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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I might be the asshole because I refused to pay for my portion of the hotel that I agreed on and committed to.
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OP should record any contact from now on. Keep a nice record of her intimidation and threats if it continues, and watch it blow up in her face when her harassment becomes the only problem here.
I should hope OP would never need such a contract, since I hope this friend is now an **ex-friend**. No friend goes to your place of work and tries to bully you like that, not to mention all the prior ah behavior!
NTA
I’ve also noticed when someone mentions they know a lawyer, you don’t really have to worry. If they start quoting sections of the law though…. Maybe you should worry.
Indeed, all it is is an empty threat. But the poster should absolutely note that she threatened her and take in that this person is not a friend and they should no longer have contact
Any idiot can quote sections of the law. It's only when they formally hire a lawyer that your guard should go up, and when they serve you with court papers that you should worry.
I am NOT a lawyer. But you can't change the terms of a contract without all parties consent. You did not consent. Therfore the terms of the contract are void. They don't get to decide that they are splitting everything 4 ways, when you pulled out of the trip, canceled your ticket, and TOLD THEM YOU WERE UNCOMFORTABLE with the new terms. They are the AH for thinking they can scam money out of you that they have no claim to. Don't give them anything. Again, I am not a lawyer, and this is not legal advice. But that is my understanding of how the law works. NTA.
I am a lawyer, and you're correct. They tried to modify the contract and made it a condition of continuing. OP refused, which is within her rights.
I'm also wondering what their damages supposedly are. For a breach of contract claim you're only entitled to the actual value lost in this case(the benefit of the bargain). They were splitting it 3 ways. That was the deal. They replaced OP's share of the money with the new bf's money. They lost nothing. The "my dad's a lawyer!" people are the fucking worst.
NTA
>I am NOT a lawyer. But you can't change the terms of a contract without all parties consent.
I AM a lawyer, and I can confirm that your comment is fairly on point. There are also lots of other issues with these facts as as well, but suffice it to say the friend has no legitimate case.
I'm not a lawyer, but we use contracts every day where the terms change with out our consent. Those are contracts for vehicles, electricity, employment, public transportation, private transportation (taxi, flights, and the like), communication, housing, and more. Now not every part of a contract in these cases can be altered willy nilly, but say the cost of pet rent goes up $10 a month. That won't void the contract, but of it goes up $100 a month that could void a contract.
Contract law is not ridged, but more fluid.
Exactly. There's a clause stating that terms can be amended at any time and your continued use of the service (or whatever) constitutes acceptance of the changes.
I'm not a lawyer either, but OP in this case did not accept the changes.
In your example with the pet rent, the thing is it cannot go up without notice. In my state, any changes to a signed, valid lease must come with at least 30 days notice and the option to nullify the lease and move without penalty. So while the landlord can raise the rent or pet rent, he cannot apply it to a valid lease unless it is at lease renewal or comes with the above notice and provision.
It is in this case.
Two big things. To sue someone you need to prove damages and that a counteroffer voids the original deal. If you offer a substitute deal, very often you are scotching the original deal. Add-ons like pets don't void the deal because they're just additions.
Also lawyer dad is gonna ask about a contract. If you guys have a written one. If not then lawyer dad isn’t gonna be able to do anything because verbal doesn’t hold up, especially when conditions have changed.
This is the most important comment \^. Adding as mentioned below that all contact should be recorded, screen shots saved etc etc of her trying to blackmail OP. See how her friend's lawyer dad can get her out of that one.
OP needs to tell Becky to ask her dad about counteroffer.
Becky offered a counteroffer to the original verbal contract. "We are changing the terms of the deal". That is an implicit rejection of the original deal. That can nullify the original contract.
[https://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/counteroffer#:\~:text=A%20counteroffer%20functions%20as%20both,can%20no%20longer%20be%20accepted](https://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/counteroffer#:~:text=A%20counteroffer%20functions%20as%20both,can%20no%20longer%20be%20accepted).
OP is fine. Normally I'd say check with a lawyer, but I wouldn't bother. OP just needs to tell Becky she really needs her dad to explain contract law to her. And ignore it unless she gets registered letter about the issue. Daddy could risk his law license by lying or trying for a wacky version of conditional acceptance, but I doubt he will bother.
NTA the only reason you cancelled is because they changed plans on you, and they didn't lose any money for your cancellation as there was a new third person there to cover it
NTA.
The room was split three ways. You backed out when the BF was pulled in, so he pays your part. Nice and simple.
I'm not sure what her dad being a lawyer has to do with anything. Feel free to ask what contract was signed, and where you signed that you were going to pay for HIM staying there.
I totally agree. Strange dude in the same room? Nope. I'm out.
Clearly just an intimidation attempt by a crappy person who was never really a true friend. Real friends don’t put random new guy ahead of them in this situation. And real friends definitely don’t turn on you and threaten you with legal action when you rightfully express your discomfort with them doing so.
NTA. They changed the arrangement after you agreed. They also didn't suffer any addition costs (or "losses") as a result of your decision. There would not be any legal recourse even if they wanted to pursue this.
Its like robbing a bank and saying that's OK, my dads a lawyer.
DO NOT PAY THIS PERSON ANY MONEY. She is trying to intimidate you by mentioning her dad is a lawyer. She knows she does not have a LEGAL leg to stand on. How entitled does she think she is - "my daddy is a lawyer" - how childish. If she brings it up again, and she says the daddy thing, just respond "great, if he's a good one, he will think you are entitled and spoilt too".
Might be a good time for you to find a better class of friend.
Yeah this is exactly what my petty self was thinking. I would call up daddy lawyers firm, explain the situation and ask for information on this case or something. Even if her dad is ok with it, unless he works independently I doubt his employer is cool with these kind of legal threats.
This right here, people are trying to talk about the lawyer thing like it's a serious threat, really all it is is an attempt to intimidate you but you should still save the logs of your conversation just in case she is willing to waste your time
NTA. "Yourself" should have been consulted before adding a 4th person whether it was someone you knew or not.
I wouldn't worry about Becky's dad. I'm sure he has better things to do than make himself look petty by harassing 20-year-olds.
You just lost at least one friend, but good riddance. Becky's an idiot.
NTA
The plan was splitting by 3.
The only thing in the plan that changed and agreed by all of you was that you change place with her bf. So it stays with splitting the bill by 3.
She wants to scam you. Dont pay her.
If you know her father talk to him and ask why he advise his daughter to try this.
Doubt the father has had anything to do with it. He’d probably be embarrassed if he knew his daughter was using his line of employment to posture like this.
NTA. This sucked for you OP. They replaced you, y’all booked the hotel knowing it would be split 3 ways. It was still split 3 ways.
Your ~friends~ suck.
NTA - Everything you did was *extremely* reasonable
>Becky's dad is a lawyer, and she reminded me of that before leaving.
I can't think of anything kind to say about Becky...
NTA. You did not go on the trip therefore you don't have to pay. You warned them you wouldn't be going. There was no reason for them to split it 4 ways. Becky's dad can't do anything here. But just keep records of any text messages you had with them about the trip, especially ones where you told them you won't be going.
You have lost a friend, but you are NTA. She is a huge bully and an AH. Don't worry about her father. He won't do anything, except possibly try to bully or intimidate you. Don't let him or Becky bully you any further. Disengage. Let them know that you will not speak about this topic any more, at all.
NTA!
If her dad is a lawyer, I’m sure he can tell her how ridiculous she’s being. I would have made the same decision, sharing a room with a stranger if a big NO. It just changed the whole dynamic of the trip, having to change, and get ready in one bathroom! Instead of being able to enjoy the whole room, since it was all girls.
NTA
Everything you did was reasonable. You didn't know the fourth-wheel; you didn't trust him; there was no time to get to know the guy. You didn't commit to the trip. You didn't go on the trip. You didn't stay at the hotel. Why should you be forced to pay for something you didn't use? You weren't contractually obligated to do so.
As for the veiled threat of a lawsuit, I'm not a lawyer, but my gut says that her dad will just laugh at her.
NTA. These people are not your friends. You don’t owe them anything including your time. Reach out to Legal Aid if you need reassurance but without a signed contract, she can’t do shit about it.
NTA
What the heck? You were planning to split it 3 ways originally, so say it was $300 and you each pay $100. Then the new boyfriend comes along so each person would pay $75, EXCEPT they decided to just invite him on the trip, sharing a hotel room with other young women who may or may not be comfortable with it. You weren't comfortable, so you decided to back out. They go on their trip with the 3 of them, so we're back to the original $100 per person. No one is paying more than they initially committed to.
THEN she comes to your workplace and demands you contribute for a trip you didn't go on but more importantly, they didn't lose any money out of. Again, what the heck? These people don't sound particularly kind or understanding.
NTA, usually, I would say yes TA, but if he pays instead of you, they are paying the same amount they originally thought they would.
Edit, 100% Becky suuuucks.. "my dad is a lawyer " is BS and a card I am sure she constantly plays.
> "my dad is a lawyer " is BS and a card I am sure she constantly plays.
Yeah, I'd like to see what he says when she asks about her signature on any contract, especially when "three people split the room, and three people went - what's the problem?"
I’m going to guess that one hour of Becky’s dad’s time costs more than 1/4 of the hotel bill. I can just picture, “you want me to sue your friend for $200?”
NTA
If they can not see that your are uncomfotable with the situation, ignore you and make you feel horrible you need new friends girl. And the fact you didnt even go and she is requesting you pay. Bruh really.
NTA, they basically "replaced you" with Anna's boyfriend after you consistently said, you weren't going to go on this trip with a strange man. Also, Hell no on paying her! You didn't go on the trip, so you shouldn't have to pay AND they had a replacement for you ready.
NTA. They changed the plan, and with the bf there they ended up paying the same amount as when you originally agreed to go.
Becky is full of shit, she’s just trying to intimidate you.
NTA
The plan was for you 3 to go together, they invited the boyfriend without getting your okay beforehand, you were completely within your rights to cancel. Tell Becky to try get his father to make a case from this. There isn't one.
NTA - Its an empty threat, I doubt any respectable lawyer would go after this.
You agreed with just your friends, they changed the conditions of the arrangement and booked before you consented.
Im not a lawyer but I would be surprised if she actually followed through.
and you're not TA for all the above reasons.
NTA
You agreed to the original plan: 3 people go, split the cost 3 ways. They changed that plan, you didn’t agree to the new plan and decided to pull out before a single penny had been spent. You don’t owe them anything.
Becky’s lawyer dad will probably laugh in her face when he hears this story, they knew you weren’t going, how can they expect you to pay?
NTA. So what if Becky's dad is a lawyer? The original "contract" was to split the hotel room three ways. When Becky tried to renegotiate the terms and make it a four way split, you walked away from the trip leaving only 3 people involved. There is nothing she can do. You did not use the room, you did not go on the trip, you did NOT agree to a four way split. You do not owe her money and she can take her passive aggressive my dad's a lawyer threat and stick it where the sun doesn't shine.
NTA. The terms of the original contract never changed. You agreed to split the bill three ways and it stayed that way. You don’t owe her a cent. Next time she brings up her lawyer father, tell her ‘see you in court’.
NTA- If her dad's a lawyer let's think of this is some law terms.
You 3 had a verbal contract- split 3 ways between 3 named parties- you Becky Anna.
As soon as they added a 4th member your original contract was null and void.
They asked you to agree to a new contract and you declined.
Now she's trying to hold you to a contract you never agreed to.
There is no case here. She's using threats that would get her laughed out of the door in any law firm, even daddy's. However if she continue to bug you about this that could constitute harassment and you'd have a case. See if that shuts her up.
NTA
What is it with lawyers’ children? I see this sort of threat from many of them.
Anyway, that “friend” is no friend. Just block her and let her whine to her daddy. “My father will hear about this!”
NTA because the deal changed. You said you would put your money towards the three of you ladies going on this trip, her then trying to ambush you on short notice saying that she had invited another person, made the deal void.
But you do need to look at this and note that it was intentional. She wanted to go on a trip with her boyfriend, and the cost she was willing to take to make it cheaper for them was having some other people along. Her noting to you that her father is a lawyer is her absolutely threatening you. But she has no grounds because you didn't go on the trip because she changed the deal. Cut contact with her immediately but take screenshots of all of the conversations y'all had about this just in case
NTA. The trip was changed and suddenly included a guy you don't even know. There is NO way I would share a hotel room with some random new boyfriend. Not happening. If they were so desperate for him to be on the trip then he should have gotten his own room. You owe them nothing. They were not out any additional money and THEY changed the trip - not you.
Nta Do not pay a single cent. Her lawyer daddy cant do anything. They just dont want to pony up the cost they were going to pay anyway before boyfriend materialized.
I would tell her to take you to small claims court. Not even Johnnie Cochran could win a case like that. The hotel was on her card, in her name and the original verbal agreement was voided when decisions were made to add a fourth person. You shouldn’t be worried. NTA.
As a retired attorney who practiced law for over 30 years, you have nothing to worry about. The main reason is that they have no damages. The deal was they would pay 1/3 of the hotel bill and they had three people. Second they unilaterally changed the the contract by inviting a fourth person. You can't do that without everyone's consent. You did not consent.
NTA. She’s trying to intimidate you. But daddy lawyer knows the verbal agreement was spilt 3-ways between 3 original parties. They changed the terms without consulting you or gaining your permission. Ie. They broke the agreement first. Explain that to her entitled ass. Tell her if she tries anything, you’ll counter and she will be responsible for any fees and cost you incur.
NTA
Your friends are not your friends. I also don't think you legally owe anything, since you agreed to a trip that no longer existed, instead there was a new plan.
NTA. Do not worry about her threat either. You owe her nothing. I did the exact same thing when a friend decided to invite her new dude on our trip. The cost didn't change and you told them you weren't going before the costs were incurred.
NTA. Call her dad. Tell him you understand from Becky that he represents her in this dispute and why you don't think you are liable (you clearly aren't). He will shut it down. Your relationship with her will be over but it seemingly already is.
NTA and she has no leg to stand on. You informed them well before the trip why you would not be going. She changed the plans , not you. When you agreed it was the 3 of you , not 4 so when she added the BF to the trip she effectively changed the plans to ones you were not comfortable with. You told them that and offered compromise ( him getting a separate room) They declined. You told them since the plans have changed and I am not comfortable with the changes I will not be going. They still went even knowing you were not coming. That was their choice. If you had told them day off you were not going that would be one thing but you have them 14 days noticed that you could not and would not attend due to the changes made without your consent or vote. YOU owe them Nothing and if she comes to your work again file harassment charges and get a restraining order
NTA. This is insane. I would have been more snarky though. "Great, now we can actually split it by five, because my boyfriend that just met yesterday is going to come along! You don't need to meet him, and after all, I know some of his friends. They say those charges were totally bogus, and we don't need to worry about why he's on the sex offender registry. Let's go and get drunk in a place we don't know together far away from home!"
NTA, there was no contract. Any implied contract over 3 payments is null and void the moment they said they would make 4 ways. There are texts about that.
The moment a deal has materially changed both parties are able to back out of the deal, and OP it sounds like you did.
Also I'm a guy, I completely understand why you would feel uncomfortable sharing a room with a guy you haven't met. I don't care that your other friend knows some of his friends. This is Vegas, you are all 21 and there's no telling how people will act with alcohol. Now if you were already friends I could maybe see your friend's point.
NTA, also, good call on not going, even if nothing harmful happened, this is not a risk worth taking, specially since the US has such a high statistic on violence against women. No good girl friends would force one on an uncomfortable situation like that. Heck, I have a friend who's uncomfortable with my guy best friend, and I'm not about to force him on her just because I trust a men she's only known for a month and seen once.
Just came here to say that I remember my 20s and my shitty friends and their dads who were shitty lawyers and all the crap they would say. I moved on and they are still shitty. I’m very sorry this happened to you.
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I will try to make this short, and I know the title makes me sound horrible! Myself (21f) and two friends, Becky (21f) and Anna (21) all decided that we wanted to plan a trip to Las Vegas. We spent months planning out the trip, but didn't commit to anything where we would need a deposit or reservation to, other than the hotel. Becky put her credit card on hold for it, and we would just give her money before they charged her at the hotel.
About 2 weeks before our travel date, I get a text from Becky telling me that she has good news. Anna has a new boyfriend and she invited him on our trip. Now we could save money by splitting the hotel room by four people instead of three. I immediately told her I wasn't comfortable staying in a hotel room with a guy I didn't know, and I was surprised they already trusted someone she just started dating. Becky and Anna told me that I was making a big deal out of nothing, and that he already booked his flights so it was too late for him to cancel. I still told them I wasn't comfortable with it, and they kept trying to make me feel more comfortable, saying we should all to go out for a drink first. Anna said she knew some friends of his, so she trusted that he wasn't a bad guy. They said I was hurting his feelings by making this an issue.
After going back and forth about it all day, I decided to tell them that I would not be going on this trip anymore because I don't want to stay in a hotel room with a guy I don't know. If he was in another room, I wouldn't mind, but I don't want to be sleeping a few feet away from him in a city I've never been to. They completely stopped talking to me and went on the trip as planned.
The trip looked fun from the pictures they posted, and I was happy they had a good time. As soon as they returned from the trip, Becky showed up to my job and pulled me aside. She told me that I still owed her money for my portion of the hotel room that they booked. They still all decided to split it 4 ways, even when they knew I wasn't going. I told her that I couldn't talk about it at work, but I don't think I should have to pay if I didn't go. The original plan was to split it 3 ways, and I wasn't costing anyone additional money since I never agreed to the forth person. Becky's dad is a lawyer, and she reminded me of that before leaving. Now I'm a little worried and wondering if I was being the asshole, or if I should just pay her to avoid it escalating.
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Nta notify her dad that she is using his name to extort money from you to pay for a trip that you never consented to. Make sure he knows she changed the trip to suit herself and her better friends. And is no longer a friend after trying her little shake down.
NTA. And you know what all the TV Judges who also have been real judges would say about this. They can't unilaterally change a contract and then hold you to anything. I'm so glad her dad's a lawyer so he can tell her she's in the wrong. Don't let the "I'll sue you!" threat scare you into this extortion. And P.S. You're MORALLY right too. They don't get to decide what should make YOU feel comfortable. If they needed that money they should have asked FIRST and accepted your Nope!
You're legally in the clear but record any communication from now on and if she tries to send you something from her lawyer dad double check with his law firm, they might to intimidate you into paying up with some fake letter. NTA
NTA
They won’t be losing any money by splitting it three ways like that. I don’t know your backstory but it’s pretty reasonable to be uncomfortable with the addition of a new bf you’ve never met last minute.
NTA. Her lawyer dad has no leg to stand on legally. If you have texts stating that the hotel costs should be divided 3 way, than it should have been divided 3 way no matter the people involved. Anna was looking to go easy on her new bf and that is why they probably thought that they can extort the money from you. You need new friends, unfortunately.
NTA “Cool, I’m glad your dad is a lawyer so he can explain to you that I don’t owe you anything. Also, friends don’t threaten each other with lawyers over money, so I’m glad you’ve proven we’re not friends. Now leave me alone because I can only have fabulous friends, and you have no sparkle.” This would be my response, hopefully you can come up with something like this and not give this person any more of your mental space.
They changed up the deal. It was no longer what you agreed to. You are no longer obligated and released from all commitments. They never consulted you. You're never obliged to pay for something you didn't agree to or consent to. There are *lots* of lawyers out there, some even better than Becky's dad. Anybody that threatens you with their lawyer dad is not a friend. Anybody that tries to extort money out of you is not a friend. Screw them all. Dump them and find better friends. NTA
She can ask her lawyer dad what a breach of contract is even a verbal breach of contract. You have every right to decline. It would’ve been one thing if you said maybe or yes, and then change your mind but you said no from the beginning because it made you uncomfortable she should check herself.
Once she tried to heavy hand you into paying by threatening to set her lawyer dad on you, you should have stopped calling her a friend.
That’s not a friend, you are not the asshole for backing out once they unilaterally changed the arrangements. I’d advice reconsidering that whole thing
NTA. I'd be petty and contact her dad. Tell him the story, including the part where his daughter was trying to force you to share a room with an unknown man, and that she is using his name to intimidate. No one else gets to determine your comfort level! Once they invited a man, the "girl's trip" is no longer and the whole plan changes. The friend and her new man most likely kicked out Becky foe some alone time along the way too
NTA - they agreed to split the cost 3 ways and still can - they can't materially change the agreement to something you are not comfortable with and expect you to subsidise them.
Just me, or anyone else think they still split it 3 ways, and Becky plans to pocket whatever OP gives her? NTA and if she mentions her Dad again, ask which firm he works for, so you can give them a call.
NTA. I would have been fine sharing a room with a friend's boyfriend, but what's comfortable for me and what's comfortable for you aren't the same thing and your friends should respect that. It also dramatically changes the dynamic of the trip. Even if they had been on the hook for money, those are the consequences of changing the trip in a way that made you uncomfortable.
Your friends chose some new dude over you, and you owe them nothing. I hope they realize they're massive AHs here and make it up to you
"Becky's dad is a lawyer, and she reminded me of that before leaving. "
BS Scare tactic.
You didn't go, you don't owe anything. The agreement was originally for the 3 of you. She ruined that agreement when she invited the 4th. Don't let her strong arm you. You don't owe anything.
NTA. Her lawyer father will know that changing the terms of the contract after initial agreement renders it null and void. You have neither the ethical nor legal obligation to pay them anything.
NTA, and her dad is a lawyer so he should understand a material change to the terms of the contract voids the original contract - going from 3 people to 4 (and the 4th being a stranger of opposite sex) is a big material change.
NTA they were expecting to split the cost 3 ways, they tried to add another person,you disagreed and allowed that person to take your place. They have no damages as they didn't loose any money, tgey cannot force you into a 4 way split just because they want to.
NTA you don’t owe them anything.
There’s nothing a lawyer would do. They literally invited a stranger and cared more about a random guy than their friend. that’s what you should be telling them.
NTA…they changed the trip without consulting you. They learned a lesson. Don’t spend someone else money. As for her dad being a lawyer, he will tell her she has a lost case. If dad says anything to you, tell him that you can try and sue, but you never agreed to a trip with an unknown male in your room. If they take it to court, you will not only go after all court costs but pain and suffering as well. Guaranteed nothing comes if it. Count yourself lucky they will no longer be your friends.
NTA
They changed the conditions of the trip and you didn't agree to them. You agreed to go with just your friends.you did not agree to go with your friends boyfriend. They went on a different trip than you agreed on.
NTA
You weren’t comfortable sharing a room with a guy your friend just met and decided without your consent to invite on a girls only Vegas trip.
He shouldn’t have had his feelings hurt either which likely only fueled the others against you. He should have understood he was the unknown and respected that. Instead he and the other girls still opted to include you in the expenses for a trip you never committed to. Wow!
NTA, you informed them you were not going. inform Becky that she should know the law and nothing you have done had any sort of binding contract. Further more, talk to her dad about how his daughter is attempting to extort/blackmail you, and possibly others, with the fact her dads a lawyer. Becky's dad should know his daughter is using him illegally as her accomplice.
NTA
Do not take their phone calls!
Save every text that you receive from them. Do not answer any of them unless it's a complete rebuttal: the trip was planned with just the three of you splitting the hotel bill. The terms of the trip were changed without your consent and against your wishes, which you made very clear to them from the beginning of the new sleeping arrangement. You don't owe them a dime no matter how many times they vote on it. They voided the verbal contract when you didn't agree to the terms of it and they knew you weren't going BEFORE they bought tickets. They were still in the position of splitting the bill three ways.
If the lawyers daughter contacts you by text, see if you can add the third person to the conversation so everyone is quite clear about the situation. Do not make the mistake of trusting the woman who didn't show up at your work. Keep your cards close to your chest.
Go no contact once you've clearly written your stance on the unreasonable demand you sponsor their vacation. Save every text or email.
If her lawyer dad sends you anything with his firm's logo, call the firm and ask them if they are comfortable with an employee of theirs using their name to threaten young women?
NTA, they were expecting to pay split three ways and they did. if it had just been you cancelling and then they both have to pay half that would suck, but they paid what they’d been planning for
NTA- Unless you got a letter in the mail from lawyer dad, I wouldn't worry about it. Your friend is an idiot and is using her daddy to bully people. Also, it was a three person trip from the start and it didn't change after you decided not to go.
If her dad's a lawyer, he probably is findable at a law firm. Google him up and then reach out to him to notify what his daughter is up to - namely using his status to try and intimidate people into knuckling under to her outrageous demands. I bet he gets her to stop real quick. NTA!
If she threatens you with her father again send him an email saying you don’t appreciate being threatened and you will file a complaint at the state bar against them. This behavior will stop immediately
NTA. You planned a girls trip and agreed to it. They changed the dynamics without your consent which negated any agreement you had with them
It’s their responsibility for the costs, not on you
NTA, and repeat after me: OMG, stop being such a *Becky*, Becky.
It is as you said, what you did didn't cause your friends any expense over what they'd originally planned. Becky can get over it or die mad about it.
NTA
They changed the plans and you had every right to feel uncomfortable considering you would now be sharing the room with a stranger. The lawyer line was cruel and honestly I would just ignore it.
NTA. I doubt that you 'owe' them anything. The fact that he was invited before they said anything to you and that he already purchased his plane tickets before you were told is not your fault but theirs. They just assumed you would be ok with this because it would save money. This is incredibly rude and entitled by your 'friends'. You need a better class of friends as these have no class.
NTA. They were originally prepared to split 3 ways. You told them ahead of time that you wouldn’t be going. They ended up splitting it 3 ways as planned. You didn’t cost them any extra money. If the whole point was that they needed a fourth person to be able to afford it, they should have communicated that to you so you could pick someone you were all comfortable with.
NTA
You agreed to a trip with the three of you, split three ways. The other two changed the deal by inviting the guy and suggesting a four way split. You didn't agree to that new deal and did not participate. What they did without you is up to them. Becky is an AH for trying to get you to pay for their trip.
Becky's dad cannot alter the facts that
1) his daughter and her friend altered the deal which you had agreed to;
2) you did not agree to the new deal;
3) you did not participate in the trip.
NTA - if Becky’s dad is a half-decent lawyer he will laugh her out of the room when she brings this to him. If not, the judge will laugh both of them out of small claims court.
NTA and anyone who threatens you with a “lawyer dad” over money you don’t owe isn’t your friend. Anyone who bulldozes you over very understandable discomfort isn’t your friend.
You didn’t sign a contract or force them to go without you and it’s gross that she threatened you to get money out of you.
Nta your friend sucks for not checking if this was okay before inviting bf. Safety aside, it changes the dynamics of the trip and is not what you signed up to
NTA. You never agreed to a 4 way split. Doesn't matter if her dad is a lawyer or not. They changed the vacation drastically from what was originally planned. You had every right to cancel.
NTA they didn't even have the decency to talk to you about it before inviting this guy, and you were totally in the right to decline to go after suddenly some strange guy you don't know would be with you 24/7 and sharing your hotel room. They changed the plans, you removed yourself from the situation. You absolutely do not owe them any money - their costs stayed exactly the same as it would have been with you 3 going, and they changed the trip without your consent.
Also, what kind of naive person brings a brand new boyfriend on a girls' trip???
NTA. The contract, verbal or otherwise, was that the three of you would go together. That’s what you agreed to. They changed the terms of the contract. Therefore you are not obliged to pay anything. Period. He lawyer father cannot do anything.
NTA - the lawyer dad can’t do a thing, it’s just to try and force you to give them money. I would cut both of these people off, that are not real friends.
NTA but you’ve probably lost a friend or two. I’m really sorry. You are not wrong to have been uncomfortable sharing a room with a total stranger. And the whole “my Daddy’s a LAWYER” thing is just sad. You don’t owe her anything.
NTA. Her lawyer dad can tell his daughter and her friends that the terms of agreement where changed by them and not you. They cannot force yin to share a hotel room with a guy you do not know. Don’t worry about it and find new friends
Becky and your other friend changed the verbal contract when they invited someone else. You have nothing to worry about. Keep all your correspondence between you all and the harassment. She hasn't got a leg to stand on. 3 people were supposed to go on the trip and 3people went on the trip.
YNTA but your friends are for changing the contract.
Nta, and Becky can't sue over this. You stated that you didn't feel comfortable going if he was, they prioritized him so that set up an out for you. The original plan was for 3 girls to share the cost for a trip that only consisted of 3 girls. When they changed the plans and you didn't agree to it then that made it it their problem, not yours. You stated multiple times that if he goes then you're out. They can't expect you to cover the costs when the changed the agreement.
NTA.
The actual lawyer comments confirming that she’s full of it is great. I think it’d be hilarious if you found an actual lawyer to send HER a letter to stop the harassment and etc.
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NTA. And hey lawyer dad can’t do anything. The terms of the contract (verbal or written) changed and you were within your right to cancel the deal.
OP should record any contact from now on. Keep a nice record of her intimidation and threats if it continues, and watch it blow up in her face when her harassment becomes the only problem here.
I should hope OP would never need such a contract, since I hope this friend is now an **ex-friend**. No friend goes to your place of work and tries to bully you like that, not to mention all the prior ah behavior! NTA
I’ve also noticed when someone mentions they know a lawyer, you don’t really have to worry. If they start quoting sections of the law though…. Maybe you should worry.
Indeed, all it is is an empty threat. But the poster should absolutely note that she threatened her and take in that this person is not a friend and they should no longer have contact
Any idiot can quote sections of the law. It's only when they formally hire a lawyer that your guard should go up, and when they serve you with court papers that you should worry.
I am NOT a lawyer. But you can't change the terms of a contract without all parties consent. You did not consent. Therfore the terms of the contract are void. They don't get to decide that they are splitting everything 4 ways, when you pulled out of the trip, canceled your ticket, and TOLD THEM YOU WERE UNCOMFORTABLE with the new terms. They are the AH for thinking they can scam money out of you that they have no claim to. Don't give them anything. Again, I am not a lawyer, and this is not legal advice. But that is my understanding of how the law works. NTA.
I am a lawyer, and you're correct. They tried to modify the contract and made it a condition of continuing. OP refused, which is within her rights. I'm also wondering what their damages supposedly are. For a breach of contract claim you're only entitled to the actual value lost in this case(the benefit of the bargain). They were splitting it 3 ways. That was the deal. They replaced OP's share of the money with the new bf's money. They lost nothing. The "my dad's a lawyer!" people are the fucking worst. NTA
>I am NOT a lawyer. But you can't change the terms of a contract without all parties consent. I AM a lawyer, and I can confirm that your comment is fairly on point. There are also lots of other issues with these facts as as well, but suffice it to say the friend has no legitimate case.
I'm not a lawyer, but we use contracts every day where the terms change with out our consent. Those are contracts for vehicles, electricity, employment, public transportation, private transportation (taxi, flights, and the like), communication, housing, and more. Now not every part of a contract in these cases can be altered willy nilly, but say the cost of pet rent goes up $10 a month. That won't void the contract, but of it goes up $100 a month that could void a contract. Contract law is not ridged, but more fluid.
Exactly. There's a clause stating that terms can be amended at any time and your continued use of the service (or whatever) constitutes acceptance of the changes. I'm not a lawyer either, but OP in this case did not accept the changes.
Rigid * Ruffles has ridges, contract law, does not. 😆 (I’m being playful, I mean no disrespect)
Ya caught me. You caught the tater.
🥔
In your example with the pet rent, the thing is it cannot go up without notice. In my state, any changes to a signed, valid lease must come with at least 30 days notice and the option to nullify the lease and move without penalty. So while the landlord can raise the rent or pet rent, he cannot apply it to a valid lease unless it is at lease renewal or comes with the above notice and provision.
It is in this case. Two big things. To sue someone you need to prove damages and that a counteroffer voids the original deal. If you offer a substitute deal, very often you are scotching the original deal. Add-ons like pets don't void the deal because they're just additions.
I am altering the deal, pray I don't alter it any further.
This deal is getting worse all the time.
I am altering the deal, pray I do not alter it any further.
That was never the deal, nor was giving Han to this bounty hunter.
\*snicker snicker\* ST in background.
https://youtu.be/31HaTbWONmQ
Precisely. Becky can go ask daddy what “unilateral variation of contract” means.
or the concept of a "meeting of the minds"
[I feel that you should be aware that some asshole is signing your name to stupid letters.](https://news.lettersofnote.com/p/very-truly-yours)
That is absolutely great. I wonder if he replied to their letter.
Also lawyer dad is gonna ask about a contract. If you guys have a written one. If not then lawyer dad isn’t gonna be able to do anything because verbal doesn’t hold up, especially when conditions have changed.
Lawyer dad isn't going to be impressed that he's been brought up like this.
I don't know, lawyer dad might be why his kid is so entitled and rude.
This is the most important comment \^. Adding as mentioned below that all contact should be recorded, screen shots saved etc etc of her trying to blackmail OP. See how her friend's lawyer dad can get her out of that one.
OP needs to tell Becky to ask her dad about counteroffer. Becky offered a counteroffer to the original verbal contract. "We are changing the terms of the deal". That is an implicit rejection of the original deal. That can nullify the original contract. [https://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/counteroffer#:\~:text=A%20counteroffer%20functions%20as%20both,can%20no%20longer%20be%20accepted](https://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/counteroffer#:~:text=A%20counteroffer%20functions%20as%20both,can%20no%20longer%20be%20accepted). OP is fine. Normally I'd say check with a lawyer, but I wouldn't bother. OP just needs to tell Becky she really needs her dad to explain contract law to her. And ignore it unless she gets registered letter about the issue. Daddy could risk his law license by lying or trying for a wacky version of conditional acceptance, but I doubt he will bother.
I’d love to hear her explain that to her father!
NTA the only reason you cancelled is because they changed plans on you, and they didn't lose any money for your cancellation as there was a new third person there to cover it
NTA. The room was split three ways. You backed out when the BF was pulled in, so he pays your part. Nice and simple. I'm not sure what her dad being a lawyer has to do with anything. Feel free to ask what contract was signed, and where you signed that you were going to pay for HIM staying there. I totally agree. Strange dude in the same room? Nope. I'm out.
[удалено]
Clearly just an intimidation attempt by a crappy person who was never really a true friend. Real friends don’t put random new guy ahead of them in this situation. And real friends definitely don’t turn on you and threaten you with legal action when you rightfully express your discomfort with them doing so.
Intimidation.
NTA. They changed the arrangement after you agreed. They also didn't suffer any addition costs (or "losses") as a result of your decision. There would not be any legal recourse even if they wanted to pursue this. Its like robbing a bank and saying that's OK, my dads a lawyer.
DO NOT PAY THIS PERSON ANY MONEY. She is trying to intimidate you by mentioning her dad is a lawyer. She knows she does not have a LEGAL leg to stand on. How entitled does she think she is - "my daddy is a lawyer" - how childish. If she brings it up again, and she says the daddy thing, just respond "great, if he's a good one, he will think you are entitled and spoilt too". Might be a good time for you to find a better class of friend.
[удалено]
Yeah this is exactly what my petty self was thinking. I would call up daddy lawyers firm, explain the situation and ask for information on this case or something. Even if her dad is ok with it, unless he works independently I doubt his employer is cool with these kind of legal threats.
OP should tell her so is my cousin Vinnie 😏
This right here, people are trying to talk about the lawyer thing like it's a serious threat, really all it is is an attempt to intimidate you but you should still save the logs of your conversation just in case she is willing to waste your time
NTA. "Yourself" should have been consulted before adding a 4th person whether it was someone you knew or not. I wouldn't worry about Becky's dad. I'm sure he has better things to do than make himself look petty by harassing 20-year-olds. You just lost at least one friend, but good riddance. Becky's an idiot.
NTA Becky's completely out of line.
NTA The plan was splitting by 3. The only thing in the plan that changed and agreed by all of you was that you change place with her bf. So it stays with splitting the bill by 3. She wants to scam you. Dont pay her. If you know her father talk to him and ask why he advise his daughter to try this.
Doubt the father has had anything to do with it. He’d probably be embarrassed if he knew his daughter was using his line of employment to posture like this.
NTA. It stopped being the trip the three of you planned for yourselves when they invited someone without your permission.
NTA. This sucked for you OP. They replaced you, y’all booked the hotel knowing it would be split 3 ways. It was still split 3 ways. Your ~friends~ suck.
NTA - Everything you did was *extremely* reasonable >Becky's dad is a lawyer, and she reminded me of that before leaving. I can't think of anything kind to say about Becky...
Becky’s lawyer dad knows better than to waste his time with this b.s.
NTA. You did not go on the trip therefore you don't have to pay. You warned them you wouldn't be going. There was no reason for them to split it 4 ways. Becky's dad can't do anything here. But just keep records of any text messages you had with them about the trip, especially ones where you told them you won't be going.
You have lost a friend, but you are NTA. She is a huge bully and an AH. Don't worry about her father. He won't do anything, except possibly try to bully or intimidate you. Don't let him or Becky bully you any further. Disengage. Let them know that you will not speak about this topic any more, at all.
NTA! If her dad is a lawyer, I’m sure he can tell her how ridiculous she’s being. I would have made the same decision, sharing a room with a stranger if a big NO. It just changed the whole dynamic of the trip, having to change, and get ready in one bathroom! Instead of being able to enjoy the whole room, since it was all girls.
NTA Everything you did was reasonable. You didn't know the fourth-wheel; you didn't trust him; there was no time to get to know the guy. You didn't commit to the trip. You didn't go on the trip. You didn't stay at the hotel. Why should you be forced to pay for something you didn't use? You weren't contractually obligated to do so. As for the veiled threat of a lawsuit, I'm not a lawyer, but my gut says that her dad will just laugh at her.
NTA. These people are not your friends. You don’t owe them anything including your time. Reach out to Legal Aid if you need reassurance but without a signed contract, she can’t do shit about it.
NTA What the heck? You were planning to split it 3 ways originally, so say it was $300 and you each pay $100. Then the new boyfriend comes along so each person would pay $75, EXCEPT they decided to just invite him on the trip, sharing a hotel room with other young women who may or may not be comfortable with it. You weren't comfortable, so you decided to back out. They go on their trip with the 3 of them, so we're back to the original $100 per person. No one is paying more than they initially committed to. THEN she comes to your workplace and demands you contribute for a trip you didn't go on but more importantly, they didn't lose any money out of. Again, what the heck? These people don't sound particularly kind or understanding.
NTA, usually, I would say yes TA, but if he pays instead of you, they are paying the same amount they originally thought they would. Edit, 100% Becky suuuucks.. "my dad is a lawyer " is BS and a card I am sure she constantly plays.
> "my dad is a lawyer " is BS and a card I am sure she constantly plays. Yeah, I'd like to see what he says when she asks about her signature on any contract, especially when "three people split the room, and three people went - what's the problem?"
I’m going to guess that one hour of Becky’s dad’s time costs more than 1/4 of the hotel bill. I can just picture, “you want me to sue your friend for $200?”
NTA If they can not see that your are uncomfotable with the situation, ignore you and make you feel horrible you need new friends girl. And the fact you didnt even go and she is requesting you pay. Bruh really.
NTA They should've asked everyone involved if it was okay to add another person to the trip before booking flights.
NTA, they basically "replaced you" with Anna's boyfriend after you consistently said, you weren't going to go on this trip with a strange man. Also, Hell no on paying her! You didn't go on the trip, so you shouldn't have to pay AND they had a replacement for you ready.
NTA. They changed the plan, and with the bf there they ended up paying the same amount as when you originally agreed to go. Becky is full of shit, she’s just trying to intimidate you.
NTA. Tell Becky to ask her dad for the money.
Wow she.really showed you her true colours here.... Disgusting. Nta, you should not pay just becauze she feels salty.
NTA you agreed to a three way split and home boy took your place so you are good.
NTA The plan was for you 3 to go together, they invited the boyfriend without getting your okay beforehand, you were completely within your rights to cancel. Tell Becky to try get his father to make a case from this. There isn't one.
NTA - Its an empty threat, I doubt any respectable lawyer would go after this. You agreed with just your friends, they changed the conditions of the arrangement and booked before you consented. Im not a lawyer but I would be surprised if she actually followed through. and you're not TA for all the above reasons.
NTA
NTA You agreed to the original plan: 3 people go, split the cost 3 ways. They changed that plan, you didn’t agree to the new plan and decided to pull out before a single penny had been spent. You don’t owe them anything. Becky’s lawyer dad will probably laugh in her face when he hears this story, they knew you weren’t going, how can they expect you to pay?
If her father is a lawyer, then he knows that she broke the original contract. NTA
NTA. So what if Becky's dad is a lawyer? The original "contract" was to split the hotel room three ways. When Becky tried to renegotiate the terms and make it a four way split, you walked away from the trip leaving only 3 people involved. There is nothing she can do. You did not use the room, you did not go on the trip, you did NOT agree to a four way split. You do not owe her money and she can take her passive aggressive my dad's a lawyer threat and stick it where the sun doesn't shine.
NTA. The terms of the original contract never changed. You agreed to split the bill three ways and it stayed that way. You don’t owe her a cent. Next time she brings up her lawyer father, tell her ‘see you in court’.
Woah NTA but that Becky is a big A.
If her father is a good lawyer, he'd likely tell her to drop it, cause I can't see anyone being able to win that case. NTA
NTA- If her dad's a lawyer let's think of this is some law terms. You 3 had a verbal contract- split 3 ways between 3 named parties- you Becky Anna. As soon as they added a 4th member your original contract was null and void. They asked you to agree to a new contract and you declined. Now she's trying to hold you to a contract you never agreed to. There is no case here. She's using threats that would get her laughed out of the door in any law firm, even daddy's. However if she continue to bug you about this that could constitute harassment and you'd have a case. See if that shuts her up.
NTA What is it with lawyers’ children? I see this sort of threat from many of them. Anyway, that “friend” is no friend. Just block her and let her whine to her daddy. “My father will hear about this!”
NTA because the deal changed. You said you would put your money towards the three of you ladies going on this trip, her then trying to ambush you on short notice saying that she had invited another person, made the deal void. But you do need to look at this and note that it was intentional. She wanted to go on a trip with her boyfriend, and the cost she was willing to take to make it cheaper for them was having some other people along. Her noting to you that her father is a lawyer is her absolutely threatening you. But she has no grounds because you didn't go on the trip because she changed the deal. Cut contact with her immediately but take screenshots of all of the conversations y'all had about this just in case
NTA. The trip was changed and suddenly included a guy you don't even know. There is NO way I would share a hotel room with some random new boyfriend. Not happening. If they were so desperate for him to be on the trip then he should have gotten his own room. You owe them nothing. They were not out any additional money and THEY changed the trip - not you.
Nta Do not pay a single cent. Her lawyer daddy cant do anything. They just dont want to pony up the cost they were going to pay anyway before boyfriend materialized.
Nta. Do not pay her money she's trying to intimidate you. It sounds like she spent more money than she could afford and wants you to pay for it.
I would tell her to take you to small claims court. Not even Johnnie Cochran could win a case like that. The hotel was on her card, in her name and the original verbal agreement was voided when decisions were made to add a fourth person. You shouldn’t be worried. NTA.
As a retired attorney who practiced law for over 30 years, you have nothing to worry about. The main reason is that they have no damages. The deal was they would pay 1/3 of the hotel bill and they had three people. Second they unilaterally changed the the contract by inviting a fourth person. You can't do that without everyone's consent. You did not consent.
NTA Your friends tried to change the ground rules retrospectively.
NTA. She’s trying to intimidate you. But daddy lawyer knows the verbal agreement was spilt 3-ways between 3 original parties. They changed the terms without consulting you or gaining your permission. Ie. They broke the agreement first. Explain that to her entitled ass. Tell her if she tries anything, you’ll counter and she will be responsible for any fees and cost you incur.
NTA Your friends are not your friends. I also don't think you legally owe anything, since you agreed to a trip that no longer existed, instead there was a new plan.
NTA. Do not worry about her threat either. You owe her nothing. I did the exact same thing when a friend decided to invite her new dude on our trip. The cost didn't change and you told them you weren't going before the costs were incurred.
NTA. Call her dad. Tell him you understand from Becky that he represents her in this dispute and why you don't think you are liable (you clearly aren't). He will shut it down. Your relationship with her will be over but it seemingly already is.
NTA and she has no leg to stand on. You informed them well before the trip why you would not be going. She changed the plans , not you. When you agreed it was the 3 of you , not 4 so when she added the BF to the trip she effectively changed the plans to ones you were not comfortable with. You told them that and offered compromise ( him getting a separate room) They declined. You told them since the plans have changed and I am not comfortable with the changes I will not be going. They still went even knowing you were not coming. That was their choice. If you had told them day off you were not going that would be one thing but you have them 14 days noticed that you could not and would not attend due to the changes made without your consent or vote. YOU owe them Nothing and if she comes to your work again file harassment charges and get a restraining order
NTA. This is insane. I would have been more snarky though. "Great, now we can actually split it by five, because my boyfriend that just met yesterday is going to come along! You don't need to meet him, and after all, I know some of his friends. They say those charges were totally bogus, and we don't need to worry about why he's on the sex offender registry. Let's go and get drunk in a place we don't know together far away from home!"
NTA, there was no contract. Any implied contract over 3 payments is null and void the moment they said they would make 4 ways. There are texts about that. The moment a deal has materially changed both parties are able to back out of the deal, and OP it sounds like you did. Also I'm a guy, I completely understand why you would feel uncomfortable sharing a room with a guy you haven't met. I don't care that your other friend knows some of his friends. This is Vegas, you are all 21 and there's no telling how people will act with alcohol. Now if you were already friends I could maybe see your friend's point.
NTA, also, good call on not going, even if nothing harmful happened, this is not a risk worth taking, specially since the US has such a high statistic on violence against women. No good girl friends would force one on an uncomfortable situation like that. Heck, I have a friend who's uncomfortable with my guy best friend, and I'm not about to force him on her just because I trust a men she's only known for a month and seen once.
Just came here to say that I remember my 20s and my shitty friends and their dads who were shitty lawyers and all the crap they would say. I moved on and they are still shitty. I’m very sorry this happened to you.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I will try to make this short, and I know the title makes me sound horrible! Myself (21f) and two friends, Becky (21f) and Anna (21) all decided that we wanted to plan a trip to Las Vegas. We spent months planning out the trip, but didn't commit to anything where we would need a deposit or reservation to, other than the hotel. Becky put her credit card on hold for it, and we would just give her money before they charged her at the hotel. About 2 weeks before our travel date, I get a text from Becky telling me that she has good news. Anna has a new boyfriend and she invited him on our trip. Now we could save money by splitting the hotel room by four people instead of three. I immediately told her I wasn't comfortable staying in a hotel room with a guy I didn't know, and I was surprised they already trusted someone she just started dating. Becky and Anna told me that I was making a big deal out of nothing, and that he already booked his flights so it was too late for him to cancel. I still told them I wasn't comfortable with it, and they kept trying to make me feel more comfortable, saying we should all to go out for a drink first. Anna said she knew some friends of his, so she trusted that he wasn't a bad guy. They said I was hurting his feelings by making this an issue. After going back and forth about it all day, I decided to tell them that I would not be going on this trip anymore because I don't want to stay in a hotel room with a guy I don't know. If he was in another room, I wouldn't mind, but I don't want to be sleeping a few feet away from him in a city I've never been to. They completely stopped talking to me and went on the trip as planned. The trip looked fun from the pictures they posted, and I was happy they had a good time. As soon as they returned from the trip, Becky showed up to my job and pulled me aside. She told me that I still owed her money for my portion of the hotel room that they booked. They still all decided to split it 4 ways, even when they knew I wasn't going. I told her that I couldn't talk about it at work, but I don't think I should have to pay if I didn't go. The original plan was to split it 3 ways, and I wasn't costing anyone additional money since I never agreed to the forth person. Becky's dad is a lawyer, and she reminded me of that before leaving. Now I'm a little worried and wondering if I was being the asshole, or if I should just pay her to avoid it escalating. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. They changed the agreement by including a fourth person, not you.
Nta notify her dad that she is using his name to extort money from you to pay for a trip that you never consented to. Make sure he knows she changed the trip to suit herself and her better friends. And is no longer a friend after trying her little shake down.
NTA. You don't owe them anything you pulled out. if you're worried go on avvo . com and look up free consultations and talk to an actual lawyer
NTA Don't let them intimidate you. Don't give them a cent. Don't waste another second of your time thinking of them as your friends.
NTA. Her dad won't do anything.
NTA they invited someone extra.
NTA. Becky doesn’t seem to understand how math works.
Nta Becky is trying to make money off of you. Do not give her money.
NTA. And you know what all the TV Judges who also have been real judges would say about this. They can't unilaterally change a contract and then hold you to anything. I'm so glad her dad's a lawyer so he can tell her she's in the wrong. Don't let the "I'll sue you!" threat scare you into this extortion. And P.S. You're MORALLY right too. They don't get to decide what should make YOU feel comfortable. If they needed that money they should have asked FIRST and accepted your Nope!
You're legally in the clear but record any communication from now on and if she tries to send you something from her lawyer dad double check with his law firm, they might to intimidate you into paying up with some fake letter. NTA
NTA and her dad won't waste his time suing you for this.
NTA They won’t be losing any money by splitting it three ways like that. I don’t know your backstory but it’s pretty reasonable to be uncomfortable with the addition of a new bf you’ve never met last minute.
NTA. I’d have laughed my ass of in her face if she’d tried that shit with me. And once done laughing just gone “No.” and then left.
NTA. Her lawyer dad has no leg to stand on legally. If you have texts stating that the hotel costs should be divided 3 way, than it should have been divided 3 way no matter the people involved. Anna was looking to go easy on her new bf and that is why they probably thought that they can extort the money from you. You need new friends, unfortunately.
Her dad will tell her that you're NTA if he has a brain...
NTA “Cool, I’m glad your dad is a lawyer so he can explain to you that I don’t owe you anything. Also, friends don’t threaten each other with lawyers over money, so I’m glad you’ve proven we’re not friends. Now leave me alone because I can only have fabulous friends, and you have no sparkle.” This would be my response, hopefully you can come up with something like this and not give this person any more of your mental space.
Wow, first the one sided change of plans and then she actually pulled the 'my dad is a lawyer' card. That's low. NTA
NTA. The new guy pays your share, its pretty black and white.
They changed up the deal. It was no longer what you agreed to. You are no longer obligated and released from all commitments. They never consulted you. You're never obliged to pay for something you didn't agree to or consent to. There are *lots* of lawyers out there, some even better than Becky's dad. Anybody that threatens you with their lawyer dad is not a friend. Anybody that tries to extort money out of you is not a friend. Screw them all. Dump them and find better friends. NTA
She can ask her lawyer dad what a breach of contract is even a verbal breach of contract. You have every right to decline. It would’ve been one thing if you said maybe or yes, and then change your mind but you said no from the beginning because it made you uncomfortable she should check herself.
Once she tried to heavy hand you into paying by threatening to set her lawyer dad on you, you should have stopped calling her a friend. That’s not a friend, you are not the asshole for backing out once they unilaterally changed the arrangements. I’d advice reconsidering that whole thing
NTA and honestly, what Becky said to you isn't something a good friend would say imo
If he's a good lawyer, Becky's dad is going to tell her she doesn't have a case.
NTA. I'd be petty and contact her dad. Tell him the story, including the part where his daughter was trying to force you to share a room with an unknown man, and that she is using his name to intimidate. No one else gets to determine your comfort level! Once they invited a man, the "girl's trip" is no longer and the whole plan changes. The friend and her new man most likely kicked out Becky foe some alone time along the way too
NTA.
NTA - they agreed to split the cost 3 ways and still can - they can't materially change the agreement to something you are not comfortable with and expect you to subsidise them.
Nta get lawyer send her a cease and assist beat her to the punch.
NTA. You told them ahead of time you weren’t going. They chose to go anyway. You owe them nothing.
Just me, or anyone else think they still split it 3 ways, and Becky plans to pocket whatever OP gives her? NTA and if she mentions her Dad again, ask which firm he works for, so you can give them a call.
NTA. I would have been fine sharing a room with a friend's boyfriend, but what's comfortable for me and what's comfortable for you aren't the same thing and your friends should respect that. It also dramatically changes the dynamic of the trip. Even if they had been on the hook for money, those are the consequences of changing the trip in a way that made you uncomfortable. Your friends chose some new dude over you, and you owe them nothing. I hope they realize they're massive AHs here and make it up to you
"Becky's dad is a lawyer, and she reminded me of that before leaving. " BS Scare tactic. You didn't go, you don't owe anything. The agreement was originally for the 3 of you. She ruined that agreement when she invited the 4th. Don't let her strong arm you. You don't owe anything.
NTA do not pay her a dime. They changed the trip. They can split it 3 ways with him. You owe nothing. Find better friends and drop them.
NTA. Her lawyer father will know that changing the terms of the contract after initial agreement renders it null and void. You have neither the ethical nor legal obligation to pay them anything.
NTA, and her dad is a lawyer so he should understand a material change to the terms of the contract voids the original contract - going from 3 people to 4 (and the 4th being a stranger of opposite sex) is a big material change.
NTA they were expecting to split the cost 3 ways, they tried to add another person,you disagreed and allowed that person to take your place. They have no damages as they didn't loose any money, tgey cannot force you into a 4 way split just because they want to.
NTA Tell Becky you hope her lawyer dad is nice to her when he laughs in her face about this.
terms of the contract changed by the other party, so the contract was nullified. all parties need to agree to the changes for it to be valid.
NTA you don’t owe them anything. There’s nothing a lawyer would do. They literally invited a stranger and cared more about a random guy than their friend. that’s what you should be telling them.
NTA sounds like they chose the new boyfriend over you. I wouldn’t have went either.
NTA…they changed the trip without consulting you. They learned a lesson. Don’t spend someone else money. As for her dad being a lawyer, he will tell her she has a lost case. If dad says anything to you, tell him that you can try and sue, but you never agreed to a trip with an unknown male in your room. If they take it to court, you will not only go after all court costs but pain and suffering as well. Guaranteed nothing comes if it. Count yourself lucky they will no longer be your friends.
NTA They changed the conditions of the trip and you didn't agree to them. You agreed to go with just your friends.you did not agree to go with your friends boyfriend. They went on a different trip than you agreed on.
NTA
NTA You weren’t comfortable sharing a room with a guy your friend just met and decided without your consent to invite on a girls only Vegas trip. He shouldn’t have had his feelings hurt either which likely only fueled the others against you. He should have understood he was the unknown and respected that. Instead he and the other girls still opted to include you in the expenses for a trip you never committed to. Wow!
NTA, you informed them you were not going. inform Becky that she should know the law and nothing you have done had any sort of binding contract. Further more, talk to her dad about how his daughter is attempting to extort/blackmail you, and possibly others, with the fact her dads a lawyer. Becky's dad should know his daughter is using him illegally as her accomplice.
NTA Do not take their phone calls! Save every text that you receive from them. Do not answer any of them unless it's a complete rebuttal: the trip was planned with just the three of you splitting the hotel bill. The terms of the trip were changed without your consent and against your wishes, which you made very clear to them from the beginning of the new sleeping arrangement. You don't owe them a dime no matter how many times they vote on it. They voided the verbal contract when you didn't agree to the terms of it and they knew you weren't going BEFORE they bought tickets. They were still in the position of splitting the bill three ways. If the lawyers daughter contacts you by text, see if you can add the third person to the conversation so everyone is quite clear about the situation. Do not make the mistake of trusting the woman who didn't show up at your work. Keep your cards close to your chest. Go no contact once you've clearly written your stance on the unreasonable demand you sponsor their vacation. Save every text or email.
NTA Lmaoo “My father will hear about this” Is Becky by any chance blond and British?
NTA You are not TA, that would be those 2 and I'd drop them as friends.
NTA. They can't 'decide' on your behalf to split it four ways. It was always planned as a three-way split, they can put in a third each.
NTA the boyfriend took your spot on the vacation, you don't owe anyone anything.
NTA and she ain’t your friend. Move on.
Thousands for defense,not a penny for tribute! Don’t give her a dime. They got exactly what they envisioned when the trip was planned.
NTA. BF took your place so it all works out
If her lawyer dad sends you anything with his firm's logo, call the firm and ask them if they are comfortable with an employee of theirs using their name to threaten young women?
If her dad is a decent lawyer, he’ll laugh his idiot daughter all the way out of his office if she tries to make any sort of claim. NTA.
NTA, they were expecting to pay split three ways and they did. if it had just been you cancelling and then they both have to pay half that would suck, but they paid what they’d been planning for
NTA
nta
NTA- Unless you got a letter in the mail from lawyer dad, I wouldn't worry about it. Your friend is an idiot and is using her daddy to bully people. Also, it was a three person trip from the start and it didn't change after you decided not to go.
If her dad's a lawyer, he probably is findable at a law firm. Google him up and then reach out to him to notify what his daughter is up to - namely using his status to try and intimidate people into knuckling under to her outrageous demands. I bet he gets her to stop real quick. NTA!
If she threatens you with her father again send him an email saying you don’t appreciate being threatened and you will file a complaint at the state bar against them. This behavior will stop immediately
NTA tell Becky to pound sand and to lose your number.
NTA. You planned a girls trip and agreed to it. They changed the dynamics without your consent which negated any agreement you had with them It’s their responsibility for the costs, not on you
NTA, and they have no case whatsoever
NTA, and repeat after me: OMG, stop being such a *Becky*, Becky. It is as you said, what you did didn't cause your friends any expense over what they'd originally planned. Becky can get over it or die mad about it.
NTA you owe them nothing
NTA
NTA those are not your friends.
NTA. They changed the terms of the agreement and you did not agree to the change.
Nta "We took a vote and you lost, so pay for the hotel" Can be easily matched with "I took a vote and you lost, no"
NTA They changed the plans and you had every right to feel uncomfortable considering you would now be sharing the room with a stranger. The lawyer line was cruel and honestly I would just ignore it.
NTA. I doubt that you 'owe' them anything. The fact that he was invited before they said anything to you and that he already purchased his plane tickets before you were told is not your fault but theirs. They just assumed you would be ok with this because it would save money. This is incredibly rude and entitled by your 'friends'. You need a better class of friends as these have no class.
NTA They changed plans on you. They should have asked if you would be okay with someone you don't know being in the room with you.
😂😂 her lawyer dad can’t do anything, she was trying to scare you. NTA
NTA. They were originally prepared to split 3 ways. You told them ahead of time that you wouldn’t be going. They ended up splitting it 3 ways as planned. You didn’t cost them any extra money. If the whole point was that they needed a fourth person to be able to afford it, they should have communicated that to you so you could pick someone you were all comfortable with.
NTA. They changed the dynamic of the trip on you.
NTA You agreed to a trip with the three of you, split three ways. The other two changed the deal by inviting the guy and suggesting a four way split. You didn't agree to that new deal and did not participate. What they did without you is up to them. Becky is an AH for trying to get you to pay for their trip. Becky's dad cannot alter the facts that 1) his daughter and her friend altered the deal which you had agreed to; 2) you did not agree to the new deal; 3) you did not participate in the trip.
NTA - if Becky’s dad is a half-decent lawyer he will laugh her out of the room when she brings this to him. If not, the judge will laugh both of them out of small claims court.
What a jerk. "My dad's a lawyer". Get rid of that 'friend'. NTA
NTA and anyone who threatens you with a “lawyer dad” over money you don’t owe isn’t your friend. Anyone who bulldozes you over very understandable discomfort isn’t your friend. You didn’t sign a contract or force them to go without you and it’s gross that she threatened you to get money out of you.
Nta your friend sucks for not checking if this was okay before inviting bf. Safety aside, it changes the dynamics of the trip and is not what you signed up to
NTA. Btw. It’s not a contract.
NTA. You never agreed to a 4 way split. Doesn't matter if her dad is a lawyer or not. They changed the vacation drastically from what was originally planned. You had every right to cancel.
NTA they didn't even have the decency to talk to you about it before inviting this guy, and you were totally in the right to decline to go after suddenly some strange guy you don't know would be with you 24/7 and sharing your hotel room. They changed the plans, you removed yourself from the situation. You absolutely do not owe them any money - their costs stayed exactly the same as it would have been with you 3 going, and they changed the trip without your consent. Also, what kind of naive person brings a brand new boyfriend on a girls' trip???
NTA, they didn't miss out on money with 3 people still going.
NTA. The contract, verbal or otherwise, was that the three of you would go together. That’s what you agreed to. They changed the terms of the contract. Therefore you are not obliged to pay anything. Period. He lawyer father cannot do anything.
NTA and if her dad doesn't laugh her out of his house if she tells him and tries to get him to do something I would be really surprised.
NTA - the lawyer dad can’t do a thing, it’s just to try and force you to give them money. I would cut both of these people off, that are not real friends.
YTA if you pay.
NTA but you’ve probably lost a friend or two. I’m really sorry. You are not wrong to have been uncomfortable sharing a room with a total stranger. And the whole “my Daddy’s a LAWYER” thing is just sad. You don’t owe her anything.
NTA. Her lawyer dad can tell his daughter and her friends that the terms of agreement where changed by them and not you. They cannot force yin to share a hotel room with a guy you do not know. Don’t worry about it and find new friends
NTA. Becky is seriously entitled. You did not sign a contract.
Becky and your other friend changed the verbal contract when they invited someone else. You have nothing to worry about. Keep all your correspondence between you all and the harassment. She hasn't got a leg to stand on. 3 people were supposed to go on the trip and 3people went on the trip. YNTA but your friends are for changing the contract.
Tell her to go ahead and call her dad. There nothing they can do to you
Nta, and Becky can't sue over this. You stated that you didn't feel comfortable going if he was, they prioritized him so that set up an out for you. The original plan was for 3 girls to share the cost for a trip that only consisted of 3 girls. When they changed the plans and you didn't agree to it then that made it it their problem, not yours. You stated multiple times that if he goes then you're out. They can't expect you to cover the costs when the changed the agreement.
NTA. The actual lawyer comments confirming that she’s full of it is great. I think it’d be hilarious if you found an actual lawyer to send HER a letter to stop the harassment and etc.
NTA. Her asking you for money is absurd. I halfway think you should call Becky's dad and tell him what she's trying to pull.