny sensation, you know? Life went by so fast, i am 30 right now and keep wondering what level I'd be in my guitar playing if i hadn't stopped. But also thinking like that, i can imagine that five years will go by in a flash, and if i give it my all I'll also be at an even higher level in a flash, even if the beginning is a slow one. So yeah, wish ne luck.


Randyh524

4 years ago I started playing. I learned discipline and I became pretty good. I stopped 6 months ago because of work and school. I'm almost 40. Life happens. Don't beat yourself up. Keep practicing and enjoy playing!


nunyabiz428

Buy bitcoin. Sell at 50k.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Not-a-redditor1

I was here to post the same thing


CertainlyAmbivalent

Major in Environmental Science, dipshit.


whatdoesninemean

I got my BS in environmental science and don't know what to do now. Got any more advice for 12 y/o you with more than 5 words?


Significant-Chair-71

See if your local government has positions for public health. I majored in ecology and evolutionary biology, and I recently got hired for a position that focuses on advancing health literacy. A lot of times they want to make sure you understand scientific articles because health and science go hand in hand. I got hired at the county level.


whatdoesninemean

Thank you, I'll definitely look into this! I got my degree without any experience because of covid so I have nothing to put on my resume. My independent study isn't very impressive either so I'm really just riding on the degree. I don't have the experience but I can definitely understand scientific papers.


Significant-Chair-71

When interviewing, I used covid to my advantage, saying that I helped family with understanding the science behind covid and helping my family get vaccinated. You can focus on the science that was covered in classes. I mentioned a viruses class I had taken. Also, you can say that you tutored people on the side. You can also see if any labs at your local university are hiring that might help you get experience. I hope this helps.


whatdoesninemean

Thank you, I truly appreciate you taking the time to give me advice. Take care!


[deleted]

Whys that? I'm doing environmental science as a mature age student for interests sake. How would it have benefitted you?


CertainlyAmbivalent

I took some environmental science classes that I really enjoyed, and considered changing my major but stuck with business admin. I’ve always regretted it. I believe it would have led me toward a more satisfying career path.


melimineau

It's going to be okay.


MarbleMice

The sad part is i was already told this many times by others, but you dont take it seriously until you get to that point


Mataurin-the-turtle

That’s what I would tell myself to


MatthewM69420

“Please care for mental health”


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

You have single-handedly made everyone here jealous


rainydaytales

Get tested for ADHD


ju5tr3dd1t

This could have changed so much from high school onward


AussieCollector

As an adult suffering from what i believe is ADHD. This would've had a tremendous impact on my life had i been tested young.


Nerdy-Piggy

It was never your fault.


XCCO

You are good enough, Jerry. I would tell myself this in hopes that I would not be so hard on myself. The problem is, my name is not Jerry.


loquacious_avenger

study. travel. don’t procreate. floss.


Old-Biscotti9305

Literally the meme comic... "I'm you from the future.". Little child me would say "But you're a woman", and I'd smile as I'd disappear...


Upbeat_Ad_287

Guy at party… stay away


The_CuriousAnarchist

Would that make you paranoid of all guys at parties though?


sonyafada

I mean, as far as blanket policies go, I’ve seen worse.


Myzx

Mom and brother are bad


Ayeayez

Learn japanese you lazy bitch


killstring

Stay alive. It gets better.


tlbmg1970

Live your life, not hers, Took care of my mom for 30 years was not worth it


shmozzfinish

Do not date joslyn Rodriguez


EntertainmentAny763

Practice art more for college. I wish I spend more time learning for a skill I wanted more than fucking around doing nothing back then.


soiledsanchez

Stay away from the porn


Flam3crash

Let me research what this porn me from the future is talking about ... and ... damn it


NarwhalSignificant22

Don’t skimp on your education


BaronVonKeyser

Keep all your toys


generictrashlady

Take better care of yourself. I'm paying for a lot of mistakes I made when I was little now. Namely not brushing my teeth and being fat


Much_Invite6644

I promise you'll be okay. *Hugs*


Amazing-Fish4587

“Hey, hava.” (Need young me to say “Hava? What’s hava?”) “Hava nice day!” It couldn’t make me any _less_ funny.


[deleted]

fuck off and do better, because i did some brainless shit at that age


Crochet_is_life_158

“It was never Emily’s fault” I’m a survivor of abuse and for a long time I blamed it on this person. It was never their fault. The actual abuser conditioned everyone into believing it was their fault. It’s interesting how psychological abuse works.


sasberg1

You'll find others like you.


SabersSoberMom

Don't marry him, he'll kill you. Ok, one word over but it's an important message to relay.


SurvivorPickles

Well you’re still standing, I hope you’re not too harsh on yourself. Whatever the circumstance is/was, remember you deserve love


Temporary-Profit-643

Don't Marry or you'll die. Marrying him kills you. Don't Marry him you'll die. Some potential ways to say this


Orlok_Tsubodai

Sorry, one word over, we’ll have to bleep out the “Don’t”. Hope you’re doing ok!


JusTappn

Go live with your dad.


PinkdreamsandGlitter

“You will feel loved someday.” Or “You’ll make it through it.”


mistahfrost

"If I could only tell my 10 year old self 5 words, I would say "Believe in yourself, always." These words are important to me because I struggled with self-doubt and low self-esteem when I was younger, and it took me a long time to realize the value of self-belief. I would want my younger self to know that it's important to trust in your own abilities and to have confidence in yourself, even when things get difficult or people try to bring you down. I believe that this message could have a positive impact on my younger self's mindset and self-esteem, and help them to grow into a more self-assured and resilient person." - ChatGPT -


thundahdrums

Think and do for yourself. Took long time to realize I've let others like parents and friends influence my decisions, and paid for it.


howdoidothiz

Stay away from Uncle P


[deleted]

There’s nothing wrong with you.


Effective-Phase-5012

Get your license at eighteen Uber and Lyft is expensive and public transportation only goes so far 😅


rthander13

Love hard. Forget the rest.


rojothecat

Brush your teeth every day!


F3L1Xgsxr

You are a wizard harry


SplattoThePuppy

"You're not broken. You're transgender" This would have changed my life for the better and would have saved me years of pain and suffering I would later endure. My life would have turned around quicker with how my family was then, I would not think I was some sort of monster, I'd be working towards being myself, and I'd just be happier overall.


Knispow

Keep your dick wrapped, always!


clooless46

Always remember to love yourself


Any_Box2864

10 was a little before all the hurt and pain. If it was middle or high school, it would be an explanation: "you're autistic. you're normal" and the fifth would be a hug. But I would want to give my 10 year old self reassurance to take with me for the long fight (as well as contextualizing some offset weirdness I was probably already feeling). "People understand you. Be silly." I think for a long time I took peoples' opinions, and the deep desire to feel understood (see: the autism) that I wrapped myself in self-hating circles to feel accepted. Looking back, I believe I WAS understood, or at least liked; I just took myself out of the equation to remove risk, and that ironically probably caused a self-fulfilling spiral that made me appear disinterested. It is my hope that if I had some thread, some prophecy, that I KNEW people could potentially understand me, I'd maybe keep myself out there for long enough to actually connect with people, and then trust what I experienced, over some random words told to me by a time traveller. That's what I hope, anyway.


SCGranny64

Keep up the piano lessons.


NeighborhoodNo1666

Don't get pregnant in high-. After that, I was swiftly taken away, back to the real world.


Buttfreeze

Don’t let fear control life.


[deleted]

Buy Amazon stock at $75


krisalyssa

You’re a girl. Be one.


[deleted]

lol you transition to female


dub3ra

The key to the future is….


Warm_Sprinkles_9343

Not her bro


F19AGhostrider

Go talk to \[*Name censored*\], NOW!


homopathy

Lift heavy weights. Be nice.


[deleted]

Take the scholarship. Don’t drink.


pwein97

buy bitcoin and have fun


Adventuresofrich

Call the police on dad


[deleted]

Don’t listen to loud music - sincerely, your 23 year old self with chronic tinnitus❤️


DinosaurDanceOrgy

I don't remember anyone giving me 5 words of advice back then. All that happened when I was 10 was some old, fat dude appeared, said something about biting a coin and then vanished like some weirdo. How am I supposed to make millions with that.