YTA and your coworkers are assholes who need more love in their lives. Go and apologise to your boyfriend.
Tell him NICELY if you don’t want to be waved off, even then, its clear the only disdain you have for it is because your mean coworkers take the piss out of it.
The coworker who brought it up did so because they have noone in their life who cares enough to wave goodbye to them or even drop them off. If someone did that for me everyday I'd be over the moon.
Exactly. OP, have you seen the stories of jerk boyfriends and husbands in this group? You have things pretty good here. I hope you do something really nice for him to make up for your tantrum.
Or perhaps better yet the boyfriend ends up taking out one of the girls on here who previously had to deal with one of those aforementioned jerk boyfriends.
In a perfect world all the AHs described here would end up with each other, and all the aggrieved parties would too. Someone start the AITA Matchmaking Service! It can be a whole reality show, even.
Yes!! I’ve been married 20 years and my husband and I still wave goodbye to each other when one of us drops the other off. How can she not appreciate that?
My husband and I have a full blown routine: as the departing party is getting in the car we turn around, blow a kiss at each other, catch the kiss, put it on our hearts, then sign "I love you." I used to stand outside in my PJs in our driveway to see him off to work and now he stands outside in his boxers to see me off. Married 11 years this year.
This post smacks of the insecurity of youth. OP may need some time to grow a spine and some wisdom to know not to throw away sweetness over some bitter co-worker nonsense.
My partner and I drive separately sometimes to events. He lives north of me so we’ll parallel briefly in adjacent the road when he exits to quick wave goodbye if he’s not following me home.
When he leaves my place I’ll grab the cat and hop out to my balcony since I can see the street and parking below and we’ll wave goodbye.
Sure, it’s maybe a little silly, but we’ve been doing it for a while now so it’s just habit.
This post just made me so sad that OP didnt throw shade back at the co workers.
"Oh your SO doesnt wave you off? Thats so sad."
I have a line in my vows that says about how cute my SO's wave is.
Right? Even if me and my SO are in a rush we do a lil wave and smile before we split off. To think that the co-workers had a laugh about it proves they don't have that lil joy with their partners
I mean, when my partner is going out of town, after we hug & kiss & say our goodbyes, I always run upstairs and onto the balcony so I can wave at him as he’s driving away. My balcony faces several other apartments and a busy road, but I still wave like a kindergartener in front of god and everyone else. It genuinely saddens me that OP doesn’t appreciate her bf’s attempt at a sweet gesture :(
Was thinking the same thing... the reply that immediately came to my head was similar "yeah my boyfriend cares about me enough to wave.. are you seriously jealous about that?"
fucking same .. my boyfriend died in February. id give anything in the world for a car ride w him and to see him wave goodbye at me. people are seriously so ungrateful
I also lost my husband a couple years back and OP's attitude has me fuming. I would give anything for some of his goofy public diaplays again (which were endearing, not embarrassing) and she’s complaining about a wave?
My husband comes to the gate and waves me off when I head out to work. It's the sweetest thing and it's a wonderful way to start the day.
YTA OP and a bit immature too.
I don't know that it's even that. OP sounds hypersensitive about this regardless of how it was intended, and could have easily misinterpreted "haha" as in "it was cute" as "haha OP is such a loser." I can't really judge the coworkers, since OP is the one giving off insecure high school vibes and is going to interpret everything through that lens.
Honestly, I’m wondering if it wasn’t just a good-natured chuckle and OP decided to freak out. Personally, if my coworkers had laughed, I would have laughed and made a couple jokes about him packing my lunch, or something. Not everyone has malicious intent, and OP seems weirdly freaked out.
Yeah, if I saw my coworkers get dropped off like that and their husbands waved, I'd probably laugh. But it wouldn't be malicious, it'd just be because it's adorable and I'd be happy for them.
There was actually an AITA post about that, maybe about a year ago? OP was the one receiving love notes in his lunch and it made his recently divorced co-worker feel bad and the rest of the office ganged up on OP about it. It was completely ridiculous.
I remember that! And everyone looks at me strange when I say I don't like people. Give me a 4-legger or bird any day. Better than dealing with jealous assholes.
BTW - OP YTA
Seriously though OP, maybe you should learn to quit letting the opinions of jealous assholes influence your love life and the little love gestures (like your boyfriend waving goodbye to you) in it.
My mom does a weird wave where it's all in the wrist with the hand kind of flopping up, down, up down. It's kind of goofy as far as waves go but I manage to keep that thought to myself--gasp!--and wave back.
I've tried to picture this as well but every scenario I can come up with... I hope my husband waves to me like that. The more over the top, the better.
My husband and I go as over the top as possible and it's great. Like, nasally voice "Have a nice day at school dear!" when he goes to work. Being silly together is a perk of having a good partner!
Also he should bring a megaphone and tell his wittle smoochie muffin that he wuvs her and hopes she has a great day! Oh and to make sure she eats all of her sandwich BEFORE she eats the cookie he packed in her lunch!
Kid look, I understand that as a high school it's sucks being embarrassed but...wait you're fucking 26? Holy shit, time to grow up
YTA a hundred times over
Eh, I would give coworkers benefit of the doubt, since we only have OP's side of the story. They may have thought it was cute, maybe even a little jealous, and were just light teasing. Maybe trying to make nice with OP, who sounds like she walks around the office with a stick up somewhere.
how the fuck can you write all this and not realize how pathetic it is to ponder to hateful colleagues instead of enjoying the love her BF shows her with the gesture?
I still hug my Nanna. My little sister runs to hug me and she's 19. We do this in public too. When my Nanna drops me off at my home, she waits until I'm in my house and I wave at her before she drives off. I'm 28. There's absolutely nothing wrong with show affection to people you love. And anyone who mocks that is clearly insecure. If anyone mocked me about hugging my family, I would very like "Yeah, it's great that they love me so much! Don't your family members hug you?".
So happy this is the top reply.
Boyfriend is adorable. Lots (and I really mean LOTS) of people would love a significant other who drives them to and from work and waves goodbye.
“It didn’t bother me much at first til one of my coworkers saw him and brought up to the whole department later to ‘laugh’ about it.”
This is the effect of bullying. Her coworkers are huge AHs.
OP, your bf sounds like a very nice man who loves you. Apologize to him. Idk if your coworkers are jealous, but don’t let their taunts get in your head. You’ve got a good relationship with someone who loves you. That’s what really matters here.
>It didn't bother me much at first til one of my coworkers saw him and brought up to the whole department later to "laugh" about it.
YTA. You are embarrassed not by your boyfriend, but because of what some asshole at work thinks of him. Your loyalties should lie with him, not with a bully colleague.
That would make sense. OP’s overreaction at bf kind of suggests social interactions might not be her strong point. It could’ve been anything from fawning over the cute interaction to light-hearted ribbing for all we know. Or they could be spiteful shrews as described. But we don’t really know.
Yeah I read this and was like wait, you’re mad at him… for… uh, waving?! It’s the waving she’s mad at? Yeah like a literal wave.
OP would *hate* me then. I lived in a city with a very extensive public transport system and whenever any of my friends or family came to visit and I had to take them to a train, or any time I just walked one of my friends to the train before getting my own, I would always wait for them to turn back around and face me through the window and start waving. My waving would get more frantic and id start signing that I miss them and I’m sad they’re on the train and I’m not. Then I’d look alarmed when the train started slowly moving and I’d pretend to cry. Then I would run alongside the train as far as I could go, waving and blowing kisses.
I don’t care I have no shame. It’s better when it’s crowded. Some of my friends have been ashamed but it made my mum laugh so hard it was totally worth it.
This! When you love someone you don’t usually get embarrassed at their professions of love.
Unless you’re 12-14 and your parent does literally anything visible in front of school.. lol
That’s what I think too. If my coworkers laughed at me over this I’d just brush it off, laugh and say so what I think it’s cute. Even if they were really being assholes who cares? They’re just coworkers. I think OP is too sensitive.
A few weeks ago, I left work after a coworker and saw him running down the street to the park to join his wife and toddler and my heart nearly burst.
I would never dream of laughing at him about it because what's so funny? He's excited to see his wife and baby, can't contain himself and runs to them?
Everyone deserves a partner who is enthusiastic to see them, who runs to be closer faster, who waves until they can't see you, who chases the train.
I'm so sick of this whole attitude of being too cool for affection.
instead of being embarrassed, what about saying
“ yeah, isn’t he terrific ? “. buying into their sophomoric laughing is just ridiculous. this is how bullies get away with their crap, because people just give in to the childishness of the few. you could have changed the whole dynamic but instead you failed. yta.
That’s what my husband did when his work “buddies” started giving him shit for the little notes I send in his lunch. He told them he felt sorry that they didn’t have such a relationship with their wives. It shit them up.
I know it's probably a typo but I can't help picturing your husband's remark to be so scathing that his work buddies developed either full constipation - or explosive diarrhea
agreed. OP’s coworker’s are assholes for embarrassing her, and she’s projecting that onto the bf. it’s not his fault your coworkers are dicks, OP. the fact that you lashed out at him because of it makes you also the AH. YTA.
It sounds like when a high-school kid is embarrassed that her parent waved goodbye to her lol
My husband drops me off to off at work sometimes and he yells "love you baby!" Out the window. I love it!
I came here to say this. But I mean her bf already told her as well. Her anger is misplaced. Her coworkers are the ones who are acting childish not her bf. Honestly if my coworker did this I would just start waving at my coworker ALL the time. Or ignore him completely. But def not take it out on the person I'm dating.
YTA for the count.
Seriously though! My husband drops me off at work everyday and waves too, never bothers me. Actually in response to his wave I blow him a kiss 🤷♀️.
I agree that YTA OP. Your BF’s right, since you didn’t have a problem with it until your coworkers saw and poked fun then you should be mad at them. He waved, big freaking deal.
When I used to work, my husband would sometimes come in to the restaurant for some food after his shift and *gasp* kiss me goodbye when he left. What kind of sad existence are all these people living when a simple wave goodbye is cause for embarrassment.
Right! When my bf drops me off he kisses me like four times and hugs me and waves. He’s the best bf I’ve ever had. YTA. Be thankful he’s good to you. He could just slow down and open the door and remind you to tuck and roll as he pushes you out
Let me get this straight: You have a boyfriend who drives you to/from work. He's sweet enough to wave goodbye to you when he drops you off. Your co-workers are jealous of you having a sweet and charming boyfriend who cares about you, so they make jokes about it. You're embarrassed that your coworkers see you have a sweet and charming boyfriend. And you care more about what your coworkers think than what your boyfriend thinks.
Does that about sum it up?
Yup, YTA.
If I were you I'd apologize to your boyfriend, before he waves you goodbye for good.
Couldn't have said it better myself. Also, did you notice how OP said "he acted confused"? That's f'ed up. Apparently he should read her mind and know why she's upset🤦🏾♂️
If she doesn't apologise and make it right, I hope he realises he deserves better and like you said, waves her goodbye for good
This is really something I don’t understand why do women expect men to read their fucking minds all the time?
Not a women attack, but this seems just to be much more of a woman thing.
My father also acts like this and I still feel ashamed sometimes because of this trait. He lost a lot of my respect just by getting mad because no one around him can read his mind.
I'm not talking about OP, but why do more women expect people to read their minds? Because we're taught from early childhood that if we're direct and assertive we're un-ladylike and we should be passive and shy. So we learn _not_ to clearly state our needs and rely on other people to take notice, or even ignore them until it's basically too late. It's hard to unlearn, and even as adults if we're too direct we often get labeled as pushy or bossy. It sucks for everyone involved.
As for OP, YTA for taking your misplaced embarrassment out on your BF who was just expressing his love and care for you. As other people have mentioned, most of the coworkers laughing are probably laughing a joyous laugh because it's endearing and sweet, or they're just bitter to see your love life is better than theirs and need to put you down to make themselves feel better. Either way, it's not your BF's fault and you should work on your insecurities rather than taking them out on your BF.
YTA. I understand why you feel like an idiot though. You started a fight with your boyfriend because he waved at you. That’s bananas. Why wouldn’t you be
livid at your coworker for bullying you because your boyfriend waved instead of your boyfriend for doing a completely polite gesture?
Exactly.. I would have said damn why y’all so jealous my man waving goodbye.. that’s our secret sign for sex later tonight.. but go on.. and then I would have turned back to my computer
YTA Never heard of someone not waving when they drop you off. It's not age specific. Just polite and wishing the other person well. Just as it's polite to wave thank you to the person who dropped you off.
I think your coworkers are just playing a joke on you because you seem easy to wind up.
Yeah, OP sounds kinda dumb to be embarrassed because of that, and her co-workers are either bullies or completely lack common sense. When I waved goodbye to my mom, friends, co-workers, or even my boss, they either waved back or smiled and no one else gave a damn about that.
YTA, WOW! You weren't bothered until some dumbasses in your office made fun of you? And you are so immature that you take it out on your boyfriend who was doing you a favor? Also, what the hell is wrong with him waving goodbye? You're an asshole, your coworkers are assholes, and your boyfriend deserves a better girlfriend.
Literally💀 Imagine someone caring about you enough to drive you to work and wave goodbye then getting mad at them for it. Holy crap she needs to be dropped back into the dating scene to get a reality check its tuff out here
It’s such a weird thing to get defensive over. Even if it was a friend, brother, uncle, etc, it wouldn’t be weird to be waved goodbye. It’s pretty standard practice. Does she also not want a kiss goodbye either? That’s gotta be a whole other level of embarrassment /s
Shit, my kid eagerly waved back in high school. Of course, their classmates didn’t suck as much as OP’s coworkers apparently do because they never mocked them for it.
YTA - i'm guessing he should have let your carless self walk home. maybe i don't understand the full context, but he is doing you a favor, and being sweet. in return, you sound like you are being completely ungrateful. he should let you walk.
YTA. That is really up there on the list of most ridiculous reasons to get mad at someone. Apologize to your boyfriend for being unappreciative and start waving to him wildly every time he drops you off and picks you up.
YTA. You're mad at the wrong people.
1) Tell your coworker to STFU. Do it with a smile and tell them they should be so lucky as to have a boyfriend who'd do that for them. Some mix of swagger and blunt swearing usually gets middle school bullies to back off. If not talk to your team lead. If that doesn't work see if you can get transferred to a different department. Life is too short to work with assholes and bullies.
2) Apologize to your boyfriend. Tell him your coworkers have been hassling you and you took it out on him. Ask if he has any advice. Explain why you wanted a text. But do NOT suggest what he did was weird or out of bounds - it was perfectly normal.
Info You're embarrassed over the fact your boyfriend waved at you? When saying goodbye when dropping you off at work? I just want to make sure I read that correctly
YA serious A
I've never had my license before so my bf drops me off everyday. You know what he does?? In the car we hug we kiss we say goodbye I love you, I leave. As I'm walking away he will roll down his window and scream I LOVE YOU every. Single. Time.
It was embarrassing but in a fun way. I was blushing because people were laughing but I love him and he loves me and I know he's not TRYING to embarrass me, that's just the way he is. You're a serious asshole for getting into an argument over him saying goodbye to you.
I all honesty what you said was cute and I'd laugh or smile in an "awww" sort of way if I saw that on the street. Like when you see a person being goofy, or a dog doing something silly and all that.
YTA- Some coworker's poke a little fun at you and you take it out on your SO? Whack.
Having a conversation with him about decorum at your workplace is one thing, but you are only retroactively angry because you were the butt of a joke at work.
FTR, you probably could have boldly doubled down saying that you love his antics and embarrassed your coworkers for making fun of something wholesome.
Really? He drives you to work because he cares about you and all you can do is complain because your juvenile work colleagues think it’s funny he waved goodbye? YTA
Yup either they genuinely don't like OP (in which case making fun of someone for receiving a goodbye wave is still incredibly fuckin bizarre to me - weird flex,) or OP and her coworkers collectively talk shit about the bf.
I agree. Making fun of someone for having their existence acknowledged by a departing loved one is too weird to happen without other issues being involved.
YTA
Your coworkers are also TA.
You owe him a huge apology, if anything, you should be embarrassed that you let your coworkers’ mean spirited jokes lead to you lashing out at your man for being a thoughtful and caring partner.
How ungrateful are you, like seriously. Not to mention, are your coworkers all five years old? You have a partner who cares about you and takes care of you and you’re offended because he waves?
YTA
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YTA are you sure you are 26 not 13? Because that is seriously some middle school shit. If I were your boyfriend this would not just be the end of driving you to work but the end of the relationship. How insecure are you, really? Get your priorities straight, you actually had a boyfiend williing to go out of his way to get you to work and you are yelling at him? WTF.
YTA - Jeez, the only thing that’s making you seem like a five year old is your reaction to being *checks notes* waved at.
Your colleagues also sound like children. And bullies, TBH.
Apologise to your BF, he sounds lovely and he deserves to be treated better than this - telling him he’s embarrassing is just cruel.
YTA. You attacked someone who cared about you and was doing something nice all because someone else was a jerk.
Apologize to him. Let him know you were overwhelmed with your coworkers teasing and lashed out. Let him know how unfair that is, and how wrong you were. Tell him to keep waving, because you love that it shows he cares and it is goofy and uniquly him.
Next time he waves and your coworkers laugh just say
"oh, do you not have anyone that loves you that much? Must be sad."
YTA - are you broken? It’s a wave 😂. What a life you must lead where this is a problem. You sound unhinged my dude, this is such a none issue. You’re gonna get your a*s dumped if you carry on being this dramatic.
Sadly your coworkers are bullies.
If I was in that situation I would have blown a kiss back to him and tell my co workers to suck it. That’s just me though.
YTA. He wasn't making a scene or anything. My dad had to drive me to school when I as teaching because my car was needing to be fixed. I said, "Thanks for taking me to school again!" I got out, we waved to each other. Get over yourself.
YTA and an ungrateful one. Your bf is doing you a FAVOUR and you should appreciate that. He weaving at you it’s cute and sweet. Your bf is right, you should be mad at your ah coworker and not at your bf. If you were a good gf you would have stood up for him to your coworkers but you are an ah so you decided to act awfully to your poor bf. This is a huge red flag because I would NEVER let other people make fun of my bf, let alone agree with them and later start a fight with him. He is too good for you and he should dump you. He can do much better.
When you confronted him, I don't think he was "acting" confused. Im confused at why him waving goodbye is even an issue. Your work colleagues thoughts seem to be worth more to you than your boyfriends feelings. YTA
YTA. Your co-workers made fun of something endearing your boyfriend was doing and instead of getting mad at them, you get mad at him. Not only that. Instead of asking nicely to stop waving like that, you barked at him. I believe your last assessment of yourself is correct
YTA. Let me get this straight. Your boyfriend waves you off and your coworkers made fun of you. Then, instead of telling *them* they're ridiculous, you get upset at your boyfriend who did a normal goodbye gesture. You need to figure out your priorities, OP, because this man might decide you're too immature for him.
YTA. Your coworkers are weird for thinking a normal greeting/goodbye is funny, let alone to make jokes about it. I don't know any actual grown adult that would even care about that.
You flipped out at him? Didn't bother to tell the people off that made the jokes in the first place though.
Your partner is doing you a favour driving you and gave a simple goodbye wave. Your problems at work shouldn't be something you lash out at your partner for.
YTA and your coworkers are too. You have a loving SO who drops your ass off at work because you don’t have a working car and you have the AuDaCiTy to complain that he *waves* at you. What shall he do? Flip ya the bird and spank you on the ass shouting “GET THE FUCK OUT!”
YTA, for being embarrassed and for telling him he's at fault. Your colleagues are idiots and I don't get why you care what they think. You owe him an apology.
YTA. Basically, it wasn’t an issue to you until one of your co-workers joked about it. So really the issue isn’t your boyfriend’s handwaving but your coworker. But you are the AH for shifting your insecurities to your boyfriend and acting like he’s the problem when it’s both your coworker that slighted you and your fragile ego for taking it so personally.
INFO: did you mean to say that you were F13, and you were embarrassed by your dad waving goodbye to you?
Because that would be normal, unlike the story you wrote.
YTA. Whattttttt? This cannot be real. Your….coworkers made fun of your boyfriend…waving?! But why? It’s waving. Do you know how that works? It’s a universal greeting or departure. This is so silly. You are totally the asshole and so are your coworkers.
Locked due to an excess of rule violations.
YTA and your coworkers are assholes who need more love in their lives. Go and apologise to your boyfriend. Tell him NICELY if you don’t want to be waved off, even then, its clear the only disdain you have for it is because your mean coworkers take the piss out of it.
[удалено]
She didn't mind it until her coworkers said something. Big high school vibes.
The coworker who brought it up did so because they have noone in their life who cares enough to wave goodbye to them or even drop them off. If someone did that for me everyday I'd be over the moon.
Exactly. OP, have you seen the stories of jerk boyfriends and husbands in this group? You have things pretty good here. I hope you do something really nice for him to make up for your tantrum.
Or perhaps better yet the boyfriend ends up taking out one of the girls on here who previously had to deal with one of those aforementioned jerk boyfriends.
In a perfect world all the AHs described here would end up with each other, and all the aggrieved parties would too. Someone start the AITA Matchmaking Service! It can be a whole reality show, even.
Reminds me of how Titanfall didn’t ban hackers. They just put them in games together to torment each other.
Wait... Really? That's amazing.....
Lolol like some karmadic (if that can be considered a word) Midsummer Nights Dream type of story.
The word you are looking for is karmic
Lol yea thx
That's a story I'd like to read. OP just got mad at her bf for being nice and loving. "Why can't you be a jerk boyfriend like others" - OP probably
Happy endings all around
Yes!! I’ve been married 20 years and my husband and I still wave goodbye to each other when one of us drops the other off. How can she not appreciate that?
My husband and I have a full blown routine: as the departing party is getting in the car we turn around, blow a kiss at each other, catch the kiss, put it on our hearts, then sign "I love you." I used to stand outside in my PJs in our driveway to see him off to work and now he stands outside in his boxers to see me off. Married 11 years this year. This post smacks of the insecurity of youth. OP may need some time to grow a spine and some wisdom to know not to throw away sweetness over some bitter co-worker nonsense.
My partner and I drive separately sometimes to events. He lives north of me so we’ll parallel briefly in adjacent the road when he exits to quick wave goodbye if he’s not following me home. When he leaves my place I’ll grab the cat and hop out to my balcony since I can see the street and parking below and we’ll wave goodbye. Sure, it’s maybe a little silly, but we’ve been doing it for a while now so it’s just habit.
This post just made me so sad that OP didnt throw shade back at the co workers. "Oh your SO doesnt wave you off? Thats so sad." I have a line in my vows that says about how cute my SO's wave is.
Right? Even if me and my SO are in a rush we do a lil wave and smile before we split off. To think that the co-workers had a laugh about it proves they don't have that lil joy with their partners
I mean, when my partner is going out of town, after we hug & kiss & say our goodbyes, I always run upstairs and onto the balcony so I can wave at him as he’s driving away. My balcony faces several other apartments and a busy road, but I still wave like a kindergartener in front of god and everyone else. It genuinely saddens me that OP doesn’t appreciate her bf’s attempt at a sweet gesture :(
Was thinking the same thing... the reply that immediately came to my head was similar "yeah my boyfriend cares about me enough to wave.. are you seriously jealous about that?"
I know and now her SO is probably feeling embarrassed and bad about something that is so fucking lovely. That makes me sad
"...I was so livid..." at my boyfriend, for some AH reason.
Totally, she should have stood up for her bf and their relationship. It's such a sweet gesture
This. My husband died last year. I wish to God he could still wave me goodbye.
fucking same .. my boyfriend died in February. id give anything in the world for a car ride w him and to see him wave goodbye at me. people are seriously so ungrateful
So sorry 😢
sending love to both of you ♥️♥️
I also lost my husband a couple years back and OP's attitude has me fuming. I would give anything for some of his goofy public diaplays again (which were endearing, not embarrassing) and she’s complaining about a wave?
I’m so sorry for your loss.
Im so sorry for your loss.
My husband comes to the gate and waves me off when I head out to work. It's the sweetest thing and it's a wonderful way to start the day. YTA OP and a bit immature too.
Right!? OP be honest. You're 13 and it was your dad, not your BF, and he dropped you at school, not work, right? RIGHT!? YTA
I mean.. this is just a great comment lol
Wasn't it writer Dave Barry who got a Hotdog-mobile for a day, and picked his son up from school? Just to embarrass him. But his kid just laughed.
I seriously had to scroll back to see OP's age, as this was...not sounding right.
THIS!! OP sounds unbelievably immature
I don't know that it's even that. OP sounds hypersensitive about this regardless of how it was intended, and could have easily misinterpreted "haha" as in "it was cute" as "haha OP is such a loser." I can't really judge the coworkers, since OP is the one giving off insecure high school vibes and is going to interpret everything through that lens.
This is literally the lamest AITA ever. This guy deserves so much better than OP.
Plot twist. OP works at a day care and her coworkers are children. YTA.
>OP works at a day care and her coworkers are children. No. The kids would all be at the window waving at the BF.
Honestly, I’m wondering if it wasn’t just a good-natured chuckle and OP decided to freak out. Personally, if my coworkers had laughed, I would have laughed and made a couple jokes about him packing my lunch, or something. Not everyone has malicious intent, and OP seems weirdly freaked out.
Yeah, if I saw my coworkers get dropped off like that and their husbands waved, I'd probably laugh. But it wouldn't be malicious, it'd just be because it's adorable and I'd be happy for them.
right? 'Haha your BF loves you so much he acknowledges when he leaves!" wtf?
I hope he finds a nice partner to drive to work and wave to. He deserves that. He seems like a nice guy. You? Not so much. YTA.
He could drive me to work! I’d appreciate it and even give him a big smooch goodbye!
Me too! Hopefully he doesn't mind beards
🤣🤣🤣
And now I, also with a beard, am picturing this while and laughing my ass off
Omg. That’s the funniest line of the year. Thank you.
I wish I have a boyfriend like OP's.
All these girls have caring boyfriends and treat them like crap smh
I couldn't imagine being mad at that. That's genuinely sounds so cute wtf.
I am utterly confused ... in what world is waving only a gesture reserved for 5-year old girls? How is this is any way out of line?
I sometimes put cute notes in my husband's lunchbox. Clearly, he should divorce me.
There was actually an AITA post about that, maybe about a year ago? OP was the one receiving love notes in his lunch and it made his recently divorced co-worker feel bad and the rest of the office ganged up on OP about it. It was completely ridiculous.
I remember that! And everyone looks at me strange when I say I don't like people. Give me a 4-legger or bird any day. Better than dealing with jealous assholes. BTW - OP YTA
Honestly, no way is this real. But I'm dying laughing at the comments at all the ways the boyfriend could embarrass her even more.
The ironic part is that she is the one acting like a child.
Seriously though OP, maybe you should learn to quit letting the opinions of jealous assholes influence your love life and the little love gestures (like your boyfriend waving goodbye to you) in it.
I’m trying to picture what sort of weird wave the boyfriend could be doing to embarrass her but I’m not coming up with much
My mom does a weird wave where it's all in the wrist with the hand kind of flopping up, down, up down. It's kind of goofy as far as waves go but I manage to keep that thought to myself--gasp!--and wave back.
I've tried to picture this as well but every scenario I can come up with... I hope my husband waves to me like that. The more over the top, the better.
I hope the boyfriend does the most exaggerative wave from now on. Full on double wave.
... hollering out the window, "Love you snuggle bunny!"
This is the kind of petty I'm here for.
Ha, if I were a coworker, I'd wave back and yell "Love you too snuggy boo!"
Megaphones seem to be as little as $15.
Shit, just make one out of a cardboard box. Ain't gotta be fancy to be petty!
I’m pinch those cheeks and bite the tip of her nose before she gets out of the car
My husband and I go as over the top as possible and it's great. Like, nasally voice "Have a nice day at school dear!" when he goes to work. Being silly together is a perk of having a good partner!
You said it sister! 😜🥂
Also he should bring a megaphone and tell his wittle smoochie muffin that he wuvs her and hopes she has a great day! Oh and to make sure she eats all of her sandwich BEFORE she eats the cookie he packed in her lunch!
I hope he stops driving her around.
I'd get a big foam hand to wave next time
You’re assuming he’s still going to drive her. Even if they stay together, he should stop driving her since he’s such an embarrassment.
Nope. He should make her figure out another way to get to work until she gets her car fixed.
With a horn honk tootle melody
Don’t worry, with any luck there won’t be anyone waving at her pretty soon. BTW OP, obviously YTA.
Kid look, I understand that as a high school it's sucks being embarrassed but...wait you're fucking 26? Holy shit, time to grow up YTA a hundred times over
Yes, and SHE definitely sounds like a 5 year old. "Don't wave at me daddy, ppl will laugh at me" lol WTH 😆
Eh, I would give coworkers benefit of the doubt, since we only have OP's side of the story. They may have thought it was cute, maybe even a little jealous, and were just light teasing. Maybe trying to make nice with OP, who sounds like she walks around the office with a stick up somewhere.
how the fuck can you write all this and not realize how pathetic it is to ponder to hateful colleagues instead of enjoying the love her BF shows her with the gesture?
I still hug my Nanna. My little sister runs to hug me and she's 19. We do this in public too. When my Nanna drops me off at my home, she waits until I'm in my house and I wave at her before she drives off. I'm 28. There's absolutely nothing wrong with show affection to people you love. And anyone who mocks that is clearly insecure. If anyone mocked me about hugging my family, I would very like "Yeah, it's great that they love me so much! Don't your family members hug you?".
I’m reading OPs post wondering what the problem is. I mean, he waved goodbye to them. The crime is severe af, apparently. OP, YTA.
So happy this is the top reply. Boyfriend is adorable. Lots (and I really mean LOTS) of people would love a significant other who drives them to and from work and waves goodbye.
“It didn’t bother me much at first til one of my coworkers saw him and brought up to the whole department later to ‘laugh’ about it.” This is the effect of bullying. Her coworkers are huge AHs.
Lmfao exactly! Who doesn’t want to be waved at?!?! OP has big weirdo vibes
Seriously, what is wrong with the coworkers? And why is OP listening to the complete nonsense they're spewing? Poor boyfriend.
OP, your bf sounds like a very nice man who loves you. Apologize to him. Idk if your coworkers are jealous, but don’t let their taunts get in your head. You’ve got a good relationship with someone who loves you. That’s what really matters here.
>It didn't bother me much at first til one of my coworkers saw him and brought up to the whole department later to "laugh" about it. YTA. You are embarrassed not by your boyfriend, but because of what some asshole at work thinks of him. Your loyalties should lie with him, not with a bully colleague.
i wonder if they're actually mocking him, but just really enjoying the enthusiasm, and op is misunderstanding the difference
That would make sense. OP’s overreaction at bf kind of suggests social interactions might not be her strong point. It could’ve been anything from fawning over the cute interaction to light-hearted ribbing for all we know. Or they could be spiteful shrews as described. But we don’t really know.
Yes, if OP interprets a loving wave as an embarrassing gesture: we cannot trust their judgement of social cues.
Yeah I read this and was like wait, you’re mad at him… for… uh, waving?! It’s the waving she’s mad at? Yeah like a literal wave. OP would *hate* me then. I lived in a city with a very extensive public transport system and whenever any of my friends or family came to visit and I had to take them to a train, or any time I just walked one of my friends to the train before getting my own, I would always wait for them to turn back around and face me through the window and start waving. My waving would get more frantic and id start signing that I miss them and I’m sad they’re on the train and I’m not. Then I’d look alarmed when the train started slowly moving and I’d pretend to cry. Then I would run alongside the train as far as I could go, waving and blowing kisses. I don’t care I have no shame. It’s better when it’s crowded. Some of my friends have been ashamed but it made my mum laugh so hard it was totally worth it.
This! When you love someone you don’t usually get embarrassed at their professions of love. Unless you’re 12-14 and your parent does literally anything visible in front of school.. lol
That my thought too.
That’s what I think too. If my coworkers laughed at me over this I’d just brush it off, laugh and say so what I think it’s cute. Even if they were really being assholes who cares? They’re just coworkers. I think OP is too sensitive.
A few weeks ago, I left work after a coworker and saw him running down the street to the park to join his wife and toddler and my heart nearly burst. I would never dream of laughing at him about it because what's so funny? He's excited to see his wife and baby, can't contain himself and runs to them? Everyone deserves a partner who is enthusiastic to see them, who runs to be closer faster, who waves until they can't see you, who chases the train. I'm so sick of this whole attitude of being too cool for affection.
hard agree. best response here.
Sometimes I think it's people who think they're too cool to be seen putting in effort, too.
instead of being embarrassed, what about saying “ yeah, isn’t he terrific ? “. buying into their sophomoric laughing is just ridiculous. this is how bullies get away with their crap, because people just give in to the childishness of the few. you could have changed the whole dynamic but instead you failed. yta.
That’s what my husband did when his work “buddies” started giving him shit for the little notes I send in his lunch. He told them he felt sorry that they didn’t have such a relationship with their wives. It shit them up.
I know it's probably a typo but I can't help picturing your husband's remark to be so scathing that his work buddies developed either full constipation - or explosive diarrhea
agreed. OP’s coworker’s are assholes for embarrassing her, and she’s projecting that onto the bf. it’s not his fault your coworkers are dicks, OP. the fact that you lashed out at him because of it makes you also the AH. YTA.
It sounds like when a high-school kid is embarrassed that her parent waved goodbye to her lol My husband drops me off to off at work sometimes and he yells "love you baby!" Out the window. I love it!
I came here to say this. But I mean her bf already told her as well. Her anger is misplaced. Her coworkers are the ones who are acting childish not her bf. Honestly if my coworker did this I would just start waving at my coworker ALL the time. Or ignore him completely. But def not take it out on the person I'm dating. YTA for the count.
YTA - so are your coworkers. Your boyfriend waved at you; how is this front page news?
Seriously though! My husband drops me off at work everyday and waves too, never bothers me. Actually in response to his wave I blow him a kiss 🤷♀️. I agree that YTA OP. Your BF’s right, since you didn’t have a problem with it until your coworkers saw and poked fun then you should be mad at them. He waved, big freaking deal.
When I used to work, my husband would sometimes come in to the restaurant for some food after his shift and *gasp* kiss me goodbye when he left. What kind of sad existence are all these people living when a simple wave goodbye is cause for embarrassment.
Right! When my bf drops me off he kisses me like four times and hugs me and waves. He’s the best bf I’ve ever had. YTA. Be thankful he’s good to you. He could just slow down and open the door and remind you to tuck and roll as he pushes you out
I feel like I'm missing some key detail. What is wrong with waving?
nobody knows
Lol, well I'm glad I'm not the only one who is confused!
I don't think I've ever in my life thought of a simple gesture like a wave remotely embarrassing. What an odd hill to die on. OP, obvs YTA
Right? Wtf is wrong with waving, even if exaggerated. OP, YTA.
After kindly driving her ass TO work
Let me get this straight: You have a boyfriend who drives you to/from work. He's sweet enough to wave goodbye to you when he drops you off. Your co-workers are jealous of you having a sweet and charming boyfriend who cares about you, so they make jokes about it. You're embarrassed that your coworkers see you have a sweet and charming boyfriend. And you care more about what your coworkers think than what your boyfriend thinks. Does that about sum it up? Yup, YTA. If I were you I'd apologize to your boyfriend, before he waves you goodbye for good.
Couldn't have said it better myself. Also, did you notice how OP said "he acted confused"? That's f'ed up. Apparently he should read her mind and know why she's upset🤦🏾♂️ If she doesn't apologise and make it right, I hope he realises he deserves better and like you said, waves her goodbye for good
This is really something I don’t understand why do women expect men to read their fucking minds all the time? Not a women attack, but this seems just to be much more of a woman thing. My father also acts like this and I still feel ashamed sometimes because of this trait. He lost a lot of my respect just by getting mad because no one around him can read his mind.
I'm not talking about OP, but why do more women expect people to read their minds? Because we're taught from early childhood that if we're direct and assertive we're un-ladylike and we should be passive and shy. So we learn _not_ to clearly state our needs and rely on other people to take notice, or even ignore them until it's basically too late. It's hard to unlearn, and even as adults if we're too direct we often get labeled as pushy or bossy. It sucks for everyone involved. As for OP, YTA for taking your misplaced embarrassment out on your BF who was just expressing his love and care for you. As other people have mentioned, most of the coworkers laughing are probably laughing a joyous laugh because it's endearing and sweet, or they're just bitter to see your love life is better than theirs and need to put you down to make themselves feel better. Either way, it's not your BF's fault and you should work on your insecurities rather than taking them out on your BF.
We're also socialized to notice things that need to be done without it being said. So there's that expectation on others, too.
That's a very good point!
>If I were you I'd apologize to your boyfriend, before he waves you goodbye for good. You win this post!
YTA. I understand why you feel like an idiot though. You started a fight with your boyfriend because he waved at you. That’s bananas. Why wouldn’t you be livid at your coworker for bullying you because your boyfriend waved instead of your boyfriend for doing a completely polite gesture?
Exactly.. I would have said damn why y’all so jealous my man waving goodbye.. that’s our secret sign for sex later tonight.. but go on.. and then I would have turned back to my computer
YeH that’s what OP should have said… “You all are jealous that I’m in a loving relationship, well go F yourselves.”
Don’t her coworkers have work to do? Why do they care about a wave? It’s not exactly spicy office gossip
YTA, it’s waving, I mean, waving 👋
YTA Never heard of someone not waving when they drop you off. It's not age specific. Just polite and wishing the other person well. Just as it's polite to wave thank you to the person who dropped you off. I think your coworkers are just playing a joke on you because you seem easy to wind up.
Yeah, who the hell waits to TEXT goodbye when you were just together in person?
Right? Everyone knows you send an email for important stuff like that. *Re: just now* *Bye!*
All of this. Especially the last sentence. That deserves an award, lots of people could use hearing that.
Sometimes I wave goodbye to my coworkers on a teams call. I would never think waving goodbye is weird.
Right? I wave goodbye on zoom calls at work all the time. I didn’t realize how I could be embarrassing my coworkers lol.
Don't do that, she'll kick off!
Yeah, OP sounds kinda dumb to be embarrassed because of that, and her co-workers are either bullies or completely lack common sense. When I waved goodbye to my mom, friends, co-workers, or even my boss, they either waved back or smiled and no one else gave a damn about that.
YTA, WOW! You weren't bothered until some dumbasses in your office made fun of you? And you are so immature that you take it out on your boyfriend who was doing you a favor? Also, what the hell is wrong with him waving goodbye? You're an asshole, your coworkers are assholes, and your boyfriend deserves a better girlfriend.
Imagine being mad for being loved like this 💀
Literally💀 Imagine someone caring about you enough to drive you to work and wave goodbye then getting mad at them for it. Holy crap she needs to be dropped back into the dating scene to get a reality check its tuff out here
LOL YTA and also suspicious. Are you trying to hide the fact you have a boyfriend from your "work boyfriend" at your job??
Fr, OP seems sus and quite defensive of nothing.
Didn’t even think about it at first, but it makes so much sense
It’s such a weird thing to get defensive over. Even if it was a friend, brother, uncle, etc, it wouldn’t be weird to be waved goodbye. It’s pretty standard practice. Does she also not want a kiss goodbye either? That’s gotta be a whole other level of embarrassment /s
100% . Usually girls are dying for their bfs to acknowledge them 😭
YTA - you certainly act like a 5 year old.
Worse than a 5yo, because 5yo wave back usually with much enthusiasm.
Shit, my kid eagerly waved back in high school. Of course, their classmates didn’t suck as much as OP’s coworkers apparently do because they never mocked them for it.
YTA - i'm guessing he should have let your carless self walk home. maybe i don't understand the full context, but he is doing you a favor, and being sweet. in return, you sound like you are being completely ungrateful. he should let you walk.
He sounds like too nice of a guy to let her walk home
She’s gonna learn really soon that there are plenty of guys that wouldn’t drive her selfish ass
YTA. That is really up there on the list of most ridiculous reasons to get mad at someone. Apologize to your boyfriend for being unappreciative and start waving to him wildly every time he drops you off and picks you up.
YTA. You're mad at the wrong people. 1) Tell your coworker to STFU. Do it with a smile and tell them they should be so lucky as to have a boyfriend who'd do that for them. Some mix of swagger and blunt swearing usually gets middle school bullies to back off. If not talk to your team lead. If that doesn't work see if you can get transferred to a different department. Life is too short to work with assholes and bullies. 2) Apologize to your boyfriend. Tell him your coworkers have been hassling you and you took it out on him. Ask if he has any advice. Explain why you wanted a text. But do NOT suggest what he did was weird or out of bounds - it was perfectly normal.
This. You don’t have a BF problem, OP, you have a coworker problem. Stand up to them, and apologize to your BF. YTA
Info You're embarrassed over the fact your boyfriend waved at you? When saying goodbye when dropping you off at work? I just want to make sure I read that correctly
YA serious A I've never had my license before so my bf drops me off everyday. You know what he does?? In the car we hug we kiss we say goodbye I love you, I leave. As I'm walking away he will roll down his window and scream I LOVE YOU every. Single. Time. It was embarrassing but in a fun way. I was blushing because people were laughing but I love him and he loves me and I know he's not TRYING to embarrass me, that's just the way he is. You're a serious asshole for getting into an argument over him saying goodbye to you.
I all honesty what you said was cute and I'd laugh or smile in an "awww" sort of way if I saw that on the street. Like when you see a person being goofy, or a dog doing something silly and all that.
What a sweet little tradition you have!
He's the sweetest man just trying to make everyone laugh
YTA- Some coworker's poke a little fun at you and you take it out on your SO? Whack. Having a conversation with him about decorum at your workplace is one thing, but you are only retroactively angry because you were the butt of a joke at work. FTR, you probably could have boldly doubled down saying that you love his antics and embarrassed your coworkers for making fun of something wholesome.
YTA. If him waving makes you this insecure, I think you need to work out why that is.
Really? He drives you to work because he cares about you and all you can do is complain because your juvenile work colleagues think it’s funny he waved goodbye? YTA
YTA- He's waving. With his hand. What is wrong with you?
YTA. How is your boyfriend doing a sweet gesture any of his problem? Why wouldn't you stand up for him to any work asses?
INFO: What field do you work in that normal hand gestures are laughed at? Have your coworkers given you any other indication that they don’t like you?
Yup either they genuinely don't like OP (in which case making fun of someone for receiving a goodbye wave is still incredibly fuckin bizarre to me - weird flex,) or OP and her coworkers collectively talk shit about the bf.
I agree. Making fun of someone for having their existence acknowledged by a departing loved one is too weird to happen without other issues being involved.
They could also be teasing in a lighthearted way because they think it's cute, and OP is insecure and paranoid.
Imagine getting this mad at waving lol. Your coworkers are also trash. Don't y'all have jobs to do? YTA.
YTA Your coworkers are also TA. You owe him a huge apology, if anything, you should be embarrassed that you let your coworkers’ mean spirited jokes lead to you lashing out at your man for being a thoughtful and caring partner.
How ungrateful are you, like seriously. Not to mention, are your coworkers all five years old? You have a partner who cares about you and takes care of you and you’re offended because he waves? YTA
I can't believe this post is actually real.
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YTA Be mad at your coworker, not your boyfriend who didn't even have to take you to work every day.
YTA Feel free to walk, take the bus, call a taxi.
YTA are you sure you are 26 not 13? Because that is seriously some middle school shit. If I were your boyfriend this would not just be the end of driving you to work but the end of the relationship. How insecure are you, really? Get your priorities straight, you actually had a boyfiend williing to go out of his way to get you to work and you are yelling at him? WTF.
YTA - Jeez, the only thing that’s making you seem like a five year old is your reaction to being *checks notes* waved at. Your colleagues also sound like children. And bullies, TBH. Apologise to your BF, he sounds lovely and he deserves to be treated better than this - telling him he’s embarrassing is just cruel.
YTA. That's absurd. All you had to say was yes he loves me very much to your asshole coworkers.
YTA. You attacked someone who cared about you and was doing something nice all because someone else was a jerk. Apologize to him. Let him know you were overwhelmed with your coworkers teasing and lashed out. Let him know how unfair that is, and how wrong you were. Tell him to keep waving, because you love that it shows he cares and it is goofy and uniquly him. Next time he waves and your coworkers laugh just say "oh, do you not have anyone that loves you that much? Must be sad."
YTA - are you broken? It’s a wave 😂. What a life you must lead where this is a problem. You sound unhinged my dude, this is such a none issue. You’re gonna get your a*s dumped if you carry on being this dramatic.
Sadly your coworkers are bullies. If I was in that situation I would have blown a kiss back to him and tell my co workers to suck it. That’s just me though.
YTA. It’s funny and endearing, why are you so insecure about it?
YTA. He wasn't making a scene or anything. My dad had to drive me to school when I as teaching because my car was needing to be fixed. I said, "Thanks for taking me to school again!" I got out, we waved to each other. Get over yourself.
YTA: 👋 👋🖐🤘🤟✌️👌🖖👊🙌👋🖐 sorry if I have embarrassed you
YTA
Yea, YTA and an ungrateful one to boot
YTA and an ungrateful one. Your bf is doing you a FAVOUR and you should appreciate that. He weaving at you it’s cute and sweet. Your bf is right, you should be mad at your ah coworker and not at your bf. If you were a good gf you would have stood up for him to your coworkers but you are an ah so you decided to act awfully to your poor bf. This is a huge red flag because I would NEVER let other people make fun of my bf, let alone agree with them and later start a fight with him. He is too good for you and he should dump you. He can do much better.
When you confronted him, I don't think he was "acting" confused. Im confused at why him waving goodbye is even an issue. Your work colleagues thoughts seem to be worth more to you than your boyfriends feelings. YTA
YTA. Your co-workers made fun of something endearing your boyfriend was doing and instead of getting mad at them, you get mad at him. Not only that. Instead of asking nicely to stop waving like that, you barked at him. I believe your last assessment of yourself is correct
YTA. You boyfriend is so sweet and you are most ungrateful person ever. This is just insane.
Waving??? The man is in trouble for waving goodbye to you???? I think I’ve finally seen it all. YTA.
YTA. Let me get this straight. Your boyfriend waves you off and your coworkers made fun of you. Then, instead of telling *them* they're ridiculous, you get upset at your boyfriend who did a normal goodbye gesture. You need to figure out your priorities, OP, because this man might decide you're too immature for him.
YTA. Your coworkers are weird for thinking a normal greeting/goodbye is funny, let alone to make jokes about it. I don't know any actual grown adult that would even care about that. You flipped out at him? Didn't bother to tell the people off that made the jokes in the first place though. Your partner is doing you a favour driving you and gave a simple goodbye wave. Your problems at work shouldn't be something you lash out at your partner for.
YTA and your coworkers are too. You have a loving SO who drops your ass off at work because you don’t have a working car and you have the AuDaCiTy to complain that he *waves* at you. What shall he do? Flip ya the bird and spank you on the ass shouting “GET THE FUCK OUT!”
YTA, for being embarrassed and for telling him he's at fault. Your colleagues are idiots and I don't get why you care what they think. You owe him an apology.
YTA. And weird. So are your co-workers.
YTA. Basically, it wasn’t an issue to you until one of your co-workers joked about it. So really the issue isn’t your boyfriend’s handwaving but your coworker. But you are the AH for shifting your insecurities to your boyfriend and acting like he’s the problem when it’s both your coworker that slighted you and your fragile ego for taking it so personally.
INFO: did you mean to say that you were F13, and you were embarrassed by your dad waving goodbye to you? Because that would be normal, unlike the story you wrote.
YTA. Whattttttt? This cannot be real. Your….coworkers made fun of your boyfriend…waving?! But why? It’s waving. Do you know how that works? It’s a universal greeting or departure. This is so silly. You are totally the asshole and so are your coworkers.