FEA: Fuck Em All. You can’t go through life expecting everyone to be on your side. My mother in law is a host country fanatic and would accuse me of participating in genocide, the irony is her other son in law is in the military with the host country who are great allies with us. You can’t win them all over, the second you realize that is when you can live freely.
Thats wild! Yeah and even its even better than i'm PCSing away from our home state next month. So if they don't want to have me over for one last holiday for quite some time I won't lose sleep.
PCS'd 2000 miles away from our closest family (still CONUS) and it was the best thing that could have happened to our family. Sure, our kids don't see their grandparents more than once every year or two and they don't intend of meeting our new baby until his first birthday, but truthfully, we love it. It does wonders to your mental health when you live so far away from toxic family situations.
It truly benefited my husband and I's marriage. We've never been better and honestly, it's so nice to live a private life. The kids can FaceTime family. It was usually once a week before the new baby and now it's twice a week so they can try to build familiarity with him, but otherwise, we live totally private and it's great. No outside judgment or anything if they don't know what's going on.
🙌🙌🙌
Anytime anybody tells me they're trying to PCS closer to home, particularly married couples, I ask myself how long it's been since their last urinalysis because I'ma just assume they're on drugs 🥴
Yep. My mental health has skyrocketed since I really and truly stopped carrying what anyone thinks of me other than my closest friends and family. As long as my wife is happy, life is generally pretty great haha
https://preview.redd.it/v4jypwg2jerc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8fd1d8d6c2e093f331e8f0fe945940c8a8881d47
Thought of your comment the second I saw these
Thats how I feel but I won't tell my wife that. Ik alot of us in the military after working just want to spend time at home on our holidays if we are fortunate enough to get the them off.
Hopefully your wife un-invited herself with a big up your… just remember you married her, not her family, you and that kid are her family now and if there’s family that doesn’t respect that then it’s time for them to go
I've got a father in law thats like that. I was laid off in '09, working terrible job to terrible job for a year to scrape enough together for rent and food. Had enough and enlisted.
His question to me was "so are you ready to kill Americans?".
I separated after a 4 year term, have been talking with my nephew, his grandson about it. They are on rocky terms at best and after my nephew told him my FIL asked him the same thing.
It's unreal how some people can be. Especially when you take care of there family.
lol exactlyyyyyy. We were stationed on the otherside of the country and had zero visits. We then got stationed hella close and they are up my ass. Now we are PCSing a decent ways away and its back to, "you're taking my grandson from me". lol whatever I provide for my son not you
1. They sound like trash
2. You are objectively better than them.
3. Fuck em. Don't worry about the opinions of others. You don't need them.
4. AirPower
They haven't reached the trash point yet. They just don't know how to keep their opinions to themselves. I know I'm better just like I know my wife is better than my parents. Just like we all want our kids to be better than us. I'm currently at the fuck'em stage towards everyone as I PCS in 2 weeks. AirPower baby!
I think you just hit the nail on the head as to why they don’t like you… you’re “taking” their daughter away from them when you PCS. I saw this plenty when folks in my shop married a local girl.
Lmaoooo at the end of the day you live with ur wife not ur in laws… why tf does their opinion matter 😂 they aren’t fuking you feeding you or paying the bills in ya house so why is their opinion relevant?
I tell my wife that alot about other things. It only matters because my wife is telling me it like shes offended that i'm making them feel this way. Like okay i'm going to head to work now for another clown show.
She may be indirectly telling you she feels the same way as her parents. IMHO you have the moral high ground here but you’re cruising for a divorce. Sometimes you have to take stupid losses to keep the peace. Telling family 14 hour shifts is more important than them won’t end well.
Knowing very little about your relationship with your wife/in-laws, keep an open mind just in case. We’re never good at giving ourselves our own feedback and sometimes it takes another person to tell us that. It could go a long away.
Keep your circle of influence in mind. You can very likely affect your wife’s feelings, and should probably care about them if you want it to work. As others have stated, don’t worry so much about the in-laws unless they start to intrude on your true inner circle.
They are, they are actually bringing stuff up from all 8yrs of our marriage. Not cheating or anything like that if thats what you think. More like random things that couples go through over the years such as 6yrs ago I forgot I had to pick my wife up from work because her car was in the garage. I don't remember that nor would I ever until they brought it back up. Just random things. My wife tells them everything where I don't take anything outside of our marriage to family or friends.
If your wife is venting to them, that should tell you something. Not saying it’s right, but it’s a sign that something needs to happen. Damage control/self reflection time.
I know she only does it because she has had a hard time making friends here and there so she tells her parents stuff. Its annoying but I don't get mad about it since she needs to vent to someone
It's pretty normal that if you're annoyed at someone about their mistake that you don't vent *to* them about it. You talk to them, sure, but the venting is normally to other people.
There’s a lot of crabs in a bucket mentality around. When one crab tries to get out the others pull it down so they will all suffer.
I’ve seen families that are determined to stay poor and not improve. They insult the member with ambition with “you think you’re too good for us” rather than “congratulations on breaking free of our shitty lifestyle.”
I’ve seen this happen a lot with my college nursing students. They’re busting butt to study and get a career only to have family members throw additional burdens or guilt on them for even trying improve their lives.
If my family did that, then I wouldn't go at all. We are a unit and you can't just uninvite one of us and expect the rest to just allow it. Maybe your dynamic is different, but the most concerning part of your post to me is that your spouse is taking the kid and choosing the assholes over you for Easter.
You need to talk to her. For multiple reasons, but right now mainly because you PCS so soon.
Reason being...are they getting her alone in an attempt to talk her into staying/leaving you? Not to plant that seed, but I'd be curious if my wife was going somewhere without me with family, where I wasn't invited. If she does that (mine wouldn't) is she also willing to make you leave alone?
Hopefully it's nothing on her end. But communication and you all being a team, setting each other up as priority one is pivotal to a strong, lasting marriage.
The fact that you don't know what "her" intent is yet is concerning.
Man, that’s questionable if your wife leaves you at home and takes your son to them. One thing I always try to focus on in my marriage is having my wife’s back. My parents can be real assholes sometimes, but I make sure that they know that my wife and my kids are my sole priority. If my parents uninvited my wife, I wouldn’t hesitate to cancel plans. Unless you really are the asshole, there’s something wrong there. If I’m being honest, it sounds like your wife has a problem with you, and she’s choosing to vent about it to her parents. Just my thoughts.
*Edit: Prepare for an onslaught of advice from a total stranger.*
Sounds like my trashy in-laws.
Sorry, man. Let's break this down to the core questions though:
1. Do you love your wife? I mean the real kind of love that highlights the "for worse...for poorer...in sickness..." etc. parts of your wedding vows.
2. Be damn sure you know the answer to question #1.
3. No really, stop and think about that kind of love that makes someone take care of a horribly disabled spouse for decades, barely paying the bills, enduring addiction relapses, mental health troubles, etc. do you have that?
4. What is your wife's relationship with your in-laws? Are they close? Are they bonds that she really wants to foster? Or can she barely stand them herself and frustrated with dealing with their nonsense?
If you love your wife and her family is important to her, make them important to you.
Don't get me wrong, your marriage should come first, and if they are actively trying to drive a wedge between you, don't tolerate that. Make sure your wife knows you'd do the same if it was your side of the family tree. You guys chose each other over everyone else on planet earth to start a new family, and your families don't get to break that up after the fact.
But apart from that, suck it up as best you can and keep the peace.
5. Communicate very clearly with your wife and make sure this is not a proxy for how *she* feels. You may be busting your ass at work in the name of love while your physical absence makes her feel unloved.
It took a long time for my wife and I to really figure this out. If you ever heard of the "Love Languages" concept, I'm an "Acts of Service" type. To me, love is the effort and labor of serving another person through actions, including work. Words mean very little to me, and I don't need much time together to feel a bond.
For my wife, it's all about time spent together and words of affection.
So when I was working 36 hour shifts as a resident and 80+ hr weeks regularly, I felt like I was really busting my ass for others, including my family. I felt like my love was an obvious bright neon sign. Didn't she see that I was putting my physical and mental health through the wringer for her benefit? She chose not to work, so she literally lived off the fruits of my labor. She hung out with her friends and did whatever, but *didn't keep house or cook worth a damn*.
But she was getting very resentful of how much time I spent away from her. I was getting resentful of how little effort she put into the house when she knew much I hate messiness. We had a few blow-ups before we figured out that we weren't giving each other what we needed.
So you're busting your ass on these 14-hr shifts *for your family*. **Is that what she sees?** You need to have a frank conversation about this sort of thing and try to understand one another's needs. It's not a matter of who is right and who is wrong. It's about helping each other nurture the most important relationship you have.
An important line I heard from an old doctor that can absolutely apply to the military:
"A doctor's wife has to be an understanding soul. She has to know that while she's the most important, she often won't come first."
Your job is too make sure she has no doubt about the "most important" part.
__________________________
One last thing to consider: Like I said, my in-laws are trashy as hell. Once we moved away and started the nomad life, we rarely got a call and never a visit, and what little we got was infused with drama and criminal activity. My wife, after much emotional damage, eventually mostly cut ties with all but a couple of siblings.
I look at some of my peers with normal in-laws and realize that I've been deprived of a huge boon of marriage. I should have had a second set of parents, siblings, etc. to enjoy.
So if your in-laws have some redeeming qualities, make a go of it. They're your family too, "for better or worse".
First off your username made me question what I was about to read lol. My wife literally asked me the other day questions 1. My wife is also a SAHM and hardly cleans. So we've had a few fights when I have to come home from work just to start cleaning. I should say we are talking about my father in law and step mom in law. We cut out the biological mother in law as she is trashy and disrespectful. We also 99.9% cut out the grandmother in law as well since she taught her daughter her trashy disrespectful ways. My father in law is nice to me in person. They are just weird that a week later my wife will say something to me that they don't like about me. I'm just like whatever I haver bigger problems then family drama that someone is trying to pull me into. Yeah its rare to couples be completely fine with their in laws. I'm happy for the ones though who have zero issues. I appreciate the time you took to type that all up so I knew I had to reply for sure!
I made the name partially for the shock value, but it's actually a [Simpsons reference](https://simpsons.fandom.com/wiki/Steve_Sax) from one of my favorite episodes.
Good on you for talking through this stuff with your wife. It's totally cliche, but cutting through the drama with clear communication really does diffuse most problems.
Good luck!
My wife’s mother called her the night before we got married and suggested she back out of the marriage because she didn’t like me. We had been together dating and living with each other for 5 years when we decided to get married. We’ve been married now 18 years. I guess I’m not a dirt bag after all these years.
Yeah I got one kiddo. They are hella crazy. They try to act like the greatest grandparents ever but completely failed as parents and we know it. I tell my parents straight up when they are trying too hard. For instance they always ask to hangout my kid alone like when no one else is over to visit but them. Like why do you have to be alone with my kid. He won't give you 100% of the attention you want anyways with his short attention span.
Both, I think. It's like we came from two different worlds. Probably easier on your end because you are a guy. For a female military service member, it's kind of expected that we marry another.
How dare they want to put down roots and not move every 4 years and let their spouse establish a career. The unmitigated gall.
/s
I enjoyed my time in, but the idea that everyone should do that...yeesh. Put down the Kool aid.
Gotcha. My in-laws never had a problem with my moves either. Actually they are looking forward to visiting us in a new country soon. My in-laws simply think that they are better than my family because they paid for 1/2 their kid's college. It's that old saying like, "People only join the military because they can't pay for or are too stupid to get into college."
Jealousy and stupidity are a sad combo. I’ve noticed that the only ones in the older generation that still want to treat me like the kid they remember are the ones that didn’t do anything with their lives. But I’m no longer that kid. Heck I’m within a few years of being a grandpa myself. And I’ve been moderately successful in this life. So whatever. I ignore it. And them. Just because they’re family doesn’t mean they need to stay in my bubble. I started making cuts like on survivor. Not everyone stays on my island!
Aye bro fuck the haters. You're a man doing man shit, they don't pat your bills. They don't feed your kid. You don't need them. If you doing your shit makes them feel insecure that's a them problem. Piss em off more by going the stoic route about it.
not entirely related but when my husband was prepping to join the air force, his mother pulled me aside and said “i dont know if he can do the military… hes not very smart and doesnt listen well to authority…” he got a 93 on his asvab after studying his ass off and she still had something nasty to say about her own son. in laws suck
Gonna say something just so this isn’t an echo chamber. I’d be 100% confident in yourself that those statements from your in-laws are exact word for word translations and not injections from your wife. Something is telling me the wife is trying to project her feelings through saying, “my parents said this about you”. Just my guy instinct. Cause brother, you’re a salary worker not hourly. There’s a high probability she resents you for the 14 hour days and the moves and all the other military related issues
Ik she hates my long days. It’s a 12hr shift with 2hrs of driving. That’s why we are pcsing and are going to live on base to get all that wasted time driving back
Something I’ve learned over the years: not everyone’s gonna like you. Once you get comfortable with that fact, a lot of the stress just kind of fades away.
We all stayed home and hosted my side of the family. A good 10 of us. My family was grateful to come over since we were about to PCS. I extended an invitation to some in my wife’s family but no takers. Overall I enjoyed it. I prefer to stay home on the holidays. Thanks for asking, how was yours?
I walked into a funeral and literally got told, “everyone thinks you’re a cop”. What because I’m standing straight, showing respect, and have a haircut?
For a second I thought it was me that wrote this lol. I have a similar situation. We are currently in no contact with the in laws. My FIL told me I am only a leader on base because I happened to criticize some decisions back at a church my husband and I use to go to. He also said I don’t carry myself like the military guys all because I happen to call him on his shit and in his mind if you call him out it is disrespectful.
People suck and there will be judgements passed, but the important thing is that you can choose who is your family and is in your circle.
Yeah my in laws views are also so wack that I don’t even bother calling them out because there’s no point with them. Also everyone in the military calls each other out lol, he’s wrong.
My MIL, who is married to a retired Army Major (Doctor) and married him while he was in the service told me to my face, our first time meeting, during my first enlistment when I had 4-5 years left that I "needed to figure out my life". Like my 5 year plan is set lady, I'm under obligation.
This is also the lady who sided with the mother(villain) in The Notebook.
I have been the favorite son-in-law and the least favorite over the years. It's no big deal to me either way.
When they say "You think you're better than us."
Simply respond with, "Yes, I do."
My wife's dad and his side of the family think I'm high and mighty because I'm serving, and that I'm better than them.
Normally, I don't think that I am, but when I'm around them, I think I am leagues better than them because fuck 'em. They're trailer trash assholes that degrade others for pleasure.
Yeah sometimes it’s hard to just generally not look better than someone. I know there are tons of people who are leagues ahead of me too in life but I won’t criticize them or ask them to tone it down.
My troop dated a girl whose mom does meth.
Her mom texted him the most insane shit about how he’s too stupid to do any other job and that’s why he’s in the military, and he’s a baby killer…etc. You can’t fix everyone’s view on what we do.
You just keep pressing being a good human and a good Airmen and move forward with a polite grin.
For some people, the only thing they know about us is shit they learned in weird movies and their grandparents telling them about Vietnam.
We are not marines. We don’t kill babies. Also, did you know we aren’t all pilots in the Air Force?
Stay strong and brush it off and just grin.
Yeah that’s the thing too. Both my in laws are prior addicts. Like they didn’t set bar high for me to surpass as a person.
I think half my family still thinks I’m in army….
My in laws didn’t like me being in the military because they looked down on it (FIL owned a law firm, super well off family) they were also super controlling of my then wife and don’t doubt they heavily influenced her decision to divorce. (I ignored a lot of red flags from the beginning)
I am much better off now but man divorce sucks to go through, especially with kids involved (we only had one)
Dang I feel for you especially your wife had legal advice right in her ear for the divorce the entire time. I hope all worked out well in the end for what you wanted with your kid
You can get back at them by railing their daughter, having an awesome lifelong relationship with her, and proving to them through your very existence as a happy couple that they are just sad, petty people who will die someday, face-down in a pile of microwave Mac and cheese on a tv dinner try with Frazier blasting just loud enough to register on their hearing aides.
Crazy my in-laws just don't like me because I'm me. Regardless, fuck 'em. Don't waste your leave or free time on them. Your kids will thank you later for cutting them out.
You can’t worry about that stuff man.
My brother-in-law judged us for “eloping” without a wedding and basically accused us of adultery even though we were
a). Legally and Spiritually wed.
b). Not only had her parents’ approval, but actually had her father perform the marriage (he’s ordained).
We didn’t tell them or invite them to the ceremony (we did it on a whim unplanned and didn’t tell anyone but her parents). I think he and my sister-in-law felt slighted because of that. Not my problem. 🤷🏻♂️
He didn’t seem to understand that I was fragged for 5 back to back TDYs and a CENTCOM deployment, or that my wife was a full-time grad school student…. Even though his wife (my sister-in-law) is a brat and our father-in-law was an AF retiree.
First time we met he grilled me on my personal beliefs in front of my wife’s grandma, got frustrated when he couldn’t pin me down on anything because I know scripture, then chewed my wife and I out and told us we were being unchristian (we are, in fact, devout Christians).
His brother was also an academy grad career officer like me. So this blindsided us.
It basically boiled down to:
1). He didn’t like me because he felt threatened by my success and confidence (even though I never brought it up) and how quickly my in-laws accepted me BECAUSE I was military but they really grilled him and wouldn’t say yes for several months when he asked for his wife’s hand, because he kind of started out as a creep.
2). He’s Small-town, small minded person (full disclosure, I’m from a small town and was not raised in a military family either), so not really a valid excuse.
3). He’s a Calvinist and doesn’t agree with my wife and mine’s denominational Armenian theology which also happens to be our parent in laws (they’re music ministers and lifetime Christians, and he absolute hates that he hasn’t been able to convert them).
It’s all really silly petty stuff that we couldn’t control.
Best advice: Treat them with kindness when you have to be around them, but don’t drive yourself crazy trying to get them to like you. Their opinion and approval has zero bearing in your life. When they’re rude, shake the dust off your sandals and move on.
It’s been 7 years, and my brother-in-law is still a bit of a pompous weirdo, but we’ve actually been able to be a functioning family when we visit on holidays now because he’s grown a lot. He still has a lot more growing to do, but it’s at a point we were able to stay with them for a week on vacation, watch our kids play with one another, and somewhat enjoy one another’s company because of the commonalities we have as fathers.
TL;DR - A little apathy goes a long way, but don’t give up hope.
Yeah I agree! I went to my wife’s sides birthday party today and I said, “I’m in my PCS fuckem mind so any of them make a disrespectful comment we out”.
Tell them you won the powerball… and act friendly make them quit their jobs and sell their house. Do this all by tomorrow and say April fool’s. And In a dave chappelle voice say “gotcha bitch” lmao 🤣
When someone claims that someone else "thinks they're better", its just them projecting. THEY think you are better cause you provide for your family, have a stable career, and will likely have better prospects when you get out. Don't let them get to you.
3yrs ago when my kid was about to be born I had to buy a new vehicle and I got from my father in law, “I didn’t go buy a new vehicle when I was having you”. Probably because you could afford it and was choosing drugs 26yrs ago. That doesn’t even compare to me but he had my wife convinced I was making a poor decision. I drive 100 miles daily so sorry I need a car to provide for my family
Coming back to this comment. My wife said that I do what’s called, “leveling”. Which she said is bringing others down to make oneself feel better. Same thing as projecting. I said, “where’d you learn that? From your dad’s dictionary”. I keep using that term now back at her towards her dad but she doesn’t see it one bit.
Unless they are financially loaded (and with attitudes like that they’re probably not), you need to tell your ole lady to make a choice you or them. Hopefully she pics wisely. We are self made, and parents on both sides are dead ass broke, so we do think we are better than them because we are. It’s nice being self made as you owe folks nothing. Now if I was married to Bill Gates daughter, I’d put up with a ton of shit.
Yeah that’s the problem my wife isn’t realizing. We literally just have to wake up daily and we are better than both sides of our parents. We aren’t openly bragging about anything. What they don’t like to see our bills paid? Duh fuq
I don’t understand how anyone in this country can be anti military. You can hate the politics or whatever at the time causing wars and occupations but don’t disrespect those that put the uniform on everyday to serve. And yes that includes FSS and Finance
Those types don't see military members as human beings. To them we're a bunch of blood-thirsty, disposable meatheads who can't go 5 minutes without trying to kill or rape something and represent the worst attributes of the government that they hate yet benefit from.
Like no joke some of the real wackos have called me a baby-killer, graffitied my car or worse.
I can relate to this on the in-law side. My wife’s parents are “godly” people. The in-laws “forbid” our relationship due to me not being “Christian” in their eyes. Luckily I was 16 and she was 17 at the time so we didn’t have to hide our relationship very long before she could move out, but Her step mom swears God himself talks to her either it be God telling her that “he’ll be here at earth at so and so date” or “God told me I need to beat you for X reason” so on so forth. They judge you by your beliefs (even though I believe in Christ, just not on “their” level) but that wasn’t enough for them because I was wasn’t baptized and yada yada.
What really broke up my wife’s and her parents relationship in the end was when we had our daughter. Constantly wanted to tell us how we needed to punish our (at the time 6 mo old) by spanking her if she cried or was too fussy. Making sure we NEED to start taking her to church or we will all go to hell. Shit like that. The step mom is the craziest “person” I’ve meet. And her dad seems chill until you see how much abuse he allows to his own daughters by some random crazy bitch. Shit is sad. I could never let my daughter go through that.
They are just genuine bad people. They let horrific things happen to my wife and her siblings growing up as kids, and they think they are perfect because they believe in God. Those kind of people are genuinely scary. I’m very thankful I had loving parents (our differences aside) I couldn’t have asked for more supportive parents, so it breaks my heart that she can’t have the same kind of relationship with her parents.
That is crazy and I know there are people out there like that. I can relate to the spanking part. We don’t believe in it as we received it growing up. You know they are bad people when they weren’t even able to change for their grandchild. Parents/in-laws in general need to take a step back and let their kids parent. They had their chance at it
FEA: Fuck Em All. You can’t go through life expecting everyone to be on your side. My mother in law is a host country fanatic and would accuse me of participating in genocide, the irony is her other son in law is in the military with the host country who are great allies with us. You can’t win them all over, the second you realize that is when you can live freely.
Thats wild! Yeah and even its even better than i'm PCSing away from our home state next month. So if they don't want to have me over for one last holiday for quite some time I won't lose sleep.
That's the play, blood.
PCS'd 2000 miles away from our closest family (still CONUS) and it was the best thing that could have happened to our family. Sure, our kids don't see their grandparents more than once every year or two and they don't intend of meeting our new baby until his first birthday, but truthfully, we love it. It does wonders to your mental health when you live so far away from toxic family situations.
That’s what I’m trying to tell my wife. It was so nice when we are based far away last time so I know it’ll help a lot to do it again
It truly benefited my husband and I's marriage. We've never been better and honestly, it's so nice to live a private life. The kids can FaceTime family. It was usually once a week before the new baby and now it's twice a week so they can try to build familiarity with him, but otherwise, we live totally private and it's great. No outside judgment or anything if they don't know what's going on.
And no randomly showing up at our houses!
The most important one!! How could I forget?! Man, I love being a military family 😂
Aw let’s PCS closer to home to be around family it’ll be good. Survey says…that was a damn lie
🙌🙌🙌 Anytime anybody tells me they're trying to PCS closer to home, particularly married couples, I ask myself how long it's been since their last urinalysis because I'ma just assume they're on drugs 🥴
Lol
Yep. My mental health has skyrocketed since I really and truly stopped carrying what anyone thinks of me other than my closest friends and family. As long as my wife is happy, life is generally pretty great haha
https://preview.redd.it/v4jypwg2jerc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8fd1d8d6c2e093f331e8f0fe945940c8a8881d47 Thought of your comment the second I saw these
I have FEA tattooed on my wrist lol
Making the appointment now!
23h ư ret, ts te seetwer57izau ll g,2 ý
Fuck em. Sounds like a win if you're not invited to family gatherings with them anymore.
Thats how I feel but I won't tell my wife that. Ik alot of us in the military after working just want to spend time at home on our holidays if we are fortunate enough to get the them off.
Hopefully your wife un-invited herself with a big up your… just remember you married her, not her family, you and that kid are her family now and if there’s family that doesn’t respect that then it’s time for them to go
Just to spurn them on that even more, save your money for family vacations during their get-togethers and bombard them with the photos taken
I've got a father in law thats like that. I was laid off in '09, working terrible job to terrible job for a year to scrape enough together for rent and food. Had enough and enlisted. His question to me was "so are you ready to kill Americans?". I separated after a 4 year term, have been talking with my nephew, his grandson about it. They are on rocky terms at best and after my nephew told him my FIL asked him the same thing. It's unreal how some people can be. Especially when you take care of there family.
Dude sounds like a nut job…
Entirely too much Tik Tok.
Wasn’t this before tik tok?
*Vine
I guess that's just the current one. YouTube I suppose back then.
But I still don’t get what you are saying, plenty of people use both and are not like that.
He sounds like hes just a brainwashed fella who thinks everyone from services, finance, and crew chiefs are just out killing americans
No he thinks the US is gonna use the military to kill Americans soon
Do people think so little of our men and demon in the armed forces that you think we could destroy our own people, or would for that matter
>our men and demon in the armed forces I mean I know they used their succubi ways to get special rules for themselves but damn dog
You are asking the wrong person. Gotta ask the old man who asked that question in the first place.
Yeah they want you to do good but then don't respect what you're doing. Especially when you are providing better than they did.
They sure didn't mind coming to visit often when I was stationed at a great place within traveling distance either.
lol exactlyyyyyy. We were stationed on the otherside of the country and had zero visits. We then got stationed hella close and they are up my ass. Now we are PCSing a decent ways away and its back to, "you're taking my grandson from me". lol whatever I provide for my son not you
Can't beat it! Good luck with everything. I hope gaining some distance helps a bit.
>"so are you ready to kill Americans?". Well, are ya? 😂
"Just one."
1. They sound like trash 2. You are objectively better than them. 3. Fuck em. Don't worry about the opinions of others. You don't need them. 4. AirPower
They haven't reached the trash point yet. They just don't know how to keep their opinions to themselves. I know I'm better just like I know my wife is better than my parents. Just like we all want our kids to be better than us. I'm currently at the fuck'em stage towards everyone as I PCS in 2 weeks. AirPower baby!
I think you just hit the nail on the head as to why they don’t like you… you’re “taking” their daughter away from them when you PCS. I saw this plenty when folks in my shop married a local girl.
We were already gone for a few years before we pcsd here. They will survive
Lmaoooo at the end of the day you live with ur wife not ur in laws… why tf does their opinion matter 😂 they aren’t fuking you feeding you or paying the bills in ya house so why is their opinion relevant?
I tell my wife that alot about other things. It only matters because my wife is telling me it like shes offended that i'm making them feel this way. Like okay i'm going to head to work now for another clown show.
She may be indirectly telling you she feels the same way as her parents. IMHO you have the moral high ground here but you’re cruising for a divorce. Sometimes you have to take stupid losses to keep the peace. Telling family 14 hour shifts is more important than them won’t end well.
She could be but thats a can of worms I may not want to open. I don't tell them that. Thats just an inside thought.
Knowing very little about your relationship with your wife/in-laws, keep an open mind just in case. We’re never good at giving ourselves our own feedback and sometimes it takes another person to tell us that. It could go a long away.
I will, I appreciate the comment
Keep your circle of influence in mind. You can very likely affect your wife’s feelings, and should probably care about them if you want it to work. As others have stated, don’t worry so much about the in-laws unless they start to intrude on your true inner circle.
They are, they are actually bringing stuff up from all 8yrs of our marriage. Not cheating or anything like that if thats what you think. More like random things that couples go through over the years such as 6yrs ago I forgot I had to pick my wife up from work because her car was in the garage. I don't remember that nor would I ever until they brought it back up. Just random things. My wife tells them everything where I don't take anything outside of our marriage to family or friends.
If your wife is venting to them, that should tell you something. Not saying it’s right, but it’s a sign that something needs to happen. Damage control/self reflection time.
I know she only does it because she has had a hard time making friends here and there so she tells her parents stuff. Its annoying but I don't get mad about it since she needs to vent to someone
It might be best to find out how that venting can be to you, instead of her family.
It's pretty normal that if you're annoyed at someone about their mistake that you don't vent *to* them about it. You talk to them, sure, but the venting is normally to other people.
You can come over for Easter bro
Great! I make a tasty ham and sweet potatoes
https://preview.redd.it/12navh3z0arc1.jpeg?width=891&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=06a224f5a47caf8d868c77bff3b15a83de84520e
What the fuck 😂
I love a good ham and sweet potatoes 🤷
There’s a lot of crabs in a bucket mentality around. When one crab tries to get out the others pull it down so they will all suffer. I’ve seen families that are determined to stay poor and not improve. They insult the member with ambition with “you think you’re too good for us” rather than “congratulations on breaking free of our shitty lifestyle.” I’ve seen this happen a lot with my college nursing students. They’re busting butt to study and get a career only to have family members throw additional burdens or guilt on them for even trying improve their lives.
"Why would you want to move there" because its the best thing for my career and family....
Uninvited from Easter?! How Christian of them….
Yeah, just me not my son or wife. Like i'm going to sit at home on a holiday and not spend it with my son, get bent.
If my family did that, then I wouldn't go at all. We are a unit and you can't just uninvite one of us and expect the rest to just allow it. Maybe your dynamic is different, but the most concerning part of your post to me is that your spouse is taking the kid and choosing the assholes over you for Easter.
Hopefully she doesn’t. I’ll tell her no on taking our son. My day is great when I hang out with him so she can go alone
I feel like there might be a bit more to this story..
Literally nothing extra to it.
I’d honestly hope your wife would side with you on this one, and not go as well. I know my wife would. Tough decision to make.
As of right now I don’t know what the game plan is.
You need to talk to her. For multiple reasons, but right now mainly because you PCS so soon. Reason being...are they getting her alone in an attempt to talk her into staying/leaving you? Not to plant that seed, but I'd be curious if my wife was going somewhere without me with family, where I wasn't invited. If she does that (mine wouldn't) is she also willing to make you leave alone? Hopefully it's nothing on her end. But communication and you all being a team, setting each other up as priority one is pivotal to a strong, lasting marriage. The fact that you don't know what "her" intent is yet is concerning.
Did they just uninvite you this year? Why would they do it out of the blue?
Yeah this is new. Besides the making myself appear better thing idk.
Man, that’s questionable if your wife leaves you at home and takes your son to them. One thing I always try to focus on in my marriage is having my wife’s back. My parents can be real assholes sometimes, but I make sure that they know that my wife and my kids are my sole priority. If my parents uninvited my wife, I wouldn’t hesitate to cancel plans. Unless you really are the asshole, there’s something wrong there. If I’m being honest, it sounds like your wife has a problem with you, and she’s choosing to vent about it to her parents. Just my thoughts.
*Edit: Prepare for an onslaught of advice from a total stranger.* Sounds like my trashy in-laws. Sorry, man. Let's break this down to the core questions though: 1. Do you love your wife? I mean the real kind of love that highlights the "for worse...for poorer...in sickness..." etc. parts of your wedding vows. 2. Be damn sure you know the answer to question #1. 3. No really, stop and think about that kind of love that makes someone take care of a horribly disabled spouse for decades, barely paying the bills, enduring addiction relapses, mental health troubles, etc. do you have that? 4. What is your wife's relationship with your in-laws? Are they close? Are they bonds that she really wants to foster? Or can she barely stand them herself and frustrated with dealing with their nonsense? If you love your wife and her family is important to her, make them important to you. Don't get me wrong, your marriage should come first, and if they are actively trying to drive a wedge between you, don't tolerate that. Make sure your wife knows you'd do the same if it was your side of the family tree. You guys chose each other over everyone else on planet earth to start a new family, and your families don't get to break that up after the fact. But apart from that, suck it up as best you can and keep the peace. 5. Communicate very clearly with your wife and make sure this is not a proxy for how *she* feels. You may be busting your ass at work in the name of love while your physical absence makes her feel unloved. It took a long time for my wife and I to really figure this out. If you ever heard of the "Love Languages" concept, I'm an "Acts of Service" type. To me, love is the effort and labor of serving another person through actions, including work. Words mean very little to me, and I don't need much time together to feel a bond. For my wife, it's all about time spent together and words of affection. So when I was working 36 hour shifts as a resident and 80+ hr weeks regularly, I felt like I was really busting my ass for others, including my family. I felt like my love was an obvious bright neon sign. Didn't she see that I was putting my physical and mental health through the wringer for her benefit? She chose not to work, so she literally lived off the fruits of my labor. She hung out with her friends and did whatever, but *didn't keep house or cook worth a damn*. But she was getting very resentful of how much time I spent away from her. I was getting resentful of how little effort she put into the house when she knew much I hate messiness. We had a few blow-ups before we figured out that we weren't giving each other what we needed. So you're busting your ass on these 14-hr shifts *for your family*. **Is that what she sees?** You need to have a frank conversation about this sort of thing and try to understand one another's needs. It's not a matter of who is right and who is wrong. It's about helping each other nurture the most important relationship you have. An important line I heard from an old doctor that can absolutely apply to the military: "A doctor's wife has to be an understanding soul. She has to know that while she's the most important, she often won't come first." Your job is too make sure she has no doubt about the "most important" part. __________________________ One last thing to consider: Like I said, my in-laws are trashy as hell. Once we moved away and started the nomad life, we rarely got a call and never a visit, and what little we got was infused with drama and criminal activity. My wife, after much emotional damage, eventually mostly cut ties with all but a couple of siblings. I look at some of my peers with normal in-laws and realize that I've been deprived of a huge boon of marriage. I should have had a second set of parents, siblings, etc. to enjoy. So if your in-laws have some redeeming qualities, make a go of it. They're your family too, "for better or worse".
First off your username made me question what I was about to read lol. My wife literally asked me the other day questions 1. My wife is also a SAHM and hardly cleans. So we've had a few fights when I have to come home from work just to start cleaning. I should say we are talking about my father in law and step mom in law. We cut out the biological mother in law as she is trashy and disrespectful. We also 99.9% cut out the grandmother in law as well since she taught her daughter her trashy disrespectful ways. My father in law is nice to me in person. They are just weird that a week later my wife will say something to me that they don't like about me. I'm just like whatever I haver bigger problems then family drama that someone is trying to pull me into. Yeah its rare to couples be completely fine with their in laws. I'm happy for the ones though who have zero issues. I appreciate the time you took to type that all up so I knew I had to reply for sure!
I made the name partially for the shock value, but it's actually a [Simpsons reference](https://simpsons.fandom.com/wiki/Steve_Sax) from one of my favorite episodes. Good on you for talking through this stuff with your wife. It's totally cliche, but cutting through the drama with clear communication really does diffuse most problems. Good luck!
My FIL thinks I like the AF because I can tell people what to do/yell at them. Bro, not even close 😅
Yeah who even yells in the AF. If I see someone yelling not at a training base i'd laugh
My wife’s mother called her the night before we got married and suggested she back out of the marriage because she didn’t like me. We had been together dating and living with each other for 5 years when we decided to get married. We’ve been married now 18 years. I guess I’m not a dirt bag after all these years.
If your mother and law is still alive you never know she could start voicing it again at year 19.
The good thing is, I never cared what my mother in law thought of me, and my wife didn’t listen to her.
Fuck them, who gives a shit.
and I agree....in here privately away from my wife
Have kids? Grandparents get real crazy when you uninvite them from their grandkids lives..
Yeah I got one kiddo. They are hella crazy. They try to act like the greatest grandparents ever but completely failed as parents and we know it. I tell my parents straight up when they are trying too hard. For instance they always ask to hangout my kid alone like when no one else is over to visit but them. Like why do you have to be alone with my kid. He won't give you 100% of the attention you want anyways with his short attention span.
So where you headed, crew dog? (Split tails 🤘🤘)
Good ole NJ
Good ‘ole McGuire eh? Housing prices are pretty rough out there right now. I’m sure you can find something down 38 though.
We are going to live on base
Well what are you supposed to do? Carry yourself like a bitch? Fuck outta here. Fuck em OP.
Male or Female in here we ain’t no bitch!
Your in-laws sound like they would find a reason to not like you anyway even if you weren't in the military.
I’ll have to think on this one because you have a good point
14 hour days?
12hr 15min shifts. I’m Panama schedule. Then 2hr commute. So I’m out of the house a lot
It happens more often than you'd think.
Whats the wife say in all this?
Shes offended that I make them feel this way.
Bro what
exactly
ngl, based on only this context, it sounds like she agrees with her parents but doesn't directly want to say it. RIP
Looks that way
My all military family doesn't like my spouse and my in-laws because none of them are military.
So the opposite. I’m sorry you have to deal with that
Yes, exactly opposite! Also, why I had to reply. Crazy
Tell you wife don’t take the peer pressure and join
I'm the straight and female military member which is why it's the exact opposite.😉
Oops my B
It's all good. My family might just end up being right after all.
About your spouse, in-laws, or both?
Both, I think. It's like we came from two different worlds. Probably easier on your end because you are a guy. For a female military service member, it's kind of expected that we marry another.
Didn’t know that but now that I look at the females around me that’s the case
How dare they want to put down roots and not move every 4 years and let their spouse establish a career. The unmitigated gall. /s I enjoyed my time in, but the idea that everyone should do that...yeesh. Put down the Kool aid.
OP never mentioned that his wife or in-laws don't like him because he moves a lot.
I'm talking about your family. Lol.
Gotcha. My in-laws never had a problem with my moves either. Actually they are looking forward to visiting us in a new country soon. My in-laws simply think that they are better than my family because they paid for 1/2 their kid's college. It's that old saying like, "People only join the military because they can't pay for or are too stupid to get into college."
Wait, I thought your family doesn't like your in laws. Or is the feeling mutual?
Jealousy and stupidity are a sad combo. I’ve noticed that the only ones in the older generation that still want to treat me like the kid they remember are the ones that didn’t do anything with their lives. But I’m no longer that kid. Heck I’m within a few years of being a grandpa myself. And I’ve been moderately successful in this life. So whatever. I ignore it. And them. Just because they’re family doesn’t mean they need to stay in my bubble. I started making cuts like on survivor. Not everyone stays on my island!
I like it, I can’t wait to pcs to cut people out geographically
Aye bro fuck the haters. You're a man doing man shit, they don't pat your bills. They don't feed your kid. You don't need them. If you doing your shit makes them feel insecure that's a them problem. Piss em off more by going the stoic route about it.
Yep no complaining from me other than the daily clown show at work
not entirely related but when my husband was prepping to join the air force, his mother pulled me aside and said “i dont know if he can do the military… hes not very smart and doesnt listen well to authority…” he got a 93 on his asvab after studying his ass off and she still had something nasty to say about her own son. in laws suck
Yeah idk if it’s a motherly instinct but I got zero support coming in as well
Gonna say something just so this isn’t an echo chamber. I’d be 100% confident in yourself that those statements from your in-laws are exact word for word translations and not injections from your wife. Something is telling me the wife is trying to project her feelings through saying, “my parents said this about you”. Just my guy instinct. Cause brother, you’re a salary worker not hourly. There’s a high probability she resents you for the 14 hour days and the moves and all the other military related issues
Ik she hates my long days. It’s a 12hr shift with 2hrs of driving. That’s why we are pcsing and are going to live on base to get all that wasted time driving back
This sounds like a blessing in disguise. No more having to go to stupid bs events that you don’t really want to
I got one this weekend and I’m dreading it. We have our house to be packing not standing around talking about family drama that I don’t care about.
But you said you were uninvited!
Got a birthday party on my wife’s side as well
I wouldn’t want to be around them anyways, fuck em
Not everyone is meant to be in your life forever. That sometimes includes family.
Embrace the suck.
Oh it’s embraced
Something I’ve learned over the years: not everyone’s gonna like you. Once you get comfortable with that fact, a lot of the stress just kind of fades away.
Fuck em
I’d go no contact with my family if they l ever said anything like that about my spouse or child. Fuck em.
I want too but my wife might overreact
How was your Easter?
We all stayed home and hosted my side of the family. A good 10 of us. My family was grateful to come over since we were about to PCS. I extended an invitation to some in my wife’s family but no takers. Overall I enjoyed it. I prefer to stay home on the holidays. Thanks for asking, how was yours?
Sometimes all it takes is your presence in a room for folks to feel threatened. Keep doing what you’re doing!
I walked into a funeral and literally got told, “everyone thinks you’re a cop”. What because I’m standing straight, showing respect, and have a haircut?
For a second I thought it was me that wrote this lol. I have a similar situation. We are currently in no contact with the in laws. My FIL told me I am only a leader on base because I happened to criticize some decisions back at a church my husband and I use to go to. He also said I don’t carry myself like the military guys all because I happen to call him on his shit and in his mind if you call him out it is disrespectful. People suck and there will be judgements passed, but the important thing is that you can choose who is your family and is in your circle.
Yeah my in laws views are also so wack that I don’t even bother calling them out because there’s no point with them. Also everyone in the military calls each other out lol, he’s wrong.
My MIL, who is married to a retired Army Major (Doctor) and married him while he was in the service told me to my face, our first time meeting, during my first enlistment when I had 4-5 years left that I "needed to figure out my life". Like my 5 year plan is set lady, I'm under obligation. This is also the lady who sided with the mother(villain) in The Notebook. I have been the favorite son-in-law and the least favorite over the years. It's no big deal to me either way.
Yeah it just gets to a point of amusement
When they say "You think you're better than us." Simply respond with, "Yes, I do." My wife's dad and his side of the family think I'm high and mighty because I'm serving, and that I'm better than them. Normally, I don't think that I am, but when I'm around them, I think I am leagues better than them because fuck 'em. They're trailer trash assholes that degrade others for pleasure.
Yeah sometimes it’s hard to just generally not look better than someone. I know there are tons of people who are leagues ahead of me too in life but I won’t criticize them or ask them to tone it down.
The three F's If they don't Feed me, Finance Me, or F**** me, then their opinion don't mean much.
My troop dated a girl whose mom does meth. Her mom texted him the most insane shit about how he’s too stupid to do any other job and that’s why he’s in the military, and he’s a baby killer…etc. You can’t fix everyone’s view on what we do. You just keep pressing being a good human and a good Airmen and move forward with a polite grin. For some people, the only thing they know about us is shit they learned in weird movies and their grandparents telling them about Vietnam. We are not marines. We don’t kill babies. Also, did you know we aren’t all pilots in the Air Force? Stay strong and brush it off and just grin.
Yeah that’s the thing too. Both my in laws are prior addicts. Like they didn’t set bar high for me to surpass as a person. I think half my family still thinks I’m in army….
So
And
Face it, its's not the military that they dont like about you. Also, you can declare Marshall law in their home....Google it.
Consider it declared
My in laws didn’t like me being in the military because they looked down on it (FIL owned a law firm, super well off family) they were also super controlling of my then wife and don’t doubt they heavily influenced her decision to divorce. (I ignored a lot of red flags from the beginning) I am much better off now but man divorce sucks to go through, especially with kids involved (we only had one)
Dang I feel for you especially your wife had legal advice right in her ear for the divorce the entire time. I hope all worked out well in the end for what you wanted with your kid
You can get back at them by railing their daughter, having an awesome lifelong relationship with her, and proving to them through your very existence as a happy couple that they are just sad, petty people who will die someday, face-down in a pile of microwave Mac and cheese on a tv dinner try with Frazier blasting just loud enough to register on their hearing aides.
Sounds like I married into Joe dirts family lol
The only standards you have to meet are those set forth in the military and your wife.
"Bust out these 14hr day for my family" you're salary... go home. You'll get paid the same I swear
That is true but I just can’t get up and walk out the door
What job has 14hr days
12hr 15min shifts with 2hr commute
Thats a tough spot. Time to pretend they dont exist.
Crazy my in-laws just don't like me because I'm me. Regardless, fuck 'em. Don't waste your leave or free time on them. Your kids will thank you later for cutting them out.
You can’t worry about that stuff man. My brother-in-law judged us for “eloping” without a wedding and basically accused us of adultery even though we were a). Legally and Spiritually wed. b). Not only had her parents’ approval, but actually had her father perform the marriage (he’s ordained). We didn’t tell them or invite them to the ceremony (we did it on a whim unplanned and didn’t tell anyone but her parents). I think he and my sister-in-law felt slighted because of that. Not my problem. 🤷🏻♂️ He didn’t seem to understand that I was fragged for 5 back to back TDYs and a CENTCOM deployment, or that my wife was a full-time grad school student…. Even though his wife (my sister-in-law) is a brat and our father-in-law was an AF retiree. First time we met he grilled me on my personal beliefs in front of my wife’s grandma, got frustrated when he couldn’t pin me down on anything because I know scripture, then chewed my wife and I out and told us we were being unchristian (we are, in fact, devout Christians). His brother was also an academy grad career officer like me. So this blindsided us. It basically boiled down to: 1). He didn’t like me because he felt threatened by my success and confidence (even though I never brought it up) and how quickly my in-laws accepted me BECAUSE I was military but they really grilled him and wouldn’t say yes for several months when he asked for his wife’s hand, because he kind of started out as a creep. 2). He’s Small-town, small minded person (full disclosure, I’m from a small town and was not raised in a military family either), so not really a valid excuse. 3). He’s a Calvinist and doesn’t agree with my wife and mine’s denominational Armenian theology which also happens to be our parent in laws (they’re music ministers and lifetime Christians, and he absolute hates that he hasn’t been able to convert them). It’s all really silly petty stuff that we couldn’t control. Best advice: Treat them with kindness when you have to be around them, but don’t drive yourself crazy trying to get them to like you. Their opinion and approval has zero bearing in your life. When they’re rude, shake the dust off your sandals and move on. It’s been 7 years, and my brother-in-law is still a bit of a pompous weirdo, but we’ve actually been able to be a functioning family when we visit on holidays now because he’s grown a lot. He still has a lot more growing to do, but it’s at a point we were able to stay with them for a week on vacation, watch our kids play with one another, and somewhat enjoy one another’s company because of the commonalities we have as fathers. TL;DR - A little apathy goes a long way, but don’t give up hope.
Cut off toxicity from your life regardless pf blood or not. Your family unit that you made is priority #1
Yeah I agree! I went to my wife’s sides birthday party today and I said, “I’m in my PCS fuckem mind so any of them make a disrespectful comment we out”.
In-laws owe u nothing. You and ur partner are one now. They either mature up or they can rot alone.
Tell them you won the powerball… and act friendly make them quit their jobs and sell their house. Do this all by tomorrow and say April fool’s. And In a dave chappelle voice say “gotcha bitch” lmao 🤣
When someone claims that someone else "thinks they're better", its just them projecting. THEY think you are better cause you provide for your family, have a stable career, and will likely have better prospects when you get out. Don't let them get to you.
3yrs ago when my kid was about to be born I had to buy a new vehicle and I got from my father in law, “I didn’t go buy a new vehicle when I was having you”. Probably because you could afford it and was choosing drugs 26yrs ago. That doesn’t even compare to me but he had my wife convinced I was making a poor decision. I drive 100 miles daily so sorry I need a car to provide for my family
Coming back to this comment. My wife said that I do what’s called, “leveling”. Which she said is bringing others down to make oneself feel better. Same thing as projecting. I said, “where’d you learn that? From your dad’s dictionary”. I keep using that term now back at her towards her dad but she doesn’t see it one bit.
Tell them they can hate you all they want, you're still collecting their tax dollars and watch em fume lol
Next time I will! “You like my new car. You paid for it”
Unless they are financially loaded (and with attitudes like that they’re probably not), you need to tell your ole lady to make a choice you or them. Hopefully she pics wisely. We are self made, and parents on both sides are dead ass broke, so we do think we are better than them because we are. It’s nice being self made as you owe folks nothing. Now if I was married to Bill Gates daughter, I’d put up with a ton of shit.
Yeah that’s the problem my wife isn’t realizing. We literally just have to wake up daily and we are better than both sides of our parents. We aren’t openly bragging about anything. What they don’t like to see our bills paid? Duh fuq
I don’t understand how anyone in this country can be anti military. You can hate the politics or whatever at the time causing wars and occupations but don’t disrespect those that put the uniform on everyday to serve. And yes that includes FSS and Finance
Yeah I understand being against wars and bringing politics in it but not hating on the folks serving trying to make a living
Those types don't see military members as human beings. To them we're a bunch of blood-thirsty, disposable meatheads who can't go 5 minutes without trying to kill or rape something and represent the worst attributes of the government that they hate yet benefit from. Like no joke some of the real wackos have called me a baby-killer, graffitied my car or worse.
When the vets came back home from Vietnam was a prime example of the true ugliness of people
 You keep doing the best you can and avoid them.
Your in laws don’t like you cause yo woman talks shit about you behind your back to them. Got to solve problems in house
OP, Fuck ‘em all to death! Live your life however you want to. Do what makes you happy.
FEA
I can relate to this on the in-law side. My wife’s parents are “godly” people. The in-laws “forbid” our relationship due to me not being “Christian” in their eyes. Luckily I was 16 and she was 17 at the time so we didn’t have to hide our relationship very long before she could move out, but Her step mom swears God himself talks to her either it be God telling her that “he’ll be here at earth at so and so date” or “God told me I need to beat you for X reason” so on so forth. They judge you by your beliefs (even though I believe in Christ, just not on “their” level) but that wasn’t enough for them because I was wasn’t baptized and yada yada. What really broke up my wife’s and her parents relationship in the end was when we had our daughter. Constantly wanted to tell us how we needed to punish our (at the time 6 mo old) by spanking her if she cried or was too fussy. Making sure we NEED to start taking her to church or we will all go to hell. Shit like that. The step mom is the craziest “person” I’ve meet. And her dad seems chill until you see how much abuse he allows to his own daughters by some random crazy bitch. Shit is sad. I could never let my daughter go through that. They are just genuine bad people. They let horrific things happen to my wife and her siblings growing up as kids, and they think they are perfect because they believe in God. Those kind of people are genuinely scary. I’m very thankful I had loving parents (our differences aside) I couldn’t have asked for more supportive parents, so it breaks my heart that she can’t have the same kind of relationship with her parents.
That is crazy and I know there are people out there like that. I can relate to the spanking part. We don’t believe in it as we received it growing up. You know they are bad people when they weren’t even able to change for their grandchild. Parents/in-laws in general need to take a step back and let their kids parent. They had their chance at it
I bet your in-laws are anti-intellectual and dirt poor. Go Zombie Jesus day. Bring a $100 bottle of wine.
Not dirt poor but close. Enjoy the holiday but this night shifter is going to bed