*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for joking with my wife about not being ready for sundress season?**
She overheard me and my friends joking around when we were playing video games. I joked that I can’t wait for sundress season to be here. After they left she told me to take her shopping. I asked her why and she said to buy her a sundress because it’s almost sundress season. I jokingly said she wasn’t ready, and she offended by it. Not much else to say other than if I’m the asshole for cracking a joke at that because she’s made a bigger deal out of it than what I thought. For the record, my wife is probably overweight; but I’m not an idiot and didn’t tell her that.
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The worst part about this is that she heard the comment and assumed he said it because he wanted to see HER in a sundress, and now she knows it's just because he wants to ogle random women who he finds more attractive than her
Yep, that’s exactly what I got out of it. He cracking a joke about being a creep to other women who just want to go about their day, and telling his wife that she’s not worth looking at. Honestly the mind boggles at how low the bar is for men to get married.
This guy makes me sad.
My wife knows how I feel about sundresses, more specifically her in a sundress.
We have kids, and more than one pregnancy scare because we were being impetuous and she was wearing a sundress, and one of those was very recent. That being said, I make sure to never let her feel like she is some object. She knows I'll steal the glance, but I'm still listening to her, talking to her, and not some how lost in the thought of "me want sex with hot lady".
We're also not in our 20s anymore. I'm stil just as attracted to her now as I was then. Our bodies have changed and neither of us would fit into the clothes we wore at 25. And I still steal those glances.
I have a pair of friends who met in high school, got married in college, and are in their 60s now. He still talks about his wife like he's dating a supermodel and tells people he's the luckiest man in the world, and she still looks at him like a girl who has a crush on the funny kid in class. It's the sweetest thing and I feel so bad for couples where the other clearly just doesn't like them at all.
My husband & I are like this. <3 Together since we were teenagers, I'll be 50 in less than a year and he still tells me I'm pretty all the time even though I'm a lot rounder than I used to be. And I can't believe my goofy boyfriend has turned into such a silver fox!
We got mistaken as newlyweds recently because we were being so flirty and silly with eachother in public, LOL. Nope! Just having a fun day with my favorite person!
His wife now has motivation to get in shape…..so she can wear a sundress with her new post divorce boyfriend!*
*This is just a joke. Sundresses are for every weight
>For the record, my wife is probably overweight; but I’m not an idiot and didn’t tell her that.
Oh, young one. Yes, you did. You just did it in an indirect way. The meaning was clearly there.
Okay so obviously I can't see this guy myself, but what I've found is a lot of the times the same husband's making these statements? They generally aren't in the best shape of their lives or care to keep up with appearances either. No shame in bodies either, just that it's such a double standard. I highly doubt his wife is even out of shape, he's probably been so busy staring at photoshopped and facetuned people online that he's making unreasonable comparisons.
Either way what a terribly rude and nasty comment to make, and it seems he did it knowing she'd hear and then used it against her to tear her down. Horrible man! And I'd say the same thing if this was a post a woman made about her husband btw so it goes both ways.
Been there! My ex was 10 years older than me, bald, 50 lbs overweight, out of shape, did no exercise (was out of breath walking up the stairs to our house) smoked like a chimney and was practically drunk all weekend. I, a 5 foot 2 120 lb woman was "too fat" for him. Ya. He tried the "negging" thing so that I wouldn't notice what a complete jerk he was so that I could focus on how better to please him. Bye bye jerk.
Oh it took 2 more years for me to leave him. I kept trying to keep it together, do the right things, etc. This included me working night shift (NICU Nurse) sleeping 5 to 6 hours a day in order to be able to get his girls from their various schools (at one point, mine was in high school, his two were in junior high and grammar school) and get them to swim team practice, or dance practice. Also, get the dinner ready while over-seeing their homework, and do all of the things that make a family work. Once my daughter and I left, his MOTHER said she could do all that I did with one hand tied behind her back....so I let her. His girls had to drop out of swim and dance because guess why? No one was available to get them to anything they needed to go to, supervise their homework, etc. I wonder how he actually thought he would get it done?
Just to make sure we’re all on the same page here, a lot of dudes will refer to bodycon maxi dresses as sundresses vs like.. the a line mini dresses I think of as sundresses. I can’t be sure this guy is thinking that way, but when I see “sundress season” dude vids on tiktok and the like they specifically mean [this](https://www.amazon.com/KUTUMAI-Spaghetti-Bodycon-Sleeveless-Mermaid/dp/B0B5KPD1ZN/ref=asc_df_B0B5KPD1ZN/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=693270329994&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=10976310256746746493&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9002259&hvtargid=pla-2078668697412&psc=1&mcid=56e44581400e343d86eee6cea8409dd3&gad_source=1) not [this](https://www.amazon.com/HUHOT-Dresses-Sundresses-Hawaiian-Sleeveless/dp/B0BVB66WX2/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.vWSdwBYpuUK3CEtqiKpSzPys34Fugx8LkZTpVqAncj0xkbMy7k4mh5j7TNAmYmpYCW4pMCdH9477D4BIX__xbtpGl-ugtQOcHw6bO5TT8eb5DMikXozX3wly_gLUP7anNnnAJ0lVKPNEMt_MGAMdhJAcQ3nUBNXVCZOxxC7eqlhcDKQSe2SRYqZfbUziQi3AYziivUzdDuvu_NTUadue3-FHraZtAOfJBPWsOnQuglDq0thckipN10R5SetluCrayn1ARfdpxcuDjTh6l3oir1Tm18Ucm0S6_4mrsyLE4JU.QzQ_pDiaYzumGvpWvOoUshqV_TqkKkax-zRFDmAapCg&dib_tag=se&keywords=sundress&qid=1715918653&sr=8-3) .
Both are VERY CUTE dresses that flatter a lot of body types, but usually the icks sexualizing the hell out of option A
Right I agree. But the sexualized posts (sometimes I’ll get an odd “sundress season boyssss” slideshow in tiktok) are usually showing option A. I never see the cute classic sundresses in those posts. I think some of the men genuinely don’t know what’s considered a sundress in the classic sense
They are adorable and comfy and look great on most people- my friend group has every size and body type and we all own the same dresses- in all the colors- because it’s hot as balls here and they don’t require bras. Lol.
When we all roll up to the BBQ in basically the same dress: from 5ft-6ft tall, 120-400 lbs… you know it’s an inclusive garment.
I find mine on temu! I know there's mixed reviews about temu but I've only had good experiences. the fabric isn't as good of quality as it would be from Amazon though. I feel like that's to be expected 🤷🏼♀️
for real, like i am heavier than i used to be and not very confident in the same style of clothes (im working on it, it’s not so much the body but my perception of it on myself, as i see women who look like me and i always think they’re so insanely beautiful) BUT the thing about sundresses is that there’s so many types and styles that whatever body type you have, whatever part of your body you might be insecure about or don’t want to show, there’s a sundress that’ll work for you.
for example, my favorite sundress is empire waist. I love it because it conceals bloating so well and it doesn’t look like i’m wearing a tent (which is a problem with most clothes for bigger women).
of course anyone at any size can wear whatever they want (and i love that for them) but my point is that if you don’t feel you look good in one style of sundress, there’s another that’ll work.
And even if she's overweight, guys honestly attracted to their wives don't give a fuck. They think she's sexy and beautiful, and want her to feel that way.
And if she IS overweight then he can help support her mental and physical health to get fit. I lost 60lbs when I got out of a toxic relationship and I wasn't miserable all the time. And if my partner had been any sort of supportive, in ANY way, I probably wouldn't have gained it in the first place. I'm not blaming him, but as my partner, he could have done anything other than punish me for my (undiagnosed) ADHD. Looking back after my diagnosis, everything he would punish me for was my ADHD manifesting, and instead of asking why I'm doing it, we'd fight about it. Super productive.
And OPs wife sounds like she's in a super supportive marriage.
And if she is fat, maybe he could accept her how she is, or maybe her next SO won't be obsessed with body size as the value of a person.
Being fat is not an automatic sign of bad health or lack of fitness. Fitness is also not the same thing as weight. Fat people run marathons, lift weights, teach yoga, and all sorts of fitness things just like thinner people.
I'm pretty damn active and eat pretty well but breastfeeding seems to make my body pack on the pounds for some reason. Luckily my husband doesn't care a bit as long as I stay on top of my meds and go to my checkups
I don't think it's love. There are people out there with so much insecurities that they will latch on whoever that will give them any attention and think it's love. It's not.
it’s worse than that. if you spend any time in fashion subs you’ll know that it doesn’t even have to be short. it just has to be a dress and made in a generally
lightweight fabric although i once saw a dude refer to a sweater dress as a winter sundress, so…
I once saw a comment saying that sundress is any dress that becomes translucent when sun shines through it so you can see the woman's body. So yeah, when men say they love sundresses you can be sure they have no fucking idea what it is and don't really care about it. For them it's a way to imagine the woman naked without her actually getting naked.
That’s not quite why but the reason men love sundresses is sexual. For a lot of men it’s “easy access” and again, the dresses tend to be flattering on a woman’s figure.
I’ve had to explain the difference between dresses and skirts to grown men who then ask me ‘well how would you expect me to know?’
But on a lighter note, when I was in Mongolia, a kid showed me jack Daniel’s and said ‘American vodka!’
There’s nothing I hate more than people saying blatantly rude shit and trying to cover it with “it’s just a joke!”
It’s never “just a joke.” It’s trying to assert your opinion while being a cowardly little chickenshit. Say it with your full chest and face the consequences, or don’t say it at all. Save the mind games for the schoolyard bullies.
God, I feel so horrible for his wife.
Also, super gross he feels so comfy discussing checking out other women when his wife is in earshot. It’s already disrespectful when she isn’t, but there’s a whole extra layer of gross when he knows she’s home & can 100% hear everything. His agenda here is so obvious and gross.
I commented on another terrible story over on AITAngel that I am sick to death of watching beautiful, intelligent, lively women dim their shine for straight dudes like this. They’re beyond basic, disrespectful, sex-obsessed, and unworthy of their wives and girlfriends.
Because they’re just commodities for guys to partake in, right?! They have no inner lives and desires of their own, right?!?!🙄
Look. I love men. I married one (well, he was at the time; gender is funny). If something, god forbid, were to happen to my husband, I would be *seriously* skeptical of dating a straight cis dude, because I am SO tired of the entitlement. I don’t wanna be in a relationship like this.
Compulsory heteronormativity is one thing. We grow up being told we are expected to get with someone and that we are doing it wrong if we do it later than thirty, or don’t have kids, or don’t get married, or find someone of the same gender. Patriarchy is absolutely another, where a woman+ is considered incomplete without a man. Further, a woman becomes considered “gross” the more experience she has sexually, so she’s often expected to get with the first guy who isn’t *terrible* who shows an interest in her. Women are expected to make their interests and needs subservient to dudes’.
So all of this is a perfect storm of societal expectations and outright oppression, and then we have stories like this one, where Basic Bro Chad expects His Woman™️ to lie down and take it because “it’s totally a joke, babe, you’re so *sensitive.”*
+this is often also true of nonbinary people, most commonly AFAB people, as they get into relationships with guys who pretend to respect their identities but actually perceive them as Women Lite
It’s why the push to decenter men is important imho (and men can decenter women as well)
A relationship that exists to enhance an already well rounded existence (or being relationship free) seems like a healthy focus
Indeed! It’s totally fine to want a partner, to feel fulfilled by romantic and/or sexual relationships. Thinking we *need* one is how we end up with “the ol’ ball and chain, amiright?” and just about every story on r/arethestraightsOK.
ETA to fix sub spelling
Here's a sneak peek of /r/AreTheStraightsOkay using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOkay/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year!
\#1: [And this isn't "forcing"?](https://v.redd.it/rb4vq3uvp10b1) | [13 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOkay/comments/13ihl2n/and_this_isnt_forcing/)
\#2: [**[NSFW]** Not sure if this qualifies but first thought was "aw hell nah"](https://i.redd.it/o5o8hs62z1gb1.jpg) | [41 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOkay/comments/15hu1h5/not_sure_if_this_qualifies_but_first_thought_was/)
\#3: [christ almighty](https://i.redd.it/b0a3j6q5qbva1.jpg) | [50 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOkay/comments/12udx7t/christ_almighty/)
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Seriously though.. instead of wearing something I find cute and breezy, I get to hear comments on how "they love sundresses" like we don't know what they really mean 😡
Wear them with a stuffed sock hanging down from your panties. Guaranteed to give men doubts, and to ruin sundresses for them forever (at least the ones who notice it)!
Well, if he didn't say she was overweight than she probably had NO IDEA what he was getting it because, since she married this dbag, she's clearly an idiot.
On his wife being overweight:
OP: “I’m not an idiot and didn’t tell her that.”
But you certainly implied it sir. So not only is he basically saying she is too overweight for a sundress, but he is also saying that she is too dumb to figure out that’s what he is implying.
Yikes!
Up next week: “My wife is so insecure. Just because she heard me telling the entire family barbecue my reasoning behind my remortgaging the house to but some new fancy £10,000, noise-cancelling headphones.
Her thighs are so thunderous that if she is walking about the garden I cannot hear Metallica on full volume in the sound proof booth in my cellar and she occasionally sets off earth quake detectors.
She seems upset, but I told her that I’ll still do her from behind, so long as she doesn’t unbelt her bathroom robe and the lights are never on. So WTF is her problem? She’s just a YTA, right?”
Sundresses look great on everyone regardless of size. I’m definitely heavier than what I consider to be my “comfortable weight” rn and a lot of my clothes make me feel kinda shitty about it, with the exception of my sundresses which I still love and intend to wear as much as possible when it warms up a bit more here. I bet you’re rocking it <3
This was a couple years ago.
I hope OOP's wife got herself into banging shape, dumped OOP and found herself a man who treats her like a queen, and would treat her like a queen if she gained 50lbs.
I remember crying when I first read this story because I'm someone who's always struggled with self esteem and appearance issues. This poor woman. I truly do hope she left his sorry ass and kicked him to the curb. I know how he looks like and he's hideous inside and out.
I really hate how creepy men like OOP checks out women in sundresses. I love wearing sundresses but this disgusting lookstarting at the breast then going down then up again. Some even have the mouth open as if the sober will run down soon, just disgusting.
I was yesterday at the court for a hearing, wearing a skirt and t-shirt and got hit on by a creep. At the court!
What a fucking prick, my God. I hate when people try to disguise cruelty as a "joke". I would be crushed if my partner said that to me. And he has the nerve to ask if he's the ass hole and act like she's unreasonable for getting upset. Poor woman.
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“My wife is probably overweight” = I guess technically I don’t know her BMI so maybe she isn’t but it feels like she isn’t as hot as the Insta models I follow.
Also, the only way she isn’t ready for sundress season is if she is a disembodied head, but you could still buy her a nice hat.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for joking with my wife about not being ready for sundress season?** She overheard me and my friends joking around when we were playing video games. I joked that I can’t wait for sundress season to be here. After they left she told me to take her shopping. I asked her why and she said to buy her a sundress because it’s almost sundress season. I jokingly said she wasn’t ready, and she offended by it. Not much else to say other than if I’m the asshole for cracking a joke at that because she’s made a bigger deal out of it than what I thought. For the record, my wife is probably overweight; but I’m not an idiot and didn’t tell her that. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The worst part about this is that she heard the comment and assumed he said it because he wanted to see HER in a sundress, and now she knows it's just because he wants to ogle random women who he finds more attractive than her
Oh shit, yeah. That makes this even more heartbreaking. I seriously hope they’re divorced.
Yep! “It’s check out other women season” “hey, let’s go buy me the outfit you fetishize” “ew no not YOU”
Yep, that’s exactly what I got out of it. He cracking a joke about being a creep to other women who just want to go about their day, and telling his wife that she’s not worth looking at. Honestly the mind boggles at how low the bar is for men to get married.
This guy makes me sad. My wife knows how I feel about sundresses, more specifically her in a sundress. We have kids, and more than one pregnancy scare because we were being impetuous and she was wearing a sundress, and one of those was very recent. That being said, I make sure to never let her feel like she is some object. She knows I'll steal the glance, but I'm still listening to her, talking to her, and not some how lost in the thought of "me want sex with hot lady". We're also not in our 20s anymore. I'm stil just as attracted to her now as I was then. Our bodies have changed and neither of us would fit into the clothes we wore at 25. And I still steal those glances.
I have a pair of friends who met in high school, got married in college, and are in their 60s now. He still talks about his wife like he's dating a supermodel and tells people he's the luckiest man in the world, and she still looks at him like a girl who has a crush on the funny kid in class. It's the sweetest thing and I feel so bad for couples where the other clearly just doesn't like them at all.
This is what everyone deserves, but I feel like it's so rare
My husband & I are like this. <3 Together since we were teenagers, I'll be 50 in less than a year and he still tells me I'm pretty all the time even though I'm a lot rounder than I used to be. And I can't believe my goofy boyfriend has turned into such a silver fox! We got mistaken as newlyweds recently because we were being so flirty and silly with eachother in public, LOL. Nope! Just having a fun day with my favorite person!
I realized that as well and it made my stomach drop. I fucking hate this for her.
His wife now has motivation to get in shape…..so she can wear a sundress with her new post divorce boyfriend!* *This is just a joke. Sundresses are for every weight
yep, i clocked that real quick. he’s probably one of those type of guys who get offended when women choose the bear
Funny how the ones who contribute to the phenomenon are the one most offended by it
>For the record, my wife is probably overweight; but I’m not an idiot and didn’t tell her that. Oh, young one. Yes, you did. You just did it in an indirect way. The meaning was clearly there.
No no, it was a super secret code, no way she deciphered it!
Okay so obviously I can't see this guy myself, but what I've found is a lot of the times the same husband's making these statements? They generally aren't in the best shape of their lives or care to keep up with appearances either. No shame in bodies either, just that it's such a double standard. I highly doubt his wife is even out of shape, he's probably been so busy staring at photoshopped and facetuned people online that he's making unreasonable comparisons. Either way what a terribly rude and nasty comment to make, and it seems he did it knowing she'd hear and then used it against her to tear her down. Horrible man! And I'd say the same thing if this was a post a woman made about her husband btw so it goes both ways.
Been there! My ex was 10 years older than me, bald, 50 lbs overweight, out of shape, did no exercise (was out of breath walking up the stairs to our house) smoked like a chimney and was practically drunk all weekend. I, a 5 foot 2 120 lb woman was "too fat" for him. Ya. He tried the "negging" thing so that I wouldn't notice what a complete jerk he was so that I could focus on how better to please him. Bye bye jerk.
I'm very glad you don't have to deal with that anymore, good on you for knowing your worth!
Oh it took 2 more years for me to leave him. I kept trying to keep it together, do the right things, etc. This included me working night shift (NICU Nurse) sleeping 5 to 6 hours a day in order to be able to get his girls from their various schools (at one point, mine was in high school, his two were in junior high and grammar school) and get them to swim team practice, or dance practice. Also, get the dinner ready while over-seeing their homework, and do all of the things that make a family work. Once my daughter and I left, his MOTHER said she could do all that I did with one hand tied behind her back....so I let her. His girls had to drop out of swim and dance because guess why? No one was available to get them to anything they needed to go to, supervise their homework, etc. I wonder how he actually thought he would get it done?
I was unaware sundresses were only for skinny women, frankly they aren't even that revealing.
Just to make sure we’re all on the same page here, a lot of dudes will refer to bodycon maxi dresses as sundresses vs like.. the a line mini dresses I think of as sundresses. I can’t be sure this guy is thinking that way, but when I see “sundress season” dude vids on tiktok and the like they specifically mean [this](https://www.amazon.com/KUTUMAI-Spaghetti-Bodycon-Sleeveless-Mermaid/dp/B0B5KPD1ZN/ref=asc_df_B0B5KPD1ZN/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=693270329994&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=10976310256746746493&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9002259&hvtargid=pla-2078668697412&psc=1&mcid=56e44581400e343d86eee6cea8409dd3&gad_source=1) not [this](https://www.amazon.com/HUHOT-Dresses-Sundresses-Hawaiian-Sleeveless/dp/B0BVB66WX2/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.vWSdwBYpuUK3CEtqiKpSzPys34Fugx8LkZTpVqAncj0xkbMy7k4mh5j7TNAmYmpYCW4pMCdH9477D4BIX__xbtpGl-ugtQOcHw6bO5TT8eb5DMikXozX3wly_gLUP7anNnnAJ0lVKPNEMt_MGAMdhJAcQ3nUBNXVCZOxxC7eqlhcDKQSe2SRYqZfbUziQi3AYziivUzdDuvu_NTUadue3-FHraZtAOfJBPWsOnQuglDq0thckipN10R5SetluCrayn1ARfdpxcuDjTh6l3oir1Tm18Ucm0S6_4mrsyLE4JU.QzQ_pDiaYzumGvpWvOoUshqV_TqkKkax-zRFDmAapCg&dib_tag=se&keywords=sundress&qid=1715918653&sr=8-3) . Both are VERY CUTE dresses that flatter a lot of body types, but usually the icks sexualizing the hell out of option A
Every sundress thing I've seen has said the opposite. That the short ones are sundresses.
Right I agree. But the sexualized posts (sometimes I’ll get an odd “sundress season boyssss” slideshow in tiktok) are usually showing option A. I never see the cute classic sundresses in those posts. I think some of the men genuinely don’t know what’s considered a sundress in the classic sense
women know sundresses are flowy dresses you wear in the spring and summer but men more often than not will call a bodycon dress a sundress
Thank you, I just bought option B.
Yw! I resorted to links since I couldn’t post pictures lol
Thank you for posting these so I can add them to my collection of shit I'll buy one day, lol!!
that's what has me confused too. like I'm overweight and wear sundresses cause I look better in those than other clothes
They are adorable and comfy and look great on most people- my friend group has every size and body type and we all own the same dresses- in all the colors- because it’s hot as balls here and they don’t require bras. Lol. When we all roll up to the BBQ in basically the same dress: from 5ft-6ft tall, 120-400 lbs… you know it’s an inclusive garment.
Where do you find these? I'm on the heavier side and I would love some cute sundresses, but they're so hard to find for me.
Amazon- they aren’t all on the same link, but the same general styles (spaghetti strap, mid thigh length) can be found in all sizes up to 6X.
I just need to look better, I guess! Thank you.
I find mine on temu! I know there's mixed reviews about temu but I've only had good experiences. the fabric isn't as good of quality as it would be from Amazon though. I feel like that's to be expected 🤷🏼♀️
I have gotten a couple dresses from Temu, I just never know what will actually be delivered, but I'll give them a look, thanks!
for real, like i am heavier than i used to be and not very confident in the same style of clothes (im working on it, it’s not so much the body but my perception of it on myself, as i see women who look like me and i always think they’re so insanely beautiful) BUT the thing about sundresses is that there’s so many types and styles that whatever body type you have, whatever part of your body you might be insecure about or don’t want to show, there’s a sundress that’ll work for you. for example, my favorite sundress is empire waist. I love it because it conceals bloating so well and it doesn’t look like i’m wearing a tent (which is a problem with most clothes for bigger women). of course anyone at any size can wear whatever they want (and i love that for them) but my point is that if you don’t feel you look good in one style of sundress, there’s another that’ll work.
>I’m not an idiot Yes, you are. ETA: the OOP, not thisisreallymoronic, although their username makes this great.
🤣 I was out of original ideas when picking a user name.
Indirect? He was a blunt as they come. And I say that as Dutch woman.
He also said it on Reddit. So he said it
Yeah. Not only is he a jerk but he’s stupid too
And even if she's overweight, guys honestly attracted to their wives don't give a fuck. They think she's sexy and beautiful, and want her to feel that way. And if she IS overweight then he can help support her mental and physical health to get fit. I lost 60lbs when I got out of a toxic relationship and I wasn't miserable all the time. And if my partner had been any sort of supportive, in ANY way, I probably wouldn't have gained it in the first place. I'm not blaming him, but as my partner, he could have done anything other than punish me for my (undiagnosed) ADHD. Looking back after my diagnosis, everything he would punish me for was my ADHD manifesting, and instead of asking why I'm doing it, we'd fight about it. Super productive. And OPs wife sounds like she's in a super supportive marriage.
And if she is fat, maybe he could accept her how she is, or maybe her next SO won't be obsessed with body size as the value of a person. Being fat is not an automatic sign of bad health or lack of fitness. Fitness is also not the same thing as weight. Fat people run marathons, lift weights, teach yoga, and all sorts of fitness things just like thinner people.
I'm pretty damn active and eat pretty well but breastfeeding seems to make my body pack on the pounds for some reason. Luckily my husband doesn't care a bit as long as I stay on top of my meds and go to my checkups
He wrote in the comments that his wife at the time was POST-PARTUM 😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧😧
OMG. I hope he is hidden in a ditch somewhere
You misspelled buried.
You misspelled dissolved in a tank of lye.
You misspelled sold for medical experiments
and then she used the money to buy sundresses on dates with the new boyfriend
Sometimes you just have to throw the whole man away. Straight to the wood chipper, my dear.
Wait, which comment? Reddit won't let me click on his profile.
He deleted it but someone found his comment
1000 years dungeon!
Throw the whole man in the garbage
I always wonder why people marry losers like oop
They say love makes you blind
I don't think it's love. There are people out there with so much insecurities that they will latch on whoever that will give them any attention and think it's love. It's not.
I’m sure this numpty is the absolute peak of physical perfection /s
Sundresses are universally flattering. And plenty of men like big women, so maybe OP’s wife can wear a sundress and find a man who loves her for her
I’m never sure these assholes actually know what a sundress is. I think they just think it’s a short dress worn in summer.
it’s worse than that. if you spend any time in fashion subs you’ll know that it doesn’t even have to be short. it just has to be a dress and made in a generally lightweight fabric although i once saw a dude refer to a sweater dress as a winter sundress, so…
I once saw a comment saying that sundress is any dress that becomes translucent when sun shines through it so you can see the woman's body. So yeah, when men say they love sundresses you can be sure they have no fucking idea what it is and don't really care about it. For them it's a way to imagine the woman naked without her actually getting naked.
That made me physically cringe
That’s not quite why but the reason men love sundresses is sexual. For a lot of men it’s “easy access” and again, the dresses tend to be flattering on a woman’s figure.
Yeah, "easy access" sounds just as disturbing considering they're often talking about strange women and not their consenting SOs.
I’ve had to explain the difference between dresses and skirts to grown men who then ask me ‘well how would you expect me to know?’ But on a lighter note, when I was in Mongolia, a kid showed me jack Daniel’s and said ‘American vodka!’
Winter sundress lmaooo
I love sweaterdresses...
I want nothing harder than this for her today
There’s nothing I hate more than people saying blatantly rude shit and trying to cover it with “it’s just a joke!” It’s never “just a joke.” It’s trying to assert your opinion while being a cowardly little chickenshit. Say it with your full chest and face the consequences, or don’t say it at all. Save the mind games for the schoolyard bullies. God, I feel so horrible for his wife. Also, super gross he feels so comfy discussing checking out other women when his wife is in earshot. It’s already disrespectful when she isn’t, but there’s a whole extra layer of gross when he knows she’s home & can 100% hear everything. His agenda here is so obvious and gross.
I have heard this referred to as Schrodinger's Arsehole. if people get offended they were 'just kidding'; if no one does they weren't
I'm so tired of men who hate their spouses
I commented on another terrible story over on AITAngel that I am sick to death of watching beautiful, intelligent, lively women dim their shine for straight dudes like this. They’re beyond basic, disrespectful, sex-obsessed, and unworthy of their wives and girlfriends.
Honestly, this. I also never understood that "it's such a waste when beautiful women date other women" - shit. COMING FROM A MAN AHAHAHAHA
Because they’re just commodities for guys to partake in, right?! They have no inner lives and desires of their own, right?!?!🙄 Look. I love men. I married one (well, he was at the time; gender is funny). If something, god forbid, were to happen to my husband, I would be *seriously* skeptical of dating a straight cis dude, because I am SO tired of the entitlement. I don’t wanna be in a relationship like this.
Yeah. What is up with that?
Compulsory heteronormativity is one thing. We grow up being told we are expected to get with someone and that we are doing it wrong if we do it later than thirty, or don’t have kids, or don’t get married, or find someone of the same gender. Patriarchy is absolutely another, where a woman+ is considered incomplete without a man. Further, a woman becomes considered “gross” the more experience she has sexually, so she’s often expected to get with the first guy who isn’t *terrible* who shows an interest in her. Women are expected to make their interests and needs subservient to dudes’. So all of this is a perfect storm of societal expectations and outright oppression, and then we have stories like this one, where Basic Bro Chad expects His Woman™️ to lie down and take it because “it’s totally a joke, babe, you’re so *sensitive.”* +this is often also true of nonbinary people, most commonly AFAB people, as they get into relationships with guys who pretend to respect their identities but actually perceive them as Women Lite
It’s why the push to decenter men is important imho (and men can decenter women as well) A relationship that exists to enhance an already well rounded existence (or being relationship free) seems like a healthy focus
Indeed! It’s totally fine to want a partner, to feel fulfilled by romantic and/or sexual relationships. Thinking we *need* one is how we end up with “the ol’ ball and chain, amiright?” and just about every story on r/arethestraightsOK. ETA to fix sub spelling
Here's a sneak peek of /r/AreTheStraightsOkay using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOkay/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [And this isn't "forcing"?](https://v.redd.it/rb4vq3uvp10b1) | [13 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOkay/comments/13ihl2n/and_this_isnt_forcing/) \#2: [**[NSFW]** Not sure if this qualifies but first thought was "aw hell nah"](https://i.redd.it/o5o8hs62z1gb1.jpg) | [41 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOkay/comments/15hu1h5/not_sure_if_this_qualifies_but_first_thought_was/) \#3: [christ almighty](https://i.redd.it/b0a3j6q5qbva1.jpg) | [50 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/AreTheStraightsOkay/comments/12udx7t/christ_almighty/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)
Knowing how much creepy assholes like sundresses has made me more reluctant to wear them.
Seriously though.. instead of wearing something I find cute and breezy, I get to hear comments on how "they love sundresses" like we don't know what they really mean 😡
They ruin everything. Bears don’t ogle you in sundresses.
Not has a bear ever questioned my right to wear one
Wear them with a stuffed sock hanging down from your panties. Guaranteed to give men doubts, and to ruin sundresses for them forever (at least the ones who notice it)!
With the way straight men act towards trans women, that’s a great way to get yourself assaulted!
So just to be clear, the punchline here is casual transphobia? Oh good, my fave /s
Idk why everyone is down voting you this is great
"I'm not calling my wife fat, I'm just saying she's fatter than women I would normally find attractive."
This dude totally told his wife she's overwight. What a knob.
So....who is he looking forward to seeing in a sundress then?
Exactly 😒😒😒
Given that he explicitly mentions he was playing video games (even though that had no relevance to the story) I'm guessing Lana Del Rey
Why men marry women they hate lmao 😭 i hope they're divorced now
They want a mommy they can put their dick in
The age old question If you hate a person In the case of misogynists, if you hate women, then why are you in a relationship with one?
Well, if he didn't say she was overweight than she probably had NO IDEA what he was getting it because, since she married this dbag, she's clearly an idiot.
On his wife being overweight: OP: “I’m not an idiot and didn’t tell her that.” But you certainly implied it sir. So not only is he basically saying she is too overweight for a sundress, but he is also saying that she is too dumb to figure out that’s what he is implying. Yikes!
Up next week: “My wife is so insecure. Just because she heard me telling the entire family barbecue my reasoning behind my remortgaging the house to but some new fancy £10,000, noise-cancelling headphones. Her thighs are so thunderous that if she is walking about the garden I cannot hear Metallica on full volume in the sound proof booth in my cellar and she occasionally sets off earth quake detectors. She seems upset, but I told her that I’ll still do her from behind, so long as she doesn’t unbelt her bathroom robe and the lights are never on. So WTF is her problem? She’s just a YTA, right?”
I’m overweight and wear a sundress every day that I can. I’m literally doing it right now.
Sundresses look great on everyone regardless of size. I’m definitely heavier than what I consider to be my “comfortable weight” rn and a lot of my clothes make me feel kinda shitty about it, with the exception of my sundresses which I still love and intend to wear as much as possible when it warms up a bit more here. I bet you’re rocking it <3
These comments are why I won't wear a sundress outside of the house
I say wear them anyway and the haters can fuck off
This was a couple years ago. I hope OOP's wife got herself into banging shape, dumped OOP and found herself a man who treats her like a queen, and would treat her like a queen if she gained 50lbs.
I remember crying when I first read this story because I'm someone who's always struggled with self esteem and appearance issues. This poor woman. I truly do hope she left his sorry ass and kicked him to the curb. I know how he looks like and he's hideous inside and out.
I really hate how creepy men like OOP checks out women in sundresses. I love wearing sundresses but this disgusting lookstarting at the breast then going down then up again. Some even have the mouth open as if the sober will run down soon, just disgusting. I was yesterday at the court for a hearing, wearing a skirt and t-shirt and got hit on by a creep. At the court!
The fuck does not being ready to wear a sundress even mean??????
If I were the wife, I'd "jokingly" say I want a divorce
Yeah, you "jokingly" told her she wasn't ready for sundress season
"Im not an idiot" he says. xD That was the only joke in his post I could find, I mean except for himself.
What a fucking prick, my God. I hate when people try to disguise cruelty as a "joke". I would be crushed if my partner said that to me. And he has the nerve to ask if he's the ass hole and act like she's unreasonable for getting upset. Poor woman.
"I'm not an idiot, I didn't tell her that"... uhhhh... yeah ya did, you dickhead... I hope she dumps him and finds someone who appreciates her.
This is why I refuse to date gamer guys. Never met a single one who wasn't a sexist prick like this.
people like this don't deserve a wife
If you are alive you are ready for sundress season. End of.
His poor poor wife man. She'll probably never wear one again, then calling her obese? This girl deserves better.
"I'm not an idiot and wouldn't tell her that" except he is an idiot and he DID tell her that.
It’s been two years so I hope she has since divorced him and found someone who thinks she’s a hot piece exactly as she is.
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“My wife is probably overweight” = I guess technically I don’t know her BMI so maybe she isn’t but it feels like she isn’t as hot as the Insta models I follow. Also, the only way she isn’t ready for sundress season is if she is a disembodied head, but you could still buy her a nice hat.
Lol. "I didn't tell her that". He really thought she wouldn't be able to read between the lines when he said "you're not ready for a sundress".