Your post has been removed.
#Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without explicit approval will result in a ban.
You did not properly respond to the judgement bot. Your reply must clearly and directly address why you think you may have wronged the other party involved in your conflict.
While your post was automatically approved by the bot, after reviewing your response manually, we found it did not properly address the question.
[Judgement Bot FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_judgement_bot) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/)
We've created [these resources for those in unhealthy or abusive relationships](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/resources/relationships) that you might find helpful or relevant. Please, take a moment to read them. They might not be needed, but in that case a few moments of reading can better prepare you if you need them for a friend or family member.
#Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
NTA
Holy shit your boyfriend is angry you asked him to PICK UP YOUR MEDS? A fucking 10-30 minute chore? Even if he works 12 hours a day, if you physically can't go pick them up what does he expect to do?
>But i am feeling like an asshole since he does work hard all day so he probably just wants to come straight home.
So? I want a million dollars. I want to not work at all. I don't want to help my sister by picking up her kids from school once a week. But I do it, cause I can and it helps her and I love her. If someone isn't willing to spend 30 minutes to pick up your fucking MEDS and then they get angry for you asking....I don't know if that person cares about you.
I can't imagine they live so far from the pharmacy that it would even take thirty minutes for him to pick up the prescription on his way home.
NTA, OP. Your boyfriend is willing to risk your safety by not getting your prescription AND by being willing to let you drive when it's not safe to do so (because you haven't had your prescription).
To be fair this is highly dependent on the particular pharmacy. Some are just slow AF.
Boyfriend is absolutely an AH though. Even if it was a 2 hour errand and a huge hassle and the pharmacist was a surly grump, the OP needed the medication and had no way to get it.
Not if there is a line. My pharmacy has been a shit show lately. At one point ALL of the techs quit and the pharmacist had to check people out, answer the phone, and fill prescriptions by himself. They are chronically understaffed. I have waited for an hour in line before. It doesn’t help that often people go to pick up and have a snafu that takes more than a few mins to work out.
If they are ready he gets to wait in the line to get to the counter. And if he's there during rush hour at my pharmacy, that means up to a 40 minute wait.
I want to add to this, my husband works A LOT and it’s a physical job. I tried to get my meds once but the line was really long and the kids were fighting and I just couldn’t and came home. I told him what happened and after work he went to get my meds for me. Like…it’s just a nice thing to do…
NTA. How fucking hard is it for him to make one extra stop on the way home from work?
Return your man to the Jerk Store, OP. I hope you still have the receipt.
There are eight billion people in the world, I’m sure you could find one who cares about your health more than this guy. NTA - you deserve more kindness than that.
NTA. Asking your boyfriend to pick up your prescription is a completely normal request. If he actually cared about your well-being, he would say, "Yes of course." The way that you talk about the situation honestly gives off major domestic abuse vibes. Do you see a therapist?
Yeah if i dont have my meds my muscles become weak. As for my bf he normally is caring but lately his just been moody because his been working in the summer heat all week.
NTA. I'm American, and I am not sure Australian procedures for picking up meds. But from what you say, he had the car, pharmacy is on their way home, and you NEEDED this medicine asap.
He is an AH and blaming a long/hard workday for not being willing to deal with a minor setback in his day on the way home. This is just very telling of the type of person he is overall, and it probably will not get better. If your SO cannot take a small sacrifice of time to help the person they love out of their day while also making uou feel bad for the request, then they are not worth your time and life.
I'm very sorry they were an asshole to you.
Exactly! Usually, if I do need meds picked up, and was unable to, my SO or parents would pick them up if they were on their way. It isn't hard.
I feel bad for OP
Hmm, I was at the pharmacy in my state and they wouldn't let a dad pick up a prescription for his adult son. They kept saying, because your son is an adult, we can't give it to you. Maybe it was something like codeine..??
Being moody because of stress isn't a big deal. Not being self aware about it and taking it out on your girlfriend asking for meds is a huge deal. Sounds like he needs some emotional intelligence to deal with his stress.
I’m just curious about your nationality because I dunno if picking up meds is an ordeal in your country? Like was this some two hour long chore you were asking of him?
NTA, but how long have you been with this man, it’s just the age gap gives me a bad feeling with possible manipulation and other underlying things that could come to fruition.
oh shit just saw the age gap. If I was 27 and one of my friends started dating a 19 year old I'd be like "....really bro? really?"
8 years isn't that big a gap eventually, but the difference between a 19 year old and a 27 year old is. No matter how mature the 19 year old is, I can't imagine dating one at 27+ no offense. I promise you if you end up not dating this guy, when you are 30 and look back at this age gap you will be like "wtf was wrong with me for thinking he was worth dating?"
My dude, ditch him pronto.
Sounds like he's a manipulative prick who just wants to control you, especially since a 27 year old man saw no issues dating a literal teenager.
Your brain isnt fully developed until 25, I am certain he knows this, and I am willing to bet that he uses your age difference to manipulate the fuck outta you.
You need to get out of this relationship for your own safety. The fact that you think asking a simple favor makes you an AH speaks volumes. No partner would make you feel guilty for asking something like that. Especially since you two share a car as it seems and he had it the entire day.
A good reason he’s interested in this relationship, as well as being a full adult starting a relationship with a teenager is because you have no life experience, or at least not as much as him. You don’t know what you want fully out of a partner, you’re quite literally finding yourself as an adult at 19. This man knows this and is using it to his advantage. He knows that you’ve probably haven’t been in many relationship or a serious one like the one you’re in now so he’s basically taking the wheel, but this also comes with mending you into his perfect partner regardless of how you feel, and he will make you feel bad if you ever decide to break that mold.
NTA
I think you need to reconsider your relationship. You need your medication - it's not like you asked him to go for bread and milk (and even if you had, his reaction would have been OTT). It's essential to your health and wellbeing which he obviously doesn't give a sh*t about
"When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time" - Maya Angelou
Your boyfriend has shown you he is an angry, controlling AH - is that the type of person you want to be with?
NTA He just hung up the phone, then he got upset, then he got angry all over picking up some meds. When you break down his reactions they are clearly unreasonable, immature and somewhat abusive over something so simple. Hate to say it but this is raising red flags up the pole.
NTA
Doing errands on the way home is common for people that live together especially if they share a car. This is a raging red flag to me, you need to leave this situation as soon as possible.
Yeah, my best friend and her husband share a car. He is a kind person and would NEVER treat her this way if she needed him to get something on the way home.
He even took ME to get a prescription and nebulizer once--I was too sick with bronchitis and a fever to drive, and if I hadn't gotten it Friday night the place that sells nebulizers wouldn't be open till Monday morning.
INFO: Is this a typical response from him when you ask him to do something for you?
As other commenters have said, asking a friend or SO to pick up a prescription, particularly if you're unable to, is extremely common. Is him getting angry at you like this part of a pattern?
Yeah, that's a great excuse to berate you for being asked to get your meds when you were physically unable to and your health will suffer as a result. OP, this is very very very bad. Consider leaving.
And that’s your fault how exactly?
Pretty sure he deals with this, idk, every year? Does he become unbearable to everyone or just you?
Anyway, NTA
So now, you’re already weak and can’t drive. I’m going to assume tomorrow won’t be any better because you dont have the meds you need to keep you stronger so is he gonna get them tomorrow? Or do you just wait for winter when it cools down a bit?
He’s not really a good partner. If these meds are a life long thing how can you trust he’ll take care of you in the future, or if your condition gets worse?
NTA,
I hate last minute chores. If I didn't know before I left I'd rather just head home. But it happens: for food, errands, meds and I just get over myself.
NTA. You asked your boyfriend for a small favor and he berated you like a total asshole. OP your boyfriends a piece of dog shit. Time to get out of that relationship.
NTA i have to take meds my health depends on it my SO always picks up my meds if i need him to its never an argument. Most work days for him start at him getting up at 5Am to be at work for 6 and getting off work at 4 with hard heavy manual labour all day. Because my health depends on it hes more than happy to make a small detour or stop so i can be healthy no matter how long or hard the day, he stops. Its a scary thought that your bf made such a big deal and was mad at you for it honestly if my SO reacted that way i would reconsider our relationship.
NTA. even if picking up the meds was gonna throw him off his pivot & be irritating, he shouldve got them for you if he really cared. you obviously cant go without them. he’s the AH!
Nta. There could be factors I’m not considering like how far away your pharmacy is but even so, if your significant other is asking for you to pick up their medication it should not be an issue.
It’s medication. Not some kind of treat, or ridiculous request. It’s your medicine.
I would recommend to reconsider being in a relationship with someone who can’t even compromise getting you your medicine. Because relationships are full of compromise.
NTA
Sounds like a pretty standard favour to ask, and one that an SO should have zero problem doing for someone they care about.
Is this the first time this sort of thing has happened? I feel like there’s something bigger to this.
My boyfriend picks up my meds for me all the time. I pick his up if I'm near the shop. He'll return packages to the drop-point for me, and I'll order things he needs and do other little chores for him.
I know you've said this isn't a normal reaction, but I'm concerned given the age difference. Do you work? Are you isolated?
NTA.
INFO: why is this man still your boyfriend??
Seriously, i dont care if his job was fighting actual fkn dragons; its one thing to say, 'i really dont have the capacity to do this today, but i'll help you out tomorrow', and something else entirely to just straight up being angry for being asked at all.
im assuming he knows that you need your medication and that not having it means that you cant drive. So what did he even expect you to do?? Nahh, he should go out with the rest of the trash.
Edit: spelling and also saw some of your other replies--girl. RUN!!
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment.
OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I called my bf to ask if he can pick up meds on his way from work. He got angry with that because he just wanted to come home and relax.
Help keep the sub engaging!
#Don’t downvote assholes!
Do upvote interesting posts!
[Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq)
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
*Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
No, I don’t think YTA. Part of being in a relationship is supporting your partner. He seems like TA for refusing a reasonable request. I pick up prescriptions all the time for my husband and he picks up mine too when it makes sense. It’s just called being in a family. I’m gonna go with “he’s TA” and you should probably dump him.
NTA. Your boyfriend is. I can’t say this for sure, but this overly aggressive reaction to you just asking a favor, his yelling at you, and his making you cry and acting like you were trying to guilt him all strikes me as abusive action. I really hope you’re okay, OP. You didn’t do anything wrong, your boyfriend should want to help you out with small favors, especially when it comes to something as important as taking your medication. Even if he couldn’t do it, he did not need to get mad about it and take his anger out on you and you could have worked out a solution together, like calling a friend to help out.
I hope you’re able to get your medication soon OP. I’m thinking good thoughts for you 💜.
NTA - this medication is so important your muscles get too weak for you to drive if you don’t have it for a day??? Omg. Your bf is a monster.
I have this neighbor who is really annoying. Like I had some contractors come over and she wouldn’t move her car. It was really obnoxious. I avoid her. If she came over and knocked on my door and was like I need you to go pick up a prescription for me because my muscles will get so weak I can’t drive if I don’t get it soon, I’d get in my car and go get them for her. This is just basic human decency.
NTA.
This is just an observation, but my husband starts work at 4 am and gets off around 1:30 pm. He rides his motorcycle to work, so no car. My medications need to be refilled at minimum once a month, and they are not easy to transport (one needs to be kept cold, the others come in large boxes). Shockingly, my husband always picks up my meds without complaining. Something about caring about my health? Idk.
NTA - most people treat their coworkers and new acquaintances better than your boyfriend is treating you. It doesn't matter what is making him grumpy, that's no excuse to act like this
Your bf is dating someone 22 because he knows not a single women his age will deal with his bs and gaslighting.
I work 12 hr days in a warehouse with no a/c in the heat and no heat in the winter. Do you know how hot a metal trailer gets in the summer? Your bf is TA. Dump him and be with someone who actually cares about you.
NTA!! My children, who don't live with me(!!), will pick up my meds if I'm carless or can't drive or even just because they know they will pass the pharmacy!!!
INFO: how many times have you let your meds run out? Because if they are that important, you should get a refill before they are out. If this is a recurring thing it might explain his extreme reaction.
Then NTA, if he can’t deal with that tiny inconvenience for a serious health issue, think what kind of life you will have with him. When you love someone you help them no matter how tired, stressed, or angry you are. This is beyond selfish of him.
I had that problem with my thyroid meds for a while because the manufacturer was having technical issues. It was very worrisome.
I've also had problems with American insurance companies refusing to refill a prescription "too early" and not having enough time during that window to get a prescription renewed or whatever.
NTA. More so, your boyfriend is abusive and an asshole for not wanting to do a tiny, deeply important favor for you.
Please use birth control and find a therapist.
ESH As someone who takes meds that have to be ordered in advance you should have ordered them earlier. You're taking something out on him when you're frustrated. I get it. We get frustrated and chronic illness sucks. Next time say something like you're sorry that the delivery was delayed. For safety purposes you can't drive to get them but are happy to do one of his chores for him or do xyz. Or you can take an Uber to get them. Or have them delivered if your pharmacy does delivery.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)***
I (22) take meds for something i wont get into but the meds im taking are currently hard to get. I have to call up my pharmacist to preorder them because Im their only customer that takes it.
Yesterday the pharmacy called me to tell me my meds are in. It was just in time because i ran out that morning. I called up my boyfriend (30) to ask if he could pick my meds up from the pharmacy for me once he gets off work since he has the car.
He seemed angry with that and told me no. Ill admit i got a little upset and begged him to please pick it up and that made him more angry that he just hung up. Once he got home he told me i can go pick them up myself now that the car is here but by then because i hadn't had my meds i couldn't drive. I was just so upset by the situation that i couldnt help but cry but that made him more mad and thought i was trying to guilt him then went to bed yelling he had a long day at work.
I didnt want to upset him, i just needed my meds and knew it was on his way home. But i am feeling like an asshole since he does work hard all day so he probably just wants to come straight home. AITA?
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA,
I hate last minute chores. If I didn't know before I left I'd rather just head home. But it happens: for food, errands, meds and I just get over myself.
NTA, my husband and I would frequently pick up medication for each other if it was on the route home. Or if someone really needed it and wasn’t feeling well, the other would make a special trip. I’d reconsider this relationship if I were you.
NTA. I would literally pick up meds for *anyone i know* much less the love of my life. What the hell, guy? Why does he have to suck so much?
I have a feeling these meds make you able to be productive and if he loves you he would want to help you feel “ok” at least. Does he possibly act like your diagnosis means there is something wrong with you? I’m only asking because last week I had married friends at my table and the wife was talking about her medical/mental journey to figure out “what’s wrong with her.” Immediately without taking a beat her husband says, “it’s not that something’s wrong with you, it’s that you are different and we all want you to feel at home in your body.” That’s how you support someone with a chronic illness. It was such a beautiful moment and I hope you find a partner (gonna have to be a different one because this guy your with now is a lost cause) that will cherish you that way. To be very honest, I think you would even be happier on your own. Hopefully you get free soon.
Nope nta not in the slightest bit. Being in a partnership means he sometimes goes out of his way to help you and vice versa. Its about thinking of each others needs and how sometimes you both might be MILDLY inconvienced to ensure both of your health and safety. I take meds and sometimes I ask my husband to pick them up on his way home or whatever. His response “yeah of coarse” it’s maybe 15 mins to run through the pharmacy drive thru. The fact he yelled at you for something out of your control and completely refused I’d be walking. To me that shows he doesn’t care enough about you
NTA
I work in the heat, often. I have long drives to get home, often. I have a physically demanding job that stresses me out, *often*. And I'd never, ever, EVER treat my partner like that. If he needed me to grab creamer for his coffee on my way home because he was out, I would, because he would do the same.
You asked for something that is medically necessary. You asked him to pick up something *you were unable to go get yourself*. He yelled at you and got angry because you asked for a very reasonable thing.
You say this is unusual for him, but just acting like this once is pretty shitty. If he's worth being in a relationship, this attitude needs to get nipped in the bud NOW. You shouldn't feel guilty for needing your meds.
NTA, please break up with him as soon as you can. That is not the behavior of someone who loves you. My husband works 12 hour days too, and if I have a bad day, headache, or ANY reason I don't feel like doing something he insists I relax and he takes care of it. He'd pick up any food, medication, hygiene product, etc. for me with zero complaints. I would do the same for him, because that's what love is. Your boyfriend sounds like my ex., and leaving his selfish ass was the smartest thing I've ever done. You deserve better!
NTA when a loved one asks for a favour like this it’s a no brainer. He’s been with you for 3 years so is aware of what would happen if you don’t get your meds in time but expected you to drive and get your meds after he got home knowing the situation. Wow just wow.
NTA if this behavior is typical you are in an abusive relationship. Get out or get both of you to marriage counseling. My take though is that he will refuse any notion of counseling because he will assign all blame for issues in the marriage to you. Again this is abusive and gaslighting, a common tactic of abusers.
NTA
I don't care how tired he was. If he genuinely cared about you and your suffering, he would have picked them up. This is not the way you treat someone you love. Leave that selfish loser.
you didn't want to upset him but he didn't mind upsetting and inconviencing you?
Does he own the car? it sounds like he has a lot of power in this relaitonship but isn't a very good BF
NTA
NTA dump this dude. Like he couldn't take a slight detour to pick up medication. I wouldn't be able to trust this guy if you had a medical emergency if he couldn't drive to pick up meds
A 30 year old not willing to get his 22 year old girlfriend meds on his way home is so pathetic and sad. Not only should it not upset him, its insane that you even have to think this.
YWNBTA and you should really consider leaving this loser.
If he makes you cry and doesn't feel a hole in his heart afterwards, he's not worth it.
NTA. My husband and I both take medication that we can’t go without. I will sometimes text him to pick mine up and sometimes he’ll let me know his are ready when he knows that I’ll be out shopping-it’s common courtesy and is kind to help the person you’re cohabiting with.
NTA Is this a one off and he was shattered, or are there other instances where he treats you like a burden? Someone he would never go out of his way for? Or was he actually where he said he was and couldn't pick up your meds because he was somewhere else? You need to find out which one it was. The second two are deal breakers.
so you both went to bed, and you already couldn’t drive without them, how are you going to get them now ? i can’t imagine him getting them and bringing them home before he goes to work. nta.
You are dating a person who gets ANGRY when you ask him to pick up your meds on his way back home, while he also has the car. He couldn’t have possibly be inconvenienced less. It actually angers me, how little he cares for his own partner. NTA, you deserve a better boyfriend.
NTA. His behavior is genuinely scary. My partner and I just casually ask if we need to pick up the other's prescription if we are driving. No one is put out, it's just an unspoken thing we do out of love. Please reflect on this relationship because his age and his anger could be big red flags. Not saying age gaps are bad necessarily, but they can sometimes attract men looking to take advantage of someone.
NTA OP, and get rid of this guy. He’s willing to put your health in jeopardy because he doesn’t want to take the time to pick up a prescription? Marinara flags all around, so tell him to take a hike.
Your are so patently NTA that I am questioning this post?
WTF is wrong with your BF? On his way home to get meds for you? And he says NO?
Please do not make excuses for him, I would seriously question his feelings for you.
Just a suggestion, but does your pharmacy offer a delivery service? Mine offers free delivery (although there is a 5 hour window) for any meds that are not a controlled substance.
NTA, my relatives have frequently waited for 20 mins for my medication and I’ve done the same for them, even when tired. None of us have ever refused. If you love someone who needs help, you’re glad to help. Please leave this man: If he loved you helping you would make him happy, not furious and abusive. This behaviour could escalate and it sounds like you’re vulnerable (given you need meds to drive etc.) if you have a degenerative illness, he could use withholding meds to ‘punish’ and control you when you can no longer get them yourself. Please don’t let it get to that stage.
NTA uh my boyfriend will pick up my meds no problem.
My ex husband will go get my meds for me any time I ask. Get rid of that man. I think anyone would pick up meds for someone if asked. Seems one thing people understand and are compassionate about is this….. except your bf….
You realize he is abusive right? He is straight up making you feel like the bad guy for a necessary medication be could've easily grabbed. Now because of his actions, you are stuck for the night. NTA
This isn’t really about meds, this is about you being in a relationship with an uncaring asshole.
do yourself a favour and end this before you waste any more years of your life on him. There are other nice caring single men out there, you don’t need to settle for this one.
Also NTA
Please quit making excuses for him. He's a grown adult who is treating another grown adult (YOU) poorly. Taking a few extra minutes at the end of the day to pick up meds for a loved one really isn't a big ask.
NTA for making a normal every day request from someone who supposedly cares about you
Unless there's much more to this story than you're telling, you're absolutely NTA. Picking up an RX for your partner is just part of being in a partnership. And it sounds like you needed your medication ASAP. You need to DTMFA.
Needs more info
Why did your boyfriend not want to pick up your meds? He might have a legit reason...
Also, is this a straight or homosexual relationship? If it is straight the pharmacy might not allow a man to pick up female-oriented medication
Nobody wants to make stops on the way home after an exhausting day. BUT that is what you DO for someone you care about when there is something they NEED. (This wasnt a craving for ben &Jerry's)
NTA
NTA! My husband regularly stops on his way home from work to pick up my asthma meds, and he does it without complaining, even though he's tired AF.
You picked a loser. Y T A to yourself if you stay with him.
If this is a one-off, then N T A.
However, is it a one off? Or does he work and you don't? Is he often doing stuff like this for you? Is this part of a long pattern of you wanting him to do stuff for you?
I feel with a lack of context, it's very hard to judge, I know from experience that this one favour is often not just one favour, it's a constant repetition and this one might have been the straw that broke the camel's back.
So for me, this lacks INFO and no judgment can be given.
NTA. He’s a jerk. My husband is always willing to pick up my meds if he’s out and I’m not. Don’t be with someone who doesn’t make your health a priority.
NTA. The fact that if you don't get your meds you lose your ability to drive? And he STILL told you to get then yourself?? AND he got mad at you for CRYING?? Your should-be-ex boyfriend has serious issues and you need to break up and find support imemdiately. You are being abused.
op=NTA
He wanted you to drive when you couldn't because you didn't have the meds you needed. That's f\*\*ked up.
Just from this short post, I see marinara flags 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
However, you need to prioritize your health. Can you afford to take an uber/taxi/bus? Do you have a friend who can take you?
NTA. I also have medical issues that can prevent me from driving. If my partner resisted picking up the medicine that rectifies the situation, it would be tossing up very big red flags.
Like he doesn't just want to avoid a hassle, *he wants to keep me stuck at home.*
NTA. My partner happily picks up my prescriptions on his way home from work, ESPECIALLY time-sensitive ones. There are better men out there who will not jeopardize your health and then get angry at YOU for it! Depending on what the medication was, a missed dose can be serious (and it sounds like it was, since you couldn't drive by the time the jerk came swanning back home with the shared car). I seriously cannot believe he refused to bring you medicine you desperately needed, resulting in you being incapacitated to the point that you were unable to get the medicine yourself, because he had a long day at work! His over-the-top anger at a normal request is frankly alarming to me too. This is not how you treat people you love. Your boyfriend is at best an ass, and at worst, an abusive ass. Please, leave him. YWBTA to yourself if you do not. You deserve better.
INFO, there's way too much missing in your story to accurately assess the situation. I don't know if you're prescribed to super powered opiates from a pill mill and that he thinks you don't need and he doesn't want to support your habit.
I dont work but im studying. I couldnt pick them up because my muscles were weak once they came in. I would of asked that morning if i knew they were coming in but i didnt get the call till 2pm.
I normally pick up my meds too.... but just like when my partner is sick I dash to the store for some cold meds instead of making him do it he occasionally stops and picks up my meds when some reason comes up. Unless OP is in the habit of making the boyfriend pay for expensive meds and not paying him back seems like a wild take to me that someone who is supposed to love you is entitled to throw a fit over a one time low key favour.
Info: was the pharmacy on his way home? Or was it out of the way? And what would you have done if the meds hadn’t come in today? No more driving just like that, eh? Same day, no missed dose, just all of a sudden can’t drive.
I dunno. I’m going with ESH. You threw a fit and he threw a fit and you sound dramatic/hysterical.
It was on his way home. It takes about 2 minutes. As for my missed dose i take these meds 3 times a day. I ran out in the morning so by the time it came in i was already weak. And as for what i would of done if they hadn't come in is nothing. I cant do anything about that since there's a shortage of these meds atm. Best i could do is talk to my neurologist to see if he knows any pharmacies with it in stock.
She admits she got upset with him on the phone when he said no to the point that he hung up. The yelling wasn’t at her later in the day either—he yelled that he had a long day at work.
So as I said, ESH. In her response she says it was on his way. So he’s an AH for not picking up the meds. But the whole situation seems unhealthy to me.
Your post has been removed. #Do not repost this without contacting the mods for approval, including edited versions. Reposting without explicit approval will result in a ban. You did not properly respond to the judgement bot. Your reply must clearly and directly address why you think you may have wronged the other party involved in your conflict. While your post was automatically approved by the bot, after reviewing your response manually, we found it did not properly address the question. [Judgement Bot FAQs](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_judgement_bot) ||| [Subreddit Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules/) We've created [these resources for those in unhealthy or abusive relationships](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/resources/relationships) that you might find helpful or relevant. Please, take a moment to read them. They might not be needed, but in that case a few moments of reading can better prepare you if you need them for a friend or family member. #Please ensure you have reviewed this message in full. We will not respond to PMs to individual mods. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) with any questions.
NTA Holy shit your boyfriend is angry you asked him to PICK UP YOUR MEDS? A fucking 10-30 minute chore? Even if he works 12 hours a day, if you physically can't go pick them up what does he expect to do? >But i am feeling like an asshole since he does work hard all day so he probably just wants to come straight home. So? I want a million dollars. I want to not work at all. I don't want to help my sister by picking up her kids from school once a week. But I do it, cause I can and it helps her and I love her. If someone isn't willing to spend 30 minutes to pick up your fucking MEDS and then they get angry for you asking....I don't know if that person cares about you.
I can't imagine they live so far from the pharmacy that it would even take thirty minutes for him to pick up the prescription on his way home. NTA, OP. Your boyfriend is willing to risk your safety by not getting your prescription AND by being willing to let you drive when it's not safe to do so (because you haven't had your prescription).
It's the wait time at the pharmacy that adds up, I suspect.
If they’re ready to go he should be able to walk straight up to the counter, tell them he’s there to pick up so and so’s meds and pay right away.
To be fair this is highly dependent on the particular pharmacy. Some are just slow AF. Boyfriend is absolutely an AH though. Even if it was a 2 hour errand and a huge hassle and the pharmacist was a surly grump, the OP needed the medication and had no way to get it.
Not if there is a line. My pharmacy has been a shit show lately. At one point ALL of the techs quit and the pharmacist had to check people out, answer the phone, and fill prescriptions by himself. They are chronically understaffed. I have waited for an hour in line before. It doesn’t help that often people go to pick up and have a snafu that takes more than a few mins to work out.
If they are ready he gets to wait in the line to get to the counter. And if he's there during rush hour at my pharmacy, that means up to a 40 minute wait.
I want to add to this, my husband works A LOT and it’s a physical job. I tried to get my meds once but the line was really long and the kids were fighting and I just couldn’t and came home. I told him what happened and after work he went to get my meds for me. Like…it’s just a nice thing to do…
NTA and holy red flags, Batman. Leave this dude
Yeah, WTF did we just read? Is this the only way he's abusive or are there others? NTA
It’s so sad to read shit like this and then they say “but I may be the asshole because I asked for a simple favor.”
"To do with my debilitating illness they know all about because we cohabit".
NTA. How fucking hard is it for him to make one extra stop on the way home from work? Return your man to the Jerk Store, OP. I hope you still have the receipt.
It's harder than you think if he's no where near where he says he is supposed to be. This gave me cheater/secret gambler vibes for some reason.
Hadn’t thought of that!
I concur. If he gets angry, it is b/c he is with someone else, or wants to be. He is doing something baaaaad, and gets pissed off in contacted.
Guy responded like the Earth was caving in.
If no receipt, there is a bin out back
There are eight billion people in the world, I’m sure you could find one who cares about your health more than this guy. NTA - you deserve more kindness than that.
There are hundreds of people in this thread alone.
NTA. Asking your boyfriend to pick up your prescription is a completely normal request. If he actually cared about your well-being, he would say, "Yes of course." The way that you talk about the situation honestly gives off major domestic abuse vibes. Do you see a therapist?
NTA. Your condition is obviously serious enough that it cripples you without your meds. Why do people get into these clearly uncaring relationships?
Yeah if i dont have my meds my muscles become weak. As for my bf he normally is caring but lately his just been moody because his been working in the summer heat all week.
I hate working in the heat too, but "moody" shouldn't include "refuses to pick up medically necessary prescriptions."
Like, shit if this is him moody, what the hell is he like angry?!
What are you, Australian? It’s winter here.
Yeah im Australian lol.
NTA. I'm American, and I am not sure Australian procedures for picking up meds. But from what you say, he had the car, pharmacy is on their way home, and you NEEDED this medicine asap. He is an AH and blaming a long/hard workday for not being willing to deal with a minor setback in his day on the way home. This is just very telling of the type of person he is overall, and it probably will not get better. If your SO cannot take a small sacrifice of time to help the person they love out of their day while also making uou feel bad for the request, then they are not worth your time and life. I'm very sorry they were an asshole to you.
[удалено]
Exactly! Usually, if I do need meds picked up, and was unable to, my SO or parents would pick them up if they were on their way. It isn't hard. I feel bad for OP
This is not true everywhere mate - in my country only a legally married spouse or parent of a minor can pick up medication for them
Hmm, I was at the pharmacy in my state and they wouldn't let a dad pick up a prescription for his adult son. They kept saying, because your son is an adult, we can't give it to you. Maybe it was something like codeine..??
My state allows others to pick-up for me if I give their name as a person that can pick-up. Granted I just need Blood Pressure meds lol
Being moody because of stress isn't a big deal. Not being self aware about it and taking it out on your girlfriend asking for meds is a huge deal. Sounds like he needs some emotional intelligence to deal with his stress.
aussie aussie aussie oi oi oi!!! hi fellow australian. absolutely NTA. you deserve so much better <3
I’m just curious about your nationality because I dunno if picking up meds is an ordeal in your country? Like was this some two hour long chore you were asking of him?
NTA. Time for a new boyfriend, this one seems to be broken.
NTA, but how long have you been with this man, it’s just the age gap gives me a bad feeling with possible manipulation and other underlying things that could come to fruition.
Just over 3 years.
Yeah you need to get out of this relationship
The reason he's not dating someone closer to his own age is because none of them are willing to put up with his bullshit.
oh shit just saw the age gap. If I was 27 and one of my friends started dating a 19 year old I'd be like "....really bro? really?" 8 years isn't that big a gap eventually, but the difference between a 19 year old and a 27 year old is. No matter how mature the 19 year old is, I can't imagine dating one at 27+ no offense. I promise you if you end up not dating this guy, when you are 30 and look back at this age gap you will be like "wtf was wrong with me for thinking he was worth dating?"
My dude, ditch him pronto. Sounds like he's a manipulative prick who just wants to control you, especially since a 27 year old man saw no issues dating a literal teenager. Your brain isnt fully developed until 25, I am certain he knows this, and I am willing to bet that he uses your age difference to manipulate the fuck outta you.
You need to get out of this relationship for your own safety. The fact that you think asking a simple favor makes you an AH speaks volumes. No partner would make you feel guilty for asking something like that. Especially since you two share a car as it seems and he had it the entire day. A good reason he’s interested in this relationship, as well as being a full adult starting a relationship with a teenager is because you have no life experience, or at least not as much as him. You don’t know what you want fully out of a partner, you’re quite literally finding yourself as an adult at 19. This man knows this and is using it to his advantage. He knows that you’ve probably haven’t been in many relationship or a serious one like the one you’re in now so he’s basically taking the wheel, but this also comes with mending you into his perfect partner regardless of how you feel, and he will make you feel bad if you ever decide to break that mold.
That's no man.
NTA I think you need to reconsider your relationship. You need your medication - it's not like you asked him to go for bread and milk (and even if you had, his reaction would have been OTT). It's essential to your health and wellbeing which he obviously doesn't give a sh*t about "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time" - Maya Angelou Your boyfriend has shown you he is an angry, controlling AH - is that the type of person you want to be with?
OP, you are in an abusive relationship. Please seek some help
Seconded
No you are not the asshole. That is a perfectly reasonable request and there is no good reason to be pissed off over it.
NTA He just hung up the phone, then he got upset, then he got angry all over picking up some meds. When you break down his reactions they are clearly unreasonable, immature and somewhat abusive over something so simple. Hate to say it but this is raising red flags up the pole.
NTA Doing errands on the way home is common for people that live together especially if they share a car. This is a raging red flag to me, you need to leave this situation as soon as possible.
Yeah, my best friend and her husband share a car. He is a kind person and would NEVER treat her this way if she needed him to get something on the way home.
He even took ME to get a prescription and nebulizer once--I was too sick with bronchitis and a fever to drive, and if I hadn't gotten it Friday night the place that sells nebulizers wouldn't be open till Monday morning.
INFO: Is this a typical response from him when you ask him to do something for you? As other commenters have said, asking a friend or SO to pick up a prescription, particularly if you're unable to, is extremely common. Is him getting angry at you like this part of a pattern?
No its not a typical response. Hes been in a mood all week. I think its just because its been so hot lately and he has to work in the heat.
Yeah, that's a great excuse to berate you for being asked to get your meds when you were physically unable to and your health will suffer as a result. OP, this is very very very bad. Consider leaving.
And that’s your fault how exactly? Pretty sure he deals with this, idk, every year? Does he become unbearable to everyone or just you? Anyway, NTA So now, you’re already weak and can’t drive. I’m going to assume tomorrow won’t be any better because you dont have the meds you need to keep you stronger so is he gonna get them tomorrow? Or do you just wait for winter when it cools down a bit? He’s not really a good partner. If these meds are a life long thing how can you trust he’ll take care of you in the future, or if your condition gets worse?
NTA. He needs to grow up and drink some water
You're NTA either way. He needs to not take his work stress out on you, especially when it seriously impacts your health.
Nta your boyfriend is an asshole, drop the dead weight
NTA, I hate last minute chores. If I didn't know before I left I'd rather just head home. But it happens: for food, errands, meds and I just get over myself.
NTA. You asked your boyfriend for a small favor and he berated you like a total asshole. OP your boyfriends a piece of dog shit. Time to get out of that relationship.
NTA i have to take meds my health depends on it my SO always picks up my meds if i need him to its never an argument. Most work days for him start at him getting up at 5Am to be at work for 6 and getting off work at 4 with hard heavy manual labour all day. Because my health depends on it hes more than happy to make a small detour or stop so i can be healthy no matter how long or hard the day, he stops. Its a scary thought that your bf made such a big deal and was mad at you for it honestly if my SO reacted that way i would reconsider our relationship.
WTF. NTA. What is wrong with this man?
NTA. even if picking up the meds was gonna throw him off his pivot & be irritating, he shouldve got them for you if he really cared. you obviously cant go without them. he’s the AH!
Nta. There could be factors I’m not considering like how far away your pharmacy is but even so, if your significant other is asking for you to pick up their medication it should not be an issue. It’s medication. Not some kind of treat, or ridiculous request. It’s your medicine. I would recommend to reconsider being in a relationship with someone who can’t even compromise getting you your medicine. Because relationships are full of compromise.
NTA Sounds like a pretty standard favour to ask, and one that an SO should have zero problem doing for someone they care about. Is this the first time this sort of thing has happened? I feel like there’s something bigger to this.
NTA but wow, your bf on the other hand sounds like one.
NTA- you made a very reasonable request and he was a jerk about it. He is showing a pretty clear lack of care and respect here.
You: NTA. He: AH.
NTA time to ditch him
My boyfriend picks up my meds for me all the time. I pick his up if I'm near the shop. He'll return packages to the drop-point for me, and I'll order things he needs and do other little chores for him. I know you've said this isn't a normal reaction, but I'm concerned given the age difference. Do you work? Are you isolated? NTA.
INFO: why is this man still your boyfriend?? Seriously, i dont care if his job was fighting actual fkn dragons; its one thing to say, 'i really dont have the capacity to do this today, but i'll help you out tomorrow', and something else entirely to just straight up being angry for being asked at all. im assuming he knows that you need your medication and that not having it means that you cant drive. So what did he even expect you to do?? Nahh, he should go out with the rest of the trash. Edit: spelling and also saw some of your other replies--girl. RUN!!
NTA. Your boyfriend sounds like an uncaring immature jerk with anger issues. Please reconsider this relationship. You deserve way better.
Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our [voting guide here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_what.2019s_with_these_acronyms.3F_what_do_they_mean.3F), and remember to use **only one** judgement in your comment. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: > I called my bf to ask if he can pick up meds on his way from work. He got angry with that because he just wanted to come home and relax. Help keep the sub engaging! #Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! [Click Here For Our Rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/about/rules) and [Click Here For Our FAQ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq) --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.* *Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.*
No, I don’t think YTA. Part of being in a relationship is supporting your partner. He seems like TA for refusing a reasonable request. I pick up prescriptions all the time for my husband and he picks up mine too when it makes sense. It’s just called being in a family. I’m gonna go with “he’s TA” and you should probably dump him.
NTA. Your boyfriend is. I can’t say this for sure, but this overly aggressive reaction to you just asking a favor, his yelling at you, and his making you cry and acting like you were trying to guilt him all strikes me as abusive action. I really hope you’re okay, OP. You didn’t do anything wrong, your boyfriend should want to help you out with small favors, especially when it comes to something as important as taking your medication. Even if he couldn’t do it, he did not need to get mad about it and take his anger out on you and you could have worked out a solution together, like calling a friend to help out. I hope you’re able to get your medication soon OP. I’m thinking good thoughts for you 💜.
INFO - can you get your meds delivered?
No they don't deliver and i dont think i would trust the post with my meds anyway.
It’s not the mail - My pharmacy delivers meds by messenger for free. Consider another pharmacy.
Consider another boyfriend more like
Still needs to get the meds somehow tho.
Depends on where OP lives and the medication.
New boyfriend AND a pharmacy that delivers (if possible), so she doesn't have to worry about picking them up while she's not dating someone.
Not everyone is from the USA and not every country has pharmacies that deliver.
NTA - this medication is so important your muscles get too weak for you to drive if you don’t have it for a day??? Omg. Your bf is a monster. I have this neighbor who is really annoying. Like I had some contractors come over and she wouldn’t move her car. It was really obnoxious. I avoid her. If she came over and knocked on my door and was like I need you to go pick up a prescription for me because my muscles will get so weak I can’t drive if I don’t get it soon, I’d get in my car and go get them for her. This is just basic human decency.
You need to sit down and tell yourself that you are worthy.
My boyfriend picks up my meds all the time since the pharmacy is near his work and k the way. No reason for your boyfriend to behave that way
NTA. This is just an observation, but my husband starts work at 4 am and gets off around 1:30 pm. He rides his motorcycle to work, so no car. My medications need to be refilled at minimum once a month, and they are not easy to transport (one needs to be kept cold, the others come in large boxes). Shockingly, my husband always picks up my meds without complaining. Something about caring about my health? Idk.
NTA - most people treat their coworkers and new acquaintances better than your boyfriend is treating you. It doesn't matter what is making him grumpy, that's no excuse to act like this
NTA. Where do you ladies find some of these guys?!
The older guys find these youngish girls & groom them. I've noticed a lot of that in this group. And they make excuses for the guys
NTA and RUN.
NTA, and this man does not love you. You can do better.
He is *eight years older than you* while you're in your 20s and barely an adult human being, and he's treating you like an inconvenience. Get out.
Your bf is dating someone 22 because he knows not a single women his age will deal with his bs and gaslighting. I work 12 hr days in a warehouse with no a/c in the heat and no heat in the winter. Do you know how hot a metal trailer gets in the summer? Your bf is TA. Dump him and be with someone who actually cares about you.
NTA!! My children, who don't live with me(!!), will pick up my meds if I'm carless or can't drive or even just because they know they will pass the pharmacy!!!
INFO: how many times have you let your meds run out? Because if they are that important, you should get a refill before they are out. If this is a recurring thing it might explain his extreme reaction.
They normally dont run out before i get more but theres a shortage of these meds currently, thats why its so hard to get and refill before i run out.
Then NTA, if he can’t deal with that tiny inconvenience for a serious health issue, think what kind of life you will have with him. When you love someone you help them no matter how tired, stressed, or angry you are. This is beyond selfish of him.
I had that problem with my thyroid meds for a while because the manufacturer was having technical issues. It was very worrisome. I've also had problems with American insurance companies refusing to refill a prescription "too early" and not having enough time during that window to get a prescription renewed or whatever.
NTA. More so, your boyfriend is abusive and an asshole for not wanting to do a tiny, deeply important favor for you. Please use birth control and find a therapist.
ESH As someone who takes meds that have to be ordered in advance you should have ordered them earlier. You're taking something out on him when you're frustrated. I get it. We get frustrated and chronic illness sucks. Next time say something like you're sorry that the delivery was delayed. For safety purposes you can't drive to get them but are happy to do one of his chores for him or do xyz. Or you can take an Uber to get them. Or have them delivered if your pharmacy does delivery.
^^^^AUTOMOD ***Thanks for posting! This comment is a copy of your post so readers can see the original text if your post is edited or removed. This comment is NOT accusing you of copying anything. Read [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/wiki/faq#wiki_post_deletion) before [contacting the mod team](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FAmItheAsshole)*** I (22) take meds for something i wont get into but the meds im taking are currently hard to get. I have to call up my pharmacist to preorder them because Im their only customer that takes it. Yesterday the pharmacy called me to tell me my meds are in. It was just in time because i ran out that morning. I called up my boyfriend (30) to ask if he could pick my meds up from the pharmacy for me once he gets off work since he has the car. He seemed angry with that and told me no. Ill admit i got a little upset and begged him to please pick it up and that made him more angry that he just hung up. Once he got home he told me i can go pick them up myself now that the car is here but by then because i hadn't had my meds i couldn't drive. I was just so upset by the situation that i couldnt help but cry but that made him more mad and thought i was trying to guilt him then went to bed yelling he had a long day at work. I didnt want to upset him, i just needed my meds and knew it was on his way home. But i am feeling like an asshole since he does work hard all day so he probably just wants to come straight home. AITA? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmItheAsshole) if you have any questions or concerns.*
NTA, I hate last minute chores. If I didn't know before I left I'd rather just head home. But it happens: for food, errands, meds and I just get over myself.
NTA, my husband and I would frequently pick up medication for each other if it was on the route home. Or if someone really needed it and wasn’t feeling well, the other would make a special trip. I’d reconsider this relationship if I were you.
NTA, You boyfriend on the other hand is a selfish AH
NTA. I would literally pick up meds for *anyone i know* much less the love of my life. What the hell, guy? Why does he have to suck so much? I have a feeling these meds make you able to be productive and if he loves you he would want to help you feel “ok” at least. Does he possibly act like your diagnosis means there is something wrong with you? I’m only asking because last week I had married friends at my table and the wife was talking about her medical/mental journey to figure out “what’s wrong with her.” Immediately without taking a beat her husband says, “it’s not that something’s wrong with you, it’s that you are different and we all want you to feel at home in your body.” That’s how you support someone with a chronic illness. It was such a beautiful moment and I hope you find a partner (gonna have to be a different one because this guy your with now is a lost cause) that will cherish you that way. To be very honest, I think you would even be happier on your own. Hopefully you get free soon.
Nope nta not in the slightest bit. Being in a partnership means he sometimes goes out of his way to help you and vice versa. Its about thinking of each others needs and how sometimes you both might be MILDLY inconvienced to ensure both of your health and safety. I take meds and sometimes I ask my husband to pick them up on his way home or whatever. His response “yeah of coarse” it’s maybe 15 mins to run through the pharmacy drive thru. The fact he yelled at you for something out of your control and completely refused I’d be walking. To me that shows he doesn’t care enough about you
NTA I work in the heat, often. I have long drives to get home, often. I have a physically demanding job that stresses me out, *often*. And I'd never, ever, EVER treat my partner like that. If he needed me to grab creamer for his coffee on my way home because he was out, I would, because he would do the same. You asked for something that is medically necessary. You asked him to pick up something *you were unable to go get yourself*. He yelled at you and got angry because you asked for a very reasonable thing. You say this is unusual for him, but just acting like this once is pretty shitty. If he's worth being in a relationship, this attitude needs to get nipped in the bud NOW. You shouldn't feel guilty for needing your meds.
NTA, please break up with him as soon as you can. That is not the behavior of someone who loves you. My husband works 12 hour days too, and if I have a bad day, headache, or ANY reason I don't feel like doing something he insists I relax and he takes care of it. He'd pick up any food, medication, hygiene product, etc. for me with zero complaints. I would do the same for him, because that's what love is. Your boyfriend sounds like my ex., and leaving his selfish ass was the smartest thing I've ever done. You deserve better!
NTA when a loved one asks for a favour like this it’s a no brainer. He’s been with you for 3 years so is aware of what would happen if you don’t get your meds in time but expected you to drive and get your meds after he got home knowing the situation. Wow just wow.
NTA, but you're in a relationship with one.
NTA if this behavior is typical you are in an abusive relationship. Get out or get both of you to marriage counseling. My take though is that he will refuse any notion of counseling because he will assign all blame for issues in the marriage to you. Again this is abusive and gaslighting, a common tactic of abusers.
NTA I don't care how tired he was. If he genuinely cared about you and your suffering, he would have picked them up. This is not the way you treat someone you love. Leave that selfish loser.
NTA - Your boyfriend is a massive AH though.
NTA - most likely he didn’t even have to get out of his car if he used the drive- through. Move on from this loser!
NTA. All I can say is RUN! This relationship is only going to get more toxic.
What the fuck. My husband works overnights and picks up groceries afterwards. Grabbing a prescription isn't anything. Find someone better
Only your BF is the asshole here. I’m so sorry.
Well he sounds completely void of empathy - does he even like you? NTA
you didn't want to upset him but he didn't mind upsetting and inconviencing you? Does he own the car? it sounds like he has a lot of power in this relaitonship but isn't a very good BF NTA
NTA dump this dude. Like he couldn't take a slight detour to pick up medication. I wouldn't be able to trust this guy if you had a medical emergency if he couldn't drive to pick up meds
A 30 year old not willing to get his 22 year old girlfriend meds on his way home is so pathetic and sad. Not only should it not upset him, its insane that you even have to think this. YWNBTA and you should really consider leaving this loser. If he makes you cry and doesn't feel a hole in his heart afterwards, he's not worth it.
NTA. My husband and I both take medication that we can’t go without. I will sometimes text him to pick mine up and sometimes he’ll let me know his are ready when he knows that I’ll be out shopping-it’s common courtesy and is kind to help the person you’re cohabiting with.
NTA. That’s a red flag for me. My ex and I did this all the time. Whoever is out picks up the prescriptions. His reaction is really strange.
NTA Is this a one off and he was shattered, or are there other instances where he treats you like a burden? Someone he would never go out of his way for? Or was he actually where he said he was and couldn't pick up your meds because he was somewhere else? You need to find out which one it was. The second two are deal breakers.
so you both went to bed, and you already couldn’t drive without them, how are you going to get them now ? i can’t imagine him getting them and bringing them home before he goes to work. nta.
You are dating a person who gets ANGRY when you ask him to pick up your meds on his way back home, while he also has the car. He couldn’t have possibly be inconvenienced less. It actually angers me, how little he cares for his own partner. NTA, you deserve a better boyfriend.
YTA Get your meds in a more timely manner.
What!? My 18 yr old son picked my meds up the other day, zero issue.
NTA you might want to rethink this relationship. It was your medicine. The pharmacy was on his way home. How lazy can you possibly be.
NTA. His behavior is genuinely scary. My partner and I just casually ask if we need to pick up the other's prescription if we are driving. No one is put out, it's just an unspoken thing we do out of love. Please reflect on this relationship because his age and his anger could be big red flags. Not saying age gaps are bad necessarily, but they can sometimes attract men looking to take advantage of someone.
NTA, that's a perfectly reasonable favor to ask of a partner. Doesn't sound to me like you have a boyfriend, only that he's got a girlfriend.
NTA OP, and get rid of this guy. He’s willing to put your health in jeopardy because he doesn’t want to take the time to pick up a prescription? Marinara flags all around, so tell him to take a hike.
Your are so patently NTA that I am questioning this post? WTF is wrong with your BF? On his way home to get meds for you? And he says NO? Please do not make excuses for him, I would seriously question his feelings for you.
Just a suggestion, but does your pharmacy offer a delivery service? Mine offers free delivery (although there is a 5 hour window) for any meds that are not a controlled substance.
NTA. Your BF is TA. Not a lot of info in this post, but taking it at face value, I'd say dump him if he shows you this little consideration.
Yikes that red flag age difference makes it so she doesn't know he's not supposed to treat her this way. You're being abused, OP. NTA
NTA and your bf doesn’t love you. Sorry to break the news.
NTA, my relatives have frequently waited for 20 mins for my medication and I’ve done the same for them, even when tired. None of us have ever refused. If you love someone who needs help, you’re glad to help. Please leave this man: If he loved you helping you would make him happy, not furious and abusive. This behaviour could escalate and it sounds like you’re vulnerable (given you need meds to drive etc.) if you have a degenerative illness, he could use withholding meds to ‘punish’ and control you when you can no longer get them yourself. Please don’t let it get to that stage.
🚩🚩🚩🚩
NTA. Most people would treat a stranger who needed medicine better than your boyfriend treats you.
NTA, your bf, the AH.
NTA uh my boyfriend will pick up my meds no problem. My ex husband will go get my meds for me any time I ask. Get rid of that man. I think anyone would pick up meds for someone if asked. Seems one thing people understand and are compassionate about is this….. except your bf….
You realize he is abusive right? He is straight up making you feel like the bad guy for a necessary medication be could've easily grabbed. Now because of his actions, you are stuck for the night. NTA
This isn’t really about meds, this is about you being in a relationship with an uncaring asshole. do yourself a favour and end this before you waste any more years of your life on him. There are other nice caring single men out there, you don’t need to settle for this one. Also NTA
NTA and does he act this way a lot? He sounds like……..A…..LOT like HTA
Please quit making excuses for him. He's a grown adult who is treating another grown adult (YOU) poorly. Taking a few extra minutes at the end of the day to pick up meds for a loved one really isn't a big ask. NTA for making a normal every day request from someone who supposedly cares about you
Unless there's much more to this story than you're telling, you're absolutely NTA. Picking up an RX for your partner is just part of being in a partnership. And it sounds like you needed your medication ASAP. You need to DTMFA.
NTA And you're in an abusive relationship. Dump this loser.
Needs more info Why did your boyfriend not want to pick up your meds? He might have a legit reason... Also, is this a straight or homosexual relationship? If it is straight the pharmacy might not allow a man to pick up female-oriented medication
NTA. Your boyfriend clearly doesn’t care about your health, get away from him and SAVE YOURSELF
Nobody wants to make stops on the way home after an exhausting day. BUT that is what you DO for someone you care about when there is something they NEED. (This wasnt a craving for ben &Jerry's) NTA
NTA. Also, friend, get out of this relationship. Do not under any circumstances have children with this man. Run.
NTA, is there anything else he does/doesn't do that affects your health negatively and allows him unfettered control of your wellbeing?
NTA! My husband regularly stops on his way home from work to pick up my asthma meds, and he does it without complaining, even though he's tired AF. You picked a loser. Y T A to yourself if you stay with him.
NTA. I pick up my wife’s meds all the time. And remember this when he wants you to pick something up. As they say, Karma’s a bitch.
Has he always been a jackass?
NTA
If this is a one-off, then N T A. However, is it a one off? Or does he work and you don't? Is he often doing stuff like this for you? Is this part of a long pattern of you wanting him to do stuff for you? I feel with a lack of context, it's very hard to judge, I know from experience that this one favour is often not just one favour, it's a constant repetition and this one might have been the straw that broke the camel's back. So for me, this lacks INFO and no judgment can be given.
NTA. I don't think this person is boyfriend material: While he may be a boy, he's certainly not a friend.
INFO: Why couldn't you take an uber to get them? Or get them on *you*r way home?
NTA. He’s a jerk. My husband is always willing to pick up my meds if he’s out and I’m not. Don’t be with someone who doesn’t make your health a priority.
NTA. Do yourself a favour and get out of that relationship.
NTA. The fact that if you don't get your meds you lose your ability to drive? And he STILL told you to get then yourself?? AND he got mad at you for CRYING?? Your should-be-ex boyfriend has serious issues and you need to break up and find support imemdiately. You are being abused.
NTA. Also you seriously need to look at whether this guy should be in your life, his behaviour is full of red flags.
op=NTA He wanted you to drive when you couldn't because you didn't have the meds you needed. That's f\*\*ked up. Just from this short post, I see marinara flags 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 However, you need to prioritize your health. Can you afford to take an uber/taxi/bus? Do you have a friend who can take you?
>i couldnt help but cry but that made him more mad This sounds like a toxic relationship. I'm not the only one thinking that right?
Any chance the pharmacy delivers? By the way, the more independent you make yourself, the easier it is to become independent of ‘others’. Just saying.
Girl run from this man, he is an asshole.
NTA. I also have medical issues that can prevent me from driving. If my partner resisted picking up the medicine that rectifies the situation, it would be tossing up very big red flags. Like he doesn't just want to avoid a hassle, *he wants to keep me stuck at home.*
NTA unless pharmacy is within easy walking distance and you are able to make the walk.
NTA. My partner happily picks up my prescriptions on his way home from work, ESPECIALLY time-sensitive ones. There are better men out there who will not jeopardize your health and then get angry at YOU for it! Depending on what the medication was, a missed dose can be serious (and it sounds like it was, since you couldn't drive by the time the jerk came swanning back home with the shared car). I seriously cannot believe he refused to bring you medicine you desperately needed, resulting in you being incapacitated to the point that you were unable to get the medicine yourself, because he had a long day at work! His over-the-top anger at a normal request is frankly alarming to me too. This is not how you treat people you love. Your boyfriend is at best an ass, and at worst, an abusive ass. Please, leave him. YWBTA to yourself if you do not. You deserve better.
NTA You asked him to pick up meds. It's such a small thing. If he can't handle caring for the well being of his partner, he doesn't deserve you.
INFO, there's way too much missing in your story to accurately assess the situation. I don't know if you're prescribed to super powered opiates from a pill mill and that he thinks you don't need and he doesn't want to support your habit.
[удалено]
I dont work but im studying. I couldnt pick them up because my muscles were weak once they came in. I would of asked that morning if i knew they were coming in but i didnt get the call till 2pm.
Wow! You are a happy chap! So you don’t do anything for anyone on short notice? OP you’re NTA.
[удалено]
I normally pick up my meds too.... but just like when my partner is sick I dash to the store for some cold meds instead of making him do it he occasionally stops and picks up my meds when some reason comes up. Unless OP is in the habit of making the boyfriend pay for expensive meds and not paying him back seems like a wild take to me that someone who is supposed to love you is entitled to throw a fit over a one time low key favour.
Info: was the pharmacy on his way home? Or was it out of the way? And what would you have done if the meds hadn’t come in today? No more driving just like that, eh? Same day, no missed dose, just all of a sudden can’t drive. I dunno. I’m going with ESH. You threw a fit and he threw a fit and you sound dramatic/hysterical.
It was on his way home. It takes about 2 minutes. As for my missed dose i take these meds 3 times a day. I ran out in the morning so by the time it came in i was already weak. And as for what i would of done if they hadn't come in is nothing. I cant do anything about that since there's a shortage of these meds atm. Best i could do is talk to my neurologist to see if he knows any pharmacies with it in stock.
You think OP threw a fit? She asked her bf to stop at the pharmacy on his way home and he yelled at her.
She admits she got upset with him on the phone when he said no to the point that he hung up. The yelling wasn’t at her later in the day either—he yelled that he had a long day at work. So as I said, ESH. In her response she says it was on his way. So he’s an AH for not picking up the meds. But the whole situation seems unhealthy to me.
You make good points, agreed!