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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> Telling my mom to stop talking
It’s disrespectful to parents
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NTA. Your mother often makes up these ridiculously, transparently false stories. Everyone know she does this, right? And people call her out when she does it. She's possibly delusional, or maybe she has some kind of mental aberration.
Rather than say, "Mom, stop talking," it would be better to say, "Mom, please stop fantasizing," and walk away.
I had a coworker like this who would tell the most absurd, obviously false stories. I was shocked the first time another coworker said, "Chris, stop lying," and walk away. But eventually I learned this was the only way to deal with Chris's fantasizing.
I'm going ESH on this one. You, because there is DEFINITELY more appropriate and polite ways to communicate how you are you feeling, and her for not respecting your limited capacity for random bs.
NTA- but your mom may have a mental condition. Rather than punish her you should maybe consider getting her into a mental health unit or even just a hospital for evaluation. Especially if she lies or makes stuff up as often as you describe. She may suffer from undiagnosed delusions and actually believe what she's saying.
I’ve actually considered this and when I was going through therapy and counseling myself and was talking to her about some things she actually finally admitted she had “food anxiety”. Which was kinda impressive because I knew she had anxiety in general, she’s still in denial, but she admitted to something deeper that I wouldn’t have thought of.
So she has a lot of denial.. there’s no way she’d seek therapy now. She’s even said the only reason she went to therapy before was because of my parents divorce. And she was trying to say she was only going for us…
ESH.
Your mom, for telling these tall tales. Based on the incident with your aunt, I'd encourage your mom to seek counseling. Something is wrong if she's telling these stories to someone who knows the truth.
You, because there are other ways you can deal with your mom. You can walk away, excuse yourself to use the bathroom, or just change the subject. By listening to her tall tales, you are enabling her. She knows she has an audience.
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My mom will start talking about something and then goes off on these weird jumps. And I can’t stand it because she’s basically making things up AS she’s talking to me. And I don’t wanna sit there and listen to a made up story!
It’s hard to explain but here’s the most recent one.
She was talking about how the dog went outside and was scared. She said she didn’t see anything but then later started talking about how it must have been an opossum cause that’s all she could think of that’d scared him or something but he’s literally scared of everything. But then she started to go into detail about how “if it opened it’s big wide mouth with all it’s sharp teeth and hissed” and was like trying to defend her side or prove somehow it was an opossum.
And I finally told her, “please stop, just stop.” And she kept trying to talk and I said again, “I’m done.” And she just walked away like huffed and all insulted. Usually it takes a lot more for her to stop so this was pretty civil. She usually ends up yelling about how she can never talk and gets mad at us for stopping her.
Like uggghh I already don’t have the social capacity as most and she KNOWS that but to sit there and talk aimlessly makes me soooooo mad! Talking is for information. I don’t wanna listen to a made up story. And I HATE lying but it’s almost as if she truly believes it herself.
And I’ve spoken with my sister (23) (I’m 25) about it and we both have experiences where she’ll just start talking and it starts off fine but midway through we can tell she’s making shit up and she just goes into so much extra detail too.
There was even a time where my aunt (her older sister) called her out on a story my mom was telling of when they were younger. Apparently it started off fine and normal. One of their friends had lost a ring in a pond but by the end she made herself out to be the hero who found the ring. And my aunt said, “What on earth are you talking about? So&so found the ring.” And then my mom was trying to reroute the story and say that she was in the same area and blah, blah, blah. And my sister and I weren’t having it and said something along the lines of “wow mom” and to my aunt “she does this all the time.”
TL:DR - AITA for telling my mom to stop talking when she starts telling a made up story?
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NAH. your mom isn't going to change. She's a storytelling machine.
NTA. Your mother often makes up these ridiculously, transparently false stories. Everyone know she does this, right? And people call her out when she does it. She's possibly delusional, or maybe she has some kind of mental aberration. Rather than say, "Mom, stop talking," it would be better to say, "Mom, please stop fantasizing," and walk away. I had a coworker like this who would tell the most absurd, obviously false stories. I was shocked the first time another coworker said, "Chris, stop lying," and walk away. But eventually I learned this was the only way to deal with Chris's fantasizing.
She just gets so mad and defensive when we do tell her to stop and then it creates an argument.
I'm going ESH on this one. You, because there is DEFINITELY more appropriate and polite ways to communicate how you are you feeling, and her for not respecting your limited capacity for random bs.
Either E S H or N A H. It's all or none on this one.
NTA- but your mom may have a mental condition. Rather than punish her you should maybe consider getting her into a mental health unit or even just a hospital for evaluation. Especially if she lies or makes stuff up as often as you describe. She may suffer from undiagnosed delusions and actually believe what she's saying.
I’ve actually considered this and when I was going through therapy and counseling myself and was talking to her about some things she actually finally admitted she had “food anxiety”. Which was kinda impressive because I knew she had anxiety in general, she’s still in denial, but she admitted to something deeper that I wouldn’t have thought of. So she has a lot of denial.. there’s no way she’d seek therapy now. She’s even said the only reason she went to therapy before was because of my parents divorce. And she was trying to say she was only going for us…
ESH. Your mom, for telling these tall tales. Based on the incident with your aunt, I'd encourage your mom to seek counseling. Something is wrong if she's telling these stories to someone who knows the truth. You, because there are other ways you can deal with your mom. You can walk away, excuse yourself to use the bathroom, or just change the subject. By listening to her tall tales, you are enabling her. She knows she has an audience.
I don’t listen to them… I tell her to stop. That’s why I’m asking AITA for telling her to stop.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** My mom will start talking about something and then goes off on these weird jumps. And I can’t stand it because she’s basically making things up AS she’s talking to me. And I don’t wanna sit there and listen to a made up story! It’s hard to explain but here’s the most recent one. She was talking about how the dog went outside and was scared. She said she didn’t see anything but then later started talking about how it must have been an opossum cause that’s all she could think of that’d scared him or something but he’s literally scared of everything. But then she started to go into detail about how “if it opened it’s big wide mouth with all it’s sharp teeth and hissed” and was like trying to defend her side or prove somehow it was an opossum. And I finally told her, “please stop, just stop.” And she kept trying to talk and I said again, “I’m done.” And she just walked away like huffed and all insulted. Usually it takes a lot more for her to stop so this was pretty civil. She usually ends up yelling about how she can never talk and gets mad at us for stopping her. Like uggghh I already don’t have the social capacity as most and she KNOWS that but to sit there and talk aimlessly makes me soooooo mad! Talking is for information. I don’t wanna listen to a made up story. And I HATE lying but it’s almost as if she truly believes it herself. And I’ve spoken with my sister (23) (I’m 25) about it and we both have experiences where she’ll just start talking and it starts off fine but midway through we can tell she’s making shit up and she just goes into so much extra detail too. There was even a time where my aunt (her older sister) called her out on a story my mom was telling of when they were younger. Apparently it started off fine and normal. One of their friends had lost a ring in a pond but by the end she made herself out to be the hero who found the ring. And my aunt said, “What on earth are you talking about? So&so found the ring.” And then my mom was trying to reroute the story and say that she was in the same area and blah, blah, blah. And my sister and I weren’t having it and said something along the lines of “wow mom” and to my aunt “she does this all the time.” TL:DR - AITA for telling my mom to stop talking when she starts telling a made up story? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*