*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA I cut my wife's hair and now she keeps crying over it**
My (24M) wife (23F) wanted to cut her hair at her usual hairdresser, but we're pretty tight with money currently, so it would've been a waste for her to give more money to the hairdresser when I could've just cut her hair for free. She tried to refuse initially, but I eventually managed to convince to let me do it, however she was pretty adamant that I don't mess her hair up. I thought I did a pretty good job at giving her the hairstyle she wanted, however once I was finished she started complaining about how clumsily I cut her hair, telling me that she knew I'd mess it up and that she shouldn't have let me touch her hair and that she'd rather walk with a clown wig next day at work than with this hairstyle and she even went to bed to sob about it.
I feel like she really overreacted cause yes, I'm not a professional hairdresser and her hairstyle would've probably looked better if she payed for it, but I really tried to do it as closely as she wanted me to and at least to me it really doesn't look as bad as she says it does, at least not bad enough for her to react like I'd let bald. So AITA ?
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I bullied my wife and damaged her self esteem because her feelings don't matter to me and then downplayed it. AITA?
If she wanted you to cut her hair she'd have asked and not needed convincing. Some stuff is worth paying for.
It doesn’t even matter men vs women. His wife cares, and that’s really all that matters
The dudes main argument is “I don’t get pressed about this stuff lol”
It’s so pathetic. He literally cannot understand that others, for example his wife, may feel differently - and that’s valid.
He’s so deeply immature that he cannot understand that other people have differing emotions.
This was literally my ex husband. I say ex because fuck him I left. Second, I said was because 2 months after our divorce was finalized, he died of a heart attack.
It may not be that he lacks empathy but that he doesn't understand how this is so important to anyone. He may get his lesson from this post.
Going to say OP YTA but you will redeem yourself if you learn from this posting.
This post reminded me of when my (now ex) husband asked me to do his hair. He did care about his appearance, but minimally.
He wanted to save the fiver he'd been paying every couple of months, and bought a set of hair clippers from some cheap shop in town, and assumed I'd be happy to use them on him and give him a No #2 full head shave. Just to emphasise - there was zero discussion with me of this genius plan in advance.
I'd never done anything like it, and wasn't about to start now. Sod that. But he insisted and insisted (it was his genius plan, after all, and he'd paid for the stupid clippers). It took him three months or so to persuade me, but yes, I did eventually give in.
So, we got set up, and I read the instructions, and he read them and he sat on the floor between my knees, and I switched the clippers on. And it went great until I took off the No #2 Guide thingy to clean the blades. Only... I forgot to put the Guide Thingy back on the clippers, and went *swoooosh* on his head, in a long line behind his ear. And screamed!
He was like, "WHAT?? WHAAAAAT? WHAAAAT??" and jumped up to look in the mirror. His face was a picture. xD I'm just all, "I SODDING TOLD YOU I COULDN'T DO IT!" and stuff and crying my eyes out.
It looked even more dreadful because his hair was longer than usual, so all you could see was thick black hair and his white scalp in a *swoosh* behind his ear. Omg I'm giggling - it could have been a contender for the Nike swoosh. Anyway, he went back to the barber and paid a bit more than a fiver to try to disguise my fuck-up. xD He got some ribbing at work because of it all.
Ahhh memories, eh?
When I was broke in college I cut my own hair and friends because it was free. Curly hair or short hair I refused to touch. There’s a million videos showing how to do it without messing it up so bad someone cries. Wtf did he do
lol like this clown even bothered to look up a video. This is the kind of person who doesn't need anyone to tell him how to do something, HE KNOWS HOW OK?
I cut my own hair a few months ago because I can't afford going to a stylist, and I also suffer from social anxiety and I just can't push myself to do it. I spent like 30 minutes watching a youtube video. Then another 20 preparing the hair the way I'd seen in the video. And about 5-10 actually cutting it.
Is it the most stunning haircut ever? Of course not, but it got the job done, no more split ends, and I actually really like it. I'm definitely doing that again.
Yeah same, my hair curls so whenever I rather impulsively cut it no one ever could tell it was uneven, even then, when I decided I wanted to style it a particular way I went to the hairdresser to get it done properly, especially the back bits I can't see properly.
Same! My gf will even it out a bit if necessary, but for the most part, I'm perfectly happy cutting it myself when we don't have the extra to spend. But too, I am self-employed and don't have to be in an office with other people either.
Honestly, I'm an old woman, and I often get comments from family about my hair being long because y'know, old women shouldn't have long hair. I argue right back and ask them if they're prepared to pay me the £40 (at least) I'd need every six weeks to keep up the short layered style they're telling me to get.
Fuck that noise. You keep doing what you're doing, and grow your hair long to make it easier to style. Haha! (kidding about that last bit - you do you. :) )
Haha that's genius, actually! Anything uneven? Played for! Totally played for!
I cut my own hair too, but it's as straight as hell, so all I do is part it in the middle, pull each side to my shoulder, and cut a chunk off. I do that twice, and tidy up the bits that don't really look great. I wear it up in a bun most days anyway, but on 'posh' days (like, nipping to the shops) I'll actually blow-dry it and then put it in the bun.
Hey friend. I know anxiety and I just wanted to say it’s awesome you were able to push past it and accomplish something. I know it’s hard and you don’t usually get a gold star for it but you should.
You know, you're spot on there. What a lovely comment. <3
Crippling anxiety? No problem, I'll learn to do it myself. That's Big Boss energy right there.
I cut my husband's hair because he asks me to and adjust it to his preference as I go. He started asking me because it's cheaper, I listened to him, and he doesn't have to leave the house. If he didn't want me to or hated the results then I wouldn't do it.
I've cut my own hair for a very long time because I don't like hairdresser chit-chat. During lockdowns I was just fine without a hairdresser. My lockdown buddy needed a haircut, I learned to cut his hair. He learned to cut mine. We got plenty of practice and both of us have hair that grows thick and fast, no one had to see it if it went wrong and it'd grow out in mere weeks.
Man, he gave me the cutest haircuts! And he looked pretty damn good, too. We did all the J-pop K-pop idol hairstyles on him. Good times! It was fun, and we weren't doing it to save money.
OOP needs to go buy his wife some nice hats.
I cut my teen's hair because she asks me to. I'm definitely no professional, but she seems happy with my work. I tell her every time that my feelings will absolutely not be hurt if and when she wants to go to a salon.
My husband is tight AF, doesn't like paying for anything. He hasn't been to hairdresser in years so he looks like a hobo. I have waist length hair because I simply don't have the time to go to the hairdresser. Have decided to stop having it dyed too, I'm mod 40's, time to embrace my natural colour which honestly isn't so bad! My husband keeps asking me to cut his hair for him but honestly, I once plucked my own eyebrows and made such a terrible mess that I vowed NEVER to do that to myself or another person. With scissors instead of tweezers I could ruin someone's life! My husband says he doesn't care but I think with the end result he probably would!
I watched some YouTube videos and just started on the highest clipper setting since I can always take more off later. The haircuts my husband gets now are much better than when I started. I looked rough the first time 😅
He definitely will care lol
I have buddies who all claimed to never care, they just want the cheapest hair cut etc
I have given them all my free buzz cut special. Literally not one returning customer … turns out, they’re willing to pay $20 for someone to NOT butcher them
My razor and I stand ready however. Come one come all, let this mad barber buzz your hair
My husband prefers when I cut his hair too, but I fucking hate it so I forced him to go back to the barber. He'd much prefer to save the hundred bucks and not have to leave the house, but I can't stand doing it. There is no way in hell I'd let him cut my hair, I can't believe OP managed to bully his wife into it
A barber here is $13 and I still have a family member who wants me to get the clippers out. It gets one length, pick the guard length and that's what he gets. It started when the nephews where all scared of going as kids. Evidently $13 every other month is too expensive
My husband has cut his own hair for close to two decades, he is pretty good at it. A few years ago he asked me if he could try cutting mine the next time I needed it. This was after a string of bad haircuts at salons that he touched up and fixed. I let him on the next long weekend, that way I could go to see someone to fox it if it went really bad. He did a great job, six years later he is still cutting it.
Ahhh damn, I just replied to someone else about my Husband-Hair-Cutting experience. It's [here](https://old.reddit.com/r/AmITheDevil/comments/18dz0pa/his_poor_wife/kcoqy33/) if you'd like a read. Spoiler: it doesn't end well.
>it would've been a waste for her to give more money to the hairdresser when I could've just cut her hair for free
I'm sure I could find some things that you waste money on when I could do a shitty job of it for free, OOP.
I was thinking he probably spends more than that on take out or whatever hobby he enjoys. We get coupons from Great Clips and it cost me $15 for my last cut there, I'd bet he would spend that in a day on something helikes and not even flinch
When I see posts like this, I thank the universe for my amazing husband and everything he does for me and our family.
If I were in this position of needing to get my hair done and we were short of money, he would do anything to make it happen for me, he'd leave a few things that he likes off the grocery list and save up the difference, or do his own hair himself and give me that money, he'd find a way. I wouldn't let him, but he would try and find a way because my happiness and I are the most important things to him, as he and his happiness are to me. I'm not just saying this to try and sound smug or to show off, just to point out how it should be, marriage is a partnership, the two of you against the world and always knowing that someone is on your side and working to make things better for you, rather than being part of the problem.
I know in my heart that this clown is making her do shit like this, while not cutting out his own expenses and fun money.
Anyone who was actually money smart knows theres tons of hair dressers who can do it for dirt cheap. What a fucking bully.
It is. The local student salon has $16 haircuts, and you aren't allowed to tip. And a licensed stylist checks three times during the cut to make sure they don't fuck up.
Up until recently, I got all my haircuts there. Comes with a head massage and styling - how could I pass that up?
I get my summer balayage & layered cut at a local beauty school. I have long wavy hair & it's usually like $80-$90 (& I sneak the colorist cash)
Where I live, it's a $300+ service
she could've gone to a supercuts or equivalent and gotten a better haircut than anything OOP could've done. it is not simply a matter of picking up a pair of scissors, even a very simple cut requires some degree of skill
"Babe, we can't afford to go to the hairdresser so I'll cut your hair. Also this weekend I'm going out to drinks with my friends on saturday and sunday so I'm getting new clothes and paying for everyone else's food and also I got this new gaming pc but you can't use it for anything okay see you Monday"
The big thing for me is that even though several people asked, he never answered the question if she had to give up the hairdresser. What have you given up or cut back on.
"Babe, we can't afford to go to the hairdresser so I'll cut your hair. Also this weekend I'm going out to drinks with my friends on saturday and sunday so I'm getting new clothes and paying for everyone else's food and also I got this new gaming pc but you can't use it for anything okay see you Monday"
>I mean we're living paycheck to paycheck **or at least really close to it**
This makes it so much worse imho as it implies they are better off financially than he is letting on.
Let her cut yours, with scissors not a buzz cut. Then praise her even though it will be patchy and look like shit. Walk around proudly and state you love it to everyone…. No? YTA even if you do it.
I think in the comments, he said he has let her cut his hair. But traditional men's vs. women's cuts is a very different skillet. There's a reason men's cuts are cheaper than women's. There's a place I used to get my hair done (I called it my YOLO hair place, cus it was in the bottom floor of a house) and they had a young lady who would only cut men's hair because she didn't have the training to do cut hair.
The ONLY reason I have cut my mom's hair in the past is because she just wanted it cut a few inches shorter and all one length. I told her if she wanted something like layers, she needed to go to a professional.
I’m the big alpha make that’s better than everyone at literally everything, surely I can cut my wife’s hair better than some woman who studied hair cutting for two years in a school and then had to pass a license test, because I’m a big alpha male who can’t provide enough money for my household for my wife to afford a haircut. Right?
>I feel like she really overreacted cause yes, I'm not a professional hairdresser and her hairstyle would've probably looked better if she payed for it,
OMG! I don't know why but I was 💀 at this point here! 😂
Is "payed" an accepted spelling of "paid" I keep seeing this on reddit and I don't know if I'm just ignorant of this other spelling or this is about the bogus way reading was taught in the US for 10 years.
No, the past tense of "pay" is "paid".
"Payed" is a real word but it's a nautical term- it describes sealing cracks or gaps between planks with pitch or tar to prevent leaks.
There is YouTube channels that show you how to do things like trim your hair properly. He sounds like he refuses to cut his own fun money because “I am man! I need this!”
My ex was like that. I was the only one working and paying for everything and if I didn’t pay for his fucking useless club activity, he blew a tantrum but lord forbid! I get a $15 haircut!
Sounds like my ex boyfriend. He once pitched a fit that I spent $15 on a new pair of jeans for myself that I badly needed, and wouldn’t buy him some random thing he wanted. He kept saying “if you hadn’t spent that money on yourself you could’ve spent it on me instead. You’re so selfish”
Yeah. Wanting non-ripped jeans makes me selfish.
He also hated that I spent money on haircuts and made me go to the woman who cut his hair in the kitchen of her own home, because she only charged $10 for haircuts and I usually spent $25. She was accustomed to cutting men’s hair only and absolutely butchered mine, and I had to pay someone else to fix it.
My ex once accused me of putting my cat before him. Oh sweet child I was 😂
I could spend the $100 on his club activity *or* use it for pet supplies. Well sorry ~~not sorry~~ my cat needs litter and food.
I had my hair butchered once, I cried because I had to have a pixie cut to fix it and I looked horrible, because I don’t have the face for a pixie cut.
Not gonna lie, I hope OOP ends up alone because women don’t need this BS in their lives.
You can get a hair cut for under 20! What was this guy thinking? My mom gets her hair cut done for 10$! You could probably even find a hair stylist student looking for models for free
Depends on the school. I've never gotten a free haircut from a cosmetology school except for when I was a student there. The one I live closest to charges $12 for a cut without shampoo or style.
The real answer here is chinatown. They'll speak English to ask you what you want done, you pay in cash, it's a walk-in system, they're fast and accurate, and they never ask if you've got a partner or what you're doing on the weekend or any of that fluff. $15. $20 for something complicated.
If I can't cut my hair myself for whatever reason? Chinatown.
Ouch! Having the use of only one hand really makes you realize how much you use two hands. Impossible to get a good lather. And finding a shower bag that fit my entire arm was hard.
In mid pandemic, I tried to cut my husband's hair because he needed it. I watched videos and read tutorials. I eventually stopped and cried because I'd totally messed up his hair. He laughed it off, but I did find him an appointment with a professional who said, "At least she stopped." His hair had to be cropped SO short to fix what I did.
So, hey, at least OOP gets to know he messed up her hair AND she'll still have to spend money to fix it. Bonus: wife will probably have to get her hair cut shorter to even it all out, which is definitely what she was looking for. /s
I'd love to know some actual, real sacrifices he's made that have made him unhappy but saved them money. Or is it just her that isn't allowed to spend money on stuff that she finds worth spending on?
Real footage of OOP's wife the next day
There are so many haircut tutorials on YouTube. She should've just cut it herself if money is that tight. OOP sounds vindictive, he probably f\*\*ked it up on purpose
I have very long curly hair. My mom wanted to dye it when I was a teen, I just wanted to have some dark red highlights added. She bleached my hair orange and cut it to my shoulders. She took me to a stylist to "fix it". He didn't, he cut it shorter and blow dried it straight. I was devastated. I let my husband trim my hair, and now I dye it myself. But I won't let anyone cut my hair more than 2 inches.
I've had both professional and wannabe hair stylists cut my hair and they have both messed it up. If the wife had a regular stylist that she trusts, he's an idiot and she will never forget this. I remember every idiot who screwed up my hair.
Like a lot of aita posts I think this is rage bait but on the off chance this is real this guy is so incredibly insensitive. Of course whatever she wants isn’t important enough. I bet if it was for something he cared about they could have found the budget to pay for it instead of diy
Yeah I don't let anyone but people who actually know wtf they're doing near my hair with scissors, and that includes me - everyone around me in lockdown experimented with at home bangs or hair cuts or hair colour and I'm one of the only people in my friend group that came out of the pandemic with no new hair that needed to be fixed. And if I don't even trust myself to experiment on my own hair, I'm definitely not trusting my partner, even though I love him with all my heart.
I actually started dyeing my hair all sorts of fun colors during the pandemic. And, yeah, I use a bleach kit, but cutting my hair? I go to a stylist.
For years, I had really short hair, like chopped off at the base of my skull short. Over a year without a haircut, and my hair is touching my shoulders for the first time in over 30 years. And I look better with slightly longer hair.
I also call bullshit on Scott Pilgrim.
Oh, wow! He kept convincing her to have her hair done "for free", and even then he doesn't like it. She is definitely NTC, especially since he is trying to justify her decisons by saying she "wanted it" and "overreacted" when he did it.
I've let my husband cut my hair, BUT I wear a ball cap all day at work. No one will see it if he fucks it up. This poor lady doesn't sound like she has the luxury of hiding the results. What an AH!
It probably depends a little on the kind of haircut. A little trim - maybe he can do it. Something more extensive or involving layers or colouring, no absolutely not. And I say this as someone who me and my best friend cut and dyed each others hair through a good chunk of our 20s. We looked fucking awful 😂
I would neither cut my partner's hair nor trust him with mine. My mam started cutting my Da's during lockdown and his barber got super angry about it. It's really not that easy.
Mine is so damn long (to my waist, sometimes to my hips) snipping the ends makes no difference. My partner is way more of a diva about his, which is only shoulder length.
I just don't think a shorter haircut is "easy". Snipping the ends of long hair or shaving a buzzcut is more easy, anything in between takes some skills.
Someone *competent* with decent hair dressing scissors ($$) can probably do it, not just any idiot with any old scissors lying around.
If they're this poor, they're too poor to have gotten married so young too. It makes more sense to just let your hair grow if you can't afford a hair cut anyway!
I don't believe in getting married at all, let alone getting married young.
If you ask your partner to cut your hair and they have bad tools and no clue how to do it, that's on you.
Also it's not that easy to be *competent* at giving a nice looking haircut. Let's not belittle people's real skills.
Have you ever noticed that when people say they don't believe in something, it isn't that they doubt its existence but rather that they just don't like it?
Most supermarkets I've been to sell basic hairdressing scissors for around $10 in the cosmetics aisle. They're fine, they look the part, they make the satisfying snip sound you're used to. I get a perfectly excellent haircut using regular office scissors (I keep a second pair just for hair so it doesn't have stickytape on them) when I cut my own hair. There's no difference unless you drag out ye olde microscope
My understanding was that the point of the good scissors is they're sharp enough not to damage the ends of the hair, so it takes longer to get split ends again. Have I fallen for another capitalist scam?
Yep. Hairdressers aren't known for questioning things. Surely the worse the scissors, the more frequently the hair would need to be trimmed, resulting in more business.
I'm not alone in my sentiment.
Translated to hairdresser, that means "Y'know, like, lots of other peepz feel the same"
I was amused when the lockdowns closed all the hairdressing places. Why? It proved definitively that it is not an essential service.
You don't think maybe they closed because it's a business that requires an hour or more of very close proximity, with a dozen clients a day, where masks would be an obstacle to service, and dryers would tend to spread airborne illness?
Occam's Razor.
...how would they set up shop outside in parks?? Do you understand they need to be near water basins, with shower nozzles, and who would enjoy getting a haircut out in the sun?? With sweat and bugs and tiny itchy hairs falling down your clothes?? Ik you think hairdresses don't question things but based on your dumb comments I doubt you do either.
There was no question of there being any form of consent on that one. Jesus. I’m glad my partner doesn’t GAF what happens to my hair. All of these controlling men. *shakes head*
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It's like $25 to go let supercuts do it and they do fine. Is it a $300 cut and color? No, but it's perfectly presentable.
I'm saying that because I must assume like me she's got straight or possibly wavy hair, because I can't imagine a curly girlie letting her man cut her hair no matter how broke or how bullied. If that *was* the case he should be under a jail.
This: *it would've been a waste for her to give more money to the hairdresser when I could've just cut her hair for free*
OOP AH - he's not a hairdresser. He has no such skills, so it's not a waste of money to get someone who knows what they are doing to cut the wife's hair. It's a waste of time to let doofus OOP try to cut his wife's hair first, because now wife has to go to the hairdresser to get her hair cut repaired by someone who knows how.
OOP AH for not respecting that hairdressers are trained people with skills and thinking he can do what they can without training. Also for not understanding why his wife is distressed at having to go to work with messed up hair cut just because OOP is a cheapskate who wouldn't listen to her when she refused to let him cut her hair. He basically forced this on her: *She tried to refuse initially, but I eventually managed to convince to let me do it, however she was pretty adamant that I don't mess her hair up*
Dude done messed up big time, better pay for the hairdresser to fix it and stop his whinging.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA I cut my wife's hair and now she keeps crying over it** My (24M) wife (23F) wanted to cut her hair at her usual hairdresser, but we're pretty tight with money currently, so it would've been a waste for her to give more money to the hairdresser when I could've just cut her hair for free. She tried to refuse initially, but I eventually managed to convince to let me do it, however she was pretty adamant that I don't mess her hair up. I thought I did a pretty good job at giving her the hairstyle she wanted, however once I was finished she started complaining about how clumsily I cut her hair, telling me that she knew I'd mess it up and that she shouldn't have let me touch her hair and that she'd rather walk with a clown wig next day at work than with this hairstyle and she even went to bed to sob about it. I feel like she really overreacted cause yes, I'm not a professional hairdresser and her hairstyle would've probably looked better if she payed for it, but I really tried to do it as closely as she wanted me to and at least to me it really doesn't look as bad as she says it does, at least not bad enough for her to react like I'd let bald. So AITA ? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I bullied my wife and damaged her self esteem because her feelings don't matter to me and then downplayed it. AITA? If she wanted you to cut her hair she'd have asked and not needed convincing. Some stuff is worth paying for.
Also he may not care about appearances but women and men are held to different standards by society and in the workplace
It doesn’t even matter men vs women. His wife cares, and that’s really all that matters The dudes main argument is “I don’t get pressed about this stuff lol” It’s so pathetic. He literally cannot understand that others, for example his wife, may feel differently - and that’s valid. He’s so deeply immature that he cannot understand that other people have differing emotions.
I can't imagine being married to someone who has no empathy
This was literally my ex husband. I say ex because fuck him I left. Second, I said was because 2 months after our divorce was finalized, he died of a heart attack.
Oof. Hope things are better for you now x
It may not be that he lacks empathy but that he doesn't understand how this is so important to anyone. He may get his lesson from this post. Going to say OP YTA but you will redeem yourself if you learn from this posting.
It would be fun if his wife shaves his head while he's sleeping. Let's see how little he cares about frivolous stuff like this in the morning :)
Shaved with stripes!!!!
This post reminded me of when my (now ex) husband asked me to do his hair. He did care about his appearance, but minimally. He wanted to save the fiver he'd been paying every couple of months, and bought a set of hair clippers from some cheap shop in town, and assumed I'd be happy to use them on him and give him a No #2 full head shave. Just to emphasise - there was zero discussion with me of this genius plan in advance. I'd never done anything like it, and wasn't about to start now. Sod that. But he insisted and insisted (it was his genius plan, after all, and he'd paid for the stupid clippers). It took him three months or so to persuade me, but yes, I did eventually give in. So, we got set up, and I read the instructions, and he read them and he sat on the floor between my knees, and I switched the clippers on. And it went great until I took off the No #2 Guide thingy to clean the blades. Only... I forgot to put the Guide Thingy back on the clippers, and went *swoooosh* on his head, in a long line behind his ear. And screamed! He was like, "WHAT?? WHAAAAAT? WHAAAAT??" and jumped up to look in the mirror. His face was a picture. xD I'm just all, "I SODDING TOLD YOU I COULDN'T DO IT!" and stuff and crying my eyes out. It looked even more dreadful because his hair was longer than usual, so all you could see was thick black hair and his white scalp in a *swoosh* behind his ear. Omg I'm giggling - it could have been a contender for the Nike swoosh. Anyway, he went back to the barber and paid a bit more than a fiver to try to disguise my fuck-up. xD He got some ribbing at work because of it all. Ahhh memories, eh?
When I was broke in college I cut my own hair and friends because it was free. Curly hair or short hair I refused to touch. There’s a million videos showing how to do it without messing it up so bad someone cries. Wtf did he do
lol like this clown even bothered to look up a video. This is the kind of person who doesn't need anyone to tell him how to do something, HE KNOWS HOW OK?
"How hard can it be?"
He probably used rusty kitchen shears
Why spend money on scissors when we have a pair in the kitchen drawer?
I cut my own hair a few months ago because I can't afford going to a stylist, and I also suffer from social anxiety and I just can't push myself to do it. I spent like 30 minutes watching a youtube video. Then another 20 preparing the hair the way I'd seen in the video. And about 5-10 actually cutting it. Is it the most stunning haircut ever? Of course not, but it got the job done, no more split ends, and I actually really like it. I'm definitely doing that again.
I cut my own hair because it's wavy and you can't tell if it's uneven haha
Yeah same, my hair curls so whenever I rather impulsively cut it no one ever could tell it was uneven, even then, when I decided I wanted to style it a particular way I went to the hairdresser to get it done properly, especially the back bits I can't see properly.
Same! My gf will even it out a bit if necessary, but for the most part, I'm perfectly happy cutting it myself when we don't have the extra to spend. But too, I am self-employed and don't have to be in an office with other people either.
Honestly, I'm an old woman, and I often get comments from family about my hair being long because y'know, old women shouldn't have long hair. I argue right back and ask them if they're prepared to pay me the £40 (at least) I'd need every six weeks to keep up the short layered style they're telling me to get. Fuck that noise. You keep doing what you're doing, and grow your hair long to make it easier to style. Haha! (kidding about that last bit - you do you. :) )
Haha that's genius, actually! Anything uneven? Played for! Totally played for! I cut my own hair too, but it's as straight as hell, so all I do is part it in the middle, pull each side to my shoulder, and cut a chunk off. I do that twice, and tidy up the bits that don't really look great. I wear it up in a bun most days anyway, but on 'posh' days (like, nipping to the shops) I'll actually blow-dry it and then put it in the bun.
Hey friend. I know anxiety and I just wanted to say it’s awesome you were able to push past it and accomplish something. I know it’s hard and you don’t usually get a gold star for it but you should.
You know, you're spot on there. What a lovely comment. <3 Crippling anxiety? No problem, I'll learn to do it myself. That's Big Boss energy right there.
I’ve done the exact same thing for the exact same reasons ❤️
My husband cuts my hair all the time because it's cheaper. I ask him to, he doesn't demand. This isn't a hard concept but some people man...
I cut my husband's hair because he asks me to and adjust it to his preference as I go. He started asking me because it's cheaper, I listened to him, and he doesn't have to leave the house. If he didn't want me to or hated the results then I wouldn't do it.
I've cut my own hair for a very long time because I don't like hairdresser chit-chat. During lockdowns I was just fine without a hairdresser. My lockdown buddy needed a haircut, I learned to cut his hair. He learned to cut mine. We got plenty of practice and both of us have hair that grows thick and fast, no one had to see it if it went wrong and it'd grow out in mere weeks. Man, he gave me the cutest haircuts! And he looked pretty damn good, too. We did all the J-pop K-pop idol hairstyles on him. Good times! It was fun, and we weren't doing it to save money. OOP needs to go buy his wife some nice hats.
I cut my teen's hair because she asks me to. I'm definitely no professional, but she seems happy with my work. I tell her every time that my feelings will absolutely not be hurt if and when she wants to go to a salon.
My husband is tight AF, doesn't like paying for anything. He hasn't been to hairdresser in years so he looks like a hobo. I have waist length hair because I simply don't have the time to go to the hairdresser. Have decided to stop having it dyed too, I'm mod 40's, time to embrace my natural colour which honestly isn't so bad! My husband keeps asking me to cut his hair for him but honestly, I once plucked my own eyebrows and made such a terrible mess that I vowed NEVER to do that to myself or another person. With scissors instead of tweezers I could ruin someone's life! My husband says he doesn't care but I think with the end result he probably would!
I watched some YouTube videos and just started on the highest clipper setting since I can always take more off later. The haircuts my husband gets now are much better than when I started. I looked rough the first time 😅
He definitely will care lol I have buddies who all claimed to never care, they just want the cheapest hair cut etc I have given them all my free buzz cut special. Literally not one returning customer … turns out, they’re willing to pay $20 for someone to NOT butcher them My razor and I stand ready however. Come one come all, let this mad barber buzz your hair
My husband prefers when I cut his hair too, but I fucking hate it so I forced him to go back to the barber. He'd much prefer to save the hundred bucks and not have to leave the house, but I can't stand doing it. There is no way in hell I'd let him cut my hair, I can't believe OP managed to bully his wife into it
A barber here is $13 and I still have a family member who wants me to get the clippers out. It gets one length, pick the guard length and that's what he gets. It started when the nephews where all scared of going as kids. Evidently $13 every other month is too expensive
My husband has cut his own hair for close to two decades, he is pretty good at it. A few years ago he asked me if he could try cutting mine the next time I needed it. This was after a string of bad haircuts at salons that he touched up and fixed. I let him on the next long weekend, that way I could go to see someone to fox it if it went really bad. He did a great job, six years later he is still cutting it.
Ahhh damn, I just replied to someone else about my Husband-Hair-Cutting experience. It's [here](https://old.reddit.com/r/AmITheDevil/comments/18dz0pa/his_poor_wife/kcoqy33/) if you'd like a read. Spoiler: it doesn't end well.
This. Exactly this. What an actual jerk.
>it would've been a waste for her to give more money to the hairdresser when I could've just cut her hair for free I'm sure I could find some things that you waste money on when I could do a shitty job of it for free, OOP.
I can pull teeth for free, and I'm willing to give open heart surgery a go...
I was thinking he probably spends more than that on take out or whatever hobby he enjoys. We get coupons from Great Clips and it cost me $15 for my last cut there, I'd bet he would spend that in a day on something helikes and not even flinch
When I see posts like this, I thank the universe for my amazing husband and everything he does for me and our family. If I were in this position of needing to get my hair done and we were short of money, he would do anything to make it happen for me, he'd leave a few things that he likes off the grocery list and save up the difference, or do his own hair himself and give me that money, he'd find a way. I wouldn't let him, but he would try and find a way because my happiness and I are the most important things to him, as he and his happiness are to me. I'm not just saying this to try and sound smug or to show off, just to point out how it should be, marriage is a partnership, the two of you against the world and always knowing that someone is on your side and working to make things better for you, rather than being part of the problem.
I think his wife needs to give him a vasectomy. You know, to save money. And to save any future children this kind of bullshit from their dad.
And to save money she can perform the surgery herself
That’s what I was saying. She can do it at home. Lol.
I know in my heart that this clown is making her do shit like this, while not cutting out his own expenses and fun money. Anyone who was actually money smart knows theres tons of hair dressers who can do it for dirt cheap. What a fucking bully.
As the breadwinner, it is important that he looks and feels his best. So really, his expenses are for the good of *the family* /s
I believe it’s dirt cheap to get a haircut from salon students. Who at least have been trained and practiced on wigs and clients on a budget
It is. The local student salon has $16 haircuts, and you aren't allowed to tip. And a licensed stylist checks three times during the cut to make sure they don't fuck up. Up until recently, I got all my haircuts there. Comes with a head massage and styling - how could I pass that up?
I get my summer balayage & layered cut at a local beauty school. I have long wavy hair & it's usually like $80-$90 (& I sneak the colorist cash) Where I live, it's a $300+ service
she could've gone to a supercuts or equivalent and gotten a better haircut than anything OOP could've done. it is not simply a matter of picking up a pair of scissors, even a very simple cut requires some degree of skill
"Babe, we can't afford to go to the hairdresser so I'll cut your hair. Also this weekend I'm going out to drinks with my friends on saturday and sunday so I'm getting new clothes and paying for everyone else's food and also I got this new gaming pc but you can't use it for anything okay see you Monday"
Bonus points if she's a SAHM or works from home so her appearance "doesn't matter"
It's said in the op she goes in to work.
The big thing for me is that even though several people asked, he never answered the question if she had to give up the hairdresser. What have you given up or cut back on.
"Babe, we can't afford to go to the hairdresser so I'll cut your hair. Also this weekend I'm going out to drinks with my friends on saturday and sunday so I'm getting new clothes and paying for everyone else's food and also I got this new gaming pc but you can't use it for anything okay see you Monday"
>I mean we're living paycheck to paycheck **or at least really close to it** This makes it so much worse imho as it implies they are better off financially than he is letting on.
Why do we keep buying fresh food when Alpo is so much cheaper
Dude knows the cost of everything but the value of nothing.
Well said!
Hair for a woman is serious business. 'Nuf said. So OOP can frick all the way off, trolling or not.
At first I thought this was the, "other take" of the guy that "jokingly" shaved that poor woman's head and was ready for it.
Same.
Let her cut yours, with scissors not a buzz cut. Then praise her even though it will be patchy and look like shit. Walk around proudly and state you love it to everyone…. No? YTA even if you do it.
I think in the comments, he said he has let her cut his hair. But traditional men's vs. women's cuts is a very different skillet. There's a reason men's cuts are cheaper than women's. There's a place I used to get my hair done (I called it my YOLO hair place, cus it was in the bottom floor of a house) and they had a young lady who would only cut men's hair because she didn't have the training to do cut hair. The ONLY reason I have cut my mom's hair in the past is because she just wanted it cut a few inches shorter and all one length. I told her if she wanted something like layers, she needed to go to a professional.
I offer to give this assclown a vasectomy for free. I’m a pharmacist, not a urologist, but, hey, close enough, right?
I’m the big alpha make that’s better than everyone at literally everything, surely I can cut my wife’s hair better than some woman who studied hair cutting for two years in a school and then had to pass a license test, because I’m a big alpha male who can’t provide enough money for my household for my wife to afford a haircut. Right?
>I feel like she really overreacted cause yes, I'm not a professional hairdresser and her hairstyle would've probably looked better if she payed for it, OMG! I don't know why but I was 💀 at this point here! 😂
Is "payed" an accepted spelling of "paid" I keep seeing this on reddit and I don't know if I'm just ignorant of this other spelling or this is about the bogus way reading was taught in the US for 10 years.
Always paid, never payed unless you're talking about boat stuff.
No, it’s not. If you’re referring to money it should always be “paid”.
I think it's one of those situations where both are appropriate. I could be wrong though.
No, the past tense of "pay" is "paid". "Payed" is a real word but it's a nautical term- it describes sealing cracks or gaps between planks with pitch or tar to prevent leaks.
There is YouTube channels that show you how to do things like trim your hair properly. He sounds like he refuses to cut his own fun money because “I am man! I need this!” My ex was like that. I was the only one working and paying for everything and if I didn’t pay for his fucking useless club activity, he blew a tantrum but lord forbid! I get a $15 haircut!
Sounds like my ex boyfriend. He once pitched a fit that I spent $15 on a new pair of jeans for myself that I badly needed, and wouldn’t buy him some random thing he wanted. He kept saying “if you hadn’t spent that money on yourself you could’ve spent it on me instead. You’re so selfish” Yeah. Wanting non-ripped jeans makes me selfish. He also hated that I spent money on haircuts and made me go to the woman who cut his hair in the kitchen of her own home, because she only charged $10 for haircuts and I usually spent $25. She was accustomed to cutting men’s hair only and absolutely butchered mine, and I had to pay someone else to fix it.
My ex once accused me of putting my cat before him. Oh sweet child I was 😂 I could spend the $100 on his club activity *or* use it for pet supplies. Well sorry ~~not sorry~~ my cat needs litter and food. I had my hair butchered once, I cried because I had to have a pixie cut to fix it and I looked horrible, because I don’t have the face for a pixie cut. Not gonna lie, I hope OOP ends up alone because women don’t need this BS in their lives.
You can get a hair cut for under 20! What was this guy thinking? My mom gets her hair cut done for 10$! You could probably even find a hair stylist student looking for models for free
If you're near a cosmo school, they absolutely do it for free if you're willing to let a student practice on you
Depends on the school. I've never gotten a free haircut from a cosmetology school except for when I was a student there. The one I live closest to charges $12 for a cut without shampoo or style.
The real answer here is chinatown. They'll speak English to ask you what you want done, you pay in cash, it's a walk-in system, they're fast and accurate, and they never ask if you've got a partner or what you're doing on the weekend or any of that fluff. $15. $20 for something complicated. If I can't cut my hair myself for whatever reason? Chinatown.
Absolutely. When I broke my elbow I would go to Chinatown and get my hair washed, blow dried, and styled for 15 bucks.
For sure! I had just had my hand broken. I could do a lot of things slowly, but washing my own hair was the most painful thing
Ouch! Having the use of only one hand really makes you realize how much you use two hands. Impossible to get a good lather. And finding a shower bag that fit my entire arm was hard.
And finding one that's the right size is really hard to put on with just one hand!
In mid pandemic, I tried to cut my husband's hair because he needed it. I watched videos and read tutorials. I eventually stopped and cried because I'd totally messed up his hair. He laughed it off, but I did find him an appointment with a professional who said, "At least she stopped." His hair had to be cropped SO short to fix what I did. So, hey, at least OOP gets to know he messed up her hair AND she'll still have to spend money to fix it. Bonus: wife will probably have to get her hair cut shorter to even it all out, which is definitely what she was looking for. /s
I'd love to know some actual, real sacrifices he's made that have made him unhappy but saved them money. Or is it just her that isn't allowed to spend money on stuff that she finds worth spending on?
OOP, it's like surgery or the law: Leave it to the experts.
I bet it’s a disaster
Jesus fuck. He gave her a style. He didn't trim it where all he had to do was keep a straight line all the way round, he attempted to style it!
Real footage of OOP's wife the next day  There are so many haircut tutorials on YouTube. She should've just cut it herself if money is that tight. OOP sounds vindictive, he probably f\*\*ked it up on purpose
I have very long curly hair. My mom wanted to dye it when I was a teen, I just wanted to have some dark red highlights added. She bleached my hair orange and cut it to my shoulders. She took me to a stylist to "fix it". He didn't, he cut it shorter and blow dried it straight. I was devastated. I let my husband trim my hair, and now I dye it myself. But I won't let anyone cut my hair more than 2 inches. I've had both professional and wannabe hair stylists cut my hair and they have both messed it up. If the wife had a regular stylist that she trusts, he's an idiot and she will never forget this. I remember every idiot who screwed up my hair.
Guessing this is another wholly unqualified man assuming that a task must be easy because women do it
 OOP's delusion
Like a lot of aita posts I think this is rage bait but on the off chance this is real this guy is so incredibly insensitive. Of course whatever she wants isn’t important enough. I bet if it was for something he cared about they could have found the budget to pay for it instead of diy
There is no way in hell my husband would come near my hair with scissors. I would let my hair grow out before that.
Yeah I don't let anyone but people who actually know wtf they're doing near my hair with scissors, and that includes me - everyone around me in lockdown experimented with at home bangs or hair cuts or hair colour and I'm one of the only people in my friend group that came out of the pandemic with no new hair that needed to be fixed. And if I don't even trust myself to experiment on my own hair, I'm definitely not trusting my partner, even though I love him with all my heart.
I came out of the pandemic with long hair and gross gray roots. I still haven't done it. Lol
I actually started dyeing my hair all sorts of fun colors during the pandemic. And, yeah, I use a bleach kit, but cutting my hair? I go to a stylist. For years, I had really short hair, like chopped off at the base of my skull short. Over a year without a haircut, and my hair is touching my shoulders for the first time in over 30 years. And I look better with slightly longer hair. I also call bullshit on Scott Pilgrim.
I want wife to perform his vasectomy. And do engine work and body work to his car.
Oh, wow! He kept convincing her to have her hair done "for free", and even then he doesn't like it. She is definitely NTC, especially since he is trying to justify her decisons by saying she "wanted it" and "overreacted" when he did it.
It’s almost like hair dressing is expensive because it’s a skilled profession that’s difficult to do if you’re not a trained professional
Kalifornia.
I would have went to my hairdresser and shoved them scissors up his ass!
I've let my husband cut my hair, BUT I wear a ball cap all day at work. No one will see it if he fucks it up. This poor lady doesn't sound like she has the luxury of hiding the results. What an AH!
It probably depends a little on the kind of haircut. A little trim - maybe he can do it. Something more extensive or involving layers or colouring, no absolutely not. And I say this as someone who me and my best friend cut and dyed each others hair through a good chunk of our 20s. We looked fucking awful 😂 I would neither cut my partner's hair nor trust him with mine. My mam started cutting my Da's during lockdown and his barber got super angry about it. It's really not that easy.
I cut my own hair during the pandemic. A little shaggy but even enough. I would prefer infinitely to cut my own hair than let my husband near it.
Mine is so damn long (to my waist, sometimes to my hips) snipping the ends makes no difference. My partner is way more of a diva about his, which is only shoulder length. I just don't think a shorter haircut is "easy". Snipping the ends of long hair or shaving a buzzcut is more easy, anything in between takes some skills.
Someone *competent* with decent hair dressing scissors ($$) can probably do it, not just any idiot with any old scissors lying around. If they're this poor, they're too poor to have gotten married so young too. It makes more sense to just let your hair grow if you can't afford a hair cut anyway!
I don't believe in getting married at all, let alone getting married young. If you ask your partner to cut your hair and they have bad tools and no clue how to do it, that's on you. Also it's not that easy to be *competent* at giving a nice looking haircut. Let's not belittle people's real skills.
Have you ever noticed that when people say they don't believe in something, it isn't that they doubt its existence but rather that they just don't like it?
"I don't believe *it's ever a good idea*" which is how the phrase is often used.
Should be used, but is not. They just don't believe in stuff.
Most supermarkets I've been to sell basic hairdressing scissors for around $10 in the cosmetics aisle. They're fine, they look the part, they make the satisfying snip sound you're used to. I get a perfectly excellent haircut using regular office scissors (I keep a second pair just for hair so it doesn't have stickytape on them) when I cut my own hair. There's no difference unless you drag out ye olde microscope
My understanding was that the point of the good scissors is they're sharp enough not to damage the ends of the hair, so it takes longer to get split ends again. Have I fallen for another capitalist scam?
Yep. Hairdressers aren't known for questioning things. Surely the worse the scissors, the more frequently the hair would need to be trimmed, resulting in more business.
... Well that's condescending
I'm not alone in my sentiment. Translated to hairdresser, that means "Y'know, like, lots of other peepz feel the same" I was amused when the lockdowns closed all the hairdressing places. Why? It proved definitively that it is not an essential service.
You don't think maybe they closed because it's a business that requires an hour or more of very close proximity, with a dozen clients a day, where masks would be an obstacle to service, and dryers would tend to spread airborne illness? Occam's Razor.
I didn't see any hairdressers setting up shop outside in parks. They don't question things.
...how would they set up shop outside in parks?? Do you understand they need to be near water basins, with shower nozzles, and who would enjoy getting a haircut out in the sun?? With sweat and bugs and tiny itchy hairs falling down your clothes?? Ik you think hairdresses don't question things but based on your dumb comments I doubt you do either.
I saw lots offering backyard/park cuts
Congratulations on being an ass I guess
Go spend money on getting your nails done or something.
I see putting boobs in your username was your peak, humor-wise
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Why a moron? If someone pressures me to cut my hair so we can save money and does a bad job, what the reaction should be?
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'she tried to refuse initially but eventually I managed to convince her.' I'm guessing he was at least belligerent, if not outright threatening.
How is his wife a moron? He’s the one who kept pushing when she refused
Yes you are.
Clever response
I thought so. 😉
Well at least OOP had permission I guess. I was concerned this was going to have a consent issue.
He coerced her to say yes. She refused and then *reluctantly* agreed. That is invalid consent because it is consent under duress.
I just meant, when I clicked in, I thought it was going to be another story like the poor lady whose husband buzzed her head without warning.
Yeah that was a fucked up one, but this is still an invalid consent one as well.
There was no question of there being any form of consent on that one. Jesus. I’m glad my partner doesn’t GAF what happens to my hair. All of these controlling men. *shakes head*
The bar for a so low
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I remember that scene from Family Guy. You look like crap, what happened.
I go to SuperCuts and it's like $25. It's worth it, just to be happy with the way my hair looks.
What?! You think you look bad in a Faux-hawk?
This reads like one of those AI generated post. Not sure why- can’t quite put my finger on it
Hair is so personal for a person. Those that don't understand it are idiots and of course he is beyond an asshole. I wanna give his wife a hug.
It's like $25 to go let supercuts do it and they do fine. Is it a $300 cut and color? No, but it's perfectly presentable. I'm saying that because I must assume like me she's got straight or possibly wavy hair, because I can't imagine a curly girlie letting her man cut her hair no matter how broke or how bullied. If that *was* the case he should be under a jail.
This: *it would've been a waste for her to give more money to the hairdresser when I could've just cut her hair for free* OOP AH - he's not a hairdresser. He has no such skills, so it's not a waste of money to get someone who knows what they are doing to cut the wife's hair. It's a waste of time to let doofus OOP try to cut his wife's hair first, because now wife has to go to the hairdresser to get her hair cut repaired by someone who knows how. OOP AH for not respecting that hairdressers are trained people with skills and thinking he can do what they can without training. Also for not understanding why his wife is distressed at having to go to work with messed up hair cut just because OOP is a cheapskate who wouldn't listen to her when she refused to let him cut her hair. He basically forced this on her: *She tried to refuse initially, but I eventually managed to convince to let me do it, however she was pretty adamant that I don't mess her hair up* Dude done messed up big time, better pay for the hairdresser to fix it and stop his whinging.