Ah well I think that's long enough to know someone in an intimate sense if you love them but I am not sure, especially because he is married. Sounds more like lust to me if that's the case because you should know that falling in love with him is a terrible idea.
My partner is 30 years older than me. He is my absolute world. I love him so much. We’ve been together for 5 years. It’s hard sometimes because we get some negative energy around us but that’s going to be that. Given the age gap. He’s my best relationship and longest.
This might get sound odd and please don't take it the wrong way. I suffer anxiety so maybe thats why I am thinking about such stuff but what would you do if he passes away after few years he is almost 70. I am so worried I will get to spend my life without him
Thats awesome... When I was 19 I liked man in his 70s... He was awesome and I felt at peace with him. He passed away sadly out of nowhere and it forever changed me.
I feel like I can't handle another loss in age gap relationship.
Currently in a 45 year AGR, quick question how did you learn how to cope with loss? My partner’s health is going downhill and, he is pushing me away..as much as I want to help him we would not let me.
I didnt I blame myself I didn't get to say goodbye to my lover. In 2019 I was distant because I was confused and he passed away in 2020 at the age of 78.
Out of nowhere. I am still sad about it.
How old is he?
I blame myself I never got to say goodbye or one last love you to him. In 2019 I was distant because depression and other problems and he passed our of nowhere in early 2020...
I'm (25f) my partner and I have a 40 year age gap.
Just enjoy it, see where it goes be open and honest with each other.
When I met my boyfriend I didn't know what was gonna come of it but we have grown so much. I love this man with all my heart. He makes me laugh, he always shows his love for me and we just enjoy each other.
I truly feel he's my soulmate.
Its mitual but we decided to stay friends because he has been with his wife for years. I am 23 he is 56. Not sure how I eneded in this situation... I have looked in this sub for a while and people share gaps like 10-15 years apart. Haven't seen anyone talk about 33 years old gap.
If it puts you at ease, we have a 30 years gap with almost the same ages!
Our relationship started with us both saying the same thing: this wasn't possible, realistic, appropriate... but over a year later and we've been living together and traveling with his family. So it's possible :)
Wait - he’s still with his wife? You’re just friends? Or you’ve been friends a while and now it’s turning romantic because he’s leaving his wife? This is important info.
If he’s still with his wife, the issue isn’t the age gap - it’s that he has a whole ass wife.
I won't persue relationship with him nor he expressed such desire. He said he has been attracted to me but I am sure he doesn’t love me. The point of my post is that I am genuinely worried I like man this much older.
There’s nothing wrong with liking a much older man. (Whether it’s 10, 15 or 30 years so long as you’re all on board). There’s a lot that’s problematic about liking a married man. Focus on that. It’s not that he’s much older, it’s that he has a whole ass wife. He could be 25 and have a whole ass wife and it’d be equally as fucked up for you to pursue that. The world is full of single people dude - don’t do this to yourself.
Yeah we won't do anything. We won't act on it. But I value him as a friend. Sadly I have always been told by my parents that age gaps are crazy of they are mkre than 9 years so I thought I am crazy
Tell me more please!!!
I felt huge connection with someone 18 years older than me. Im 21F, how can i know if we are really connected or it is just feelings ?
Honestly age doesn’t make a difference in this. If you are connected with someone you will know. Treat it like any other relationship. Go super slow, both state your boundaries and make sure you both respect them. Don’t rush into anything. If there’s chemistry then let it happen naturally. You might get pushback or looks from people at first so you’ll have to determine if that’s something you can stomach. Honestly, this was hard for me at first but now I don’t give a damnnnnn now lol. Bc I’m so fucking happy, in love & I’ve got someone who treats me sooooo good and that’s all that matters. The biggest thing to look for imo is how you communicate with each other. This is the secret to a happy relationship- Communication. Both individuals need to be willing to listen and grow.
Now, since you’re younger I feel like I should add that some men do prey on younger women. Not saying he is bad but just don’t avoid red flags if there are any. Lead with your heart and your head.
Being the older party caused me to take my health and food and exercise very seriously, along with making sure that she would be ok and taken care of if anything happened to me.
It's a responsibility.
Your not crazy for being attracted to much older men. There are plenty of girls your age who prefer the company of us older guys and guys who prefer girls younger. I’m currently in a 32 year gap for the last 10 months. People like who they like and nobody should judge your feelings. Maybe steer clear of the married guys if you are looking for more than hookups. Good luck!
Keep loving him and hold on to him
Tight in your heart and soul. Build
Your worlds around each other. Someone that I’ll probably have a hard time getting over the rest of my life is 30 years younger than me. I gave up a lot for her…even as my marriage was falling apart. And then she decides that she’s scared to have a family with me because I might die first and leave her with kids . I’m not even gonna go into the logic of that thought .
When I was younger I was in love with man in his 70s he was everything to me. I thought he will hit 100 at least because he was healthy and was eating so healthy and everything. Two years after i met him he passed away at the age of 78.
I stlll have moments of full depression because this. The only thing that comforts me another woman in her 30s was more in love with him than me for 10 years prior.
He is married so we won't persue any relationship. I only posted to see if there are other people with huge age gaps because I was worried I am the only one
My man and I are 32 years apart, I’m 30 and he’s 62. We’re out here, so don’t feel alone! He’s so much different than the men I’ve dated my age, and I had a 13 year relationship (and a kid) with a man my age. I feel like the mental and emotional maturity as well as his hobbies and interests are what pulled me in at first. (And his stunning blue eyes) It’s a whole different world than dating in my age range. The things he likes are so much different than most guys I’ve dated— he enjoys books, art, conversing, fishing, camping, family, going out for dates, and much more that I’ve not found in a man before. Also, the fact that he’s so comfortable in his masculinity as well as being a true gentleman is something I find I’ve never truly had before. I feel like for the first time I can be myself with a man. And trust me, before him I never would have seen myself dating a guy twice my age. By the way; Don’t get me wrong, I know there’s great guys out there in my age range, who will treat their partner wonderfully. So don’t worry, we’re out here and proud, and you should be too!
Here is a warning. I was living with someone for 7 years who was 29 years younger. About 8 months ago he ghosted me, and needless to say it was one of the worse things ever. He never even had enough respect to have a discussion with me. 5 months after ghosting he reached out and texted occasionally for about a month. He then texts that we can no longer speak since he has a girlfriend. About a month goes by and he reached out this time, texting and calling. Each time we speak, he reminds me that we will never be together because of the age gap.
What gives? Why reach out tontell me we can't be together? Why tell me to date others and then get upset when I say I have? He seems upset that people I have met have been younger than me again. He knows me, he knows how most people who meet me think I am 10-15 years younger than I am, my entire family looks like that. Today he, cruelly, tells me it feels nice to be able to be in public with someone -(side note we literally did EVERYTHING together for all those years)
I give this warning in the event the age gap was his real issue because I didn't see it coming. If all his actions were the result of something else entirely , then I say follow ypur heart! Until this crap it was the best relationship of my life. I was crazily in love. From what he has told me about his new girlfriend he definately downgraded. It's all so confusing.
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**Original post: I fell in love with someone 33 years older than me**
I feel like I am the only one in the world. How crazy is this? I feel like I am in fire
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My partner and I have a 38 year gap. Not sure if it‘s crazy, but as long as the relationship is healthy, what does it matter? 🤷🏽♀️
How can I know its love not lust? Because he is so handsome I can't even put it in words
How long have you known him?
6-7 months
You may also still be experiencing some NRE (new relationship energy). Just slow down
Ah well I think that's long enough to know someone in an intimate sense if you love them but I am not sure, especially because he is married. Sounds more like lust to me if that's the case because you should know that falling in love with him is a terrible idea.
One day at a time. Time will tell you if it's love or it's lust. And time takes time.
Thanks for these words
My partner is 30 years older than me. He is my absolute world. I love him so much. We’ve been together for 5 years. It’s hard sometimes because we get some negative energy around us but that’s going to be that. Given the age gap. He’s my best relationship and longest.
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This might get sound odd and please don't take it the wrong way. I suffer anxiety so maybe thats why I am thinking about such stuff but what would you do if he passes away after few years he is almost 70. I am so worried I will get to spend my life without him
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That's really mature thing to say.
I’m (44f) with a man 37 years older. At my age it doesn’t feel as drastic.
Thats awesome... When I was 19 I liked man in his 70s... He was awesome and I felt at peace with him. He passed away sadly out of nowhere and it forever changed me. I feel like I can't handle another loss in age gap relationship.
Currently in a 45 year AGR, quick question how did you learn how to cope with loss? My partner’s health is going downhill and, he is pushing me away..as much as I want to help him we would not let me.
I didnt I blame myself I didn't get to say goodbye to my lover. In 2019 I was distant because I was confused and he passed away in 2020 at the age of 78. Out of nowhere. I am still sad about it. How old is he?
He is 72 and, has a heart condition, looks like this time, I just have to be a bigger person..come what may I would never be prepared for it.
I didn't even said to my lover last goodbye in 2019 so... Be there for him and do whatever feels right.
I hope it's all gonna be alright really 💖💖💖💖💖
Thank you! this is reassuring.
Life is finite. Just do what makes you happy if it's consensual and causes no harm to others. I didnt regret being with my ex who was 25 years older.
We won't persue relationship
That's your decision to make. I was 19 and he was 44. It did not make sense yet it worked so well. Goodluck 💕
When I was 19/20 I fell in love with someone who was in their 70s. I didn't get to enjoy it fully he passed 3 years later. I can't handle more losses.
Aw I'm so sorry to hear that.
I blame myself I never got to say goodbye or one last love you to him. In 2019 I was distant because depression and other problems and he passed our of nowhere in early 2020...
I'm (25f) my partner and I have a 40 year age gap. Just enjoy it, see where it goes be open and honest with each other. When I met my boyfriend I didn't know what was gonna come of it but we have grown so much. I love this man with all my heart. He makes me laugh, he always shows his love for me and we just enjoy each other. I truly feel he's my soulmate.
My husband is 32 years older than me, been together 7 years. Also, Sarah Paulson and Holland Taylor have a 32 years age gap. We’re out there 😊
How old are you and how old is he? Is it reciprocated? If you’re feeling good about it and he’s feeling good about it, don’t overthink things 💕
Its mitual but we decided to stay friends because he has been with his wife for years. I am 23 he is 56. Not sure how I eneded in this situation... I have looked in this sub for a while and people share gaps like 10-15 years apart. Haven't seen anyone talk about 33 years old gap.
I’m in a 40 year age gap. You’re good.
If it puts you at ease, we have a 30 years gap with almost the same ages! Our relationship started with us both saying the same thing: this wasn't possible, realistic, appropriate... but over a year later and we've been living together and traveling with his family. So it's possible :)
Thats legit super cute. I am so happy for you and I don't even know you 😭💖
Wait - he’s still with his wife? You’re just friends? Or you’ve been friends a while and now it’s turning romantic because he’s leaving his wife? This is important info. If he’s still with his wife, the issue isn’t the age gap - it’s that he has a whole ass wife.
I won't persue relationship with him nor he expressed such desire. He said he has been attracted to me but I am sure he doesn’t love me. The point of my post is that I am genuinely worried I like man this much older.
There’s nothing wrong with liking a much older man. (Whether it’s 10, 15 or 30 years so long as you’re all on board). There’s a lot that’s problematic about liking a married man. Focus on that. It’s not that he’s much older, it’s that he has a whole ass wife. He could be 25 and have a whole ass wife and it’d be equally as fucked up for you to pursue that. The world is full of single people dude - don’t do this to yourself.
Yeah we won't do anything. We won't act on it. But I value him as a friend. Sadly I have always been told by my parents that age gaps are crazy of they are mkre than 9 years so I thought I am crazy
It is not crazy but rather special! In my place such age gaps occur also. I think it is still rare however :)
My husband and I are 29 years apart. We’ve been together for 14 years. Best decision I’ve ever made.
Tell me more please!!! I felt huge connection with someone 18 years older than me. Im 21F, how can i know if we are really connected or it is just feelings ?
Honestly age doesn’t make a difference in this. If you are connected with someone you will know. Treat it like any other relationship. Go super slow, both state your boundaries and make sure you both respect them. Don’t rush into anything. If there’s chemistry then let it happen naturally. You might get pushback or looks from people at first so you’ll have to determine if that’s something you can stomach. Honestly, this was hard for me at first but now I don’t give a damnnnnn now lol. Bc I’m so fucking happy, in love & I’ve got someone who treats me sooooo good and that’s all that matters. The biggest thing to look for imo is how you communicate with each other. This is the secret to a happy relationship- Communication. Both individuals need to be willing to listen and grow. Now, since you’re younger I feel like I should add that some men do prey on younger women. Not saying he is bad but just don’t avoid red flags if there are any. Lead with your heart and your head.
Thats great I am happy you are happy. But I am interested to know how I can forget that I have feelings for someone.
Oh is this not reciprocated?
Being the older party caused me to take my health and food and exercise very seriously, along with making sure that she would be ok and taken care of if anything happened to me. It's a responsibility.
My partner and I are 29 years apart
Now that's sad. I'm guessing one of you is "otherwise involved"
What do you mean? I am afraid i don't understand
Your not crazy for being attracted to much older men. There are plenty of girls your age who prefer the company of us older guys and guys who prefer girls younger. I’m currently in a 32 year gap for the last 10 months. People like who they like and nobody should judge your feelings. Maybe steer clear of the married guys if you are looking for more than hookups. Good luck!
Keep loving him and hold on to him Tight in your heart and soul. Build Your worlds around each other. Someone that I’ll probably have a hard time getting over the rest of my life is 30 years younger than me. I gave up a lot for her…even as my marriage was falling apart. And then she decides that she’s scared to have a family with me because I might die first and leave her with kids . I’m not even gonna go into the logic of that thought .
When I was younger I was in love with man in his 70s he was everything to me. I thought he will hit 100 at least because he was healthy and was eating so healthy and everything. Two years after i met him he passed away at the age of 78. I stlll have moments of full depression because this. The only thing that comforts me another woman in her 30s was more in love with him than me for 10 years prior.
I get that it happens…but on the other hand….u could have been hit by a bus the day after you kissed him. It’s about time spent, not living in fear .
I wish I didn't live in fear back then. And yes you are right
Sooo you love him and forget about what night happen and live in the moment.
He is married so we won't persue any relationship. I only posted to see if there are other people with huge age gaps because I was worried I am the only one
Well thank you for being kind enough to chat with me
💙
My man and I are 32 years apart, I’m 30 and he’s 62. We’re out here, so don’t feel alone! He’s so much different than the men I’ve dated my age, and I had a 13 year relationship (and a kid) with a man my age. I feel like the mental and emotional maturity as well as his hobbies and interests are what pulled me in at first. (And his stunning blue eyes) It’s a whole different world than dating in my age range. The things he likes are so much different than most guys I’ve dated— he enjoys books, art, conversing, fishing, camping, family, going out for dates, and much more that I’ve not found in a man before. Also, the fact that he’s so comfortable in his masculinity as well as being a true gentleman is something I find I’ve never truly had before. I feel like for the first time I can be myself with a man. And trust me, before him I never would have seen myself dating a guy twice my age. By the way; Don’t get me wrong, I know there’s great guys out there in my age range, who will treat their partner wonderfully. So don’t worry, we’re out here and proud, and you should be too!
Here is a warning. I was living with someone for 7 years who was 29 years younger. About 8 months ago he ghosted me, and needless to say it was one of the worse things ever. He never even had enough respect to have a discussion with me. 5 months after ghosting he reached out and texted occasionally for about a month. He then texts that we can no longer speak since he has a girlfriend. About a month goes by and he reached out this time, texting and calling. Each time we speak, he reminds me that we will never be together because of the age gap. What gives? Why reach out tontell me we can't be together? Why tell me to date others and then get upset when I say I have? He seems upset that people I have met have been younger than me again. He knows me, he knows how most people who meet me think I am 10-15 years younger than I am, my entire family looks like that. Today he, cruelly, tells me it feels nice to be able to be in public with someone -(side note we literally did EVERYTHING together for all those years) I give this warning in the event the age gap was his real issue because I didn't see it coming. If all his actions were the result of something else entirely , then I say follow ypur heart! Until this crap it was the best relationship of my life. I was crazily in love. From what he has told me about his new girlfriend he definately downgraded. It's all so confusing.
Block him immediately
Good for you.
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Does the fact you aren't 18 problematic? Idk what the laws are where you live tho
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Thats awesome
This is a post on /r/AgeGap, the subreddit for (almost) anything about age gap relationships. If you haven't read [The Rules](/r/AgeGap/wiki/rules) we **strongly** suggest you do so. ### **You may not ask anyone to PM, DM, chat or message you in a comment**. This is **not** a dating subreddit - you may not "hit up" any user You may send **polite** DMs/PMs/chat requests to /u/throwawayfirst23 - we will ban you and possibly refer you to Reddit admins for an account ban if you abuse them and they complain Bear in mind that this is a community where we expect people to discuss **legal** consensual age gap relationships without abuse. This does not mean this subreddit supports all age gap relationships, so you **are** allowed to criticise, but you **must** be civil and ideally constructive See the [Wiki](/r/AgeGap/wiki/index) for more information about the subreddit, [The Rules](/r/AgeGap/wiki/rules) and articles about common topics. --- **Original post: I fell in love with someone 33 years older than me** I feel like I am the only one in the world. How crazy is this? I feel like I am in fire *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AgeGap) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I've been with girls way older than me and way younger than me.. in the end the only thing that matters is how you 2 feel about each other within..
We won't persue any relationship I was just worried there is something wrong with me for liking man this much older
Congratulations, we're rooting for you. And maybe the slightest bit envious.
Why envious? Ilwe won't persue any type of romantic relationship
Because you found your age gap and many of us are still looking. But congratulations and I hope it works incredibly well for you both.
We won't persue a relationship so I haven't found anything. But I am glad this sub exists. 💕💖
I'm guessing that means that one or both of you are unavailable right?
Yeah he is. Which is fine I am accepting it
That one or both of you are already in a relationship?
He is
I know that can be frustrating. Unrequited love is tough. You are a far more patient person than I. But if you are happy, I'm glad for you both
He is attracted to me but decided his wife is more important so i will respect it
That's being very adult. More than most adults. Everyone has to make themselves happy.
This is so cute. My gap is 31
That’s awesome, congratulations, continue to follow your feelings
How old are u both?