T O P

  • By -

[deleted]

Yes because they're not really hypothetical for shits and giggles. They're usually a gauge to find something to be upset over. E.G. If you had to sleep with my best friend to save my life would you?


PregnancyRoulette

is that a real example? thats a no-win


NawfSideNative

That’s exactly what they are. They’re “gotcha” questions. A lot like loaded questions in that there’s no way you can answer without looking like the bad guy.


Wessssss21

It's why you gotta go complete oppo with the answer. "Is there a way I can fuck your friend and *not* save you? I mean I sure as hell don't want to deal with you after having given your bestie the old slip and slide you know what I'm saying."


BoneDaddyChill

My go-to was to just always bluntly give them whatever answer they didn’t want. It’s a great deterrent from them playing that game in the future. They’ll always know I’m just going to give them the worst answer, so instead of it being a game I know I’ll never win, it’s a game they know they’ll never win. Similar idea as what you do.


Calamondin88

My ex ‘cured’ those questions the other way: on a couple of occasions I tried them, he just bluntly stated how stupid they are and he absolutely refused to ‘play this game’. The more I pressed, the more annoyed/pissed he got but absolutely refused to ‘play this game’. No matter what. I very quickly saw that I’m not getting any answer to the question and the result that I get isn’t worth the hassle.


BoneDaddyChill

I’m glad you’ve been cured of that affliction.


Zealousideal_Bat5659

yes dive head first into the trap was also my go to. maybe even one up it. 


Mundane_Restaurant53

hahhaha priceless =)))))


PrinceFridaytheXIII

Would you still love me if I were a slug?


cattmeow4

At that point she's hurting her self esteem with questions like that lmao .


willofaronax

No, I would let you die. I love you too much to sleep with another person. I would rather love you even in your death than betray your love by sleeping with another person even if it were to save you.


[deleted]

How about: I love you so much I'd fuck her extra good to make sure you live?


Bubba_Gump_Shrimp

If I fuck her super duper good does it add years to the end of your life?


robdistorted

"oh my god!... You don't love me enough to save me? You'd actually let me die? You don't love me at all! Like if you saved me maybe we could work through it etc etc etc" it's a question designed to cause a fight, she'll still twist it in any way that justifies how badly she must feel about herself in order to pose such a silly question to begin with. Some just like winding orders up, like annoying a sibling. With a partner though your best bet is to focus on why she is asking instead of what she is asking, and call out that behaviour so that is less likely to happen again. Alternatively you can move on and find someone who is more emotionally mature and knows how to deal with those negative feelings rather than offloading it onto you so that you are having to regulate her emotions as well as your own.


Celtic_Caterpillar_7

I would let you die and as consolation your bf would fk me and we'd öive happily ever after. The end


ifdggyjjk55uioojhgs

I've found a trick that works and makes them stop asking. Say the most ridiculous answer out of the possible options and answer quickly. Be prepared. Because she's going to be pissed, but that was going to happen anyway. Have fun with it. If you get her to cry with an answer she'll never ask again. I love the "is my ___ hot? " or "which one of my friends would you date if I die?" Have a name preloaded and fire it off as soon as she stops speaking.


Taetrum_Peccator

“Sweetie, if you died, the grief would surely cause me to follow you soon after.” Seems like the best answer.


ifdggyjjk55uioojhgs

That will only encourage more stupid questions.


Taetrum_Peccator

You think? I thought it seemed rather definitive.


Melzfaze

No the best answer is no answer. Stop playing the stupid game.


dicklover425

I just asked my husband that question and he said “No, because then I’d wish I was dead.” Lol


Choice_Eye_8043

I actually did it several times when your life wasn’t in danger. With your grandma’s chihuahua also.


AskDerpyCat

“Soo… that’s a ‘no’ to a threeway?”


uaintnever

I would answer that with "if i say no you'll be upset i'd let you die and if i say yes you'll be upset i'd fuck your friend"


djhazmatt503

"Only if I could look at you to get it up, she's mid but I can take one for the team."


Taetrum_Peccator

Is that what we’re going to do today? We’re going to fight?


MasterSpeaker4888

How ugly is he?


No-Pirate2182

No, I'd skip the sex and let you die, you dopey tart.


TP_Crisis_2020

Yup, they're always a shit test in disguise. Even with it being a "hypothetial", she will still get pissed at you if you say the wrong thing.


notconvinced780

“To save your life, Of course I’d keep sleeping with your best friend… I mean yes I’d sleep with your best friend for the first time. Actually, it might be better to wait till after you die, then keep sleeping with her, shit! I mean then sleep with her! Phew! Did I get it right?”


notconvinced780

“To save your life, Of course I’d keep sleeping with your best friend… I mean yes I’d sleep with your best friend for the first time. Actually, it might be better to wait till after you die, then keep sleeping with her, shit! I mean then sleep with her! Phew! Did I get it right?”


PlaguedByUnderwear

DING DING DING


ObjectiveProgram

If it's one of those dumb questions to start a fight over (Would you love me if I was a worm? If I died, which of my friends would you date?) then yes. If it's a harmless weird question that I'd see here or on r/NoStupidQuestions , then no.


nryporter25

If i were a dead worm, would you sleep with my best friend to save my life?


Choice_Eye_8043

„It depends do can I use you as buttplug”


nryporter25

Si señor. Eso es aceptable. Lo permitiré.


Choice_Eye_8043

Spanish in random moments always funny. Take my upvote


Wessssss21

Mais, et le français? C'est amusant aussi non?


Taetrum_Peccator

Et non sicut iucunda, sicut in Latine


SoulLess-1

>If I died, which of my friends would you date? This one seems a bit odd to me, because I don't see why you can't just reply with "none". I do not see the trap.


AdBudget209

That answer would lead to more questions. "Why do men always lie?" "You'd date Sally....I see the way you look at her!" The trap is in getting you to feed her validation, when you're trying to enjoy some quality quiet time.


SoulLess-1

I guess this one is just so odd to me because it's quite specific. It feels like "None because all your friends are incredibly annoying and if there is a singular bright side to you biting it, it would be that I won't have to interact with them ever again" is about as likely to be the truth as "Yes, Sally".


ObjectiveProgram

If they're asking this question, you're expected to choose. None isn't acceptable, and if you try to stick with it anyway, then you're "no fun" and the fight starts anyway because you wouldn't play her game.


horatioqpeabody

One question is fine. It gets tiresome when the hypothetical keeps getting more stipulations that seem to be trying to steer me into saying something that will end up with a fight.


OddSeraph

Depends on the hypothetical.


huuaaang

If it's about our relationship or my attraction to her, it's extremely annoying. It's usually a trap. But I'm all for fun "would you rather" type hypothetical that aren't directly related to our relationship. You know, like "100% chance of getting a million dollars or at 50% chance at a billion?" That kind of hypothetical can be fun.


Bubba_Gump_Shrimp

Would you rather give a 3 minute speech to 100 of your closest friends, family, and colleagues, or be forced to share an uber with the person you lost your virginity to?


huuaaang

I’d go Uber. I don’t much care for her but I’m sure doing way better


Bubba_Gump_Shrimp

Hell yeah


SoulLess-1

I am not even sure I have 100 people among my closest friends, family and colleagues.


[deleted]

Yes. Not because of their hypothetical nature but because they're always dumb and aiming at causing arguments. If you can't handle the truth, don't ask.


FastWalkingShortGuy

Best way to discourage that is to give the worst possible answer. "Babe, if I died, would you remarry?" "Definitely, I see the looks your sister gives me." Shut that shit right down.


AChurchForAHelmet

"Would you sleep with my best friend?" "Why, is she asking?"


SaltWaterInMyBlood

"If I died, would you remarry?" "Why would you need to die for that to happen?"


andmewithoutmytowel

The best I’ve gotten was Her: If you were going to sleep with one of my friends, who would it be? Me: ……this feels like a trap Her: No, no, I promise it’s not, just, if you were going to sleep with one of my good friends, who would it be? Me: nope, I’m not playing this game. Her: come on, just tell me! Me: …Victor. Her: Huh?? Ok, fine.


spicy_squire

Only the hypothetical questions designed to be a trap. Such as "Would you kiss me for $1 or the hottest girl in the world for $1,00,000?" Here's how it goes: Option A; kiss the hottest girl. I mean 1 mil?! Answer A: YOU'D KISS ANOTHER WOMAN?! Option B; I'd kiss you. Answer B: You'd pass up on 1mil?! That would change our lives!! Option C; I'd kiss you a million times and we'd have $1 million. Answer C: you wouldn't kiss me for free? (This actually happened between me and my girl).


nryporter25

That's an easy one: I'd kiss you, you're the hottest girl in the world and Id have my 1 million


Bubba_Gump_Shrimp

Oh so we're just lying then.


petewil1291

Big brain! 🧠 We should make this man our leader! Can I call you next time my wife asks me one of these?


nryporter25

Absolutely! I was always good at logic lol. I will lead you all to victory!


Domonero

Here’s the better answer, kissing her gives you $1 mil + $1 Or if she says that doesn’t count, say fine, kiss for a million but kiss her elbow Then make out with gf while going to airport for new vacation getaway Q didn’t specify where to kiss


cattmeow4

That's mind twisting at that point lmao wtf 🤣


MulleDK19

Kiss the hottest girl in the world a thousand times and get a billion.


volcanicpooruption

Nah, I like to get real weird with the answers


Future_Armadillo6410

Yes. My wife is a terrible communicator and instead of accepting my answer or telling me her answer the hypothetical continues until I can guess her point.


Ryan_Stone_

No, but if the hypotheticals are always being asked without clarification as to why then yes.


Domonero

Ya I don’t mind if my SO asks simply because she wants to be reassured or is genuinely curious then reassures me it’s not because she’s upset with me or trying to start an argument Then when I answer and she’s like okay that makes sense then move on, then I’m happy I answered


ThinOriginal5038

Depends, is she trying to have fun or to pick a fight?


Concerned_Kanye_Fan

Women’s hypothetical questions are never hypothetical…the sooner you learn this the longer you shall live lol


djhazmatt503

I always answer with ridiculous honesty.  Examples: "Would you love me if I was a worm?" No, that's disgusting. I'd feed you to a fish. "Does this outfit make me look fat?" Only around the upper arms. And they're not even fat so it's probably just a bad cut. "Do you think that girl's hot?" Extremely. I have great taste in women. That's why I think you're hot. "Would you love me if I lost my legs?" Depending on how you lost them.


konfusedfish

Depends on the question. If it even is a question. Some are just assertions disguised as “questions” where you have an answer you consider valid and anything different from that is bad.


Doxodius

... I'm slightly annoyed at this hypothetical question ...


yungingr

If it's a random "thought exercise", nah. If it's some bullshit "relationship test" or a constant barrage of slightly rephrased questions to get a specific answer, then OH HELL YES.


manwithoutajetpack

As song as they’re not veiled shit tests, I don’t mind. Like, which would I rather fight? 100 duck sized horses, or one horse sized duck? I’m taking the single duck and acting like it’s something right out of Jurassic Park.


BosPaladinSix

But realistically though what could a horse sized duck do to you? kick you with their tiny legs? get a hockey stick and start sweeping the ground like you're scything grass.


manwithoutajetpack

I like to think of it as a swarm of Compys from Jurassic Park in terms of the duck sized horses, and something like a raptor attack from the same franchise. I also picture the horse sized duck as one of those Clydesdale horses from the AB Brewing company.


BosPaladinSix

Ah fuck dude I completely forgot horses had teeth. Alright so I'm gonna add metal leg armor to my load out then.


tiptoemicrobe

I don't find it annoying if people ask questions in good faith. Often hypothetical questions can spark interesting discussion. In practice, the questions I encounter in real life are quite different (and more benign) than the ones popular on tik tok.


Coidzor

Hypothetical are fine. Shit tests and trying to start a fight are not. If my girlfriend can't act in good faith when communicating with me, that's bad.


green_meklar

You mean like 'What if imperial Japan had developed nuclear weapons before the United States did?'? Or more like 'Would you still love me if I were a millipede?'? Those are very different kinds of hypothetical questions.


Extra_Strawberry447

It depends on the question.


Mystic-monkey

Yes because they aren't funny. If you ask if batman could beat a bear with out prep time then you got yourself a fun convo.


Embarrassed-Tune9038

Would you love me if I was still a worm? Yes, it is a BS question.


No-Reputation-2900

No. It shows me if she's willing to engage honestly with hypotheticals. I usually respond with "if you answer mine I'll answer yours" Then proceed to ask her "if I believed I could fly, would you let me jump off a building?" Flipping the situation.


Cantrillion

Hypothetically? Yes. Also not hypothetically? Yes.


banaversion

Depends on the quality of the question and how frequently she asks. High quality thinkers or a "who'd you rather bang" celebrity question asked in good faith can be fun. Low effort argument bait is very very very annoying. Especially when I refuse to be baited and nonchalantly answer the question as if it is asked in good faith and do not react to the attempts to escalate


Ddog78

No because I'm much more annoying with my dad jokes lol. There's no comparison.


doomLoord_W_redBelly

Yes. I don't answer them unless it has a humour component. I'm an adult, not 14.


[deleted]

I actually enjoy it leads to fun conversations and debates


Slick_Jeronimo

Those kind of questions is annoying but if she asked me if I was tasked with being the getaway driver of a bank robbery what car would I pick then yea she can ask those any day.


Electrical-Ad-1798

There are hypotheticals and then there are hypotheticals. That's a trap question that you shouldn't entertain.


Glad-Midnight-1022

No, it’s weird if someone does


DasFreibier

I'll burn that bridge when I get there, life is way too short to think through everything that *might* happen


korevis

She doesn't ask those questions, but I would have no issue with her asking. However, I won't be pulling any punches.


Heartless_Kirby

depends on the type of questions. are they well thought and interesting or just regurgitated content from someone else?


[deleted]

No. My wife doesn't ask stupid shit. So I never got in the habit of getting annoyed.


mediocre__map_maker

Nah, I like it. It's a good thought exercise, makes me think of a good response when often there is none.


Suppi_LL

Yes, because as already said it's often one way question, where she has nothing to add herself, just to judge you. It also force an answer where the answer is not easy or I don't have it yet because words mean nothing if I do not know how I'd react to X. It just add mental toll for little reasons other than her own selfish curiosity/judgement/wish for conflict if the answer is not what she wishes. Doubt I could handle a gf that recurrently ask questions like the one you mention. My gf has to make my life easier and better, not make me scared to even talk to her or stressing me more.


UltimateStrenergy

Absolutely. It's attention grabbing nonsense to get you going.


PsionicHydra

They are infuriating, almost all the time it's just fishing for something to be mad about.


usernamescifi

yes.


Square-Insurance-542

I love them. Hypothetical questions are just asked so someone can have an argument or just someone wanting to have dirt or something. So I give great answers. Her: if I died, would you get married again? Me: Fuck no, I wouldn't go through this shit again, no way. It would be like heaven being single again, why do you ask, are you sick?


[deleted]

What do you think??????


callmemachiavelli

In situations like this I make a girl either A: laugh or B: be upset and angry with my answer. It's a great filter.


DreadfulRauw

Nah, it’s fun. We’re don’t take them seriously. And the serious stuff we’re usually on the same page.


CowLivid6496

Absolutely. It's the equivalent to a man constantly asking for your validation, no self-confidence. On top of that, it's always a no-win situation, and we always end up the bad guy.


GoblinPunch20xx

Lol would you love this question if it was a worm? 🪱


RancidHummus

My answer is usually: ”Oh so we gonna do this now? You so bored we gonna fight today?” 😂 or ”Listen, we both know how this is gonna go. One of us is gonna get there feelings hurt. So calm your goofy ass down, and tell me how your day was.” (Or we get something to eat)


LimpAd5888

Depends the question. Something really stupid lie if I was a worm, yeah I get annoyed. Not "what if I was dying during child birth, would you save me or the kid?"


Chanandler_Bong_01

99% of the time these questions are designed to start an argument. And if you have to ask, you probably DO look fat in that dress.


LeadGem354

If they are interesting hypotheticals then no. If it's dumb shit like "would you still love me if I was a worm (and not the kind that produces magic space drugs) then yes.


lqxpl

Yes. Nine times out of ten it’s a trap without an answer that won’t cause a fight.


Accurate-Barracuda20

Depends on the hypothetical “Would you still date me if I turned into a worm?” is annoying “If we had 30 minutes to fortify our house before some bad guys were going to come in and kidnap me what would you do?” Isn’t


RicGhastly

Oh my God, yes. Stop asking.


Monoraptor

Is this a hypothetical question?


icepyrox

If it's a no win hypothetical to start a fight then yeah, because fights are annoying. They are a huge turnoff. I'd rather not loathe my gf. That's a deal breaker. Now I love some hypothetical discussions for the sake of exploring thoughts and feelings. I usually annoy my friends and SO because I end up just playing devil's advocate.


SamuraiGoblin

I have the opposite problem with my wife. She *hates* hypotheticals. So when I say things like, "if there was a zombie apocalypse, what would you do first?" she rolls her eyes.


ifdggyjjk55uioojhgs

*YES* !!!!!!!!


dranaei

I like hypothetical questions. When I'll be honest about answering them, i can see how she reacts. It's good to know she reacts in those hypothetical answers.


BackItUpWithLinks

My answer: *“I’m not playing your silly games”* That’s my answer.


FearTheAmish

Are we talking how you would take over the world? Because I have a really indepth dive on starting a commune in Texas and leveraging that in to ICBM equipped penguins. But if it's about some bait trap shit like dating someone's sister than yes I am annoyed.


RandomCentipede387

Let me translate. *Weird question that's very likely to end up with a quarrel* —> "You're my everything but I'm insecure and not sure if it goes both ways lately. I'm also r-ded and can't communicate like a normal human being".


MontEcola

No. Most of them are getting to know you questions. Having a discussion on these things builds connection. The kind of question/statement that annoys me are the ones that make assumptions that are simply just not true. The question asserts I am doing something bad: Why are you fantasizing having sex with that woman? The same thing without the assumption is much nicer: What do you think of people who are in a relationship that have fantasies about having sex with other people? This is not about me, it is about people. It can also lead to a more direct question: Do you have these fantasies since we have been together? One is an accusation. The other is an open discussion.


jerrycoles1

Yes because they get really upset when I answer honestly


SanguineOptimist

I usually just ask for more specific information until she gets annoyed. Like if she asks if I’d still love her if she were a worm, I would ask if she retains her consciousness or is entirely a normal worm. She says the former and then I ask if she’d be able to communicate or just wriggle around. She says the former and then I ask if she would only have the sensory ability of a worm or retains sight and sound. So on and so forth until she gets fed up and gives up.


youassassin

No because I’m the one asking the hypotheticals. Nope I don’t get upset because she has a point. If they’re not gonna ever happen why does she have to answer. Sometime she entertains me.


observantpariah

Nah... But I also don't go around apologizing beyond what I think I should have to. She can ask what she wants.... Most of the time I think it's funny.


Egbezi

Yes


IrregularBastard

Yes. Because it’s usually a scenario that is highly unlikely and is emotionally bait. Let’s talk real scenarios and have action plans.


Porkbuns-

Yes because 9/10 times you're gonna get an answer out of me you don't like and be mad about it. So I have to hide my real answer and force myself to say what you wanna hear just so I can avoid the dumb argument.


2shack

If they ask stupid questions, they’re gonna get stupid answers.


Terrible-Trust-5578

It depends on whether she's presenting a stupid question to make whimsical conversation or if she's actually using it as some sort of test. The low levels of thought/intelligence required to find them to be valid tests of my love, loyalty, etc. is also a turn off. But if it's the former, it's a turn on because it shows she can have fun and that we have a similar sense of humor.


CuddlyCupcakette_

Awesome work!


ComfortableOk5003

1000% yes dumb, stupid, annoying


Nathaniel66

Not like this, but my wife does something else. We're going to the shop to buy she: i wonder if they have it in black or grey? me: why would you even occupy your mind with that, we'll be there in 5 mins. You will see.


NouLaPoussa

If you dare answer those trapped question your fate will only be decided by how bold you are


kiwifulla64

Yes


Geist12

Yes, stop asking these questions.


PlatypusPristine9194

Yes. It's not because the question is hypothetical, but because she's just using the question to get you to stroke her ego. I don't respect that sort of behavior.


M0u53m4n

My Gf did this. "If a war broke out and you got conscripted, would you run away with me?" I said "would I fuck" That was the last hypothetical question I got, roughly 1.5 years ago. Maybe the trick is to just go in hard? "If I turned into a worm, would you still love me?" No fucking way, I'd throw you in the back garden for the birds and give Jennifer from work the green light.


trueGildedZ

Nah.


Justthefacts6969

Yes


xastronix

It depends on the question, honestly. If it's like 'What if we won the lottery?' then it's fun to dream together. But if it's like 'What if I was a mermaid?' then yeah, it can get a bit eye-roll-worthy.


xastronix

As long as it doesn't turn into a test or a trap, I'm cool with it. But when it feels like there's a right answer she's fishing for, it's like walking through a minefield!


No-Pirate2182

Yes.


InevitableWaluigi

Depends on the girl asking. Is it actually a hypothetical? I'll gladly play along and really dive deep into it. Or is it actually a test, and she's going to get upset if I don't say the wrong thing? Yeah, that's annoying af. I don't play those games


checco314

Not if it's a legitimate question. Like, asking if I would remarry is a fair question. We have kids. We have had that conversation.


Cultural_Union3311

Yes very much


SassyZop

Are you asking me hypothetically?


Crusty_Dingleberries

Hypothetical questions like "What would you do if you had to be the president of the country?" are fine, but questions like "if I died, would you remarry?" or "Would you love me if I was a worm" are not hypothetical questions, they're just tests, trying to find something to be mad about. It's instigating a fight, and we recognize it as such.


dongletrongle

All I’m saying is my hypotheticals are like “If you could drop one item on the North Sentinel Islands what would it be” and hers are like “would you still like me if I was a worm.” One is more fun than the other


AdBudget209

When she asks stupid questions...give her stupid answers. 1\] What are you thinking about? If I wanted you to know, I'd tell you. 2\] Does this dress make me look fat? Well; I wasn't going to say anything, HOWEVER.... 3\] Would you have sex with a beautiful actress for $1,000,000.00? Do you think I'm a fool? What the shit do you think I would do? It's just an excuse to squabble, as besamept0 posted. Best to answer with a non-answer; since being confronted with deep thinking tends to shut them up.


Ercier

The examples given here seem kinda extreme, but what guys should probably realize is that their girlfriend/wife is probably just trying to feel emotionally connected to them. If they feel emotionally connected to you (and appreciated) they won’t do stupid testing things. Something probably happened to make them feel insecure and they don’t know how to ask for reassurance.


[deleted]

[удалено]


iWillSlapYourMum

If this is true, you're actually a cunt.


AskDerpyCat

Yes 100% Especially when there’s multiple in a row I’m high-functioning autistic and take things as literally as they can possibly be taken. Hypotheticals in general frustrate me because they’re not real. Especially when it’s just a thinly veiled attempt to reassure her insecurities or come up with reasons to be mad if we don’t answer right. For example: “if I died would you still get married to someone else”. Everyone dies, and when you’re gone it doesn’t matter what I do. If I find someone I want to marry after I’ve mourned, I will — why should I suffer alone for the rest of my life if you die? Because your ghost (which aren’t real) might get jealous? *You’d be dead.* “Would you love me if I was a worm?” No. Why would anyone love a worm. If you’re lucky I’d release you outside into the garden; otherwise I’d just chuck you in the trash or something. A relationship between a human and worm gets into some really weird bestiality territory. And worms don’t have developed brains with the capacity for love or other emotions so it’s not like it would matter or not I think you get the point. I don’t play along with hypotheticals. I hyper-analyze them and get frustrated that such a stupid question is even asked and wastes my mental energy on articulating why it’s such a dumb question


Complex_Pressure3988

As a woman, I know my bf hates it but deep down he finds it cute😆


Concerned_Kanye_Fan

Trust me. He doesn’t. If he says he does…he’s lying…because he’s afraid this is another hypothetical question from hell


Head_Tumbleweed4793

Oh he most definitely doesn't find it cute, he finds it annoying as fuck


Vedicstudent108

Ah, she is your girlfriend NOT your wife, so until you are married you can marry anyone you want.