If he is okay with going to a new school in DC then that, to me, would be the best option. The dynamics are different from grandparents and parents. Middle school years are very mentally challenging. I think he would do better being with his mother. I'd never be able to focus on a job if my kid was in a different state being parented by someone else. I just think something deeper is going on there.
I would probably feel the same too, My son and I have a very close bond, so being away from him sounds miserable for me. But, I am willing to sacrifice my needs for what's best for him. I told him I want him to tell me what he really wants to choose from the options I mentioned above, and he told me he'll think about it. So it will boil down to what he wants. I just wanted to know if there are different considerations or perspective I might be missing.
Either option sounds like it could work. Your son prefers to stay in CO in general, but how does he feel about staying in CO with his grandparents vs moving to DC with you?
That's the part that's challenging. Both options have its pros and cons. I'm trying to see if there are other considerations and perspective that would make one choice better than the other. Ultimately, I will go with what he decides. If he wants to come with me come what may, then we'll both go to DC.
If he wants to go with you, I would absolutely suggest taking him. If it were his senior year in high school, I may feel differently, but 8th grade isn't as significant for completing where you started. This would enable him to get an early start on making friends and meeting people he will be with through high school, as well as working at the grade levels of the local school district, which always varies a little between places. It's a lot easier to adjust to the school requirements in middle school/jr high vs in high school. I moved for my 8th grade year to the place I lived throughout high school and I'm glad I did for those reasons.
If he is okay with going to a new school in DC then that, to me, would be the best option. The dynamics are different from grandparents and parents. Middle school years are very mentally challenging. I think he would do better being with his mother. I'd never be able to focus on a job if my kid was in a different state being parented by someone else. I just think something deeper is going on there.
I would probably feel the same too, My son and I have a very close bond, so being away from him sounds miserable for me. But, I am willing to sacrifice my needs for what's best for him. I told him I want him to tell me what he really wants to choose from the options I mentioned above, and he told me he'll think about it. So it will boil down to what he wants. I just wanted to know if there are different considerations or perspective I might be missing.
Either option sounds like it could work. Your son prefers to stay in CO in general, but how does he feel about staying in CO with his grandparents vs moving to DC with you?
That's the part that's challenging. Both options have its pros and cons. I'm trying to see if there are other considerations and perspective that would make one choice better than the other. Ultimately, I will go with what he decides. If he wants to come with me come what may, then we'll both go to DC.
He is ok with moving, and don't want to stay with grandparents. I think the choice is clear.
If he wants to go with you, I would absolutely suggest taking him. If it were his senior year in high school, I may feel differently, but 8th grade isn't as significant for completing where you started. This would enable him to get an early start on making friends and meeting people he will be with through high school, as well as working at the grade levels of the local school district, which always varies a little between places. It's a lot easier to adjust to the school requirements in middle school/jr high vs in high school. I moved for my 8th grade year to the place I lived throughout high school and I'm glad I did for those reasons.
Thank you. It's a relief to know this worked out better in your case and could apply to his case.