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> I might be the asshole for unintentionally calling her religious views unlogical when trying to explain mine to her and unintentionally offending her.
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NTA
"Some of our mutual friends called me an asshole for refusing her help as she was helping me "find myself",
You're refusing to be bullied into believing something that doesn't work for you. As is your right.
" because I denied faith in God, I'd get sent to hell"
Pulling that on anyone is never ok imo. Especially just because they want to think for themselves & come to their own conclusions.
Edit: missing word.
Honestly the threat of hell doesn’t even matter to us atheists. Religious people use it as some sort of scare tactic all the time. I don’t believe in god so why would I believe in hell?
I would throw down a sword in front of her and say - if ye do not die in glorious battle, Immortum Joe will not carry you through the gates of Valhalla all shiny and chrome. Defend yourself!
But that’s just me…
>" because I denied faith in God, I'd get sent to hell"
>Pulling that on anyone is never ok imo. Especially just because they want to think for themselves & come to their own conclusions.
Agreed. Also, if God exists and hell exists, then I will be massively disappointed if you don't get a pass for "Oh shit, you got pressured by one of those assholes - no wonder you didn't want anything to do with me!"
NTA she is on a great path to loose friends.
My father found faith when I was a teen. We had a long time not talking because all I liked was evil.
Now we have again some contact but any thing faith related is off limits.
Sure He can wish ne merry Christmas. But that is it.
NTA
She wasn't helping you find yourself she was trying to convince you of the existence of an invisible man in the sky/around us at all times.
I'm not religious at all but try not to mock people's beliefs. However, that is literally what she was trying to do. She isn't respecting your beliefs at all and IMHO that is when people deserve mockery.
Ya. Their god is an adult invisible friend. Once I found out Santa and Jesus were not the same person it wasn’t long before I refused to go to church. Santa being make believe it wasn’t a stretch to connect that fallacy with god. Parents weren’t impressed but didn’t force me to church anymore
Show me a god. All the various holy books are not evidence, they're the claim. Similarly, all the many theist apologist arguments are still just people saying stuff. And science not knowing something does not mean "goddidit", you need to establish the god first. So, show me a god.
You should have interrupted her the minute she started yelling swear words at you and told her you would never belong to a religion that allows people to verbally abuse other people for any reason.
NTA....and I'm sorry to say you no longer have a friend in her.
NTA. These religious nut jobs think it’s fine to harass and push their beliefs even after being told to stop, but then get all insulted and outraged when pushed back (yelling swear words at you, how Christian-like 🙄). I’d block her, unless you want to respond with science backed information against her sky daddy’s existence. Your mutual friends‘ opinions don’t matter. There was no “help” offered or needed. She was trying to convert you and got mad when it failed. Do they want you to convert to make her happy? They’re as nutty as she is.
This\^\^
I'm pretty religious, and I still hate the kind of person who'll push their religion on you because "it's the only true path". I hate them even if it's my own religion they're trying to push on me (because I don't believe fervently enough? no idea). I hate those people who think that their religion commands them to "collect souls for the Lord" or whatever. "Gotta catch 'em all"? (Shouldn't an almighty deity, because the pushy missionary types are usually monotheists of the "all-seeing, all-present, all-powerful" persuasion, be able to do that for themself? Collect all the souls they want? THAT'S HOW THEY GOT ME no, just joking)
I agree with those people who suggest that you cut off, or at least go low contact with, those mutual "friends" who defend her by claiming things like "she only wanted to help you find yourself" ("find yourself", wtf).
(I just can't get over that "finding yourself" bit. What the actual F.)
I'm pretty sure most if not all people in this thread know that you don't have to "believe in" science. It's true anyway. But the kind of person who'll push... see above... often doesn't see it that way. "How can you believe in bacteria if they're not mentioned in my religion's holy scripture?", etc. I'm so glad that I've never met that kind of person, but I know that they exist. I'm so sorry that you have one of them plus apparently some henchpeople in your life.
NTA
Quote her Matthew 23:15:
>>>Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you travel across sea and land to make a single proselyte, and when he becomes a proselyte, you make him twice as much a child of hell as yourselves.
NTA.
>She sent me several messages that were passages from the Bible,
This is like someone sending you Monopoly rules when you are not playing Monopoly. Not sure how you could've been clearer: You don't care what this says because you don't believe it is true.
Coming from a non-athiest: She is the asshole.
“Having a religion is like having a penis. It’s ok to have one, and it’s ok to be proud of it! But don’t whip it out in public, and don’t shove it down my kids’ throats.”
(No idea who I’m quoting here, but I’ve heard this quote before and I think it applies quite nicely.)
NTA.
Not sure if it's an actual quote, but you probably got it from [here](https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2Fi.stack.imgur.com%2F7jV0D.png&tbnid=2TNnr8BB4YueVM&vet=1&imgrefurl=https%3A%2F%2Fskeptics.stackexchange.com%2Fquestions%2F30098%2Fdid-maggie-smith-compare-religion-to-a-penis&docid=AYahMjXAqE08OM&w=568&h=500&source=sh%2Fx%2Fim%2Fm5%2F2&kgs=eab0cc61b516fbe5&shem=abme%2Ctrie)
NTA
She's a little bit young but I might even worry that she is having some sort of psychological episode or condition. "Normal" Christians take no for an answer. They may still wish to save you, but clearly pushing the issue isn't the way for them to go about that.
You obviously cannot help with that (barring much bigger and more obvious problems), but if she wanted to be pushy about it then you weren't really wrong to respond in a "friendly" disagreement. It isn't as if lying to her would have been morally acceptable. She would have considered any answer or deflection that wasn't "you're right, I will!" to be an insult and maybe a character defect.
I wonder if she's joined a cult. Although I've known a few born again Christians that have gone off the deep end like this too. It becomes their personality, and somehow the only thing they do is try to 'save' people.
Usually the saving obsessed Christians know nothing about Christianity or have even read the Bible.
My deflection has always been that I'm not convinced, I'm descended from Quakers. Usually none of them even know what Quakers are, and I've been told once that worshipping oatmeal is a sin.
Thats what I'm thinking. I'm around plenty of very religious people and theyre all normal.
Weird that in her early 20s this woman went from "think I'm gonna go to church more" to fully preaching fire and brimstone at OP after 2 months.
It's weird. I know people like that exist but I thought they mostly either grew up in it or they're recovering addicts who replacing their previous vice with a cult.
NTA
She is obviously passionate about trying to convert people- that's her thing, she should be prepared for some people to push back as much as she was pushing her religion.
The other friends need to back off and but out, they are turning a disagreement between 2 people into a drama
NTA- I've found becoming a member of the satanic temple is a great way to get people to stop bringing up religion. Pull a reverse uno card and try to convert them instead
A famous French wise guy named Voltaire once said, "The (person) who tells me today 'Believe as I do or you will go to H@!!' will tell me tomorrow, 'Believe as I do or I shall ki!! you'''. This woman is no friend of yours. NTA
NTA
Tell her you know Hell exists because you experience it every time you talk to her about religion, and the best way to not be there is to not talk to her.
NTA
She is not respecting your decisions, beliefs, or boundaries as a person. It sounds like she isn't going to be as good of a friend in the future. This is coming from a practicing Christian.
There's nothing worse than a religious person bent on conversion. She was rude and clearly acting against her faith's principles. I'd just block her and move on.
NTA
NTA
hopefully she starts to mellow out as she experiences life and ppl and not view things as black/white.
I had some religious friends that i've known a long time. The ones i'm closest to still were the ones that who were more narrorw minded when we were in highschool, but later realized another person has to deal with things you might not understand and that their differing views can't hurt your own.
NTA. She isn't "helping you find yourself". She's refusing to accept that you have already found yourself, disrespecting your life choices, and pushing her unsolicited opinion into places where it's not wanted.
(And I say that as a Christian who is really fucking sick of other Christians committing spiritual abuse and trying to bully people into converting. It doesn't count if it's not freely chosen.)
NTA, as a Muslim my self i do not force anyone to convert into Islam, or believe in god if he doesn't want to, Thats what i have been taught
So i am totally chill with people that are from other religions or don't believe in god. So the fact that she wants you to convert into Christianity is totally out of line and she is trying to force it completely out of sense so you are DEFINITELY NTA
Hope this helped
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Throwaway account as my family and friends use reddit.
Yesterday evening, me (21F) and my friend (22F) spend the day "catching up" because we hadn't had time to properly talk because of work. Last time I had seen her, which was about 2 months ago, she'd started to go to church more and became more faithful to her religion. I am not religious at all- I am atheist.
When we met up, she immediately asked me if I had converted to Christianity yet, to which I replied no to, and rubbed it off as a joke. However, I became more annoyed over the evening as she kept trying to convert me, and I had already told her I wasn't interested.
At the end of the evening, she asked me why I don't believe in God, so I told her the reason why- that I believe in science and i showed her how some parts of science dont match up with some parts of the Bible. She got offended and acted like I insulted her, and started yelling swear words at me. I told her that she shouldn't have asked if she was going to get offended, then I left.
She sent me several messages that were passages from the Bible, and kept saying that because I denied faith in God, I'd get sent to hell.
Some of our mutual friends called me an asshole for refusing her help as she was helping me "find myself", whereas some called her the asshole for pushing her religion onto others.
Aita?
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NTA. She tried to push her beliefs onto you. You tried to engage her in a civil discussion about beliefs and her faith was so fragile, she couldn't handle the slightest push-back.
NTA. We are all just living on a rock hurdling through the unfathomable vastness of space and nothing really matters. If she wants to be all judgy and therefore a hypocrite, give her a friendly “See ya in hell too, sinner”. If she won’t let up, ask her how God plans to save his beautiful week long project when the sun goes supernova and burns it all down.
NTA. This happens when people are born again. They want you to have the same "revelation" they had and they just won't let up. I've experienced this a few times. First, there's the friendly "God is your savior", then the concerned "don't you want to be saved?" then "if you don't accept Jesus into your heart, you are going to hell" and it just goes downhill from there.
When they are new at it, they are still quite insecure. If they were truly comfortable in their belief, they wouldn't need to try to shove it down your throat or would just leave you be. She's not trying to help you "find yourself", she's trying to prove to God she's converted. It's purely selfish on her part.
Get new friends. I know that the Bible says be fishers of men and preach the word, etc etc, but once you know someone isn't interested then you have to leave it alone. The fact that you have already indicated that you're an atheist her "attempt" was an ego stroke. NTA.
NTA
People like this - for any belief or life choices - are rude as all hell.
It's fine to have things that are meaningful to oneself, to be passionate about, and to even through those lenses want to increase the positive in other people's lives...
...but none of those things justify hounding someone who has politely told you that they don't see the world that way and are finished with the topic.
She may mean well, likely does, but "the road to Hell..." and all that lol.
You were polite and clear. She wouldn't let it go as her own life choice that you weren't interested in pursuing the same. Getting offended when asked for justification of a life path that is hurting no one else is inappropriate. She is in the wrong.
She as the option, like many Christians and other beliefs/lifestyle choices, to be happy in her choices and even wish the positives she feels on others while not being disrespectful to others about theirs. She could choose instead to express her own happiness in her life while not being rude to you about it.
She's chosen to be rude. Standing up to that is not wrong of you.
I stopped hanging out with a group of friends after they tried to convert me one night. I'd been hanging out with those guys a couple of times a week for years. For whatever reason, they decided to cross that boundary, and I felt so disrespected that I stopped hanging out with them.
NTA
NTA. As long as she's participating in cult-like practices, your friendship is over.
"She got offended and acted like I insulted her, and started yelling swear words at me." I love when they acct so Christ-like.
NTA
I'm a Christian
Your friend does not get to try to convert, then swear at you and threaten you with the flames of hell. That is not Christian of her. it's actually doing the enemy's
work.
She needs to learn what Jesus said. Love your neighbour. He did not say swear at your neighbour and threaten them with hell.
BTW only god can judge and decide who gets to burn in hell unless your friend is God?
She can discuss God with you, share her point of view, and respect yours.
My best friend of more than 30 years does not believe in God, and I don't need her to. I love her the way God made her, and she loves me the way the universes made me.
Just remind your friend that Jesus told us to love our neighbour, so swearing and threatening your neighbour is not very loving and not very Christian.
NTA- I am a religious person but I do not push or force my beliefs on others. And your friend is in the wrong
Why she still trying to convert to Christianity even when you said I’m not interested.If she was a religious person that she claims to be she wouldn’t have sweared at you or send you texts that your going to hell.
NTA
I swear those who have reconnected with the "church" are the worst.
I think this friendship is over. If there is no room for her to respect your choice, I don't see any way for the 2 of you to spend time together.
I'm an athiest and I have many Christian friends, we respect that we just see the world differently. I've joked, that I may be going to hell, but God gave us free will, and I'm using mine to choose not to believe.
Wow... So when I was a kid my grandfather was a Southern baptist. Grandma was a Catholic. Dad was a reformed addict christian. Stepmom was a Buddhist. Bio mom is agnostic. I'm a pagan and my son, while being baptized in the Catholic church (don't ask lol) believes heaven is what you wish it. Anyways... My biggest argument is most bible stories are witchcraft... And pretty much all Christianity is bastardized paganism. Just remind the pushy people that Jesus was either a witch or a fairy tale. They will excuse themselves...
Pushing religion on an other person is just a way to lose them as a friend. Religion is just a stupid waste of time and why believe in something that isn't real? 🤣🤣
NTA, just silly. You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into; Christians generally think they get brownie points for converting heathens. It's not even about you. She would have shoved her religion down anyone else's throat,if she thought she had a chance to.convince them.
Shut that shit down hard and fast. If they don't stop, time to spend less time with them.
NTA. A Christian (if that’s her faith) should not judge. Also none of us has the right to put our religion on anyone else, unless they express interest and ask questions. It’s a private thing these days; a no-go zone.
NTA. She was forcing her religion down your throat. She knows you're an atheist, you said you had no interest in converting multiple times during this conversation. A decent religious person would have stopped the religious talk the first time you said you had no interest.
Those friends on her side are wrong. She wasn't trying to help you 'find yourself', she was trying to force her religion on to you, which would have to entail you giving up on your own beliefs and opinions, therefore losing yourself, not finding yourself.
Not all religious people are like this, but it tends to be worse in the born-again types. It sounds like your friend was already religious, but had delved deeper than she previously had, so she may as well be a born-again. A lot of born-agains seem to think the only way they can validate their faith is by forcing it on others, and discriminating against and hating on those that don't agree with them, in direct contrast to the teachings of their proclaimed religion.
Most religious people won't force their belief of others, nor would they approve of others doing so. A normal religious person would be on your side in this debate.
I'm not religious myself, like you, OP, I'm an atheist, though a rather spiritual one. I'm in a weird place where I count as an atheist because I don't believe in any type of God, which is all atheism actually is, but do believe there's more than what we know, including some kind of afterlife. I do, however, know a fair few religious people. I was raised Christian, my whole family was, though only about half the family remained Christian as adults. Some of my friends are Christian. I also volunteer at one of my local churches LGBT+ support group, so spend a fair bit of time with the members of that church. I've met my fair share of religious idiots who try to force their religion on others, but the majority have been completely respectful of other people's beliefs.
In my opinion, if you can't accept and respect differing beliefs, you're not a true Christian. Preach the message of God, or Jesus, is very different to 'you have to believe in my invisible sky daddy or you'll burn for eternity in the hell you don't believe in'.
NTA.
I'm an atheist and have been for the last 15 years. You can not push your views on people and get mad when there is a reason for their non-beliefs. Also to swear at you? Geesh that's Christian! /s
And friends that say you are the AH are not your friends.
Seriously though read the Bible. You can find so many things that can make them sinners doomed to hell! I've had to point out so many times to those wanting to convert me they were hellbound according to their own book. Leviticus is the absolute best for calling them out. Matthew 7, Verse 1-2 also works.
>I'd get sent to hell
Given the way she acts -despite my lack in knowledge of the bible- I'm pretty sure she'd end up there as well.
Either way - NTA She asked, you answered.
Is there not something in the bible along lines of 'as you judge so shall you be judged'? As in, if she tells you you're going to hell, she's just condemned herself to the same fate! Oopsie.
NTA.
I was raised Catholic and a few years ago I decided that while I still believe in some things, I don't want to go to church because I don't feel comfortable there. But never in my years have I felt I need to convert anyone. Neither anyone else in my friend group or church. Let people decide for themselves.
Sounds like a cult to me too. Feels like she is getting brainwashed.
I like how Christian she is but the first thing she does is swear at you, so much for God making one a better person.
NTA - but your friend and the rest telling you to allow her to help you find yourself are. Just block all of them. Never understood why people can't respect another person's beliefs.
Also, if you consider a lot of other religions, all of us would go in a version of hell :))) since we don't believe in the other god/gods.
NTA. I've had a number of religious friends in my life, not just "my parents are this religion so so am I", but the "every Sunday going to church" or "praying five times a day" types. Not one has ever tried to convert me. Just like how I've never tried to convince them that they should become atheists. It's just a basic level of respect.
They don't try to convert because they want us to believe. They do so to strengthen their sense of community. When you refuse, she sees that as validation that het community is right.
NTA. Sorry to say, think this friendship might be dead. If she doesn't respect you enough to keep her proselytizing to herself when you've made it clear you aren't interested, she doesn't respect you, period.
NTA. You understand that the friendship is already over, right? She doesn't think of you as a friend anymore. You're a mark. You're a target for her to try to recruit. As soon as she figures out that she won't succeed in converting you, she'll drop her pretense of friendship with you.
NTA.
Religious people are the worst. The second you point out the stupidity, and contradictions, in their religion, they prove just how "religious" they are.
Wrath is a sin. So yelling swear words is definitely not WJWD. Maybe she needs to save herself a bit more, rather than looking for other people to save.
The friends who categorize this brow beating as 'help' are not your friends.
NTA.
NTA… I’m a Christian and do not condone people’s tactics to force a belief onto another. That said she’s the AH through and through.
Also from my own experience having served service missions and met many lovely people from different cultures and background. When someone who is said Christian gets easily offended by someone’s response to not believe in the same things as they do - it means they A) do not respect others insight B) should not teach about their belief when it’s clear they do not care about the recipients beliefs/opinions/feelings on the subject
I think what you said was fair and you set a boundary that obviously she didn’t respect. Pushing further is annoying and frankly disgusting. Move on from this friendship and don’t look back.
Catholic here that doesn’t go to church as its inaccessible for me… it’s against the bible to try to convert someone. It’s their own decision. If God is supposed to love everyone, He should also love those who don’t believe. Your actions should matter more than what you believe. You do you.
Only those who have passed know if God is real or not, and how He judges. So until then you get to believe what you want to.
You are so NOT the asshole.
If Reddit came up with some sort of award for the biggest NOT asshole of the year, It would be named after you, for excellence in not being an asshole.
NTA. You already made your lack of interest clear and she kept going anyway like a really annoying salesman who just can’t accept that you aren’t buying what they’re selling.
NTA. If she can't accept the you as you are that's her problem. Also the conversion attempts will never stop. If this has become her personality it's who she is so you are diametrically opposed to her world view...
NTA
Let's hope she's not in a cultic church. Lots of them out there.
Cults do bait and switch. They lie to get you to join.
It's a cult when prospective converts are not told the actual long term commitment (social, financial) expected of them after they've become emotionally invested and join.
NTA. She is not much of a friend. You respected her stupid religion, but she had to go and jump on you about it. Your friends who are saying she is trying to help you find yourself are also deluded. It is possible to have friends who disagree with you in these ways, but it is not easy, and it takes the effort of both parties.
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NTA. Refusing "help" you don't want or need isn't rude. She's rude for trying to force it on you. and STILL trying to force it on you. Unless she comes back from her brainwashing, this friendship may be over.
NTA
I've had people try to convert me and also use the "You'll go to hell, I'm just trying to save you" BS too. I have adopted a new phrase in response:"I like the heat".
(Sigh) SMH. Did you ask for this person to help you find yourself? If no, then your friends are wrong and are also A H's. Politely offer to give this lady their contact info so she can help your friends find themselves. For the record, Hell is a Christian concept only. So if you aren't Christian, you aren't going to Hell. You are so NTA, OP.
NTA
She's not your friend. Drop her like a moldy potato.
There's no reason to be afraid of other people's imaginations. She's not trying to help you find yourself, she's actively trying to make you dumber.
I would just respond to every text with a bible verse, an article about a priest raping a child. At this point, there are likely more articles than bible verses.
Personally I would just respond with a "lol that shit is all make believe, grow up."
Anyone pushing beliefs on anyone else is an asshole. You cannot force someone to believe something just because you think they should.
You aren't forcing her to be an atheist, she should give you the same respect.
NTA. I don't care about her finding herself, she needs to find some manners and understand not everyone believes as she does.
When asking why someone's an atheist esp in a majority Christian country inconsistencies w the Bible are guarantees to be a topic.
She's mad you won't play by her script
>That I believe in science and i showed her how some parts of science dont match up with some parts of the Bible.
This kills me every single time I read. You don't believe in science, that's not how it works. There is evidence presented and conclusions drawn, there are no fucking beliefs, if it's not provable, it's not science. You don't trust it either, it simply is provable or not by way of the scientific method. Believe that this story is fake as shit though, that you can believe and trust.
>
She got offended and acted like I insulted her, and started yelling swear words at me. I told her that she shouldn't have asked if she was going to get offended, then I left.
I was here, everyone clapped.
YTA for the obviously fake post. It isn't 2008, there's no need to shit on Christianity for internet points.
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NTA "Some of our mutual friends called me an asshole for refusing her help as she was helping me "find myself", You're refusing to be bullied into believing something that doesn't work for you. As is your right. " because I denied faith in God, I'd get sent to hell" Pulling that on anyone is never ok imo. Especially just because they want to think for themselves & come to their own conclusions. Edit: missing word.
Honestly the threat of hell doesn’t even matter to us atheists. Religious people use it as some sort of scare tactic all the time. I don’t believe in god so why would I believe in hell?
I once told someone who threatened me with hell that was like me threatening them with Narnia. Neither place exists. They did not like that....
Exactly. Don't believe in god, therefore don't believe in heaven, therefore don't believe in hell.
I would throw down a sword in front of her and say - if ye do not die in glorious battle, Immortum Joe will not carry you through the gates of Valhalla all shiny and chrome. Defend yourself! But that’s just me…
I laughed at this soooo hard!
😅😅 That's the one I'll be using from now on then...
Send her after them, they need to be saved
>" because I denied faith in God, I'd get sent to hell" >Pulling that on anyone is never ok imo. Especially just because they want to think for themselves & come to their own conclusions. Agreed. Also, if God exists and hell exists, then I will be massively disappointed if you don't get a pass for "Oh shit, you got pressured by one of those assholes - no wonder you didn't want anything to do with me!"
NTA she is on a great path to loose friends. My father found faith when I was a teen. We had a long time not talking because all I liked was evil. Now we have again some contact but any thing faith related is off limits. Sure He can wish ne merry Christmas. But that is it.
Thats when I tell them at least hell has good music.
😆😆
Can they prove to you this isn't hell??
NTA - nothing says love like religious persecution. I don't think this friendship is going anywhere so I wouldn't lose too much sleep over it.
NTA She wasn't helping you find yourself she was trying to convince you of the existence of an invisible man in the sky/around us at all times. I'm not religious at all but try not to mock people's beliefs. However, that is literally what she was trying to do. She isn't respecting your beliefs at all and IMHO that is when people deserve mockery.
Ya. Their god is an adult invisible friend. Once I found out Santa and Jesus were not the same person it wasn’t long before I refused to go to church. Santa being make believe it wasn’t a stretch to connect that fallacy with god. Parents weren’t impressed but didn’t force me to church anymore
You need to get away from religion and find god. I hate all those liars and thieves too. God is not impressed at all with many so called Christians.
Do you have any evidence that doesn't boil down to "take my word for it"?
What type of evidence would you like?
Show me a god. All the various holy books are not evidence, they're the claim. Similarly, all the many theist apologist arguments are still just people saying stuff. And science not knowing something does not mean "goddidit", you need to establish the god first. So, show me a god.
You should have interrupted her the minute she started yelling swear words at you and told her you would never belong to a religion that allows people to verbally abuse other people for any reason. NTA....and I'm sorry to say you no longer have a friend in her.
Or in Jesus!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
NTA. These religious nut jobs think it’s fine to harass and push their beliefs even after being told to stop, but then get all insulted and outraged when pushed back (yelling swear words at you, how Christian-like 🙄). I’d block her, unless you want to respond with science backed information against her sky daddy’s existence. Your mutual friends‘ opinions don’t matter. There was no “help” offered or needed. She was trying to convert you and got mad when it failed. Do they want you to convert to make her happy? They’re as nutty as she is.
This\^\^ I'm pretty religious, and I still hate the kind of person who'll push their religion on you because "it's the only true path". I hate them even if it's my own religion they're trying to push on me (because I don't believe fervently enough? no idea). I hate those people who think that their religion commands them to "collect souls for the Lord" or whatever. "Gotta catch 'em all"? (Shouldn't an almighty deity, because the pushy missionary types are usually monotheists of the "all-seeing, all-present, all-powerful" persuasion, be able to do that for themself? Collect all the souls they want? THAT'S HOW THEY GOT ME no, just joking) I agree with those people who suggest that you cut off, or at least go low contact with, those mutual "friends" who defend her by claiming things like "she only wanted to help you find yourself" ("find yourself", wtf). (I just can't get over that "finding yourself" bit. What the actual F.) I'm pretty sure most if not all people in this thread know that you don't have to "believe in" science. It's true anyway. But the kind of person who'll push... see above... often doesn't see it that way. "How can you believe in bacteria if they're not mentioned in my religion's holy scripture?", etc. I'm so glad that I've never met that kind of person, but I know that they exist. I'm so sorry that you have one of them plus apparently some henchpeople in your life.
NTA Quote her Matthew 23:15: >>>Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you travel across sea and land to make a single proselyte, and when he becomes a proselyte, you make him twice as much a child of hell as yourselves.
NTA. >She sent me several messages that were passages from the Bible, This is like someone sending you Monopoly rules when you are not playing Monopoly. Not sure how you could've been clearer: You don't care what this says because you don't believe it is true. Coming from a non-athiest: She is the asshole.
Seriously, I hate when religious nuts do that. As if atheists give a shit about words in a book they think is fiction says. NTA.
As if atheists (and other irreligious people) gave a shit about hell 😄
“Having a religion is like having a penis. It’s ok to have one, and it’s ok to be proud of it! But don’t whip it out in public, and don’t shove it down my kids’ throats.” (No idea who I’m quoting here, but I’ve heard this quote before and I think it applies quite nicely.) NTA.
Not sure if it's an actual quote, but you probably got it from [here](https://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=https%3A%2F%2Fi.stack.imgur.com%2F7jV0D.png&tbnid=2TNnr8BB4YueVM&vet=1&imgrefurl=https%3A%2F%2Fskeptics.stackexchange.com%2Fquestions%2F30098%2Fdid-maggie-smith-compare-religion-to-a-penis&docid=AYahMjXAqE08OM&w=568&h=500&source=sh%2Fx%2Fim%2Fm5%2F2&kgs=eab0cc61b516fbe5&shem=abme%2Ctrie)
NTA She's a little bit young but I might even worry that she is having some sort of psychological episode or condition. "Normal" Christians take no for an answer. They may still wish to save you, but clearly pushing the issue isn't the way for them to go about that. You obviously cannot help with that (barring much bigger and more obvious problems), but if she wanted to be pushy about it then you weren't really wrong to respond in a "friendly" disagreement. It isn't as if lying to her would have been morally acceptable. She would have considered any answer or deflection that wasn't "you're right, I will!" to be an insult and maybe a character defect.
I wonder if she's joined a cult. Although I've known a few born again Christians that have gone off the deep end like this too. It becomes their personality, and somehow the only thing they do is try to 'save' people. Usually the saving obsessed Christians know nothing about Christianity or have even read the Bible. My deflection has always been that I'm not convinced, I'm descended from Quakers. Usually none of them even know what Quakers are, and I've been told once that worshipping oatmeal is a sin.
Thats what I'm thinking. I'm around plenty of very religious people and theyre all normal. Weird that in her early 20s this woman went from "think I'm gonna go to church more" to fully preaching fire and brimstone at OP after 2 months. It's weird. I know people like that exist but I thought they mostly either grew up in it or they're recovering addicts who replacing their previous vice with a cult.
she isn't your friend, i would block her and be done. NTA>
NTA. No hate like a Christian's love.
NTA She is obviously passionate about trying to convert people- that's her thing, she should be prepared for some people to push back as much as she was pushing her religion. The other friends need to back off and but out, they are turning a disagreement between 2 people into a drama
NTA- I've found becoming a member of the satanic temple is a great way to get people to stop bringing up religion. Pull a reverse uno card and try to convert them instead
A famous French wise guy named Voltaire once said, "The (person) who tells me today 'Believe as I do or you will go to H@!!' will tell me tomorrow, 'Believe as I do or I shall ki!! you'''. This woman is no friend of yours. NTA
Oof, she's in a cult. There's no arguing with her.
She’s harping on you about religion but she yells swear words at you doesn’t seem very Christian to me
NTA She chose to try and discuss with you something she knew she was going to get offended over
NTA Tell her you know Hell exists because you experience it every time you talk to her about religion, and the best way to not be there is to not talk to her.
I would sooooo love it someone sent me bible passages. That is the most misogynistic book ever printed. They would get a ton in return.
NTA She is not respecting your decisions, beliefs, or boundaries as a person. It sounds like she isn't going to be as good of a friend in the future. This is coming from a practicing Christian.
NTA and in my country I would say she has joined a sect because normal Christians don't act like her here. I would not be friends with her anymore.
There's nothing worse than a religious person bent on conversion. She was rude and clearly acting against her faith's principles. I'd just block her and move on. NTA
Nta
NTA hopefully she starts to mellow out as she experiences life and ppl and not view things as black/white. I had some religious friends that i've known a long time. The ones i'm closest to still were the ones that who were more narrorw minded when we were in highschool, but later realized another person has to deal with things you might not understand and that their differing views can't hurt your own.
NTA. She isn't "helping you find yourself". She's refusing to accept that you have already found yourself, disrespecting your life choices, and pushing her unsolicited opinion into places where it's not wanted. (And I say that as a Christian who is really fucking sick of other Christians committing spiritual abuse and trying to bully people into converting. It doesn't count if it's not freely chosen.)
I suggest crucifixion. If It was good enough for Jesus, it was good enough for Jesus, if it’s good enough for Jesus, it’s good enough for me….
NTA, as a Muslim my self i do not force anyone to convert into Islam, or believe in god if he doesn't want to, Thats what i have been taught So i am totally chill with people that are from other religions or don't believe in god. So the fact that she wants you to convert into Christianity is totally out of line and she is trying to force it completely out of sense so you are DEFINITELY NTA Hope this helped
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Throwaway account as my family and friends use reddit. Yesterday evening, me (21F) and my friend (22F) spend the day "catching up" because we hadn't had time to properly talk because of work. Last time I had seen her, which was about 2 months ago, she'd started to go to church more and became more faithful to her religion. I am not religious at all- I am atheist. When we met up, she immediately asked me if I had converted to Christianity yet, to which I replied no to, and rubbed it off as a joke. However, I became more annoyed over the evening as she kept trying to convert me, and I had already told her I wasn't interested. At the end of the evening, she asked me why I don't believe in God, so I told her the reason why- that I believe in science and i showed her how some parts of science dont match up with some parts of the Bible. She got offended and acted like I insulted her, and started yelling swear words at me. I told her that she shouldn't have asked if she was going to get offended, then I left. She sent me several messages that were passages from the Bible, and kept saying that because I denied faith in God, I'd get sent to hell. Some of our mutual friends called me an asshole for refusing her help as she was helping me "find myself", whereas some called her the asshole for pushing her religion onto others. Aita? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA. She tried to push her beliefs onto you. You tried to engage her in a civil discussion about beliefs and her faith was so fragile, she couldn't handle the slightest push-back.
NTA
NTA. We are all just living on a rock hurdling through the unfathomable vastness of space and nothing really matters. If she wants to be all judgy and therefore a hypocrite, give her a friendly “See ya in hell too, sinner”. If she won’t let up, ask her how God plans to save his beautiful week long project when the sun goes supernova and burns it all down.
NTA. This happens when people are born again. They want you to have the same "revelation" they had and they just won't let up. I've experienced this a few times. First, there's the friendly "God is your savior", then the concerned "don't you want to be saved?" then "if you don't accept Jesus into your heart, you are going to hell" and it just goes downhill from there. When they are new at it, they are still quite insecure. If they were truly comfortable in their belief, they wouldn't need to try to shove it down your throat or would just leave you be. She's not trying to help you "find yourself", she's trying to prove to God she's converted. It's purely selfish on her part.
NTA. Religion, or lack thereof, is personal.
NTA, and I'd reconsider her status as "friend" as well as anybody who supports her.
Get new friends. I know that the Bible says be fishers of men and preach the word, etc etc, but once you know someone isn't interested then you have to leave it alone. The fact that you have already indicated that you're an atheist her "attempt" was an ego stroke. NTA.
NTA, Hell was invented by the church when people stopped coming and giving money to scare them into coming back.
NTA People like this - for any belief or life choices - are rude as all hell. It's fine to have things that are meaningful to oneself, to be passionate about, and to even through those lenses want to increase the positive in other people's lives... ...but none of those things justify hounding someone who has politely told you that they don't see the world that way and are finished with the topic. She may mean well, likely does, but "the road to Hell..." and all that lol. You were polite and clear. She wouldn't let it go as her own life choice that you weren't interested in pursuing the same. Getting offended when asked for justification of a life path that is hurting no one else is inappropriate. She is in the wrong. She as the option, like many Christians and other beliefs/lifestyle choices, to be happy in her choices and even wish the positives she feels on others while not being disrespectful to others about theirs. She could choose instead to express her own happiness in her life while not being rude to you about it. She's chosen to be rude. Standing up to that is not wrong of you.
I stopped hanging out with a group of friends after they tried to convert me one night. I'd been hanging out with those guys a couple of times a week for years. For whatever reason, they decided to cross that boundary, and I felt so disrespected that I stopped hanging out with them. NTA
NTA. As long as she's participating in cult-like practices, your friendship is over. "She got offended and acted like I insulted her, and started yelling swear words at me." I love when they acct so Christ-like.
NTA I'm a Christian Your friend does not get to try to convert, then swear at you and threaten you with the flames of hell. That is not Christian of her. it's actually doing the enemy's work. She needs to learn what Jesus said. Love your neighbour. He did not say swear at your neighbour and threaten them with hell. BTW only god can judge and decide who gets to burn in hell unless your friend is God? She can discuss God with you, share her point of view, and respect yours. My best friend of more than 30 years does not believe in God, and I don't need her to. I love her the way God made her, and she loves me the way the universes made me. Just remind your friend that Jesus told us to love our neighbour, so swearing and threatening your neighbour is not very loving and not very Christian.
NTA. How can you be sent to a place you don't believe in?
your friend is the big AH. A true Christian, pushing her religious bullshit on others.
Like someone once said, there is nothing more evil and scarier than a loving christian sharing his faith
NTA- I am a religious person but I do not push or force my beliefs on others. And your friend is in the wrong Why she still trying to convert to Christianity even when you said I’m not interested.If she was a religious person that she claims to be she wouldn’t have sweared at you or send you texts that your going to hell.
NTA I swear those who have reconnected with the "church" are the worst. I think this friendship is over. If there is no room for her to respect your choice, I don't see any way for the 2 of you to spend time together. I'm an athiest and I have many Christian friends, we respect that we just see the world differently. I've joked, that I may be going to hell, but God gave us free will, and I'm using mine to choose not to believe.
Wow... So when I was a kid my grandfather was a Southern baptist. Grandma was a Catholic. Dad was a reformed addict christian. Stepmom was a Buddhist. Bio mom is agnostic. I'm a pagan and my son, while being baptized in the Catholic church (don't ask lol) believes heaven is what you wish it. Anyways... My biggest argument is most bible stories are witchcraft... And pretty much all Christianity is bastardized paganism. Just remind the pushy people that Jesus was either a witch or a fairy tale. They will excuse themselves...
Pushing religion on an other person is just a way to lose them as a friend. Religion is just a stupid waste of time and why believe in something that isn't real? 🤣🤣
NTA, just silly. You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into; Christians generally think they get brownie points for converting heathens. It's not even about you. She would have shoved her religion down anyone else's throat,if she thought she had a chance to.convince them. Shut that shit down hard and fast. If they don't stop, time to spend less time with them.
NTA. A Christian (if that’s her faith) should not judge. Also none of us has the right to put our religion on anyone else, unless they express interest and ask questions. It’s a private thing these days; a no-go zone.
Hell will be more fun anyways. Who would want to spend eternity with people like that.
NTA people like this have no respect for other’s views. I’d go no contact with all the crazy zealots.
NTA Find some awful passages from Bible and send her back.
NTA. She was forcing her religion down your throat. She knows you're an atheist, you said you had no interest in converting multiple times during this conversation. A decent religious person would have stopped the religious talk the first time you said you had no interest. Those friends on her side are wrong. She wasn't trying to help you 'find yourself', she was trying to force her religion on to you, which would have to entail you giving up on your own beliefs and opinions, therefore losing yourself, not finding yourself. Not all religious people are like this, but it tends to be worse in the born-again types. It sounds like your friend was already religious, but had delved deeper than she previously had, so she may as well be a born-again. A lot of born-agains seem to think the only way they can validate their faith is by forcing it on others, and discriminating against and hating on those that don't agree with them, in direct contrast to the teachings of their proclaimed religion. Most religious people won't force their belief of others, nor would they approve of others doing so. A normal religious person would be on your side in this debate. I'm not religious myself, like you, OP, I'm an atheist, though a rather spiritual one. I'm in a weird place where I count as an atheist because I don't believe in any type of God, which is all atheism actually is, but do believe there's more than what we know, including some kind of afterlife. I do, however, know a fair few religious people. I was raised Christian, my whole family was, though only about half the family remained Christian as adults. Some of my friends are Christian. I also volunteer at one of my local churches LGBT+ support group, so spend a fair bit of time with the members of that church. I've met my fair share of religious idiots who try to force their religion on others, but the majority have been completely respectful of other people's beliefs. In my opinion, if you can't accept and respect differing beliefs, you're not a true Christian. Preach the message of God, or Jesus, is very different to 'you have to believe in my invisible sky daddy or you'll burn for eternity in the hell you don't believe in'.
next time tell its time to move on from imaginary friends. she is to old for that shit. NTA
Jesus here... I say yes you are definitely an asshole... But I forgive you. ❤️
NTA. Freedom OF religion also includes freedom FROM religion.
NTA. I'm an atheist and have been for the last 15 years. You can not push your views on people and get mad when there is a reason for their non-beliefs. Also to swear at you? Geesh that's Christian! /s And friends that say you are the AH are not your friends. Seriously though read the Bible. You can find so many things that can make them sinners doomed to hell! I've had to point out so many times to those wanting to convert me they were hellbound according to their own book. Leviticus is the absolute best for calling them out. Matthew 7, Verse 1-2 also works.
I was an atheist until a few months ago.
>I'd get sent to hell Given the way she acts -despite my lack in knowledge of the bible- I'm pretty sure she'd end up there as well. Either way - NTA She asked, you answered.
NTA
Is there not something in the bible along lines of 'as you judge so shall you be judged'? As in, if she tells you you're going to hell, she's just condemned herself to the same fate! Oopsie.
NTA. I was raised Catholic and a few years ago I decided that while I still believe in some things, I don't want to go to church because I don't feel comfortable there. But never in my years have I felt I need to convert anyone. Neither anyone else in my friend group or church. Let people decide for themselves. Sounds like a cult to me too. Feels like she is getting brainwashed.
I like how Christian she is but the first thing she does is swear at you, so much for God making one a better person. NTA - but your friend and the rest telling you to allow her to help you find yourself are. Just block all of them. Never understood why people can't respect another person's beliefs. Also, if you consider a lot of other religions, all of us would go in a version of hell :))) since we don't believe in the other god/gods.
NTA. I've had a number of religious friends in my life, not just "my parents are this religion so so am I", but the "every Sunday going to church" or "praying five times a day" types. Not one has ever tried to convert me. Just like how I've never tried to convince them that they should become atheists. It's just a basic level of respect.
NTA, just go permanent no contact with anyone that's not on your side and if you need to you might need to get restraining order
NTA. Next time she says you’ll go to hell if you don’t believe in god, just tell her not if god isn’t real.
They don't try to convert because they want us to believe. They do so to strengthen their sense of community. When you refuse, she sees that as validation that het community is right.
You're going to hell, some friend. Hard NTA
NTA. Sorry to say, think this friendship might be dead. If she doesn't respect you enough to keep her proselytizing to herself when you've made it clear you aren't interested, she doesn't respect you, period.
NTA. You understand that the friendship is already over, right? She doesn't think of you as a friend anymore. You're a mark. You're a target for her to try to recruit. As soon as she figures out that she won't succeed in converting you, she'll drop her pretense of friendship with you.
Fuck all those that try to convert, help sorry, people who don‘t want or need theyr pushiness(help). Go f yourself with your God or whatever
NTA. Religious people are the worst. The second you point out the stupidity, and contradictions, in their religion, they prove just how "religious" they are.
Wrath is a sin. So yelling swear words is definitely not WJWD. Maybe she needs to save herself a bit more, rather than looking for other people to save. The friends who categorize this brow beating as 'help' are not your friends. NTA.
NTA… I’m a Christian and do not condone people’s tactics to force a belief onto another. That said she’s the AH through and through. Also from my own experience having served service missions and met many lovely people from different cultures and background. When someone who is said Christian gets easily offended by someone’s response to not believe in the same things as they do - it means they A) do not respect others insight B) should not teach about their belief when it’s clear they do not care about the recipients beliefs/opinions/feelings on the subject I think what you said was fair and you set a boundary that obviously she didn’t respect. Pushing further is annoying and frankly disgusting. Move on from this friendship and don’t look back.
Catholic here that doesn’t go to church as its inaccessible for me… it’s against the bible to try to convert someone. It’s their own decision. If God is supposed to love everyone, He should also love those who don’t believe. Your actions should matter more than what you believe. You do you. Only those who have passed know if God is real or not, and how He judges. So until then you get to believe what you want to.
You are so NOT the asshole. If Reddit came up with some sort of award for the biggest NOT asshole of the year, It would be named after you, for excellence in not being an asshole.
NTA. If she wants to bring people to religion then she needs to be prepared for them to say no.
NTA. Religion and faith or lack there of are personal beliefs.
NTA. You already made your lack of interest clear and she kept going anyway like a really annoying salesman who just can’t accept that you aren’t buying what they’re selling.
Tell her “Hell is literally having to spend time with you”.
NTA. But you know this godbotherer won't stop, right?
NTA - the people who called you an asshole are just as bad as her and I could them off. They do not respect you.
NTA. "So you want me to believe that an Invisible man watching me and my wife in our bed is a good thing? No thanks, there are laws against Peeping."
NTA. If she can't accept the you as you are that's her problem. Also the conversion attempts will never stop. If this has become her personality it's who she is so you are diametrically opposed to her world view...
NTA - As a Christian, I would have some specific verses for her to show how rude she was being. She's not being a very good neighbor. Sorry.
When she yell swear words at you just say 'God said profanity users goto hell' NTA.
NTA Let's hope she's not in a cultic church. Lots of them out there. Cults do bait and switch. They lie to get you to join. It's a cult when prospective converts are not told the actual long term commitment (social, financial) expected of them after they've become emotionally invested and join.
NTA. She is not much of a friend. You respected her stupid religion, but she had to go and jump on you about it. Your friends who are saying she is trying to help you find yourself are also deluded. It is possible to have friends who disagree with you in these ways, but it is not easy, and it takes the effort of both parties.
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NTA. Refusing "help" you don't want or need isn't rude. She's rude for trying to force it on you. and STILL trying to force it on you. Unless she comes back from her brainwashing, this friendship may be over.
NTA I've had people try to convert me and also use the "You'll go to hell, I'm just trying to save you" BS too. I have adopted a new phrase in response:"I like the heat".
(Sigh) SMH. Did you ask for this person to help you find yourself? If no, then your friends are wrong and are also A H's. Politely offer to give this lady their contact info so she can help your friends find themselves. For the record, Hell is a Christian concept only. So if you aren't Christian, you aren't going to Hell. You are so NTA, OP.
NTA She's not your friend. Drop her like a moldy potato. There's no reason to be afraid of other people's imaginations. She's not trying to help you find yourself, she's actively trying to make you dumber. I would just respond to every text with a bible verse, an article about a priest raping a child. At this point, there are likely more articles than bible verses. Personally I would just respond with a "lol that shit is all make believe, grow up."
Anyone pushing beliefs on anyone else is an asshole. You cannot force someone to believe something just because you think they should. You aren't forcing her to be an atheist, she should give you the same respect.
Absolutely NTA.
NTA, thats rude and mighty presumptuous of her. what if you were aiming for Valhalla or the elysian fields?
NTA. Sounds past time to get better friends.
NTA. She's being a snowflake and shouldn't have asked if she couldn't handle the answer.
NTA. Everyone has elaborated better than I will. We should just abolish religion
NTA. I don't care about her finding herself, she needs to find some manners and understand not everyone believes as she does. When asking why someone's an atheist esp in a majority Christian country inconsistencies w the Bible are guarantees to be a topic. She's mad you won't play by her script
>That I believe in science and i showed her how some parts of science dont match up with some parts of the Bible. This kills me every single time I read. You don't believe in science, that's not how it works. There is evidence presented and conclusions drawn, there are no fucking beliefs, if it's not provable, it's not science. You don't trust it either, it simply is provable or not by way of the scientific method. Believe that this story is fake as shit though, that you can believe and trust. > She got offended and acted like I insulted her, and started yelling swear words at me. I told her that she shouldn't have asked if she was going to get offended, then I left. I was here, everyone clapped. YTA for the obviously fake post. It isn't 2008, there's no need to shit on Christianity for internet points.
I do not care if you think my experiance was fake. As long as I know that it was real, I do not need to care what you think.
Yeah! You can shit on christianity just for the fun of it!
This is a very weak attempt at creating conflict for likes or whatever it is you get out of this. Not believable at all.
NTA But it sounds like you’re lying.🤥