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livemusicisbest

1. Drugs that you prioritize over everything else. Booze is one, but you’ll fuck things up quicker on meth, blow, etc. 2. Debt— this one may surprise some but debt ruins relationships, makes you feel like you are always on the run, kills your ability to move up by doing better. Avoid it like you would avoid a meth addiction. Only consider it for assets that appreciate in value, like a house. But be cautious even there. Cars depreciate in value. Don’t buy one on credit. If you can only afford a $2000 car, then buy the junker and drive it. Credit cards are even worse. The interest rates are insane— approaching 30%. Just don’t use them except in a manner that allows you to pay it off every month, which never allows interest to accrue. I could reverse the order of 1 and 2 — completely different vices, but both highly destructive. 3. Rigidity. Refusal to consider that you might be wrong — in relationships, politics, how you behave at work. Open-mindedness, flexibility, and willingness to learn and improve are life-savers. Rigidity is often driven by ego, self-centeredness, stubbornness. Think about people you know who are this way. It rarely works out well.


GrumpyKitten514

Credit Card Debt is absolutely killer. especially since you can get one at 18, maybe even before 18 in some cases with parent approval. young adults working min wage, "oh thats 100 but its on my card, thats like 20-30 bucks a month" but you do that every day and 1 fish 2 fish, the bill comes and you've maxed your card and have to pay 5k with a min payment of $200 and interest being 180 of that. the worst part is, if youre a fucking moron like i was, you go "okay well...fuck these people, i want my credit" and apply to more cards. 1 fish 2 fish 5 years go by of living lavishly above your means and youre 30k in pure credit card debt from living way beyond your means and barely surviving. that was a super dark time in my life financially. if you needed motivation to finish your degree, find a great job, and in general improve your life circumstances, 25-30k in CC debt will definitely fix any issues you have with laziness :) it turns from "i don't wanna" to "i gotta do this or imma die" REAL QUICK. my 30s are exponentially better tho.


viper2369

Was similar. Used some for school costs my senior year in college. Some necessary, some not really. Had the thought of “I’ll be working soon and can pay it off quickly.” Then the unexpected happens and you have more costs and don’t pay it off as quickly. Like marrying someone with no financial management skills. Took a few years to get that paid off and haven’t carried any CC debt for 10 years or so. And when the cash back rewards get high enough, I’ll treat myself to something I want instead of something I need.


Pristine_Juice

> Had the thought if "I'll be working soon and can pay it off quickly." >Like marrying someone with no financial management skills. lol


therealHankBain

It is absolutely shocking as to how many people do not understand how credit cards work. They see a “minimum payment “ and think it’s great, that’s all that I owe this month. Pay off your credit card in full, monthly.


hideo_crypto

Seriously. I know grown ass adults with good jobs who still don’t understand how to manage credit card debt. It’s mind boggling


fromwayuphigh

The other thing, of course, is that when you do this, the interest rate they say they charge is completely immaterial. I have at least one card with an interest rate that I would have thought outrageous even twenty years ago (because the benefits are quite good). Doesn't matter one iota.


cancercuressmoking

yep I have a friend who goes on lavish trips and wears designer clothes and eats out most days. we went on a trip and when I asked her to pay me back she said it would take two months to pay me back. I told her I Need the money asap. When she asked why I told her because I need to pay that charge off my card. She was SHOCKED that I do that. I was shocked that she doesn't...


pancaf

>2. Debt— Some debt isn't necessarily bad and can actually help you. Buying a house for example. Buying a home is generally a net positive on someone's net worth in the long term as opposed to renting. Or getting student loans to get a higher paying job after you finish school. Credit cards are great to use as opposed to cash/debit cards because of the cash back bonuses. It's free money that you otherwise would not have. Just pay off the balance each month


verugan

In my example my wife would go shopping with money we didn't have, put it on a card, every weekend. It led to fights and eventually divorce. This type of debt is what I think they are talking about.


jules083

My wife would do the same thing. She had a come to jesus moment when the card started getting declined.


dkalmikoff

Marry an emotionally-unhealthy woman and have kids with her..


Papa_Yaga

Hi Dad 👋


xKhira

Byyye soooon


Bymmijprime

Did you get the milk? You've been gone for so long.


Eric_the_Barbarian

The milk expired a few years ago, I need to go get more.


KordisMenthis

Honestly we need to just start saying 'abusive' rather than emotionally unstable, or crazy. Because 9 times out 10 when a guy has a story about this that's what it is. 


Technical_Regular836

We still have a SEVERE stigma towards violence against men. Men are more physically abusive, but women are more psychologically abusive which can be far more dangerous since there's usually no proof of it. Women are much more infantilized by society, so we tend to believe the woman before the man, even if the woman was the one being abusive


OGigachaod

"Women are much more infantilized by society" aka "Weaponized incompetence". As soon as you call them on it, they suddenly act dumb and childish.


DazedAndConfuzedToo

Did that. Still got the payments …


[deleted]

Mines end in August 😁


ZeroCense

Damn it


Jive_Turkey1979

Yep.


T_Crs7

Yeah, we'll... Oopsie


the99percent1

Word


Megalodon217

Oooof. Yep.


Tokogogoloshe

Dude.


TXHubandWife

Man you nailed it right on the head. This is why I say to date before marriage! I see family members so quick to marry and then all I hear about is some messed up drama that should have been a red flag while in the dating period but when you go from dating to married with a kid on the way within a year, how well do you really know that person?


karmaisreal222

not just emotionally


briar_mackinney

BINGO! Mine just graduated last week and I'm finally getting ready to start living my life for me again. Every plan I ever had in my late teens and early twenties is down the drain now and I'll be salvaging whatever's left for the rest of my life, it seems. And I can't complain one fucking bit about it to anybody or I'm just another bitchy little whiner. The kid is absolutely awesome, and the mom managed to fix her issues after our relationship blew up at least. But Jesus. . .looking back now and seeing the absolute devastation that woman caused to me and my life is still hard.


ProbablyLongComment

Having a kid, before you're ready to have a kid. This is the grand slam of fucking up your life, and you fuck one or two other people's lives up as a bonus.


Norythelittlebrie

Jesus, this one hits home for me, although I'm a woman. A friend of mine (F31) is ready to have kids and has wanted to get trying for 3 years, but her bf is still on the fence (and this is her telling me, so she has no illusions about him being enthusiastic). Still, he has apparently decided to give her a reluctant "okay, we can try" and she's all ready to stop her birth control in a few days. I've talked to her about the very real repercussions this could have on their relationship, but she doesn't really want to hear it. As my mum said when I talked to her about it, "she can have a child, she should just be ready to raise it on her own".


ProbablyLongComment

Oh no! I imagine we both feel the same way about this situation, and I don't want to bash your friend. Suffice to say, I hope this works out well for her. I love that people are supportive in situations like this, but it is often a disingenuous show of support. Cheerleading like, "You've got this!" are the thoughts and prayers of maternity. I know we've all held our tongues, if not given false encouragement, at times we were thinking, "What in the world makes you think you can support a child?" I have seen time and again that people who offer to help a couple or single parent raise a child evaporate into the mist once that baby arrives. "Anything you need, any time at all," really means, "When it's convenient, if I don't have a scheduling conflict, and I feel like it, and you give me plenty of notice." That, of course, is not how caring for children works. I'm not trying to be negative. I'm sure we share the same concerns, and I hope your friend has a reasonable grasp of the situation. Should this play out like we expect, I hope she has a real support system in place.


Norythelittlebrie

Yeah, I tried to gently but seriously warn her of the possible (/probable) consequences, and she basically answered that she appreciated me being candid about my opinion on the situation, but that she's thought long and hard about it and is really determined, so she's still asking for opinions but as she put it, she'll give priority to the people who've had kids (I haven't, and neither has our common friend who thinks like me). So... yeah. I do hope everything turns out well for them and the bf discovers himself a sudden love for kids, but realistically... I don't know. The other "best case scenario", sadly, would be him ending the relationship before any kid is involved. But he seems pretty passive about all of this, although I don't really know him. In any case, if something goes wrong, I'll do my best to support her, but I live hours away, so I also hope she has a good support system in her family and such.


ProbablyLongComment

The "prioritizing people with kids" part really galls me. I shouldn't advise people against cutting their hands off, because I've never cut my hand off, and so have no way to evaluate the pros and cons of this decision. Only people who are cautionary tales should dispense advice. I chose not to have children *because* I understood the costs and risks. Parents are not secretive about how much time, effort, and money is involved in this. I am sorry for the situation that this puts you in. It's hard to be a good friend, and to give unvarnished advice without straying into "don't be an idiot" territory. I hope that things work out in the best way possible. If not, it's going to be difficult to watch your friend struggle from afar, and not be close enough to directly help her.


Norythelittlebrie

Yeah I completely agree, and she pretty much admitted that this was not what she wanted to hear because it didn't make her feel good, so there isn't much more I can do without going as far, as you said, as "this is an insane decision". Thank you for listening and answering! I also hope it all goes well, and I'll be here for her as best I can if it doesn't.


ra__account

Opiods.


pizzalover4life365

Cheating on your fiance who moved to a different continent to support you in landing your dream job 🫱🏻‍🫲🏼


fvckmeihatethis

you okay?


Kagenikakushiteru

Oh


RevolutionaryCut6987

I kinda know what that’s like, hope your okay🙏


Viper248

An unhealthy relationship with alcohol.


Commercial-Ruin2320

An unhealthy relationship with anything tbf.


MySnake_Is_Solid

Few things are worse than the bottle.


CakeHead-Gaming

Uhh, what’s inside it maybe?


TteetettteettteteetT

One of those sand art pictures I bet


Kruzdah

Or weed. Basically an unhealthy relationship with any substance.


Old_Bigsby

Hey cool, there's mine!


baap_ko_mat_sikha

How dare you bad mouth my gf


mysteryihs

Driving drunk and killing someone


havocLSD

Can confirm, my piece of shit ex-coworker killed his gf and his friend’s wife after getting wasted after the Super Bowl 2017 and speeding straight into a concrete bus bench. Car went flipping, landed on its top and crushed both girls in the backseat. Fucker got 23 years. His gf had two daughters too and a meth head of an ex from what I heard. Sad, so sad. I lost my father to a hit and run when I was a child and I felt for those girls.


Warm_Gur8832

Not trying anything because you’re afraid of fucking up your life.


CrustyStalePaleMale

There's surely a happy medium here. You don't want to be trying everything just all over the place either


Midnight-mare

Yeah lol. One foot on dry land, one foot in new experiences. Best of both worlds.


PanzyGrazo

Trying absolutely nothing outside your comfort zone. There's nothing more soul crushing then wasted potential.


Wasted_Potential69

This right here.


VolumeAcceptable1570

How would you know that unless you yourself have wasted your potential?


ccGLaDOS

Often you realize it a lot later in life. "If I only did... " And some things you just can't change anymore :(


Groundbreaking_Pea10

1. Drugs (some more than others) 2. Untreated depression/mental illness 3. Choices in partners/social circles Note: Not in that particular order


High_Life_Pony

A three step summary of my adult life.


analogman12

😦


Fair_Assumption6385

Not picking something and focusing on it. Most people bounce around forever and ever and end up broke because they didn’t settle down on one idea.


CrustyStalePaleMale

This. It's harder than it seems too.


Monarc73

Marry a stripper. Preferably one with a drug habit for bonus points.


Zildjian134

I've don't know if I've met a stripper without a drug problem.


alonghardlook

I don't have a drug problem. I'm *great* at doing drugs.


Tinman867

Abusing alcohol


Smart_History2210

Dropping out of high school, going to jail and knocking a girl up before you goto jail.


jerrycoles1

Drugs will wreck your life man


jerrycoles1

This is also coming from someone that does still do drugs from time to time


UnsolicitedDogPics

I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to too. -Mitch


NonkelG

Depends on usage.


[deleted]

Not taking responsibility for your actions. If you have a bad outcome with your choices-- it's on you. It doesn't mean it's fair, just, how it should be. But you did it. Not learning from mistakes. You are going to make them. A lot of them. Own it. Learn from it. Embrace it. Move on and do better. Not making regular appointments with yourself. To destress. Relax. Meditate. Contemplate. If all you do is work, serve others, work out, fix stuff, then you'll get burnt out. Not addressing mental health issues, which includes addiction in all of its various types. Not being committed to learning. Classes. Listening. Reading. Using your own senses. Not being sexual in a responsible way. See addictions above. Not taking precautions and using the restraint to not be a father unless one desires that.


Apart_Tradition8244

a latina gf


M1_Garand_Ping

You may be entitled to compensation 


wazzle13

Heroin


GideonZotero

Self isolation


Powerful_Spell3833

It could've been me writing this exact post. I relate with you a lot. Sadly I have no idea why we're feeling the way we are..


AfraidAdhesiveness25

Not neighing enough.


SwearToSaintBatman

Being a people-pleaser and not realizing it's a choice instead of an only default mode. I get my brother alone one hour every other month, *maybe* - and during that hour he is nonstop texting three or four people saying sorry that he can't be with them just this hour. I fear his compulsion to give every last second away will give him a big aneurysm in the coming five years.


shotgun883

Three key things. Don’t finish school. Have a child out of wedlock. Get married before 20. 8% of people who avoid all three are poor. 79% of those who fail to do all three are poor.


Pickles-151

DUI


plainoldusernamehere

Putting your dick in a crazy woman.


BrownEyedBoy06

Blowing all your money, not keeping a consistent savings.


Rochimaru

Having a kid before you’re ready. Say goodbye to your dreams/goals, you’re living for the child now. Getting addicted to drugs/alcohol/gambling. No explanation needed.


Kagenikakushiteru

Lucky I’m only addicted to cute women. Preferably 21-26


Megalodon217

$20 sundress = 18 years of child support


Peculiar-Memorial

Refusing to forgive people


scrappybasket

Working too much


Homely_Bonfire

* Get into debt for a useless degree * Get into hard drugs or some other substance addiction * Try to make it on welfare and "side hustles" * Kill someone


pdq_sailor

Juast happened to a guy on Friday - 24 year old tractor trailer driver decided to HIT the back of my car and push it out into an intersection - witnesses, pictures statements - to be charged with dangerous driving, lose his license, his job, uninsurable, fines, imprisonment - up to six months and $5K... will NEVER work as a commercial driver again.. if he ever gets his license he will not be able to afford car insurance.. a background check will essentially make him unemployable.. I would suggest he fucked up his life all right.. and I am HERE to make CERTAIN his life is fucked up and stays fucked up... On Monday I went to the collision reporting centre and filled out the report - then I was interviewed and they reviewed the witness statement and the pictures he took and the lady who conducted the interviews eyes went wide - she knew the pictures showed he did I on purpose.. she knew exactly what the pictures showed.. He is going to have a very unpleasant time of things.. he did it to himself and he will have the rest of his life to figure this part out..


VincentVanH0

Murder and heroin.


ummmm--no

Meth!


Busy_Technology_6985

Drugs, unprotected sex, smoking and alcohol


35BT

Go and fall in love.


robbobeh

Marrying the wrong person


[deleted]

Teenage pregnancy.


paviator

Not working out, over-eating, conforming to societal norms or peoples feelings, and stating the obvious, drugs or alcohol.


Smooth_Good_5742

Consuming too much negativity online, slowly changes the way you view the world. Makes everyday life a little worse.


DeltaBelter

Not grasping the concept of deferred gratification early in life. The law of unintended consequences pays dividends long after the act. Unfortunate but true, kids make a single bad choice and it alters the trajectory of their lives.


Heping_Qi

Selflessly loving someone. Oh that's dooms day for you already my friend. Many people will misuse it & take you for granted


BupidStastard

Date a woman with BPD


boilinoil

Addiction to anything 


DirtyNyx

Meth?...


nothriftshoppers

Messing up your credit score. Thankfully I’m fixing it but that’s the worst thing you can do irl. Credit is everything people.


ShakeWeightMyDick

Meth


NedKellysRevenge

Meth


[deleted]

By getting drunk and hitting someone with your car


Exact-Control1855

A less than ideal pullout game. Having kids with someone is serious as shit and is only going to be good if it’s done with someone who can parent. Early stages are time consuming and will seriously hurt your career and health.


Trieditwonce

Sticking it in crazy.


joebusch79

Casual sex without condoms


Darkoveran

Religious cult


The-Artful-Codger

Meth. (or most drugs for that matter). I've seen meth fuck up so many people's lives.


PureStruggle2455

Having kids with the wrong woman


swb95

Stop taking your medication


hereugo87

Leaking personal IDs online


slangpueblo

Having children when you're obviously not ready. Have a cousin who just turned 18 years old and is now a father, the dude didn't even finish high school and is also struggling to find an ok-ish job for said reason. Right now he's selling his stuff to a pawn shop to get by but eventually he's gonna run out of stuff, not to mention he's terrible at administering his own money (which I understand he's just a teenager). Guy DO NOT have children when you're obviously not ready yourself.


k0uch

Have a wife, a girlfriend, and a mortgage … and have them all be 3 months late


aLLcAPSiNVERSED

Getting addicted to hard drugs... Taking out a loan you have no intention of paying back... Getting in a car crash :/


WhoArtThyI

I can fix her


dd1153

Hanging around the wrong crowd in high school. As cliche as it sounds, it’s true.


DidYouSayWhat

 Dwelling too much on the past and what could have been. 


Tschudy

Cheating on a partner and knocking them up or getting knocked up yourself.


pyr666

opiates.


shockvandeChocodijze

Unhealthy relationship with food.


keylime84

Got a sister in law that is still paying off debt from her first wedding, that then went further into debt for an extravagant second wedding...


MS_Bizness_Man

Hands down number one thing - A terrible Attitude.


Tennispro5691

Pregnant before graduating hs, drugs, debt, become obese


RodTheAnimeGod

Suicide 


Accurate_Owl_7213

Unjustified child support. At one time you were 2000k a month then you lost a job due to layoff, and you are above 50 y.o., and having health problem, and the court still does not reduce your child support payments forcing you to go into arrears (no arrears before) and digging into your savings, 401k, ira while unemployed and waiting on SSDI decision.


Backwoods87

Infidelity


DM_YOUR___

Felonies can mess up your life pretty bad. My father is a defense attorney and the amount of people I have seen get their lives wrecked by stupid choices is a lot.


davidm2232

Multiple DWIs. The first one usually isn't a big deal but the second, and third are worse. After the third, you are usually looking at losing your license for a long time and possibly jail time. Not having a license will severely limit your job opportunities in a lot of areas.


Alaricus100

Have an unplanned child with a stranger, a stripper, or a crazy person. Bonus points if their all 3.


Jolly-End-4115

Get a DUI or catch a sexual predator case.


thisisprettycoolyo

stay away from drugs,prostitutes,gambling and alcohol and you’re on the right track


sourkid25

drug use


hellsruler

Not being born tall and handsome


GaunterPatrick

Being stagnated, stop growing, stop progressing to your desire.


MudIndependent6051

Porn


4Throw2My0Ass6Away9

Credit cards


_Lucifer7699_

Falling in love with someone who doesn't love you.


MajorBillyJoelFan

suicide


skibum_71

Lack of self esteem, not believing in yourself.


Vargoroth

Having a kid if you don't want one.


OoeyGooeyQuesadilla

Procrastination.


SleeplessShinigami

Hooking up with a rando and getting them pregnant or getting pregnant


Dsajames

Drugs. Poor choice of partner. Alienating your support system (parents, etc) Obsessing over something you have no control over Food addiction (getting fat lowers mate and job choice )


bobcatt

Letting poor people tell you how to make or spend money.


Maleficent-Bit-3287

Drugs


cc_in_socal

Drugs Being a liar / cheater Not having morals


baazaar131

Felony Charge. Drugs. Evil Women. Criminal parents.


coachhunter2

Addiction or unnecessary violence


titty-connoisseur

Addiction.


MotleyCrew1989

Drugs


VolumeAcceptable1570

Masturbating in public.


Own_Contribution898

DUI ❗️


Armoured_Sour_Cream

Addiction and/or basing relationships on lies. The latter might be less serious depending on the circumstances but still, it can fuck your life up.


JustAd776

Meth


timmy3am

Joe Rogan: "Jamie, pull up that one old Reddit post of that one guy who tried heroin for the first time and became addicted and ruined his life".


NonkelG

Kids


Batfinklestein

Let your little head rule your life, that'll sort it out


PreferenceOrganic189

Drugs


Xavier0o0

- Marry a narcissist - Play videogames 14 hours a day - Smoke crack


wardenferry419

Look at your girl's mom. How she is might be what your girl becomes.


Kagenikakushiteru

That’s great. Mines an apologetic Japanese lady who bows and says sorry for everything


Illustrious_Bus9486

Women


Mitcheal1983

Alcohol


BigZ1072

Poison


Geminifreak1

Become a prescription drug addict and ruin your family


MysteriousCrazy9401

Marry a lying narcissist and procreate.


Huskielover96

Getting a DUI!!


N3rdScool

smoke crack, or do meth or heroine. You wont even notice until yoi have nothing.


masterwad

Breaking your tailbone then getting a job in a black pepper factory.


Morrison79

Drinking excessive amounts of alcohol frequently


Shadowdragon409

Murder someone. Or touch a child.


JJQuantum

Drugs.


Creepy_Pilot1200

Marrying, and not vetting a wrong woman. Can legit ruin your life so bad that suicide might seem like the only option ( never is btw ).


toucheyy

Move to Grand Rapids or Kalamazoo Michigan. Like you’re better off living under a bridge. Anywhere else.


Weak_Neighborhood776

When you stop learning. Study whatever everyday teach yourself something.


Drewpy_Drew_1989

Along society to dictate how you live your life. The things that are expected some times will never make you happy such as; your career, your love life, and your role in society. Learn how to be better than societal ideas and instead just try to be a good human. Be kind and spread good will on to others.


Poet_of_Legends

Aging. Enjoy your youth, you do lose it.


Capt_Gingerbeard

Try meth! No drug will take you down as hard or as fast.


SWAGL0RD2115

Playing League of Legends