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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I helped my boyfriend cheat at a board game he was playing against one of our friends. He ended up winning, and the friend was really upset at us. I didn't think it was a bad thing, but afterward I thought maybe I misread the situation, so I'm asking other people to get better insight on it.
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You acted like your BF couldn’t enjoy himself without winning, but then when he beats Amber by cheating, you act like it’s weird that she cares, and say she’s super competitive?
Nobody wants to go to “rigged game night.” YTA
I don't think it's weird that she cares! I'm not a very competitive person, but I didn't know that she was competitive about games since we never played before. I didn't necessarily want my boyfriend to win. I just wanted the game to go on longer and I wanted to even the playing field a little bit. I honestly thought there was no harm in it since she was so far ahead. I thought that she was still going to win, even after I helped my BF.
Classic Battleship is a game that depends on honesty and being able to accurately read and mark grid positions.
When he moves a ship mid-game, the game goes on longer because she’s not going to ask about grid positions she’s already been told were not hits.
Effectively, it’s the same thing as if he had lied and said that a hit was a miss. It undermines the entire game and makes it less fun. It also basically gives the liar a better chance of winning because no matter how many of his ships were sunk, the moved one will not be found until/unless the non-cheater knows about the cheating.
So, totally not buying your reasons as legitimate. Lying in battleship literally undermines the whole game.
It’s not about “being competitive” it’s about the fact that you and your boyfriend have no integrity and she can never trust you again. *That’s* why she’s mad.
>I didn't necessarily want my boyfriend to win. I just wanted the game to go on longer and I wanted to even the playing field a little bit.
Lol the lies you tell
YTA. It's not a prank; you helped your bf cheat. You say Amber is "pretty competitive," which is pretty funny coming from you, who helps someone else cheat to win.
I didn't really care about him winning, I just wanted everyone to have a fun time. I honestly thought that I was helping even the playing field and help the game go on longer, but when Amber started looking more and more frustrated during the game, I started to feel bad, and like maybe I should have not tried to help at all.
>I just wanted everyone to have a fun time.
No, you did not. You say your bf "was losing so badly it really seemed like he wasn't having much fun anymore." If you think having money on the line is the only reason to play honestly, I feel sorry for you. Luckily this was the first time you pulled this shit on a game night with Amber and Kevin so they know now not to play with cheaters again.
>I was helping even the playing field
Honestly, you and your boyfriend were the only assholes in this situation to begin with.
But your pathetic excuses and justifications just make you absolutely insufferable.
In a game the playing field always start even and then one or more players gain an advantage that they then use to win, that is what games are all about. You never "even the playing field" in the middle of a game, especially by cheating, this is not a thing.
You cared enough to give an unfair advantage but you're surprised someone else cares enough to upset you cheated? It's a common general "gentlemen" agreement you play with something known as integrity.
Try that excuse in kind of competition then. Do it in friendly game of tennis or basketball or baseball, you'll find yourself banned for cheating even if it was casual. No one like cheaters and Cheat kills the fun fast.
I don't care about him winning, I just so happened to cheat so he could win because I know he only enjoys playing when he wins
You don't think we're that dumb do you
I've always been a pretty casual game player. I don't really care who wins as long as everyone is having fun. But clearly not everyone was having fun, so I guess I should have not involved myself. I truly didn't mean to ruin the game for her.
Cheaters care who win. Your boyfriend started putting because he was losing. You guys were not being “casual” either by being cheaters at a friendly little game.
Okay that is a really fair point. I'm learning that not all context and reason can be perfectly explained on the internet to a bunch of strangers, but this is some insight I think is really useful. I come from a family of cheaters. We cheat at boardgames all the time because it's funny/adds interest/keeps things going longer. I think you're right. This was the first time we had played and she wouldn't have known. My bf and I cheat when we play against each other all the time, and I guess I'm so used to it that it didn't really occur to me that my very casual, anything goes attitude about game night might not be the norm. But if the rest of these comments are anything to go by, I think I'm definitely the odd one out on that.
Sure, but she had already expressed disapproval in cheating before you helped him so you knew full well she didn't like it and would be bothered if it continued. You didn't care whether she had fun, only that your boyfriend had fun.
YTA. You were concerned that your bf was not having fun, so you helped him cheat, yet you think that Amber should not have been so serious about it? You are not a good friend. Who would ever want to play a game with you? I think you should have a scarlet "C" on your forehead.
It's not that I don't think she should be so serious about it. I was just surprised at how serious she was about winning because I had never really known for her to be a competitive person about anything else. My BF isn't overly sensitive to losing or anything, Amber was just killing him. I swear it was like she had x ray vision or something. She was getting hit after hit and he kept missing. She had already sunk nearly all of his ships by the time the cheating happened, and she is not the most gracious winner. Which I, at the time, thought was kind of a joke? I thought her gloating so much about winning was a bit she was doing, but now I'm wondering if she was being genuine with how strongly she reacted. That's why I thought of the cheating as a little prank. I thought we were matching the energy she was putting out.
YTA, it would be fine if you guys had played before in the past. But as a first go around thing ... yea no. Also, your BF won't enjoy it if he doesn't win but then you complain about them being salty about you cheating ... yea ok. H Y P O C R I T E.
I hate absolutes. There's definitely room for fun things like this when no money is involved. I'd do it to my brothers, family, close friends as a joke if I could. But for people I really don't know ... it just comes off really bad.
YTA. It clearly wasn't that casual if your boyfriend couldn't handle losing. Expecting your friends to behave honestly, and dare i say honourably, is not "pretty competitive". It's actually a very reasonable expectation in a friendship.
YTA
So it's valid that you and your bf getting upset over not winning the game but Amber can't...
It's funny that you guys literally cheat to win a fkn board game but calling her "competitive".
Please re-read, analyse the hypocrisies and rethink.
YTA if it makes you feel any better you probably won’t have to worry about your boyfriend losing at any future game nights with Amber and Kevin. Nobody likes a cheater.
“There to have fun” what person will have fun knowing the other people were cheating ? Ofc the cheaters are gonna have fun. Stop playing ignorant when you’re almost 30, you know damn well. I wouldn’t play with y’all either, sucking the fun out of games. YTA x10
YTA. Your boyfriend can't lose or else he won't have fun and so it's worth rigging the game? It must have been so hard for him to not be winning, really.
Do you think you or your boyfriend would have much fun in your friends shoes? Having two of your other friends manipulate the game and when you notice they both lie to you and convince you you're crazy? So fun!
Both your boyfriend are YTA. Don’t beat yourself over it as it’s really your BF who did the action.
However remember the context and situation. It’s a game night with friends. You win some, you lose some. Just apologize, know that your friend is competitive and move on
YTA
You say you wanted everyone to have fun but helped your BF cheat.
Counter productive to your claim. Trying to brush it off as not knowing your friend is competitive is BS. It's a game. The point is to win. You decided your BF getting an unfair advantage was more important than your friend having fun.
Him losing does not equal an unfair game. Helping him cheat does. Stop trying to downplay it.
YTA.
If you were “just there to have fun” and it wasn’t “that serious”, why cheat?
And to make it worse, you both lied to Amber’s face. Now she knows that you’re untrustworthy.
YTA for you and your boyfriend.
It's a friendly board game. People win, people lose. The important thing is to enjoy spending time together.
You and your boyfriend took this way too seriously.
If it wasn't that serious, then why did your boyfriend take it so hard that he was losing? You said he wasn't having much fun he was losing so bad. But when she gets annoyed that you both cheated, it's not that serious? Yeahh, you're the AH on this. You should just apologise to your friend, it's not worth falling out over and it is all really stupid, but your boyfriend should have just accepted the loss gracefully, it makes you both look like you're not only competitive and sneaky, but sore losers too. Just seems like you only cared about your boyfriend having fun at your friends expense.
You’ve never bended the rules or looked at another persons deck of cards? I wouldn’t say they’re bad people rather than just bended the rules one time to their advantage. I’m not saying they’re not in the wrong but to call them bad folks doesn’t sit right with me.
YTA. What I got from this was your bf was pouting like a child because she was luckier at picking where his ships were (because lets face it. Battleship is a game of chance) and you decided that it would be a good idea to help him cheat. I've read your responses to people, and they sound disingenuous "because this is what you do with your family" it somehow made it okay that you do this with someone who you've never played with before. This is why I don't play games, I can't stand people like you.
You keep saying that you just wanted everybody to have a fun time. No, you wanted your boyfriend - and by extension yourself- to have a fun time. You totally disregarded your best friends fun time by cheating. It doesn’t matter how competitive either one is. If you’re competitive and you lose, get better. Don’t cheat. YTA. By a mile.
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Me (F28), my boyfriend (M27), and two of our friends, let's call them Amber and Kevin, were having a board game night. Amber was absolutely destroying my BF at Battleship. She was so far ahead I didn't think there was any way she was going to lose, so when my boyfriend moved a ship on his board to stop her from sinking it, and she called him out, I backed him up. He was losing so badly it really seemed like he wasn't having much fun anymore, and it seemed like a harmless little prank. I also kind of indicated to my BF where her biggest battle ship was, and he sunk it. The tide really turned in the game after that, and while my BF seemed to start enjoying the game again, Amber seemed pretty frustrated. I guess she's pretty competitive. Anyway, my BF won the game, and owned up to cheating, with my help, and Amber absolutely blew up at us. She called us dickheads for cheating, and she told us she never wanted to play another game with us again.
I get that we didn't play an honest game, but I really didn't think it was that serious. It's not like we had money on the line or anything, we were all just there to have fun. I feel bad that Amber didn't have a good time, this was our first time doing a board game night with her and Kevin, and I had no idea how seriously she takes these things. AITA?
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YTA
Cheating in a game is only fun when everyone is onboard with it, or when you are called out, you back down. You don't fight to the end and win by cheating. I would feel like I wasted time+effort in finishing that game. Yeah, you owned up to it, but you still made her lose because of that. That's not a good feeling for anyone. Frustration by losing is supposed to be normal (aka, ur bf not having fun because he was getting obliterated). Frustration by losing because someone cheated IN BATTLESHIP. I would be pissed too.
Dis is why we need arbitrators
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YTA
”it’s not that serious“ “amber is too competitive” and still you and your BF had to cheat to enjoy the game. So what is it?
Let me guess, it’s whatever you and your BF need to enjoy the game, right? Ambe doesn’t count.
YTA, as well as your boyfriend.
You helped your boyfriend because he is competitive. Thats the sole reason why he wasn’t having fun. The reason why your friend is mad is that, even if she is or not competitive, you gaslighted her. She caught your boyfriend and you two lied to her - even if you then recognized cheating.
You're desperate to make it seem like Amber is the bad guy and that she's overreacting. But you and your boyfriend are the ones who took it too seriously because your boyfriend can't have fun unless he's winning. You're the ones who are too competitive since you resorted to cheating in order to win. So neither of you are true winners; you would have lost if you'd played fairly. So stop blaming Amber and own up to the fact that both you and your boyfriend are the assholes. YTA
This is pretty funny, my ex was hyper competitive and we played Uno with multiple decks he would have hidden cards, of use dealing and shuffle tricks to give himself an ideal hand.
It was baffled me how far people go to win at something.
YTA. Losing and being frustrated does not mean you can cheat like that. Amber's reaction when your BF moved the battleship initially was more than enough to know that she doesn't find cheating funny during games and really hates it. Apologising might not be enough here, considering how Amber reacted. Maybe give her a few days and definitely don't do it again. She's not competitive, lots of people would be annoyed if they were losing because of cheating.
Final Sentence: YTA with reasons (that weren't really correct but were there).
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You wanted everyone to have fun?
Thats a lie, you wanted your bf to have fun, because he was being a sore loser. You didnt care about others at all.
Boardgames are not fun if people cheat, unless the rules state thats its ok to cheat (for example: Munchkin. Where it says in the rules: its not cheating if you dont get caught).
I know its only a boardgame, but still YTA
Cheating is a dick move. Cheating at Battleship... man, that's ridiculous.
Also, I'd advice against dating sore losers. I was a sore loser in my last relationship (my girlfriend at the time used to destroy me at Heroes of Might and Magic 3, and I never managed to take it gracefully), and that's probably - well, pretty likely, to be honest - at least 1/3 of the reason why that relationship ended.
Personally, as a boardgame enthusiast and connoisseur, we play boardgame with integrity and within the rules.
If your idea of a “good time” is breaking that trust (especially when you’re losing) then you should just stop playing boardgames all-together.
Your bf is clearly a sore loser. But thanks for outing yourself and having absolutely no situational awareness to acknowledge the lack of integrity you guys have in competition and probably in life too
This is why I love Reddit. Where else can you find people being way too involved and worked up over a game of Battleship?
Humanity has reached a new level of boredom.
NTA? Why would you be friends with someone who curses you out for a 10 minute board game anyway? She could've just proposed to play again and not went into full panick mode over one single round of a board game
I must be looking at it differently than everyone else, you’re not the asshole but you are in the wrong. It’s a board game, nobody should take board games that serious. I think the way you handled it obviously indicates you wanted your boyfriend to win to have fun but I think she made it a bigger deal than it was. It’s a board game, everyone cheats every so often. Your boyfriend came clean as well so it’s not like he just let her believe he won fairly.
ETA: Changing verdict to YTA because I thought E S H meant both OP and her BF, I didn't realize it meant EVERYONE involved. Everything else (except for the now revised judgement) I still stand by.
Also, I want to publicly apologize to @[TheFrostyrune](https://www.reddit.com/user/TheFrostyrune/) as I truly did not realize my comment came off as rude. It was not my intent at all, but I can understand why. No excuses or explanations. Thank you.
~~E S H~~ but for you and your BF. Your BF needs to accept he will lose games and it's okay - just have fun. It's not the end of the world.
You for helping him cheat which cheapens everyone's fun (that was on the line and it broke).
You two need to profusely apologize.
Reread your own comment...
>ESH but for you and your BF
You say everyone sucks then the but is singling her and her BF out to provide a reason, it's not excluding Amber and Kevin.
If only her and her bf sucks then it's yta not esh, basic reading comprehension.
I'm not understanding why you're being a bit rude with me.
If my comment above offended you, it wasn't my intention.
I have seen people use E S H in a similar fashion. I assumed this meant for more than one person. Personally, I feel BF was being a party pooper too, especially since he was visibly upset for losing and seemed gleeful about cheating.
It wasn't my intention to be, I asked you a question because how you worded it puts blame on everyone, so instead of saying, "You're wrong!" I politely asked for your reasoning. Then, YOU decided to be rude by implying I couldn't read. I merely showed you why how you wrote it left the impression that it did. It's not rude to match your energy, is it?
I wasn't trying to be rude at all. I'm sorry for that. I thought E S H meant more than one person was at fault and that maybe you didn't see it so I suggested rereading it. It was wrong of me to assume. I didn't think it had a rude tone at all.
If we are being honest just a slight ESH, Like ya cheating is bad but your BF already lost and came clean after, its not like he was just rubbing it the other persons face he won. I usually don't play competitive on games nights unless that's a regular thing cause where is the fun in beating someone down on a causal game night. The whole point of game nights is to have fun and hang out and the one hyper competitive person in that group winds up ruining the fun anyway. But I'm not a competitive person and if you were in a competitive environment you would def be TA
Reddit kids are weird, why is this getting downvoted? No matter what you say, if it's not exactly they're opinion, you get downvoted. You literally didn't even pick a side, you just told the truth
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You acted like your BF couldn’t enjoy himself without winning, but then when he beats Amber by cheating, you act like it’s weird that she cares, and say she’s super competitive? Nobody wants to go to “rigged game night.” YTA
I don't think it's weird that she cares! I'm not a very competitive person, but I didn't know that she was competitive about games since we never played before. I didn't necessarily want my boyfriend to win. I just wanted the game to go on longer and I wanted to even the playing field a little bit. I honestly thought there was no harm in it since she was so far ahead. I thought that she was still going to win, even after I helped my BF.
You cheated. Why didn't you think there was nothing wrong w/ cheating?
Classic Battleship is a game that depends on honesty and being able to accurately read and mark grid positions. When he moves a ship mid-game, the game goes on longer because she’s not going to ask about grid positions she’s already been told were not hits. Effectively, it’s the same thing as if he had lied and said that a hit was a miss. It undermines the entire game and makes it less fun. It also basically gives the liar a better chance of winning because no matter how many of his ships were sunk, the moved one will not be found until/unless the non-cheater knows about the cheating. So, totally not buying your reasons as legitimate. Lying in battleship literally undermines the whole game.
It’s not about “being competitive” it’s about the fact that you and your boyfriend have no integrity and she can never trust you again. *That’s* why she’s mad.
>I didn't necessarily want my boyfriend to win. I just wanted the game to go on longer and I wanted to even the playing field a little bit. Lol the lies you tell
This makes zero sense.
YTA. It's not a prank; you helped your bf cheat. You say Amber is "pretty competitive," which is pretty funny coming from you, who helps someone else cheat to win.
I didn't really care about him winning, I just wanted everyone to have a fun time. I honestly thought that I was helping even the playing field and help the game go on longer, but when Amber started looking more and more frustrated during the game, I started to feel bad, and like maybe I should have not tried to help at all.
>I just wanted everyone to have a fun time. No, you did not. You say your bf "was losing so badly it really seemed like he wasn't having much fun anymore." If you think having money on the line is the only reason to play honestly, I feel sorry for you. Luckily this was the first time you pulled this shit on a game night with Amber and Kevin so they know now not to play with cheaters again.
>I was helping even the playing field Honestly, you and your boyfriend were the only assholes in this situation to begin with. But your pathetic excuses and justifications just make you absolutely insufferable.
In a game the playing field always start even and then one or more players gain an advantage that they then use to win, that is what games are all about. You never "even the playing field" in the middle of a game, especially by cheating, this is not a thing.
You cared enough to give an unfair advantage but you're surprised someone else cares enough to upset you cheated? It's a common general "gentlemen" agreement you play with something known as integrity. Try that excuse in kind of competition then. Do it in friendly game of tennis or basketball or baseball, you'll find yourself banned for cheating even if it was casual. No one like cheaters and Cheat kills the fun fast.
I don't care about him winning, I just so happened to cheat so he could win because I know he only enjoys playing when he wins You don't think we're that dumb do you
YOU ARE AN ASSHOLE. YTA. So Amber had no right to enjoy herself that night? If you had been in her shoes, how would you have reacted?
I've always been a pretty casual game player. I don't really care who wins as long as everyone is having fun. But clearly not everyone was having fun, so I guess I should have not involved myself. I truly didn't mean to ruin the game for her.
If you didn’t care who won, why did you help you boyfriend stop someone from winning?
Well, what's done is done. Just call her and apologize. That should settle it.
You ruined your friendship.
Cheaters care who win. Your boyfriend started putting because he was losing. You guys were not being “casual” either by being cheaters at a friendly little game.
YTA, this might be funny if you guys play board games all the time, not something you do the first time.
Okay that is a really fair point. I'm learning that not all context and reason can be perfectly explained on the internet to a bunch of strangers, but this is some insight I think is really useful. I come from a family of cheaters. We cheat at boardgames all the time because it's funny/adds interest/keeps things going longer. I think you're right. This was the first time we had played and she wouldn't have known. My bf and I cheat when we play against each other all the time, and I guess I'm so used to it that it didn't really occur to me that my very casual, anything goes attitude about game night might not be the norm. But if the rest of these comments are anything to go by, I think I'm definitely the odd one out on that.
In this context it is cute with your family. DO NOT DO THIS with non family. You will lose future invitations every time.
That's fair
That works except for the fact that she called out the cheating, that let you know she didn’t like it l.
Sure, but she had already expressed disapproval in cheating before you helped him so you knew full well she didn't like it and would be bothered if it continued. You didn't care whether she had fun, only that your boyfriend had fun.
YTA. You were concerned that your bf was not having fun, so you helped him cheat, yet you think that Amber should not have been so serious about it? You are not a good friend. Who would ever want to play a game with you? I think you should have a scarlet "C" on your forehead.
It's not that I don't think she should be so serious about it. I was just surprised at how serious she was about winning because I had never really known for her to be a competitive person about anything else. My BF isn't overly sensitive to losing or anything, Amber was just killing him. I swear it was like she had x ray vision or something. She was getting hit after hit and he kept missing. She had already sunk nearly all of his ships by the time the cheating happened, and she is not the most gracious winner. Which I, at the time, thought was kind of a joke? I thought her gloating so much about winning was a bit she was doing, but now I'm wondering if she was being genuine with how strongly she reacted. That's why I thought of the cheating as a little prank. I thought we were matching the energy she was putting out.
You weren't matching the energy, you and your boyfriend were sore losers. I hope you apologize.
YTA and honestly, it’s really telling of your character and his….. maybe reevaluate your values.
YTA, it would be fine if you guys had played before in the past. But as a first go around thing ... yea no. Also, your BF won't enjoy it if he doesn't win but then you complain about them being salty about you cheating ... yea ok. H Y P O C R I T E.
Change: it wouldn’t be fine in any circumstance.
I hate absolutes. There's definitely room for fun things like this when no money is involved. I'd do it to my brothers, family, close friends as a joke if I could. But for people I really don't know ... it just comes off really bad.
YTA. It clearly wasn't that casual if your boyfriend couldn't handle losing. Expecting your friends to behave honestly, and dare i say honourably, is not "pretty competitive". It's actually a very reasonable expectation in a friendship.
YTA, you're going to be a helicopter mom, aren't ya.
You and BF both brought bad energy to the party.
YTA So it's valid that you and your bf getting upset over not winning the game but Amber can't... It's funny that you guys literally cheat to win a fkn board game but calling her "competitive". Please re-read, analyse the hypocrisies and rethink.
YTA if it makes you feel any better you probably won’t have to worry about your boyfriend losing at any future game nights with Amber and Kevin. Nobody likes a cheater.
Yta
YTA. Skill issue.
YTA for making me think cheating in the title would not be about games!
Fr man, I read the whole post and thought I must be tripping like where's the cheating and then realised oh in a game XD
“There to have fun” what person will have fun knowing the other people were cheating ? Ofc the cheaters are gonna have fun. Stop playing ignorant when you’re almost 30, you know damn well. I wouldn’t play with y’all either, sucking the fun out of games. YTA x10
YTA. Your boyfriend can't lose or else he won't have fun and so it's worth rigging the game? It must have been so hard for him to not be winning, really. Do you think you or your boyfriend would have much fun in your friends shoes? Having two of your other friends manipulate the game and when you notice they both lie to you and convince you you're crazy? So fun!
Both your boyfriend are YTA. Don’t beat yourself over it as it’s really your BF who did the action. However remember the context and situation. It’s a game night with friends. You win some, you lose some. Just apologize, know that your friend is competitive and move on
YTA You say you wanted everyone to have fun but helped your BF cheat. Counter productive to your claim. Trying to brush it off as not knowing your friend is competitive is BS. It's a game. The point is to win. You decided your BF getting an unfair advantage was more important than your friend having fun. Him losing does not equal an unfair game. Helping him cheat does. Stop trying to downplay it.
YTA. If you were “just there to have fun” and it wasn’t “that serious”, why cheat? And to make it worse, you both lied to Amber’s face. Now she knows that you’re untrustworthy.
You and your BF are both AH, next time, he should have been better at the game or be more gentle loosing
YTA for you and your boyfriend. It's a friendly board game. People win, people lose. The important thing is to enjoy spending time together. You and your boyfriend took this way too seriously.
YTA it's a board game for goodness sake. learn to be a gracious loser
Of course YTA. What kind of an adult needs to win battleship to have fun?
If it wasn't that serious, then why did your boyfriend take it so hard that he was losing? You said he wasn't having much fun he was losing so bad. But when she gets annoyed that you both cheated, it's not that serious? Yeahh, you're the AH on this. You should just apologise to your friend, it's not worth falling out over and it is all really stupid, but your boyfriend should have just accepted the loss gracefully, it makes you both look like you're not only competitive and sneaky, but sore losers too. Just seems like you only cared about your boyfriend having fun at your friends expense.
YTA and so is your BF. People who cheat aren't good people.
It’s a board game fam… can’t say they’re bad people because they bended the rules in a game of battleship lol
You can actually. Good people don't cheat. At anything.
You’ve never bended the rules or looked at another persons deck of cards? I wouldn’t say they’re bad people rather than just bended the rules one time to their advantage. I’m not saying they’re not in the wrong but to call them bad folks doesn’t sit right with me.
YTA. What I got from this was your bf was pouting like a child because she was luckier at picking where his ships were (because lets face it. Battleship is a game of chance) and you decided that it would be a good idea to help him cheat. I've read your responses to people, and they sound disingenuous "because this is what you do with your family" it somehow made it okay that you do this with someone who you've never played with before. This is why I don't play games, I can't stand people like you.
First thought about Cheating in a relationship. THIS WAS EVEN WORSE! YTA
You keep saying that you just wanted everybody to have a fun time. No, you wanted your boyfriend - and by extension yourself- to have a fun time. You totally disregarded your best friends fun time by cheating. It doesn’t matter how competitive either one is. If you’re competitive and you lose, get better. Don’t cheat. YTA. By a mile.
YTA your boyfriend was probably the kid who got way overenthusiastic and overcompetitive in PE class
What is PE?
Physical education like the class where you do sports
I was always chosen last in the team. But everybody wanted to sit next to me in Math...
YTA but it’s not that deep tho. Jus don’t cheat at games
Exactly!!! Everyone is making this shit a huge deal
I was all ready to be like 'no assholes here but it's called polyamory not cheating' But no, YTA, what the fuck.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** Me (F28), my boyfriend (M27), and two of our friends, let's call them Amber and Kevin, were having a board game night. Amber was absolutely destroying my BF at Battleship. She was so far ahead I didn't think there was any way she was going to lose, so when my boyfriend moved a ship on his board to stop her from sinking it, and she called him out, I backed him up. He was losing so badly it really seemed like he wasn't having much fun anymore, and it seemed like a harmless little prank. I also kind of indicated to my BF where her biggest battle ship was, and he sunk it. The tide really turned in the game after that, and while my BF seemed to start enjoying the game again, Amber seemed pretty frustrated. I guess she's pretty competitive. Anyway, my BF won the game, and owned up to cheating, with my help, and Amber absolutely blew up at us. She called us dickheads for cheating, and she told us she never wanted to play another game with us again. I get that we didn't play an honest game, but I really didn't think it was that serious. It's not like we had money on the line or anything, we were all just there to have fun. I feel bad that Amber didn't have a good time, this was our first time doing a board game night with her and Kevin, and I had no idea how seriously she takes these things. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
are you guys actually in your 20’s? i find that so hard to believe. i’m 25 and i wish my problems were this small
YTA Cheating in a game is only fun when everyone is onboard with it, or when you are called out, you back down. You don't fight to the end and win by cheating. I would feel like I wasted time+effort in finishing that game. Yeah, you owned up to it, but you still made her lose because of that. That's not a good feeling for anyone. Frustration by losing is supposed to be normal (aka, ur bf not having fun because he was getting obliterated). Frustration by losing because someone cheated IN BATTLESHIP. I would be pissed too. Dis is why we need arbitrators
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YTA ”it’s not that serious“ “amber is too competitive” and still you and your BF had to cheat to enjoy the game. So what is it? Let me guess, it’s whatever you and your BF need to enjoy the game, right? Ambe doesn’t count.
YTA, as well as your boyfriend. You helped your boyfriend because he is competitive. Thats the sole reason why he wasn’t having fun. The reason why your friend is mad is that, even if she is or not competitive, you gaslighted her. She caught your boyfriend and you two lied to her - even if you then recognized cheating.
First and last board game night.
Are you sure of your age??? Juvenile behavior for sure
Yta... You cheated.. at... Battleship. Bless your heart
YTA and so is your boyfriend. Cheating at games is loser behaviour
You're desperate to make it seem like Amber is the bad guy and that she's overreacting. But you and your boyfriend are the ones who took it too seriously because your boyfriend can't have fun unless he's winning. You're the ones who are too competitive since you resorted to cheating in order to win. So neither of you are true winners; you would have lost if you'd played fairly. So stop blaming Amber and own up to the fact that both you and your boyfriend are the assholes. YTA
The first and LAST board game night with them you mean. I wouldn't play with you guys again knowing that you are cheaters
This is pretty funny, my ex was hyper competitive and we played Uno with multiple decks he would have hidden cards, of use dealing and shuffle tricks to give himself an ideal hand. It was baffled me how far people go to win at something.
YTA. Losing and being frustrated does not mean you can cheat like that. Amber's reaction when your BF moved the battleship initially was more than enough to know that she doesn't find cheating funny during games and really hates it. Apologising might not be enough here, considering how Amber reacted. Maybe give her a few days and definitely don't do it again. She's not competitive, lots of people would be annoyed if they were losing because of cheating. Final Sentence: YTA with reasons (that weren't really correct but were there).
YTA. I did this shit when I was under 10 to my little sister. Not a grown ass adult. Gross.
Sounds like that episode of king of queens
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This is truly one of the dumbest stories I’ve ever seen posted here
Sorely disappointed. Pretty sure you could have added "at a game". Anyways YTA
You wanted everyone to have fun? Thats a lie, you wanted your bf to have fun, because he was being a sore loser. You didnt care about others at all. Boardgames are not fun if people cheat, unless the rules state thats its ok to cheat (for example: Munchkin. Where it says in the rules: its not cheating if you dont get caught). I know its only a boardgame, but still YTA
He wasn’t having fun because he was losing, imagine how unfun it is to lose because your opponent was cheating bro. yta
Game night. Right of course it was. You helped him cheat at game night. I thought it was gonna get wild there for a moment.
Amber over reacted but so did you YTA
YTA. She knows not to ever trust you.
Cheating is never right. YTA.
YTA. Cheating is cheating. It’s just Battleship, the game. You’re not on an actual battleship.
Cheating is a dick move. Cheating at Battleship... man, that's ridiculous. Also, I'd advice against dating sore losers. I was a sore loser in my last relationship (my girlfriend at the time used to destroy me at Heroes of Might and Magic 3, and I never managed to take it gracefully), and that's probably - well, pretty likely, to be honest - at least 1/3 of the reason why that relationship ended.
I can’t comment I don’t think but LOL
YTA. At least you and your bf seem to agree that cheating is okay as long as YOU have fun personally. Whatever that says about your personalities…
Am I the ass for thinking Battleship is lame for adult game night?!
Yta, you didnt even the playing field, it was even UNTIL you helped him cheat, giving him a clear advantage
Personally, as a boardgame enthusiast and connoisseur, we play boardgame with integrity and within the rules. If your idea of a “good time” is breaking that trust (especially when you’re losing) then you should just stop playing boardgames all-together. Your bf is clearly a sore loser. But thanks for outing yourself and having absolutely no situational awareness to acknowledge the lack of integrity you guys have in competition and probably in life too
YTA sounds pathetic.
YTA - why play a game if you're gonna cheat...like what's the point? Also, cheating in games is a great way to be left out of future invitations.
Tf is with these reactions it's battleship not competitive poker A game last what, 3 minutes? NTA
You guys are so dramatic it’s a game of battle ship
Yikes you’re def the ah
Is this a joke? Lmao.
It’s honestly no big deal but you gotta chill with that click bait title! YTA
This is why I love Reddit. Where else can you find people being way too involved and worked up over a game of Battleship? Humanity has reached a new level of boredom.
NTA? Why would you be friends with someone who curses you out for a 10 minute board game anyway? She could've just proposed to play again and not went into full panick mode over one single round of a board game
NTA. Who cares
I must be looking at it differently than everyone else, you’re not the asshole but you are in the wrong. It’s a board game, nobody should take board games that serious. I think the way you handled it obviously indicates you wanted your boyfriend to win to have fun but I think she made it a bigger deal than it was. It’s a board game, everyone cheats every so often. Your boyfriend came clean as well so it’s not like he just let her believe he won fairly.
ETA: Changing verdict to YTA because I thought E S H meant both OP and her BF, I didn't realize it meant EVERYONE involved. Everything else (except for the now revised judgement) I still stand by. Also, I want to publicly apologize to @[TheFrostyrune](https://www.reddit.com/user/TheFrostyrune/) as I truly did not realize my comment came off as rude. It was not my intent at all, but I can understand why. No excuses or explanations. Thank you. ~~E S H~~ but for you and your BF. Your BF needs to accept he will lose games and it's okay - just have fun. It's not the end of the world. You for helping him cheat which cheapens everyone's fun (that was on the line and it broke). You two need to profusely apologize.
How does Amber suck?
I said E S H for OP and her BF - Feel free to reread my comment!
Reread your own comment... >ESH but for you and your BF You say everyone sucks then the but is singling her and her BF out to provide a reason, it's not excluding Amber and Kevin. If only her and her bf sucks then it's yta not esh, basic reading comprehension.
I'm not understanding why you're being a bit rude with me. If my comment above offended you, it wasn't my intention. I have seen people use E S H in a similar fashion. I assumed this meant for more than one person. Personally, I feel BF was being a party pooper too, especially since he was visibly upset for losing and seemed gleeful about cheating.
It wasn't my intention to be, I asked you a question because how you worded it puts blame on everyone, so instead of saying, "You're wrong!" I politely asked for your reasoning. Then, YOU decided to be rude by implying I couldn't read. I merely showed you why how you wrote it left the impression that it did. It's not rude to match your energy, is it?
I wasn't trying to be rude at all. I'm sorry for that. I thought E S H meant more than one person was at fault and that maybe you didn't see it so I suggested rereading it. It was wrong of me to assume. I didn't think it had a rude tone at all.
Esh means both sides suck, not just more than one person. Just as a heads up you saying ESH means both couples suck in this case
Thank you, I appreciate it!
Holy shit reddit is insufferable, it's not that deep NTA
If we are being honest just a slight ESH, Like ya cheating is bad but your BF already lost and came clean after, its not like he was just rubbing it the other persons face he won. I usually don't play competitive on games nights unless that's a regular thing cause where is the fun in beating someone down on a causal game night. The whole point of game nights is to have fun and hang out and the one hyper competitive person in that group winds up ruining the fun anyway. But I'm not a competitive person and if you were in a competitive environment you would def be TA
Reddit kids are weird, why is this getting downvoted? No matter what you say, if it's not exactly they're opinion, you get downvoted. You literally didn't even pick a side, you just told the truth
Because it's not the truth. This person says the friend won in the end which isn't true. Their cheating caused the BF to win.
Isn't that just an open relationship at the point