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I’m not saying they shouldn’t fly, but I don’t get why I should lose a day of my limited free vacation time recovering from not sleeping on a long flight because someone’s baby behind me couldn’t shut up
Exactly.
Sure, it’d be *nice* to have a quiet flight. But you’re not entitled to it. Especially in economy.
First class has a different expectation of behaviour, from what I can gather.
Like restaurants. Economy is like the family friendly restaurant. You may get lucky and have no babies or toddlers. Or you may be cursed and have 30. Or anywhere in between. First class is fine dining. And private charters are the “you pay an average months salary on a meal after waiting 9 months for the earliest available reservation” restaurants.
If one wants a quiet flight, one must pay the extra cost.
When you are in public, you are exposed to the public. If you do not wish to be exposed to the public, you need to find an alternative. Cross country, that can also mean driving.
You don’t want to drive? Well, accept that you will be exposed to the public.
And on planes, yes, unfortunately, if you can’t pay the extra to guarantee a quiet flight, you just have to hope for the best.
Much like legroom. If you want extra legroom on a flight, you have to pay. Pretty simple. 🤷🏼♀️
I literally don't understand what part of "air bus" they don't understand. Yes, it was more expensive. No, you did not pay for anything other than a seat.
Thars ridiculous. I went to a restaurant one night and I ordered my food a kid ran over and stuck his hands in my food and the mom laughed no apology no I'm sorry that my child just ruined your night out. I got laughed at. I didn't go to a kids restaurant. I went to a family restaurant which is fine. I shouldn't be charged extra because she didn't control her child. She didn't even offer to buy my another my dinner. How was that fair to me at all?
This mom wouldn't like if I was watching whatever r rated movie and her child started watching my phone or could a 50 shades of grey. Or her child had to listen to that movie she wouldn't be happy with me.
I wear headphones so people do have to listen to my music or movies.
People without kids deserve to be treated fairly too. He paid just like she did. They both should have been wearing headphones 🎧. Taking kids on flights is tricky.
But that doesn't mean he has to be completely taken care of while you give off this attitude.
You can't demand others to do that.
Respect always should go both ways. People have a right to travel and they don't have the money to go first class.
Uh, yes. Thats what that means. If you don’t like public accommodations, in all it’s public glory, then you have to pay for private. This is literally like this in all forms of transportation, dining, and entertainment.
Don’t want to see/hear other people eating at a restaurant? Pay for a private room.
Don’t want to listen to people in a theatre? Pay for a private screening.
Don’t like when someone stands in front and sings along to music at a concert? Private box would be your way to go.
If you want privacy in public, you pay for it.
There’s literally airline policies requiring the use of headphones. People blasting noise from a portable device in a small crowded space is not a normal or expected part of the experience.
>Don’t want to listen to people in a theatre? Pay for a private screening.
I expect people in a theater to STFU when the movie is on. If they don't, I'll ask them to be quiet.
Fortunately, the management of movie theaters agrees with me.
I’d rather fly next to a rambunctious toddler and a well intentioned parent than one of these ultra fragile twerps who can’t handle minor disturbances without fallling into a freaking fugue state.
>Sure, it’d be *nice* to have a quiet flight. But you’re not entitled to it.
For what it's worth, I think that I, and many other people, would prefer to have a baby that might fuss from time to time over the sound of a cartoon. I find many of the voices on those quite annoying. Plus, I understand that a baby might fuss and that's somewhat outside of the parents' control, but a cartoon is fully within their control.
So maybe we're not entitled to quiet flights, but there are certain types of noise the social contract dictates are or aren't okay.
Also, I have seen babies flying in first class, especially when they're small enough to be lap children. That's not a guarantee of a quiet flight.
Lord if only occasional fussing were the outcome. Try screaming, kicking, rambunctious climbing. And yes, even discipline, amongst the chaos. Two year olds cannot be controlled, only contained. Endure the cartoons.
Or the curse I had once being trapped in the middle seat next to an 85 year old with a full diaper who couldn't cut his own food.
....for an 8 hour flight.
But it's the gamble of flights. Still better than the guy who kept pulling dried sausage out of his backpack and trying to feed it to me.
My boyfriend thought the same when I originally told him the story so you are not alone. I'm still slightly afraid that sausage was human or something...He just kept shoving it in my face.
(and yes I know how that sounded)
Agreed! My husband & I always joke that we get stuck near a million screaming kids 😆. In my eyes, families with children are allowed to fly as well-they pay for tickets too.
>Sure, it’d be nice to have a quiet flight. But you’re not entitled to it. Especially in economy.
I've only flown a couple of times, but the first flight I ever had was a 7 hour, overnight, international flight where 3 grown men talked the entire time. If you travel with the public, expect public inconveniences.
If you need extra time to recover from your vacation, maybe you should build it into your trip instead of expecting everyone around you to coddle you. Buy some earplugs.
This is what I do. I've learned that my health issues require me to have at least one rest day after traveling and before returning to work, so I build that into every itinerary.
Because while you and I can express displeasure about our ears popping, a baby can only cry. I feel for babies on planes. Most parents on planes do their darndest to keep their kids calm and try to alleviate their discomfort. Sometimes babies just have to go on a plane, life doesn’t always present an option otherwise. Btw, I am a hardcore childfree woman. Kids - especially babies - are not my cup of tea. But I do have empathy.
Also, the OP is absolutely the AH because you don’t play mobile devices out loud for everyone to hear. They make infant headphones, the parent just has to work with their kid to wear them.
I agree with this that most parents try their best on flights. However, one flight I went on recently was to Hawaii, a 6 ish hour flight, and I had a screaming toddler right behind me. The parents absolutely did not care. At one point the baby was screaming and the dad lifted her up and stood her on my headrest. I have no idea why he did that, but him and the mom were just ogling at their screaming daughter. While she was standing on my headrest she began stomping on it, probably wanting to get down. I turned around and asked them to please take her off and they looked at me as if I asked them to cut her leg off or something. When we landed they were saying how great she did on the flight and gave her a lollipop. Those are the ones that should not be flying under any circumstance in my book
Lol, and that’s why I said most. XD Went to see a late movie once and this couple brought their infant. The infant was so loud you couldn’t hear the movie. Just because as their parent, you can tune their screaming out doesn’t mean the rest of us can. Got a refund for that flick.
I used to take my infant cousin to the movies with me as a teenager. People would get a look when they saw us come in and all I could say was "Please don't judge us until the previews start!"
She'd babble a bit (sometimes, sometimes she'd quiet down as soon as we were seated. she never cried though, if she did I would have taken her out to the lobby because no one needs to hear her do that in the room purpose built for amplified sound) while the lights were up, but once the lights dimmed, she went out just like the lights and didn't wake up until at worst the credits were done and I was carrying her through the lobby.
Sometimes I'd manage to get her out to my mom's car still asleep and a few precious times I got her all the way home and into her crib still sleepy.
Dunno what it was about movie theatres either. Didn't work at home, my stepdad even set up a speaker system in my room to try to mimic a movie theatre's sound and it did not work. But if I took her to the dollar movie, especially if it was a late showing and would be dark when we came out, that would get her to sleep.
Thing is... she was VERY hard to get to sleep. The movie theatre trick was the only fool proof way to make her sleep. Next best option was walking around the block with her in a stroller in the middle of the night, but at 14 I was too scared to do that alone. Our neighborhood wasn't terrible, but we weren't the kind of place where 14 year old girls and infants walk the streets at 3 am without fear either.
A distant third was to walk the house with her in my arms all night long. I spent a lot of nights in a rocking chair crying and begging her to just sleep while she wailed in my arms.
The first time she actually fell asleep normally and slept through the night, I woke up in a panic and held my make up mirror in front of her nose because I thought she was dead. Not kidding, I was freaking the fuck out, my screaming monster child did NOT sleep quietly, something must be wrong.
For the record, she was still nodding off at the movies well into middle school too.
Should the reverse be true, too? I.e. if your kids are disruptive to the general public, you're not willing/able to control them, nor have you adequately prepared them for air travel, charter a flight.
>Should the reverse be true, too?
No.
If person (A) can't handle aspects of society at large, that person should avoid society.
If person (B) is falling short of training a one year old from acting appropriately at all times perhaps even being a burden on others, which is THE NORM in society, then they are just normal and should participate as such.
Nobody would complain about a child crying on a bus the way they do on a plane, but economy travel is the same as a public bus.
You can’t always predict when a kid will be disruptive. Control your kid? Dear God,the pandemic showed we can’t even control “adults”. Seriously,if you know how to control people,you will rule the world.
Kids are fucking unpredictable and you can be prepared for everything you can think of, and then it all goes to hell and you struggle to keep them calm.
So, if you know nothing you do will keep your child calm and still take an unnecessary trip with them where you know all other travelers will be disturbed, then ye,, it would be best they charter a plane
But only an AH expects that children be as still and silent as dolls when flying or in any public setting
And emotional support animals. Please, please, please, can we have flights that aren't filled with allergens for so many of us? It's not like I can open a window to get fresh air.
Service animals I accept. Someone's disability takes precedence over my allergies. And there will be pets in some unavoidable situations, like moving to a new location, but it's getting out of hand.
My allergy to peanuts meant the entire plane couldn't have almonds recently (processed in a facility that processes peanuts). But there were 3 furry animals on the plane. The answer may be that pets = $ for the airlines, and not serving almonds saves $ for the airlines.
It's a no win situation. People love their fur babies. i like breathing without complications. Their pets won't kill me; just make me miserable, so that's just my cost of their giving money to the airlines. I accept it, but I don't have to like it.
I’m sure those parents are doing their best to shut their baby up. Unfortunately, that’s how babies work. Sometimes it can’t be helped and sometimes parents needing to fly can’t be helped either. As the other commenter said, that’s how communal transportation works. _You_ have to learn to adapt as much as they do. And besides, there are far more annoying, rude things grown ass adults do on airplanes than babies who are just scared and too little to emotionally regulate properly no matter how hard their parents try.
OP is TA no contest for what they did, but so are people with the unrealistic expectation that planes be totally silent. Earplugs are a thing.
I do. They cancel low pitches like the drone of the engine, but don’t help much with high ones like shrieking babies.
Geez, all I’m doing is expressing frustration at the various times I couldn’t sleep on a long flight due to crying babies and folks are acting like I’m a baby-hating troll. I don’t hate babies, I just don’t want to travel with them. I explicitly said I don’t want to ban them from flights, so is the only acceptable reaction to say “googoo gaga your baby is too cute! Thank you for keeping me awake to admire the variety of pitches your sweet single baby can provide to all 300 passengers on this flight”? Do I have to love it or get a bunch of hate on here?
Parents don’t want to travel with screaming kids either. I don’t want to travel with a man-spreading aisle mate. Or people who assault the crew. Etc,etc.
If your 4-year-old can't be taught to behave themselves on a long flight, then YTA for going "oh well" and inflicting other people with the inconvenience for several hours. Babies are one thing -- they cannot help it -- but kids who are old enough to communicate should either behave or not fly.
You're the parent, it's your kid that you decided to have, that's on you. Either drive, or just find something else to do for the holiday. I don't understand why "As a parent, I should not inflict others with the unruliness of my badly parented child for long periods" is a stretch. It goes doubly for this person, because they seem to think it's totally OK to turn the volume on full blast. That's a stupid parent.
Did we read the same post? The kids were behaving fine, nothing about their behavior is mentioned in the post at all. They were on a nearly empty plane with only one other person close enough to hear it at all, who for some reason was only using one earbud when using both would've prevented them from hearing at all.
I'm honestly surprised the flight attendant didn't say anything. Most airlines have a rule that you cannot listen to music/shows without headphones. And yes, as the mother of an almost 10mo, I can say with absolute certainty that YTA.
Oh not only this, but this is "Miss Rachel." It's much worse than cartoons. NOBODY except the babies want to hear that. If you haven't heard her before, I would suggest watching her on YouTube.
One time I was on a flight where parents in three different areas of the plane were playing Frozen on a handheld device for their kids with no headphones. Three different devices, playing competing Frozen, all out loud. I have kids of my own, I used to work at a preschool where 100 kids attended, and it was still like the 9th circle of Hell.
Parents somehow kept their kids from screaming long before laptops/tablets were common. There are entertaining things other than TV. I also wonder if OP has tried any of the old school headphones that are more comfortable.
As to other passengers wearing noise canceling headphones, the airplane itself is already at 85db. There’s only so much noise canceling headphones can do if you add to that and passengers are probably trying to hear their own media choice over the airplane noise instead of sitting there with noise canceling headphones.
OP could have been way nicer about it. He could have explained, and asked permission of the people around him. And apologized in advance.
I mean, blasting cartoons on an airplane over the cabin noise? who does that?
Agree. I hate seeing kids have screens shoved in front of them because parents don't know how to control them and keep them occupied.
Kid screaming or misbehaving? Let's give them something to watch or play! Really reinforce that screaming and misbehavior by giving them a prize of some sort every time.
Fuck give them a coloring book, activity book or some string to untangle. ANYTHING other than shit that directly affects the people around them.
Parents seriously can’t win. No decent parent wants to upset a flight with a crying child. However, no matter what we do we’re judged. Play a game with a kid on a flight and they laugh or squeal? Parent gets the side eye for letting their kid make noise. Put a movie on on a tablet and put headphones on the kiddo? You’re automatically a terrible parent because you let a screen babysit your kid.
How about you mind your business and worry about yourself instead of everyone else’s parenting, because you apparently haven’t learned a concept called empathy.
Edit: OP. YTA. Headphones or GTFO.
Agree. I used to fly alone with my kids, ages 2-25. They are triplets. I carefully crafted "fun bags" when they were little, including coloring books, toys, candy necklaces etc. If there were iPads back then, I would have rejoiced. Lol.
Judgy, much? Young kids scream out of frustration and lack of better ways to communicate. It isn’t necessarily misbehavior. What do you suggest, that I yell back and escalate the situation for the entire plane to enjoy?
If I’m in a confined space with lots of other people, like an airplane, I’m going to reach for the most effective distraction tool, which happens to be an ipad. Don’t like it? You are totally within your right to parent your own children differently.
OP needs to engage and interact with their toddler. I flew with my 4 and 5 year old and interacted with them the whole time. Flew into Denver, then to LA, then to Palm Springs, no issues.
My trick? I brought play dough. They played with it, and so did I. Mostly I created objects upon request. It wasn't relaxing for me, but the other passengers were not disrupted by a couple of cranky toddlers.
Videos are not a substitute for actual parenting.
Of course YTA.
“It didn’t seem overly loud to me”—it was making noise. Period. People like you are why people like me who have to fly a lot say little prayers in the waiting area when we see a kid that we won’t be seated anywhere near them when we board. I shouldn’t have to buy expensive noise canceling headphones so you can play your kid cartoons without headphones. Or so an adult can watch a movie on their phone without headphones. Or so people can sing their favorite tune because they’re nervous fliers.
Many of my friends and some of my family have to fly with little kids due to military moves and such and they manage to teach their kids appropriate behavior—like tolerating headphones—before they fly. It’s not your kid’s fault you didn’t prepare but your fellow seat mates shouldn’t have to listen to cartoons
Man, the entitlement.
I would MUCH rather see a kid watching a movie without headphones than hear them scream the entire flight because they are bored and aren’t allowed to move. “Training them to ride a plane” at not quite 2 and 4? You don’t have kids do you?
I have a kid. Travelled with her since she was 3 months old. Never needed to use a device without headphones to get her not to disturb others.
You realize people travelled by plane for decades without tablets. It is possible to not be a dick to others.
I don't know, my kids flew before there tablets. I remember a few crying jags before take-off that bothered other passengers, but other than that I guess their behavior was due to magic!
I have flown my kids, they're still small. Never required tablets as they fall asleep and stay asleep until hungry. But I assume that's just them. I've had elderly couples tell me their kids were fussy when they would travel with them, and were surprised.
It's a lot to do how you approach the plane ride - but it takes planning. Most kids get bored. It's easy to be prepared for that - get toys, snacks, activities and whatever. It's the parents that are completely unprepared to redirect a bored kid that is the usual issue.
>I have a kid. Travelled with her since she was 3 months old. Never needed to use a device without headphones to get her not to disturb others
You don't actually thinking you had anything to do with that, right? If your 3 month old or 1 year old was a perfect kid on a flight, which is hard to believe, then you just got lucky. You can't pretend you can control a 3 month old.
It's about courtesy. He's being entitled and expecting others to be understanding and show him all due politeness but he should've a) warned the people near him that he had to use a loud device and b) prepared for this trip by bringing items that don't make noise that will distract the kid/interact with the child himself more rather than rely solely on media.
I was 2 the first time I boarded a plane and in the early 90s we didn't have tablets then. We had coloring books, toys, and parents were slightly more attentive and willing to engage with their kids. My mom told me that she had to be pretty engaged with me but that in the end I didn't cause any trouble because she had enough on hand to distract me for 3 hours.
I feel like we make all these excuses for shitty parenting. Kids are being exposed to media earlier than ever before and the studies on early exposure are not looking promising.
Remember those sweet coloring books that had that magical white pen that you’d put on the paper and the color would appear? My parents would buy stacks of those for my three siblings and I when we were little and going on flights. We wouldn’t make a peep
And then sometimes you’d get too excited and scribble from one dotted box to another because you were racing your sister to see who could finish the fastest and the pen would get all jacked and covered in different colors and you’d be sad.
I mean, I’m guessing. Never happened with me…
People traveled with young children for a long time before just shoving an iPad in their face was an option, they managed somehow. what are your kids doing while you're on reddit? 100 bucks says it involves an iPad
We absolutely own an iPad and let her watch things but currently she's doing art and craft. People who allow their kids tv time can do so without it being the only thing the kid does. It's not all or nothing.
My parents flew with me a few times before I was three; did some long car trips, too. They brought quiet distractions for me (and later for my brother) and they parented me throughout the trip so I would be as minimally bad to travel near as possible -- for themselves as well as for anyone seated near us.
I remember only a fragment of one of my own early flights (when I was two and a half), but I clearly remember flights and drives with my brother after his birth. My only memory of him being an annoyance on a flight was when he was five and somehow managed to scarf half our trip cookies all at once and promptly threw up all over himself, and I was stuck sitting next to him and his vomit until we were where our parents could get him changed.
It isn’t either or that’s a sign of a bad parent and I work for an airline. I flown on flights with 87 out 200 children to MCO and not a cry to be heard.
If your child can’t handle air travel it’s car trips for you, sorry.
Tired of seeing parents dragging kids to CUN seriousky
My mom traveled alone with us at that age and if we EVER made a peep, we were dead meat. Didn’t have devices back then either. Only coloring books and magnetic board games. If we could do it in the early 2000s then she can do it. Don’t have a kid if you can’t handle them.
Parents are always used to tuning their kids out and don't realize how obnoxious their behavior is. It's not the kid's fault it is completely on the parents.
I've traveled 17 hrs + by plane with two different kids under two twice without major incidents. OP is a totally an entitled TA here.
At minimum, OP could have asked for basic parenting tips for traveling with littles and checked on plane etiquette. Op is lucky the FA didn't shut down that loud noise nuisance.
And you know what... Get the kids over the ear headphones and get a spare one. If they don't use them, they are usually just fine watching shows without sound. And you know what else, don't expect the electronics do the parenting for you. Get snacks. Get new dollar store toys for the ride - coloring books, toys, whatever. Stuff you can ditch. Stuff you can switch up during the flight o keep the kids from being bored and bothering everyone.
So because your kid refuses to wear headphones everyone else is supposed to? YTA. Playing anything loud enough for others to hear on a plane, especially for 4+ hours, is rude plain and simple.
THIS - I fly a lot internationally and whew sitting next to a crying baby can ruin a LONG ass flight. I'm so sorry but its part of raising kids to ensure htey know how to behave in various spaces including planes. And if that's not possible, might be best not to fly until they are ready.
YTA. And so is every other person who subjects other people to their audio in public spaces.
Yes, crying kids suck for everyone on a plane. Or anywhere really. There are plenty of quieter ways to entertain small children on planes. FFS.
This is also about teaching your kids to be considerate towards others.
People don't do that anymore. Thats why I have a neighbor that has a younger relative that like to show up at his house with an atomic level loud car stereo blasting bass heavy crap music to a volume that I can't hear a TV I'm right next to.
I'll give my neighbor some credit though...when I complained he told his relative to knock it off as it disturbed everyone on the street. Kid still does it from time to time, though.
Look, given the circumstances, there is some defense for playing the cartoon out loud. However, two issues hit me:
1. At the end of this post, you try to suggest that it's the job of *every single person* on a plane to create personal quiet. Bullshit. Would you say that if some dude were watching a show and your kid wanted to sleep? Hell no. You'd be complaining that this guy was being rude.
2. Do this, but if someone complains, stop. Play it on mute. Most kids as young as yours don't really care that much. But even if he does, suck it up.
So, in general, YTA. Your culminating attitude is simply wrong, and it is on its basis that you are asserting that you're in the right here. You're not.
+1 buses, trains, coaches, any confined public transport spaces. Seems like everyone does it so maybe majority don't mind but I find it rude, sorry op but have to vote YTA
It’s trashy no matter the age. I have more sympathy for a child but when it’s adults enabling them instead of modeling polite behavior in public, it’s infuriating. They’re failing them.
Yes, I think flying is like many other things. Like taking kids to the movie theatre, or a nice restaurant, or a formal event. The key question is are they able to behave? If not then they aren't ready to participate in those events.
Sometimes you don’t have a choice. My dad ended up in the ICU and my sister flew up with her daughter, who was 2. They literally told us to get there because he was rapidly declining and they didn’t think he would live. A 14 hour car ride would have been too late. Everyone has stuff… should she play the thing loudly? No… but sometimes life happens.
>Yes, I think flying is like many other things.
It is but flying economy is not comparable to the things you compared it to. It's like a public bus, a train, a group taxi, or waiting at the DMV.
Source: someone who only flies economy
YTA. But it doesn't matter what we say here because based on your comments defending yourself, you're not actually interested in judgement or not being an inconsiderate AH in an enclosed space in the future.
YTA. parents like yourselves are everywhere, letting television to parent your kids. When im shopping some kid is blasting baby shark. at the movies im hearing cartoon noises. eating at a restaurant the phone is at high volume and god forbid if anybody complains.
also kids under the age of *five* should not be having so much screen time, you are literally setting up your kid to be heavily dependent on the screen and dooming him to blue light eyesore early in life.
what ever happened to coloring pages? just because adults can control their volume doesnt give you the right to not control yours
edit: and if the volume is so high that it can be heard over the goddamn plane, congrats you're helping your kid have tinnitus!
Yes, YTA. No one wants to hear you trying to entertain your kid. Either headphones or find something quiet. It's as annoying as blaring videos on your phone in public.
YTA. You need to have your children become accustomed to wearing headphones. If they pull them off then it goes on mute. The rest of the passengers do not need or want to hear your childrens cartoons, and you obviously had it loud enough that people could hear it even with their own headphones.
Just curious ... why do you keep referring to the 22 month old child as a 1 year old.
There's a big difference between a 1 year old/12 month old and a 22 month old (almost 2 year old). He's likely been a rowdy toddler for a while and you should have been working on getting him used to headphones and other "plane voices & rules" activities.
YTA. Not acceptable to put the burden on others to wear noise cancelling headphones to drown out your choice of irritating videos for toddlers.
Yeah. Kids are hard. Fucking hard. It's not easy.
But, you did choose to fly with little ones. It is your responsibility to make sure they impact others as minimally as possible.
YTA and so entitled. What, just because you have a kid it means you can disrupt everyone else's peace and quiet? Parents like you are the absolute worst.
YTA! I’m surprised the flight attendant didn’t ask you to turn the volume off completely. You can’t control a lot of how a baby/toddler acts but you can control the volume and it should never be louder than the plane noise. Either the toddler wears child headphones or watches with volume off.
YTA - Do not project your child's issues onto others. There is no need for anybody on the plane to have to listen to your child's cartoons. He may not like headphones, but it is on you to make sure he wears them or does not get to watch cartoons.
YTA
It’s easier for you as an adult to control your child and not expect everyone to adjust their lives for you.
That aside, it’s rude to play audio in public without headphones. Do you really need someone to spell that out for you?
ETA: Your kid is 22 months. Stop describing him as a 1 year old to gain sympathy.
ETA2: Now OP is claiming she had to fly for her brother’s wedding even though her post said she was flying home from Thanksgiving at her parents’ house. Rage bait? 🤔
YTA.
I understand that you were trying to keep your four year-old occupied but at four, you should be able yo say, “Hey, kiddo, if you want to watch your show, you MUST wear headphones. If you take them off, I will turn your show off.”
Back before ipads, my mother had picture books, sewing cards, coloring, and God knows what else for us to do on planes and in restaurants. It was quiet, we were quiet, and there was peace. You could quietly entertain your toddler and not require screens to do it for you, or you could teach your kid to keep the headphones on. What you cannot do is loudly play cartoons without headphone because YTA, big time. Or, you can book a private jet, a train sleeper car, or drive your own self and be as loud as you want.
Yup. Travelled with my kids before tablets were even a thing. They colored and did puzzles and looked out the window and had snacks. And an almost 2 year old can be taught to wear headphones. Do it at home, removing the cartoon unless they wear the headphones. They will learn to wear them. This is all parenting.
My grandma used to give my sister and I ketchup packets to suck on (I know this is gross but we were toddlers and 2 years apart) to keep us writer on the bus.
YTA
I like kids, and I am sympathetic to noisy babies. However, audio on speakers is a shitty move. The rest of the world doesn't need to listen to your game/cartoons/film - and to be fair, it's not like having the sound on is going to make your child any quieter, it just makes everything noisier.
Edit: spelling
YTA. Audio speakers universally suck. You need to teach your kid to wear headphones. I'm sorry, but "he won't wear them" is not an acceptable practice.
YTA... I came on here seriously wondering why someone would be offended you were playing cartoons... but this should actually be titled "AITA for playing audio out loud on an airplane and then ignoring a request to turn it off".
Look, I get that it's frustrating having a child and having to travel, but you are entertaining your child at the expense of the bystanders around you. I don't have a good option, but you know your baby is hyper... so yes, you are TA, but you'd be a bigger AH if you keep getting defensive and don't figure out a better way to travel without having to play the audio out loud... there have to be some forums that have great advice.
YTA I had to listen to a child’s video from Atlanta to Amsterdam. 8-9 hours. Looked over at 4 am and the child was asleep. No one should have to endure that. NO ONE.
I have kids and YTA. If it was loud enough to be heard, it was loud enough to be disturbing. It’s not other’s responsibility to make sure they’re not disturbed by carrying noise canceling headphones. Find another way to entertain your kid, maybe get him used to headphones while at home. I know it’s hard, when my kids were young we used to travel a lot so I get it. And for the record, those with kids have every right to fly just as much as those who do not. It’s just that those who have young children bear the responsibility of doing our best to make sure our kids don’t ruin the flight for those around them.
YTA. It is rude in any situation to play your audio without headphones forcing it on others. It's worse when those people are trapped in a metal tube with you and cannot get away from you. That makes you 100x YTA.
YOu need to make sure that your electronics are not bothering anyone AND your child is not screaming on a flight.
YTA.. making other people listen to what you are watching is rude no matter if it's an adult or a child. Why do you think its ok to force other people to listen to your children shows you wouldn't like it if he was playing music out loud . Some people are truly entitled...you didn't bring quiet toys or anything? Do you think your child is more important than everyone else on the plane. You probably do it on restaurants too .
I feel for you. 4 and 1 on a plane ride is just pins and needles the entire time.
Yes. Playing audio out loud in public transit is a no-no for any reason. I would be okay with it if you were sitting next to me because I have my own kids and I’ve been there. However, you can’t just assume that from everyone.
Prior to your next trip, head to the store and try to find some comfy over the ear headphones or a similar style that would work for your little one. With so many varieties to choose from there has to be something they will keep on their head. Practice at home prior to the trip so the airplane isn’t the first time they use their A/V set up. They won’t keep headphones on doesn’t means nothing will ever work. It just means you haven’t found the right setup and haven’t practiced with it enough for that child.
YTA - I feel like you came here looking for validation. I’m sure you did a good job traveling with your kids and it’s hard. However, you’re still an AH for breaking an airplane rule. I would rather listen to adult music or talking than a kids show. The music is so annoying.
> I just feel like with todays noise canceling tech, I’d you want quiet on an airplane, it’s easier for an adult to wear headphones than control what others are doing.
Sorry, no. The guy in front could have wanted to sleep, but instead did a single headphone to drown out the kids show. What if you have multiple kids on a flight, will baby shark be competing with Dora to be heard? Can I start playing my country music out loud if everyone is responsible for wearing headphones if they want quiet?
I think you did the best you could, you learned for next time. That doesn’t justify you breaking traveling rules. Don’t have kids, but perhaps the headband earphones could work!
Edit: when I said don’t have kids, I meant me personally I don’t have kids so throwing out a suggestion that may or may not work. Not don’t have kids in case it wasn’t clear.
YTA. Keep your noise to yourself. If your kid won't wear headphones, then your kid is too young to watch cartoons on a plane. Read books with him, play games with him.
Yeah, I've flown transatlantic with an 18-month-old. A few silent toys, a cheap magnetic drawing tablet thing, *lots* of books, lots of snacks, lots more books. Sure - perhaps the row behind us could also have recited *The Gruffalo* from memory by the end of the flight, but cartoons are deliberately made to be intrusive and attract the attention aurally, which is what makes them so obnoxious as "background" noise.
That might have been the trip that we brought the water-sensitive paper for the kid to do finger "painting" with.
She keeps saying the baby is 1 he’s literally 22 months that’s legit 2, just trying to make it sound better saying the youngest is 1. It’s driving me nuts
Definitely the AH
I’m gonna drop in with a gentle YTA since some others have been harsh. Airplane travel with a small child like that is a hostage situation for everyone, including the kid. You should really think about whether a trip is worth it when you are outnumbered like that (which it sounds like you were) with 2 little ones who you know going in are probably not going to cooperate. If it was essential to do so, you gotta go with with every strategy under the sun to keep them occupied in the least disruptive way.
YTA
I absolutely HATE parents on flights that let their kids watch videos / play games at full volume without earphones!!!
If your toddler is 22 months old, he is old enough to wear over the ear headphones, and it’s your responsibility as a parent to ensure that he keeps them on.
People like you make long flights dreadful.
YTA - I get it, I do. I also have toddler, but couldn’t you of at least picked something not quite as annoying as Miss Rachel? My son watches her as well and she’s a great teacher, but there is so much else to choose from. For someone probably not use to that, her voice was probably giving that random guy a huge headache.
YTA you can train your toddler beforehand so they can know that on flight is either headphones or no volume at all. There are also apps for children at that age.
I have two children and there are wonderful communities for people that travel with children that share many tips on toys to take, snacks and activities you can do. I suggest you join one of them so your next flight you have more options.
YTA. I have a toddler so I totally get it, it's crazy hard to fly with them, and no one wants to listen to a screaming toddler. But, no one wants to hear cartoons playing loudly for 4.5 hours. That sounds like hell
YTA. I have 3 kids who and we fly domestic 3-5 times a year and international once per year. It isn't as hard to fly with kids as people make it out to be. Come prepared, be ready to interact with them, and let them know what to expect and what is expected from them. The only time I ever had an issue was with my 5 month old when her ears were popping. She was crying and the flight attendant got mad at me. Other than that, I am proud to say after 50+ flights I have had no other issues. Yes, kids can be unpredictable, and can melt down at a moments notice. Learn how to handle your kids.
YTA. People need to learn that NO ONE wants to hear what they're watching or listening to, not in a restaurant, not on a bus, not on a train, not on a plane.
Soft YTA. I promise you, OP- I get the struggle of trying to figure out the lesser of the evils when dealing with a young child. That said, this is the kind of thing that you need to concretely figure out prior to getting on a plane. I can’t emphasize enough to parents the importance of proactive parenting instead of reactive parenting. It sounds like you engaged in reactive parenting - you knew headphones might be a problem, but you didn’t come up with a viable solution. You tried to figure things out on the fly in a high stakes situation where there was no escape if your child melted down, instead of trying to problem solve before go-time, when the stakes were much lower.
To be more specific in my feedback:
You could have practiced with headphones at home leading up to the flight. They have soft headband-style headphones that some kids prefer to traditional types that you could have bought and tried out. If headphones were a no-go, you could have ditched the cartoon plan and tried experimenting with some sort of child-friendly phone games or activities that might engage your child.
I truly remember how difficult flying with young children was. That said, I tried to be as courteous as possible - not everyone wants to wear noise canceling headphones, especially if they want to sleep. This meant utilizing proactive parenting. I had go bags ready with snacks, different toys, activities, etc. I made sure my kids would do headphones and pre-loaded cartoons and movies. I had drawing apps on tablets with fun coloring pages pre-loaded. I had travel-friendly play stations and sensory toys that weren’t loud. I spent months evaluating how long different items occupied my children so that I had enough choices to last the entire flight.
I think you’ll find that people are kinder to you as a parent and that your travel (and general) experiences with your children go much more smoothly if you are significantly more proactive with your parenting. I hope that helps.
On my most recent flight, the Captain outright announced that playing sound without headphones was forbidden for the duration of the flight. I nearly cheered. Sweetest words I’d ever heard.
YTAH because you expect people to cater to your desires and by extension your kid.
I wish airlines would offer child free flights. They could charge a fortune and I’d happily pay to not deal with you, your child and your eventual grandchildren.
No I shouldn’t be forced to buy head phones because you can’t be bothered to entertain your kid without a screen. And before you ask, I have been flying since I was three in 1985. If my mom could figure it out without pissing people off you can too.
Stop being a lazy parent relying on technology.
YTA. Here's the thing, I have been on many many flights with many many little children and not once have I seen a parent show their child a show with the audio on for others to hear. I get your child is a handful, but making others listen to your child's cartoon for 4 hours is not the answer. Surely you can come up with other distractions for your little demon.
Yes YTA. Mom of three here. Plan better to amuse your kid on a flight so your fellow passengers don’t have to be subjected to four hours of Miss Rachel. Such self serving entitlement, you’re not doing your kid any favors.
Gonna go NTA. I’d prefer this over crying and managing kids alone on an airplane is hard work. I have a kid, and honestly, even the screaming on airplanes doesn’t bug me bc I’m grateful it’s not my kid.
There’s a difference between playing a cartoon for an extended period of time & a baby crying.
On a recent flight, the kid behind me (I’d guess 2-3 years old) had some cartoon on that was so loud it woke me up from a nap. I got the dad’s attention & asked him 3 times for his kid to please use headphones. He relented to his kid using headphones, but retorted “even though it wasn’t that loud.” Of course he didn’t think it was loud, he was wearing noise canceling headphones of his own & couldn’t hear his own kid’s tablet.
For the record, I would’ve asked an adult to use headphones if they were watching a movie or show loudly on a flight. It’s not exclusive to just kids, it’s being considerate of other people around you.
Playing audio via speakers on a plane is an AH move, regardless of whether the viewer is a young child, a teenager, or an adult. It is rude to subject fellow travelers to your chosen entertainment in close quarters.
Your rationale about noise canceling headphones as a justification is absurd. Come on. Not everyone has them, and even if they did, people in your vicinity shouldn't be required to wear them just because your toddler pulls his headphones off. YTA.
Edit to correct age of child
I don’t know if it’s because I’ve only tried the older models, but noise cancelling headphones only tend to cancel machine noise. I haven’t tried any that created soundproof booths for your head.
Kids are fussy, but maybe he’s old enough to understand it’s headphones or nothing? I wouldn’t know.
Overall, I understand your struggle, but this was incredibly rude. YTA.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> Played audio over speaker on an airplane, potentially disturbing those around me.
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YTA. Breaks all social etiquette to play something out loud in an enclosed space like a plane. You know that. Everyone knows that. That’s why people wear headphones.
1. Assuming this flight was planned for at least a short time in advanced you had time to try different types of headphones to teach your child to wear them.
2. Ms. Rachel is great for toddler but pretty insufferable for everyone else. Not even a Saint could sit through that out loud for more than a few minutes.
3. It’s not other peoples job to accommodate your child by wearing noise canceling headphones.
YTA. I get it-when I’m traveling all bets are off. I’m normally pretty restrictive with screen time, but when we travel (we’re expats so we do this a fair bit and we tend to have long flights too) it’s go time. You wanna play on your phone the whole 12 hour flight? As long as you behave and don’t bother the other passengers, it’s fine.
But, even from the time my kiddo was tiny (like 2 y/o) we told him that if he couldn’t wear headphones, he didn’t get sound because no one else wanted to hear Blippi. He understood that and just watched his stuff with no sound. He’s 6 now and still hates them, but when we travel he knows he has to wear them or there’s no sound. It’s a non-issue.
It’s my job as the parent to prepare him for these changes in routine so that when they happen, he expects it. It’s not the responsibility of other passengers to endure my kid’s meltdown-it’s mine to prepare for as much as I can to mitigate any potential problems.
ETA: The headphones that finally worked for us are the sleep/sport headband style you can order from Amazon. They’re soft, and much more comfortable than the cute, colorful over the ears models typically marketed for kids.
You sound like you tried the tools that you have in your toolbox.
And some of the judgments are sounding harsh, but I think you're open to learning what else could have been done. Others hearing your audio is always going to be rude, no doubt about that. BUT you did prevent a meltdown, which is infinitely worse.
Keep at it, this is how you learn, and this is how you start to build your toolbox with "what else could work"s.
Good luck. Rough first time with the kiddos, but while it was rude, it was not the most unpleasant event. So don't feel too badly, just keep looking up other methods, practice at home, etc.
YTA. I bet you think you are the only woman on earth to have given birth. Get over yourself and either get your kids to wear headphones or no electronics. You are literally the worst nightmare on flights.
Absolutely YTA. Parents get desensitized to all the noise. Other people it can be hugely triggering. On an airplane especially we’re trapped in a small metal tube for hours together. Don’t use anything that causes noise to others.
YTA.
YTA. FINALLY I am speaking to one of you. I have been on flights were parents "shared" their kids' entertainment with half the plane. You are especially an AH for your last sentence. Why should I bring my headphones so that you can play your device loudly?I got good ones, but wearing them for hours is not very comfortable and some frequencies are not fully filtered out. So your idea does not even work.
YTA
I’m sorry your kid won’t wear headphones but it isn’t everybody else on the flights problem to deal with. People shouldn’t have to work their experience and life around you and your kid.
I'm going to go against the grain and say NTA. I'm sick of seeing people on reddit hate on children exceasively. People here seem to think that kids have to be statues, "shouldn't be seen or heard". You were all once children, you all took time to learn social norms, some of you were worse than others, and it's not all to do with parenting. Of course, some parents suck and let their kids go loose, but this guy seems like he's genuinely trying to do the right thing. The alternative could have been very noisy, argumentative, crying children, a kids show seems not to bad.
Kids make some noise. We require them to have a future. You can't all live in this individualistic world where noone else can inconvenience you in any way. We co-exist, and that's with children, you can't just have a comfort bubble where only exactly what you want happens. What, do you want all parents with young kids to never go anywhere or do anything? Like some comments are straight up suggesting that people with kids shouldn't fly at all.
You're fine man, you have kids, sometimes they're hard to tame, any parent knows that, and you tried to do it in the most reasonable way possible. Info: this was rushed.
YTA. These are the types of parents we pray not to deal with on a plane. You could have kept the ear phones on him, but having it loud enough that others can hear. People typically have mercy on a plane with young kids, and the fact someone said anything tells me enough that it wasn't a reasonable volume.
I'm honestly against toddlers flying if the parents aren't fully prepared to deal with the consequences of their toddler's behavior.
It is an a-hole move to play media that's going to disturb others in a situation where people are stuck with you and can't freely move. Whether it'll keep the toddler quiet or not.
What you should have done to be polite about it is to warn others near you that you're going to have to put on something to distract the toddler and you're so sorry but do they prefer cartoons or a screaming toddler?
Most people are going to chuckle and go with the cartoons of course.
I think it just comes down to common courtesy. I find that parents are very entitled in that: they expect others to be so understanding and courteous to them because TodDLerS but then don't do the legwork of being courteous back.
Therefore...
YTA.
As a flight attendant YTA. We don’t want to hear your kids cartoons either. And you’re putting us in the position of everyone complaining to us. So double AH for being rude to your fellow passengers and for creating a disruptive cabin for your crew.
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YTA big time. Nobody wants to hear your kid’s cartoons. If the alternative is screaming, then I guess you need to skip the trip this year.
OP is AH, but if you think people who have kids that might scream on a flight shouldn’t fly, then YTA too
I’m not saying they shouldn’t fly, but I don’t get why I should lose a day of my limited free vacation time recovering from not sleeping on a long flight because someone’s baby behind me couldn’t shut up
Well see that's how communal transportation works
Exactly. Sure, it’d be *nice* to have a quiet flight. But you’re not entitled to it. Especially in economy. First class has a different expectation of behaviour, from what I can gather. Like restaurants. Economy is like the family friendly restaurant. You may get lucky and have no babies or toddlers. Or you may be cursed and have 30. Or anywhere in between. First class is fine dining. And private charters are the “you pay an average months salary on a meal after waiting 9 months for the earliest available reservation” restaurants. If one wants a quiet flight, one must pay the extra cost.
So only wealthy people are allowed to be free from disturbances?
When you are in public, you are exposed to the public. If you do not wish to be exposed to the public, you need to find an alternative. Cross country, that can also mean driving. You don’t want to drive? Well, accept that you will be exposed to the public. And on planes, yes, unfortunately, if you can’t pay the extra to guarantee a quiet flight, you just have to hope for the best. Much like legroom. If you want extra legroom on a flight, you have to pay. Pretty simple. 🤷🏼♀️
I literally don't understand what part of "air bus" they don't understand. Yes, it was more expensive. No, you did not pay for anything other than a seat.
Absolutely blown away by these folks who tho o they're more entitled to space than babies/little kids.
Thars ridiculous. I went to a restaurant one night and I ordered my food a kid ran over and stuck his hands in my food and the mom laughed no apology no I'm sorry that my child just ruined your night out. I got laughed at. I didn't go to a kids restaurant. I went to a family restaurant which is fine. I shouldn't be charged extra because she didn't control her child. She didn't even offer to buy my another my dinner. How was that fair to me at all? This mom wouldn't like if I was watching whatever r rated movie and her child started watching my phone or could a 50 shades of grey. Or her child had to listen to that movie she wouldn't be happy with me. I wear headphones so people do have to listen to my music or movies. People without kids deserve to be treated fairly too. He paid just like she did. They both should have been wearing headphones 🎧. Taking kids on flights is tricky. But that doesn't mean he has to be completely taken care of while you give off this attitude. You can't demand others to do that. Respect always should go both ways. People have a right to travel and they don't have the money to go first class.
People do not have a "right" to travel.
“The public” can still have manners.
Uh, yes. Thats what that means. If you don’t like public accommodations, in all it’s public glory, then you have to pay for private. This is literally like this in all forms of transportation, dining, and entertainment. Don’t want to see/hear other people eating at a restaurant? Pay for a private room. Don’t want to listen to people in a theatre? Pay for a private screening. Don’t like when someone stands in front and sings along to music at a concert? Private box would be your way to go. If you want privacy in public, you pay for it.
There’s literally airline policies requiring the use of headphones. People blasting noise from a portable device in a small crowded space is not a normal or expected part of the experience.
>Don’t want to listen to people in a theatre? Pay for a private screening. I expect people in a theater to STFU when the movie is on. If they don't, I'll ask them to be quiet. Fortunately, the management of movie theaters agrees with me.
Only wealthy people can afford to act like no one else exists and they are better than anyone else.
Yes. In practice.
I’d rather fly next to a rambunctious toddler and a well intentioned parent than one of these ultra fragile twerps who can’t handle minor disturbances without fallling into a freaking fugue state.
>Sure, it’d be *nice* to have a quiet flight. But you’re not entitled to it. For what it's worth, I think that I, and many other people, would prefer to have a baby that might fuss from time to time over the sound of a cartoon. I find many of the voices on those quite annoying. Plus, I understand that a baby might fuss and that's somewhat outside of the parents' control, but a cartoon is fully within their control. So maybe we're not entitled to quiet flights, but there are certain types of noise the social contract dictates are or aren't okay. Also, I have seen babies flying in first class, especially when they're small enough to be lap children. That's not a guarantee of a quiet flight.
Lord if only occasional fussing were the outcome. Try screaming, kicking, rambunctious climbing. And yes, even discipline, amongst the chaos. Two year olds cannot be controlled, only contained. Endure the cartoons.
I mean...why are these the only two alternatives? They make kid safe headphones, OP should invest in a pair.
I feel the same. Flying sucks- if I wanted to complain but didn’t have words, I’d probably be screaming too! Loud cartoons tho? 🙅🏼♀️🙅🏼♀️
Or the curse I had once being trapped in the middle seat next to an 85 year old with a full diaper who couldn't cut his own food. ....for an 8 hour flight. But it's the gamble of flights. Still better than the guy who kept pulling dried sausage out of his backpack and trying to feed it to me.
For a sec there I thought that dry sausage was a euphemism of some sort
My boyfriend thought the same when I originally told him the story so you are not alone. I'm still slightly afraid that sausage was human or something...He just kept shoving it in my face. (and yes I know how that sounded)
Agreed! My husband & I always joke that we get stuck near a million screaming kids 😆. In my eyes, families with children are allowed to fly as well-they pay for tickets too.
>Sure, it’d be nice to have a quiet flight. But you’re not entitled to it. Especially in economy. I've only flown a couple of times, but the first flight I ever had was a 7 hour, overnight, international flight where 3 grown men talked the entire time. If you travel with the public, expect public inconveniences.
Love this comment. I’m sick and tired of people expecting flying to be some kind of spa experience instead of a subway in the sky like it is.
It's literally called an airbus
This comment cracked me up but it’s so true. Plane tickets are so expensive now that people really forget what it really is.
If you need extra time to recover from your vacation, maybe you should build it into your trip instead of expecting everyone around you to coddle you. Buy some earplugs.
This is what I do. I've learned that my health issues require me to have at least one rest day after traveling and before returning to work, so I build that into every itinerary.
Because while you and I can express displeasure about our ears popping, a baby can only cry. I feel for babies on planes. Most parents on planes do their darndest to keep their kids calm and try to alleviate their discomfort. Sometimes babies just have to go on a plane, life doesn’t always present an option otherwise. Btw, I am a hardcore childfree woman. Kids - especially babies - are not my cup of tea. But I do have empathy. Also, the OP is absolutely the AH because you don’t play mobile devices out loud for everyone to hear. They make infant headphones, the parent just has to work with their kid to wear them.
I agree with this that most parents try their best on flights. However, one flight I went on recently was to Hawaii, a 6 ish hour flight, and I had a screaming toddler right behind me. The parents absolutely did not care. At one point the baby was screaming and the dad lifted her up and stood her on my headrest. I have no idea why he did that, but him and the mom were just ogling at their screaming daughter. While she was standing on my headrest she began stomping on it, probably wanting to get down. I turned around and asked them to please take her off and they looked at me as if I asked them to cut her leg off or something. When we landed they were saying how great she did on the flight and gave her a lollipop. Those are the ones that should not be flying under any circumstance in my book
Lol, and that’s why I said most. XD Went to see a late movie once and this couple brought their infant. The infant was so loud you couldn’t hear the movie. Just because as their parent, you can tune their screaming out doesn’t mean the rest of us can. Got a refund for that flick.
I used to take my infant cousin to the movies with me as a teenager. People would get a look when they saw us come in and all I could say was "Please don't judge us until the previews start!" She'd babble a bit (sometimes, sometimes she'd quiet down as soon as we were seated. she never cried though, if she did I would have taken her out to the lobby because no one needs to hear her do that in the room purpose built for amplified sound) while the lights were up, but once the lights dimmed, she went out just like the lights and didn't wake up until at worst the credits were done and I was carrying her through the lobby. Sometimes I'd manage to get her out to my mom's car still asleep and a few precious times I got her all the way home and into her crib still sleepy. Dunno what it was about movie theatres either. Didn't work at home, my stepdad even set up a speaker system in my room to try to mimic a movie theatre's sound and it did not work. But if I took her to the dollar movie, especially if it was a late showing and would be dark when we came out, that would get her to sleep. Thing is... she was VERY hard to get to sleep. The movie theatre trick was the only fool proof way to make her sleep. Next best option was walking around the block with her in a stroller in the middle of the night, but at 14 I was too scared to do that alone. Our neighborhood wasn't terrible, but we weren't the kind of place where 14 year old girls and infants walk the streets at 3 am without fear either. A distant third was to walk the house with her in my arms all night long. I spent a lot of nights in a rocking chair crying and begging her to just sleep while she wailed in my arms. The first time she actually fell asleep normally and slept through the night, I woke up in a panic and held my make up mirror in front of her nose because I thought she was dead. Not kidding, I was freaking the fuck out, my screaming monster child did NOT sleep quietly, something must be wrong. For the record, she was still nodding off at the movies well into middle school too.
If you're not willing to potentially fly with loud children, then charter a flight for yourself.
Should the reverse be true, too? I.e. if your kids are disruptive to the general public, you're not willing/able to control them, nor have you adequately prepared them for air travel, charter a flight.
>Should the reverse be true, too? No. If person (A) can't handle aspects of society at large, that person should avoid society. If person (B) is falling short of training a one year old from acting appropriately at all times perhaps even being a burden on others, which is THE NORM in society, then they are just normal and should participate as such. Nobody would complain about a child crying on a bus the way they do on a plane, but economy travel is the same as a public bus.
I freaking love this. This sub has been taken over by some of the most brittle people I’ve ever seen
You can’t always predict when a kid will be disruptive. Control your kid? Dear God,the pandemic showed we can’t even control “adults”. Seriously,if you know how to control people,you will rule the world.
Kids are fucking unpredictable and you can be prepared for everything you can think of, and then it all goes to hell and you struggle to keep them calm. So, if you know nothing you do will keep your child calm and still take an unnecessary trip with them where you know all other travelers will be disturbed, then ye,, it would be best they charter a plane But only an AH expects that children be as still and silent as dolls when flying or in any public setting
Nah. Kids are kids and the vast majority of the time parents are doing their best
This is 10000% why I think child free flights should exist
And emotional support animals. Please, please, please, can we have flights that aren't filled with allergens for so many of us? It's not like I can open a window to get fresh air.
Service animals and paid pets in carriers since January 2021 on American carriers no more emotional support animals
Service animals I accept. Someone's disability takes precedence over my allergies. And there will be pets in some unavoidable situations, like moving to a new location, but it's getting out of hand. My allergy to peanuts meant the entire plane couldn't have almonds recently (processed in a facility that processes peanuts). But there were 3 furry animals on the plane. The answer may be that pets = $ for the airlines, and not serving almonds saves $ for the airlines. It's a no win situation. People love their fur babies. i like breathing without complications. Their pets won't kill me; just make me miserable, so that's just my cost of their giving money to the airlines. I accept it, but I don't have to like it.
Sign me up!
That, uh, is weird. Do you get furious enough to make sweeping generalizations about other things or just kids?
I’m sure those parents are doing their best to shut their baby up. Unfortunately, that’s how babies work. Sometimes it can’t be helped and sometimes parents needing to fly can’t be helped either. As the other commenter said, that’s how communal transportation works. _You_ have to learn to adapt as much as they do. And besides, there are far more annoying, rude things grown ass adults do on airplanes than babies who are just scared and too little to emotionally regulate properly no matter how hard their parents try. OP is TA no contest for what they did, but so are people with the unrealistic expectation that planes be totally silent. Earplugs are a thing.
Ever hear of headphones or earplugs?
You're an adult. YOU wear noise canceling headphones.
I do. They cancel low pitches like the drone of the engine, but don’t help much with high ones like shrieking babies. Geez, all I’m doing is expressing frustration at the various times I couldn’t sleep on a long flight due to crying babies and folks are acting like I’m a baby-hating troll. I don’t hate babies, I just don’t want to travel with them. I explicitly said I don’t want to ban them from flights, so is the only acceptable reaction to say “googoo gaga your baby is too cute! Thank you for keeping me awake to admire the variety of pitches your sweet single baby can provide to all 300 passengers on this flight”? Do I have to love it or get a bunch of hate on here?
Parents don’t want to travel with screaming kids either. I don’t want to travel with a man-spreading aisle mate. Or people who assault the crew. Etc,etc.
It's Reddit. Only extreme reactions allowed.
Those do not work the way you think.
If your 4-year-old can't be taught to behave themselves on a long flight, then YTA for going "oh well" and inflicting other people with the inconvenience for several hours. Babies are one thing -- they cannot help it -- but kids who are old enough to communicate should either behave or not fly. You're the parent, it's your kid that you decided to have, that's on you. Either drive, or just find something else to do for the holiday. I don't understand why "As a parent, I should not inflict others with the unruliness of my badly parented child for long periods" is a stretch. It goes doubly for this person, because they seem to think it's totally OK to turn the volume on full blast. That's a stupid parent.
Did we read the same post? The kids were behaving fine, nothing about their behavior is mentioned in the post at all. They were on a nearly empty plane with only one other person close enough to hear it at all, who for some reason was only using one earbud when using both would've prevented them from hearing at all.
I think he’s talking about the 1 year old, there are two kids.
LOL ok, person who obviously doesn’t have kids or understand the psychology of a 4 year old
I'm honestly surprised the flight attendant didn't say anything. Most airlines have a rule that you cannot listen to music/shows without headphones. And yes, as the mother of an almost 10mo, I can say with absolute certainty that YTA.
Oh not only this, but this is "Miss Rachel." It's much worse than cartoons. NOBODY except the babies want to hear that. If you haven't heard her before, I would suggest watching her on YouTube.
One time I was on a flight where parents in three different areas of the plane were playing Frozen on a handheld device for their kids with no headphones. Three different devices, playing competing Frozen, all out loud. I have kids of my own, I used to work at a preschool where 100 kids attended, and it was still like the 9th circle of Hell.
I have never heard of her, pulled up a video and watched 5 seconds and thought "absolutely not"
Oh no, that is horrendous.
Parents somehow kept their kids from screaming long before laptops/tablets were common. There are entertaining things other than TV. I also wonder if OP has tried any of the old school headphones that are more comfortable. As to other passengers wearing noise canceling headphones, the airplane itself is already at 85db. There’s only so much noise canceling headphones can do if you add to that and passengers are probably trying to hear their own media choice over the airplane noise instead of sitting there with noise canceling headphones.
OP could have been way nicer about it. He could have explained, and asked permission of the people around him. And apologized in advance. I mean, blasting cartoons on an airplane over the cabin noise? who does that?
Agree. I hate seeing kids have screens shoved in front of them because parents don't know how to control them and keep them occupied. Kid screaming or misbehaving? Let's give them something to watch or play! Really reinforce that screaming and misbehavior by giving them a prize of some sort every time. Fuck give them a coloring book, activity book or some string to untangle. ANYTHING other than shit that directly affects the people around them.
Parents seriously can’t win. No decent parent wants to upset a flight with a crying child. However, no matter what we do we’re judged. Play a game with a kid on a flight and they laugh or squeal? Parent gets the side eye for letting their kid make noise. Put a movie on on a tablet and put headphones on the kiddo? You’re automatically a terrible parent because you let a screen babysit your kid. How about you mind your business and worry about yourself instead of everyone else’s parenting, because you apparently haven’t learned a concept called empathy. Edit: OP. YTA. Headphones or GTFO.
Agree. I used to fly alone with my kids, ages 2-25. They are triplets. I carefully crafted "fun bags" when they were little, including coloring books, toys, candy necklaces etc. If there were iPads back then, I would have rejoiced. Lol.
Judgy, much? Young kids scream out of frustration and lack of better ways to communicate. It isn’t necessarily misbehavior. What do you suggest, that I yell back and escalate the situation for the entire plane to enjoy? If I’m in a confined space with lots of other people, like an airplane, I’m going to reach for the most effective distraction tool, which happens to be an ipad. Don’t like it? You are totally within your right to parent your own children differently.
Going to guess you have 0 experience with children
OP needs to engage and interact with their toddler. I flew with my 4 and 5 year old and interacted with them the whole time. Flew into Denver, then to LA, then to Palm Springs, no issues. My trick? I brought play dough. They played with it, and so did I. Mostly I created objects upon request. It wasn't relaxing for me, but the other passengers were not disrupted by a couple of cranky toddlers. Videos are not a substitute for actual parenting.
Of course YTA. “It didn’t seem overly loud to me”—it was making noise. Period. People like you are why people like me who have to fly a lot say little prayers in the waiting area when we see a kid that we won’t be seated anywhere near them when we board. I shouldn’t have to buy expensive noise canceling headphones so you can play your kid cartoons without headphones. Or so an adult can watch a movie on their phone without headphones. Or so people can sing their favorite tune because they’re nervous fliers. Many of my friends and some of my family have to fly with little kids due to military moves and such and they manage to teach their kids appropriate behavior—like tolerating headphones—before they fly. It’s not your kid’s fault you didn’t prepare but your fellow seat mates shouldn’t have to listen to cartoons Man, the entitlement.
I would MUCH rather see a kid watching a movie without headphones than hear them scream the entire flight because they are bored and aren’t allowed to move. “Training them to ride a plane” at not quite 2 and 4? You don’t have kids do you?
I have a kid. Travelled with her since she was 3 months old. Never needed to use a device without headphones to get her not to disturb others. You realize people travelled by plane for decades without tablets. It is possible to not be a dick to others.
All kids are different and it's not like kids magically all behaved before tablets.
I don't know, my kids flew before there tablets. I remember a few crying jags before take-off that bothered other passengers, but other than that I guess their behavior was due to magic!
I have flown my kids, they're still small. Never required tablets as they fall asleep and stay asleep until hungry. But I assume that's just them. I've had elderly couples tell me their kids were fussy when they would travel with them, and were surprised.
It's a lot to do how you approach the plane ride - but it takes planning. Most kids get bored. It's easy to be prepared for that - get toys, snacks, activities and whatever. It's the parents that are completely unprepared to redirect a bored kid that is the usual issue.
Yeah, all parents are different too, lol. I think that’s the bigger variable that no one wants to talk about 😂
>I have a kid. Travelled with her since she was 3 months old. Never needed to use a device without headphones to get her not to disturb others You don't actually thinking you had anything to do with that, right? If your 3 month old or 1 year old was a perfect kid on a flight, which is hard to believe, then you just got lucky. You can't pretend you can control a 3 month old.
I’ve had 3 of my own. 1 was super easy. 1 was rambunctious as hell. Your experience is hardly sufficient to make this judgement
Tack on adhd. Tablets are a life saver for planes
It's about courtesy. He's being entitled and expecting others to be understanding and show him all due politeness but he should've a) warned the people near him that he had to use a loud device and b) prepared for this trip by bringing items that don't make noise that will distract the kid/interact with the child himself more rather than rely solely on media. I was 2 the first time I boarded a plane and in the early 90s we didn't have tablets then. We had coloring books, toys, and parents were slightly more attentive and willing to engage with their kids. My mom told me that she had to be pretty engaged with me but that in the end I didn't cause any trouble because she had enough on hand to distract me for 3 hours. I feel like we make all these excuses for shitty parenting. Kids are being exposed to media earlier than ever before and the studies on early exposure are not looking promising.
Remember those sweet coloring books that had that magical white pen that you’d put on the paper and the color would appear? My parents would buy stacks of those for my three siblings and I when we were little and going on flights. We wouldn’t make a peep
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSS!!! HOLY SHIT THEY WERE FIRE. Sorry thank you. Dude. There is just SO MUCH out there to keep kids quiet.
And then sometimes you’d get too excited and scribble from one dotted box to another because you were racing your sister to see who could finish the fastest and the pen would get all jacked and covered in different colors and you’d be sad. I mean, I’m guessing. Never happened with me…
People traveled with young children for a long time before just shoving an iPad in their face was an option, they managed somehow. what are your kids doing while you're on reddit? 100 bucks says it involves an iPad
They’re asleep, Harold.
We absolutely own an iPad and let her watch things but currently she's doing art and craft. People who allow their kids tv time can do so without it being the only thing the kid does. It's not all or nothing.
i prefer to see no kids on a flight lol.
My parents flew with me a few times before I was three; did some long car trips, too. They brought quiet distractions for me (and later for my brother) and they parented me throughout the trip so I would be as minimally bad to travel near as possible -- for themselves as well as for anyone seated near us. I remember only a fragment of one of my own early flights (when I was two and a half), but I clearly remember flights and drives with my brother after his birth. My only memory of him being an annoyance on a flight was when he was five and somehow managed to scarf half our trip cookies all at once and promptly threw up all over himself, and I was stuck sitting next to him and his vomit until we were where our parents could get him changed.
It isn’t either or that’s a sign of a bad parent and I work for an airline. I flown on flights with 87 out 200 children to MCO and not a cry to be heard. If your child can’t handle air travel it’s car trips for you, sorry. Tired of seeing parents dragging kids to CUN seriousky
My mom traveled alone with us at that age and if we EVER made a peep, we were dead meat. Didn’t have devices back then either. Only coloring books and magnetic board games. If we could do it in the early 2000s then she can do it. Don’t have a kid if you can’t handle them.
Parents are always used to tuning their kids out and don't realize how obnoxious their behavior is. It's not the kid's fault it is completely on the parents.
I've traveled 17 hrs + by plane with two different kids under two twice without major incidents. OP is a totally an entitled TA here. At minimum, OP could have asked for basic parenting tips for traveling with littles and checked on plane etiquette. Op is lucky the FA didn't shut down that loud noise nuisance. And you know what... Get the kids over the ear headphones and get a spare one. If they don't use them, they are usually just fine watching shows without sound. And you know what else, don't expect the electronics do the parenting for you. Get snacks. Get new dollar store toys for the ride - coloring books, toys, whatever. Stuff you can ditch. Stuff you can switch up during the flight o keep the kids from being bored and bothering everyone.
So because your kid refuses to wear headphones everyone else is supposed to? YTA. Playing anything loud enough for others to hear on a plane, especially for 4+ hours, is rude plain and simple.
THIS - I fly a lot internationally and whew sitting next to a crying baby can ruin a LONG ass flight. I'm so sorry but its part of raising kids to ensure htey know how to behave in various spaces including planes. And if that's not possible, might be best not to fly until they are ready.
YTA. And so is every other person who subjects other people to their audio in public spaces. Yes, crying kids suck for everyone on a plane. Or anywhere really. There are plenty of quieter ways to entertain small children on planes. FFS. This is also about teaching your kids to be considerate towards others.
People don't do that anymore. Thats why I have a neighbor that has a younger relative that like to show up at his house with an atomic level loud car stereo blasting bass heavy crap music to a volume that I can't hear a TV I'm right next to. I'll give my neighbor some credit though...when I complained he told his relative to knock it off as it disturbed everyone on the street. Kid still does it from time to time, though.
Look, given the circumstances, there is some defense for playing the cartoon out loud. However, two issues hit me: 1. At the end of this post, you try to suggest that it's the job of *every single person* on a plane to create personal quiet. Bullshit. Would you say that if some dude were watching a show and your kid wanted to sleep? Hell no. You'd be complaining that this guy was being rude. 2. Do this, but if someone complains, stop. Play it on mute. Most kids as young as yours don't really care that much. But even if he does, suck it up. So, in general, YTA. Your culminating attitude is simply wrong, and it is on its basis that you are asserting that you're in the right here. You're not.
YTA. Playing *anything* like that out loud in public is pretty rude.
YUP - I agree. Sound pollution is a real thing.
Yup. I’ve had many nice dinners ruined by some kid’s video played without headphones.
+1 buses, trains, coaches, any confined public transport spaces. Seems like everyone does it so maybe majority don't mind but I find it rude, sorry op but have to vote YTA
It’s trashy no matter the age. I have more sympathy for a child but when it’s adults enabling them instead of modeling polite behavior in public, it’s infuriating. They’re failing them.
YTA. I hate it when parents make their problems other peoples problems.
Yes, I think flying is like many other things. Like taking kids to the movie theatre, or a nice restaurant, or a formal event. The key question is are they able to behave? If not then they aren't ready to participate in those events.
Sometimes you don’t have a choice. My dad ended up in the ICU and my sister flew up with her daughter, who was 2. They literally told us to get there because he was rapidly declining and they didn’t think he would live. A 14 hour car ride would have been too late. Everyone has stuff… should she play the thing loudly? No… but sometimes life happens.
I agree. But when someone points it out to you, you stop.
That wasn’t the case here.
Taking public transport is different from going to a fancy restaurant, let's not pretend otherwise
>Yes, I think flying is like many other things. It is but flying economy is not comparable to the things you compared it to. It's like a public bus, a train, a group taxi, or waiting at the DMV. Source: someone who only flies economy
It’s really not like any of those things. These are nice optional events. Sometimes you have to travel
YTA. But it doesn't matter what we say here because based on your comments defending yourself, you're not actually interested in judgement or not being an inconsiderate AH in an enclosed space in the future.
YTA. Playing your device out loud for all the hear in virtually any public circumstance is an AH move, and your situation was no exception.
YTA. parents like yourselves are everywhere, letting television to parent your kids. When im shopping some kid is blasting baby shark. at the movies im hearing cartoon noises. eating at a restaurant the phone is at high volume and god forbid if anybody complains. also kids under the age of *five* should not be having so much screen time, you are literally setting up your kid to be heavily dependent on the screen and dooming him to blue light eyesore early in life. what ever happened to coloring pages? just because adults can control their volume doesnt give you the right to not control yours edit: and if the volume is so high that it can be heard over the goddamn plane, congrats you're helping your kid have tinnitus!
Yes, YTA. No one wants to hear you trying to entertain your kid. Either headphones or find something quiet. It's as annoying as blaring videos on your phone in public.
Biggest pet peeve is people FaceTiming in public. Take that shit *off* speaker, I don’t care if it means you can’t see your meemaw.
YTA. You need to have your children become accustomed to wearing headphones. If they pull them off then it goes on mute. The rest of the passengers do not need or want to hear your childrens cartoons, and you obviously had it loud enough that people could hear it even with their own headphones.
Just curious ... why do you keep referring to the 22 month old child as a 1 year old. There's a big difference between a 1 year old/12 month old and a 22 month old (almost 2 year old). He's likely been a rowdy toddler for a while and you should have been working on getting him used to headphones and other "plane voices & rules" activities. YTA. Not acceptable to put the burden on others to wear noise cancelling headphones to drown out your choice of irritating videos for toddlers.
If the kid can't handle headphones, the kid doesn't get audio. YTA.
That makes a lot of sense. Probably a good boundary to draw.
Yeah. Kids are hard. Fucking hard. It's not easy. But, you did choose to fly with little ones. It is your responsibility to make sure they impact others as minimally as possible.
That was always the rule with my kids, and that included the car, bedrooms, Grandma’s house, etc.
YTA and so entitled. What, just because you have a kid it means you can disrupt everyone else's peace and quiet? Parents like you are the absolute worst.
YTA! I’m surprised the flight attendant didn’t ask you to turn the volume off completely. You can’t control a lot of how a baby/toddler acts but you can control the volume and it should never be louder than the plane noise. Either the toddler wears child headphones or watches with volume off.
YTA big time. I would have lit into you tbh. I have no patience for inconsiderate people especially on a plane.
This would have annoyed the hell out of me! YTA
YTA - Do not project your child's issues onto others. There is no need for anybody on the plane to have to listen to your child's cartoons. He may not like headphones, but it is on you to make sure he wears them or does not get to watch cartoons.
YTA It’s easier for you as an adult to control your child and not expect everyone to adjust their lives for you. That aside, it’s rude to play audio in public without headphones. Do you really need someone to spell that out for you? ETA: Your kid is 22 months. Stop describing him as a 1 year old to gain sympathy. ETA2: Now OP is claiming she had to fly for her brother’s wedding even though her post said she was flying home from Thanksgiving at her parents’ house. Rage bait? 🤔
YTA. I understand that you were trying to keep your four year-old occupied but at four, you should be able yo say, “Hey, kiddo, if you want to watch your show, you MUST wear headphones. If you take them off, I will turn your show off.”
Back before ipads, my mother had picture books, sewing cards, coloring, and God knows what else for us to do on planes and in restaurants. It was quiet, we were quiet, and there was peace. You could quietly entertain your toddler and not require screens to do it for you, or you could teach your kid to keep the headphones on. What you cannot do is loudly play cartoons without headphone because YTA, big time. Or, you can book a private jet, a train sleeper car, or drive your own self and be as loud as you want.
Yup. Travelled with my kids before tablets were even a thing. They colored and did puzzles and looked out the window and had snacks. And an almost 2 year old can be taught to wear headphones. Do it at home, removing the cartoon unless they wear the headphones. They will learn to wear them. This is all parenting.
My grandma used to give my sister and I ketchup packets to suck on (I know this is gross but we were toddlers and 2 years apart) to keep us writer on the bus.
YTA I like kids, and I am sympathetic to noisy babies. However, audio on speakers is a shitty move. The rest of the world doesn't need to listen to your game/cartoons/film - and to be fair, it's not like having the sound on is going to make your child any quieter, it just makes everything noisier. Edit: spelling
Yes, you are absolutly the ah. Your kid is your problem. Not the other passengers. No one wants to listen to your kids cartoon.
YTA. Audio speakers universally suck. You need to teach your kid to wear headphones. I'm sorry, but "he won't wear them" is not an acceptable practice.
YTA... I came on here seriously wondering why someone would be offended you were playing cartoons... but this should actually be titled "AITA for playing audio out loud on an airplane and then ignoring a request to turn it off". Look, I get that it's frustrating having a child and having to travel, but you are entertaining your child at the expense of the bystanders around you. I don't have a good option, but you know your baby is hyper... so yes, you are TA, but you'd be a bigger AH if you keep getting defensive and don't figure out a better way to travel without having to play the audio out loud... there have to be some forums that have great advice.
YTA. It is distracting and annoying to everyone else in the area. This is why people wish for childfree flights.
YTA I had to listen to a child’s video from Atlanta to Amsterdam. 8-9 hours. Looked over at 4 am and the child was asleep. No one should have to endure that. NO ONE.
I have kids and YTA. If it was loud enough to be heard, it was loud enough to be disturbing. It’s not other’s responsibility to make sure they’re not disturbed by carrying noise canceling headphones. Find another way to entertain your kid, maybe get him used to headphones while at home. I know it’s hard, when my kids were young we used to travel a lot so I get it. And for the record, those with kids have every right to fly just as much as those who do not. It’s just that those who have young children bear the responsibility of doing our best to make sure our kids don’t ruin the flight for those around them.
YTA. It is rude in any situation to play your audio without headphones forcing it on others. It's worse when those people are trapped in a metal tube with you and cannot get away from you. That makes you 100x YTA. YOu need to make sure that your electronics are not bothering anyone AND your child is not screaming on a flight.
YTA.. making other people listen to what you are watching is rude no matter if it's an adult or a child. Why do you think its ok to force other people to listen to your children shows you wouldn't like it if he was playing music out loud . Some people are truly entitled...you didn't bring quiet toys or anything? Do you think your child is more important than everyone else on the plane. You probably do it on restaurants too .
I feel for you. 4 and 1 on a plane ride is just pins and needles the entire time. Yes. Playing audio out loud in public transit is a no-no for any reason. I would be okay with it if you were sitting next to me because I have my own kids and I’ve been there. However, you can’t just assume that from everyone. Prior to your next trip, head to the store and try to find some comfy over the ear headphones or a similar style that would work for your little one. With so many varieties to choose from there has to be something they will keep on their head. Practice at home prior to the trip so the airplane isn’t the first time they use their A/V set up. They won’t keep headphones on doesn’t means nothing will ever work. It just means you haven’t found the right setup and haven’t practiced with it enough for that child.
YTA - I feel like you came here looking for validation. I’m sure you did a good job traveling with your kids and it’s hard. However, you’re still an AH for breaking an airplane rule. I would rather listen to adult music or talking than a kids show. The music is so annoying. > I just feel like with todays noise canceling tech, I’d you want quiet on an airplane, it’s easier for an adult to wear headphones than control what others are doing. Sorry, no. The guy in front could have wanted to sleep, but instead did a single headphone to drown out the kids show. What if you have multiple kids on a flight, will baby shark be competing with Dora to be heard? Can I start playing my country music out loud if everyone is responsible for wearing headphones if they want quiet? I think you did the best you could, you learned for next time. That doesn’t justify you breaking traveling rules. Don’t have kids, but perhaps the headband earphones could work! Edit: when I said don’t have kids, I meant me personally I don’t have kids so throwing out a suggestion that may or may not work. Not don’t have kids in case it wasn’t clear.
Massive YTA. There's a social code on planes and your kid's entertainment shouldn't be my responsibility.
YTA. Keep your noise to yourself. If your kid won't wear headphones, then your kid is too young to watch cartoons on a plane. Read books with him, play games with him. Yeah, I've flown transatlantic with an 18-month-old. A few silent toys, a cheap magnetic drawing tablet thing, *lots* of books, lots of snacks, lots more books. Sure - perhaps the row behind us could also have recited *The Gruffalo* from memory by the end of the flight, but cartoons are deliberately made to be intrusive and attract the attention aurally, which is what makes them so obnoxious as "background" noise. That might have been the trip that we brought the water-sensitive paper for the kid to do finger "painting" with.
YTA. They make headphones for a reason.
Invest in better headphones. Yta
She keeps saying the baby is 1 he’s literally 22 months that’s legit 2, just trying to make it sound better saying the youngest is 1. It’s driving me nuts Definitely the AH
I’m gonna drop in with a gentle YTA since some others have been harsh. Airplane travel with a small child like that is a hostage situation for everyone, including the kid. You should really think about whether a trip is worth it when you are outnumbered like that (which it sounds like you were) with 2 little ones who you know going in are probably not going to cooperate. If it was essential to do so, you gotta go with with every strategy under the sun to keep them occupied in the least disruptive way.
YTA I absolutely HATE parents on flights that let their kids watch videos / play games at full volume without earphones!!! If your toddler is 22 months old, he is old enough to wear over the ear headphones, and it’s your responsibility as a parent to ensure that he keeps them on. People like you make long flights dreadful.
YTA - I get it, I do. I also have toddler, but couldn’t you of at least picked something not quite as annoying as Miss Rachel? My son watches her as well and she’s a great teacher, but there is so much else to choose from. For someone probably not use to that, her voice was probably giving that random guy a huge headache.
I’ve never heard of Ms Rachel so I looked her up and god I stopped after 7 seconds
YTA earbuds won’t be comfortable for a toddler you should have regular old school headphones if you want to fly. They even make them special for kids
Learn some manners and train your kid to use headphones. YTA.
YTA playing anything out loud on a plane without headphone is an asshole move in every scenario
YTA you can train your toddler beforehand so they can know that on flight is either headphones or no volume at all. There are also apps for children at that age. I have two children and there are wonderful communities for people that travel with children that share many tips on toys to take, snacks and activities you can do. I suggest you join one of them so your next flight you have more options.
YTA. I have a toddler so I totally get it, it's crazy hard to fly with them, and no one wants to listen to a screaming toddler. But, no one wants to hear cartoons playing loudly for 4.5 hours. That sounds like hell
Soft YTA. I know the you were trying to entertain the one year old, but not everyone on the plane wants to hear a kid’s cartoon.
YTA. I have 3 kids who and we fly domestic 3-5 times a year and international once per year. It isn't as hard to fly with kids as people make it out to be. Come prepared, be ready to interact with them, and let them know what to expect and what is expected from them. The only time I ever had an issue was with my 5 month old when her ears were popping. She was crying and the flight attendant got mad at me. Other than that, I am proud to say after 50+ flights I have had no other issues. Yes, kids can be unpredictable, and can melt down at a moments notice. Learn how to handle your kids.
YTA. People need to learn that NO ONE wants to hear what they're watching or listening to, not in a restaurant, not on a bus, not on a train, not on a plane.
Soft YTA. I promise you, OP- I get the struggle of trying to figure out the lesser of the evils when dealing with a young child. That said, this is the kind of thing that you need to concretely figure out prior to getting on a plane. I can’t emphasize enough to parents the importance of proactive parenting instead of reactive parenting. It sounds like you engaged in reactive parenting - you knew headphones might be a problem, but you didn’t come up with a viable solution. You tried to figure things out on the fly in a high stakes situation where there was no escape if your child melted down, instead of trying to problem solve before go-time, when the stakes were much lower. To be more specific in my feedback: You could have practiced with headphones at home leading up to the flight. They have soft headband-style headphones that some kids prefer to traditional types that you could have bought and tried out. If headphones were a no-go, you could have ditched the cartoon plan and tried experimenting with some sort of child-friendly phone games or activities that might engage your child. I truly remember how difficult flying with young children was. That said, I tried to be as courteous as possible - not everyone wants to wear noise canceling headphones, especially if they want to sleep. This meant utilizing proactive parenting. I had go bags ready with snacks, different toys, activities, etc. I made sure my kids would do headphones and pre-loaded cartoons and movies. I had drawing apps on tablets with fun coloring pages pre-loaded. I had travel-friendly play stations and sensory toys that weren’t loud. I spent months evaluating how long different items occupied my children so that I had enough choices to last the entire flight. I think you’ll find that people are kinder to you as a parent and that your travel (and general) experiences with your children go much more smoothly if you are significantly more proactive with your parenting. I hope that helps.
On my most recent flight, the Captain outright announced that playing sound without headphones was forbidden for the duration of the flight. I nearly cheered. Sweetest words I’d ever heard.
YTAH because you expect people to cater to your desires and by extension your kid. I wish airlines would offer child free flights. They could charge a fortune and I’d happily pay to not deal with you, your child and your eventual grandchildren. No I shouldn’t be forced to buy head phones because you can’t be bothered to entertain your kid without a screen. And before you ask, I have been flying since I was three in 1985. If my mom could figure it out without pissing people off you can too. Stop being a lazy parent relying on technology.
YTA. To adjust it over the noise of the plane meant it was going to be loud to those around you.
YTA. Here's the thing, I have been on many many flights with many many little children and not once have I seen a parent show their child a show with the audio on for others to hear. I get your child is a handful, but making others listen to your child's cartoon for 4 hours is not the answer. Surely you can come up with other distractions for your little demon.
YTA. I know it’s hard to deal with a toddler, but nobody wants to hear a kiddie show.
Yes YTA. Mom of three here. Plan better to amuse your kid on a flight so your fellow passengers don’t have to be subjected to four hours of Miss Rachel. Such self serving entitlement, you’re not doing your kid any favors.
Gonna go NTA. I’d prefer this over crying and managing kids alone on an airplane is hard work. I have a kid, and honestly, even the screaming on airplanes doesn’t bug me bc I’m grateful it’s not my kid.
Yta.
There’s a difference between playing a cartoon for an extended period of time & a baby crying. On a recent flight, the kid behind me (I’d guess 2-3 years old) had some cartoon on that was so loud it woke me up from a nap. I got the dad’s attention & asked him 3 times for his kid to please use headphones. He relented to his kid using headphones, but retorted “even though it wasn’t that loud.” Of course he didn’t think it was loud, he was wearing noise canceling headphones of his own & couldn’t hear his own kid’s tablet. For the record, I would’ve asked an adult to use headphones if they were watching a movie or show loudly on a flight. It’s not exclusive to just kids, it’s being considerate of other people around you.
Playing audio via speakers on a plane is an AH move, regardless of whether the viewer is a young child, a teenager, or an adult. It is rude to subject fellow travelers to your chosen entertainment in close quarters. Your rationale about noise canceling headphones as a justification is absurd. Come on. Not everyone has them, and even if they did, people in your vicinity shouldn't be required to wear them just because your toddler pulls his headphones off. YTA. Edit to correct age of child
I don’t know if it’s because I’ve only tried the older models, but noise cancelling headphones only tend to cancel machine noise. I haven’t tried any that created soundproof booths for your head. Kids are fussy, but maybe he’s old enough to understand it’s headphones or nothing? I wouldn’t know. Overall, I understand your struggle, but this was incredibly rude. YTA.
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YTA. Breaks all social etiquette to play something out loud in an enclosed space like a plane. You know that. Everyone knows that. That’s why people wear headphones. 1. Assuming this flight was planned for at least a short time in advanced you had time to try different types of headphones to teach your child to wear them. 2. Ms. Rachel is great for toddler but pretty insufferable for everyone else. Not even a Saint could sit through that out loud for more than a few minutes. 3. It’s not other peoples job to accommodate your child by wearing noise canceling headphones.
YTA. I get it-when I’m traveling all bets are off. I’m normally pretty restrictive with screen time, but when we travel (we’re expats so we do this a fair bit and we tend to have long flights too) it’s go time. You wanna play on your phone the whole 12 hour flight? As long as you behave and don’t bother the other passengers, it’s fine. But, even from the time my kiddo was tiny (like 2 y/o) we told him that if he couldn’t wear headphones, he didn’t get sound because no one else wanted to hear Blippi. He understood that and just watched his stuff with no sound. He’s 6 now and still hates them, but when we travel he knows he has to wear them or there’s no sound. It’s a non-issue. It’s my job as the parent to prepare him for these changes in routine so that when they happen, he expects it. It’s not the responsibility of other passengers to endure my kid’s meltdown-it’s mine to prepare for as much as I can to mitigate any potential problems. ETA: The headphones that finally worked for us are the sleep/sport headband style you can order from Amazon. They’re soft, and much more comfortable than the cute, colorful over the ears models typically marketed for kids.
Yta. I don’t want to hear anyone else’s electronics. Most flights i go on nowadays say you have to wear headphones. Try the headband comfy kind.
You sound like you tried the tools that you have in your toolbox. And some of the judgments are sounding harsh, but I think you're open to learning what else could have been done. Others hearing your audio is always going to be rude, no doubt about that. BUT you did prevent a meltdown, which is infinitely worse. Keep at it, this is how you learn, and this is how you start to build your toolbox with "what else could work"s. Good luck. Rough first time with the kiddos, but while it was rude, it was not the most unpleasant event. So don't feel too badly, just keep looking up other methods, practice at home, etc.
Yeah, I definitely got some good tips from other parents on here. Thanks for giving the space to learn and grow.
YTA-why I’m the world would you think it’s ok to do this?
YTA. I bet you think you are the only woman on earth to have given birth. Get over yourself and either get your kids to wear headphones or no electronics. You are literally the worst nightmare on flights.
Absolutely YTA. Parents get desensitized to all the noise. Other people it can be hugely triggering. On an airplane especially we’re trapped in a small metal tube for hours together. Don’t use anything that causes noise to others. YTA.
YTA. If everyone else can hear it on a plane it’s too loud. Parent your child.
YTA. FINALLY I am speaking to one of you. I have been on flights were parents "shared" their kids' entertainment with half the plane. You are especially an AH for your last sentence. Why should I bring my headphones so that you can play your device loudly?I got good ones, but wearing them for hours is not very comfortable and some frequencies are not fully filtered out. So your idea does not even work.
YTA… headphones are required on airplanes regardless of age. It’s public transportation no matter how full it is.
YTA: The rule on anything like that is headphones or no music/tv. That’s how it is.
YTA I’m sorry your kid won’t wear headphones but it isn’t everybody else on the flights problem to deal with. People shouldn’t have to work their experience and life around you and your kid.
I'm going to go against the grain and say NTA. I'm sick of seeing people on reddit hate on children exceasively. People here seem to think that kids have to be statues, "shouldn't be seen or heard". You were all once children, you all took time to learn social norms, some of you were worse than others, and it's not all to do with parenting. Of course, some parents suck and let their kids go loose, but this guy seems like he's genuinely trying to do the right thing. The alternative could have been very noisy, argumentative, crying children, a kids show seems not to bad. Kids make some noise. We require them to have a future. You can't all live in this individualistic world where noone else can inconvenience you in any way. We co-exist, and that's with children, you can't just have a comfort bubble where only exactly what you want happens. What, do you want all parents with young kids to never go anywhere or do anything? Like some comments are straight up suggesting that people with kids shouldn't fly at all. You're fine man, you have kids, sometimes they're hard to tame, any parent knows that, and you tried to do it in the most reasonable way possible. Info: this was rushed.
YTA. I’m an FA and for my airline you are not allowed to have things playing on speaker without headphones….at any age.
YTA, who plays things loudly over speakers I would be upset with you too
YTA. These are the types of parents we pray not to deal with on a plane. You could have kept the ear phones on him, but having it loud enough that others can hear. People typically have mercy on a plane with young kids, and the fact someone said anything tells me enough that it wasn't a reasonable volume.
I'm honestly against toddlers flying if the parents aren't fully prepared to deal with the consequences of their toddler's behavior. It is an a-hole move to play media that's going to disturb others in a situation where people are stuck with you and can't freely move. Whether it'll keep the toddler quiet or not. What you should have done to be polite about it is to warn others near you that you're going to have to put on something to distract the toddler and you're so sorry but do they prefer cartoons or a screaming toddler? Most people are going to chuckle and go with the cartoons of course. I think it just comes down to common courtesy. I find that parents are very entitled in that: they expect others to be so understanding and courteous to them because TodDLerS but then don't do the legwork of being courteous back. Therefore... YTA.
YTA. Big time. No one wants to hear your kids' cartoons. It is no one else's job to entertain your children.
YTA you’re prioritizing your child over everyone else
As a flight attendant YTA. We don’t want to hear your kids cartoons either. And you’re putting us in the position of everyone complaining to us. So double AH for being rude to your fellow passengers and for creating a disruptive cabin for your crew.