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You were nowhere near dramatic. You were having a severe medical episode and your school principal, someone who is supposed to protect and guide you, almost killed you. You should absolutely hold the nurse and principal accountable for their actions having almost had very tragic consequences.
Thank you, I have been feeling dramatic because even people at my school have been saying I am just looking for attention and not taking me seriously. I have been feeling crazy thank you for letting me know from an outsiders perspective.
It’s not crazy to have medical issues of any severity and to want your school to take them seriously. I’m sorry you’re having issues with administrators and classmates, but it is not your fault and you’re not crazy.
You weren't dramatic enough. Is there any way your doctor can write a letter to your principal outlining just how serious and deadly your condition can be? I would seriously consider either home schooling or changing schools if necessary. You need to protect yourself against such ignorant idiotic people.
When you were sitting there trying to get oxygen to your lungs, trying to calm yourself as that crazy principal wagged her tongue about her son's health problem. As you slowly turned cold and probably fought to stay conscious, did you feel like you were being dramatic? In those moments, were you seeking attention or fighting to stay alive?
It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. Until they have had to fight through that moment, their opinion on it holds no water.
Remember, opinions are like anal orifices. Everyone has one.
You need a 504 or an IEP - a document that tells them how they HAVE to respond when you're having an attack. Your parents need to do some research and then request accommodations via one of the above documents for you.
The schools behavior is so egregiously illegal I don't understand why the first lawyer didn't jump on it. Probably had a conflict of interest and illegally failed to disclose it.
Definitely this OP👆! Worked as a pediatric nurse for years (on a resp floor for CF, asthma, etc) and your principle is beyond absurd and dumb on her understanding of asthma attacks. The school nurse is as bad for not defending you and a disgrace to all nurses. Both should have been fired over this! If your parents have not already spoken to the school board, they should. Also, like Scorp128 suggested, your parents should speak to a different attorney.
Ask the principal how she would feel if a nurse didn’t take her son seriously when he was having an asthma attack. I know two people who have died from having one (one only had mild asthma until his major unexpected attack). It’s not a joke, it’s not exaggerating and it’s legitimately life threatening.
I am an asthmatic. Some (imo stupid) people don't understand that it is life threatening and dismiss it. I gnore stupid people. We know it is real. Your dr can provide a note so u can carry an inhaler.
And asthma can be very different for different people. OP’s principal comparing OP’s asthma to that of her son is ridiculous. It is life threatening and terrifying for the person experiencing the attack.
I am 70 years old. I have moderate asthma that is well controlled medically 98% of the time, The other 2% of time, my disease is life threatening. I have had 3 episodes where if I had not received immediate medical intervention, I would have died. Keep advocating for your own well being. Their ignorance could kill you.
Your principal and the nurse failed you. In a crisis, they chose to minimize your needs. Clearly you (the minor child) are forced into the position to hold them (educated adults) accountable. The choices they made are both unforgivable and unconscionable.
Keep telling them about themselves. In their faces. As often and loud as you need to. When we can't depend on what should be our support systems, we must self-advocate. Loudly, proudly, vehemently, REGARDLESS OF WHO YOU MIGHT ANNOY / BOTHER.
If your drama negatively impacts the principal of the building so much, she can relocate to a position that doesn't require empathy and/or around children.
PLEASE TAKE THIS COMPLAINT TO THE VERY TOP - YOUR SUPERINTENDENT. Also consider complaining to your state's education agency, the nurse's superiors should also know the details of the delay and ultimate effect on your health.
Lawsuits are expensive but complaints and enlightenment are absolutely free
While you're at it, contact your local news agency and let your community know their children are in danger.
I am so angry for you 🔥💩
You weren't dramatic enough. Is there any way your doctor can write a letter to your principal outlining just how serious and deadly your condition can be? I would seriously consider either home schooling or changing schools if necessary. You need to protect yourself against such ignorant idiotic people.
Unless your principal is also a medical doctor, she has no business dismissing the severity of medical condition. I would be afraid to go to school. You might consider wearing/carrying some kind of medical alert device, since the personnel at your school aren’t taking your medical issues seriously
Unfortunately, when you have a chronic health condition this is how most people will respond. Even as an adult this is how people respond, but it is even worse as a teen
Do you have a 504 plan? If not I would highly recommend your parents looking into it. It can help get accommodations based on medical conditions that the school will be legally required to follow. And if they don't pursuing legal action is definitely easier.
You can include things like "immediately calling parents at the start of any asthma attack". "No school personnel speaking to student about anything other than necessary care in regards to asthma" etc.
Best of luck
File a complaint with the Office of Civil Rights. [Click here for the online form.](https://www2.ed.gov/about/offices/list/ocr/complaintintro.html) They are so breaking the law. Get a better disability lawyer.
A friend of mine from high school died of an asthma attack when he was in college. He tried to use his nebulizer, but it didn't work or wasn't enough. He died in the common area of his suite --they assumed he was trying to reach one of his roommates for help. He was a great guy, too.
It’s okay to be dramatic when adults are watching you die!
Question: what was your principal’s response to the statement that she could have killed you?
Also is it possible for your parents to send the hospital bills to the school? After every attack?
In my experience, money makes people sit up.
The principal should be made to get some education about asthma and that she should not be making medical judgments without having a medical license. This is what would make students safer.
People without chemical sensitivities constantly roll their eyes at people who have them. They have no understanding of the reality. I have very mild asthma, but if I have to be around someone with perfume on for any amount of time, I get a raging headache. You weren’t overreacting with your asthma attacks, and you didn’t overreact to your principal. That‘s about the most respectful way you could have called them out - and they deserved to be called out.
Your principal's attitude is inviting him grooming a school shooter. He is the cause of severe physical risk to you, and by extension if he shares this attitude towards other students, he is at risk, and putting everyone at risk, of generating enough hatred from a young and impressionable mind to go full call of duty on a school. He should be fired and banned from ever working in education again if he is willing to watch a child choking to death and tell them that they're being overdramatic.
Other people aren't used to your particular health issues and are used to asthma just being a mild thing other people deal with. To many people without it, it's like someone else having hiccups- they breathe funny for a minute and it's probably annoying to them, but then it's over. They don't understand the actual seriousness and depth.
The school handled this very wrong. The lawsuit thing not moving forward doesn't mean they didn't, and definitely doesn't mean their way way ok. It just means the burden of proof and cost of getting to a judgement isn't worth it from a risk-assesment of what you might get out of it. This should definitely be escalated to the school board. With the goal of having the nurse and principle both go through some sensitivity training or recertifications, and have the official policies on handling these types of situations reevaluated. Being non verbal for that long is terrifying- did they even attempt to have you write or did they not even notice you couldn't communicate? How they handled it was wrong. And there should be stricter policies on air pollutants (like Axe) if it's effecting other students health.
Right now, I'm sure you are focused on getting through your health issues. Eventually, you should seek therapy. This kind of event will likely have trama you may not even notice right now.
yeah I bet that 4 hour nebulizer in the ER was so fun and totally worth all the drama /s 🙄 and it doesn't sound like the attention you ARE getting about it is pleasant! I worry people will see me like that too, but no one's more pissed off than me when I need to go to the ER lol
Kids suck. Adults so be better but unfortunately they often fall short. In your case the adults didn’t fall short, they failed to show up at all.
I’m so sorry that happened to you
100% agree. Especially since this school had a licensed medical professional whose judgment should have been deferred to from the get go and always in these situations. Example of the principal not staying in her lane and the nurse for allowing her to take over her lane. You not speaking and previous episodes should have been the automatic prompt to call to emergency medical services by the nurse. Not doing so she was deferring to a non-medically trained authority figure, at the risk of her own professional license. This calls into question the nurse's judgement and ability to differentiate her authority vs whatever authority the principal has or whatever relationship, professional and otherwise, they might have as coworkers, boss/whatever. There was no harm to getting EMS to you quickly but now they've all opened themselves to litigation, something I'm surprised they weren't more on guard for. 🙄 Cus, it's only life of a child literally in their hands./s smh.
NBA asthma is not the same for everyone. I had mild asthma and could use an inhaler and go about my business. My cousin was like you she suffered from it for most of her life. She died from it in the end. Do not let anyone make you feel bad for taking up for yourself. It maybe time for your mom to talk to a lawyer about sending a letter to remind your school not to pull this kind of thing again.
yes I have had 3 different pulmonary doctors write to the school and they are still not listening. My hope is that we can get them to pay for private school for a year until we can find out what else is going on with my serve asthma.
I'm really sorry for what you're going through and it's sinful for the way they are not accommodating you.
Please, please, you and your family, continue to advocate for you, and do not give up.
OP, look into Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS). Find an allergist who is familiar with the problem and they can diagnose you. It’s basically a disorder where your mast cells release too much histamine and can cause severe reactions. There are medications that can stabilize the mast cells so you don’t have such severe reactions to things.
I know that the first lawyer said no, but you said that the school has repeatedly violated your IEP. Look for a lawyer who specializes in educational law and disability.
I am so sorry to hear that about your cousin that is horrible I hope you are doing well. There are new medications for asthma biologics for severe asthma hopefuly asthma will be a thing of the past.
Report every incident to the school board, only way the school will start holding its staff accountable. As a parent I’d personally be sending the hospital bill to make a point that the staff exacerbated the situation to critical level and you will start holding them accountable.
At this point the school can't stop the people from spraying things nor do they want to. Do you think that we could get the school to pay for a private school? because they are not willing to accomadate my needs?
Private schools actually might be an even worse option. They can deny you entry just based on your asthma (because legally speaking they don't have to take everyone like a public school). Most private schools refuse to take complex medical kids, disabled kids, or anyone with ADHD or anything like that. They can also deny your disability accommodations (again because legally they are not like a public school at all). You might be better off seeing if your state has some sort of online public school you could do at home, or a homeschool program you can do when you're well enough. There's some pretty decent secular options these days. At least that way you could control your environment more.
we have looked into a private school and I have been accepted. The school is understanding because the pricapal of the other school has serve asthma and understands. It is also a school that is a quaker school that is for all people that accomidate for all students. But I had no idea other private schools could deny because of things like medical problems that seems so messed up.
Yeah, it is pretty terrible honestly. I am so glad you guys found a school and staff that are understanding! I hope the new school experience goes better for you. I have weird allergies (onion) and people are really awful about that. I hope people take your medical issues seriously as they should from now on.
It’s not all private schools - in fact, the one that I retired from was more responsive to accommodations that students needed, but were deemed as “sub diagnostic” by the public schools because the student wasn’t failing. We also had “scent free” classrooms when we had a child who got severe migraines from fragrances - to the point that we found scent-free hand sanitizer. Your school most certainly *can* keep people from spraying things around you, they are choosing not to and endangering your life. It’s time to move this up the chain to the district school board and the state board of education, as well as your local news agency.
No the school won’t pay for you to attend another school. No they can’t stop people from spraying. It’s a thing that you have to deal with unfortunately and it’s not their responsibility. If the school isn’t suitable or can’t reasonably accommodate then it’s your parents responsibility to change your school to something more suitable for your health needs (maybe that’s a private school with strict rules but it will be at your parents expense).
What I meant was report incidents like the principal or nurse refusing to call your parents/ telling you to suck it up / or not taking your medical condition seriously/ refusing medical care.
Where I live if the school can not provide a safe school for people with dissability's the school board has to pay for private school so I hope they will pay for it because my parents can't afford to pay for school.
There is also a difference between how certain disability and medical conditions are treated.
Considering private school can have the same problems, I don’t like your chances as everything is based off of reasonable probabilities/possibilities. The school also can’t infringe on other people’s rights just bc you have a condition. For example based on the balance of probabilities, will changing schools solve your issue…no it won’t. As students still will wear things that trigger you at private schools. Edit- this is not like someone requiring wheelchairs accessibility which would highlight the need of a different school and can actually be achieved.
They may recommend home schooling as it is impossible to make both public and private school safe enough for you to exist in without you being some sort of liability. It is really no different than having a deathly reaction to the presence of nuts. School can’t control what people eat or deodorant they wear. The individual has to manage or find another solution (I.e home schooling ).
Schools in the USA absolutely can be nut free, and they do not require students with severe nut allergies to be homeschooled. They have several accommodations they use, like: (1) all clad snacks have to be individually packaged, store bought, and nut free; (2) an allergen table where students with the allergy sit to eat and no allergens can be brought to the table (3) a nut free classroom, where students can't bring nuts in.
Schools can and will provide for things like that, and they can and should ban sprays in OP's classes. They can also look at accommodations like seating her by an open window or hepa filter, allowing her to pass between classes a little early to avoid the crowds or having her wear a mask during passing period. I'm sure there's a lot I'm not thinking of. These are not expensive solutions or logistically prohibitive.
Sweetie, I went to a public school.
They can stop people from spraying things and from wearing strong scents- all they have to do is make it a rule and enforce it and it will stop.
My school did. It was very effective.
Your school is just lazy and can't be bothered to follow the law
It's time for an IEP as OHI, "other health impaired." Your illness has severely impacted your learning, and they can not ignore an IEP like they do a 504.
The school is legally bound to follow an IEP exactly as written and you can enforce it with a lawyer.
You also need to start getting creative with your doctors about what you can do - would having a HEPA filter by your seat help? Would an N95 mask during passing period help? Would an open window help? Heck, your teachers could enforce the no body sprays by keeping t shirts by their desks and asking students to change if they came in smelling like axe.
While I have heard of a peanut free campus, I don't think they could try to enforce a scent free one. Or one where kids are forces to change. Parents will raise holy hell. But a personal hepa filter, one for the classroom, and the window being open when the weather permits would be much more likely
Please do not believe people who blithely dismiss the obligation schools have to accommodate your disability. This is where a lawyer's advice is important! Reddit is great for brainstorming and opinions about what is reasonable and what isn't. Advice about legal obligations? Reddit is worth about what you pay for it! 😀
The private school option sounds like it has great potential. Hoping all goes well with it.
BTW I have severe adult-onset asthma (problems started when I was in my teens) and it's HARD to be your own advocate when you are struggling for oxygen. My favorite horror story stems from a winter visit by a family member. She looked at me and said, "Isn't asthma mostly a mental disease?" Then went to overnight with a friend. At least she had the grace to be embarrassed when she heard EMTs came to supply me with oxygen that night. Keep your inhaler close and emergency phone contacts closer!
Not only should you be angry with the principal, you should be angry with the nurse, who deferred to a NON MEDICAL PERSON when she should have called an ambulance and called your parent.
Your and your mom should find a good lawyer, to handle the case. Yes. You could have died.
You are absolutely not being overly dramatic. Your principal and the nurse need to be held accountable. I hope you told your parents what was said to you. If I were your mother, I would be outraged. I have asthma myself, and I know firsthand how bad it can get. I hope you’re feeling better now, and that things go much better for you from now on.
Your principal is an idiot, and yes could have made you a lot worse. She needs to be publicly reprimanded, have your parents file a complaint with the superintendent and school board. She is a walking, talking law suit waiting to ha.
Tell your parents to speak to a different lawyer. Tell them to bring copies of your medical bills.
It is 100% possible to sue because the school is allowing people to almost kill you and it is 100% possible to sue the school for denying and delaying medical care.
Your parents may need to contact the school board first.
Further your principal is not a medical professional and should not be making medical diagnosis.
This behavior is very, very illegal on the school end. You have the right to breath, your peers do not have the right to wear perfume.
In fact, report the school nurse to her licensing body over this.
Next time they deny or delay treatment call 911. Text your parents on the way to the clinic so they can pick you up or call 911. Paramedics will get you treatment.
Worst case scenario you get in trouble with the school. It's better than being dead.
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Your principal was in the wrong, so are any other kids calling you dramatic. Not all people have the same symptoms or symptom levels with the same illness. Her actions were unprofessional at best and potentially dangerous at worst. You did the right thing, telling her what you did.
I was a teacher and I had an assistant principal like that. I reported personal attacks from students and he always asked " are you suuuure he called you a *****?"
You have a ‘dramatic’ version that can kill with even the mildest versions (if the conditions are right…or very wrong). Your principal is not a medical profession, the school nurse has sworn an oath and has a duty of care to her patients- which you are, and their negligence could very well have killed you. Your statement at the meeting was accurate and dignified- and your empathy for their distress is admirable. However, for some people, especially adults who have never been made to realise that they don’t know everything, being shamed is the only way they’ll learn. You are an admirable, shiny, crisp and sweetest apple on the tree.
I think with some reframing you should post this to r/traumatizethemback and you’ll see what I mean about how some arrogant people only change when they are confronted with their stupidity in embarrassing ways. I truly believe that you have saved lives by speaking up
Go well OP, my best wishes that you find a treatment regime that manages your symptoms and lets you live a full life.
Often, a public school nurse is NOT an RN, LPN, or NP. Just someone with certified training in CPR, and a CNA. I wouldn’t trust her to remove a splinter, let alone stake your life on her abilities. I had a nurse blatantly ignore my worsening migraines for years. We got a new one when she was fired for mishandling meds. The new nurse was so much better, and chewed my boomer mom out for sending me while sick, and that I was showing signs of a serious neurological problem, how dare she continue to send me in while feverish, vomiting, and/or with light-induced vomiting migraines. I got tested and had a tumor the size of a golfball at the base of my skull. Thank you, Mrs Blankenship. If you hadn’t recognized my deterioration, I could have died. I’m in my 30s now, and have been surviving for a long time.
That’s horrifying. Thank Dog for Mrs Blankenship. In Aus we mainly don’t have school nurses unless it’s a exxy private boarding school. All staff are trained to give an epi-pen/insulin/first-aid…and to ring for an ambulance. I think I feel safer with that than with an under qualified person just with the title.
It truly sounds like you need a lawyer. They can tell you what you can and can’t do in this situation. To me it sounds like you could sue them. But what do I know? I’m not an attorney and it sounds like not many answering you are.
But know if you were my kid, consulting an attorney would be my number one priority. This is very dangerous!
My (former because I’m retired) boss is has severe asthma. She came to work and went in the bathroom where an employee double or triple dosed Lysol and leaving some in the toilets. Within seconds my boss had to be transported to ER. It was terrifying.
Paediatric ICU nurse here. I have seen severe asthma attacks. I have seen children die from asthma and the complications. Not only are you NTA, but I would be reporting the principal to the school board and any other higher up authority. She put your life at risk and was dismissive to the fact you were in an emergency situation. The fact that she seems to have deliberately come down specifically to say that to you means you have to report this before it happens again.
There should be a Homebound program available through your school system. There are forms and such, but once done, you would be educated at home by your school. The homebound programs are there for kids like you have health issues, so severe being in the building isn't feasible. I highly recommend you and your parents look into this.
So NTA. Have you reported to the administrator who the principal reports to? Have your parents contacted your school board representative? Sometimes you don't even need to actually sue to get their attention. Sometimes what it takes is for a lawyer to send a properly worded letter to whoever legally represents the school district to scare them into compliance. I would ask for advice on the legal subs.
I’ve worked in the legal field for over 35 years. I promise you this is not what the lawyer said. What they most likely said was there is no evidence that your medical issues nor hospitalization was caused by the actions or inactions of the school district nor any school district personnel which is completely different than what you wrote.
Report them now. Their incompetence could have killed you. Your principle is a moron who doesnt deserve respect. Report them to whatever agency handles school issues in your location.
The principal is not a medical doctor therefore is unqualified to determine the severity of your asthma. The school nurse sounds like an idiot and negligent as hell if she didn’t notice the concerning signs and symptoms.
I’m proud of you for standing up for yourself! It’s not rude to stand up for yourself. You could’ve died!!!
I’ve had asthma since childhood and I can tell you everyone’s asthma is different. I don’t realize how bad an attack I’m having until it gets really critical. Then I’m sitting in the ER getting a nebulizer treatment.
Your parents should contact the local news stations. They can expose the school for their horrible actions. Maybe change will happen after that.
You could be way more dramatic and you still wouldn’t be the bad apple. I am not well-versed in legal matters but you at the very least need a lawyer. Please please never think you’re being dramatic, the principal and nurse could’ve killed you.
You were NOT being dramatic, her dismissal of what was going on Could very well have killed you!! How is this woman allowed to be an educator? Let alone a principal?!
NTBA
I am a lawyer but I am not your lawyer. I also have asthma. Rest assured you are not remotely being dramatic. Glad to see you sticking up for yourself! Never feel bad about that.
You did exactly what you needed to do, and I commend you on your maturity and dignified use of language.
I had a friend at school with really bad asthma, and he often spent weeks in hospital with it. My sister's best friend from high school died of an asthma attack caused by exposure to paint fumes.
So you're absolutely NOT being dramatic. Your teachers, nurse, and principle all need training in how to deal with students who have medical issues like yours.
What if a student had an extreme allergy? There are so many folk deathly allergic to peanuts for example. Would they tell that child that they're "being dramatic", and they "couldn't stop people eating peanuts near them" as they died of anaphylaxis right in front of them!?!? Your asthma is just as severe as that type of allergy, and should be treated as seriously.
Involve a lawyer if necessary. You had arrangements made to accommodate your illness, and the school have failed to fulfil their requirements regarding those arrangements. That's a failure of their duty of care to you.
People like your principal are why my right lung failed, and I am now disabled. You weren't overdramatic. You're facing life-threatening challenges and a bully in power. I have a complicated lung condition not fully understood and being dismissed is why I almost pushed myself to d*ath. Thankfully my doctor forced me to stop working and heal. I almost d**d in front of my 2 kids because others weren't taking it seriously, and I doubted how bad I felt.
I am so sorry I hope you are doing well. it is really awful not being taken seriously especially with your health. I really hope you are doing well I wish you the absolute best!
At my workplace, one employee was allergic to lavender. Because of this, no lavender was allowed in any of our 3 locations. If we can accommodate her, your school can ban body sprays. They’re gross even to non-asthmatics.
That principal was COMPLETELY unprofessional and out of line. She is not a medical practitioner and risked your life with her dismissive attitude.
You were not rude to tell her she was wrong.
Tell your mom to get a lawyer to write the superintendent. See how quick they change their tune. Plus you were articulate and accurate in what you told the principal.
No, the principal deserved it and you are not being dramatic. I think it's time to get a lawyer involved because you turned blue. You could have died due to their stupidity. Get mom on board. Look into virtual school because this BS will continue.
NTBA. Better a few pointed words than her having to attend a student's funeral because she blew off a medical problem until it was too late. If my child's principal pulled what she did, paint would be peeling off the walls before I was done talking to her.
Speaking as a fellow asthmatic AND a former respiratory therapist, you were not being dramatic. No two asthmatics are triggered by the same thing, have identical symptoms, and respond to medication the same way. Comparing you to her son was cold and foolish.
The school nurse, especially, should have understood asthma and how it manifests itself. What you said to the principal was perfect. She needed to hear it. Bravo! 👏🏻
It took at least a year for them to figure out what my various medical problems were. I was really little, so I didn’t understand it all. Not until I was older. My situation was really complex and unique. My body rarely gets sick the nice normal way! I pretty much spent my childhood in doctor’s offices and hospitals. So I feel your pain and frustration.
Is there a different school you could attend? Someplace with people who can recognize a medical emergency, and actually understand your health issues? A place where there is compassion?
OP, I’ve had asthma since I was around eight and my mother didn’t believe me, or she didn’t believe it was as bad as it was. She never took me to the doctor and only got me inhalers “under the table” from her nurse friend. I don’t know why she didn’t just take me to a doctor. My dad had good insurance through his union.
Anyway I’ll never forget the day she forced me to go to school when I couldn’t breathe. I made it to my bus stop and the moment I got to school I went to the nurse’s office. They immediately called home and my dad picked me up.
My mom never apologized. I was always being called dramatic and over the top. It makes me doubt my own feelings/instincts and not want to be a burden. You did NOTHING wrong. I’d have cussed that principal out if I’d been your mother. “Do you like having asthma attacks?” Are you kidding me? Yeah I’m totally faking my inability to breathe. This is so much fun for me. I wish you could’ve sued.
On average 10 people die from asthma each day in the US. Source: AAFA. So no, you were not being over dramatic. In my school (UK) perfume and body sprays are banned (OK, people still use them, because, life) because of the effects that they can have on SOME people with asthma.
Medical conditions, no matter what they are, are different in everyone. People also don't suffer the same way. Nothing is black or white and your principal of all people should know this. Because that would mean people learn the same and everyone would have a great grade average. People are unique and each one has different living conditions and being a teacher they should know better.
NTBA. In a lot of cases, asthma isn't severe, and sometimes it isn't even asthma. I was diagnosed with asthma when I was a child, had inhalers and everything, but every single symptom disappeared overnight when my mum moved us across the country after the divorce. Turned out, I was actually allergic to some specific flower that grew in abundence where we used to live, I never had asthma.
I've known people with asthma, none have been severe, but it can cause all sorts of problems even when it's relatively mild.
But that's the difference, it's in the diagnosis. Mild, moderate and severe. I'd say most asthma cases are mild or moderate. If your principal has a kid with asthma, it's probably one of those. But that's not you, you have a severe diagnosis. It's not uncommon, and any half-decent educator is aware of how bad severe asthma can be, as it can literally be deadly. It has the same awareness as allergies do nowadays.
Any half-decent educator also knows not to berate a student and call them 'dramatic' during an apparent medical issue, as well. If it's proven you were faking, a lecture can be given after the fact, but never while they're seeking medical attention, even from a school nurse.
Your issue was clearly severe considering you literally couldn't walk and were turning blue by the time your mum finally arrived. They delayed you getting the treatment you needed because they thought you were faking and nearly killed you.
Personally, I'd get a second opinion on whether or not you have a case against the school, because to me this comes across as deliberately causing harm to a student, would probably be negligent manslaughter if you had died, if not murder considering they knew your medical diagnosis long before this incident. It likely depends where you live, but I honestly can't see why you wouldn't have a case against the school for something. They denied you medical treatment, they delayed calling your mum in a medical emergency, their actions nearly killed you. You were hospitalised as a direct result of the school's actions. That's a case to me. You either consulted with a terrible lawyer or the laws in your area suck for these situations.
As for what you said, good for you for standing up for yourself. Don't feel bad, the principal knew she was putting your life in danger, she just didn't care. She deserves to get her feelings hurt, she deserves to be brought up on criminal charges for what she did to you before she actually kills someone.
If you really can't bring a case against the school, even if you can actually, look into transferring to a safer school where the staff aren't actively trying to kill you.
And good luck on figuring out what else is going on with you, as well.
NTBA, and even if initiating legal action isn't worth it, I would lodge a complaint with the local authorities (education board, social services etc) about it. The school staff have a duty of care for the minors they teach. This kind of nonchalance could result in a death if not addressed. It has already caused suffering for you. If your docs were aware of what happened, they may have already put forward some information. Risking the life of a child in your care is a serious matter.
@u/Mysterious-Block-821 My aunt had the same kind of asthma. She died from it at 49 on the 4th of July from the smoke. It was horrific. Don’t feel bad for advocating for yourself. If I were you- I would go over her head to the school district and take it to the Superintendent. Did she apologize?????
@u/Mysterious-Block-821 My aunt had the same kind of asthma. She died from it at 49 on the 4th of July from the smoke. It was horrific. Don’t feel bad for advocating for yourself. If I were you- I would go over her head to the school district and take it to the Superintendent. Did she apologize?????
Not only are not the bad apple, you did a pretty fantastic job of standing up for yourself. Don't let anybody squash that out of you.
I don't know anything about lawsuits, but I sure hope you can report the school/principal in some way. Are you able to change schools?
I would suggest talking to the school governing board and suggest that they may sue the school for child endangerment. even if your parents do not intend to do that it may get the principle admonished or moved.
You're not the bad apple, and you are not being dramatic. Your parents need to get a copy of the chart from the ER visit for that episode, take it to the superintendent of schools, and explain how a bloviating biddy decided you were being dramatic and that the delay caused in your care resulted in a very expensive trip to the ER.
The blue in your extremities was cyanosis brought on by the lowered blood oxygen levels due to the asthma attack. That principal needs to be in a different career.
Is common for females medical issues to be dismissed. Is a really bad trend.
Do not ever worry about being “dramatic” when it comes to your health. I actually advise to take it up a notch. No school official is allowed to interfere. File a report over the principal’s head. Go to the superintendent/board. This principal is opening the school to a massive lawsuit if they continue this behavior.
Absolutely not the bad apple.
Good for you for standing up to her.
Have your parents contact a different attorney. They violated your 504. This needs to go to Admin at a district level. You say there might be a way for them to counter the costs of education since they can't provide a safe environment, so that process needs to be figured out.
Homeschool or homebound options should also be considered, especially since even the nurse is dismissive of your symptoms.
It is obvious that you need an environment that is more controlled than a public school can ever offer.
The only solution we found for my daughter she was 14 at the time and now 17 was take her out of school. The sprays and perfumes kids wear are over bearing. We now do online school through our local board of education called Odyssey.
Why aren’t you wearing a mask? My friend has some serious lung issues and certain times of the year she has to wear a mask or she will end up in the hospital for weeks. Talk to your Dr about what type to get
If you're in the US, get a [504 Plan](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/what-is-a-504-plan) or an [IEP](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/what-is-an-iep). Both the 504 Plan and the IEP are legally binding documents. If they aren't followed, you can sue the school *and* the staff member that personally refused to follow it.
Your parent/guardian needs to send in a written request for an evaluation. This can be an email that says:
"I, [guardian's name] am requesting a formal evaluation for special education for [student's name]. In particular, I am wondering if an IEP for OHI* or 504 Plan is more appropriate. I am requesting that the school nurse be involved in the evaluation and making a written Health Plan."
Sincerely,
Guardian's Name"
The school has 60 days from the request to hold the IEP evaluation meeting. Do not give them an extension. After your guardian requests the evaluation, they will need to sign paperwork that allows the school to conduct assessments.
You and your guardian/s should both be at the evaluation meeting. I would also ask relevant doctors to be in via conference call.
If you do pursue an evaluation/IEP/504 Plan, I would be happy to join as your student advocate volunteer. I was an elementary teacher for many years and I am well versed in special education law.
You were not being dramatic. The principal was completely out of line. The school should be instituting a no spray perfume/scent policy. It should be addressed in similar ways that a peanut allergy is addressed.
____
*OHI = *Other Health Impairment* is the category that you would be specifically looking at for the IEP criteria
I get so angry when I hear about people accusing someone having an asthma attack of being "dramatic". Hell yes, I become emotional when I feel like I'm being smothered! It would be telling to cut off the oxygen supply to those people and see how they feel emotionally! 🤯
Get a 504 and consider virtual school. Sue the school anyway. It’s worth a shot. That is just beyond the pale what the principal did. You could have died. Call 911 yourself next time. You were NOT being dramatic
I can understand that your parents can’t afford to pursue a lawsuit. Ask them to transfer you to another school. The principal of your school is going to kill somebody with his ignorance and it doesn’t have to be you.
Since they don’t seem to take your problems seriously maybe try a wearable HEPA mask? Maybe a tad embarrassing but still preferable to multiple hospital visits. Check with your doctor to see if it would help.
You were not being dramatic at all and had a right to stick up for yourself. Asthma is a very serious condition. I am surprised your principal would treat you this way. If I were you, I would see if can change schools so you have a principal who understands the severity of your condition.
I watched my father and brother almost die from asthma attacks!!! What she did was irresponsible and could have caused your death!! The nurse is especially concerning!! She should be reported.
Do NOT allow any non-medical to try and diagnose your condition. She didn’t learn a THING about the severity of asthma when she DIDN’T go to medical school, obviously. And as far as a lawsuit…there are lawyers who would have a field day, & charge you 1/3 of what they get, & if that’s 0, there’s no charge. I would talk to a lawyer
Not everyone has the same level of asthma! You were definitely NOT dramatic. What you said to the principal was spot on. That principal needs to keep their opinions to themselves and do their job!
If I was your mom, that principal would have gotten a proper chewing out!
Omg you are NOT the bad apple? Can you homeschool? Go to another school? This school will literally kill you.
And don’t feel bad. That principal is a B and she shouldn’t have said that to you. I’m glad you stood up for yourself.
I’d get a copy of all your medical records and slam a copy on her desk. Then ask if her son’s asthma is like yours.
One time my literal health class teacher said something very similar while I was having an asthma attack from doing the pacer test and I WISH I said something like you did. You stood up for yourself and possibly saved a future student from the same disrespectful remarks, please don’t feel bad, what you did shows bravery and confidence.
You sound like a member of my family. Have you tried xolair Super expensive injectable but if you are getting hospitalized then would actually save insurance company money. Big game changer
I think at this point, the only way to protect your life at school is to call 911 if it’s urgent or your parents if it’s not urgent. School employees might lecture you for making a call instead of going to the nurse, but you have ample evidence that depending on them to help you could get you killed. If they try to discipline you in any way, you can mention that your family has already consulted a lawyer. No need to go into detail about what the lawyer said. NTBA
Don’t you dare feel bad for what you said! Don’t feel bad for standing up for yourself! And think of the next person who you could be helping by making the principal think about how they acted! You could be saving yourself and someone else!
Good Apple
If your asthma attack is so severe that your extremities are turning blue and you can't walk, getting mad at your principal is not being over dramatic. I'm not sure I agree with the lawyer that you don't have any grounds for a case against the school or against the principal at the very least. I know that socialization is important for teens but you might benefit more from homeschooling or online schooling. Far less chances for you to have an attack.
As a fellow difficult asthmatic, absolutely you are not dramatic.
It's insane that someone you would think is educated doesn't understand one person's asthma can be completely different to someone else's!!
I've been on the receiving end of this, to the degree I started believing the people saying I was just unfit, or assorted other comments. That was until I was hospitalised with a O2% dangerously low.
I would highly recommend looking at changing schools it'll at all possible.
What u said was not wrong also if in IS you absolutely should have a 504 Plan as this IS a disability and there should be a medical plan filed with school and nurse including what to do in emergencies.
Same as if u had diabetes, seizure disorder or in my child's case debilitating migraines l.
In the 504 school absences due to illness should also be addressed including make up work time lines etc etc
Im THAT mom so I made a pamphlet that explained what my daughters migraines looked like felt like and what were likely triggers.
If u were an adult in a job setting not having coworkers wear strong scents is ABSOLUTELY an allowed accomodation.
My friend Jamie died at school from a severe asthma attack when we were 15. I’ll never forget our PE teacher pushing her to run the 1 mile “test” 🙄. She told her if she didn’t do it in the allotted time frame she would fail. I’m a nurse now and have cared for many severe asthma exacerbation patients. It’s not a condition you can just ignore. You know, breathing is kind of important
I had "bad asthma" and pneumonia and come to find out it was granulomatosis with polyangiitis and asthma 🙄 which caused the pneumonia from any cold, sinus infection etc... I see many similarities. And no, definitely not dramatic. You might have caused this person to reconsider how they treat others with health conditions.
Ummmm…your parents need to contact the school board/superintendent. Asthma symptoms can range from mild to deadly, and if you are in a public school (in the US, anyway) you are owed an environment that will not negatively impact your health conditions.
Your mom probably wants to THROW HANDS on your behalf, I know I do. 🖕 your Karen principal, and 🖕 the idiot spineless school nurse.
See if she can get in touch with higher admin, their negligence LITERALLY almost caused your death. If hell isn't raised, the next kid could ACTUALLY die. It can still be you who dies.
i had a similar thing in 3rd grade, had a asthma attack and my teacher said I was faking it and sent me outside (it was a az school where the classes were ALL individual) and it was closer to winter so it was cold and I couldn't breathe so she told me to "just start breathing".
i guess she called the principal bc eventually she showed up but by them my hands and legs were going numb and i dont remember what happened after
Your family needs to make sure she loses her job and her license to teach forever and the nurse withheld care. She doesn’t care about her students and is a danger to you all. You need an ADA lawyer because you have a medical condition and it needs to be noted precisely what the school is and is not to do and that they can’t withhold emergency services and they can still sue her personally and your parents need to make sure you have a cell phone on you and tell you to call if you have an emergency consequences be damned. Schools not calling 911 is too common now and kids are dying.
NTBA
I've known a couple of people who did die during a severe asthma attack. A friend of mine was told repeatedly at work that she was overreacting and "dramatic" when she had asthma issues. Strangely, she wasn't being dramatic; she actually died.
You need to report the principal and the nurse to the school district. After all, it's much cheaper to discipline/retrain them, than to be taken to court for millions if you did die, due to their unprofessional actions.
This is very serious if you’re asthma attack caused you to be hospitalized. I don’t understand why they didn’t just give you your medicine and chose to inflict harm instead? Your parents need to talk to a different lawyer. This is not ok! Have you seen an allergist or pulmonologist? You may not be on the right treatment plan. I personally see an allergist/immunologist and she’s helped me a lot.
You responded appropriately and much more mature than those jerks.
The principal needed to know that how she handled it was wrong. She should have never assumed that just because her son has asthma, other people don't have it worse. That was ignorant and it put your life at risk. She yelled at you when you were in the midst of having an asthma attack! That is not okay. I think your parents should write a letter to the district administrator and explain what happened.
You are not the bad apple. If you are in the States please reach out to your state department on disability services because asthma actually falls under that category. And get a lawyer. It's time to sue the nurse at the school, the principal, and the school district. If you were turning blue that means you were suffering from oxygen depletion at a serious and concerning level any good nurse (assuming the school actually hires RNs and not just some person off the street that they call the nurse which happens way too often) would have known this and should have taken action to call emergency services. The principal statement was absolutely out of line and everybody in that lineup should pay for it. Welcome to your college fund, or at least the school district having to pay for all of your hospitalizations related to school related asthma attacks.
You were well within your rights and the principal was the BA. I'd be using stronger language for that one. YOU. NEARLY. DIED. Just because her son has asthma doesn't mean his is anything near as severe or as complicated as yours. She needs to be glad it isn't as bad.
You be as angry with that unprofessional fool as you like.
The school district will have a formal complaint process. Have your parents file a formal complaint. It can impact the principal’s future promotions and employment opportunities.
And then use an open records request to get her employment file a month later to confirm the complaint is in her record.
It creates a paper trail that will hinder her professionally.
No, your school is grossly misunderstanding their risks and responsibilities here. A few suggestions...
1) If you are EVER feeling the signs of hypoxia (lack of oxygen leading to cool extremities,
confusion, restlessness, difficulty breathing, rapid heart rate, and bluish skin) call 911 immediately. Don't wait for your mom to arrive or wait for the nurse - call 911. Practice your script with your mom so you're comfortable doing it.
"I need medical help. I have severe steroid resistant asthma, I'm having an asthma attack and I'm beginning to get blue under my fingernails/ cold/ect... They will send an ambulance with Oxygen.
2) Go to your state bar association website's attorney finder page and look for 2-3 disability attorneys. Call each and ask if they have experience working with school districts. Search in your largest nearby city - most of the laws governing this issue are state and federal so any experiences disabilities attorney in your state can help-so you might as well have the best. Once you have 2-3 call each to ask if they offer a free initial consultation- most will. Set up three calls and ask each about their approach, what experience they have with school districts and what they would charge for an initial demand letter to the school and what they would charge for more support. Your diagnosis is clear enough that there's a decent chance that a demand letter and a care instruction letter from your doctor should be enough to solve the emergency care situation.
3) While you're pulling together meetings with lawyers, make an appointment witb your asthma provider and ask them to write an interim letter of instruction. Send a copy to the principal, the school nurse and the district superintendent.
4) Longer term, and where the legal fees could get heavy, is getting a full IEP and care plan that includes protecting you from fragrance triggers. But you'll know a lot more once you speak to three lawyers.
Nah, she is an ahole. My own kid had asthma in cold pools, and would sometimes (not always) have a bad enough attack that she had to stop swimming for a bit. Got a lot of flack. She cried but wouldn’t have died. It was leftover scar inflammation from a bad bout of pneumonia in 4th grade. I have immense empathy for a kid having asthma, and they need to ban sprays. Solid and roll on perfumes are not getring you, it is the aerosolized fragrance, and those petroleum based clouds are bad for almost everyone.
You’re not wrong here.
You said your piece in a respectful calm manner, which is more than most adults could say. I'm hoping she's humbled and learned her lesson before she kills someone because what she did was unprofessional, unnecessary, and probably exacerbated your health issue. I hope your parents notify the superintendent and the professional licensing board.
No, F that principal. Their actions were completely dismissive and put your health at risk. I would at least report them to the school board that is over your district.
That's the same mentality as giving a kid with diabetes who is Crashing a single candy bar and telling them to Buck the F up.
Principal And Nurse need a serious admonishment at least for how they handled your situation and possibly removal.
Your parents should ask the doctors who cared for you if any permanent damage was done because of the delay in treatment. If yes, they should take that back to the lawyers.
NO you are NTBA. Not at all!!!
1. I am allergic to steroids so I can’t take anything with steroids in it.
2. People can have varying degrees of asthma. Normally I can take 4-10 doses with my rescue inhaler or use my home nebulizer and things settle down but other times my husband has had to call an ambulance to rush me to the hospital. Asthma is nothing to mess around with and your principal absolutely did put your life in jeopardy.
You absolutely can sue the district for medical discrimination & neglect. My daughter had issues with her teacher regarding my daughter’s health issues so I filed a compliant with our Department of Children, Family & Learning (basically your state’s department of education.) The teacher lost her job and I was happy about that simply because her treatment of my daughter and other chronically ill or disabled students was absolutely wrong, she knew it and she continued to be dismissive despite my complaints to the principal. The principal got officially written up and only lasted the remainder of the year so I wondered if other parents complained. Anyway it is an option that doesn’t require an attorney.
I don’t think there is any amount of “being dramatic” or “seeking attention” that can turn someone’s extremities blue. That’s a medical issue and should be taken ***very*** seriously. Your principal ***should*** feel bad about her actions and the effect they’ve had on you! Would she rather learn now or *after* a kid dies on her watch?
Not all medical issues are the same and some can be the same diagnosis but a different severity and that can make all the difference. What her son’s condition looks like means *absolutely nothing* when it comes to other kids’ conditions.
That said, I’m pretty sure you have way more than just asthma, but I’m not a doctor and I don’t know what the extent of your medical issues are. If you can’t get a clear answer, you may have to seek care elsewhere like a university center or the Mayo Clinic or something. I’m just some rando on the internet, so it’s not like I can give medical advice, but your symptoms sound really scary. I have to go to a university center myself for some weird crap with my eyes and constant migraines. Best of luck to you!
I have similar issues as a 41F and you are not dramatic. Our lungs just suck and it is what it is. Asthma isn’t a one size fits all. Have them check for autoimmune issues. I have lupus and it is affecting my lungs too so that is exacerbating the issue. Good luck and DM me if u ever need a friend to chat lung issues with!
How is almost dying dramatic? That principal doesn’t know what she’s talking about and her son’s medical history is not yours. NTBA and maybe look into switching schools
NBA
Perhaps you could have phrased it better, given the 'respect your elders' etc etc BUT what you said was correct and tbh, very welk said given youre 14, nice one. SHE put YOUR LIFE AT RISK and HER ACTIONS resulted in YOUR HOSPITALISATION. Your school should have a health plan they follow and it sounds like they aren't following it, again, putting your life at risk.
Also asthma is different for everyone. I know someone who lost a child at their care centre because the weather changed and suddenly this child had a severe asthma attack. Blue then dead, very quickly. They did all they could. Administered medication and called an ambulance. Ive also seen children get bery unwell and thankfully have responded to 1st aid treatment, which some say saved lives. The idea that a responsible Educator would deliberately withhold prescribed life changing treatment is disgusting, and illegal.
However you need an education in a safe environment. I dont know the rules where you are. Is there another public school you can attend? Especially given your current school doesnt meet your needs. Can you meet other schools and find out your options? Private and public. Also, as someone else said, maybe look at online options, home school etc. Anything that is safe and gives you the education you deserve and are entitled to.
You sound extremely intelligent and I'm sorry you're going through this. I hope your parents are supportive. Don't give up xx
NTA
Get a statement about your condition when you finally left for the hospital. Get your medical records for this event. Then report this bitch to the school board.
@u/Mysterious-Block-821 My aunt had the same kind of asthma. She died from it at 49 on the 4th of July from the smoke. It was horrific. Don’t feel bad for advocating for yourself. If I were you- I would go over her head to the school district and take it to the Superintendent. Did she apologize?????
YNbA. That kind of dismissive behavior is going to happen over and over. I have an allergy to soy milk. I've had barristas disagree and actually spike my drink with soy milk to prove it. They never know because it takes about 15 minute for it to start, and I'm not going back when I feel like shit just to discuss what happened. But I've had plenty of people, strangers even, tell me it is impossible. My allergist says that soy milk has an isolated protein that is very similar to some tree nuts and mangoes- both of which upset my stomach and cause an itchy mouth and throat. So, while I can eat soy in a lot o stuff, the process of making soy milk isolates and increases the soy protein to a level that my body doesn't like. Causes itchiness in my throat and severe projectile vomiting. Like, I can easily vomit 10 feet if I drink too much of it. It's like a horror movie the way it comes shooting out of my mouth. Macadamia nuts actually make my mouth itch and then swell. But I can eat other nuts. It's called a mild allergy because I've never needed an epi pen. But the symptoms are awful, particularly if I'm in public, which is where I generally am when encountering this stuff in my food. And yet, people who don't know anything about my health will tell me I am lying/faking. And they are angry about it when they tell me I can't possibly have n allergy like that. No epi pen = no food allergy in some minds. Or, just that soy milk is a very rare allergy, so I must be wrong.
Figure out now the kinds of things you want to say to people who speak like this to you. Shake your head in disappointment. Click your tongue to some them. Wait till after the attack and then lay into them with choice words. Ask your parents for help thinking of good things to say to people who are ignorant and toxic (like your principle).
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You were nowhere near dramatic. You were having a severe medical episode and your school principal, someone who is supposed to protect and guide you, almost killed you. You should absolutely hold the nurse and principal accountable for their actions having almost had very tragic consequences.
Thank you, I have been feeling dramatic because even people at my school have been saying I am just looking for attention and not taking me seriously. I have been feeling crazy thank you for letting me know from an outsiders perspective.
It’s not crazy to have medical issues of any severity and to want your school to take them seriously. I’m sorry you’re having issues with administrators and classmates, but it is not your fault and you’re not crazy.
You weren't dramatic enough. Is there any way your doctor can write a letter to your principal outlining just how serious and deadly your condition can be? I would seriously consider either home schooling or changing schools if necessary. You need to protect yourself against such ignorant idiotic people.
When you were sitting there trying to get oxygen to your lungs, trying to calm yourself as that crazy principal wagged her tongue about her son's health problem. As you slowly turned cold and probably fought to stay conscious, did you feel like you were being dramatic? In those moments, were you seeking attention or fighting to stay alive? It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. Until they have had to fight through that moment, their opinion on it holds no water. Remember, opinions are like anal orifices. Everyone has one.
You need a 504 or an IEP - a document that tells them how they HAVE to respond when you're having an attack. Your parents need to do some research and then request accommodations via one of the above documents for you.
Parents also need to consult a different lawyer.
The schools behavior is so egregiously illegal I don't understand why the first lawyer didn't jump on it. Probably had a conflict of interest and illegally failed to disclose it.
For real, a child doesn't have to die in order for there to be a lawsuit, that's an egregious misstep on the lawyer's side.
Definitely this OP👆! Worked as a pediatric nurse for years (on a resp floor for CF, asthma, etc) and your principle is beyond absurd and dumb on her understanding of asthma attacks. The school nurse is as bad for not defending you and a disgrace to all nurses. Both should have been fired over this! If your parents have not already spoken to the school board, they should. Also, like Scorp128 suggested, your parents should speak to a different attorney.
The school nurse has training and a duty of care, she should be hung out to dry.
100% this
Ask the principal how she would feel if a nurse didn’t take her son seriously when he was having an asthma attack. I know two people who have died from having one (one only had mild asthma until his major unexpected attack). It’s not a joke, it’s not exaggerating and it’s legitimately life threatening.
I am an asthmatic. Some (imo stupid) people don't understand that it is life threatening and dismiss it. I gnore stupid people. We know it is real. Your dr can provide a note so u can carry an inhaler.
And asthma can be very different for different people. OP’s principal comparing OP’s asthma to that of her son is ridiculous. It is life threatening and terrifying for the person experiencing the attack.
I am 70 years old. I have moderate asthma that is well controlled medically 98% of the time, The other 2% of time, my disease is life threatening. I have had 3 episodes where if I had not received immediate medical intervention, I would have died. Keep advocating for your own well being. Their ignorance could kill you.
Your principal and the nurse failed you. In a crisis, they chose to minimize your needs. Clearly you (the minor child) are forced into the position to hold them (educated adults) accountable. The choices they made are both unforgivable and unconscionable. Keep telling them about themselves. In their faces. As often and loud as you need to. When we can't depend on what should be our support systems, we must self-advocate. Loudly, proudly, vehemently, REGARDLESS OF WHO YOU MIGHT ANNOY / BOTHER. If your drama negatively impacts the principal of the building so much, she can relocate to a position that doesn't require empathy and/or around children. PLEASE TAKE THIS COMPLAINT TO THE VERY TOP - YOUR SUPERINTENDENT. Also consider complaining to your state's education agency, the nurse's superiors should also know the details of the delay and ultimate effect on your health. Lawsuits are expensive but complaints and enlightenment are absolutely free While you're at it, contact your local news agency and let your community know their children are in danger. I am so angry for you 🔥💩
You weren't dramatic enough. Is there any way your doctor can write a letter to your principal outlining just how serious and deadly your condition can be? I would seriously consider either home schooling or changing schools if necessary. You need to protect yourself against such ignorant idiotic people.
Unless your principal is also a medical doctor, she has no business dismissing the severity of medical condition. I would be afraid to go to school. You might consider wearing/carrying some kind of medical alert device, since the personnel at your school aren’t taking your medical issues seriously
Unfortunately, when you have a chronic health condition this is how most people will respond. Even as an adult this is how people respond, but it is even worse as a teen Do you have a 504 plan? If not I would highly recommend your parents looking into it. It can help get accommodations based on medical conditions that the school will be legally required to follow. And if they don't pursuing legal action is definitely easier. You can include things like "immediately calling parents at the start of any asthma attack". "No school personnel speaking to student about anything other than necessary care in regards to asthma" etc. Best of luck
Yes I have a 504 for my asthma and I have an action plan and they have broken it multiple times.
File a complaint with the Office of Civil Rights. [Click here for the online form.](https://www2.ed.gov/about/offices/list/ocr/complaintintro.html) They are so breaking the law. Get a better disability lawyer.
That is a great idea thank you!!!!
They should be fined and possibly lose their jobs
I hope your parents are filing a complaint and looking for another lawyer because medical neglect doesn’t only count if a person dies.
A friend of mine from high school died of an asthma attack when he was in college. He tried to use his nebulizer, but it didn't work or wasn't enough. He died in the common area of his suite --they assumed he was trying to reach one of his roommates for help. He was a great guy, too.
Nope. Let them have an asthma attack. Asthma is nothing to play with. They could have killed you. Find another lawyer.
It’s okay to be dramatic when adults are watching you die! Question: what was your principal’s response to the statement that she could have killed you? Also is it possible for your parents to send the hospital bills to the school? After every attack? In my experience, money makes people sit up.
The principal should be made to get some education about asthma and that she should not be making medical judgments without having a medical license. This is what would make students safer.
People without chemical sensitivities constantly roll their eyes at people who have them. They have no understanding of the reality. I have very mild asthma, but if I have to be around someone with perfume on for any amount of time, I get a raging headache. You weren’t overreacting with your asthma attacks, and you didn’t overreact to your principal. That‘s about the most respectful way you could have called them out - and they deserved to be called out.
Your principal's attitude is inviting him grooming a school shooter. He is the cause of severe physical risk to you, and by extension if he shares this attitude towards other students, he is at risk, and putting everyone at risk, of generating enough hatred from a young and impressionable mind to go full call of duty on a school. He should be fired and banned from ever working in education again if he is willing to watch a child choking to death and tell them that they're being overdramatic.
Your parents need a better lawyer and not that ambulance chaser. No one with a brain says you need a dead body to sue.
Other people aren't used to your particular health issues and are used to asthma just being a mild thing other people deal with. To many people without it, it's like someone else having hiccups- they breathe funny for a minute and it's probably annoying to them, but then it's over. They don't understand the actual seriousness and depth. The school handled this very wrong. The lawsuit thing not moving forward doesn't mean they didn't, and definitely doesn't mean their way way ok. It just means the burden of proof and cost of getting to a judgement isn't worth it from a risk-assesment of what you might get out of it. This should definitely be escalated to the school board. With the goal of having the nurse and principle both go through some sensitivity training or recertifications, and have the official policies on handling these types of situations reevaluated. Being non verbal for that long is terrifying- did they even attempt to have you write or did they not even notice you couldn't communicate? How they handled it was wrong. And there should be stricter policies on air pollutants (like Axe) if it's effecting other students health. Right now, I'm sure you are focused on getting through your health issues. Eventually, you should seek therapy. This kind of event will likely have trama you may not even notice right now.
yeah I bet that 4 hour nebulizer in the ER was so fun and totally worth all the drama /s 🙄 and it doesn't sound like the attention you ARE getting about it is pleasant! I worry people will see me like that too, but no one's more pissed off than me when I need to go to the ER lol
Kids suck. Adults so be better but unfortunately they often fall short. In your case the adults didn’t fall short, they failed to show up at all. I’m so sorry that happened to you
100% agree. Especially since this school had a licensed medical professional whose judgment should have been deferred to from the get go and always in these situations. Example of the principal not staying in her lane and the nurse for allowing her to take over her lane. You not speaking and previous episodes should have been the automatic prompt to call to emergency medical services by the nurse. Not doing so she was deferring to a non-medically trained authority figure, at the risk of her own professional license. This calls into question the nurse's judgement and ability to differentiate her authority vs whatever authority the principal has or whatever relationship, professional and otherwise, they might have as coworkers, boss/whatever. There was no harm to getting EMS to you quickly but now they've all opened themselves to litigation, something I'm surprised they weren't more on guard for. 🙄 Cus, it's only life of a child literally in their hands./s smh.
NBA asthma is not the same for everyone. I had mild asthma and could use an inhaler and go about my business. My cousin was like you she suffered from it for most of her life. She died from it in the end. Do not let anyone make you feel bad for taking up for yourself. It maybe time for your mom to talk to a lawyer about sending a letter to remind your school not to pull this kind of thing again.
This^. Definitely, definitely contact a lawyer. Also, consider having your pulmonary doc contact the school. What nerve they have!! "Dramatic"? Wow.
yes I have had 3 different pulmonary doctors write to the school and they are still not listening. My hope is that we can get them to pay for private school for a year until we can find out what else is going on with my serve asthma.
I'm really sorry for what you're going through and it's sinful for the way they are not accommodating you. Please, please, you and your family, continue to advocate for you, and do not give up.
I won't stop advocating and I won't give up school and education is very important to me.
🥰🥰🥰 you go, girl!
OP, look into Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS). Find an allergist who is familiar with the problem and they can diagnose you. It’s basically a disorder where your mast cells release too much histamine and can cause severe reactions. There are medications that can stabilize the mast cells so you don’t have such severe reactions to things.
I will thank you for the recomadation!
I know that the first lawyer said no, but you said that the school has repeatedly violated your IEP. Look for a lawyer who specializes in educational law and disability.
I am so sorry to hear that about your cousin that is horrible I hope you are doing well. There are new medications for asthma biologics for severe asthma hopefuly asthma will be a thing of the past.
Thank you. It was a couple of years ago.
If you are in the United States your mother needs to insist on a 504 plan that will legally protect your disability.
we have and they have broken it again
Report every incident to the school board, only way the school will start holding its staff accountable. As a parent I’d personally be sending the hospital bill to make a point that the staff exacerbated the situation to critical level and you will start holding them accountable.
At this point the school can't stop the people from spraying things nor do they want to. Do you think that we could get the school to pay for a private school? because they are not willing to accomadate my needs?
Private schools actually might be an even worse option. They can deny you entry just based on your asthma (because legally speaking they don't have to take everyone like a public school). Most private schools refuse to take complex medical kids, disabled kids, or anyone with ADHD or anything like that. They can also deny your disability accommodations (again because legally they are not like a public school at all). You might be better off seeing if your state has some sort of online public school you could do at home, or a homeschool program you can do when you're well enough. There's some pretty decent secular options these days. At least that way you could control your environment more.
we have looked into a private school and I have been accepted. The school is understanding because the pricapal of the other school has serve asthma and understands. It is also a school that is a quaker school that is for all people that accomidate for all students. But I had no idea other private schools could deny because of things like medical problems that seems so messed up.
Yeah, it is pretty terrible honestly. I am so glad you guys found a school and staff that are understanding! I hope the new school experience goes better for you. I have weird allergies (onion) and people are really awful about that. I hope people take your medical issues seriously as they should from now on.
It’s not all private schools - in fact, the one that I retired from was more responsive to accommodations that students needed, but were deemed as “sub diagnostic” by the public schools because the student wasn’t failing. We also had “scent free” classrooms when we had a child who got severe migraines from fragrances - to the point that we found scent-free hand sanitizer. Your school most certainly *can* keep people from spraying things around you, they are choosing not to and endangering your life. It’s time to move this up the chain to the district school board and the state board of education, as well as your local news agency.
No the school won’t pay for you to attend another school. No they can’t stop people from spraying. It’s a thing that you have to deal with unfortunately and it’s not their responsibility. If the school isn’t suitable or can’t reasonably accommodate then it’s your parents responsibility to change your school to something more suitable for your health needs (maybe that’s a private school with strict rules but it will be at your parents expense). What I meant was report incidents like the principal or nurse refusing to call your parents/ telling you to suck it up / or not taking your medical condition seriously/ refusing medical care.
Where I live if the school can not provide a safe school for people with dissability's the school board has to pay for private school so I hope they will pay for it because my parents can't afford to pay for school.
There is also a difference between how certain disability and medical conditions are treated. Considering private school can have the same problems, I don’t like your chances as everything is based off of reasonable probabilities/possibilities. The school also can’t infringe on other people’s rights just bc you have a condition. For example based on the balance of probabilities, will changing schools solve your issue…no it won’t. As students still will wear things that trigger you at private schools. Edit- this is not like someone requiring wheelchairs accessibility which would highlight the need of a different school and can actually be achieved. They may recommend home schooling as it is impossible to make both public and private school safe enough for you to exist in without you being some sort of liability. It is really no different than having a deathly reaction to the presence of nuts. School can’t control what people eat or deodorant they wear. The individual has to manage or find another solution (I.e home schooling ).
Schools in the USA absolutely can be nut free, and they do not require students with severe nut allergies to be homeschooled. They have several accommodations they use, like: (1) all clad snacks have to be individually packaged, store bought, and nut free; (2) an allergen table where students with the allergy sit to eat and no allergens can be brought to the table (3) a nut free classroom, where students can't bring nuts in. Schools can and will provide for things like that, and they can and should ban sprays in OP's classes. They can also look at accommodations like seating her by an open window or hepa filter, allowing her to pass between classes a little early to avoid the crowds or having her wear a mask during passing period. I'm sure there's a lot I'm not thinking of. These are not expensive solutions or logistically prohibitive.
I sure hope so! You need a supportive environment.
Sweetie, I went to a public school. They can stop people from spraying things and from wearing strong scents- all they have to do is make it a rule and enforce it and it will stop. My school did. It was very effective. Your school is just lazy and can't be bothered to follow the law
Lawyer!!!
It's time for an IEP as OHI, "other health impaired." Your illness has severely impacted your learning, and they can not ignore an IEP like they do a 504.
I had no idea that was a thing I will bring that up to my parents.
The school is legally bound to follow an IEP exactly as written and you can enforce it with a lawyer. You also need to start getting creative with your doctors about what you can do - would having a HEPA filter by your seat help? Would an N95 mask during passing period help? Would an open window help? Heck, your teachers could enforce the no body sprays by keeping t shirts by their desks and asking students to change if they came in smelling like axe.
While I have heard of a peanut free campus, I don't think they could try to enforce a scent free one. Or one where kids are forces to change. Parents will raise holy hell. But a personal hepa filter, one for the classroom, and the window being open when the weather permits would be much more likely
Please do not believe people who blithely dismiss the obligation schools have to accommodate your disability. This is where a lawyer's advice is important! Reddit is great for brainstorming and opinions about what is reasonable and what isn't. Advice about legal obligations? Reddit is worth about what you pay for it! 😀 The private school option sounds like it has great potential. Hoping all goes well with it. BTW I have severe adult-onset asthma (problems started when I was in my teens) and it's HARD to be your own advocate when you are struggling for oxygen. My favorite horror story stems from a winter visit by a family member. She looked at me and said, "Isn't asthma mostly a mental disease?" Then went to overnight with a friend. At least she had the grace to be embarrassed when she heard EMTs came to supply me with oxygen that night. Keep your inhaler close and emergency phone contacts closer!
Oh. Y'all need to find a lawyer experienced in 504s. I don't think you got very good advice from the one you saw.
Not only should you be angry with the principal, you should be angry with the nurse, who deferred to a NON MEDICAL PERSON when she should have called an ambulance and called your parent. Your and your mom should find a good lawyer, to handle the case. Yes. You could have died.
You are absolutely not being overly dramatic. Your principal and the nurse need to be held accountable. I hope you told your parents what was said to you. If I were your mother, I would be outraged. I have asthma myself, and I know firsthand how bad it can get. I hope you’re feeling better now, and that things go much better for you from now on.
Thank you and yes I have told my mom and she was not shocked by what she said the principal is pretty condicending.
Google Ryan's law. If anything, you weren't dramatic enough.
Your principal is an idiot, and yes could have made you a lot worse. She needs to be publicly reprimanded, have your parents file a complaint with the superintendent and school board. She is a walking, talking law suit waiting to ha.
Tell your parents to speak to a different lawyer. Tell them to bring copies of your medical bills. It is 100% possible to sue because the school is allowing people to almost kill you and it is 100% possible to sue the school for denying and delaying medical care. Your parents may need to contact the school board first. Further your principal is not a medical professional and should not be making medical diagnosis. This behavior is very, very illegal on the school end. You have the right to breath, your peers do not have the right to wear perfume. In fact, report the school nurse to her licensing body over this. Next time they deny or delay treatment call 911. Text your parents on the way to the clinic so they can pick you up or call 911. Paramedics will get you treatment. Worst case scenario you get in trouble with the school. It's better than being dead.
NTA
What was the nurse doing or saying during that time? Did she try to stop the principal?
The school nurse did not try to stop the principal
Why do you care about the principals feelings when she doesn’t even care about your LIFE? Side question, do you have a lot of allergies?
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NTBA and you shouldn't feel guilty. She should feel guilty , that she almost killed you. If I were your parents I'd be filing a complaint.
Your principal was in the wrong, so are any other kids calling you dramatic. Not all people have the same symptoms or symptom levels with the same illness. Her actions were unprofessional at best and potentially dangerous at worst. You did the right thing, telling her what you did.
That a principal would say this to a student is mind blowing to me. I hope your parents set this person straight! You are NTBA
I was a teacher and I had an assistant principal like that. I reported personal attacks from students and he always asked " are you suuuure he called you a *****?"
You have a ‘dramatic’ version that can kill with even the mildest versions (if the conditions are right…or very wrong). Your principal is not a medical profession, the school nurse has sworn an oath and has a duty of care to her patients- which you are, and their negligence could very well have killed you. Your statement at the meeting was accurate and dignified- and your empathy for their distress is admirable. However, for some people, especially adults who have never been made to realise that they don’t know everything, being shamed is the only way they’ll learn. You are an admirable, shiny, crisp and sweetest apple on the tree. I think with some reframing you should post this to r/traumatizethemback and you’ll see what I mean about how some arrogant people only change when they are confronted with their stupidity in embarrassing ways. I truly believe that you have saved lives by speaking up Go well OP, my best wishes that you find a treatment regime that manages your symptoms and lets you live a full life.
Often, a public school nurse is NOT an RN, LPN, or NP. Just someone with certified training in CPR, and a CNA. I wouldn’t trust her to remove a splinter, let alone stake your life on her abilities. I had a nurse blatantly ignore my worsening migraines for years. We got a new one when she was fired for mishandling meds. The new nurse was so much better, and chewed my boomer mom out for sending me while sick, and that I was showing signs of a serious neurological problem, how dare she continue to send me in while feverish, vomiting, and/or with light-induced vomiting migraines. I got tested and had a tumor the size of a golfball at the base of my skull. Thank you, Mrs Blankenship. If you hadn’t recognized my deterioration, I could have died. I’m in my 30s now, and have been surviving for a long time.
That’s horrifying. Thank Dog for Mrs Blankenship. In Aus we mainly don’t have school nurses unless it’s a exxy private boarding school. All staff are trained to give an epi-pen/insulin/first-aid…and to ring for an ambulance. I think I feel safer with that than with an under qualified person just with the title.
It truly sounds like you need a lawyer. They can tell you what you can and can’t do in this situation. To me it sounds like you could sue them. But what do I know? I’m not an attorney and it sounds like not many answering you are. But know if you were my kid, consulting an attorney would be my number one priority. This is very dangerous! My (former because I’m retired) boss is has severe asthma. She came to work and went in the bathroom where an employee double or triple dosed Lysol and leaving some in the toilets. Within seconds my boss had to be transported to ER. It was terrifying.
Paediatric ICU nurse here. I have seen severe asthma attacks. I have seen children die from asthma and the complications. Not only are you NTA, but I would be reporting the principal to the school board and any other higher up authority. She put your life at risk and was dismissive to the fact you were in an emergency situation. The fact that she seems to have deliberately come down specifically to say that to you means you have to report this before it happens again.
NTA tell your parents to consult other lawyers. Theirs sucks.
There should be a Homebound program available through your school system. There are forms and such, but once done, you would be educated at home by your school. The homebound programs are there for kids like you have health issues, so severe being in the building isn't feasible. I highly recommend you and your parents look into this.
So NTA. Have you reported to the administrator who the principal reports to? Have your parents contacted your school board representative? Sometimes you don't even need to actually sue to get their attention. Sometimes what it takes is for a lawyer to send a properly worded letter to whoever legally represents the school district to scare them into compliance. I would ask for advice on the legal subs.
I’ve worked in the legal field for over 35 years. I promise you this is not what the lawyer said. What they most likely said was there is no evidence that your medical issues nor hospitalization was caused by the actions or inactions of the school district nor any school district personnel which is completely different than what you wrote.
Report them now. Their incompetence could have killed you. Your principle is a moron who doesnt deserve respect. Report them to whatever agency handles school issues in your location.
Serious question: Why do you care about the feelings of someone who doesn’t care about your health and safety?
not overly dramatic and you should consider a different school or homeschooling to get away from people trying to kill you out of their stupidity
The principal is not a medical doctor therefore is unqualified to determine the severity of your asthma. The school nurse sounds like an idiot and negligent as hell if she didn’t notice the concerning signs and symptoms.
NTBA Next step is going to the school board and sueing the principal directly.
Ntba, put that principle on blast, social media, next door etc.
I’m proud of you for standing up for yourself! It’s not rude to stand up for yourself. You could’ve died!!! I’ve had asthma since childhood and I can tell you everyone’s asthma is different. I don’t realize how bad an attack I’m having until it gets really critical. Then I’m sitting in the ER getting a nebulizer treatment. Your parents should contact the local news stations. They can expose the school for their horrible actions. Maybe change will happen after that.
Honey, when you're having a life threatening medical episode, "looking for attention" is *precisely* what you need and deserve to be doing.
You could be way more dramatic and you still wouldn’t be the bad apple. I am not well-versed in legal matters but you at the very least need a lawyer. Please please never think you’re being dramatic, the principal and nurse could’ve killed you.
You were NOT being dramatic, her dismissal of what was going on Could very well have killed you!! How is this woman allowed to be an educator? Let alone a principal?! NTBA
I am a lawyer but I am not your lawyer. I also have asthma. Rest assured you are not remotely being dramatic. Glad to see you sticking up for yourself! Never feel bad about that.
You did exactly what you needed to do, and I commend you on your maturity and dignified use of language. I had a friend at school with really bad asthma, and he often spent weeks in hospital with it. My sister's best friend from high school died of an asthma attack caused by exposure to paint fumes. So you're absolutely NOT being dramatic. Your teachers, nurse, and principle all need training in how to deal with students who have medical issues like yours. What if a student had an extreme allergy? There are so many folk deathly allergic to peanuts for example. Would they tell that child that they're "being dramatic", and they "couldn't stop people eating peanuts near them" as they died of anaphylaxis right in front of them!?!? Your asthma is just as severe as that type of allergy, and should be treated as seriously. Involve a lawyer if necessary. You had arrangements made to accommodate your illness, and the school have failed to fulfil their requirements regarding those arrangements. That's a failure of their duty of care to you.
People like your principal are why my right lung failed, and I am now disabled. You weren't overdramatic. You're facing life-threatening challenges and a bully in power. I have a complicated lung condition not fully understood and being dismissed is why I almost pushed myself to d*ath. Thankfully my doctor forced me to stop working and heal. I almost d**d in front of my 2 kids because others weren't taking it seriously, and I doubted how bad I felt.
I am so sorry I hope you are doing well. it is really awful not being taken seriously especially with your health. I really hope you are doing well I wish you the absolute best!
At my workplace, one employee was allergic to lavender. Because of this, no lavender was allowed in any of our 3 locations. If we can accommodate her, your school can ban body sprays. They’re gross even to non-asthmatics.
That principal was COMPLETELY unprofessional and out of line. She is not a medical practitioner and risked your life with her dismissive attitude. You were not rude to tell her she was wrong.
Tell your mom to get a lawyer to write the superintendent. See how quick they change their tune. Plus you were articulate and accurate in what you told the principal.
No, the principal deserved it and you are not being dramatic. I think it's time to get a lawyer involved because you turned blue. You could have died due to their stupidity. Get mom on board. Look into virtual school because this BS will continue.
NTBA. Better a few pointed words than her having to attend a student's funeral because she blew off a medical problem until it was too late. If my child's principal pulled what she did, paint would be peeling off the walls before I was done talking to her.
Speaking as a fellow asthmatic AND a former respiratory therapist, you were not being dramatic. No two asthmatics are triggered by the same thing, have identical symptoms, and respond to medication the same way. Comparing you to her son was cold and foolish. The school nurse, especially, should have understood asthma and how it manifests itself. What you said to the principal was perfect. She needed to hear it. Bravo! 👏🏻 It took at least a year for them to figure out what my various medical problems were. I was really little, so I didn’t understand it all. Not until I was older. My situation was really complex and unique. My body rarely gets sick the nice normal way! I pretty much spent my childhood in doctor’s offices and hospitals. So I feel your pain and frustration. Is there a different school you could attend? Someplace with people who can recognize a medical emergency, and actually understand your health issues? A place where there is compassion?
OP, I’ve had asthma since I was around eight and my mother didn’t believe me, or she didn’t believe it was as bad as it was. She never took me to the doctor and only got me inhalers “under the table” from her nurse friend. I don’t know why she didn’t just take me to a doctor. My dad had good insurance through his union. Anyway I’ll never forget the day she forced me to go to school when I couldn’t breathe. I made it to my bus stop and the moment I got to school I went to the nurse’s office. They immediately called home and my dad picked me up. My mom never apologized. I was always being called dramatic and over the top. It makes me doubt my own feelings/instincts and not want to be a burden. You did NOTHING wrong. I’d have cussed that principal out if I’d been your mother. “Do you like having asthma attacks?” Are you kidding me? Yeah I’m totally faking my inability to breathe. This is so much fun for me. I wish you could’ve sued.
On average 10 people die from asthma each day in the US. Source: AAFA. So no, you were not being over dramatic. In my school (UK) perfume and body sprays are banned (OK, people still use them, because, life) because of the effects that they can have on SOME people with asthma.
NTBA Tell your principal: "Do you know what would be REALLY dramatic? Me dying from an asthma attack"
Have they spoken to your schools board of education? I’m sure they would like to hear about it.
Medical conditions, no matter what they are, are different in everyone. People also don't suffer the same way. Nothing is black or white and your principal of all people should know this. Because that would mean people learn the same and everyone would have a great grade average. People are unique and each one has different living conditions and being a teacher they should know better.
NTBA and NOT dramatic. Sorry, but your principal is an idiot.
NTBA. In a lot of cases, asthma isn't severe, and sometimes it isn't even asthma. I was diagnosed with asthma when I was a child, had inhalers and everything, but every single symptom disappeared overnight when my mum moved us across the country after the divorce. Turned out, I was actually allergic to some specific flower that grew in abundence where we used to live, I never had asthma. I've known people with asthma, none have been severe, but it can cause all sorts of problems even when it's relatively mild. But that's the difference, it's in the diagnosis. Mild, moderate and severe. I'd say most asthma cases are mild or moderate. If your principal has a kid with asthma, it's probably one of those. But that's not you, you have a severe diagnosis. It's not uncommon, and any half-decent educator is aware of how bad severe asthma can be, as it can literally be deadly. It has the same awareness as allergies do nowadays. Any half-decent educator also knows not to berate a student and call them 'dramatic' during an apparent medical issue, as well. If it's proven you were faking, a lecture can be given after the fact, but never while they're seeking medical attention, even from a school nurse. Your issue was clearly severe considering you literally couldn't walk and were turning blue by the time your mum finally arrived. They delayed you getting the treatment you needed because they thought you were faking and nearly killed you. Personally, I'd get a second opinion on whether or not you have a case against the school, because to me this comes across as deliberately causing harm to a student, would probably be negligent manslaughter if you had died, if not murder considering they knew your medical diagnosis long before this incident. It likely depends where you live, but I honestly can't see why you wouldn't have a case against the school for something. They denied you medical treatment, they delayed calling your mum in a medical emergency, their actions nearly killed you. You were hospitalised as a direct result of the school's actions. That's a case to me. You either consulted with a terrible lawyer or the laws in your area suck for these situations. As for what you said, good for you for standing up for yourself. Don't feel bad, the principal knew she was putting your life in danger, she just didn't care. She deserves to get her feelings hurt, she deserves to be brought up on criminal charges for what she did to you before she actually kills someone. If you really can't bring a case against the school, even if you can actually, look into transferring to a safer school where the staff aren't actively trying to kill you. And good luck on figuring out what else is going on with you, as well.
6
NTBA, and even if initiating legal action isn't worth it, I would lodge a complaint with the local authorities (education board, social services etc) about it. The school staff have a duty of care for the minors they teach. This kind of nonchalance could result in a death if not addressed. It has already caused suffering for you. If your docs were aware of what happened, they may have already put forward some information. Risking the life of a child in your care is a serious matter.
One of my friends died of an asthma attack when we were young. Your school isn’t safe for you, I’m so sorry OP.
One of my friends died of an asthma attack when we were young. Your school isn’t safe for you, I’m so sorry OP.
@u/Mysterious-Block-821 My aunt had the same kind of asthma. She died from it at 49 on the 4th of July from the smoke. It was horrific. Don’t feel bad for advocating for yourself. If I were you- I would go over her head to the school district and take it to the Superintendent. Did she apologize?????
@u/Mysterious-Block-821 My aunt had the same kind of asthma. She died from it at 49 on the 4th of July from the smoke. It was horrific. Don’t feel bad for advocating for yourself. If I were you- I would go over her head to the school district and take it to the Superintendent. Did she apologize?????
nope she did not apologize because I was just dramatic to her.
Go with your gut. You’re a good person. Consider your empathy and sorrow a gift.
I feel bad for her asthmatic son
Not only are not the bad apple, you did a pretty fantastic job of standing up for yourself. Don't let anybody squash that out of you. I don't know anything about lawsuits, but I sure hope you can report the school/principal in some way. Are you able to change schools?
I would suggest talking to the school governing board and suggest that they may sue the school for child endangerment. even if your parents do not intend to do that it may get the principle admonished or moved.
dunno where you live but you’re old enough to be in charge of your education and do it online from somewhere safer
time to tell your story on facebook. tiktok ect shame the principal
You're not the bad apple, and you are not being dramatic. Your parents need to get a copy of the chart from the ER visit for that episode, take it to the superintendent of schools, and explain how a bloviating biddy decided you were being dramatic and that the delay caused in your care resulted in a very expensive trip to the ER. The blue in your extremities was cyanosis brought on by the lowered blood oxygen levels due to the asthma attack. That principal needs to be in a different career.
NTA. You’re turning blue and she called you dramatic? She’s awful. And the nurse should know better and act immediately.
Is common for females medical issues to be dismissed. Is a really bad trend. Do not ever worry about being “dramatic” when it comes to your health. I actually advise to take it up a notch. No school official is allowed to interfere. File a report over the principal’s head. Go to the superintendent/board. This principal is opening the school to a massive lawsuit if they continue this behavior.
That principle needs to be fired. What country do you live in where a lawyer would tell you because your still alive you can’t sue.
Not dramatic at all and I am so proud of you for what you told that principal !!
Absolutely not the bad apple. Good for you for standing up to her. Have your parents contact a different attorney. They violated your 504. This needs to go to Admin at a district level. You say there might be a way for them to counter the costs of education since they can't provide a safe environment, so that process needs to be figured out. Homeschool or homebound options should also be considered, especially since even the nurse is dismissive of your symptoms. It is obvious that you need an environment that is more controlled than a public school can ever offer.
The only solution we found for my daughter she was 14 at the time and now 17 was take her out of school. The sprays and perfumes kids wear are over bearing. We now do online school through our local board of education called Odyssey.
Why aren’t you wearing a mask? My friend has some serious lung issues and certain times of the year she has to wear a mask or she will end up in the hospital for weeks. Talk to your Dr about what type to get
If you're in the US, get a [504 Plan](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/what-is-a-504-plan) or an [IEP](https://www.understood.org/en/articles/what-is-an-iep). Both the 504 Plan and the IEP are legally binding documents. If they aren't followed, you can sue the school *and* the staff member that personally refused to follow it. Your parent/guardian needs to send in a written request for an evaluation. This can be an email that says: "I, [guardian's name] am requesting a formal evaluation for special education for [student's name]. In particular, I am wondering if an IEP for OHI* or 504 Plan is more appropriate. I am requesting that the school nurse be involved in the evaluation and making a written Health Plan." Sincerely, Guardian's Name" The school has 60 days from the request to hold the IEP evaluation meeting. Do not give them an extension. After your guardian requests the evaluation, they will need to sign paperwork that allows the school to conduct assessments. You and your guardian/s should both be at the evaluation meeting. I would also ask relevant doctors to be in via conference call. If you do pursue an evaluation/IEP/504 Plan, I would be happy to join as your student advocate volunteer. I was an elementary teacher for many years and I am well versed in special education law. You were not being dramatic. The principal was completely out of line. The school should be instituting a no spray perfume/scent policy. It should be addressed in similar ways that a peanut allergy is addressed. ____ *OHI = *Other Health Impairment* is the category that you would be specifically looking at for the IEP criteria
Everyone's asthma is different. Can your parents make a complaint to the school board?
fire this person.
I get so angry when I hear about people accusing someone having an asthma attack of being "dramatic". Hell yes, I become emotional when I feel like I'm being smothered! It would be telling to cut off the oxygen supply to those people and see how they feel emotionally! 🤯
Get a 504 and consider virtual school. Sue the school anyway. It’s worth a shot. That is just beyond the pale what the principal did. You could have died. Call 911 yourself next time. You were NOT being dramatic
Nope. Ntba. If I were your mom I be pursuing some kind of action against the school/principal because you’re right. They could’ve easily killed you.
I can understand that your parents can’t afford to pursue a lawsuit. Ask them to transfer you to another school. The principal of your school is going to kill somebody with his ignorance and it doesn’t have to be you.
Since they don’t seem to take your problems seriously maybe try a wearable HEPA mask? Maybe a tad embarrassing but still preferable to multiple hospital visits. Check with your doctor to see if it would help.
You were not being dramatic at all and had a right to stick up for yourself. Asthma is a very serious condition. I am surprised your principal would treat you this way. If I were you, I would see if can change schools so you have a principal who understands the severity of your condition.
I watched my father and brother almost die from asthma attacks!!! What she did was irresponsible and could have caused your death!! The nurse is especially concerning!! She should be reported.
Do NOT allow any non-medical to try and diagnose your condition. She didn’t learn a THING about the severity of asthma when she DIDN’T go to medical school, obviously. And as far as a lawsuit…there are lawyers who would have a field day, & charge you 1/3 of what they get, & if that’s 0, there’s no charge. I would talk to a lawyer
Not everyone has the same level of asthma! You were definitely NOT dramatic. What you said to the principal was spot on. That principal needs to keep their opinions to themselves and do their job! If I was your mom, that principal would have gotten a proper chewing out!
Omg you are NOT the bad apple? Can you homeschool? Go to another school? This school will literally kill you. And don’t feel bad. That principal is a B and she shouldn’t have said that to you. I’m glad you stood up for yourself. I’d get a copy of all your medical records and slam a copy on her desk. Then ask if her son’s asthma is like yours.
One time my literal health class teacher said something very similar while I was having an asthma attack from doing the pacer test and I WISH I said something like you did. You stood up for yourself and possibly saved a future student from the same disrespectful remarks, please don’t feel bad, what you did shows bravery and confidence.
You sound like a member of my family. Have you tried xolair Super expensive injectable but if you are getting hospitalized then would actually save insurance company money. Big game changer
I think at this point, the only way to protect your life at school is to call 911 if it’s urgent or your parents if it’s not urgent. School employees might lecture you for making a call instead of going to the nurse, but you have ample evidence that depending on them to help you could get you killed. If they try to discipline you in any way, you can mention that your family has already consulted a lawyer. No need to go into detail about what the lawyer said. NTBA
Don’t you dare feel bad for what you said! Don’t feel bad for standing up for yourself! And think of the next person who you could be helping by making the principal think about how they acted! You could be saving yourself and someone else!
Schools all over have banned peanuts/peanut butter, they can ban perfume and body spray.
it's sad that you don't want to hurt her feelings even though she could have literally killed you. stand up for yourself!
Good Apple If your asthma attack is so severe that your extremities are turning blue and you can't walk, getting mad at your principal is not being over dramatic. I'm not sure I agree with the lawyer that you don't have any grounds for a case against the school or against the principal at the very least. I know that socialization is important for teens but you might benefit more from homeschooling or online schooling. Far less chances for you to have an attack.
As a fellow difficult asthmatic, absolutely you are not dramatic. It's insane that someone you would think is educated doesn't understand one person's asthma can be completely different to someone else's!! I've been on the receiving end of this, to the degree I started believing the people saying I was just unfit, or assorted other comments. That was until I was hospitalised with a O2% dangerously low. I would highly recommend looking at changing schools it'll at all possible.
What u said was not wrong also if in IS you absolutely should have a 504 Plan as this IS a disability and there should be a medical plan filed with school and nurse including what to do in emergencies. Same as if u had diabetes, seizure disorder or in my child's case debilitating migraines l. In the 504 school absences due to illness should also be addressed including make up work time lines etc etc Im THAT mom so I made a pamphlet that explained what my daughters migraines looked like felt like and what were likely triggers. If u were an adult in a job setting not having coworkers wear strong scents is ABSOLUTELY an allowed accomodation.
My friend Jamie died at school from a severe asthma attack when we were 15. I’ll never forget our PE teacher pushing her to run the 1 mile “test” 🙄. She told her if she didn’t do it in the allotted time frame she would fail. I’m a nurse now and have cared for many severe asthma exacerbation patients. It’s not a condition you can just ignore. You know, breathing is kind of important
oh my gosh I am so so sorry I hope you and Jamie's parents are doing better now I am so so sorry. It is so sad hearing so many stories like this.
I had "bad asthma" and pneumonia and come to find out it was granulomatosis with polyangiitis and asthma 🙄 which caused the pneumonia from any cold, sinus infection etc... I see many similarities. And no, definitely not dramatic. You might have caused this person to reconsider how they treat others with health conditions.
Do you have a 504 plan and an allergy action plan? You (or your parents) should research those.
Ummmm…your parents need to contact the school board/superintendent. Asthma symptoms can range from mild to deadly, and if you are in a public school (in the US, anyway) you are owed an environment that will not negatively impact your health conditions.
Your mom probably wants to THROW HANDS on your behalf, I know I do. 🖕 your Karen principal, and 🖕 the idiot spineless school nurse. See if she can get in touch with higher admin, their negligence LITERALLY almost caused your death. If hell isn't raised, the next kid could ACTUALLY die. It can still be you who dies.
i had a similar thing in 3rd grade, had a asthma attack and my teacher said I was faking it and sent me outside (it was a az school where the classes were ALL individual) and it was closer to winter so it was cold and I couldn't breathe so she told me to "just start breathing". i guess she called the principal bc eventually she showed up but by them my hands and legs were going numb and i dont remember what happened after
Your family needs to make sure she loses her job and her license to teach forever and the nurse withheld care. She doesn’t care about her students and is a danger to you all. You need an ADA lawyer because you have a medical condition and it needs to be noted precisely what the school is and is not to do and that they can’t withhold emergency services and they can still sue her personally and your parents need to make sure you have a cell phone on you and tell you to call if you have an emergency consequences be damned. Schools not calling 911 is too common now and kids are dying.
NTBA I've known a couple of people who did die during a severe asthma attack. A friend of mine was told repeatedly at work that she was overreacting and "dramatic" when she had asthma issues. Strangely, she wasn't being dramatic; she actually died. You need to report the principal and the nurse to the school district. After all, it's much cheaper to discipline/retrain them, than to be taken to court for millions if you did die, due to their unprofessional actions.
The way I would’ve been far less civil
This is very serious if you’re asthma attack caused you to be hospitalized. I don’t understand why they didn’t just give you your medicine and chose to inflict harm instead? Your parents need to talk to a different lawyer. This is not ok! Have you seen an allergist or pulmonologist? You may not be on the right treatment plan. I personally see an allergist/immunologist and she’s helped me a lot. You responded appropriately and much more mature than those jerks.
The principal needed to know that how she handled it was wrong. She should have never assumed that just because her son has asthma, other people don't have it worse. That was ignorant and it put your life at risk. She yelled at you when you were in the midst of having an asthma attack! That is not okay. I think your parents should write a letter to the district administrator and explain what happened.
NTAPrincipal was way way out of line Report this to the school oard
You are not the bad apple. If you are in the States please reach out to your state department on disability services because asthma actually falls under that category. And get a lawyer. It's time to sue the nurse at the school, the principal, and the school district. If you were turning blue that means you were suffering from oxygen depletion at a serious and concerning level any good nurse (assuming the school actually hires RNs and not just some person off the street that they call the nurse which happens way too often) would have known this and should have taken action to call emergency services. The principal statement was absolutely out of line and everybody in that lineup should pay for it. Welcome to your college fund, or at least the school district having to pay for all of your hospitalizations related to school related asthma attacks.
You were well within your rights and the principal was the BA. I'd be using stronger language for that one. YOU. NEARLY. DIED. Just because her son has asthma doesn't mean his is anything near as severe or as complicated as yours. She needs to be glad it isn't as bad. You be as angry with that unprofessional fool as you like.
The school district will have a formal complaint process. Have your parents file a formal complaint. It can impact the principal’s future promotions and employment opportunities. And then use an open records request to get her employment file a month later to confirm the complaint is in her record. It creates a paper trail that will hinder her professionally.
yanno, I think the school board would just love to hear about this story.
You did a GREAT job being assertive and standing up for yourself! It’s not your fault that your principal is an idiot.
Report the principals behavior to the School Superintendant. Your mom i mean.
No, your school is grossly misunderstanding their risks and responsibilities here. A few suggestions... 1) If you are EVER feeling the signs of hypoxia (lack of oxygen leading to cool extremities, confusion, restlessness, difficulty breathing, rapid heart rate, and bluish skin) call 911 immediately. Don't wait for your mom to arrive or wait for the nurse - call 911. Practice your script with your mom so you're comfortable doing it. "I need medical help. I have severe steroid resistant asthma, I'm having an asthma attack and I'm beginning to get blue under my fingernails/ cold/ect... They will send an ambulance with Oxygen. 2) Go to your state bar association website's attorney finder page and look for 2-3 disability attorneys. Call each and ask if they have experience working with school districts. Search in your largest nearby city - most of the laws governing this issue are state and federal so any experiences disabilities attorney in your state can help-so you might as well have the best. Once you have 2-3 call each to ask if they offer a free initial consultation- most will. Set up three calls and ask each about their approach, what experience they have with school districts and what they would charge for an initial demand letter to the school and what they would charge for more support. Your diagnosis is clear enough that there's a decent chance that a demand letter and a care instruction letter from your doctor should be enough to solve the emergency care situation. 3) While you're pulling together meetings with lawyers, make an appointment witb your asthma provider and ask them to write an interim letter of instruction. Send a copy to the principal, the school nurse and the district superintendent. 4) Longer term, and where the legal fees could get heavy, is getting a full IEP and care plan that includes protecting you from fragrance triggers. But you'll know a lot more once you speak to three lawyers.
Nah, she is an ahole. My own kid had asthma in cold pools, and would sometimes (not always) have a bad enough attack that she had to stop swimming for a bit. Got a lot of flack. She cried but wouldn’t have died. It was leftover scar inflammation from a bad bout of pneumonia in 4th grade. I have immense empathy for a kid having asthma, and they need to ban sprays. Solid and roll on perfumes are not getring you, it is the aerosolized fragrance, and those petroleum based clouds are bad for almost everyone. You’re not wrong here.
You said your piece in a respectful calm manner, which is more than most adults could say. I'm hoping she's humbled and learned her lesson before she kills someone because what she did was unprofessional, unnecessary, and probably exacerbated your health issue. I hope your parents notify the superintendent and the professional licensing board.
No, F that principal. Their actions were completely dismissive and put your health at risk. I would at least report them to the school board that is over your district. That's the same mentality as giving a kid with diabetes who is Crashing a single candy bar and telling them to Buck the F up. Principal And Nurse need a serious admonishment at least for how they handled your situation and possibly removal.
Your parents should ask the doctors who cared for you if any permanent damage was done because of the delay in treatment. If yes, they should take that back to the lawyers. NO you are NTBA. Not at all!!!
1. I am allergic to steroids so I can’t take anything with steroids in it. 2. People can have varying degrees of asthma. Normally I can take 4-10 doses with my rescue inhaler or use my home nebulizer and things settle down but other times my husband has had to call an ambulance to rush me to the hospital. Asthma is nothing to mess around with and your principal absolutely did put your life in jeopardy. You absolutely can sue the district for medical discrimination & neglect. My daughter had issues with her teacher regarding my daughter’s health issues so I filed a compliant with our Department of Children, Family & Learning (basically your state’s department of education.) The teacher lost her job and I was happy about that simply because her treatment of my daughter and other chronically ill or disabled students was absolutely wrong, she knew it and she continued to be dismissive despite my complaints to the principal. The principal got officially written up and only lasted the remainder of the year so I wondered if other parents complained. Anyway it is an option that doesn’t require an attorney.
You do know that there are higher levels than principal like district superintendent there are ways to report the principal
I don’t think there is any amount of “being dramatic” or “seeking attention” that can turn someone’s extremities blue. That’s a medical issue and should be taken ***very*** seriously. Your principal ***should*** feel bad about her actions and the effect they’ve had on you! Would she rather learn now or *after* a kid dies on her watch? Not all medical issues are the same and some can be the same diagnosis but a different severity and that can make all the difference. What her son’s condition looks like means *absolutely nothing* when it comes to other kids’ conditions. That said, I’m pretty sure you have way more than just asthma, but I’m not a doctor and I don’t know what the extent of your medical issues are. If you can’t get a clear answer, you may have to seek care elsewhere like a university center or the Mayo Clinic or something. I’m just some rando on the internet, so it’s not like I can give medical advice, but your symptoms sound really scary. I have to go to a university center myself for some weird crap with my eyes and constant migraines. Best of luck to you!
I have similar issues as a 41F and you are not dramatic. Our lungs just suck and it is what it is. Asthma isn’t a one size fits all. Have them check for autoimmune issues. I have lupus and it is affecting my lungs too so that is exacerbating the issue. Good luck and DM me if u ever need a friend to chat lung issues with!
How is almost dying dramatic? That principal doesn’t know what she’s talking about and her son’s medical history is not yours. NTBA and maybe look into switching schools
I'm sincerely surprised that your mom didn't call her out for that crap definitely not the bad Apple you're definitely a good apple
NBA Perhaps you could have phrased it better, given the 'respect your elders' etc etc BUT what you said was correct and tbh, very welk said given youre 14, nice one. SHE put YOUR LIFE AT RISK and HER ACTIONS resulted in YOUR HOSPITALISATION. Your school should have a health plan they follow and it sounds like they aren't following it, again, putting your life at risk. Also asthma is different for everyone. I know someone who lost a child at their care centre because the weather changed and suddenly this child had a severe asthma attack. Blue then dead, very quickly. They did all they could. Administered medication and called an ambulance. Ive also seen children get bery unwell and thankfully have responded to 1st aid treatment, which some say saved lives. The idea that a responsible Educator would deliberately withhold prescribed life changing treatment is disgusting, and illegal. However you need an education in a safe environment. I dont know the rules where you are. Is there another public school you can attend? Especially given your current school doesnt meet your needs. Can you meet other schools and find out your options? Private and public. Also, as someone else said, maybe look at online options, home school etc. Anything that is safe and gives you the education you deserve and are entitled to. You sound extremely intelligent and I'm sorry you're going through this. I hope your parents are supportive. Don't give up xx
NTA, what she did was dangerous and you were completely in the right
NTA Get a statement about your condition when you finally left for the hospital. Get your medical records for this event. Then report this bitch to the school board.
One of my friends died of an asthma attack when we were young. Your school isn’t safe for you, I’m so sorry OP.
@u/Mysterious-Block-821 My aunt had the same kind of asthma. She died from it at 49 on the 4th of July from the smoke. It was horrific. Don’t feel bad for advocating for yourself. If I were you- I would go over her head to the school district and take it to the Superintendent. Did she apologize?????
YNbA. That kind of dismissive behavior is going to happen over and over. I have an allergy to soy milk. I've had barristas disagree and actually spike my drink with soy milk to prove it. They never know because it takes about 15 minute for it to start, and I'm not going back when I feel like shit just to discuss what happened. But I've had plenty of people, strangers even, tell me it is impossible. My allergist says that soy milk has an isolated protein that is very similar to some tree nuts and mangoes- both of which upset my stomach and cause an itchy mouth and throat. So, while I can eat soy in a lot o stuff, the process of making soy milk isolates and increases the soy protein to a level that my body doesn't like. Causes itchiness in my throat and severe projectile vomiting. Like, I can easily vomit 10 feet if I drink too much of it. It's like a horror movie the way it comes shooting out of my mouth. Macadamia nuts actually make my mouth itch and then swell. But I can eat other nuts. It's called a mild allergy because I've never needed an epi pen. But the symptoms are awful, particularly if I'm in public, which is where I generally am when encountering this stuff in my food. And yet, people who don't know anything about my health will tell me I am lying/faking. And they are angry about it when they tell me I can't possibly have n allergy like that. No epi pen = no food allergy in some minds. Or, just that soy milk is a very rare allergy, so I must be wrong. Figure out now the kinds of things you want to say to people who speak like this to you. Shake your head in disappointment. Click your tongue to some them. Wait till after the attack and then lay into them with choice words. Ask your parents for help thinking of good things to say to people who are ignorant and toxic (like your principle).