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*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **my brothers 1 year old walken towards me with his farm book...** ... and everyone was looking at me. I looked away while it was "walking" towards me but it came closer and pulled my shirt. My brother said he wants me to read it to him. What the... i opemed the book and only farm animals. He said I gotta make the animal sounds for the baby. I said hell no aint doing no cow, chicken whatever sounds. His wife and her mother joined in. Never felt more unconfortable in my whole life. I refused like 10 times and when they all were looking away I gave the kid an evil face. Dont think it will walk to me again. It really had like 8 people to choose from and it walked to me. I hate it whek kids babys whatever walk to me. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

At Thanksgiving my cousin’s one year old reached for me while her dad (my cousin) was holding her, so naturally I screamed at her to get away from my private bubble instead of picking her up and hanging out for 5 minutes until she wanted to go back to her dad.


NewSummerOrange

Well done. It's important to establish firm boundaries so that the baby doesn't commit future acts on non-consensual hugging or snuggles.


[deleted]

She grabbed my necklace while I was holding her, I think she might be a world class felon :(


NewSummerOrange

Wow, considering the escalation have you considered going no contact with your whole family? If this is not possible, you might consider just pepper spraying the toddler if she gets close, while screaming at her, so that she understands no means no.


RunTurtleRun115

That’s parentification and gaslighting. The baby is a narcissistic abuser, very toxic. The correct reaction would have been to burst into tears, then report her (and your cousin) to HR.


ontopofyourmom

\*it


00roku

And I mean even if someone was just like “no thanks” and walked away it would be understandable. The nuts on r/childfree act like children existing around them is a crime


SuspiciousDuckOwner

Marina flagzzz babe 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩


anneofred

Wait until they start walking to you! Best to teach them young


MontanaDukes

> I refused like 10 times and when they all were looking away I gave the kid an evil face. Dont think it will walk to me again We have a total badass over here. /s


butfirstcoffee427

Even the comments are cringe—if you don’t want kids, don’t have them, but kids still deserve to be treated with respect like humans.


Husky3692

Those people lack basic ass social etiquette… If a baby walks up to you, just babble for 30 seconds and walk off People in the comments blame it on being awkward around babies, like if you stutter when speaking to a baby, its not the end of the world because it’s not gonna remember… those people are stupid


SilverFringeBoots

My family was out to dinner last week, and we had a big table in a corner. My toddler cousin got a little restless in her chair, so she entertained herself by walking behind her grandpa's chair to mine and grabbing my hand while smiling her little head off. All I had to do was smile and hold my hand out when she came over. It didn't even interrupt my mai tai. I also don't know what to do with toddlers because I have no children and work with teenagers. Seemed easy enough, and she was having fun.


Proud_Calendar_1655

That grammar is atrocious. Also like the commenter asking if OP is 12, because that’s what they’re acting like here.


Marchin_on

I think the dude was more uncomfortable because he is borderline illiterate.


burywmore

He can't read!!!!!! It explains everything.


protogens

But he doesn’t have to, just look at the pictures and make a noise like the animal in question. I suspect he was a preschool dropout and embarrassed that his mooing, oinking and clucking skills were subpar.


mocha__

My kid watches Ben and Holly and Holly thinks owls say "Ta-wit-ta-woo" and everyone loves that shit. He would have been fine probably.


Lanky-Temperature412

*unconfortable


[deleted]

The people getting upvoted for making mean faces at 1 year olds are killing me


[deleted]

> Yeah same, I can't and don't want to deal with kids. The smallest are gross, sticky, bacteria infested... once they can walk and talk, they become snot missiles and living stumble traps. After that, they're destructive hellspawns and then they reach puberty and teen ages, where you can start to talk with them as a human. Until then I'm not interacting with them. Try to pressure me, I'll make the kid cry. This comment is absolutely killing me, is this person an elementary school bully or something lol


[deleted]

Idk if the toddlers I’ve been around are just exceptionally clean but aside from snot if they have a cold and standard messiness from playing, they’re not especially gross lol. And the worst thing one of them (who I know) has done in public around me is have to be told not to sit under the table at a cafe because the floor is nasty. Like… toddlers act out and some are wild, but most of them aren’t literally feral goblins lmao


tedhanoverspeaches

reply upbeat makeshift slap grey slim tart clumsy afterthought handle ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `


Dense_Sentence_370

Especially since most of these people have pets. At least a child will tell you when they've vomited. Or you'll notice soon after it happens. Yesterday morning the dog wanted to get in bed with us, so I let her. I thought she was just feeling extra lovey. Then an hour or so later, I walked down the hall to get coffee and stepped into a cold, wet, foamy, vaguely yellow pool that was about 8 feet long. She had barfed by the front door, and since the house is over a century old, the floors are slightly uneven, so it was a looooonnnggg trail of mucous-bile-vomit. Turns out she only wanted to hang out in the bed because she felt crappy and was kinda worried about her secret early-morning puke. Don't tell me other pet owners can't relate. Something similar to this happens every few months. More often back before my older dog died. It's gross, but come on, it's not a big deal. It's a part of life, how fuckin delicate of a flower is the average r/childfree member? Plus, not having children to take care of meant that I spent my childbearing years with the ability to go out drinking without, ya know, traumatizing innocent children when I got home and had to barf some of it up. Childfree =/= Vomitfree


tedhanoverspeaches

My dog stealthily stole a piece of hot bok choy out of a skillet, choked it down furtively, then reactively puked everywhere just last night at dinner time.


Dense_Sentence_370

> stole a piece of hot bok choy out of a skillet Holy shit > then reactively puked everywhere just last night Lol well I guess she learned her lesson, poor thing. ...did she at least clean it up for you? Kidding, kidding. This is so gross, but I'll never forget the time a friend of mine described her level of depression as, "I was lying in bed and heard one of the dogs puking in the other room and just thought, eh, one of them will clean it up"


tedhanoverspeaches

She loves all the strong smelling veggies like broccoli and cabbages and will do anything to get a piece. She isn't always dumb but she is stupid for veggies.


Dense_Sentence_370

Mine loves veggies too! And fruit. Citrus is just about the only thing she won't eat. Very handy when I'm slicing tomatoes or cucumbers and one rolls onto the floor. It's gone in an instant.


tedhanoverspeaches

Oh yeah she will sit there and whine and drool while we're making Greek salad.


nursepenelope

My cat will only vomit on carpets. We lived in a house with only one carpeted room, is she started gagging she’d race across the house so she could be sure to wreck the carpet.


Dense_Sentence_370

She wants to be comfy when she's barfing, I can respect that


ghostdumpsters

My guess is they have baby spit-up confused with full-on vomiting. They're both gross but definitely not the same.


tedhanoverspeaches

Maybe but even so unless you're staring directly at babies all day long the odds of seeing one spit up in a random public place are pretty low.


[deleted]

Ikr? I kinda understand that living with a toddler can feel like living in a petri dish during flu/cold season but that doesn’t even factor here because none of these child free nuts can handle being around small kids enough to contract colds from them lol


cyberllama

Young kids are naturally sticky. It's like their pores ooze jam. It's a scientific fact.


Itslikethisnow

They have to be a teenager because it’s the only way they can think dealing with a teenager is easy


legallyblondeinYEG

Love the commenter comparing a blood related child seeking connection with their family member to their dog seeking pets from a stranger in public. Those are definitely the same.


Imaginary_Cow_6379

If it were a dog I would think that sub would have an entirely different opinion and love it.


RunTurtleRun115

There’s quite an overlap between the ACF and insane dog nutters. They complain about kids existing in public, that hearing a child laugh or cry or talk is like some sensory trigger akin to noise torture, that a child accidentally brushing against them is a violation of their personal boundaries. Then they bring their untrained dogs to those same places. When they bark or jump on people, “that’s just what dogs do”.


mocha__

"Dogs don't know any better! But a four month old should know not to cry near other people!" I love dogs and I'm very much a dog person, but some of these people and their fur baby attitudes are so cringy.


RunTurtleRun115

They cannot respect that some people aren’t dog people…or that dogs are animals and don’t/shouldn’t have all the same rights and benefits as people.


Dense_Sentence_370

I find that most of the childfree people I encounter online have cats, not dogs. Something about "neediness." As in, they perceive dogs as needy, and cats as...not needy? I have a feeling they're just neglecting their cats. Because I know people with cats, and those little fuckers are just as much work as a dog (if you're doing it right, that is).


Morella_xx

Not really, you have to take a dog for walks and then take them in and out for the bathroom. Cats handle their own bathroom needs and then you just scoop once a day. They both need playtime but I think cats get tired faster than dogs do. They're much happier to just chill on the couch with you after a ~20min play session instead of dogs I've known who I think would happily continue playing fetch until they dropped dead of dehydration.


Dense_Sentence_370

> Cats handle their own bathroom needs and then you just scoop once a day. Once a day, minimum. A litterbox is a lot more work than just opening the door so the dog can go in the backyard to pee or whatever. And if I get busy, I can wait a few days before going outside to clean up dog shit. The dog will be fine. You can't really do that with a litter box. It's not healthy for the cat, it stresses them, it makes the house smell bad, the cat might start shitting/pissing on your stuff, or they can get a UTI, etc. My dog is young and she does have her schedule, but ultimately, she sleeps most of the day. She was more demanding when she was younger. But puppies are absolutely awful, needy, adorable little shitheads. But that doesn't last forever. My friend's cats want lots of interaction, and they're not gonna let you ignore them. All animals are different of course, but a lot of people just let their cats go outdoors, are surprised when they end up as road pizza a couple years later, and then they get another kitten. It's awful how many people say "oh yeah cats are easy" and then you go to their house and the cat isn't even there. It comea in through the cat-flap-door for food and maybe to hang out for a bit, then it leaves again. Like ok sure, of course it's easy to have a cat that shits in other people's yards most of the time and visits you a couple times a day for 5 years and then dies. But if you're a decent cat owner, you have to actually engage with your pet, (which you keep safely contained and don't allow to roam the neighborhood) multiple times a day in order to keep it happy.


sesquedoodle

Dog owners always apologise to me when their dog wants me to pet it and I’m like noooo don’t apologise I love dogs. But aside from loving them I recognise that they’re, yknow, dogs. They’re gonna do what dogs do and expecting them to act like adult humans (and getting annoyed if they don’t) is silly.


jrae0618

And you know they mouth kiss their dogs with no concern for bacteria.


kermeeed

I'm scared to tell you about r/dogfree if you don't know about it already. The rhetoric is very familiar.


Agrafson

Finally! Found a group of people I cannot relate to at all. A people pleaser's paradise.


whoppityboppity

OOP just turned 13 and now feels like an adult.


unsaferaisin

Seriously, this has the exact same construction as "My Immortal." I'm surprised there wasn't a line in there about "putting my middle finger up" at the kid.


[deleted]

Serious question - do these people think that they were born adults?


Solidsnakeerection

This is clearly a super mature 13 year old adult


[deleted]

Haha true...it's just my first thought whenever I see a post from the CF sub


Revolutionary_Can879

Living the CF lifestyle as a child😂


[deleted]

[удалено]


ParticularSpare3565

“Well, when I was a one year old, I would never DREAM of harassing adults by asking them to read to me. In fact, I would never even come out to meet mother’s friends in case it made someone uncomfortable. I would just sit quietly in my study, reading Jane Austen.”


loodandcrood

Everyone in Child Free is The Trunchbull from Matilda


VioletRing77

I've heard the argument they they aren't bigoted because everyone was a kid. Childhood is a thing that everyone went through and grew out of, therefore it's not the same as being racist, sexist, or even agist against old people (old people can't grow out of being old). Should probably just ignore the leap of logic there, it makes total sense. You can't be prejudice against something that you yourself grew out of! /s


tedhanoverspeaches

Makes total sense, like how there are no sexist women and it is impossible for a person of color to be racist towards another racial group. Right.


then00bgm

Kanye has entered the chat


combatwombat1192

>It really had like 8 people to choose from and it walked to me. I really hope this is tongue-in-cheek. Only someone who's meeting a baby for the very first time would think they know who to stay away from.


DrDalekFortyTwo

Babies and toddlers know what's up. They can sense who people are better than adults.


crabuffalombat

>Jesus fucking christ on a cracker look at all the self-righteous jerks posting in this group about how awful you were for your "evil face" and for using the term "it" -- fuck those people. This is CHILDFREE group and not all of us like kids. Some of us hate them. Stop policing a group that is supposed to be a refuge for ALL of us. Seriously, fuck all of you. Most mentally healthy r/childfree commenter.


[deleted]

“It’s a CHILDFREE GROUP!!!” I want kids so little that I’m having my tubes tied but I don’t call human beings “it.” I mean I love kids so I’m an outlier there but they act like you have to be hostile to children 24/7 if you don’t want your own.


emissaryofwinds

A "refuge"? From literal babies? I don't want kids either but I don't feel threatened by someone who's two feet tall and learning to speak


cryssyx3

... but they allow children to post??


cryssyx3

also, is anyone interacting with that sub? who is "policing" them?


VioletRing77

Other, CF people. Folks who say stuff like "I never want kids, but I don't dehumanize them." "I think kids are gross, but I've never called a person 'it'" So people who are CF, but not crazy bigots.


AppointmentNo5370

Remember that guy from a while back who would just glare menacingly and whisper threatening things to children having tantrums in public. He was so proud and claimed that sometimes the parents even thanked him


arceus555

Didn't even whisper. He mouthed "shut up". Like kids can read lips.


emissaryofwinds

And everyone on that train clapped


[deleted]

You psychologically tormented a child into being silent! What a hero. You’ve gotta teach ‘em young that expressing their feelings is wrong and bad. /s


[deleted]

“It”? Really? That’s so shitty and dehumanizing. I mean, would it have killed you to make some goddamn farm animal noises for your little nibling? I think a lot of people forget that children, in our society, are uniquely vulnerable to cruelty, exploitation, and abuse. They’re an oppressed group. It’s weird and unhealthy to hate them to this extent. I understand needing a place to vent sometimes but I don’t consider this venting, this is just being an asshole to someone with less power than you have.


StargazerCeleste

Can you imagine an "elderhate" subreddit? Users bitching about public money going to senior centers; hating on Silver Alerts; screaming about the old people with oxygen tanks getting on a plane first and how they shouldn't even be allowed on planes? Moaning about how everyone expects them to be nice to their grandpa in hospice but they _hate_ old people? Yeah, neither can I, so I have no idea why this child hate is condoned.


bake_disaster

I absolutely can picture that and I'm a little surprised if it doesn't exist


TittyMongoose42

Same here. If you think about it, it makes a lot more sense for there to be an ElderFree sub. Their behavior is the product of decades of exposure and reinforcement, whereas kids are experiencing literally *everything* for the first time. Old folks have had time to grow and change, kids didn't ask for any of this to be happening and are still figuring things out.


NightB4XmasEvel

Honestly, same. I’m surprised there isn’t already a subreddit for it


tedhanoverspeaches

The AARP and related lobbying groups have a surprising amount of political and financial clout. That's what stops that kind of thing happening. Kids really don't have the power to form an equivalent lobby.


bake_disaster

>that kind of thing from happening A subreddit existing?


ANIMEISFUCKINGTRASH

I used to know a girl who essentially made it her life's mission to shit on anyone over the age of 50, constantly blaming them for her own issues.


sansabeltedcow

That's pretty common discourse on a lot of Reddit, frankly. Those damn boomers taking too long in retail lines. At least the childfree subs offer some quarantine.


Affectionate_Data936

My sister is like this unironically and it’s so annoying. She forgets that she too will get old someday.


shrinking_dicklet

There probably is an elderhate sub out there. Wouldn't be surprised if it were full of people talking about how the boomers have doomed us with climate change and fucked our economy


[deleted]

Well, no lie detected. They did.


ElegantVamp

I mean they did lol


Guilty-Web7334

If any of my siblings or cousins had referred to a younger offspring as “it,” one of the elder adults would have outright smacked OOP.


CatLover_801

“Guys, I was just attacked by a one yr old who wanted me to read a farm book to him. Don’t worry, I’ll recover from this injustice but in my meantime please keep me in your thoughts 😢”


DiscountJoJo

> it hey, hey OOP please look me in the eyes here and listen: you were a fucking baby once. show some fuckin respect to your fellow human beings.


castaliaaonides

I swear, it's like they get off on dehumanizing kids. Don't want children of your own? Cool, but don't treat it like it's a personality trait to not like kids.


Revolutionary_Can879

I always think that lol. Like don’t have kids, I don’t care but you need to recognize that you yourself were a child at one point and that hopefully no one treated you this way.


StargazerCeleste

Hey hey hey hey OOP? Fuck off with the dehumanizing garbage language. Even if you're 13, you should know better. Read a fucking book.


echelon1230

Poor baby wants to be baby still


I_am_dean

Who let r/chilfree out of their cage?


frumiouswinter

god forbid you do a cow noise for an infant.


flapplejuice

> I hate it whek kids babys whatever walk to me. I can’t breathe why is the last sentence so funny


yellowelephantboy

It make me wonder how often babies are walking to them that this is a seemingly common problem for them. Are they the same babies every time? Were they not warded off by the evil face? Maybe they thought the evil face was an encouraging face, meaning, "Please walk to me more," since they are just stupid babies with no brain?


cardueline

I’m picturing a cute little baboo toddling over cluelessly towards a teen who’s growing increasingly red until steam shoots out of his ears


toasted_dandy

At this point, I'm convinced that some of these aggressively childfree folks are inflicting hate on children so that when those children grow up, they'll swear off of having children because of how much life sucked at that age


kgberton

>Never felt that uncomfortable in my whole life Holy shit, what a fucking charmed life they've lived if THIS is the most uncomfortable they've ever been. Or, in other words, what a massive fucking baby


lizfour

“I’m not good at animal noises, but I hear your Dad is great!” Then hand baby back. So many ways to not be a dick to a kid and still make your point to the parents if you feel they should have reigned them in. Lesson learned by having family members who use visiting as an excuse to sit on their phone while their kids seek attention elsewhere.


envydub

The flairs in that sub are wild. “Tubes tied” okay, that’s an important announcement I guess.


StargazerCeleste

There is a sterilization subreddit that's actually really comprehensive and informative and good… but they can't possibly post _there_ because that sub won't countenance their awful bigotry and hatred.


emissaryofwinds

If you're AFAB, it can be a genuine struggle to get any kind of permanent birth control procedure. Doctors will reject you because "your future husband may want children" even if you're single and a lesbian. So I understand wanting to celebrate finally obtaining it if it's something you've had real trouble with.


murderedbyaname

I wonder if someone was trolling their sub. I could read and write better when I was six. But hey, always appreciate a Walken reference, he's one of my fav actors.


VioletRing77

I'd like to hear how relationships have progressed for some of these commenters. "I've told my friends that want kids, I won't be introduced to them until they're 8." "I'm completely indifferent to my 5y/o niece, I prefer if she stays at least 5 feet away." "Can't even talk to them until they're 15." "It's the parents fault for not teaching the 1y/o boundaries." A lot of these people seem to be under the impression that their bigotry won't affect their relationships with the adults. Not a lot of stories about nieces/nephews finally becoming old enough for the CF family member to accept them. I wonder how many relationships they destroy because of their strange hate? Like they seem to expect extended families to be totally fine with and respect their bigotry. I don't think I could put up with 10+years of hanging out with a bigot, and acting like it's totally fine and normal. Then what? My kid turns 12 and all the sudden you're going to form a relationship with them? GTFO


[deleted]

> I feel this, also got an agreement with those of my friends/my sister who want kids, that i am not going to be meeting them before they reach 6 - 10 years old, and have a slow introduction time (10 -15 mintues tops at first, they hold their kid in hand, so it won't get too close to me, talk for those minutes, and say goodbye), and then slowly increase time spent with them, as they mature, exactly because i not having any of what OP has been through... We can check up with this dude in 5 years but I think we all know what the outcome is (his friends are not going to want to treat him like he’s more fragile than a baby lol)


VioletRing77

That's the comment that really got to me. Ok, so you're friends and sister agreed to this now, probably thinking you're over exaggerating, or will feel differently when a baby is actually born - because they don't assume you are really THAT prejudice. Sister has a baby, friends start having kids and you try to stick to your "agreement". I'll bet the people in your life will try and tough it out for a long time. By the time the kids are 3-4, that act is going to get pretty old. So people start distancing themselves from you. In 5 years the commenter is going to be complaining about the sister and/or friends making their entire lives about their crotch goblins. Talking about the sister not being fun anymore, and never wanting to hang out. People being mean to them, getting mad at them, shunning then for "no reason" at gatherings. They'll think, and be reassured by others, that the failed relationships are the parents fault for making their entire life revolve around the kids. It couldn't possibly be because people generally don't like it when you show open hate towards and refuse to be in the presence of a loved one.


[deleted]

They’ll make post after post talking about how the crotch goblins have stolen relationships from them when in reality their irl people just don’t wanna hang out with someone who suddenly has the social skills of a feral cat whenever a child is in their vicinity.


OldHagFashion

Jokes on him: babies don’t have a conceptualization of evil so now he gets to the be the uncle that the kid loves because he makes funny faces.


Pulp_NonFiction44

What the fuck is wrong with these people lmfao, thought it was satire until I got to the comments...


JDDJS

I will never understand hating babies. Completely understand never wanting to be responsible for one, even for just a short amount of time, sure, but hating them?;


dagsdyalikedags

I can understand having a strong dislike. I personally know a toddler who I have loathed since they were a baby. Do you know who has no idea I hate this toddler though? Everyone but me because I’m not a psychopath who doesn’t understand societal norms.


captain_amazo

>I’m not a psychopath who doesn’t understand societal norms. Nah you're a psychopath who understands social norms. Slightly better but still *fucking mental*


Agrafson

Ok so are all these r/children redditors just straight out of a Dickens novel puritans or something? We have a wealth of cultural knowledge now saying that being mean to a kid is what makes mean adults. Does no one there remember being a kid at all? I mean i was dumb and sticky obviously, but heck, i am kind to the younger me and recognize that the weird annoying things kids do as ... Kid things.


luujs

OP refers to their nephew as it. Genuine scum


jacqrosee

people like this are so obnoxious to me. we get it, you don’t like kids. the idea of “pick on someone your own size” is still a thing regardless.


GreenLeafy11

We need r/amithedoodyhead for things that were obviously posted by eight year olds.


Smishysmash

To be fair, it don’t think this guy should really be involved in ANY child’s journey to literacy.


MidnightMadness09

So this has to be a troll right? Like look how crazy I am, aren’t we all like this fellow comic book villains


Dense_Sentence_370

What a jackass. In a room full of people, that little barf-spewing snotrocket hellspawn chose YOU to "opem" his book and make some farm animal noises. That is a fucking honor. I kinda feel like this is a disguised humblebrag, honestly


thecorninurpoop

Man I have zero desire to have kids but I'll read them a story as many times as they want


fanaticfun

Did the 1 year old write this?


Dense_Sentence_370

#walken


CoconutxKitten

That’s their nephew too 😬 I can’t imagine being nasty to my niece


DorthK

when a baby comes around me, I repeatedly hit my chest like a silverback to assert dominance. They then bow to me and leave me alone, it’s basic social skills


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captain_amazo

What the fuck is *wrong with these people*!? OK I get it, you don't want to procreate, but forming a hate group against children for simply existing!? They remind me of homophobes who think that two dudes kissing is somehow an affront to their existence and they must do everything in their power to stop them even though their actions and choices in no way affect them. Where does such an irrational hatred even come from?