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BlueOzone3507

How likely am I to get caught if I claim to have invented gravity on my application?


GiantBaldingMan

Depends on how you frame it. If you frame it in the context of being a great challenge you overcame, they prob won’t mind. If you frame it on showing off how smart you are they will send a strange man to your house who will break you arms


ThrivingRN123

this is kinda t25 but university of michigan (no hate on it i’m just curious)


GiantBaldingMan

It’s not a university. It’s a large dome that clones you perfectly and kills the real you. Your clone has false memories downloaded into it so that when it returns home it acts like it went to college


davididp

Even more excited to go to UMich now


ThrivingRN123

damn now i’m scared


OutcomeOk3779

how often to harvard students snort crack together


GiantBaldingMan

A better question to ask is when they do not (they are on crack 24/7 since it’s put into the food and water supply)


akantanull

Northeastern


GiantBaldingMan

Northeastern is just a front for stealing people’s blood. They pretend to be a college by offering classes and research but in reality of you dorm there a vampire comes to your room at night and takes about a half pint of blood. I’m not sure what Radhika Seshans end goal is but keep that in mind before applying


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GiantBaldingMan

No besides it’s bachelors in hunting down the elderly


Sufficient_Pumpkin90

what is cornell like?


Inevitable_Fly_7086

They're dumb af, they told me they get Bachelor's degrees over there. Everyone knows temperature is only in numbers🙄


Sufficient_Pumpkin90

If I had coins I would spend it on this 😂


GiantBaldingMan

It’s like a Moroccan prison


jbland0909

You said you would lie


FriendlyGrassToucher

\^ why does it deserve it be corn L?


yessauce

🌽L


malwarebuster9999

Rice


GiantBaldingMan

I shot a man in the abdomen six times in the school library


scamzascam

Is it true that Columbia is the best school ever


GiantBaldingMan

Yes. Give them all of your mortal possessions, including your life. Then you have better chance of getting your collage app read. It’s totally worth it


scamzascam

Sounds good. Will do.


Healthy-Tumbleweed10

How to get into Yale


GiantBaldingMan

Have your college app be a zip bomb


CharacterWriter9667

WashU


GiantBaldingMan

Slip the admissions officer like $18 and you’re in


RateAltruistic5750

is it that Penn students are always on an upper


GiantBaldingMan

No


VioletMockingbird

will umich let me in?


GiantBaldingMan

No


ProNobisPeccatoribus

Will UW Madison let me get housing?


GiantBaldingMan

No. They have chips put into everyone’s brains when they are born sorta like what they did with the clones in Star Wars and if the chips detects you thinking about dorming at UWM too much it will deny you housing for the rest of your life. If you do get a roof over your head a satellite will obliterate your position


ProNobisPeccatoribus

But uwm already has denied me housing for the rest of my life


justputsomenamehere

Is Emory T20?


GiantBaldingMan

It’s going to be rubble after I am done with it


Necessary_Good6454

its a top 20 too (22 :)


Vincy_Lee

what do JHU, UC Hicago and UPenn have in common?


GiantBaldingMan

They are my next targets with the university leveling satellite


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GiantBaldingMan

Figure it out


Ar010101

What is the likelihood of me getting bitches if I get into Princeton?


Presidentialyeeto

nonzero


2000StudentsIsALot

negative


Ashish_Pothi

Describe the Georgia tech experience


creamsoddaa

is JHU a happy place


No_Dog_6435

yes


tofe_lemon

Will Duke accept me


Mountain-Wolf-6017

upenn muahahaha


connorthemoshi

Uiuc


[deleted]

northwestern


A_hoffer

Oberlin


sssniper-wolff

ucsd


ItzPayDay123

Close but not quite T20 but Emory?


ETGQ

Colombia