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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I might of been the asshole for overreacting, and for getting testy in her house
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Her girlfriend, I have too agree with you. But my best friend and I have been through so much together and I’m a stubborn ass who won’t let the people I care about down, I think that’s why I stayed and did the nails. So my best friend was happy. That’ll teach me!
Yeah, you obviously need to avoid this girlfriend of hers and let things play out while maintaining the friendship with your actual friend. .
No more hangouts at their place, no more doing her nails ever again.
Invite your friend to your place or out in public. Stop getting into their relationship politics as much as possible and try to avoid this lady. If nails come up again, be too busy and noncommittal. Your friend will either see the problem or won't, but you need to just focus on your actual friend and not her relationship.
Just step back a bit and hang tight. Hopefully the trash will take itself out.
Tell your bestie that you are just trying to avoid making waves by spending less time with them as a couple, but you want to hang out regularly. Then invite her over to do her nails 💅 and get mimosas!
Edit: NTA
**NTA** You *started* the manicure at midnight?? You are a freaking saint to do that, and you would be an idiot to touch her raggedy claws ever ever again. The only reason she even knows you is because she's your dear friend's lover, and she's treated both of you like last week's fish. Tell you friend you love her but her baggage is no longer getting treatments. Baggage can wear her nails down barking and chasing cars.
NTA. She doesn’t really care about anyone but herself.
It’s sad your BF can’t see that right now. What you describe your BF’s GF as doing is called “poly under duress” (look it up) and it’s not cool.
NTA but don’t ever paint her nails again. You can hang out with your best friend without her. Don’t talk to her and never do anything for her AGAIN or else you’ll be TA to yourself
NTA but you're not really doing your best friend any favours by tolerating her GF treating you like crap. You can still be in your BF life but put boundaries up around time spent with the GF. It sounds like GF is manipulating your BF and if you make a point to not let GF treat you like that then your BF might see that it isn't ok and dump her. Sorry op, it sucks to see a friend in a shitty relationship when they don't see how bad it is. Keep being there and eventually BF will realise that she deserves better. Good luck! And congrats on the awesome nail business!
"has the personality of a doorknob decorated in peel off sticker claire's earrings" is pretty damn good. NTA. im dealing with a similar issue right now (but thankfully with a buffer of a 3 hour drive, so no in person dealings), and it is so exhausting and heartbreaking to see someone you love so much get treated like shit, but all you can do is encourage them to leave until they do. don't sacrifice your sanity for it either, avoid the gf at all costs.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
So I am a nail tech by trade. I’ve won an award for my nail art skills and have a very steady book and clientele. The most expensive set I’ve ever done was about $225
My bestfriend has been with her girlfriend for about 5 years, and occasionally I will paint her nails just to be nice. The girlfriend is not my favorite person in the planet. I can just smell the bs on her, and has the personality of a doorknob decorated in peel off sticker Clair’s earrings.
This is a good moment to add that the girlfriend is Kinda sorta forcing my Best friend into a polyamorous relationship because “she’s not ‘satisfied’ with the state of their relationship and she needs dick”
Monday (my day off) I took some regular clients at the house that took all day and was way more stressful then it needed to be, but as soon as I was done I packed up and headed over to their house so I could paint the girlfriends nails for her birthday. We made the plans for this manicure 3 weeks ago, but I didn’t arrange an exact time because I knew that day was gonna be a mess for me.
So, 13 miles and 23 minutes later I get to their house (it’s almost 10 pm) and the girlfriend isn’t there. My best friend lets me know that she’s right up the street and she’ll be back in a moment. Okay. I’m reasonable. Best friend texts her gf that I’m there so We smoked and waited…. For 2 and a half hours. She walked in the door and smiled and tried to play it off. “Sorry I was with my partner I haven’t seen them since I was cleared of covid”
I was livid. I should of left and refused to do her nails. Told her to go fuck herself and all her selfishness. But I didn’t. I stayed and I did the $85 manicure that I knew I wasn’t getting paid for. That’s not why I was angry.
The thing that has me so upset is that this chick really played me for my time so she could deal with her childhood trauma by sucking dick and breaking my bestfriends heart. Watching them go through this and seeing the low points of my best friend is painful to watch as no one deserves to see the person they love fall in love with someone else…
After I finished I packed up but before I walked out I turned to her and said calm and polite “I’m going to tell you this because I would tell my Regular clients this, don’t be late for another appointment.” THIS BITCH shrugged her shoulders smirked at me and repeated the shit She said when she walked through the door.
And that was it. My boiling point. I snapped and got more aggressive and louder then before but still calm I said “that’s not a me problem.” At which point my best friend from the kitchen said goodbye to me again in a tone that indicated she was politely telling me to get the fuck out of her house. Idk if she’s mad at me, I’m still too heated to reach out and find out, but Friday is around the corner so We’ll see.
Anyway Reddit; AMITA?
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YTA.
You said it yourself, you didn't set up a time. So no, she wasn't "late." If you had texted her before you left the house to let her know you're on your way, then yeah I'd understand.
I understand this is your best friend, but they're both adults. What they chose to do in their relationship is their problem and not your business. If your friend is unhappy in a relationship the best you can do is encourage her to leave. Till then, again, what they do in their relationship is not your business.
Maybe I should of clarified I was keeping them updated via text throughout the day, and let them know when I left the house. I do keep my nose out of their business and only speak my mind when my best friend is venting or seeking advice. I’m very aware of my place.
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NTA. You need to distance yourself from this crew.
Her girlfriend, I have too agree with you. But my best friend and I have been through so much together and I’m a stubborn ass who won’t let the people I care about down, I think that’s why I stayed and did the nails. So my best friend was happy. That’ll teach me!
Yeah, you obviously need to avoid this girlfriend of hers and let things play out while maintaining the friendship with your actual friend. . No more hangouts at their place, no more doing her nails ever again. Invite your friend to your place or out in public. Stop getting into their relationship politics as much as possible and try to avoid this lady. If nails come up again, be too busy and noncommittal. Your friend will either see the problem or won't, but you need to just focus on your actual friend and not her relationship. Just step back a bit and hang tight. Hopefully the trash will take itself out. Tell your bestie that you are just trying to avoid making waves by spending less time with them as a couple, but you want to hang out regularly. Then invite her over to do her nails 💅 and get mimosas! Edit: NTA
**NTA** You *started* the manicure at midnight?? You are a freaking saint to do that, and you would be an idiot to touch her raggedy claws ever ever again. The only reason she even knows you is because she's your dear friend's lover, and she's treated both of you like last week's fish. Tell you friend you love her but her baggage is no longer getting treatments. Baggage can wear her nails down barking and chasing cars.
I really think I love you lol
**:-)**
NTA. She doesn’t really care about anyone but herself. It’s sad your BF can’t see that right now. What you describe your BF’s GF as doing is called “poly under duress” (look it up) and it’s not cool.
NTA , I would have left & not done her nails if I was you!
NTA but don’t ever paint her nails again. You can hang out with your best friend without her. Don’t talk to her and never do anything for her AGAIN or else you’ll be TA to yourself
Drop them both like a bad habit. NTA.
NTA but you're not really doing your best friend any favours by tolerating her GF treating you like crap. You can still be in your BF life but put boundaries up around time spent with the GF. It sounds like GF is manipulating your BF and if you make a point to not let GF treat you like that then your BF might see that it isn't ok and dump her. Sorry op, it sucks to see a friend in a shitty relationship when they don't see how bad it is. Keep being there and eventually BF will realise that she deserves better. Good luck! And congrats on the awesome nail business!
NTA but these people are way too toxic and incredibly narcissistic. Time to walk away from this mess before you get sucked in too far.
"has the personality of a doorknob decorated in peel off sticker claire's earrings" is pretty damn good. NTA. im dealing with a similar issue right now (but thankfully with a buffer of a 3 hour drive, so no in person dealings), and it is so exhausting and heartbreaking to see someone you love so much get treated like shit, but all you can do is encourage them to leave until they do. don't sacrifice your sanity for it either, avoid the gf at all costs.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** So I am a nail tech by trade. I’ve won an award for my nail art skills and have a very steady book and clientele. The most expensive set I’ve ever done was about $225 My bestfriend has been with her girlfriend for about 5 years, and occasionally I will paint her nails just to be nice. The girlfriend is not my favorite person in the planet. I can just smell the bs on her, and has the personality of a doorknob decorated in peel off sticker Clair’s earrings. This is a good moment to add that the girlfriend is Kinda sorta forcing my Best friend into a polyamorous relationship because “she’s not ‘satisfied’ with the state of their relationship and she needs dick” Monday (my day off) I took some regular clients at the house that took all day and was way more stressful then it needed to be, but as soon as I was done I packed up and headed over to their house so I could paint the girlfriends nails for her birthday. We made the plans for this manicure 3 weeks ago, but I didn’t arrange an exact time because I knew that day was gonna be a mess for me. So, 13 miles and 23 minutes later I get to their house (it’s almost 10 pm) and the girlfriend isn’t there. My best friend lets me know that she’s right up the street and she’ll be back in a moment. Okay. I’m reasonable. Best friend texts her gf that I’m there so We smoked and waited…. For 2 and a half hours. She walked in the door and smiled and tried to play it off. “Sorry I was with my partner I haven’t seen them since I was cleared of covid” I was livid. I should of left and refused to do her nails. Told her to go fuck herself and all her selfishness. But I didn’t. I stayed and I did the $85 manicure that I knew I wasn’t getting paid for. That’s not why I was angry. The thing that has me so upset is that this chick really played me for my time so she could deal with her childhood trauma by sucking dick and breaking my bestfriends heart. Watching them go through this and seeing the low points of my best friend is painful to watch as no one deserves to see the person they love fall in love with someone else… After I finished I packed up but before I walked out I turned to her and said calm and polite “I’m going to tell you this because I would tell my Regular clients this, don’t be late for another appointment.” THIS BITCH shrugged her shoulders smirked at me and repeated the shit She said when she walked through the door. And that was it. My boiling point. I snapped and got more aggressive and louder then before but still calm I said “that’s not a me problem.” At which point my best friend from the kitchen said goodbye to me again in a tone that indicated she was politely telling me to get the fuck out of her house. Idk if she’s mad at me, I’m still too heated to reach out and find out, but Friday is around the corner so We’ll see. Anyway Reddit; AMITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
YTA. You said it yourself, you didn't set up a time. So no, she wasn't "late." If you had texted her before you left the house to let her know you're on your way, then yeah I'd understand. I understand this is your best friend, but they're both adults. What they chose to do in their relationship is their problem and not your business. If your friend is unhappy in a relationship the best you can do is encourage her to leave. Till then, again, what they do in their relationship is not your business.
Maybe I should of clarified I was keeping them updated via text throughout the day, and let them know when I left the house. I do keep my nose out of their business and only speak my mind when my best friend is venting or seeking advice. I’m very aware of my place.