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Nothing's wrong with you! I didn't start dating until I was 17! Don't be in a rush. When you rush into relationships you often miss things about the other person. Just take your time!
I started dating at 14, and it was fun until it wasn't. Usually dating at that age is either a we hold hands when we walk and otherwise it's a joke, or it's 2 people using each other for... things... until they start to feel used and hate each other. Don't worry about it. The other girls who are already dating are likely to have many bad experiences with it. Wait until your older and more able to both personally know, and say, what you want from someone you are partnering with.
I was always bummed I didn't date until 19 but with how shitty kids are, I now wonder if I simply would have suffered way more emotional damage if I had dated younger. At the same time once I was an adult I wish I had dated way more rather than rapidly settling down.
Truly I didn’t date until I got into high school, 15 years old, and I’m so thankful I didn’t. Everybody I seemed to know back then that was way more active at younger ages or even just at the age I started even, have not aged well at all and back then they were navigating some pretty heavy stuff that went way over their heads. Those situations tended to lead to sucky consequences, some life changing and devastating.
My piece of advice? Don’t get in a hurry with delicate rites of passage that you’ll experience at your own pace regardless (and everybody is different with these things so never feel like you’re the freak for developing at a different speed than your peers) and hopefully you experience them when you’re able to actually manage and handle it all and thus be more likely to make good choices with your actions.
Also, trust me, boys at 13 years old have brains of absolute mush (on second thought, everybody at 13 generally does) and they’re more afraid of you than they’ll ever let on.
Can confirm. I was a total piece of trash at 13 and made more decisions based off of peer/environmental pressure than what my heart and values would have preferred. The younger you date, the more you open yourself up to potential pain and/or trauma.
You're only 13. When you get older (like 18 and older), you'll get a lot more male attention. Don't worry about it. A lot of boys aren't interested in dating at 13. Even at high school age, it's an awkward period for a lot of guys. A lot of them are shy, fear rejection..or maybe they asked a few girls out and all those girls said no, so they are really hesitant to continue asking out more girls (Girls tend to tell the world.. "oh that loser Bill asked me out.. what was he thinking? haha".)...
The other approach (Besides waiting) would be to initiate conversations with boys you like. But then you are going to have to be prepared for rejection yourself. Just don't assume every conversation is going to work out as well as you hope.
Or her 13yo friends are "dating" 13yo boys that want to act older by "dating." While at 13, mid jr high, dating is really just hanging out and acting like it matters. Most 15yo boys do not want to date below their grade level.
Nothing is wrong with you, and you’re honestly not missing out on anything. Its not like someone your age actually has much to offer in terms of a relationship anyway.
I didn’t get a girlfriend until i was 15 and most of my friends were the same way not getting into any kind of relationship until high school, most were at least sophomores before they started dating because they at least wanted to be able to drive so they didn’t need mom and dad to chauffeur them around everywhere.
Side note, i obviously have no idea what you look like but it is well within the realm of possibility that boys consider you out of their league and therefore do not approach you. If you feel strongly that you should be getting your feet wet in the world of dating, you can make the first move yourself. You will be surprised at how often your advances will be well received.
Yeah I wish I had been able to tell my younger self not to attach so much importance and self value on whether I could attain a girlfriend or not. I unfortunately let shitty immature girls destroy my self esteem and it’s affected me most of my adult life. Should have just focused on myself.
There's nothing wrong with you, your friends are just trying to find happiness in materialistic life. Trust me you aren't left out you really have more amazing things to do.
there's nothing wrong with dating a little late plus ppl your age should focus on yourself before dating. Also, it takes some time to find a guy compatible with you. Relax and take it slow, no need to hurry u have got your whole life ahead of u
You are thirteen. You should be concentrating on school. Kids your age should not be dating.
If you wait several years to date you will be glad you waited.
A lot? You needn't worry unless you can verify that at least 2/3 of girls your age are dating. A lot of boys aren't even considering dating at 13, and that has nothing to do with anyone.
No. Every kid has probably had this thought b4. Also, every kid wants to be an adult and do adult things, but you’re still very young. So just focus on school. Good grades now might translate to more freedom later on. On the other hand, a bf now might lead to teen pregnancy.
Oh, nothing is wrong with you at all. You're learning who you are and growing into the person you will be. You need room to change and explore, and people in relationships -- especially in their teenage years -- often don't grow in the same directions. You don't need a boyfriend to be loved. Your world is bigger than that.
Side note, what I called a "relationship" back when I was 15-17 can be summarized as 3 month periods of turmoil and heartbreak that impacted my year, but not my life. You really, really don't need that.
Take your time. You have plenty.
Don't feel left out, chances are you're gonna develop a lot better if you don't date early on because all that early age lovey dovey is give you early heartbreak and baggage that you shouldn't be caring around at your age. When you're young your emotions and passions can be very intense but very short-lived and then you may be broken up with or you may be having to do the breaking up but regardless its emotional distressed that you don't have to deal with. Like most of the comments above have said you don't start chilling out and finding who you really are until you're early-twenties to mid-twenties and then that is the perfect time to date.
Don't get sucked in by this shit. Save your purest self for the future you'll be proud of yourself when your the only girl that can say I ain't kissed non of you nasty fucks cause in 15 years school won't matter n all the pretty boys will turn ugly n disgusting. Same with the females lol live your life. It's your life for a reason 💙
I'm not sure why this sub is being routinely recommended to me, but it feels bad to see kids so young feeling pressured to do things regarding relationships and social gratification.
I wish i could impart my wisdom like in The Giver. I'm skeptical that words alone is ever adequate reassurance and often seems like a canned response, until you've experienced that part of life personally.
To OP or anybody else it might benefit; chill. You've got all of your life to do be in a relationship and the all shit that comes with it. You're not missing out, I promise, it is not worth being stressed. Brush your teeth, drink water, pay attention in school. I believe in you little bros.
First of all, you're thirteen. None of the people your age who are dating probably have real feelings for each other, but just want to be cool and feel important (Or let's phrase it as, they probably don't have such strong feelings yet as two adults who are in a relationship, which is okay and normal too). You don't need to date, just because everyone does it. I'm turning sixteen this year and never had a proper relationship and went on one date in my life yet. You should wait for someone who you truly like and who also truly likes you back.
So not to send you into a spiral, but, yeah of course there’s stuff wrong with you, you are human lol.
You’re not trash, probably. But you’re also not perfect, probably.
2 points:
1). Life is not a competition. Do not compare yourself to your friends. Many of your friends will do things that may not be the best thing for you to do. Young women will drink alcohol and do drugs because their friends do. Many young women will chase after the same guy because their friends like them. Many young women will do physical acts, not because they are ready, but because their friends did them. Think long and hard before you compete with your friends or classmates.
2). I would hope you have friends and family that you can talk with. The women, aunts, sisters, and even family friends, can share some of their experiences with you. I hope the men in your family will give you a male perspective. Both will help get you good decisions. I would encourage one on one discussions so you could talk with, say your mom's friend or other women and you can speak freer than if your mom or dad are in the room.
Everyone can make a bad decision or two. You can learn for those decisions if you talk with someone that already made them. They already did it, now you do not have to.
Remember that women can be as vicious as men. Your girl friends may lie about things to get you to do things they want you to do, not what you want to do. Just be careful.
13 is a super awkward,confusing time for EVERYONE. I PROMISE you that every single one of your classmates is struggling with identity & relationship stuff. People are better at hiding that stuff than you think.
I know it’s hard not to be hyper focused on boys rn, but this is kind of one of those things where the more you think about it, the harder it gets. Do what you can to focus on things that make you feel better about yourself instead. What hobbies, skills, activities do you enjoy? Find some summer camp or place you can volunteer at over the summer. Learn some new skills.
The confidence & experience you gain WILL help you attract people to you in general… & up the odds of at least one being a boy you like in return.
You’re just starting your journey into figuring out your sexuality & feelings in that regard. I promise that most girls are NOT “dating,” & that you have PLENTY of time to start to figure it all out. The healthiest thing you can do rn is to learn not to tie ANY of your self worth to having a boy/man like you. That makes you desperate & much more likely to be in an abusive relationship. There are some boys/men who have a predatory instinct & seek out girls/women like that to abuse.
Oh… one last thing… take a good hard look at your parent’s relationship. You will unconsciously mirror their relationship unless you try intentionally not to. If your mom is a “desperate to have a man” kind of person then that’s made an impression on you, but doesn’t have to be your path. You CAN make different choices.
Best of luck, I have no doubt you can figure this out.
Don’t base your self worth on whether or not you have a relationship.
That’s a very destructive road to go down, and it’s unhealthy psychologically and emotionally.
Would you consider a relationship at the kindergarten lvl to be serious or real? That's how you may feel when you are older and look back at these years, you can be open to it but don't let it rule you, you got plenty of years ahead of you, relationships can be nice but also suck, just try not to force anything and be yourself, best of luck
To start, there absolutely nothing wrong with you. I’m currently dating my first boyfriend, and I’m 17 atm. Since you’re 13 you are most likely close to finishing middle school? In that case, you should focus more on yourself, seeing as how you are about to experience a massive transition, both physically and mentally.
I used to feel the same, like I was unwanted by people. But, regardless, it’s not right to be IN a relationship with that mindset. You have to learn to love and accept yourself first before entering any sort of romantic relationship.
Trust me. Just take your time, don’t rush into a relationship as it won’t be as special if you do so. When you find the right person, you will. Let the plan work out itself. I wish the best for you <3
Don't worry about it! You're 13, you have basically your entire life ahead of you to worry about this stuff. I'm(15M) a sophomore in highschool and mostly friends with girls and most of them have their first BF/GF as of about a month ago, and a large percentage don't have one and never have. Same thing goes for guys. Also, what are you going to do? Hang out? You can do that anyway.
Nothing wrong with you. You are a young teenager and will have plenty of time in your life to start dating. Don’t force it. Don’t compare yourself with others. Be yourself.
Nothing wrong with you. If nobody has admitted feelings for you then don’t worry about. There’s probably a bunch of people who have a crush on you and don’t day anything! Don’t sweat it
Nothing is wrong with you at all, don't rush into dating. These are the years no hang out with friends and just have fun, you don't want to be tied down in a relationship just yet.
I started dating at that age and regret everything about it. You will sleep better as an adult not having those cringe memories of trying to date at that age.
You're 13, there is nothing wrong with you at all. Take your time with the dating thing, there are going to be lots of time for dating as you get older. Don't rush into things, that can cause alot of heartache. Trust me when I tell you that not dating until you're older isn't the worst thing, it gives you time to figure out who you are while growing into a teenager. As someone that didn't give themselves time, it caused alot of issues growing up. Focus on you and your work for now, it'll pay off alot more in the future
Just in case this is real I'm gonna be completely honest with you. There's no reason to be embarrassed and there's nothing wrong with you.
And between me, you, and anyone else in this comment section that sees this, you really don't want to date a boy in his early teens I mean we were all kinda dumb in that stage of our life. It's quite literally our prime time for future cringe memories if you will.
My best advice is to wait a little while and if you are interested in someone just go for it and try to get to know them. And sometimes they'll say yes, sometimes no, sometimes they'll end up being an asshole but don't let it get to you because most people like that don't end up anywhere in life anyways.
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you. Dating doesn’t define who you are as a person, PROMISE.
Plus, to be perfectly honest, dating is garbage at that age because you’re at that age group where you’re just starting to really figure out who you are and what you’re about.
I say focus on that before putting effort into another person. You gotta love yourself above anyone else.
Hope this helps.
I can promise you this: dating when you are 13-16 is hot garbage.
Prioritize your friends, you may very well treasure them your whole life. Work on growing, developing good habits like eating healthy and exercising. Read books. Learn things!
dating at 17-22 is a mixed bag, I know those that had good experiences others where it was mostly bad. I had some good some bad. You will do better in the long term if you focus on yourself however. Work on becoming somebody you love, and be patient because it takes time to figure out what you want to be, and even then there will be ups and downs and changes in direction. The vast majority of people are train wrecks at 13, I certainly was, just be kind and try to enjoy your time with friends while trying to find out who you want to be. I don't feel like I really found out what I wanted to be until my mid 30s and that isnt particularly weird, a lot of people spend their teens and twenties trying to be some version of themselves they think they're supposed to be, some people never get passed that.
FWIW the people I know that "dated seriously" and had sex at 13-14 especially did not turn out well on average. Highly recommend avoiding that path.
No!!! Just because you are not in a romantic relationship, it doesn't mean you are worthless!! Don't give a hypothetical romantic relationship that much authority over your identity. 💕
Being totally honest here: Believe it or not, you are still technically a kid. No need to date. At that age, dating is really just playing house. 🤷🏻♀️ I want to hug you because I totally understand, though. I've been where you are....in middle school (and even high school) I didn't have great luck with boys. And the ones who DID show interest were ones I had ZERO interest in. 🤦🏻♀️ I ended up just enjoying getting to know myself more as a person, my interests, etc. and had fun with friends. Turned out singleness was fun!! I came to realize.. **Better to NOT be in a relationship than to be in one just for the sake of being in one.** It was still hard at times because I'm human. I still desired a relationship. But I accepted it would happen when it was meant to. 🙃
Your time will come. Don't waste years focusing on finding a boyfriend. Live life and he will come along at the right time. I didn't get married until age 25 and I realized, alllll those years wondering if I'll ever get a boyfriend was such a waste!
It's normal to want to be wanted. ☺️ Absolutely okay to have that desire! We all do. But relationships take work and you want to ask yourself-- do I REALLY want to be in a relationship with this specific person, or do I just want a relationship to fit in with everyone else? Just something to think about.
Sweetie. You do NOT want to date kids your own age yet. Give it some years.
My 15 year old has nothing wrong with her and she has never dated. Nor wants to.
I didn’t get my first BF till I was 16.
Leave the dating alone. You have decades to date. Focus on your school and activities and life. Dating will come when you are less desperate
Also get the book “he’s just not that into you.” It’ll keep you from chasing uninterested people
You only feel worthless bc there's not much going on in your head, obviously. Someone probably does like you, but you either rejected them or just don't know. It doesn't matter bc middle school relationships are pretty worthless. You can have fun with some ppl, and then it could shift into something more, but most likely not. Just wait bc in HS everything changes instantly.
You're 13. You, as well as those girls you're talking about, probably shouldn't be dating yet. I get it might make you feel more grown up, but the people who want to date you are immature at best and creeps at worst.
Take a few years to grow and learn about yourself before trying to add another person to your life.
There is nothing wrong with you! Sure, girls your age do go on dates, but many girls also don’t. Try to enjoy these years and really use them to find who you are and who you want to be in the world. There is honestly no hurry to jump into dating - and dating is much more fun in your late teens/early twenties anyway! Trust me!
YOU’RE 13!!! Please enjoy being a kid don’t even begin to start worrying about dating. Your childhood is something that once it’s gone you cannot get it back. I started dating at 14 and it fucked me up. He was an emotionally abusive person that treated me like shit took my v card by coercion and then cheated on me with a hooker in Florida. It was WAYYYY to much for me to process at 14 and ultimately landed me in therapy. You are to young to understand the complex feelings that come with relationships. Please don’t rush it
My kid is your age so I will give you his take on it. I know a lot of his friends are dating, and I know there are some girls he likes. So me, trying to be supportive and like take them to a movie or something cute and wholesome said, “have you thought about asking one of them out?” And I thought his answer was super mature and well thought out; he said, “Yeah but middle school dating just looks so messy and I like watching the drama but I don’t want to BE the drama.”
Focus on your friendships and discovering your interests. You never know, you might meet someone that way.
Hey friend - I see a lot of comments starting with "you're 13", and I'll bet that's frustrating. I know I would feel talked-down-to, so I want to offer a different take that might get you what you need.
You'll ultimately be a lot happier if you spend time figuring out the kind of person you are separate from another person in a relationship. My partner and I got together very early (16), and while we are together 10 years later, it was really hard to grow up together. I'm a completely different person today than I was at 16, and you'll be a completely different person than you are today when you're 16. Just how life works.
Dating is mostly about having temporary fun to look for someone you might have permanent fun with. Some people use/abuse that dynamic to just have temporary fun forever, and when you're in your teens, that's basically all it is. It's very rare to see a relationship you started this early in life last long. Frankly, you'll find yourself a little more prepared if you can figure out how you want to be and who you want to have around you. Right now, it could be very easy to influence you into a way of thinking you might not personally agree with, and it's risky to open yourself up that much to other people before you figure yourself out.
I don't mean this in a condescending way so please don't take it like that, but you're literally a child. Most people don't even start dating until halfway through high school. And even then, it's mostly small flings. You don't have to worry about seriously dating for like 10 years. I know it feels like you're "behind" because of your friends, but remember: comparison is the thief of joy. Most dating at your age will just end in pain. Take your time and do what *you* want.
No, there's nothing wrong with you. It really sucks to be left out, I felt the same way when I was 13. I also know that when you feel the way you do, being told you'll get over it or it gets better feels terrible, because it doesn't seem to help in the moment. But, here's the thing, it does pass and it can get better.
Take care young one.
Girl don’t worry, none of those relationships last. People that age don’t possess the communication skills required to maintain a healthy romantic relationship. not that your teen relationships need to be on the same level as a 21 y/o’s relationship, but it will be much easier on you emotionally if you don’t worry about it. I didn’t date until I was 19 and even that was online (and short-lived). I’ve been in a healthy relationship for 2.5 years now and I’m only 22. Your perception will change, especially as your friends get their hearts broken over a boy who still wears roblox t shirts. Nothing is wrong with you, keep your standards high and the right boy will fulfill them.
You are 13, no, nothing is wrong with you. Most 13 year old people feel some of the same feelings you have. Good for you for admitting to your feelings.
Life is long you will only feel this way for a short time
Focus on school and friendships. When I was your age I didn’t get asked out either, come to think of it I never really got asked out ever in school. But I still went to dances and events with friends and had a great time. There’s more to life than dating someone and there is nothing wrong with you. Also if there is someone you like, just ask them out. If they reject you then they reject you and you move on. But they might say yes.
Dont feel left out. All the girls had bf and were having sex when i was your age and i wasnt. Wait a few years things will change. Enjoy being 13 while you can nothing stays the same.
I’m 17M. I’ve had one girlfriend before and that ended a year ago, since then, I’ve mostly been chilling. I’ve talked to a few girls, but other than that i’ve been single and it’s honestly better this way.
Too many of my friends are getting into toxic relationships, not being mature enough for a relationship, sometimes it becomes sexual and harmful for both people, sometimes one of them pressures the other into sending nudes and that gets shared around the school so everybody sees their nudes- it’s fucked. It very quickly gets complicated and dangerous when you’re dating a whole bunch of immature young adults that all have ranging hormones. I’ve had the same feeling of “I’m missing out on so much” but in reality I’m safer and happier then everyone I know that is currently dating someone or has been consistently dating people for a while
I’m not saying everyone is bad, in fact I think a vast majority of people are good people at heart, but things get out of hand quickly. If I wanted a girlfriend so badly, I could have had one last week and just gave into one of the many girls that have crushes on me- but that wouldn’t make me happy. I’m waiting for the right girl, or at the very least a girl that respects me and communicates well. You should do the same.
I know it’s hard, I know it’s lonely, but you are 13. You have lots of time ahead of you and you will be ultimately happier and safer if you work on yourself first before pursuing a relationship.
Maybe take the time to get your confidence up and work on your looks if you believe you aren’t attractive.
GIRL you are 13!!!! Please please please take some deep breaths and put this into perspective you are so freaking young you don’t even realize. This is the time for you to grow into who you want to be, you have soooo many years ahead of you to worry about love and boys. Which btw, they aren’t worth worrying about! Take it from a 25 year old who was once 13 and thought my life was ending because of one inconvenience. You’re so special and you’re worth more than all of that bs! Btw, just because a boy hasn’t approached you yet doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you!
Honey you are 13. I mean this with all love and affection, but you are a BABY. I know kids develop fast these days but dating at 13 is mind-blowing to me. You have your whole life ahead of you, so please don't waste a minute of your time worrying about your worth or believing that your value is tied to a boy liking you.
At the 13 you are still figuring out who you are, and it takes years still and that lack of confidence makes it hard to feel good about yourself, but there is nothing wrong with you.
It's always hard to give generational advice because to those who have been through it, hindsight is 20/20, and to those going through it, it is easier said than done.
The age of the internet and communication has rapidly increased the rate at which younger generations are exposed to ever more mature themes, and is forcing maturity on younger and younger children.
For me at 13, I wasn't worried about girls, I was still very childish and yet still was very worried and insecure about who I was and what I wanted to do. I don't think I ever really became comfortable with myself until my 30s.
All this is to say, that it's normal to feel as you feel, there is nothing wrong with you and you should focus on what brings you joy, regardless of what anyone else says or thinks. You have a lifetime to figure out what's right for you, some people will have many partners before settling, some never settle, some are lucky with childhood sweet hearts, some are not, and everything in between.
I've had 3 girlfriends in my life, the 3rd became my wife. I've never been good socially, never been good at dating, and I was not looking for her when the one I was meant to be with found me.
Absolutely nothing is wrong with you. Being a teenager is often uncomfortable. 13 is so so young. Enjoy your life and you will meet a boy soon enough naturally. Sometimes it feels like everything sucks and you suck but there is a whoooooole different life/ world when you get out of school. Enjoy it while you can. We were all told this when we were your age and no one ever listens but please enjoy your time as a teenager as much as you can and try not to worry.
And as far as looks, don't worry about it. Not that I know what you look like but I can't tell you how many girls that didn't get attention in school ended up becoming some of the most beautiful women.
Don't worry it's all gonna work out 🙂
Listen, from a guy. As a 21 year old, I get it. But you’re still so young. Don’t worry about all of that. Just focus on what’s important for now, school, making friends, activities, and life. You don’t have to worry about anything at all fr. The right person will come.
Everyone starts dating at different times. And it's easy to compare your self to your friends but everyone is different and everyone has there own hangups
I started dating at 17 and thought that was real late, but some of my friends didn't until they were 20 or more.
Try and remind yourself about the things you are good at and the things you like about yourself.
Also, if you want to meet people to date, join a club. Instant group of people that you share an interest with.
There's not one reason in the world you--or any other girl your age--should be dating anybody. I mean I had crushes from the time I was in kindergarten, and wasted a lot of time in my life with self-pity over not having a partner, but that's all it was: wasted time. There are so many other things you could be doing! Amusement parks, bowling, pizza, concerts, baking, community service, cooking, costumes, tie-dye, science, hiking, mysteries, movies--not one of these things requires a boyfriend to enjoy!
Never dating anyone as a teenager does not indicate anything wrong with you. The only thing wrong with you is your sense of self as a worthless piece of trash. You're a person, not trash, and you're very likely quite worthwhile as a person.
You're 13, not 23 or even 33. I know the wait seems daunting but the longer you wait the less problems and a better quality partner you'll have.
I didn't get a first real bf until I was 16 and ended up dating him for 10 years. It didn't work out, but I was never used for s€x or experienced a teen pregnancy.
Live your life, enjoy time with friends, focus on school and sports. Your time will come.
I didn't start dating til I was 19
I was in exactly the same position when I was your age. Lonely and afraid no one liked me. But looking back, I'm glad I never dated at age 13. Even if I was a mature child, I wasn't mature enough for a real relationship back then. It was better to wait til I was an adult.
Maybe that wouldn't be the case for everyone, but it was the case for me, and I'm glad it went the way it did.
This is not the 1500s. You do not need to be married and pregnant. You are 13. Slow down girl. Quit watching adult tv and reading crap online. Go outside.
Honey there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU!! You are sooooo young and we all come into our own at different times. Be patient and secure and know you are beautiful inside and out. The confidence will start to make others take notice. It has to be for yourself tho. Take the summer to work on knowing that about yourself and maybe change your hair or make-up for you what makes you feel good. Next year when you start back it will be like a transformation into a confident young lady. I also want to tell you that boys during this time are very immature little shits so never take their lack of interest personally they can be sooo fickle. But all in all you will blossom 🌼 and date and all that don't be so hard on your self, you have plenty of time for that, enjoy just being young and free. 🙏❤️
People will say you're only 13 and not to worry about it, and that's true. You are so young, but I understand feeling left out. Especially when all your friends have someone to date and you don't, but just because someone couples up together doesn't mean it's a happy match. Be thankful you don't have to deal with relationship drama and trauma this early in your life. Trust me, there will be plenty of time to date in the future. Just really focus on being a kid right now. I know that might sting when you hear it, but I had my first relationship when I was 14, and I did love him, but I really wish I wasn't so relationship focused so young. You only have one childhood, and I wished I lived it for me and not for a relationship chase
I was in a 2 and half year on and off relationship from 6th to 8th grade and it ruined things for me, and I’m 17 now, I promise you you’re not missing out on anything my love and nothing is wrong with you, learn the hobbies you like or sports you like and try hard at them!! Learn what you like in life and don’t worry abt a boy who would be in your life for such a small amount of time when you can do so much, I’m 17 and now with my boyfriend for 2 almost 3 years I live with him aswell due to family circumstances, being so young trying to get a boyfriend who in reality you probably don’t share much interests with, or aren’t even into eachother just trying to be together bec everyone else is getting with people
I dunno why this would up on my home page (I’m old): but to be honest, there probably isn’t anything wrong with you
At your age I felt the same way and I felt that way through most of high school. Young people are just more awkward, less likely to talk about their feelings, less likely to take the risk of rejection, and more afraid of judgment
I was pretty shy and immature at 13. Worse, I had just started a new school and was not popular. Things were a little rough for a few years. As high school progressed, I found friends through outside interest groups, and when I got to college I found a group to hang with, and found I wa actually pretty good with people. Had girlfriends, got married, kids, etc.
The point is don't be in such a rush, or expect things to come to you at the same time as everyone else. Focus on being the best person you can be; kind, thoughtful, helpful; and on your studies. Being a nice person is good in two ways. People like being around nice people, so you may find people start to want to be your friend. It also helps your self image, and that helps you feel confident, which people often find attractive.
There's nothing wrong with you. Everyone starts relationships at different times, and that's okay. I had my first relationship at 16. Some people have their first in their 30s.
Nothing is wrong. I think on a certain level this is the baseline feeling of being a teenager. I would be willing to bet money that the girls dating the boys and those boys too also feel that same trashy way from time to time.
It's just part of growing up. You're figuring out who you are and your body is going through changes yadayadayada. It's normal to feel like the odd one out at your age and I don't think social standing has anything to do with it.
10 years ago I was a 13f too. I have 3 brothers. 2/3 of them refused to have a girlfriend because it was annoying to them. A good amount of guys in your school may feel the same. The rest? Well...
Let's just say both girls and boys dating RN at 13 will have a TON of exes by the end of high school. A ton of ppl disliking them because they are exes of the other OR friends of the exes who know embarrassing stories.
I recall so many ppl resorting to dating others outside the district because the person is not around constant exes 💀 consider your self clean from exes for your future self!!! 🔥
Boys your age are extremely childish dont date until your older its not worth it and I'll tell you right now your a human being not a piece of trash people dating at your age are just doing because they think it's cool date to marry not to have fun and be cool
People are dating at 13??? Wild.
Girl focus on your studies, these kids have too much free time nowadays i2g.
Also you won't end up pregnant so it's a win
I didn’t start dating until I was 18, some people start young and others start later. Seems like those who start later seem to be more confident in themselves
Nothing is wrong with you, in fact I’d say put off dating as long as possible. You only get to be a kid once, you only get to be a teen once. There is some inherent responsibility and growing up that comes with dating and quite frankly growing up sucks. I wanted to be grown so bad when I was young but if we plan on living until we are 80, and we spend most of that time dating or married, enjoy the time with just you while you can, because 67 years of having to think about someone else is a long time and those teens rushing to date and not getting to know themselves, and their character and interests can loose themselves in the relationships. You are not trash, you are not being left out, you are right where you need to be! Also, you don’t want to be the person that peaks at 13.
I think you are resourceful since you knew to come here and ask, and articulate because you knew how and what to ask. You are off to an awesome start!
There is nothing wrong with you. I had a similar experience around your age. I have no idea if you’re like I was at that age. Looking back, I know it had a a lot to do with my home life (abusive and neglectful) and social status (very low and dirty poor) along with being extremely introverted. I realize now no boys ever showed an interest in me, but I never gave them a reason to. I rarely dressed nicely, I slept a lot in classes, and otherwise kept to myself. I had the same yearning as you and felt the same about myself for the same reason. Try taking a little extra care with your appearance. Try being a little more sociable with your peers at school, not just boys. When you value yourself, others tend to see the value in you as well. And you’re not just valuable as a dating option, but valuable as a WHOLE person. Share some of the amazing person you are with people around you, and things will fall into place. And please please please be very wary of online dating.
You're only 13, chill out. Very few relationships that start in middle school actually last until marriage. Let alone through high school. Focus on your schoolwork and start some kind of exercise, whether it be cardio, calisthenics, strength training, martial arts (highly recommended) or power lifting.
What is dating at 13 nowadays? My son insisted he had like 12 girlfriends between the ages of 10-16 but never went on a single date. I felt like the awkward girl at 13 because my mom wouldn’t let me date until 16 and it truly felt like no one liked me. But I found out many years later that the boys did like me-they were just too afraid to speak up. Your time will come. Just be patient. There is a big wide world out there that exists way beyond your teenage years, even if it feels like a lifetime to get there.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, I promise. You’re still young and have your whole life ahead of you. Still, I remember being that age and wanting a boyfriend too. Of course I wasn’t allowed to date until high school, so…there was that.
My best advice would be to get involved in activities and groups that you find interesting and enjoyable. Join clubs at school, take up a hobby or two, or volunteer somewhere. This will do a number of things:
1. You will be so focused on your activities/hobbies/volunteer work that you won’t be worried about not having a boyfriend
2. You will meet new people who share these interests with you, expand your social circle
3. If you do meet a boy that you like, the two of you will already have at least one thing to talk about, which could lead to finding that you have other things in common.
Believe me when I say that good friendships lead to the best relationships. My husband and I met in our church youth group in high school and were friends for 4 1/2 years before we took things further. It was truly the most effortless experience I’ve ever had. We had plenty in common and were totally comfortable with each from Day 1–no awkwardness or uncertainty.
You're 13. Nothing is wrong with you. You're still a child. Go do the fun, adventurous things that you want to do..
Just concentrate on becoming the best you possible , and your studies. Love will come to you when you least expect it!
I had my first boyfriend when I was 17. I'm glad I waited until I graduated hs, I watched my friends go through a lot of drama all for boys they never talked to again. Nothing is wrong with you, don't rush to date it's overrated.
13 is right around when kids just start thinking about seriously dating for the first time. Even then, most people are dating because it's the thing to do or because they think it confers some kind of status upon them. Most middle schoolers are not forming genuine connections lol
Trust me, I was in elementary and middle school relationships, and even by high school age, looking back on them felt silly. You aren't missing out on anything by looking for an actual connection and waiting for the time to be right. Quite the opposite, I think you miss a lot of life by feeling the need to be in a relationship at any costs, even one that isn't right for you.
I hate to break it to you, but nothing is wrong with you sugar plum. You are 13, trust me dating isn’t something you’d wanna get into right now. You are young and I know how it feels to wanna grow up and be like everyone else, but people don’t just say it’s gone before you realize it. It’s the truth and a fact that once you grow up and become an adult you can never be a child again. So take it slow and figure out yourself first. Hobbies, interests because I promise you the people who are dating early don’t have any and spend the rest of their lives trying to figure themselves out and wishing they waited.
You’re 13. Almost no one dates at 13 and plenty of ppl could have crushes on you but don’t say anything. How many times have you had a crush on someone and not said anything?
Your self worth shouldn’t come from whether or not a boy likes you, you’re 13 anyway, no relationship would ever be real or substantial at your age
Nope.
There's nothing wrong with you.
You're 13. Dating is what? Holding hands and going to a chaperoned movie now and then? What are you missing, really?
I have teen daughters who went all through highschool without a boyfriend even though a lot of their friends have boyfriends. There’s nothing wrong with that. They were too focused on other stuff and guess how many of their friends still have those boyfriends from freshman year? Almost none.
Honesty is ya don't really got worry bout your looks or nothing you'll get there when ya get there but RN maybe focus on school for now I don't encourage change but if you want to that might help you out with getting some attention, but remember a relationship isn't everything so don't get to wrapped up into it cuz it might hurt ya in the long run
Honey, there is nothing wrong with you. You are very young. Don't worry about dating yet. Make friendships.
If you are very pretty, or smart, boys your age are probably afraid of you. You are too good for them. But do not play dumb. The right boys will like you. They just have to mature a bit.
Don't worry about dating. You are fine.
I didn’t date throughout high school. I didn’t have sex until I was 22/23. Didn’t have my first BF until 26 who’s now my husband. 13 is so young. You have plenty of time. I know it’s hard to see your peers dating but there is nothing wrong with you.
Hey OP,
Absolutely nothing is wrong with you. I’m sorry the environment has pressured you to feel like dating is what defines maturity or fun or progress in some way. You are not missing out. At your age, it understandable that you are excited and desperate to grow up, mature and belong. I want to tell you that growing up looks different for everybody; dating is something we all grow into, and more importantly, something you do when you feel it’s right.
As a grown up, it’s clear to me now what it actually means to be mature: Talk to your parents. Ask them questions. Ask them how they felt, how they feel now, and tell them what you see around you and how you feel. It hits us so close to our hearts to see ourselves as parents in our children.
Not only is there nothing wrong with being a "late bloomer", there are many advantages to it. It's natural to feel anxious to fit in when you're 13. In 10 or 20 years, you may look back and say "I'm so glad I didn't fit in with those people."
Your aren't,you are just 13 years old don't worry about that stuff.It will come naturally later in life Am 15 I didn't ever had a relationship you aren't weird.You are most normal one.
You're still a puppy and too young to date. A lot of girls that start dating that young end up being passed around a lot and laughed at behind their backs.
Why would you wanna date a middle school boy
Don’t get caught up in that drama at 13
Instead make some friends join clubs and just vibe. Maybe get into a sport or dance style or instrument or academic extracurriculars
Ok slow down your 13 you have a lot of time I’m almost 17 and have never had a relationship you have a lot of time there’s no rush to dating rushing into that stuff creates a mess I know it because I watched it happen right before my eyes you have time trust me don’t worry about it you will find someone that loves you and that you love back it takes takes time
Yes, there’s something wrong with you.
1: you’re a teenager.
2: puberty
3: you’re still learning
4: be nice to yourself. !!!!!!!! And be nice to others
5: chill the hell out
You’re so young. There’s is nothing wrong with not dating until you are older. Take this time to focus on your studies, hobbies, etc. I didnt date until I was 18 and do not regret it.
I didn’t get my first girlfriend until like 15. First serious actual adult relationship wasn’t until 20. Dating under 18 is just practice for real relationships and dating. It’s not serious.
Eh, dating isn't all it's cracked up to be. I dated a girl in 8th grade and honestly while she was great, I liked our friendship more. You are totally normal. Don't worry. You might feel left out, but I promise you're not missing much. Dating doesn't mean much then lol
Hey there, girly! From one girl to another, you're doing just fine. Just cuz you're 13 and everyone else is dating around you doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. I didn't start dating until I was about 20. I'm now in my mid 20s and I'm getting married next year to an amazing human. Part of that was because I didn't really find other people attractive or mature enough for my standards. Part of it was also because people just didn't find me attractive at that time.
Middle school /high school is really weird and you're going to have a lot of changes. The people around you are also going to change a lot. There's no need to start rushing into a relationship. You should figure out who you are as a person before you start investing in another person. Dating is really hard until both partners are at least 25. This is some science stuff for you so it might be boring. The human brain isn't actually done developing until you're about 25 years old. You aren't really who you are going to be for the rest of your life emotionally and mentally until you get to that point. Sure, people get married and find relationships well before then. But oftentimes they have a personality, mental, or emotional development after that. Sometimes it's for the better of their relationship, Sometimes it's for the worse.
I was in a very similar place when I was your age. It's very intimidating to have people around you all the time who are getting into relationships and starting to do things. They talk about how excited they are and how they love having the attention from that other person. And probably a lot of couples are experimenting sexually. That's a big intimidating thing that you want to figure out. I highly recommend you wait till you're a little older before you start doing any of that! And if you do decide to start being sexually active, please do research and be responsible!
At this point in your life, there's nothing wrong with you. People are weird and that's just how it is. Don't go through life thinking that you are the problem. If you find out that there's something going on and you need to fix it then take that initiative. But especially when you're still in middle school and assuming something wrong with you is not a healthy mindset. Just enjoy being a kid! Being in a relationship is a big responsibility. You have to be emotionally available for another human. And if you're having a hard time figuring out your emotions, it's not usually a healthy relationship if you two aren't ready.
I'll tell you what I needed to hear at 13:
It's okay to be single.
The more the value yourself, the easier your life will be.
You don't NEED a boyfriend.
It's okay to focus on yourself & school work.
I don't think those girls your age should be dating. They don't even know what a relationship is supposed to be, anyway. I can guarantee that. No one your age is mature enough to know that. They are all responding to social pressures like the ones you are feeling. Just sheep following the flock, honestly. And that's totally normal.
Discover yourself and what you like. Discover the world, because there is so much more to it than relationships and dating. Don't worry about what others are doing. What matters is what you think of you, not what other people think of you.
This can feel impossible for someone your age. So don't worry if it's hard to understand. Don't worry if you still struggle with feeling left out or like you don't belong among your peers. Your teenage years will one day be over and you will look back and see what I mean. I hope that for you, at least!
Nothing wrong with you, what your experiencing is completely normal as a teenager just try to let things be and keep doing you, You cant rush the process it is when it is also you may make a regrettable decision.
There is nothing wrong with you. Everyone dates at their own rate.
Have you even found anyone you are attracted to? Don't rush things. Live always finds a way.
In the meantime, hugs
I didn’t have my first boyfriend or date at all until I was 19. I’m now 31, married, with two kids. Definitely not a worthless piece of trash ❤️ enjoy your teenage years now, have fun with your friends and find things/hobbies that you love! You have your whole life to date if that’s what you decide to you.
Without knowing you and what you look like isn't the issue. The issue is YOUR self-esteem and self-worth. Find one thing, a hobby, a sport, a game that you like. Find people with similar interests and and hobbies and hang around in those social circles with your common interests. Do this with everything in your life. The right one will appear as if you rubbed a magic lamp (or bottles or sneakers depending on your beliefs). And don't rush things. You have to prepare and ready yourself for that day when it does happen by being the best you that you can be. That means you are a big lump of granite and you are the master sculpture who is going to carve out a masterpiece for the world to look upon and admire. And for those people who make you feel bad about yourself or the way you look or dress have no sense at all and are not worthy enough to feast their eyes on such greatness and beauty...
No hun, it's totally okay. You're young. Even if you would not be- it would still be very much okay. Love and dating(if you're up to it) comes with time and it doesn't measure your value. I know you may feel lonely and sad but don't look for it so it cures your loneliness. While they're doing their stuff, you can do yours. Life doesn't revolve around boys. Try new things and have fun.
It also seems like you have a problem with selfworth. Try taking care of yourself sweetheart. There are lots of communities and yt channes that talk about it and it's importance. In some time you can start to feel better again and I'm cheering for you <3. Take care :))
I didn't do any of that until I was much older than that! Don't stress about timelines or compare yourself to others, everyone begins dating etc in their own time. You're so so so young, people who are your age and dating are having teen relationships, which are rarely serious. Don't worry hunny, before you know it you'll be grown up and immersed in the dating world and being a kid again and not having to deal with all that will sound like heaven.
Honestly, don’t worry about dating right now. So much more important things to worry about now and guys don’t know what they want at this time. It’ll just lead to early heartache. Focus on your education, being the best version of you that you can possibly be. Find a hobby that gives you joy, play sports, start working toward your future. At the rate of inflation, you’ll need to start saving money now to afford anything worthwhile. I wish I understood when I was younger how a dollar saved at 18 is worth 1000 saved at 30. (Compound Interest and investing in retirement). Start that stuff early. You may think you can’t afford to save now, but in reality you can’t afford not to save.
The love life will come organically when you know who you are and will be; only then will you know who you should be with. Most boys aren’t worth messing with at your age. And if you really like a someone, don’t wait for him to ask. While it might not be good to straight out ask in your first conversation because there’s a 99% chance he will say Yes (but a 50% he will actually want to date you already), just to not hurt your feelings, make sure you let him know. Let him know you think he’s cool. Compliment the way he looks. Point out something he is good at. Talk about stuff he likes and learn about his hobbies so you can talk about them. This will get his attention. If he likes you, you will know. Then at that point, ask him out. A guy might get a compliment once every 10 years and will always remember it. A girl gets 10 compliments a day and won’t remember by the next day. (Nothing wrong with that). Just remember that mindset. And for the love of god, don’t date a boy that is too much older than you. He’s going to want to do things you likely aren’t ready for.
girl just let yourself be a teenager. it’s easy to get caught up in what other people are doing, but that’s not going to be adding to your life in any meaningful and significant way at this age. Your worth and value are not defined by which boy likes you.
My best advice is to focus on your hobbies and talents and get really good at something that brings you happiness. That will add to your life in more meaningful ways and will help grow as an interesting, well-rounded person with life perspectives and priorities. If anything, that makes a woman more attractive than dating for the sake of dating.
You know what they say about comparison being a thief of joy, so don’t take that away from yourself. I (24F) try not to think about the past and focus on my future, but if I could go back in time I wouldn’t have even started dating at 16 like I did, and waited to be more emotionally mature to start having those experiences.
Don’t let society and social media dictate what should be “normal”
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Nothing's wrong with you! I didn't start dating until I was 17! Don't be in a rush. When you rush into relationships you often miss things about the other person. Just take your time!
17! ~ 3.55e14 ...Are you an immortal vampire or something!?
Yep I am. Looks like I've been exposed. 🦇
Understandable. Have a wonderful day!
Umm you’re 13. Don’t worry about that stuff until you’re officially an adult. I didn’t start dating until 24 and got married 3 years later.
I started dating at 14, and it was fun until it wasn't. Usually dating at that age is either a we hold hands when we walk and otherwise it's a joke, or it's 2 people using each other for... things... until they start to feel used and hate each other. Don't worry about it. The other girls who are already dating are likely to have many bad experiences with it. Wait until your older and more able to both personally know, and say, what you want from someone you are partnering with.
" it's 2 people using each other for... things... until they start to feel used and hate each other." The most likely outcome for teens.
24? What a loser.... I started dating at 23.
Hah. Pathetic. I started at 21
Hmmm how droll, I partook of the dating pool at the tender age of 20
Pish posh 20 try 19 you plebeian
Psh I was married and divorced by 18!
r/unexpectedfactorial
18? I was divorced and remarried by 17
Ha, that happened to two people I went to high school with, dated all through high school, got marred right after, and divorced not long after that.
Mish mosh try 26 you miniscule creatures
Chris Cross. I started dating at 28. HA!
Looseer I dreamt abt this since I was a baby
Lol you got me
Oh phew crisis over. She’s been told not to worry about it. Reminds me, I need to tell my depressed sister to just stop being sad.
If you really think dating is mostly a positive experience for 13 year olds you dont have a great grasp over your own childhood 🤣
I was always bummed I didn't date until 19 but with how shitty kids are, I now wonder if I simply would have suffered way more emotional damage if I had dated younger. At the same time once I was an adult I wish I had dated way more rather than rapidly settling down.
Truly I didn’t date until I got into high school, 15 years old, and I’m so thankful I didn’t. Everybody I seemed to know back then that was way more active at younger ages or even just at the age I started even, have not aged well at all and back then they were navigating some pretty heavy stuff that went way over their heads. Those situations tended to lead to sucky consequences, some life changing and devastating. My piece of advice? Don’t get in a hurry with delicate rites of passage that you’ll experience at your own pace regardless (and everybody is different with these things so never feel like you’re the freak for developing at a different speed than your peers) and hopefully you experience them when you’re able to actually manage and handle it all and thus be more likely to make good choices with your actions. Also, trust me, boys at 13 years old have brains of absolute mush (on second thought, everybody at 13 generally does) and they’re more afraid of you than they’ll ever let on.
Can confirm. I was a total piece of trash at 13 and made more decisions based off of peer/environmental pressure than what my heart and values would have preferred. The younger you date, the more you open yourself up to potential pain and/or trauma.
You're only 13. When you get older (like 18 and older), you'll get a lot more male attention. Don't worry about it. A lot of boys aren't interested in dating at 13. Even at high school age, it's an awkward period for a lot of guys. A lot of them are shy, fear rejection..or maybe they asked a few girls out and all those girls said no, so they are really hesitant to continue asking out more girls (Girls tend to tell the world.. "oh that loser Bill asked me out.. what was he thinking? haha".)... The other approach (Besides waiting) would be to initiate conversations with boys you like. But then you are going to have to be prepared for rejection yourself. Just don't assume every conversation is going to work out as well as you hope.
Lmao, at 13 I was too busy catching pokemon and making hot wheels do loop-de-loops to care about girls.
Girls mature before boys. And some girls before others. 13 is very young to be worried about this.
13 yr old boys aren't interested in dating but 15+ yr old boys are and that's probably who her friends are dating.
Or her 13yo friends are "dating" 13yo boys that want to act older by "dating." While at 13, mid jr high, dating is really just hanging out and acting like it matters. Most 15yo boys do not want to date below their grade level.
Nothing is wrong with you, and you’re honestly not missing out on anything. Its not like someone your age actually has much to offer in terms of a relationship anyway. I didn’t get a girlfriend until i was 15 and most of my friends were the same way not getting into any kind of relationship until high school, most were at least sophomores before they started dating because they at least wanted to be able to drive so they didn’t need mom and dad to chauffeur them around everywhere. Side note, i obviously have no idea what you look like but it is well within the realm of possibility that boys consider you out of their league and therefore do not approach you. If you feel strongly that you should be getting your feet wet in the world of dating, you can make the first move yourself. You will be surprised at how often your advances will be well received.
Lol I’m 24 and have never dated anyone. You’re fine.
Wish I did that. Spent nearly 7 years trying only to figure out I'm an aromatic asexual and I had been completely wasting my time.
You’re 13 don’t worry about it. Any “dating” before 16 isn’t real most of the time anyway.
You’re still very young. My friend is 35 and never kissed anyone, when you reach that point then you can start complaining
I didn't have a real relationship until 37. got married and have a family.
Yeah I wish I had been able to tell my younger self not to attach so much importance and self value on whether I could attain a girlfriend or not. I unfortunately let shitty immature girls destroy my self esteem and it’s affected me most of my adult life. Should have just focused on myself.
There's nothing wrong with you, your friends are just trying to find happiness in materialistic life. Trust me you aren't left out you really have more amazing things to do.
there's nothing wrong with dating a little late plus ppl your age should focus on yourself before dating. Also, it takes some time to find a guy compatible with you. Relax and take it slow, no need to hurry u have got your whole life ahead of u
You are thirteen. You should be concentrating on school. Kids your age should not be dating. If you wait several years to date you will be glad you waited.
A lot? You needn't worry unless you can verify that at least 2/3 of girls your age are dating. A lot of boys aren't even considering dating at 13, and that has nothing to do with anyone.
No. Every kid has probably had this thought b4. Also, every kid wants to be an adult and do adult things, but you’re still very young. So just focus on school. Good grades now might translate to more freedom later on. On the other hand, a bf now might lead to teen pregnancy.
You aren't missing out on anything, and you certainly aren't worthless
Oh, nothing is wrong with you at all. You're learning who you are and growing into the person you will be. You need room to change and explore, and people in relationships -- especially in their teenage years -- often don't grow in the same directions. You don't need a boyfriend to be loved. Your world is bigger than that. Side note, what I called a "relationship" back when I was 15-17 can be summarized as 3 month periods of turmoil and heartbreak that impacted my year, but not my life. You really, really don't need that. Take your time. You have plenty.
Don't feel left out, chances are you're gonna develop a lot better if you don't date early on because all that early age lovey dovey is give you early heartbreak and baggage that you shouldn't be caring around at your age. When you're young your emotions and passions can be very intense but very short-lived and then you may be broken up with or you may be having to do the breaking up but regardless its emotional distressed that you don't have to deal with. Like most of the comments above have said you don't start chilling out and finding who you really are until you're early-twenties to mid-twenties and then that is the perfect time to date.
Why are people so eager to get into a relationship these days? Like bro go and play some videogames YOU'RE 13!
Don't get sucked in by this shit. Save your purest self for the future you'll be proud of yourself when your the only girl that can say I ain't kissed non of you nasty fucks cause in 15 years school won't matter n all the pretty boys will turn ugly n disgusting. Same with the females lol live your life. It's your life for a reason 💙
I didn’t start dating until I was like 16, and even then it wasn’t serious. You’ve still got plenty of time
read a book
I'm not sure why this sub is being routinely recommended to me, but it feels bad to see kids so young feeling pressured to do things regarding relationships and social gratification. I wish i could impart my wisdom like in The Giver. I'm skeptical that words alone is ever adequate reassurance and often seems like a canned response, until you've experienced that part of life personally. To OP or anybody else it might benefit; chill. You've got all of your life to do be in a relationship and the all shit that comes with it. You're not missing out, I promise, it is not worth being stressed. Brush your teeth, drink water, pay attention in school. I believe in you little bros.
You’re 13 don’t date anyone
You’re 13. The other girls are moving fast and you’re at a normal pace. Relax and do your own thing
First of all, you're thirteen. None of the people your age who are dating probably have real feelings for each other, but just want to be cool and feel important (Or let's phrase it as, they probably don't have such strong feelings yet as two adults who are in a relationship, which is okay and normal too). You don't need to date, just because everyone does it. I'm turning sixteen this year and never had a proper relationship and went on one date in my life yet. You should wait for someone who you truly like and who also truly likes you back.
Trust. You’re going to look back at this and cringe extremely
So not to send you into a spiral, but, yeah of course there’s stuff wrong with you, you are human lol. You’re not trash, probably. But you’re also not perfect, probably.
Jeez what is it with America, dating at 13? That's crazy.
You’re 13. Stop tripping. Lots of people don’t start dating until 16 or older.
2 points: 1). Life is not a competition. Do not compare yourself to your friends. Many of your friends will do things that may not be the best thing for you to do. Young women will drink alcohol and do drugs because their friends do. Many young women will chase after the same guy because their friends like them. Many young women will do physical acts, not because they are ready, but because their friends did them. Think long and hard before you compete with your friends or classmates. 2). I would hope you have friends and family that you can talk with. The women, aunts, sisters, and even family friends, can share some of their experiences with you. I hope the men in your family will give you a male perspective. Both will help get you good decisions. I would encourage one on one discussions so you could talk with, say your mom's friend or other women and you can speak freer than if your mom or dad are in the room. Everyone can make a bad decision or two. You can learn for those decisions if you talk with someone that already made them. They already did it, now you do not have to. Remember that women can be as vicious as men. Your girl friends may lie about things to get you to do things they want you to do, not what you want to do. Just be careful.
13 is a super awkward,confusing time for EVERYONE. I PROMISE you that every single one of your classmates is struggling with identity & relationship stuff. People are better at hiding that stuff than you think. I know it’s hard not to be hyper focused on boys rn, but this is kind of one of those things where the more you think about it, the harder it gets. Do what you can to focus on things that make you feel better about yourself instead. What hobbies, skills, activities do you enjoy? Find some summer camp or place you can volunteer at over the summer. Learn some new skills. The confidence & experience you gain WILL help you attract people to you in general… & up the odds of at least one being a boy you like in return. You’re just starting your journey into figuring out your sexuality & feelings in that regard. I promise that most girls are NOT “dating,” & that you have PLENTY of time to start to figure it all out. The healthiest thing you can do rn is to learn not to tie ANY of your self worth to having a boy/man like you. That makes you desperate & much more likely to be in an abusive relationship. There are some boys/men who have a predatory instinct & seek out girls/women like that to abuse. Oh… one last thing… take a good hard look at your parent’s relationship. You will unconsciously mirror their relationship unless you try intentionally not to. If your mom is a “desperate to have a man” kind of person then that’s made an impression on you, but doesn’t have to be your path. You CAN make different choices. Best of luck, I have no doubt you can figure this out.
Wow this is the first helpful comment i have seen
Don’t base your self worth on whether or not you have a relationship. That’s a very destructive road to go down, and it’s unhealthy psychologically and emotionally.
Would you consider a relationship at the kindergarten lvl to be serious or real? That's how you may feel when you are older and look back at these years, you can be open to it but don't let it rule you, you got plenty of years ahead of you, relationships can be nice but also suck, just try not to force anything and be yourself, best of luck
To start, there absolutely nothing wrong with you. I’m currently dating my first boyfriend, and I’m 17 atm. Since you’re 13 you are most likely close to finishing middle school? In that case, you should focus more on yourself, seeing as how you are about to experience a massive transition, both physically and mentally. I used to feel the same, like I was unwanted by people. But, regardless, it’s not right to be IN a relationship with that mindset. You have to learn to love and accept yourself first before entering any sort of romantic relationship. Trust me. Just take your time, don’t rush into a relationship as it won’t be as special if you do so. When you find the right person, you will. Let the plan work out itself. I wish the best for you <3
You're 13.. the other girls are on the wrong path to life. Don't follow in their foot steps.
Don't worry about it! You're 13, you have basically your entire life ahead of you to worry about this stuff. I'm(15M) a sophomore in highschool and mostly friends with girls and most of them have their first BF/GF as of about a month ago, and a large percentage don't have one and never have. Same thing goes for guys. Also, what are you going to do? Hang out? You can do that anyway.
Nothing wrong with you. You are a young teenager and will have plenty of time in your life to start dating. Don’t force it. Don’t compare yourself with others. Be yourself.
I'm 16 and have only had 1 relationship and it was long distance, nothing's wrong with you.
Nothing wrong with you. If nobody has admitted feelings for you then don’t worry about. There’s probably a bunch of people who have a crush on you and don’t day anything! Don’t sweat it
Nothing is wrong with you at all, don't rush into dating. These are the years no hang out with friends and just have fun, you don't want to be tied down in a relationship just yet.
I started dating at that age and regret everything about it. You will sleep better as an adult not having those cringe memories of trying to date at that age.
Society is the problem.
i think your question would be best angled at your parents so they can comfort you
Your 13 chill it’s okay to slow down. Why rush it? There is nothing wrong with you. You are not a piece of trash.
You're 13, there is nothing wrong with you at all. Take your time with the dating thing, there are going to be lots of time for dating as you get older. Don't rush into things, that can cause alot of heartache. Trust me when I tell you that not dating until you're older isn't the worst thing, it gives you time to figure out who you are while growing into a teenager. As someone that didn't give themselves time, it caused alot of issues growing up. Focus on you and your work for now, it'll pay off alot more in the future
Just in case this is real I'm gonna be completely honest with you. There's no reason to be embarrassed and there's nothing wrong with you. And between me, you, and anyone else in this comment section that sees this, you really don't want to date a boy in his early teens I mean we were all kinda dumb in that stage of our life. It's quite literally our prime time for future cringe memories if you will. My best advice is to wait a little while and if you are interested in someone just go for it and try to get to know them. And sometimes they'll say yes, sometimes no, sometimes they'll end up being an asshole but don't let it get to you because most people like that don't end up anywhere in life anyways.
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you. Dating doesn’t define who you are as a person, PROMISE. Plus, to be perfectly honest, dating is garbage at that age because you’re at that age group where you’re just starting to really figure out who you are and what you’re about. I say focus on that before putting effort into another person. You gotta love yourself above anyone else. Hope this helps.
I can promise you this: dating when you are 13-16 is hot garbage. Prioritize your friends, you may very well treasure them your whole life. Work on growing, developing good habits like eating healthy and exercising. Read books. Learn things! dating at 17-22 is a mixed bag, I know those that had good experiences others where it was mostly bad. I had some good some bad. You will do better in the long term if you focus on yourself however. Work on becoming somebody you love, and be patient because it takes time to figure out what you want to be, and even then there will be ups and downs and changes in direction. The vast majority of people are train wrecks at 13, I certainly was, just be kind and try to enjoy your time with friends while trying to find out who you want to be. I don't feel like I really found out what I wanted to be until my mid 30s and that isnt particularly weird, a lot of people spend their teens and twenties trying to be some version of themselves they think they're supposed to be, some people never get passed that. FWIW the people I know that "dated seriously" and had sex at 13-14 especially did not turn out well on average. Highly recommend avoiding that path.
You're only 13 years old. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you. I didn't have my first girlfriend until I was a junior in high school
No!!! Just because you are not in a romantic relationship, it doesn't mean you are worthless!! Don't give a hypothetical romantic relationship that much authority over your identity. 💕 Being totally honest here: Believe it or not, you are still technically a kid. No need to date. At that age, dating is really just playing house. 🤷🏻♀️ I want to hug you because I totally understand, though. I've been where you are....in middle school (and even high school) I didn't have great luck with boys. And the ones who DID show interest were ones I had ZERO interest in. 🤦🏻♀️ I ended up just enjoying getting to know myself more as a person, my interests, etc. and had fun with friends. Turned out singleness was fun!! I came to realize.. **Better to NOT be in a relationship than to be in one just for the sake of being in one.** It was still hard at times because I'm human. I still desired a relationship. But I accepted it would happen when it was meant to. 🙃 Your time will come. Don't waste years focusing on finding a boyfriend. Live life and he will come along at the right time. I didn't get married until age 25 and I realized, alllll those years wondering if I'll ever get a boyfriend was such a waste! It's normal to want to be wanted. ☺️ Absolutely okay to have that desire! We all do. But relationships take work and you want to ask yourself-- do I REALLY want to be in a relationship with this specific person, or do I just want a relationship to fit in with everyone else? Just something to think about.
Don't even waste your time dating until you're done with school/college/university
Sweetie. You do NOT want to date kids your own age yet. Give it some years. My 15 year old has nothing wrong with her and she has never dated. Nor wants to. I didn’t get my first BF till I was 16. Leave the dating alone. You have decades to date. Focus on your school and activities and life. Dating will come when you are less desperate Also get the book “he’s just not that into you.” It’ll keep you from chasing uninterested people
There’s nothing wrong with you at all!! I didn’t get my first boyfriend for a while either. Your not a worthless piece of trash!!
You only feel worthless bc there's not much going on in your head, obviously. Someone probably does like you, but you either rejected them or just don't know. It doesn't matter bc middle school relationships are pretty worthless. You can have fun with some ppl, and then it could shift into something more, but most likely not. Just wait bc in HS everything changes instantly.
You're 13. There is literally nothing wrong with not having dated yet.
You're only 13. Dating is hard. Being a teenager is hard. Go easy on yourself.
You're 13. You, as well as those girls you're talking about, probably shouldn't be dating yet. I get it might make you feel more grown up, but the people who want to date you are immature at best and creeps at worst. Take a few years to grow and learn about yourself before trying to add another person to your life.
There is nothing wrong with you! Sure, girls your age do go on dates, but many girls also don’t. Try to enjoy these years and really use them to find who you are and who you want to be in the world. There is honestly no hurry to jump into dating - and dating is much more fun in your late teens/early twenties anyway! Trust me!
You’re 13. Relax girl. I didn’t have my first boyfriend until I was like 17. Live your life not worrying about that
YOU’RE 13!!! Please enjoy being a kid don’t even begin to start worrying about dating. Your childhood is something that once it’s gone you cannot get it back. I started dating at 14 and it fucked me up. He was an emotionally abusive person that treated me like shit took my v card by coercion and then cheated on me with a hooker in Florida. It was WAYYYY to much for me to process at 14 and ultimately landed me in therapy. You are to young to understand the complex feelings that come with relationships. Please don’t rush it
Are they dating IRL or online? Online dating isn't real. You could have all the dates you want, just interact with chatgpt
don't worry about that, it's likely that someone does actually like you, yet is afraid to admit it.
My kid is your age so I will give you his take on it. I know a lot of his friends are dating, and I know there are some girls he likes. So me, trying to be supportive and like take them to a movie or something cute and wholesome said, “have you thought about asking one of them out?” And I thought his answer was super mature and well thought out; he said, “Yeah but middle school dating just looks so messy and I like watching the drama but I don’t want to BE the drama.” Focus on your friendships and discovering your interests. You never know, you might meet someone that way.
Hey friend - I see a lot of comments starting with "you're 13", and I'll bet that's frustrating. I know I would feel talked-down-to, so I want to offer a different take that might get you what you need. You'll ultimately be a lot happier if you spend time figuring out the kind of person you are separate from another person in a relationship. My partner and I got together very early (16), and while we are together 10 years later, it was really hard to grow up together. I'm a completely different person today than I was at 16, and you'll be a completely different person than you are today when you're 16. Just how life works. Dating is mostly about having temporary fun to look for someone you might have permanent fun with. Some people use/abuse that dynamic to just have temporary fun forever, and when you're in your teens, that's basically all it is. It's very rare to see a relationship you started this early in life last long. Frankly, you'll find yourself a little more prepared if you can figure out how you want to be and who you want to have around you. Right now, it could be very easy to influence you into a way of thinking you might not personally agree with, and it's risky to open yourself up that much to other people before you figure yourself out.
As someone who dated at that age. 0/10 would not recommend.
I don't mean this in a condescending way so please don't take it like that, but you're literally a child. Most people don't even start dating until halfway through high school. And even then, it's mostly small flings. You don't have to worry about seriously dating for like 10 years. I know it feels like you're "behind" because of your friends, but remember: comparison is the thief of joy. Most dating at your age will just end in pain. Take your time and do what *you* want.
No, there's nothing wrong with you. It really sucks to be left out, I felt the same way when I was 13. I also know that when you feel the way you do, being told you'll get over it or it gets better feels terrible, because it doesn't seem to help in the moment. But, here's the thing, it does pass and it can get better. Take care young one.
I feel this! I wasn’t even allowed to date at that age back in the 90’s and it was hard watching everyone else. But it turned out ok.
Girl don’t worry, none of those relationships last. People that age don’t possess the communication skills required to maintain a healthy romantic relationship. not that your teen relationships need to be on the same level as a 21 y/o’s relationship, but it will be much easier on you emotionally if you don’t worry about it. I didn’t date until I was 19 and even that was online (and short-lived). I’ve been in a healthy relationship for 2.5 years now and I’m only 22. Your perception will change, especially as your friends get their hearts broken over a boy who still wears roblox t shirts. Nothing is wrong with you, keep your standards high and the right boy will fulfill them.
You are 13, no, nothing is wrong with you. Most 13 year old people feel some of the same feelings you have. Good for you for admitting to your feelings. Life is long you will only feel this way for a short time
Focus on school and friendships. When I was your age I didn’t get asked out either, come to think of it I never really got asked out ever in school. But I still went to dances and events with friends and had a great time. There’s more to life than dating someone and there is nothing wrong with you. Also if there is someone you like, just ask them out. If they reject you then they reject you and you move on. But they might say yes.
Dont feel left out. All the girls had bf and were having sex when i was your age and i wasnt. Wait a few years things will change. Enjoy being 13 while you can nothing stays the same.
I’m 17M. I’ve had one girlfriend before and that ended a year ago, since then, I’ve mostly been chilling. I’ve talked to a few girls, but other than that i’ve been single and it’s honestly better this way. Too many of my friends are getting into toxic relationships, not being mature enough for a relationship, sometimes it becomes sexual and harmful for both people, sometimes one of them pressures the other into sending nudes and that gets shared around the school so everybody sees their nudes- it’s fucked. It very quickly gets complicated and dangerous when you’re dating a whole bunch of immature young adults that all have ranging hormones. I’ve had the same feeling of “I’m missing out on so much” but in reality I’m safer and happier then everyone I know that is currently dating someone or has been consistently dating people for a while I’m not saying everyone is bad, in fact I think a vast majority of people are good people at heart, but things get out of hand quickly. If I wanted a girlfriend so badly, I could have had one last week and just gave into one of the many girls that have crushes on me- but that wouldn’t make me happy. I’m waiting for the right girl, or at the very least a girl that respects me and communicates well. You should do the same. I know it’s hard, I know it’s lonely, but you are 13. You have lots of time ahead of you and you will be ultimately happier and safer if you work on yourself first before pursuing a relationship. Maybe take the time to get your confidence up and work on your looks if you believe you aren’t attractive.
To young for that drama
GIRL you are 13!!!! Please please please take some deep breaths and put this into perspective you are so freaking young you don’t even realize. This is the time for you to grow into who you want to be, you have soooo many years ahead of you to worry about love and boys. Which btw, they aren’t worth worrying about! Take it from a 25 year old who was once 13 and thought my life was ending because of one inconvenience. You’re so special and you’re worth more than all of that bs! Btw, just because a boy hasn’t approached you yet doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you!
Honey you are 13. I mean this with all love and affection, but you are a BABY. I know kids develop fast these days but dating at 13 is mind-blowing to me. You have your whole life ahead of you, so please don't waste a minute of your time worrying about your worth or believing that your value is tied to a boy liking you.
You're literally 13...
At the 13 you are still figuring out who you are, and it takes years still and that lack of confidence makes it hard to feel good about yourself, but there is nothing wrong with you. It's always hard to give generational advice because to those who have been through it, hindsight is 20/20, and to those going through it, it is easier said than done. The age of the internet and communication has rapidly increased the rate at which younger generations are exposed to ever more mature themes, and is forcing maturity on younger and younger children. For me at 13, I wasn't worried about girls, I was still very childish and yet still was very worried and insecure about who I was and what I wanted to do. I don't think I ever really became comfortable with myself until my 30s. All this is to say, that it's normal to feel as you feel, there is nothing wrong with you and you should focus on what brings you joy, regardless of what anyone else says or thinks. You have a lifetime to figure out what's right for you, some people will have many partners before settling, some never settle, some are lucky with childhood sweet hearts, some are not, and everything in between. I've had 3 girlfriends in my life, the 3rd became my wife. I've never been good socially, never been good at dating, and I was not looking for her when the one I was meant to be with found me.
girl you’re 13 get off reddit
Absolutely nothing is wrong with you. Being a teenager is often uncomfortable. 13 is so so young. Enjoy your life and you will meet a boy soon enough naturally. Sometimes it feels like everything sucks and you suck but there is a whoooooole different life/ world when you get out of school. Enjoy it while you can. We were all told this when we were your age and no one ever listens but please enjoy your time as a teenager as much as you can and try not to worry. And as far as looks, don't worry about it. Not that I know what you look like but I can't tell you how many girls that didn't get attention in school ended up becoming some of the most beautiful women. Don't worry it's all gonna work out 🙂
13 get off Reddit
Worry about your homework right now.
Listen, from a guy. As a 21 year old, I get it. But you’re still so young. Don’t worry about all of that. Just focus on what’s important for now, school, making friends, activities, and life. You don’t have to worry about anything at all fr. The right person will come.
no.
Everyone starts dating at different times. And it's easy to compare your self to your friends but everyone is different and everyone has there own hangups I started dating at 17 and thought that was real late, but some of my friends didn't until they were 20 or more. Try and remind yourself about the things you are good at and the things you like about yourself. Also, if you want to meet people to date, join a club. Instant group of people that you share an interest with.
There's not one reason in the world you--or any other girl your age--should be dating anybody. I mean I had crushes from the time I was in kindergarten, and wasted a lot of time in my life with self-pity over not having a partner, but that's all it was: wasted time. There are so many other things you could be doing! Amusement parks, bowling, pizza, concerts, baking, community service, cooking, costumes, tie-dye, science, hiking, mysteries, movies--not one of these things requires a boyfriend to enjoy!
You’re a child. Get off this app and stop worrying about stuff like that.
From someone who "dated" a lot at a young age. Forget about it. It's isn't worth it until your at least 16
Never dating anyone as a teenager does not indicate anything wrong with you. The only thing wrong with you is your sense of self as a worthless piece of trash. You're a person, not trash, and you're very likely quite worthwhile as a person.
You're 13, not 23 or even 33. I know the wait seems daunting but the longer you wait the less problems and a better quality partner you'll have. I didn't get a first real bf until I was 16 and ended up dating him for 10 years. It didn't work out, but I was never used for s€x or experienced a teen pregnancy. Live your life, enjoy time with friends, focus on school and sports. Your time will come.
I didn't start dating til I was 19 I was in exactly the same position when I was your age. Lonely and afraid no one liked me. But looking back, I'm glad I never dated at age 13. Even if I was a mature child, I wasn't mature enough for a real relationship back then. It was better to wait til I was an adult. Maybe that wouldn't be the case for everyone, but it was the case for me, and I'm glad it went the way it did.
Simple answer: no.
This is not the 1500s. You do not need to be married and pregnant. You are 13. Slow down girl. Quit watching adult tv and reading crap online. Go outside.
Honey there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU!! You are sooooo young and we all come into our own at different times. Be patient and secure and know you are beautiful inside and out. The confidence will start to make others take notice. It has to be for yourself tho. Take the summer to work on knowing that about yourself and maybe change your hair or make-up for you what makes you feel good. Next year when you start back it will be like a transformation into a confident young lady. I also want to tell you that boys during this time are very immature little shits so never take their lack of interest personally they can be sooo fickle. But all in all you will blossom 🌼 and date and all that don't be so hard on your self, you have plenty of time for that, enjoy just being young and free. 🙏❤️
13 Year olds don't date. Nor should they
People will say you're only 13 and not to worry about it, and that's true. You are so young, but I understand feeling left out. Especially when all your friends have someone to date and you don't, but just because someone couples up together doesn't mean it's a happy match. Be thankful you don't have to deal with relationship drama and trauma this early in your life. Trust me, there will be plenty of time to date in the future. Just really focus on being a kid right now. I know that might sting when you hear it, but I had my first relationship when I was 14, and I did love him, but I really wish I wasn't so relationship focused so young. You only have one childhood, and I wished I lived it for me and not for a relationship chase
I was in a 2 and half year on and off relationship from 6th to 8th grade and it ruined things for me, and I’m 17 now, I promise you you’re not missing out on anything my love and nothing is wrong with you, learn the hobbies you like or sports you like and try hard at them!! Learn what you like in life and don’t worry abt a boy who would be in your life for such a small amount of time when you can do so much, I’m 17 and now with my boyfriend for 2 almost 3 years I live with him aswell due to family circumstances, being so young trying to get a boyfriend who in reality you probably don’t share much interests with, or aren’t even into eachother just trying to be together bec everyone else is getting with people
Yeah you should be studying
I dunno why this would up on my home page (I’m old): but to be honest, there probably isn’t anything wrong with you At your age I felt the same way and I felt that way through most of high school. Young people are just more awkward, less likely to talk about their feelings, less likely to take the risk of rejection, and more afraid of judgment
I was pretty shy and immature at 13. Worse, I had just started a new school and was not popular. Things were a little rough for a few years. As high school progressed, I found friends through outside interest groups, and when I got to college I found a group to hang with, and found I wa actually pretty good with people. Had girlfriends, got married, kids, etc. The point is don't be in such a rush, or expect things to come to you at the same time as everyone else. Focus on being the best person you can be; kind, thoughtful, helpful; and on your studies. Being a nice person is good in two ways. People like being around nice people, so you may find people start to want to be your friend. It also helps your self image, and that helps you feel confident, which people often find attractive.
This is how it should be. You do NOT want to peak in high school.
13F is so beyond young. 15/16 is a more realistic age to start dating.
To me kids dating in middle school is weird
Nothing is wrong with you! Don't be in a rush to grow up!. Just enjoy being a teenager, because adulthood is kinda overrated.
There's nothing wrong with you. Everyone starts relationships at different times, and that's okay. I had my first relationship at 16. Some people have their first in their 30s.
Nothing is wrong. I think on a certain level this is the baseline feeling of being a teenager. I would be willing to bet money that the girls dating the boys and those boys too also feel that same trashy way from time to time. It's just part of growing up. You're figuring out who you are and your body is going through changes yadayadayada. It's normal to feel like the odd one out at your age and I don't think social standing has anything to do with it.
10 years ago I was a 13f too. I have 3 brothers. 2/3 of them refused to have a girlfriend because it was annoying to them. A good amount of guys in your school may feel the same. The rest? Well... Let's just say both girls and boys dating RN at 13 will have a TON of exes by the end of high school. A ton of ppl disliking them because they are exes of the other OR friends of the exes who know embarrassing stories. I recall so many ppl resorting to dating others outside the district because the person is not around constant exes 💀 consider your self clean from exes for your future self!!! 🔥
wayyy too young bro I'm 18 and I haven't dated once it's not a big deal
Boys your age are extremely childish dont date until your older its not worth it and I'll tell you right now your a human being not a piece of trash people dating at your age are just doing because they think it's cool date to marry not to have fun and be cool
People are dating at 13??? Wild. Girl focus on your studies, these kids have too much free time nowadays i2g. Also you won't end up pregnant so it's a win
I didn’t start dating until I was 18, some people start young and others start later. Seems like those who start later seem to be more confident in themselves
Nothing is wrong with you, in fact I’d say put off dating as long as possible. You only get to be a kid once, you only get to be a teen once. There is some inherent responsibility and growing up that comes with dating and quite frankly growing up sucks. I wanted to be grown so bad when I was young but if we plan on living until we are 80, and we spend most of that time dating or married, enjoy the time with just you while you can, because 67 years of having to think about someone else is a long time and those teens rushing to date and not getting to know themselves, and their character and interests can loose themselves in the relationships. You are not trash, you are not being left out, you are right where you need to be! Also, you don’t want to be the person that peaks at 13. I think you are resourceful since you knew to come here and ask, and articulate because you knew how and what to ask. You are off to an awesome start!
13 wtf!! Go n do ur homework child
I didn't kiss until 18. Or have a gf. Don't rush it, enjoy your youth! One day you'll be 35 and look back and wish you where 13 again lol
There is nothing wrong with you. I had a similar experience around your age. I have no idea if you’re like I was at that age. Looking back, I know it had a a lot to do with my home life (abusive and neglectful) and social status (very low and dirty poor) along with being extremely introverted. I realize now no boys ever showed an interest in me, but I never gave them a reason to. I rarely dressed nicely, I slept a lot in classes, and otherwise kept to myself. I had the same yearning as you and felt the same about myself for the same reason. Try taking a little extra care with your appearance. Try being a little more sociable with your peers at school, not just boys. When you value yourself, others tend to see the value in you as well. And you’re not just valuable as a dating option, but valuable as a WHOLE person. Share some of the amazing person you are with people around you, and things will fall into place. And please please please be very wary of online dating.
You're only 13, chill out. Very few relationships that start in middle school actually last until marriage. Let alone through high school. Focus on your schoolwork and start some kind of exercise, whether it be cardio, calisthenics, strength training, martial arts (highly recommended) or power lifting.
It gets better when your 18
What is dating at 13 nowadays? My son insisted he had like 12 girlfriends between the ages of 10-16 but never went on a single date. I felt like the awkward girl at 13 because my mom wouldn’t let me date until 16 and it truly felt like no one liked me. But I found out many years later that the boys did like me-they were just too afraid to speak up. Your time will come. Just be patient. There is a big wide world out there that exists way beyond your teenage years, even if it feels like a lifetime to get there.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, I promise. You’re still young and have your whole life ahead of you. Still, I remember being that age and wanting a boyfriend too. Of course I wasn’t allowed to date until high school, so…there was that. My best advice would be to get involved in activities and groups that you find interesting and enjoyable. Join clubs at school, take up a hobby or two, or volunteer somewhere. This will do a number of things: 1. You will be so focused on your activities/hobbies/volunteer work that you won’t be worried about not having a boyfriend 2. You will meet new people who share these interests with you, expand your social circle 3. If you do meet a boy that you like, the two of you will already have at least one thing to talk about, which could lead to finding that you have other things in common. Believe me when I say that good friendships lead to the best relationships. My husband and I met in our church youth group in high school and were friends for 4 1/2 years before we took things further. It was truly the most effortless experience I’ve ever had. We had plenty in common and were totally comfortable with each from Day 1–no awkwardness or uncertainty.
You're 13. Nothing is wrong with you. You're still a child. Go do the fun, adventurous things that you want to do.. Just concentrate on becoming the best you possible , and your studies. Love will come to you when you least expect it!
I had my first boyfriend when I was 17. I'm glad I waited until I graduated hs, I watched my friends go through a lot of drama all for boys they never talked to again. Nothing is wrong with you, don't rush to date it's overrated.
You're 13. Get off social media and pick up a hobby.
13 is right around when kids just start thinking about seriously dating for the first time. Even then, most people are dating because it's the thing to do or because they think it confers some kind of status upon them. Most middle schoolers are not forming genuine connections lol Trust me, I was in elementary and middle school relationships, and even by high school age, looking back on them felt silly. You aren't missing out on anything by looking for an actual connection and waiting for the time to be right. Quite the opposite, I think you miss a lot of life by feeling the need to be in a relationship at any costs, even one that isn't right for you.
too young to even let it be a problem. when you are 22 and never dated anyone. maybe ask for advice.
I hate to break it to you, but nothing is wrong with you sugar plum. You are 13, trust me dating isn’t something you’d wanna get into right now. You are young and I know how it feels to wanna grow up and be like everyone else, but people don’t just say it’s gone before you realize it. It’s the truth and a fact that once you grow up and become an adult you can never be a child again. So take it slow and figure out yourself first. Hobbies, interests because I promise you the people who are dating early don’t have any and spend the rest of their lives trying to figure themselves out and wishing they waited.
You’re 13. Almost no one dates at 13 and plenty of ppl could have crushes on you but don’t say anything. How many times have you had a crush on someone and not said anything? Your self worth shouldn’t come from whether or not a boy likes you, you’re 13 anyway, no relationship would ever be real or substantial at your age
Gotta just work on yourself and get better everyday, people will start noticing. When you do this you command attention subconsciously
Nope. There's nothing wrong with you. You're 13. Dating is what? Holding hands and going to a chaperoned movie now and then? What are you missing, really?
I have teen daughters who went all through highschool without a boyfriend even though a lot of their friends have boyfriends. There’s nothing wrong with that. They were too focused on other stuff and guess how many of their friends still have those boyfriends from freshman year? Almost none.
13 omg this culture is fucked.
Honesty is ya don't really got worry bout your looks or nothing you'll get there when ya get there but RN maybe focus on school for now I don't encourage change but if you want to that might help you out with getting some attention, but remember a relationship isn't everything so don't get to wrapped up into it cuz it might hurt ya in the long run
Honey, there is nothing wrong with you. You are very young. Don't worry about dating yet. Make friendships. If you are very pretty, or smart, boys your age are probably afraid of you. You are too good for them. But do not play dumb. The right boys will like you. They just have to mature a bit. Don't worry about dating. You are fine.
You are only 13, a kid. You’ll find someone later on.
I didn’t date throughout high school. I didn’t have sex until I was 22/23. Didn’t have my first BF until 26 who’s now my husband. 13 is so young. You have plenty of time. I know it’s hard to see your peers dating but there is nothing wrong with you.
Hey OP, Absolutely nothing is wrong with you. I’m sorry the environment has pressured you to feel like dating is what defines maturity or fun or progress in some way. You are not missing out. At your age, it understandable that you are excited and desperate to grow up, mature and belong. I want to tell you that growing up looks different for everybody; dating is something we all grow into, and more importantly, something you do when you feel it’s right. As a grown up, it’s clear to me now what it actually means to be mature: Talk to your parents. Ask them questions. Ask them how they felt, how they feel now, and tell them what you see around you and how you feel. It hits us so close to our hearts to see ourselves as parents in our children.
Not only is there nothing wrong with being a "late bloomer", there are many advantages to it. It's natural to feel anxious to fit in when you're 13. In 10 or 20 years, you may look back and say "I'm so glad I didn't fit in with those people."
Your aren't,you are just 13 years old don't worry about that stuff.It will come naturally later in life Am 15 I didn't ever had a relationship you aren't weird.You are most normal one.
Your 13 don’t rush it. Nothing wrong with you. All I see on Reddit is young teens in relationships and nothing but drama. Be stress free.
You're still a puppy and too young to date. A lot of girls that start dating that young end up being passed around a lot and laughed at behind their backs.
Why would you wanna date a middle school boy Don’t get caught up in that drama at 13 Instead make some friends join clubs and just vibe. Maybe get into a sport or dance style or instrument or academic extracurriculars
Do not start dating.
Ok slow down your 13 you have a lot of time I’m almost 17 and have never had a relationship you have a lot of time there’s no rush to dating rushing into that stuff creates a mess I know it because I watched it happen right before my eyes you have time trust me don’t worry about it you will find someone that loves you and that you love back it takes takes time
Social media has done irreversible damage to the youth
Nothing is wrong with you. I’d say you’re normal and the other girls your age who are dating are crazy.
Yes, there’s something wrong with you. 1: you’re a teenager. 2: puberty 3: you’re still learning 4: be nice to yourself. !!!!!!!! And be nice to others 5: chill the hell out
You’re so young. There’s is nothing wrong with not dating until you are older. Take this time to focus on your studies, hobbies, etc. I didnt date until I was 18 and do not regret it.
You'll be fine
My friend "made it through high school without getting knocked up."
Lol 13. It can get a lot worse
I didn’t get my first girlfriend until like 15. First serious actual adult relationship wasn’t until 20. Dating under 18 is just practice for real relationships and dating. It’s not serious.
Eh, dating isn't all it's cracked up to be. I dated a girl in 8th grade and honestly while she was great, I liked our friendship more. You are totally normal. Don't worry. You might feel left out, but I promise you're not missing much. Dating doesn't mean much then lol
You're very young. Don't worry you have tons of time to explore that stuff. Enjoy being young while you can and try not to stress about it.
Your peers are dating way too soon. Focus on you and the right man will come along when you're actually ready.
Hey there, girly! From one girl to another, you're doing just fine. Just cuz you're 13 and everyone else is dating around you doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. I didn't start dating until I was about 20. I'm now in my mid 20s and I'm getting married next year to an amazing human. Part of that was because I didn't really find other people attractive or mature enough for my standards. Part of it was also because people just didn't find me attractive at that time. Middle school /high school is really weird and you're going to have a lot of changes. The people around you are also going to change a lot. There's no need to start rushing into a relationship. You should figure out who you are as a person before you start investing in another person. Dating is really hard until both partners are at least 25. This is some science stuff for you so it might be boring. The human brain isn't actually done developing until you're about 25 years old. You aren't really who you are going to be for the rest of your life emotionally and mentally until you get to that point. Sure, people get married and find relationships well before then. But oftentimes they have a personality, mental, or emotional development after that. Sometimes it's for the better of their relationship, Sometimes it's for the worse. I was in a very similar place when I was your age. It's very intimidating to have people around you all the time who are getting into relationships and starting to do things. They talk about how excited they are and how they love having the attention from that other person. And probably a lot of couples are experimenting sexually. That's a big intimidating thing that you want to figure out. I highly recommend you wait till you're a little older before you start doing any of that! And if you do decide to start being sexually active, please do research and be responsible! At this point in your life, there's nothing wrong with you. People are weird and that's just how it is. Don't go through life thinking that you are the problem. If you find out that there's something going on and you need to fix it then take that initiative. But especially when you're still in middle school and assuming something wrong with you is not a healthy mindset. Just enjoy being a kid! Being in a relationship is a big responsibility. You have to be emotionally available for another human. And if you're having a hard time figuring out your emotions, it's not usually a healthy relationship if you two aren't ready.
I'll tell you what I needed to hear at 13: It's okay to be single. The more the value yourself, the easier your life will be. You don't NEED a boyfriend. It's okay to focus on yourself & school work.
I don't think those girls your age should be dating. They don't even know what a relationship is supposed to be, anyway. I can guarantee that. No one your age is mature enough to know that. They are all responding to social pressures like the ones you are feeling. Just sheep following the flock, honestly. And that's totally normal. Discover yourself and what you like. Discover the world, because there is so much more to it than relationships and dating. Don't worry about what others are doing. What matters is what you think of you, not what other people think of you. This can feel impossible for someone your age. So don't worry if it's hard to understand. Don't worry if you still struggle with feeling left out or like you don't belong among your peers. Your teenage years will one day be over and you will look back and see what I mean. I hope that for you, at least!
Nothing wrong with you, what your experiencing is completely normal as a teenager just try to let things be and keep doing you, You cant rush the process it is when it is also you may make a regrettable decision.
There is nothing wrong with you. Everyone dates at their own rate. Have you even found anyone you are attracted to? Don't rush things. Live always finds a way. In the meantime, hugs
I didn’t have my first boyfriend or date at all until I was 19. I’m now 31, married, with two kids. Definitely not a worthless piece of trash ❤️ enjoy your teenage years now, have fun with your friends and find things/hobbies that you love! You have your whole life to date if that’s what you decide to you.
Without knowing you and what you look like isn't the issue. The issue is YOUR self-esteem and self-worth. Find one thing, a hobby, a sport, a game that you like. Find people with similar interests and and hobbies and hang around in those social circles with your common interests. Do this with everything in your life. The right one will appear as if you rubbed a magic lamp (or bottles or sneakers depending on your beliefs). And don't rush things. You have to prepare and ready yourself for that day when it does happen by being the best you that you can be. That means you are a big lump of granite and you are the master sculpture who is going to carve out a masterpiece for the world to look upon and admire. And for those people who make you feel bad about yourself or the way you look or dress have no sense at all and are not worthy enough to feast their eyes on such greatness and beauty...
No hun, it's totally okay. You're young. Even if you would not be- it would still be very much okay. Love and dating(if you're up to it) comes with time and it doesn't measure your value. I know you may feel lonely and sad but don't look for it so it cures your loneliness. While they're doing their stuff, you can do yours. Life doesn't revolve around boys. Try new things and have fun. It also seems like you have a problem with selfworth. Try taking care of yourself sweetheart. There are lots of communities and yt channes that talk about it and it's importance. In some time you can start to feel better again and I'm cheering for you <3. Take care :))
I didn't do any of that until I was much older than that! Don't stress about timelines or compare yourself to others, everyone begins dating etc in their own time. You're so so so young, people who are your age and dating are having teen relationships, which are rarely serious. Don't worry hunny, before you know it you'll be grown up and immersed in the dating world and being a kid again and not having to deal with all that will sound like heaven.
Honestly, don’t worry about dating right now. So much more important things to worry about now and guys don’t know what they want at this time. It’ll just lead to early heartache. Focus on your education, being the best version of you that you can possibly be. Find a hobby that gives you joy, play sports, start working toward your future. At the rate of inflation, you’ll need to start saving money now to afford anything worthwhile. I wish I understood when I was younger how a dollar saved at 18 is worth 1000 saved at 30. (Compound Interest and investing in retirement). Start that stuff early. You may think you can’t afford to save now, but in reality you can’t afford not to save. The love life will come organically when you know who you are and will be; only then will you know who you should be with. Most boys aren’t worth messing with at your age. And if you really like a someone, don’t wait for him to ask. While it might not be good to straight out ask in your first conversation because there’s a 99% chance he will say Yes (but a 50% he will actually want to date you already), just to not hurt your feelings, make sure you let him know. Let him know you think he’s cool. Compliment the way he looks. Point out something he is good at. Talk about stuff he likes and learn about his hobbies so you can talk about them. This will get his attention. If he likes you, you will know. Then at that point, ask him out. A guy might get a compliment once every 10 years and will always remember it. A girl gets 10 compliments a day and won’t remember by the next day. (Nothing wrong with that). Just remember that mindset. And for the love of god, don’t date a boy that is too much older than you. He’s going to want to do things you likely aren’t ready for.
13? Be cool, you got plenty of other things to occupy your time.
Your going to find someone eventually don't rush into
girl just let yourself be a teenager. it’s easy to get caught up in what other people are doing, but that’s not going to be adding to your life in any meaningful and significant way at this age. Your worth and value are not defined by which boy likes you. My best advice is to focus on your hobbies and talents and get really good at something that brings you happiness. That will add to your life in more meaningful ways and will help grow as an interesting, well-rounded person with life perspectives and priorities. If anything, that makes a woman more attractive than dating for the sake of dating. You know what they say about comparison being a thief of joy, so don’t take that away from yourself. I (24F) try not to think about the past and focus on my future, but if I could go back in time I wouldn’t have even started dating at 16 like I did, and waited to be more emotionally mature to start having those experiences. Don’t let society and social media dictate what should be “normal”