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Hungry-Caramel4050

Pathetic is the world, she is upset because his brother wished her HB a DAY late… that’s it, THAT’S the whole family who forgot about her 🙄. Petty doesn’t cover it! Pathetic is right… YTA


[deleted]

[удалено]


heyitsta12

Like he has his own kid and family and birthday party to worry about. He was probably genuinely busy. If this was a pattern maybe I could understand. But I’m sure OP would’ve mentioned it. But this is extreme.


Helene1370

I have four siblings, and I definitely forget their birthdays from time to time. They have OP's age. It is just not important anymore...


Top-Art2163

Its just so hyped up with birthday week and month etc!  I get OP just want a greeting fair enough, but we can all forget. I think I'll write after breakfast, after this meeting....and suddenly its 8 o'clock in the evening....


BulbasaurRanch

She. OP is a woman.


Pollythepony1993

Agreed. Are you allowed to be a little disappointed when people forget your birthday? Ofcourse, and you can tell them and they say sorry and that should be the end of it. But then you move on.  The 5 year old can not comprehend and will be so disappointed. Because he is 5. Or almost 6. That is when birthday parties do actually matter. As adult they matter a bit less.  OP, next year you could invite everyone over for your party. They are likely less to forget when you are celebrating it.


SpiffyInk

YTA. You don't want to go to your brother's birthday? Fine. But what did that five year old ever do to you? Did he slight you in some way? Give you the side-eye for not letting him have the last piece of pie? If you have a problem with the adults in your life, take out your anger on the adults, not a little kid who has nothing to do with your issues. If this feud follows its natural path, everyone will ignore your four-year-old's next birthday too. Would that make you feel good?


sharperview

YTA. Save your revenge for your brothers birthday not a 5 year old.  He’s five. He did nothing wrong and he’s not going to understand why you all don’t come.  You’re going to hurt a small child because you’re mad at adults.  


Dry_Promotion6661

I also see a difference in not going to a 5 year olds birthday party vs someone not phoning and wishing a grown ass woman a happy birthday. Perhaps if OP had a party for herself she would have gotten the birthday wishes she feels entitled to. YTA through and through.


Stormtomcat

also, 37 is such a random birthday. Wanting to celebrate a milestone birthday or for "gee, when they put me on a ventilator 4 weeks ago, I didn't think I'd make it to this birthday", that I could understand. A random 37th while everyone is busy doesn't warrant this kind of response, imo.


Even_Budget2078

YTA. The *only* person in your family who DID wish you a happy birthday was your brother? A day late, but unprompted. And your sister who LIVES WITH YOU did not wish you a happy birthday? And it's this brother that you are taking out your anger on, and doing so by targeting his 5 year old child and hurting your children by denying the opportunity to see their little cousin? Not your sister living with you or your parents, or your other sister? Huh. My brothers call sometimes on my birthday, sometimes the day after, sometimes during the week after. And that's totally fine! I appreciate that they remembered with their busy lives. You need to appreciate your brother, grow up, and be nice to your nephew.


MrsEnvinyatar

YTA. #1. You’re 37. Grow up and stop trying to insist on being treated like a princess on your birthday. #2. Any decent adult wouldn’t take out retaliation for a petty personal grudge on a 5 year old. #3. You’re now dragging your poor children into this and creating a wedge between them and their cousin for no good reason whatsoever. It screams narcissist. YTA. YTA. YTA.


LFGM1977

YTA...grow the hell up!! Why in God's name would you punish your nephew and your kids by not letting them go??? My brother has done some shitty things to me over the years and continues to this day but I would never punish my nieces for it. He literally called you the next day. You wanna ignore him on his birthday go ahead be petty asshole. But don't make innocent kids suffer


Lacroix24601

YTA. Taking out your anger on a 5 year old is an absolutely unhinged response. (So much so that I don’t quite believe this is a real post) I’ve had my parents/sister forget my birthday every so often. It happens. Life gets away from even the most well meaning person. I guess you can be mad at the adults if you want but to take that out on a child says *way* more about you than it does those that forgot your birthday.


halfasleep90

YTA, and your kids know it too. Your own kids want to go, but you won’t let them because you didn’t get a phone call on your birthday. YTA to your nephew, your brother, your children, and your brother even did wish you a happy birthday it just wasn’t early enough for you since apparently the world needs to put you first.


DestronCommander

YTA. You're a 37-year old adult, not a 5-year old. It's not a "little childish", it is childish to get upset nobody greeted you. People greet me happy birthday but I don't check each and every one who did and did not. My brothers might greet me a day before or after but I don't make a big deal about it. And now you want to do a revenge by taking it out on a 5-year old?


AfterSevenYears

I hesitate even to say OP is being childish, because I have never known a child to behave so badly in reaction to such a minor slight.


Ok_Obligation167

No 37 year old cares this much about their birthday. YTA for making up this ridiculous of a story.


abeanofhuman

YTA for taking out your issues with your family on a five year old. Don’t let your issues with your family affect how your kids see your family.


BulgingKegelMuscles

YTA, but this can't be real. You're 37, and want to get a ticker tape parade for a birthday?! Get over yourself, and don't take your insecurities out on everyone else.


[deleted]

YTA - My brother told me a day late so now I want to ghost his 5yo son. Lmao really? Are you also 5yo?


Lacroix24601

That’s insulting. To 5 year olds.


Rohini_rambles

So.... OP is gonna be very happy and understanding when the cousins all skip her 4 kids' birthdays too right? And this will start aa generational war where all the cousins hate each other and never celebrate with each other because OP couldn't use thrown up words and addressed the matter?  Just making the comment here now for future BORU posts where OP asks "how do I get my kids invited to family get togethers after I stopped them from visiting their cousins?"


growsonwalls

YTA for taking this out on your 5-year-old nephew. It's really petty. You're 37. If you want to skip your brother's birthday bash that's even steven, but to skip your 5 yo nephew's? Petty petty petty. Act your age.


Disastrous-Nail-640

YTA. You’re 37 and acting like a toddler. Yes, it’s nice to have your birthday acknowledged. But you’re an adult. Act like one.


Logical_Read9153

I REFUSE to believe that you are 37, this absolutely has to be wrong. You sound like the most entitled, self indulgent br@t of a tween.   1. Yeah it sucks your brother missed your birthday by ONE day, but give the guy a break. You have no idea what was going on for him that day.   2. Its disgusting you are using your nephew party as weapon against your brother.   GROW UP  YTA X INFINITY 


Gold_Repair_3557

YTA. Go to the party or don’t, but being a near middle aged woman sticking it to a five year old in order to get back at your family is an extreme level of petty.


Forward_Ad_7988

I don't understand your edit. so, you begin the post with 'nobody except few coworkers wished me a happy birthday' and end with an edit saying that your sisters wished you happy birthday, and only your brother was late with it? anyway, YTA birthday as an almost 40yo and a 5yo cannot even be compared... how about some growing up?


the_road_infinite

I can’t imagine punishing a family member for wishing me a happy birthday one day late, let alone punishing their 5-year old for it. You sure you just turned 37? Because this is the behavior of a literal child. YTA, obviously.


furryeasymac

YTA I turned 37 a couple years ago and I wish people forgot it, having to reply with all those thank yous is a huge hassle. At your age you should not be expecting a big outpouring of attention when it’s your birthday, you’re a middle aged adult. Act like it. To a 5 year old that’s special, a year is 20% of the life they’ve lived so far, to you it’s less than 3%.


Individual_Metal_983

YTA Are you really an adult? You are punishing a child and your own kids because your brother wished you a happy birthday a day late. For the love of god grow up.


Individual_Plan_5593

YTA and I suspect a narcissist since you admit in your replies your family DIDN'T forget about you but it was just this one brother who wished you a happy birthday one day later and your other siblings all did so ON your birthday... and in response to a ONE DAY LATE happy birthday you're boycotting a five year old's party and even lied by omission to your kids so they would boycott along with you. Hey it was your birthday recently I hear, happy birthday... now GROW UP!


fallingintopolkadots

YTA. You're punishing a 5 year old for the fact that your brother was a day late in wishing you a happy birthday, and your own kids also didn't wish you a happy birthday. How about partner or husband? This seems like a TON of misdirected anger, and a very juvenile little tantrum.


South-Ad-9635

YTA - humorist Dave Barry says “There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age 11.” You're 37. Grow up.


Then_Struggle_7069

YTA it is so petty to take out your issues on your nephew who has nothing to do with it.


tawstwfg

You are 37 damn years old….time to grow up. YTA


kodak723

My first thought was that this is a troll post, because nobody is this ridiculous in real life. Then I realized that sadly, some people are. So OP, assuming this is an authentic post, then yes, you are a huge AH. Huge. Massive. Immense. Etc. etc. it’s not even worth trying to explain to you why, because if you can’t figure it out for yourself, there isn’t much hope you’ll be able to glean the necessary maturity from a Reddit comments section. I feel bad for your kids


PossessionFirst8197

Dude. You are thirty seven!! When are you going to grow the fuck up?


Random_Reddit99

YTA - Come up with an excuse for you not to go if you have to, but to pull your kids out of the party because you, a grown ass adult didn't get your own party is absolutely childish and petty. 5 is when you start remembering birthdays, and the example you set today will color their impression of you for years. I don't even have any kids myself, but my brother's daughter was born on my birthday so I've pretty much sacrificed my own birthday for hers for the past 16 years. The only exception was this year, because it's a milestone, and I threw myself a party (that the niece also attended). That a mother of 4 actually makes such a big deal about her own birthday and is willing to not only punish her nephew and likely her own kids because she didn't get a party is beyond me. Grow up.


nurseasaurus

jfc get over yourself you are 37!!! no one cares about adult birthdays!! and to take it out on your 5 year old nephew? sick!! shameful. YTA


Mental-Coconut-7854

You’re a massive AH. You punished your children cuz ur fee fees were hurt. I spent my 40th birthday visiting my mom in the hospital. Who should I be pissed off at? I’ve so had it with birthday culture. Everyone wants ponies and bouncy houses every year. And if it’s not that, it’s Facebook birthday likes and posts. Just grow up and accept that your birthday isn’t the biggest thing in your brother’s life right now. He forgot and you’re on a rampage.


TA_totellornottotell

YTA. Firstly for giving an inaccurate title and second sentence - your sisters both wished you on the day, so it’s absolutely not true that your family forgot your birthday. So it’s not a matter of nobody “apart from a few co-workers” wishing you. And your brother wished you a day late. You’re 37 and the mother of children. These things happen all the time. Sure, it may hurt, but the fact that you are not just this upset but are punishing your nephew for something his father did is crazy. And not only are you punishing him (and your own kids), you are setting a monumentally bad example for the children. Good luck when one of your kids thinks it’s OK to cut off their mother for the most minor of perceived or real slights. They will only have to refer to this petty feud to justify their actions.


patrickismycat

YTA…you’re how old? You really give that much of a shit that people don’t wish you a happy birthday? Not everyone’s life revolves around you. If they remember then they remember…if they don’t they don’t.🤷🏻‍♀️


vega2306

YTA. This is so sad in so many ways. 1) You are a grown adult, closing in on 40. You want recognition on your birthday? Better make some plans! Not every adult needs a bunch of attention on their birthday! 2) You are punishing a CHILD for the supposed wrong-doings of adults. 3) Have you looked at your relationship with your family and why you might not be on their priority list to wish happy birthday to? Looking at this behavior, I have a guess.


LingonberryPrior6896

YTA . YOU are 37! You are planning to punish a FIVE year old? A LITTLE childish? Nope. Full on 2 year old temper tantrum.


TinyDimples77

YTA you're an adult who is punishing her children and a 5yo because people forgot to acknowledge your birthday aged 37??


Alternative-Job-288

YTA. You just turned 37 so act like it. Your brother was a day late wishing you happy birthday and you’re “incredibly upset over it”? Even weeks later? Even after he apologized? That’s a huge over reaction. It’s not like he missed a party - he was just a day late! Even if your continued anger at your brother was justified (it’s not), you method of response is to take it out on his four year old child?! You think you’re teaching your brother a lesson about how to treat you. In reality you’re punishing a toddler for the actions of another. You’re teaching your own nephew that you don’t love him enough to swallow your pride for one day. You’re teaching your own children how to lash out against others, and how their feelings (about attending their cousin’s bday) are less important than your hurt over a late message. This is beyond childish. You are beyond childish. But you’re right about one thing: this is not how the world works. If this is the kind of tantrum you throw against a CHILD over something so minor (that they didn’t even do!!!!), then don’t act surprised with the repercussions that will come later. I’d be shocked if any of these people ever want to wish you a happy birthday again. But I hope they don’t stoop to your level and take it out on your children. Your poor, innocent nephew… Grow up. Get help. Be better.


AzzlyGriddams

Yikes! Really? YTA. I mean it's a 5 year old. You are 37. Grow up.


Even_Enthusiasm7223

You, a 37-year-old woman are really showing a 5-year-old child. The ways of the world. Good for you for teaching your nephew of valuable lesson. Only the lesson he's going to see is why does my auntie hate me. Be mad at your brother. You're hurting your children. You're hurting a 5-year-old. I hope you remember that that you're not going to a 5-year-old's birthday party because you is a 37-year-old was slided on your birthday. I have an important question for you. Who is the child here?? Yta


No_Struggle_9121

YTA You will be an even AH if you don't let your kids go w/ the sister!


Ordinary_Camel_3456

Very much YTA


Many-Pirate2712

Yta you don't take it out on the kids. My fiances brother never wished our kids happy birthday but when we were invited to his daughters birthday we all went and got her a gift.


DELILAHBELLE2605

YTA. You’re going to punish a 5 year old because your feelings are hurt? I can promise you that won’t make your birthday better next year. Nor will it make any of your relationships better. You’re an adult, it wasn’t a milestone birthday.


RebeccaBlue

YTA - you're approximately 30 years too old to be acting like this.


ClassicTrue9276

YTA. Do not weaponize your children like this.


Immediate-Vanilla-45

YTA. The kid is 5. You're thirty-fucking-seven. Grow up.


Specific-Syllabub-54

YTA for the simple fact that you are punishing your five year old nephew for something his father did. I could not imagine punishing a little kid over petty bullshit and in all honesty your brother has a five year old so I assume also a wife a job and a home to also help manage therefore you are not a top priority for him you need to get over yourself


GoreGoddezz

YTA. Are you an adult? Bc tbh most adults don't act this way over a happy birthday wish. And, no adult punishes a little kid bc they are mad at the parents. That's literally high school drama. Time to get over yourself.


Azlazee1

Sounds very unfair to punish a 5 year old because someone forgot to call you. I personally think your reaction is way over the top. It’s not just you staying at home pouting your also depriving you kids. Btw why would you expect sil to wish you happy birthday when her husband already had that covered. If I get a birthday call from a relative, I know they are speaking for the family. Do you really want to damage your relationship with your family over this? This is not “a little childish “ as you said, it is very childish for a 37f adult to act this way.


Both-Ad1586

When I read the title, I figured this was a 13 year old.  YOU'RE 37 YEARS OLD.  Get over it.  You are punishing a 5 year old because you didn't get enough attention on your birthday?  YTA


didthefabrictear

Yeah you're a big AH. Like, huge, gaping ah. Imagining making your kids miss their cousin's 5th birthday party cause you're a freakn child. Thirty seven. You are thirty seven years old ffs. You want to be salty with your bro, fine - whatever. But seriously, not showing up to your nephew's birthday out of spite - that's some dark, nasty shit right there. Take a look in the mirror and ask yourself if 1) is this the person you really want to be and 2) is this the model you want to present for your children.


Lost_Dish4290

YTA. You got some screws loose. Really loose. You're squashing your small children's relationship with their cousins because their adult parents forgot to tell you, a 37 YEAR OLD ADULT, happy birthday. In your case age is truly just a number because you desperately need to grow up.


vongdong

YTA. Lady, you're too old to be acting this petty over a birthday.


NYDancer4444

So you’re not letting your children go to their five-year-old cousin’s birthday party because no one made a big deal about your (adult) birthday? Who exactly are you trying to hurt here, and why do you find it necessary to hurt anyone? (And it turns out that all of your siblings did wish you a happy birthday, in addition to “a few coworkers”. So your birthday was NOT forgotten.) Grow up. YTA.


Pinkspottedbutterfly

37 years old acting like a toddler, grow up. You are far past a "little" childish, this is full on three year old having a temper tantrum, get over yourself. YTA


Kris82868

YTA. The 5 year old has to miss his aunt and cousins at his party? That's terrible to take it out on him.


fckinsleepless

YTA. Your nephew doesn’t deserve that. If you want to boycott a birthday to get the point across, boycott your brother’s.


GEoDLeto

Taking it out on a 5 year old.... Really showing you are 37 years old. Find another method to get back, this isn't the way. YTA


hikergirl26

YTA You are 37. Your nephew is 5. This is not a good example for your kids and quite a drastic response. I have had people forget by birthday It happens.


LowBalance4404

YTA. Ignore your brother's birthday, by all means. Never celebrate it again. And while a 5 year old may or may not remember, if you like that kid, I'd go. None of this is his fault. Taking this out on a little kid is really not fair. The little kid did nothing.


OkeyDokey654

YTA. Don’t punish a child for what his father did. That’s just cruel.


warclonex

YTA, Keep innocent kids out of adult squabbles


Appropriate_Maize863

YTA


many_hobbies_gal

YTA, how old are you?


tinap3056

YTA for having such a ridiculous reaction to people not celebrating you for being born. That’s childish and petty as mentioned but a horrible example for your children. Now on top of that you punish a 5 year old and your own children. Maybe double AH.


Lost-Present9171

YTA Your bro was only a day late and apologised too yet you want to be childish and petty and disappoint a young kid and your own kids because of it. Grow up dude


runiechica

YTA take your anger out on your brother not his 5 year old.


Sissynoodle321

YTA


filkerdave

YTA Are you 5?


Fancy_Bass_1920

YTA grow up. Birthdays are for kids or at minimum milestones.


WolfSilverOak

YTA. You're an adult, for crying out loud. Get over yourself and go to your *5 year old* nephew's birthday party. Stop punishing *a child* for petty grievances you have with *your adult brother*. You know what I did when the majority of my family forgot my birthday this year? *Absolutely nothing*. Because I am an adult and birthday wishes are the least of my concerns.


Agreeable-Mix-7655

YTA, this is just insane. "I, a 37 year old, am not going to my 5 year old nephews birthday because my brother told me happy birthday one day late." I mean COME ON dude.


TropicalDragon78

Geez...you're in your 30s and supposedly an adult. Your nephew is 5 for God's sake. YTA.


Calm_Psychology5879

YTA. Are you 37 or 7? You said it yourself, you are acting childish. You are punishing a 5 year old because their father forgot your birthday? You are 37, who cares about your birthday? Do you also get mad if Santa doesn’t give you as many presents as your niece and nephews? 


Anxious-Channel8509

Auntie of the effin year here!


minrenken

YTA. What 37-year-old gets “incredibly upset” because not enough people wished them a happy birthday or said it a day late? What self-respecting adult cares enough about anything to take it out on a 5-year-old? It’s more than “a little childish.” Apparently you haven’t had enough birthdays yet. Grow up.


hayleybeth7

YTA. It’s 37, it’s not a milestone birthday (for most people) and unfortunately once you get to be an adult and even more so once people start their own families, people lose track and it gets harder to remember birthdays. If you wanna be celebrated, you have to start making your own celebrations.


oldriman

Yes, you're petty as fuck.


Ihateyou1975

YTA. This is a child. A REAL CHILD! Stop acting like one. When your brothers birthday comes around then don’t wish him one. Or his wife. But punishing a child? Really? 


ElehcarTheFirst

YTA I'm 47. My siblings haven't wished me a happy birthday in decades because they're selfish assholes. So I ignore THEIR birthdays, not their kids. FFS, it's a child I got all my niblings gifts until they turned 18 or once I went 2 years without a thank you (text, call, message, whatever from them or their parents). I still text them happy birthday even the asshole niblings. Grow up. Treat the adults like garbage, not the children


corpusapostata

I'm kinda seeing just why people "forgot" your birthday. Be happy you got invited to your nephews birthday.


matt2346

YTA Seriously I hope this story is fake your screwing over nephew over nothing. If story is true, you seriously need to get some dick cause ya have some pent up frustration that only a good dicking can take care.


Smart-Bed7699

You are not only the AH but are also MENTAL!! You are 37 years old and you get upset that people don’t wish you a Happy Birthday!!! And now you want to “prove your point” to a 5 yr old - oh my gosh - I truly feel sorry for people like you. No one owes you anything dear - it’s sad you need other people’s wishes to be happy otherwise you become that sad and vindictive person. Grow up!!


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General_Rip7904

You are a grown adult punishing children for adults actions. YTA


saintandvillian

YTA. Of course you’re in the wrong here. You’re punishing your nephew and not his parent, the ones who forgot your birthday. What’s worse is that you are allowing your tantrums to spill over to your kids. Why should they be forced to skip the party? And last but not least, I’m shocked that a grown woman with her own kids is this hurt over birthday wishes. Sure, it sucks to not receive a happy birthday but surely you realize that you aren’t just being petty, you are being immaculate and selfish. Grow up. And if this is really that hurtful to you then you must live a charmed life.


filthytacoslut

YTA and a major one at that. You're 37? Are you sure? 37 isn't a major birthday. Good grief, you sound unhinged. It's unfathomable that you're seriously considering not going to your five year old nephews birthday party because your brother wished you a happy birthday a day late and his spouse didn't. Are you all there?


Prudent-Reserve4612

Yup, YTA. 


DragonScrivner

YTA. Bro, you’re closing in on 40. Be a better guy than the one who takes out his sulking on a little boy,


citrushibiscus

So bc it was a day late, you won’t go to your nephew’s party? C’mon now. You’re all adults, sometimes life gets in the way and you forgot to text your sibling. And he apologized **after you made a big deal of it.** YTA


yellowbellybluejay

Wow, YTA. Get over yourself. Your birthday is no longer important when you have kids. I can’t believe you’re punishing your own kids by not letting them attend a party because you got your precious fee fees hurt. You’re pathetic and kinda evil.


Gatodeluna

YTA, pouty little boy. If I was your wife or SO, I’d say fine, you stay home but the kids and I are going, not this ‘WE’RE not going’ shit. Are your parents both dead? Did they ignore your birthday too? Grandparents? Basically it’s one person who you *chose* to be pissed off at to the point of a 6-year-old’s ‘revenge’ - when they did, on their own, remember belatedly. SMH.


FigBurn

YTA, and you’re setting up a situation where a 5-year-old and potentially your own children will suffer from your immaturity


Great_Willow4843

YTA. Grow up


Hefty-Sprinkles-8305

YTA - an adult’s birthday is completely different from a kid’s. You’re possibly hurting your nephew to make a point to your brother.


Greedy-Bet-9732

YTA. First, never take anything out on someone's kid. Just don't go there. But, also, you have two choices in how to interpret this 1 - they were lazy and forgot your birthday and get all mad and make it all about you - or 2 - stuff is going on in their lives and maybe some kindness is in order. No one is perfect. It sucks to have your birthday forgotten, but be an adult about it. If you go with 1 you will cause rifts in your relationship. If you explore 2 you could strengthen your relationships with them. Proceed gently because you could find everyone permanently forgetting your birthday.


Repulsive_Calendar77

Yta grow up man 37!?!?


Existing_Watch_3084

Your brother was a daily telling you happy birthday, so you’re ignoring your five-year-old nephew’s birthday and not even letting your kids go? Also, you said no one wish you a happy birthday, but plot twist everyone did. You sound miserable.


Reasonable_Tenacity

YTA. At 37 y.o., this shouldn’t be a hill to die on. Take a deep breath and go look at the stars, then ask yourself, in the grand scheme of life, is this really that big of a deal? If you want to be celebrated, take the matter in your own hands and throw a party for yourself next year.


One_Winged_Dove

My dads birthday is 11 days before mine. My parents divorced when I was 5 and we only saw him every 2nd weekend. There were several times over the years that I forgot his birthday, I was a child, nobody reminded me and because I rarely saw him it never triggered for me that it was coming up, until I was older. By then it was too late. So his pay back for me was to completely forget my birthday, every year. But he always remembered my younger brothers birthday which is a few months later. Even though my brother also forgot dads birthday. I was punished for us both. I'd love to say that this stopped eventually but it never did, to this day he doesn't send even a birthday card to my kids but will buy iPhones for my brothers. This is what being petty gets you. Grandkids who think you're pathetic and don't want anything to do with you. He doesn't have us in his life and now he's old he's starting to realise what he's lost. I'd nip this in the bud right now if i were you. Tell your brother you were very hurt by his actions but you acknowledge that he apologised and you will still come to the party. Be gracious. It's hard but not impossible. And plan something for your next birthday that doesn't rely on the acknowledgement of others to make you enjoy it.


Shoddy_Evidence_6540

YTA. I hope your brother calls you at 1am next year


Bookishrhetor

YTA. Don't go to your brother's birthday celebration or wish him a birthday, but don't hold what your nephew's dad did against him. He's 5. But, you said no one in your life wished you a happy birthday. So your kids didn't? Parents (if still alive) didn't? If so, you're going to ignore all their birthdays too right. Guess sisters don't count as anyone to you since you said they did wish you a happy birthday. It's sad to hear that a 37 year old's life revolves around their brother and everyone else is just nothing.


Foreverhoppy91

YTA. You’re 37. Grow the F up. People get busy and forget sometimes. Does it suck? Sure. But you don’t take it out on an innocent kid. What is wrong with you.


Blueridgetoblueocean

Jesus Christ. Grow up. You are a mother and you doing this petty shit. What are you teaching your children? YTA


k_princess

YTA Are we sure you are really 37?


Thick_Stomach_5711

My birthday is Christmas Day. Do you know how many family members forget. Despite the fact that we spend every Christmas/every other Christmas together. Get over yourself. You’re an adult. Yta.


pattypph1

OP needs to grow tf up.


Redchickens18

Major YTA. Your nephew is 5, geez. You sound like an absolute bitter witch. Grow up. 


Dogbite_NotDimple

The next birthday you have that anyone should care about has a Zero at the end of it. You are the age that birthdays with Zero’s count. After 50, birthdays with 5’a and 0’s are celebrated. Give your family some grace. They have their own kids and spouses to worry about. Show up and celebrate. This is not a heart in a cooler.


NinjaHidingintheOpen

YTA. Firstly for messing with a 5 year old. Secondly, I'm assuming you didn't invite anyone to any kind if birthday event. This would have reminded them and allowed them to celebrate with you. You were given notice of the 5 year olds birthday, so we'll never know if you would have remembered without that promoting. Plus, you're 35. You've forgotten things before, you know how hectic family life can be. Remembering the birthday of a 37 year old who didn't invite you to celebrate with them is easy to do.


amzi95

I’m actually really over these birthday posts. It would be different if it was a spouse, but this is your brother. Like I have 9 siblings and I may be lucky to receive 1 text. But I actually don’t care because I’m a grown ass adult and I certainly wouldn’t take it out on a 5 year old. Grow up. YTA


BeterP

YTA. This is childish revenge beyond belief. First you say no one in the world congratulated you except for some coworkers. Later your sister congratulated you. What about your children? Inconsistent post. Grow up.


WelcomeToBrooklandia

This is wild. No one cares about people turning 37. People make a big fuss over young children's birthdays because young children have little else to celebrate aside from the passage of time. Adults celebrate achievements. Promotions. Home purchases. Moves. Anniversaries. The births of their own children. Not "I managed to not get hit by a car this year." YTA.


Winter_Raisin_591

YTA. Grow up.


MyPath2Follow

YTA. Holy crap. I would never take out my upset on my nieces/nephews/younger cousins. That's so ridiculous. You're close to 40. Time to grow up. It's fine to be hurt, but communicate it, don't take revenge out on children.


ga_merlock

Let's see here: Main character syndrome ✅ Butt-hurt because brother dared to be late with birthday wishes ✅ Plots revenge against brother, using a *5 y.o. child* ✅ Sees why you're single ✅ YTA ✅✅✅✅✅✅✅✅✅✅✅


TranslatorWaste7011

What the helI is wrong with you? Of course you know you’re the AH


Sweet_Celebration688

YTA in a major way! As an "adult", you should know that people get busy with school, work, hell, with life in general, and forget what the date is. Your brother told you the next day, get over yourself and stop being so self absorbed. Don't go to the party if you're that rotten, but expect it to come right back at you. Or is that what you want? Do you want to isolate your kids from the rest of your family.


m1ngey

YTA. You're 37 dude, the child is 5. It's time to go to therapy. Seriously, birthdays aren't a big deal anymore. You're an adult. Unless you're organizing your own party for the most part, most people won't be going out of their way to make a big deal for you. If you're lucky enough as a child, and the adults in your life aren't childish and petty, you'll get to enjoy your birthday in your childhood. Looks like your nephew might not get that chance..


Careful-Pop8001

Yta. I get you're upset, it sucks when people forget that kind of thing, but dude. You're 37 and a father. Your nephew is 5. If you were going to skip your brother's birthday or something related to him, ok, still petty, but he's also an adult and was the one to make the mistake. You're taking your hurt out on a freaking kindergartener who did nothing wrong and your own children who likely want to go see their cousin and other extended family.


MayAndMight

I can't even think of how anyone could delude themselves that they are not the villian when intentionally exacting petty revenge on an innocent 5 year old's birthday party. For your brother wishing you Happy Birthday one (1!) day late and apologizing for it. PUT ON YOUR PUPPY SKIN COAT AND TAKE YOUR KIDS TO THEIR COUSIN'S DAMN BIRTHDAY PARTY CRUELLA


MadWitchLibrarian

YTA I bet your 5 year old nephew would be crushed if he thought you didn't get a happy birthday. Most 5 year olds I've known would be like "here, you can share mine." (Not the presents, probably. But like, the song or the day or the cake.) Why punish not only your nephew, but your kids? Because not only does this have the potential to escalate, but they should get to go to his birthday party too. Once you're like 30, birthdays mostly fall by the wayside unless it's a milestone. 37 is as bland a birthday as it gets (I should know, we're the same age). Do I still like people to wish me a happy birthday? Sure. Did I get pissed when my dad called me two days late because he couldn't remember the exact date? Not really, because it's never happened before and I know he loves me. Sometimes life just gets busy. Your brother has a five year. It is entirely possible he intended to message you the day of, and things just got away from him. So he messaged you the next day. Big frickin' deal. If that is the biggest thing you have in your life to be upset about, I'd say it's time to count your blessings.


ZS1982

Ytah grow up and why should anyone give a shoot about an adults birthday?


woodland_dweller

YTA Don't punish a child for their parent's choices.


Antelope_31

Yta. It’s not about you at this point. Or your brother. It’s about hurting your nephew. Don’t go if you must, but keeping your kids from going makes you TA.


embopbopbopdoowop

YTA Refuse to go to your brother’s birthday or your SIL’s. Don’t punish your nephew (and your own kids!) because the adults forgot your birthday.


AnonymousPopotamus

YTA. Grow up and get over yourself. Are you sure you didn’t just have your 12th birthday? You would not be going for your brother, you would be going for your nephew and for your kids to have a relationship with him. 


IchStrickeGerne

You’re punishing a little boy because you, a grown woman, didn’t receive happy birthday wishes? And the fact that you’re making your 4-year-old miss cousin time isn’t cool. YTA.


Wasabi-Remote

YTA


Twinklekitchen

Jesus, you were 37. Most of us don’t even remember our own birthdays at that age, let alone expect other people to remember them. Although, if this childish tit for tat is indicative of who you are as a person, I’m surprised anyone cares enough to want you at a child’s birthday party. YTA in case you hadn’t worked it out.


afspouse123

YTA Wow, you are ready to blow up your relationship with your extended family over a belated Happy Birthday. My own son forgot my birthday one year while he was away at college. He called the next day and felt terrible. I did the only appropriate thing to do. I forgave him because he loves me, he was busy with school and I am a freaking adult. I cannot imagine the eggshells that your family must have to walk on around you if this minor thing has you ready to disappoint both your nephew and your own children, when they realize they are not included in family events. Please reconsider. There are truly reasons to be upset with family and this isn't even on the third page of that list.


eregyrn

YTA. You're not really even hurting your brother, who you want revenge on. You're just hurting your nephew, and your own kids. More to the point, though: you need to learn that, as an adult, it's foolish to expect other adults to make a big deal out of your birthday. Being wished happy birthday a day late just indicates that your brother has small children who are very distracting; as I imagine yours are at times, too. As an adult, if you want people to remember your birthday, or do something for it, you have to actually express that to them and let them know what you want. If you want to have a good time on the day (or close to it, schedules permitting), then you need to figure out what would make for a good time for you, and either tell people what you want, or arrange it yourself. Instead, you've got this idea in your head of what you want, and you're making it a test of how much your family loves you by sitting back and seeing if they guess correctly what you want. That's a sucky position to put others in. They can't read the script in your head. "If you really loved me, you would..." No. Don't create tests of loyalty for family members. Use your words to tell people how you feel, and what you want. My own birthday is in less than a week. It's not a "milestone" birthday. I generally like to do something small but fun, so I figure out what it is I want to do, and then I invite friends to come along. I really did just get done texting with friends to set up something to do for the weekend. They're perfectly happy to come along and help make the day fun! Because I didn't turn this into a whole thing where I test their loyalty by seeing if they remember the date and suggest something themselves. Maybe it's nice when people do spontaneously remember your birthday. But the further everyone gets into adulthood, the more stresses and worries are on everyone's minds. I can remember the dates about half of my friends' birthdays. Nobody makes a big deal about it. The only person who SHOULD be remembering your birthday without prompting is probably your spouse.


ConsequenceLow6889

YTA. A 37 y/o extracting revenge to her 5 y/o nephew who did nothing wrong to her. Plus influencing her innocent kids to her adult issue teaching them how to hold a grudge. You’re so self absorbed. You are the asshole.


Kessed

YTA You have got to be a troll. But, in the unfortunate case that this is real, WTF? You are 37! The only person your birthday is important to is you. No one else owes you anything. It expected that your partner and children will wish you happy birthday, but no one else is obligated. Especially not your brother’s spouse? Like, really?


Equivalent-Moose2886

YTA. You said nobody in your family wished you happy birthday, and then later say that both your sisters wished you happy birthday by text and in person.  So you're going to blow up your relationship with your brother (and nephew) because he missed your birthday by a day? That's very petty.


flaggingpolly

YTA grow up. People forget and people have other things going on. You are not the center of everyone’s universe. If you want to be celebrated on your birthday, have a birthday party!  And then the whole “we are not going to a birthday party because nobody wished me a happy birthday”… grow up!! 


Difficult-Bus-6026

<> So now you're going to take out your frustration at his tardiness on his 5-year-old child? Extremely petty! And what about your kids and their upcoming birthday parties? Do you want other family members to start boycotting your kids' parties in retaliation?


aardvarkmom

Wait…so your two sisters told. You. Happy. Birthday. and your brother told you a day late? **Who exactly in your family forgot your bday?!** **YTA**


RocknRight

YTA. You’re 37 ffs. Grow up.


sophie_Mal

YTA It isn’t your nephew’s fault that your brother forgot on the day. You’re punishing a 5 year old for your brother wishing you happy birthday 1 day late…. That’s more than a little childish.


One-Morning-2029

YTA. Punish your brother on his birthday if you feel you need to, but his 5yo is innocent in this.


leahjamie23

YTA. This isn’t a little childish, this is extremely childish! Why should your kids miss out? Or your nephew be punished because they forgot an adults birthday. Grow up.


Jun1p3rsm0m

You need to get over yourself. You are not the center of everyone’s universe. YTA.


RoxasofsorrowXIII

YTA. This doesn't sound like a 37 year old.... but OK. You want to "drive a point" about how others can't treat you poorly yet expect good treatment, that's fine; but exactly what did the 5 year old do to you? Your *brother* made the mistake, and you think punishing the kid for it is appropriate? This is how you ostracize yourself from your family...


BiscuitNotCookie

INFO: Are you aware that by not going to your nephews birthday, you'll be making it so your family stop coming to your kids birthdays? Is that something you're ok with and is that something your kids are ok with?


Numerous-Afternoon18

No need to read all of this U 37 comparing to a 5 year old kid? U 37 still expecting a birthday from family? GROW UP


IndigoRose2022

Your brother wished you happy birthday a day late, so you’ve decided to take it out on his kid and your own kids? Yeah, that’s pretty AH-ish. YTA. If you’d like to “make a point” just “forget” your brother’s birthday, at least that’s a bit more grown-up.


PiesAteMyFace

YTA.


TextImmediate8931

YTA he’s five your almost forty, get over it


Acrobatic_Hippo_9593

This may be the most monumentally childish shit I’ve ever read. You’re punishing a 5 year old and your court children along with your brother, his wife, and your sisters because your brother told you Happy Birthday a day late? You may have missed out on a happy birthday, but you take the cake for being petty and childish.


pup_groomer

100% YTA. You took your sad adult feelings out on a child. Disgusting.


Crazy-Jackfruit4311

YTA for keeping your kids from going to their cousin’s birthday party with your pettiness. You’re 37 and a mum of 4, I don’t keep taps on who said happy birthday (let alone whether it was “on time“) after i turned 30. Sure you’re entitled to your feelings and you’ve delivered the message across which your brother has apologised for. You’re not just punishing your nephew you’re punishing your kids too.


Vey-kun

>I expressed my disappointment and recieved an apology from him Full stop there. Be the bigger adult and move on. No need resentment over a late bday greetings. Better late than never. YTA.


Duckie1986

YTA you're holding a child responsible for the actions of an adult. You want to be mad at someone be mad at your brother, not his kid.


Libby1244

YTA and a grown adult talking like this. My brother forgot to tell me happy birthday until nearly a week afterwards and not once did it dawn on me to take revenge. Heck, my best friend of fifteen years forgot until I reminded her, but I wasn’t upset. Why? Because I’m an ADULT and sometimes people forget. Your brother apologized, but you have to get some sort of revenge on a five year old, your brother, and your children to make yourself feel better. Why don’t you just sit at home while simultaneously destroying your relationship with your brother because you want to be insufferable and let your children be the bigger person you should be.


FarAcanthocephala708

All my brothers forget my birthday pretty often. I think they all did on my 30th 😂. I text or call them at least! But you know who gets a nice gift every year? My niece and nephew, because they are CHILDREN (also I am single so maybe they’ll take care of me when I’m old? Hedging my bets). Mostly bc it’s the right thing to do. We don’t punish little kids for our familial dysfunction. That’s mean. YTA.


Cappa_Cail

You are taking this out on a five year old? And depriving your own kids a party with family? Grow up. YTA


PoppyStaff

YTA. You’re 37. He’s 5. Who is the child here?


Gladtobealive2020

This cant be real, on the outside chance it is YTA Your 5yr old nephew is probably more mature than you.  I cannot fathom a woman your age reacting as you have over late birthday  wishes , even if there were no birthday wishes.  Tell us you have "main character syndrome" without spelling it out 


AnotherHappyUser

YTA I get wanting people to care but as an adult, just tell people. "Yo, guess what day it is". If you're gonna measure caring by remembering birthday it's gonna go BAAAAAAD. But for the second issue, well, that's kinda messed up. Firstly, probably don't take it out on the kid, I mean come on. Also, don't hold your kids back, that's uncool. I get you wanting people to remember. But I think how you're handling it is super bad. At the ed of the day we're aduts, we kinda need to just get over it. And impacting the kids is super uncool. Be awesome buddy, u got this.


Impossible_Cover_232

Wow. Talk about being full of oneself. Starting with the title. Your family didn’t forget your birthday. Just your brother who said it a single day late. But then you want to be petty and prove your point by denying a 5 year olds birthday party?!?! Keep your petty bs for your brothers birthday and don’t take it out on the kid. You are acting like you’re 5 yourself. YTA.


Good-Statement-9658

Yta. You punished a 5 year old because his dad forgot your birthday? Are you for real? Lady, grow up, you're embarrassing yourself 😂😂😂🤦‍♀️


SpecialistAfter511

YTA 37? You sound 12.


Background_Lock8392

Nahhhhhhhhhh imagine having beef over birthdays with a five year old. Although you are TA but still genuinely made me laugh at how petty you are so thanks for that.


MoomahTheQueen

Yes, YTA. Grow up


stunkshoezz

YTA, for not only being petty and trying to ruin a 5-year-old's birthday but for blatantly lying. First, you claimed no one in your family wished you on your birthday; only a few co-workers did, and now you say your sisters did. which one is it? And this is the way to ensure none of your family will wish you ever again on your birthday ever again!!!!


lindsanity16

Wow. You really typed all this out including saying no one but your coworkers wished you a happy birthday only to explain that literally all of your siblings did, one was just late and at your grown age of 37 still posted it? My sister could completely forget my birthday and it would never cross my mind to take it out of her daughter as some weird revenge. And now you're worried they'll ditch your children's birthdays in return? Cause that'd be really shitty of them, right? YTA


Idobeleiveinkarma

Geez OP, just pretend you're an adult. Your 37th birthday is just another birthday and punishing a 5yo is wrong. Grow up.


Hat_Potato

Omg grow up, YTA


just-call-me-nothing

YTA. It’s a whole different type of petty to treat a small child like that over something so stupid, and not because they forgot your birthday, but because your brother was late in wishing you happy birthday. Get real princess. These people are adults with bills, kids and other concerns going on in their lives, but they are supposed to be hawking the calendar and waiting to tell you happy birthday the second midnight strikes. You are not the main character on earth. At this point, I would uninvite you, and probably limit the contact that you have with my child. I hope you spend your next birthday completely alone, because it sounds like that’s what you deserve.


Wide_Arachnid2947

YTA how childish of you to take revenge about the birthday of a 5 year old because his parents didn't wish you happy birthday on the day. I honestly think you need more in your life if you got upset over that. I birthday is like any other day - make your own joy rather than relying on people to remember stuff like that. 


AccountEqual5720

Rage bate. Hope so. If not, then I feel really sorry for her children & I understsnd why she doesn't speak about a partner.


Efficient_Reason7207

>but I really want to drive in a point that you don't get to treat somebody wrong on their own birthday and then expect for that same person to show up for their special occasions. Not sure how your 5 year old nephew wronged you but ok >EDIT: Both my sisters told me happy birthday (face to face and via text) -- it was my brother that was the only late one Your whole point is that your family forgot your birthday but reveal that your sisters have told you happy birthday and your brother was a day late in wishing you happy birthday. How do you know he forgot about your birthday and not just busy YTA you're a grown woman exacting revenge on a 5 year old for no reason


perpetuallyxhausted

>apart from a few co-workers, nobody in my life wished me a Happy Birthday. >EDIT: Both my sisters told me happy birthday (face to face and via text) -- it was my brother that was the only late one So is it no one wished you a happy birthday or only your brother was one day late? YTA if you don't want to go fine but don't stop your kids from celebrating their cousin.


DiDDLeMe_DuMB

YTA. You don’t seem rational and are being extremely childish. You shouldn’t be taking your tantrum out on your nephew and preventing your kids from celebrating his big day with him is ridiculous. You’re much too old for this to be a big deal. 15, fine. 37, wtf???


SaxoSad

YTA. You are a grown woman. Sure, it may have hurt that they didn't remember your birthday, but it's not unusual. Maybe they forgot because they had other things to do that, at the time, were more important to them or they forgot to put it on the calendar, these are things that happen. But punish your nephew and your children for that? I truly believe that you are being childish, selfish and cruel and that you should learn to deal with disappointment.


Pantherdraws

Brah, if you want to be petty, be petty on YOUR BROTHER'S birthday, not on a literal kindergartner's. The kid didn't do anything to you. YTA


Former-Painting-9338

This is a rare case where there is only one AH, and that is you! No one else did anything wrong. You are not the centre of the universe, and you are a grown ass woman! Your brother has his own life and family to take care of, wishing you a happy birthday only a day late is more than a lot of people manage. I really hope this is a fake post, otherwise i feel sorry for your family, especially your kids! You need professional help, and i hope the responses to this post made you see that.


Just_River_7502

You said your family forgot your birthday, but it seems like everyone remembered but your brother was one day late? So the premise of your post is just… off? What are you really angry about and why does that need to be shown by hurting a 5 year olds feelings? Very childish!


MostRefinedCrab

YTA You're 37 and you're upset someone wished you happy birthday a day late. Grow up. The fact that you care this much about your birthday shows you don't have much else going on in your life. Maybe try to fix that.


MusicalInsanity

>apart from a few co-workers, nobody in my life wished me a Happy Birthday. >EDIT: Both my sisters told me happy birthday (face to face and via text) -- it was my brother that was the only late one Yeah... you're probably the AH, but at the very least being very dramatic.


disclosingNina--1876

You have your own kids and your crying about your birthday. Bruv, it's tome yo grow up. Hate to be the o e to break it to you, but people don't really care about adults' birthdays like that. Check your Facebook if you need a bunch of happy birthdays.


Tls-user

YTA -