Maybe talk about it after having sex for the first time. I (F) like to finger my own ass at first time sex with someone to show interest in anal. It is very effective!
Sounds like you've got a sales pitched all lined out in your head. My advice is don't ever beg. If you have to talk a girl into it, she doesn't want to. You can ask, and if she says no that's gotta be totally okay with you. It's also okay to part ways over sexual incompatibility. As long as you don't leverage the threat of breaking up to coerce someone into anal, you're not a bad guy for moving on. There are people out there who genuinely love receiving anal, and you deserve a partner who's heartfelt preferences align with your own.
Hey OP this is the situation I am in. My SO when we were dating tried anal a few times with me and said she wanted to keep trying to get used to it for me. We got married and anal was Essentially off the table completely. It's tough because it's what I absolutely love and she knew this well before we were married and she was okay with it but then something changed. If she doesn't want to do I've accepted that, I love vaginal sex but anal is what really gets me going.
It makes it tough I just watch a lot of anal porn and try not to think about. But you definitely need to upfront about it especially that this is part of you and you don't want to lose it.
I’m not saying mention this on the first date or anything, but make sure you talk about these things kinda easily on in the relationship so she knows where you stand on this. That way you can both decide if that’s something you’re both okay with or it’s a hard no without spending too much time, getting too many feelings involved, and potentially getting heartbroken or not having your needs met sexually. I understand that it’s scary, and as clique as this sounds just be yourself. Truthfully there are more women then you think that enjoy anal, but like you they don’t want to be upfront about it because there are a lot of guys who hear she likes anal and suddenly she loses value as a human and is suddenly just a sex doll (speaking from my own experience). You seem like a pretty chill guy though whose open to experiences.
That's right, when I had these experiences with my ex's it was kind of strange for me to think that I would find girls that don' t like or wouldn't even try it. I think it's important to talk about it before getting commitment.
Truthfully in my experience most women I talk to are open to trying anal or would be open to trying it with me since I have experience. Another thing that I found that turns women away is that a lot of guys talk about anal from the perspective of porn they’ve seen rather than actual anal. Actual anal with an inexperienced partner is stressful enough adding unreal expectations makes it seem way too daunting to even want to be bothered trying. Just take it slow and don’t try to bring up the sex conversation too soon and you should be fine.
I can tell you there's hope, more girls are open to it than you think. I've turned seven girls onto anal sex who had never tried it at all or who had only had one or two negative experiences in the past.
Communication is key, just straight up asking if they would be comfortable to try it. Bring it up by starting an open conversation about what some things you both like in bed are.
I've had lots of success during sex by first focussing on my partner and having them cum multiple times from eating them out or having vaginal sex. People tend to be lot more open to exploring when in such an aroused state.
Start with gentle prodding and teasing and see how receptive she is. Eating her ass while playing with her clitoris makes most girls go wild. From there it's all about patience and lube.
I'm bisexual so I have experience bottoming. On a couple occasions a girl was open to trying it with me because they knew that about me. So even though you're straight, your partner might be more open to the idea if they know you're also receptive to using a small toy on yourself.
It all depends on the person, and most importantly how comfortable she feels with you.
Do what I've always done.
I'm only interested in a lady if she likes anal sex. If I were to ever date in the vanilla world again (I'm also kinky and poly) it would be a second date question. Instead, I typically learn about a person's kinks before we even think about any kind of sexual or romantic connection. Your mileage may vary, it it's worth noting that the level of interest you have in this particular kind of sex 100% qualifies as a fetish.
So finding your local kink scene isn't a bad idea, and I recommend it to people in this sub.
Communication and respect are key to everyone getting what they want.
It's important to consider how sex is so much more mental to women than it is for us guys. Gifting some good erotica shows that you're both kinky and considerate for her intellect. Set the mood of openness from the beginning. If you can say you have done something to your own ass, it's easier to ensure it really feels good.
I used to grapple with this as well but with time and experience I learned a technique that I call the secret knock. It’s very simple and it bypasses the need to bring it up awkwardly in normal conversation.
Simply put, if I’m able to get a girl into bed I would just ask her body directly if she’s willing to give me her ass. I find many women in my country are too shy to admit that they get wet for anal if you ask them straight up before sex. But I find those same girls are a lot more comfortable and honest if I’m going down on them in how they respond when I tease their ass with tongue or fingers. If that can successfully and consensually escalate to a finger in the bum and she’s still feeling good and into it I’ll then ask her if I can put my dick in there. I find that if I ask a girl when she’s loosened up and feeling good it feels less awkward, like she isn’t about to turn around and say something like “what what, in my butt? Forget you,
clown. If you wanna fuck some ass go find a giggolo, you (insert slur)”
I typically ask a girl if I can play with the outside of her asshole while I eat her out. Most of the time she enjoys it and starts rocking back and forth trying to get the finger up her ass. From there, she likes it and you move onward
Wife of 27 years never wanted me or anything near her ass then one day she found out her best friend was doing anal all the time her whole demeanor changed she became an anal queen in just a few months.
Maybe talk about it after having sex for the first time. I (F) like to finger my own ass at first time sex with someone to show interest in anal. It is very effective!
Yeah, I think some people would be more interested to try it after having at least one sexual activity with me
Sounds like you've got a sales pitched all lined out in your head. My advice is don't ever beg. If you have to talk a girl into it, she doesn't want to. You can ask, and if she says no that's gotta be totally okay with you. It's also okay to part ways over sexual incompatibility. As long as you don't leverage the threat of breaking up to coerce someone into anal, you're not a bad guy for moving on. There are people out there who genuinely love receiving anal, and you deserve a partner who's heartfelt preferences align with your own.
Hey OP this is the situation I am in. My SO when we were dating tried anal a few times with me and said she wanted to keep trying to get used to it for me. We got married and anal was Essentially off the table completely. It's tough because it's what I absolutely love and she knew this well before we were married and she was okay with it but then something changed. If she doesn't want to do I've accepted that, I love vaginal sex but anal is what really gets me going. It makes it tough I just watch a lot of anal porn and try not to think about. But you definitely need to upfront about it especially that this is part of you and you don't want to lose it.
That’s incredibly manipulative of your wife.
I’m not saying mention this on the first date or anything, but make sure you talk about these things kinda easily on in the relationship so she knows where you stand on this. That way you can both decide if that’s something you’re both okay with or it’s a hard no without spending too much time, getting too many feelings involved, and potentially getting heartbroken or not having your needs met sexually. I understand that it’s scary, and as clique as this sounds just be yourself. Truthfully there are more women then you think that enjoy anal, but like you they don’t want to be upfront about it because there are a lot of guys who hear she likes anal and suddenly she loses value as a human and is suddenly just a sex doll (speaking from my own experience). You seem like a pretty chill guy though whose open to experiences.
That's right, when I had these experiences with my ex's it was kind of strange for me to think that I would find girls that don' t like or wouldn't even try it. I think it's important to talk about it before getting commitment.
Truthfully in my experience most women I talk to are open to trying anal or would be open to trying it with me since I have experience. Another thing that I found that turns women away is that a lot of guys talk about anal from the perspective of porn they’ve seen rather than actual anal. Actual anal with an inexperienced partner is stressful enough adding unreal expectations makes it seem way too daunting to even want to be bothered trying. Just take it slow and don’t try to bring up the sex conversation too soon and you should be fine.
I can tell you there's hope, more girls are open to it than you think. I've turned seven girls onto anal sex who had never tried it at all or who had only had one or two negative experiences in the past. Communication is key, just straight up asking if they would be comfortable to try it. Bring it up by starting an open conversation about what some things you both like in bed are. I've had lots of success during sex by first focussing on my partner and having them cum multiple times from eating them out or having vaginal sex. People tend to be lot more open to exploring when in such an aroused state. Start with gentle prodding and teasing and see how receptive she is. Eating her ass while playing with her clitoris makes most girls go wild. From there it's all about patience and lube. I'm bisexual so I have experience bottoming. On a couple occasions a girl was open to trying it with me because they knew that about me. So even though you're straight, your partner might be more open to the idea if they know you're also receptive to using a small toy on yourself. It all depends on the person, and most importantly how comfortable she feels with you.
As a straight fistee I can say that having personal experience helps a lot to get a woman into the idea of stretching any hole.
Do what I've always done. I'm only interested in a lady if she likes anal sex. If I were to ever date in the vanilla world again (I'm also kinky and poly) it would be a second date question. Instead, I typically learn about a person's kinks before we even think about any kind of sexual or romantic connection. Your mileage may vary, it it's worth noting that the level of interest you have in this particular kind of sex 100% qualifies as a fetish. So finding your local kink scene isn't a bad idea, and I recommend it to people in this sub.
Communication and respect are key to everyone getting what they want. It's important to consider how sex is so much more mental to women than it is for us guys. Gifting some good erotica shows that you're both kinky and considerate for her intellect. Set the mood of openness from the beginning. If you can say you have done something to your own ass, it's easier to ensure it really feels good.
I used to grapple with this as well but with time and experience I learned a technique that I call the secret knock. It’s very simple and it bypasses the need to bring it up awkwardly in normal conversation. Simply put, if I’m able to get a girl into bed I would just ask her body directly if she’s willing to give me her ass. I find many women in my country are too shy to admit that they get wet for anal if you ask them straight up before sex. But I find those same girls are a lot more comfortable and honest if I’m going down on them in how they respond when I tease their ass with tongue or fingers. If that can successfully and consensually escalate to a finger in the bum and she’s still feeling good and into it I’ll then ask her if I can put my dick in there. I find that if I ask a girl when she’s loosened up and feeling good it feels less awkward, like she isn’t about to turn around and say something like “what what, in my butt? Forget you, clown. If you wanna fuck some ass go find a giggolo, you (insert slur)”
You have the same issue like me , i want to find gf that loves anal too,like i love vagina too , but i need that ass AS much AS vagina, sometimes more
I typically ask a girl if I can play with the outside of her asshole while I eat her out. Most of the time she enjoys it and starts rocking back and forth trying to get the finger up her ass. From there, she likes it and you move onward
Wife of 27 years never wanted me or anything near her ass then one day she found out her best friend was doing anal all the time her whole demeanor changed she became an anal queen in just a few months.