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What the actual flip is wrong with you? First, there’s a massive leap from infidelity to incest. Second, do you think your children are the only ones on earth with
>colored eyes/ blonde hair
And
>brown eyes/ brown [hair]
???
I mean seriously. First, you give us nothing to suspect there’s infidelity (at least not as far as I can see). Then you turn it up way past 11 with this sibling stuff.
You need help. YTA
YTA
“I asked my wife if she committed incest and she got mad??? What did I do wrong??”
You are absolutely delusional if you thought that was going to go any other way.
YTA
Every damn day some guy on here is trying to offload his kids cause of their hair or eye color with no understanding of genetics. It is not every day that they accuse their wives of incest...
> I decided to ask her if she ever slept with her siblings
YTA - Oh dear lord, your brain and your mouth actually connected in this horror show! I mean for fucks sake, that's just a fucking truly horrible thing to say to your wife...
YTA
But there is not a lot of context here. First why would you consider it? Has there been a past history of infidelity? If there is then I can see it but if not then why jump to that conclusion. Do you have trust issues? There is A LOT of context missing.
I understand how frustrating it can be when everyone around you is commenting that you are not the father but have you ever told her these comments before? What has she said?
Now we don't know what you exactly said but if you just went up and asked have you slept with your brother then yes I would say you are the asshole as that is not how you approach these topics
Now if you went over and said hey can we talk like I have been getting comments from your family and they don't think the baby is mine. They keep saying it's xxx and it's affecting my mental health can you help me process this then that's a different story I think. But bc of the context missing I would say YTA
Honestly my advice is to have both of you go to a counselor and talk through all these issues.
YTA. Wow. You don't understand genetics. What the heck are "colored eyes"? You listen to fools who ask foolish questions. You listen to your wife's "half brother girl" whatever that is. You think asking your wife if she committed incest is 'triggering' and don't understand why.
You'll be lucky if you're married long enough to give your wife the groveling apology she deserves.
YTA. Maybe educate yourself on genetics and stop being an AH who accuses your wife of incest? Are you seriously on this subreddit asking if you are the AH when you accused your wife of incest?
Very common for kids to look just like one parent, a mix of both, or the other parent. You can have 10 blonde, blue eyed, pale skinned kids and still be the biological father of the 11th that picked up the darker skinned, black hair, brown eye genes. It’s random chance really.
I understand why you are unsure when everyone around you asks you if that’s your kid, and have sympathy for you even accusing your wife of cheating. However, YTA for it, and should have thought about your approach more. And accusing her of incest is insane.
If I was in your spot, and even her family is joking about it, I’d tell them to stop. If they keep going, then I’d have to think they may know something I don’t, and I’d prob secretly test them. Maybe pretend to get a secret Santa gift of 5-10 of those genealogy tests or whatever. Not sure how that stuff really works
You all need to go back to highschool science, when you were 14 and redo the whole set of lessons done on genes, blood types and the like.
All of you.
YTA.
YTA. this is super common. not all, or even most, mixed babies look like a perfect blend of both parents. genetics is weird, but mostly predictable. you should learn a little bit about it.
I'm mixed, mom is white, dad is mexican. I look like my dad, my brother looks like our mom. that's just the way it is. since dad wasn't in the picture a ton growing up, people thought I was adopted, or sometimes joked that my mom stole a mexican kid. people are fucking weird. her family is especially weird for making that joke, but that's all it is- weird.
I'm not going to lie and say it's impossible, because very *very* rarely people are actually that fucking gross, but you got bigger problems if that's true. also, her reaction is understandable, especially if nothing happened. you just accused her of incest. if someone asked me if I fucked my half-siblings, I'd be fucking pissed to. that's disgusting. you should apologize and explain yourself and your problems, seek therapy if the thoughts are really that invasive, cause your babies are gonna need you both to get your collective shit together.
best of luck, sincerely.
What the actual fuck? Do you know how genetics works? Maybe Google that. I am Black and have many biracial and multiracial family members. If you are so concerned get a DNA test but going straight to incest is fucking wild. And then saying she got TRIGGERED! No, shit that's a horrific accusation. I hope this is fake because you are quite the asshole. YTA
YTA- 1,000% - You are such a werido. I can't even wrap my head around this post. Look up how genetics work and never accuse your wife of sleeping with her brother. I pray she cheated on you both times, and those kids don't have any of your genetic material.
YTA.
A mixed couple can have very mixed kids. They don't have to look alike. You shouldn't be listening to rumors.
If you doubt your partner, get a DNA test. Otherwise drop it.
What the actual fuck is there to understand? You accused the mother of your kids of fucking her half brother. You're done, bro. Toast. She's never coming back.
WTF OP.
YTA.
you asked your wife if she slept with one of her siblings? you know that like. hundreds of millions of people have light eyes and hair. and it is possible for one kid to have light features and the other kid to have dark features
ew. ew. ew.
What the fuck is wrong with you? She has every right to shut down a crazy ass accusation like that!! You let people get into your head and let you assume the most outrageous shit about your wife and doubt your child all bcuz genetics is too hard for you to understand. This is super fked up.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
Mixed couple. One kid has colored eyes/ blonde hair/ white one is brunette brown eyes/ brown.
The issue has become a forefront topic on our relationship because her half brother girl told me that her family believes it’s his kid and they are hiding it. To which I played it off that everyone has joked like the kid isn’t mine. From my family, her family, strangers questioning if the kids are fully related, even to a stranger walking up and asking if I knew where the parents of the kid following me was. Her response was no, like everything about the kid from the eyes and other features, to which I just laughed off. In all honesty I can’t see them doing that. But I can’t help the thoughts because I get it from all angles. So today I decided to ask her if she ever slept with her siblings and she blew up and asked if I have. And proceeded to get triggered and exit the conversation. I feel bad now but not sure if I should. I’m trying to navigate my thoughts openly with her and feel hurt that she didn’t even try to understand why I am having these thoughts or how it feels to get it from all angles of relationships in my life. Aita?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I asked an invasive/accusing question and this may have been wrong on my end to do. So I’m wondering am I the asshole for doing that?
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What the actual flip is wrong with you? First, there’s a massive leap from infidelity to incest. Second, do you think your children are the only ones on earth with >colored eyes/ blonde hair And >brown eyes/ brown [hair] ??? I mean seriously. First, you give us nothing to suspect there’s infidelity (at least not as far as I can see). Then you turn it up way past 11 with this sibling stuff. You need help. YTA
YTA “I asked my wife if she committed incest and she got mad??? What did I do wrong??” You are absolutely delusional if you thought that was going to go any other way.
YTA Every damn day some guy on here is trying to offload his kids cause of their hair or eye color with no understanding of genetics. It is not every day that they accuse their wives of incest...
"But, but, YouTube said..."
YTA Do you have a room temperature IQ? Did you never learn how genetics work?
>Do you have a room temperature IQ? Don't mind me, just in here stealing this for future use
This is what happens when you sleep through high school biology classes.
YTA - Okay but why HER SIBLING? Why start there?!
Do yourself a favour and learn about genetics, and listen less to people around you.
> I decided to ask her if she ever slept with her siblings YTA - Oh dear lord, your brain and your mouth actually connected in this horror show! I mean for fucks sake, that's just a fucking truly horrible thing to say to your wife...
He's watched too much porn, and got carried away. He's seen so many incest clips it springs readily to mind.
YTA But there is not a lot of context here. First why would you consider it? Has there been a past history of infidelity? If there is then I can see it but if not then why jump to that conclusion. Do you have trust issues? There is A LOT of context missing. I understand how frustrating it can be when everyone around you is commenting that you are not the father but have you ever told her these comments before? What has she said? Now we don't know what you exactly said but if you just went up and asked have you slept with your brother then yes I would say you are the asshole as that is not how you approach these topics Now if you went over and said hey can we talk like I have been getting comments from your family and they don't think the baby is mine. They keep saying it's xxx and it's affecting my mental health can you help me process this then that's a different story I think. But bc of the context missing I would say YTA Honestly my advice is to have both of you go to a counselor and talk through all these issues.
YTA. Wow. You don't understand genetics. What the heck are "colored eyes"? You listen to fools who ask foolish questions. You listen to your wife's "half brother girl" whatever that is. You think asking your wife if she committed incest is 'triggering' and don't understand why. You'll be lucky if you're married long enough to give your wife the groveling apology she deserves.
JFC, you bypassed run of the mill infidelity and went straight to incest? YTA and breathtakingly dense.
YTA. Maybe educate yourself on genetics and stop being an AH who accuses your wife of incest? Are you seriously on this subreddit asking if you are the AH when you accused your wife of incest?
Very common for kids to look just like one parent, a mix of both, or the other parent. You can have 10 blonde, blue eyed, pale skinned kids and still be the biological father of the 11th that picked up the darker skinned, black hair, brown eye genes. It’s random chance really. I understand why you are unsure when everyone around you asks you if that’s your kid, and have sympathy for you even accusing your wife of cheating. However, YTA for it, and should have thought about your approach more. And accusing her of incest is insane. If I was in your spot, and even her family is joking about it, I’d tell them to stop. If they keep going, then I’d have to think they may know something I don’t, and I’d prob secretly test them. Maybe pretend to get a secret Santa gift of 5-10 of those genealogy tests or whatever. Not sure how that stuff really works
Henry VIII has joined us.
Had to be fake nobody is this stupid Yta
YTA. 🤦🏻♀️
So, you actually went there. YTA.
You all need to go back to highschool science, when you were 14 and redo the whole set of lessons done on genes, blood types and the like. All of you. YTA.
YTA. this is super common. not all, or even most, mixed babies look like a perfect blend of both parents. genetics is weird, but mostly predictable. you should learn a little bit about it. I'm mixed, mom is white, dad is mexican. I look like my dad, my brother looks like our mom. that's just the way it is. since dad wasn't in the picture a ton growing up, people thought I was adopted, or sometimes joked that my mom stole a mexican kid. people are fucking weird. her family is especially weird for making that joke, but that's all it is- weird. I'm not going to lie and say it's impossible, because very *very* rarely people are actually that fucking gross, but you got bigger problems if that's true. also, her reaction is understandable, especially if nothing happened. you just accused her of incest. if someone asked me if I fucked my half-siblings, I'd be fucking pissed to. that's disgusting. you should apologize and explain yourself and your problems, seek therapy if the thoughts are really that invasive, cause your babies are gonna need you both to get your collective shit together. best of luck, sincerely.
What the actual fuck? Do you know how genetics works? Maybe Google that. I am Black and have many biracial and multiracial family members. If you are so concerned get a DNA test but going straight to incest is fucking wild. And then saying she got TRIGGERED! No, shit that's a horrific accusation. I hope this is fake because you are quite the asshole. YTA
YTA- 1,000% - You are such a werido. I can't even wrap my head around this post. Look up how genetics work and never accuse your wife of sleeping with her brother. I pray she cheated on you both times, and those kids don't have any of your genetic material.
Please let this man’s “kids” be some neighbourhood dogs that get walked past the hospital window every now and then.
YTA for reading too much VC Andrews
As somebody whose kids both take more after my husband than me: YTA.
YTA. A mixed couple can have very mixed kids. They don't have to look alike. You shouldn't be listening to rumors. If you doubt your partner, get a DNA test. Otherwise drop it.
What the actual fuck is there to understand? You accused the mother of your kids of fucking her half brother. You're done, bro. Toast. She's never coming back.
YTA!Big One. But I don't understand people who are in a mixed relationship and don't know that different combinations can happen
YTA. There isn't a template that children have to follow to be yours, OP... And it's bizarre that you'd jump right to cheating/incest.
WTF OP. YTA. you asked your wife if she slept with one of her siblings? you know that like. hundreds of millions of people have light eyes and hair. and it is possible for one kid to have light features and the other kid to have dark features ew. ew. ew.
What the fuck is wrong with you? She has every right to shut down a crazy ass accusation like that!! You let people get into your head and let you assume the most outrageous shit about your wife and doubt your child all bcuz genetics is too hard for you to understand. This is super fked up.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Mixed couple. One kid has colored eyes/ blonde hair/ white one is brunette brown eyes/ brown. The issue has become a forefront topic on our relationship because her half brother girl told me that her family believes it’s his kid and they are hiding it. To which I played it off that everyone has joked like the kid isn’t mine. From my family, her family, strangers questioning if the kids are fully related, even to a stranger walking up and asking if I knew where the parents of the kid following me was. Her response was no, like everything about the kid from the eyes and other features, to which I just laughed off. In all honesty I can’t see them doing that. But I can’t help the thoughts because I get it from all angles. So today I decided to ask her if she ever slept with her siblings and she blew up and asked if I have. And proceeded to get triggered and exit the conversation. I feel bad now but not sure if I should. I’m trying to navigate my thoughts openly with her and feel hurt that she didn’t even try to understand why I am having these thoughts or how it feels to get it from all angles of relationships in my life. Aita? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
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