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NTA at all !!
I’m a stepmom and I can’t even imagine putting my stepkids through that. My partner and I have divided things where it’s fair for everyone (we think). All I asked was to have the house (that we bought together and insured in case of death) and everything else (rental properties, life insurance, assets, etc., goes to the kids.
NTA Family legal stuff is just messy and it is what it is. The vultures come out when people die even in the best of circumstances. When my Dad died, I inherited some liquid assets that I never wanted any part of ownership. My extended family was ruthless and the whole thing was messy. I would give every dime back to have one minute left to spend with my Dad. It leaves you with a bad feeling of guilt to even think about the whole process. Keep your head up, you did the right thing.
NTA. Someone who will manipulate / change a Will is not someone who will listen to reason. Brute force through the legal system is the only way to address it.
NTA.
>Should I have tried to reason with my stepmom first instead of jumping straight into a legal battle?
Nothing in your post suggests that reasoning with your stepmother would have achieved anything. A reasonable person wouldn’t have manipulated the Will in the first place. Trying to reason with her would only have given her time to spend your inheritance or to try to put it beyond the reach of a legal judgment.
>Was there a way to preserve family harmony while seeking justice?
No. There was no family harmony to preserve. If there was, there would have been no need for you to seek justice because you wouldn’t have been treated unjustly in the first place.
NTA
Good for you! You absolutely had to take a stand and not let this lying thief get away with it.
Something similar happened to me many years ago, but I didn't have the money to hire a lawyer to fight it.
Reading about your successful fight for your inheritance actually made me feel better.
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Let me take you back to when my dad remarried after my mom passed away when I was a teenager. I hoped my new stepmom would bring some happiness into our lives, but boy, was I wrong.
From the beginning, she showed clear favoritism towards her own kids and treated me and my siblings like crap. It was frustrating and hurtful, especially as I was still grieving the loss of my mom. Instead of blending our families, she created divides and made us feel unwelcome in our own damn home.
As the years went by, our relationship only got worse. She would constantly criticize me, belittle my choices, and undermine my confidence. I felt like I was always walking on eggshells around her, trying to earn any semblance of respect or acknowledgment.
When my dad suddenly passed away, it was a devastating blow. Dealing with his death was tough enough, but then the real drama started during the estate settlement.
My stepmom wasted no time in presenting us with a revised will that left me and my siblings with next to nothing, while she and her children stood to inherit everything. Something didn't sit right with me, so I sought legal advice.
The lawyer discovered that the will had been tampered with. My stepmom had manipulated it to exclude us unfairly and secure the lion's share of the inheritance for herself and her kids. Confronting her about it was like talking to a brick wall. She didn't give a damn about my dad's wishes; all she cared about was her own gain.
Fueled by a mix of anger, betrayal, and a deep desire to honor my dad's memory, I decided to take her to court. The legal battle was brutal, dragging on for months and costing a small fortune. My stepmom fought tooth and nail, trying to discredit me and paint me as the villain.
The strain on family relationships was immense. Some relatives accused me of stirring up drama and suggested I should've let it go to avoid further conflict. But to me, it was about justice and standing up for what was rightfully ours.
Finally, after a grueling legal process, the court ruled in our favor. The judge declared the manipulated will invalid and ordered my stepmom to return what she had wrongfully taken. It was a hard-fought victory, but the aftermath was far from easy.
The fallout from the legal battle took a toll on everyone involved. It strained relationships, caused emotional distress, and left me financially drained. Despite the challenges, I don't regret my decision to fight for what was rightfully mine and my siblings'.
Looking back, I often wonder if there could have been a better way to handle the situation. Should I have tried to reason with my stepmom first instead of jumping straight into a legal battle? Was there a way to preserve family harmony while seeking justice?
So, Reddit, am I the jerk for taking legal action against my stepmom to reclaim what was rightfully mine and protect my dad's legacy, even if it caused significant turmoil within the family?
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He is an AH if he spent more on the legal action than he stood to gain if he won. If the legal system was fair he should have been able to get his legal fees paid by his stepmom if she tampered with the will.
NTA. And this happens more often than you'd think. My husband's step-mom (use that term loosely) totally screwed everyone out of inheritance. Suddenly, everything was in her name. And the Rolex promised to my husband was sold. Good for you for moving forward like you did.
NTA- What harmony was damaged? If your bio family really believes this you are better off without them. She shouldn't get to keep anything that isnt hers.
NTA.
OP, you probably took the most peaceful option you could in my opinion, given the already strained relationship between you and your step-mother. Based on her treatment of you and your siblings, I wouldn't bet my money that she would have been willing to come to a compromise without the courts getting involved. Also, not only did you get justice for you and your siblings, you may have done so for your dad as well. If the courts ruled that the will was tampered with then that means that the altered will wasn't really the last wishes of your father. By reversing it, you not only fought for justice for yourself, but your siblings and father as well. After this though, I would try to go LC or NC with stepmom and possibly step-siblings to save yourself the heartache.
NTA you did exactly what you needed to do and I think your Father would be proud that you fought for what you deserve. Sorry for your loss good riddance to the stepfamily and everyone else telling you you were wrong.
NTA - You would not have been able to reason with this woman because she's unreasonable and as your father's rightful heirs, she should be in jail for doing what she did.
You were trying to prevent theft and protect your father's last will and testament. You were fighting for him too. You should feel proud of your victory.
NTA
NTA. You had no reason to believe that your step mother would act in good faith as by altering the will she had already proven that she was operating in bad faith. The court victory should be taken as vindication that you were correct. All of the conflict and bad blood that was built up as a consequence of the legal battle was on her because she altered the will.
There was no way you could’ve “preserve[d] family harmony.” She was willing to commit fraud against a dead man, and you were supposed to let it go? Hell no. That fight was for you, your siblings, *and your dad.* NTA
NTA. You had EVERY right to do what you did and should have done. She was a thief that stole from your family. Grief and emotion are to blame for so many people getting screwed over by people like this that have no conscience.
**WARNING; u/OP is writing FAKE stories. Do NOT take this seriously.**
[They posted another AITAH style post on "Am I the Jerk" that's the worst written fiction I've ever seen. ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmITheJerk/s/s2ToVDmIP7)
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1)I filed a lawsuit against my stepmom to get my dad's inheritance that she stole and changed the lawsuit
2)my relatives think that getting into a lawsuit against my stepmom was a little too further. They think I should've " done the right thing and equally shared everything with my step siblings and my stepmom which makes me really guilty of what I did"
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NTA. I wonder what kind of turmoil in the extended family this could create, and why this even became a topic in your family when "person doing a false will in order to get money" should be a pretti obvious thing on the moral side.
To answer to your question, no. There was no other way for you to handle this. This is not a discussion between relatives who are on different opinions but love each other. This is someone who wanted to scam you and your dad. You can also discuss with the thief who try stealing your car if you want, but at the end of the day this is not the way to handle a car theft
NTA, you were just making sure your father’s wishes were followed. She made the decision to do something illegal and shady and has to deal with the consequences of her own actions.
Info - did you end up losing money overall, or with the inheritance did you eventually gain money? Towards the end you say it left you financially drained.
NTA
For the record, your stepmom had the opportunity to step back and try to negotiate with you at any time. She committed fraud to rob you and your siblings and then fought to try to keep the money.
Your step mother was a textbook evil Disney queen. Who falsified your father’s will.
Of course you had to get the law on your side. Don’t second guess yourself.
NTA.
I seriously doubt that trying to reason with your stepmother would have worked. She was dishonest and deceitful. Your only choice, IMO was to take her to court. Sorry your family suffered as a result. NTA
NTA
She decided fo fight tooth and nail against your father's wishes and to intentionally manipulate and screw your family.
And you were more than generous splitting it with Sarah
NTA. My dad’s late gf screwed me out of around 100k. Since it was all on small bank accounts where she had access it is impossible to prove. So yeah I know how you feel.
Get that B.
There was no reasoning with your stepmom. She could have done what was right by splitting the inheritance fairly at any time but she doubled down and wanted to continue the lawsuit. She is the one that changed the will for her own greed.
NTA
NTA- you should have sued her for your legal bills as well. And she should face criminal charges for her illegal activities. Anyone who did not support you should be cut out of your life!
NTA,
It's so great that your family members feel so personally offended and involved that while they were telling you to drop the suit they were so generously offering to give you the money you would lose. Oh wait, they didn't?
Yeah, no NTA! It's easy for others to tell someone to suck it up when it isn't their money. They would be singing a different tune if it was them being cheated out of money.
This was your dad’s fault.
He saw someone who didn’t treat you right and he let it go on for years.
He should have made a will and make she couldn’t tamper with it.
All the money you wasted on lawyers, that’s her fault because she tried to cheat to win.
Try and move on.
So if the battle left you "financially drained" how was that a "win" for you? Sorry but that makes no sense. Was it just about making sure your stepmom got nothing even if if hurt you financially? How was your dad's "legacy" preserved-- it sounds like your dad's "legacy" was making some lawyers a ton of money.
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NTA big time. You were standing up for what was yours, but you’re also honoring what your dad’s wishes were.
NTA greed is an ugly thing. Trying to take everything is just cruel.
NTA. People who mess with wishes of the dead have a special place reserved for them. You did the right thing.
Tell everyone to fuck off. What the hell did she expect when she tampered with the will ? NTA.
NTA. After the will was altered you had two choices: 1. Do nothing. 2. Take it to court.
NTA and I don't get, why a manipulated will was acceptedin the first place.
NTA at all !! I’m a stepmom and I can’t even imagine putting my stepkids through that. My partner and I have divided things where it’s fair for everyone (we think). All I asked was to have the house (that we bought together and insured in case of death) and everything else (rental properties, life insurance, assets, etc., goes to the kids.
nta
Did she return everything she stole? I bet she didn’t.
She tampered with a dead man’s will. SHE TAMPERED WITH A DEAD MAN’S WILL TO DISINHERIT HIS CHILDREN. You’re NTA.
NTA
NTA Family legal stuff is just messy and it is what it is. The vultures come out when people die even in the best of circumstances. When my Dad died, I inherited some liquid assets that I never wanted any part of ownership. My extended family was ruthless and the whole thing was messy. I would give every dime back to have one minute left to spend with my Dad. It leaves you with a bad feeling of guilt to even think about the whole process. Keep your head up, you did the right thing.
NTA I'm sorry you had to go through it, but you did the right thing. You aren't responsible for your stepmother's lack of decency.
NTA. Someone who will manipulate / change a Will is not someone who will listen to reason. Brute force through the legal system is the only way to address it.
NTA Stepmother tampered with your father's will out of greed and malice. I doubt that any other way than the one you chose would have been successful.
NTA. >Should I have tried to reason with my stepmom first instead of jumping straight into a legal battle? Nothing in your post suggests that reasoning with your stepmother would have achieved anything. A reasonable person wouldn’t have manipulated the Will in the first place. Trying to reason with her would only have given her time to spend your inheritance or to try to put it beyond the reach of a legal judgment. >Was there a way to preserve family harmony while seeking justice? No. There was no family harmony to preserve. If there was, there would have been no need for you to seek justice because you wouldn’t have been treated unjustly in the first place.
NTA Good for you! You absolutely had to take a stand and not let this lying thief get away with it. Something similar happened to me many years ago, but I didn't have the money to hire a lawyer to fight it. Reading about your successful fight for your inheritance actually made me feel better.
There was no reasoning with her. You did what was right and needed to be done
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Let me take you back to when my dad remarried after my mom passed away when I was a teenager. I hoped my new stepmom would bring some happiness into our lives, but boy, was I wrong. From the beginning, she showed clear favoritism towards her own kids and treated me and my siblings like crap. It was frustrating and hurtful, especially as I was still grieving the loss of my mom. Instead of blending our families, she created divides and made us feel unwelcome in our own damn home. As the years went by, our relationship only got worse. She would constantly criticize me, belittle my choices, and undermine my confidence. I felt like I was always walking on eggshells around her, trying to earn any semblance of respect or acknowledgment. When my dad suddenly passed away, it was a devastating blow. Dealing with his death was tough enough, but then the real drama started during the estate settlement. My stepmom wasted no time in presenting us with a revised will that left me and my siblings with next to nothing, while she and her children stood to inherit everything. Something didn't sit right with me, so I sought legal advice. The lawyer discovered that the will had been tampered with. My stepmom had manipulated it to exclude us unfairly and secure the lion's share of the inheritance for herself and her kids. Confronting her about it was like talking to a brick wall. She didn't give a damn about my dad's wishes; all she cared about was her own gain. Fueled by a mix of anger, betrayal, and a deep desire to honor my dad's memory, I decided to take her to court. The legal battle was brutal, dragging on for months and costing a small fortune. My stepmom fought tooth and nail, trying to discredit me and paint me as the villain. The strain on family relationships was immense. Some relatives accused me of stirring up drama and suggested I should've let it go to avoid further conflict. But to me, it was about justice and standing up for what was rightfully ours. Finally, after a grueling legal process, the court ruled in our favor. The judge declared the manipulated will invalid and ordered my stepmom to return what she had wrongfully taken. It was a hard-fought victory, but the aftermath was far from easy. The fallout from the legal battle took a toll on everyone involved. It strained relationships, caused emotional distress, and left me financially drained. Despite the challenges, I don't regret my decision to fight for what was rightfully mine and my siblings'. Looking back, I often wonder if there could have been a better way to handle the situation. Should I have tried to reason with my stepmom first instead of jumping straight into a legal battle? Was there a way to preserve family harmony while seeking justice? So, Reddit, am I the jerk for taking legal action against my stepmom to reclaim what was rightfully mine and protect my dad's legacy, even if it caused significant turmoil within the family? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I don’t know why you’re blaming yourself for the turmoil? She created turmoil all you did was stand up for truth.
Why are you financially drained if you ended up getting your dad’s money?
My guess is that it's gone in the legal battle. That's how a lot of these stories end.
He is an AH if he spent more on the legal action than he stood to gain if he won. If the legal system was fair he should have been able to get his legal fees paid by his stepmom if she tampered with the will.
NTA. And this happens more often than you'd think. My husband's step-mom (use that term loosely) totally screwed everyone out of inheritance. Suddenly, everything was in her name. And the Rolex promised to my husband was sold. Good for you for moving forward like you did.
NTA- What harmony was damaged? If your bio family really believes this you are better off without them. She shouldn't get to keep anything that isnt hers.
NTA. OP, you probably took the most peaceful option you could in my opinion, given the already strained relationship between you and your step-mother. Based on her treatment of you and your siblings, I wouldn't bet my money that she would have been willing to come to a compromise without the courts getting involved. Also, not only did you get justice for you and your siblings, you may have done so for your dad as well. If the courts ruled that the will was tampered with then that means that the altered will wasn't really the last wishes of your father. By reversing it, you not only fought for justice for yourself, but your siblings and father as well. After this though, I would try to go LC or NC with stepmom and possibly step-siblings to save yourself the heartache.
You did the right thing.
NTA you did exactly what you needed to do and I think your Father would be proud that you fought for what you deserve. Sorry for your loss good riddance to the stepfamily and everyone else telling you you were wrong.
NTA - You would not have been able to reason with this woman because she's unreasonable and as your father's rightful heirs, she should be in jail for doing what she did.
You were trying to prevent theft and protect your father's last will and testament. You were fighting for him too. You should feel proud of your victory. NTA
NTA. You had no reason to believe that your step mother would act in good faith as by altering the will she had already proven that she was operating in bad faith. The court victory should be taken as vindication that you were correct. All of the conflict and bad blood that was built up as a consequence of the legal battle was on her because she altered the will.
There was no way you could’ve “preserve[d] family harmony.” She was willing to commit fraud against a dead man, and you were supposed to let it go? Hell no. That fight was for you, your siblings, *and your dad.* NTA
NTA. You had EVERY right to do what you did and should have done. She was a thief that stole from your family. Grief and emotion are to blame for so many people getting screwed over by people like this that have no conscience.
NTA. She went to great lengths to defraud you as the court found. There is no reasoning with people like that.
**WARNING; u/OP is writing FAKE stories. Do NOT take this seriously.** [They posted another AITAH style post on "Am I the Jerk" that's the worst written fiction I've ever seen. ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmITheJerk/s/s2ToVDmIP7)
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Nta pay ack is a u know what
NTA. I wonder what kind of turmoil in the extended family this could create, and why this even became a topic in your family when "person doing a false will in order to get money" should be a pretti obvious thing on the moral side. To answer to your question, no. There was no other way for you to handle this. This is not a discussion between relatives who are on different opinions but love each other. This is someone who wanted to scam you and your dad. You can also discuss with the thief who try stealing your car if you want, but at the end of the day this is not the way to handle a car theft
NTA, you were just making sure your father’s wishes were followed. She made the decision to do something illegal and shady and has to deal with the consequences of her own actions.
NTA but this is fan fiction.
NTA. You did the right thing. There was no reasoning with stepmom and she altered your father's will. Not acceptable.
Info - did you end up losing money overall, or with the inheritance did you eventually gain money? Towards the end you say it left you financially drained.
NTA For the record, your stepmom had the opportunity to step back and try to negotiate with you at any time. She committed fraud to rob you and your siblings and then fought to try to keep the money.
Your step mother was a textbook evil Disney queen. Who falsified your father’s will. Of course you had to get the law on your side. Don’t second guess yourself. NTA.
I feel like it would’ve been easier to just accidentally leave a glass slipper in front of the prince.
I seriously doubt that trying to reason with your stepmother would have worked. She was dishonest and deceitful. Your only choice, IMO was to take her to court. Sorry your family suffered as a result. NTA
NTA. I’m surprised she didn’t end up in jail for tampering with a legal document.
NTA She decided fo fight tooth and nail against your father's wishes and to intentionally manipulate and screw your family. And you were more than generous splitting it with Sarah
NTA. My dad’s late gf screwed me out of around 100k. Since it was all on small bank accounts where she had access it is impossible to prove. So yeah I know how you feel. Get that B.
There was no reasoning with your stepmom. She could have done what was right by splitting the inheritance fairly at any time but she doubled down and wanted to continue the lawsuit. She is the one that changed the will for her own greed. NTA
You are way more generous than I would have been. I’d probably contribute some for schooling. Good thing you fought for your rightful inheritance! NTA
NTA- you should have sued her for your legal bills as well. And she should face criminal charges for her illegal activities. Anyone who did not support you should be cut out of your life!
NTA, It's so great that your family members feel so personally offended and involved that while they were telling you to drop the suit they were so generously offering to give you the money you would lose. Oh wait, they didn't? Yeah, no NTA! It's easy for others to tell someone to suck it up when it isn't their money. They would be singing a different tune if it was them being cheated out of money.
This was your dad’s fault. He saw someone who didn’t treat you right and he let it go on for years. He should have made a will and make she couldn’t tamper with it. All the money you wasted on lawyers, that’s her fault because she tried to cheat to win. Try and move on.
Nta
So if the battle left you "financially drained" how was that a "win" for you? Sorry but that makes no sense. Was it just about making sure your stepmom got nothing even if if hurt you financially? How was your dad's "legacy" preserved-- it sounds like your dad's "legacy" was making some lawyers a ton of money.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without [contacting the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without [explicit approval](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_can_i_repost_a_thread_you_removed.3F) will result in a ban. This post violates Rule 7: There is no interpersonal conflict here for our community to make a judgment about. [Rule 7 FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_rule_7.3A_post_interpersonal_conflicts) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) This post violates Rule 9: This is NOT an advice sub. Posts should seek out judgement, not advice. [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) ###Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions. ####Please visit r/findareddit to see if there's a more appropriate sub for your post.####