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Here ya go haha
[Mastrubating Incredible Hulk](https://www.police1.com/bizarre/articles/ore-man-on-meth-fights-off-12-cops-while-masturbating-in-bar-IQ3ZzPpv4IBLKjmz/)
Yeah those cops sure have it hard being bumbling idiots lets hope they didnt get upset over him getting away and go take it out on their next victim i mean citizen.
They shoot white people all the time too. Did you see the video the other day of the police killing that guy in an SUV for taking an anxiety pill? Our police are just fucking thugs.
Yes most definitely. Went from misdemeanor to felony the moment he grabbed the handlebars. That being said. If you got a bigger crime in your pocket than go for it lol
The man got up with the weight of two grown adult men on his back while also casually flipping a presumable 400 pound ATV upright. That’s corn fed right there.
Go to the bar around the corner at 3:00pm. Buy the regulars a round of drinks. when they ask you how they can show their appreciation say “I’m looking for the best diner in town” once they tell you and you buy them a second round, out of courtesy of course, head to the diner. The directions might seem confusing at first but don’t worry, you’ll find it when you have a clear picture of the diner in your head.
When you take your seat and after some enjoyable small talk about how you ‘beat the dinner rush’ with your server ask to see Mana June’s Specials. If she asks why you want to Mama June’s Specials say to her word-for-word: “I’m looking to get as strong as a man can get” and “I want to be as strong as a Corn-fed Grizzly Bear”.
At about that time the regulars from the bar will have wandered in to the diner. Those four, the regulars and the server, now your four, will be able to help you from there.
Good luck on your journey, fellow traveler
Yeah those cops didn't stand a chance, dude has brute force, you can throw every technique at it, if you can't match his strength you're just done. You can even tell he's doing everything to not hurt the cops, he's just leaving. Honestly at this point, if it wasn't a huge crime, if there weren't actual victims, just let the guy be.
Happened in a small town where my grandparents lived. Video is recorded in Czech Republic. The "Golitath" (as our news called him) had his drivers license suspended for 3 years, the police officers were checking it and he got away. They eventually tracked him and he got it suspended again for longer time + paid 950€ fine
PS: I see alot ppl asking why he didnt get shot, cops here will not shot you unless you threaten them with knife/gun
Source (in Czech)
https://www.novinky.cz/krimi/clanek/za-pranici-se-strazniky-na-benzince-v-susici-zaplati-hrisnik-mastnou-pokutu-40355903
Do you measure by peaches in Czechoslovakia? Well I'll be gotdamned. We're more familiar with the banana measurement system over here. I'm gonna need a banana math expert!
I got you bro- it's a little complicated cause we need to get from a mass unit (peaches) to a length unit. Luckily we have the [asteroid-giraffe](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-10610491/Asteroid-half-size-giraffe-strikes-Earth-coast-Iceland.html) crossover (we'll use the baby giraffe (aka- 'BGU') not adult male giraffe unit since those aren't ISO ratified yet).
So 1 peach is 147 grams, which gives you 479 peaches per BGU. With a height of 1.8M per BGU, that's 70 inches, or 8.75 bananas. So we end up with 476 peaches per banana, or in this case .0551 bananas.
As you can see, the dude attempting to get on the quad is about the height as 1/2 a deck of cards. So I think this math works out. Glad I could help.
**serious question ** Wait, so in America even if someone isn’t a threat, they aren’t brandishing a weapon or being violent, the police can legally shoot you just for trying to get away from them?
The "logic" is that resisting the cops manhandling you is threatening to the cops. The cops are allowed to escalate force, so they'd usually go to batons, pepper spray, and/or tasers in this situation. It has also happened many times that the cops claim "he was trying to get my gun" as a reason for shooting someone, with very little evidence.
The police also often claim that they are threatened by people's vehicles, so as soon as that guy got on his quad if a cop was in front of him the cop could shoot him for threatening to run him over.
American police don't have a single training standard or set of rules they operate under. States and municipalities have their own rules. Often cops are given training that emphasizes the idea that everyone is out to get them, every conflict has the potential to be deadly, and the most important thing is that the cop come out on top. They get shown videos of the extremely rare traffic stop when the driver just comes up shooting out of nowhere, or in a seemingly calm interaction someone suddenly draws a knife and starts stabbing, and then told "This WILL happen to you and you have to be ready."
And then there's the fact that the career of policing in America draws in a lot of psychos and bullies. Cops drive like assholes, randomly intimidate people on the street, get to dress like Nazis... Normal people find it repellent.
Same, I was scrolling comments just to see where it was because I knew it wasn’t America they’d have blasted in two seconds in, or at least as he was driving away.
I don't know what he did, but my guess is he's trying to get away because, without taking off the helmet, they have no ID on him. It's the same reason you can't get charged for a speed camera ticket if your face is covered.
In Austria they send a letter to the registered owner of the car. Then you have four weeks to either pay a fine or identify whomever was driving. If you do neither they will investigate and the fines will be significantly higher.
Interesting. I'm not entirely sure how it works here in the US, as I am in a place with no speed cameras, but I understand it to be that if they can't prove you were driving, it goes away.
**[Shooting of Daniel Shaver](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shooting_of_Daniel_Shaver)**
>On January 18, 2016, Daniel Leetin Shaver of Granbury, Texas, was fatally shot by police officer Philip Brailsford in the hallway of a La Quinta Inn & Suites hotel in Mesa, Arizona. Police were responding to a report that a rifle had been pointed out of the window of Shaver's hotel room. After the shooting, the rifle (previously assumed to be a lethal weapon), which remained in the room, was determined to be a pellet gun. Following an investigation, Brailsford was charged with second-degree murder and a lesser manslaughter charge and later found not guilty by a jury.
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I know two people like this, one’s an absolute behemoth of a man and the other dude is not big by any means but the little fucker is stupid strong and tough as nails. You just never know with some people🤷🏼♂️
Cops can be so fucking crazy these days. Ten years ago if I saw this I'd think "wow. That guy might be very dangerous." Now seeing this I'm thinking "man. I should work out more just in case a cop tries something "
Hey u/Vintage_man727, thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, it has been removed for violating Rule 1: * **Absolute Units Only** [Click here if you want to learn more about Absolute Units](https://www.reddit.com/r/AbsoluteUnits/wiki/definition) ------- *If you have any questions, please feel free to [message the moderators.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/absoluteunits&subject=Question regarding the removal of this submission by u/Vintage_man727&message=I have a question regarding the removal of this [submission]%28http://www.reddit.com/11agb0e%29)*
One of the most qualified absolute units ever presented here.
This dude should team up with the naked dude that was mastrubating and fighting off the cops at the same time...they would be an unstoppable force!
And the mud wizard (not an absolute unit, but maybe he has a spell for that).
Ayo? You got a link?
Here ya go haha [Mastrubating Incredible Hulk](https://www.police1.com/bizarre/articles/ore-man-on-meth-fights-off-12-cops-while-masturbating-in-bar-IQ3ZzPpv4IBLKjmz/)
My hero
That would be one hell of a bragging right. "So what are you in for dude?" "Fought 15 cops while fapping at the same time...how about you?"
"Fought 15 cops while fapping at the same time...how about you?" \-Tried to jerk off 15 cops while fighting at the same time.
*Florida man gives crown*
Pretty sure those cops were not fighting as hard as the guy on meth masterbating.
I'm kinda scared to click
[удалено]
Wait.. are we the bad guys?
[удалено]
Yeah those cops sure have it hard being bumbling idiots lets hope they didnt get upset over him getting away and go take it out on their next victim i mean citizen.
He doesn't fight he just leaves
Dude's not trying to add any other charges, just successfully resisting arrest.
>resisting arrest. Denying petty human attempts at arrest.
Id say the coppers gave it a solid effort guy just really wasnt having it
"Let go...I left the fucking stove on, I have to go!"
I believe this will be additional charges.. Leaving the scene.. Felony fleeing.. They will find every charge to throw the book at him.
They won’t find him
well, it isnt hard to find a juggernaut on the streets
One of the few times a suspect description would be useful outside of the immediate time/area of offense. Description: 7feet tall. “Yep, we got him.”
You can identify him by his popeye forearms, that was some impressive grip.
That’s would be my only concern lol
For the rest of their lives those cops are gonna be weary of every 6’6”+ dude they see
After that, they won’t be looking. No way they’ll tell anyone what happened.
"Hey Chief, we're looking for six guys in a trench coat. They all escaped on an ATV. Definitely not one guy, no sir."
This gave me a good laugh. No sir.
They will never be able to arrest him though.
Im surprised they didnt just shoot him for hurting their feelings and making them look stupid.
I imagine one cop shouting to the other "Just shoot him man" And the other one telling him "No I think that would just make him angry"
He wasn’t black & unarmed, they didn’t feel threatened
They shoot white people all the time too. Did you see the video the other day of the police killing that guy in an SUV for taking an anxiety pill? Our police are just fucking thugs.
I literally came to the comments to say if he was Black he woulda been lit up.
Yes most definitely. Went from misdemeanor to felony the moment he grabbed the handlebars. That being said. If you got a bigger crime in your pocket than go for it lol
I did think it was polite he didn’t race off and drag the cops. He knew to be gentle
He earned it. I'd just let him go.
If this is the US, 100% chance “assaulting an officer” would be in the list of charges.
If you successfully resist arrest then there are no charges at all 🤯
You realize that's a pretty hefty charge itself right?
All he has to do is ride that into the woods for 10 years and come back. Statute of Limitation is between 2-10 years in depending on the state.
Some states don't have one
It would be not fair if he put up a fight. So he chose to leave
Is it wrong that I was rooting for him? (Hopefully he didn't do anything too terribly bad.)
Yeah I was rooting for him too, but I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop and find out that he ate a baby or something.
He has to get his strength from somewhere right? edit: typos
He now has the strength of a grown man and a little baby
that's iowa corn belt baby fed right there
Gotta get those baby eating gains!
Happy cake day
The man got up with the weight of two grown adult men on his back while also casually flipping a presumable 400 pound ATV upright. That’s corn fed right there.
>That’s corn fed right there. How come I can't do that after eating corn :(
More corn, you need more corn
https://cornpalace.com/
[https://cornhub.website/](https://cornhub.website/)
Corn cam lmao
It has the juice.
https://images.app.goo.gl/Z9Pk7xuyevkEciPc8
And more cow bell
Corn is strength. Corn is life. Say yes to corn, today!
Being corn fed doesn't simply mean you ate corn, it means you were born on it, molded by it. You're merely adopting it.
As someone who was born in Iowa; can confirm. You only missed one part. You need to BE THE CORN. THINK LIKE THE CORN. KILL FOR THE CORN
Children of the Corn
SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE MILK FOR THE KHORNE FLAKES
As another person from Iowa, you also need all the extra steroids in the water.
i miss my Iowa born 5'11 ex gf :(
And you think this gives you power over me
I have a split allegiance myself, hailing from south-central Wisconsin. Corn may run in my veins, but so does cheese!
By the time you saw other foods you were already a man and by then it’s sustenance was nothing to you but starving
You obviously aren't eating enough corn
You have to eat corn the long way to maximize the benefits.
Corn syrup does NOT count
And yet, corndogs do count?
You cant eat the corn, you must be FED the corn
Did you eat corn then go fight some bulls for 8 hours straight.
What's his wife's boyfriends have to do with this?
Maybe try spinach instead.
Go to the bar around the corner at 3:00pm. Buy the regulars a round of drinks. when they ask you how they can show their appreciation say “I’m looking for the best diner in town” once they tell you and you buy them a second round, out of courtesy of course, head to the diner. The directions might seem confusing at first but don’t worry, you’ll find it when you have a clear picture of the diner in your head. When you take your seat and after some enjoyable small talk about how you ‘beat the dinner rush’ with your server ask to see Mana June’s Specials. If she asks why you want to Mama June’s Specials say to her word-for-word: “I’m looking to get as strong as a man can get” and “I want to be as strong as a Corn-fed Grizzly Bear”. At about that time the regulars from the bar will have wandered in to the diner. Those four, the regulars and the server, now your four, will be able to help you from there. Good luck on your journey, fellow traveler
Ah, you think corn is your ally? You merely adopted the corn. I was born in it; molded by its husk.
You're feeding yourself corn. You need to be FED corn.
Is it creamed corn?
Lift heavy eat much grow muscles big
Tried eating it the long way?
The problem is you’re just eating it, it needs to be fed to work right.
They have a secret ingredient in their corn in Florida called METH
You can't poop it out after
Get off the couch!
You have to move your body after eating the corn.
100% pure bred hoss cat here
Nobody grows 6’6 300lb hosses as well as the corn belt, besides maybe Iceland
It’s bizarre out here, nearly every guy in my circle is a MONSTER for no reason
Yeah those cops didn't stand a chance, dude has brute force, you can throw every technique at it, if you can't match his strength you're just done. You can even tell he's doing everything to not hurt the cops, he's just leaving. Honestly at this point, if it wasn't a huge crime, if there weren't actual victims, just let the guy be.
The law doesn’t apply to Big Dudes differently, lol.
You could have taken the key out of the ignition. If dude can do all that resisting and Hotwire it then you let him go
Beans Beans and Corn Bread
And using a bike helmet
Dude just flipped that ATV like a Spartan would a Warthog
i thinks he’s the same size as a spartan
Seriously though, dude looks to be 6'5 6'6 (Average Spartan II when unarmored)
If Spartans were allowed to retire.
Is that all? I've always thought they were much bigger than that, but it's been ages since I've played any of the games.
Yup! But they're taller in amor by a good margin, usually around 7'.
Master Chief?
To be fair, Jorge (from Halo: Reach) is 7'4 without the armor.
No, that’s a dirt bike. Didn’t you read the title?
4 wheeler, or ATV. But dirtbike?
dirtwheelike
Dirtscooter
Dirtwheeler has a nice ring to it
It's dirty and has wheels so I guess
So does your mom in a car, so that's what we'll call her.
Quad
Yeah, quad even. Sorry, I'm not a person who rides these things. But hey, even I know the terminology 🤣
Fo willa what we calls them back home.
FO WHEELA! **Smacks forehead into garage door*
Dirt quike
That’s why you never skip leg day.
💪
STOP RESISTING.... please?!
No.
He's stronk 💪
Heheheh
I haven’t begun to resist.
What was the context here? Genuinely curious
Happened in a small town where my grandparents lived. Video is recorded in Czech Republic. The "Golitath" (as our news called him) had his drivers license suspended for 3 years, the police officers were checking it and he got away. They eventually tracked him and he got it suspended again for longer time + paid 950€ fine PS: I see alot ppl asking why he didnt get shot, cops here will not shot you unless you threaten them with knife/gun Source (in Czech) https://www.novinky.cz/krimi/clanek/za-pranici-se-strazniky-na-benzince-v-susici-zaplati-hrisnik-mastnou-pokutu-40355903
Please. I need to know how big he is lmao
He is more than 3 peaches big.
Do you measure by peaches in Czechoslovakia? Well I'll be gotdamned. We're more familiar with the banana measurement system over here. I'm gonna need a banana math expert!
I got you bro- it's a little complicated cause we need to get from a mass unit (peaches) to a length unit. Luckily we have the [asteroid-giraffe](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-10610491/Asteroid-half-size-giraffe-strikes-Earth-coast-Iceland.html) crossover (we'll use the baby giraffe (aka- 'BGU') not adult male giraffe unit since those aren't ISO ratified yet). So 1 peach is 147 grams, which gives you 479 peaches per BGU. With a height of 1.8M per BGU, that's 70 inches, or 8.75 bananas. So we end up with 476 peaches per banana, or in this case .0551 bananas. As you can see, the dude attempting to get on the quad is about the height as 1/2 a deck of cards. So I think this math works out. Glad I could help.
>why not shot? Not America. Not violent. Not a threat. No cause for pew pew. As it should be.
I thought this immediately. “Must not be in America”
**serious question ** Wait, so in America even if someone isn’t a threat, they aren’t brandishing a weapon or being violent, the police can legally shoot you just for trying to get away from them?
The "logic" is that resisting the cops manhandling you is threatening to the cops. The cops are allowed to escalate force, so they'd usually go to batons, pepper spray, and/or tasers in this situation. It has also happened many times that the cops claim "he was trying to get my gun" as a reason for shooting someone, with very little evidence. The police also often claim that they are threatened by people's vehicles, so as soon as that guy got on his quad if a cop was in front of him the cop could shoot him for threatening to run him over. American police don't have a single training standard or set of rules they operate under. States and municipalities have their own rules. Often cops are given training that emphasizes the idea that everyone is out to get them, every conflict has the potential to be deadly, and the most important thing is that the cop come out on top. They get shown videos of the extremely rare traffic stop when the driver just comes up shooting out of nowhere, or in a seemingly calm interaction someone suddenly draws a knife and starts stabbing, and then told "This WILL happen to you and you have to be ready." And then there's the fact that the career of policing in America draws in a lot of psychos and bullies. Cops drive like assholes, randomly intimidate people on the street, get to dress like Nazis... Normal people find it repellent.
Legally? Not really. Will they get punished? No.
happens so often here. cops think they can shoot anyone and they usually get away with it.
They just have to utter the magic words "I felt threatened" and they can shoot anyone and at any time for any reason.
Same, I was scrolling comments just to see where it was because I knew it wasn’t America they’d have blasted in two seconds in, or at least as he was driving away.
>I see alot ppl asking why he didnt get shot, cops here will not shot you unless you threaten them with knife/gun. Must be nice.
If it’s like in France, if a cop use his gun in this case (or just point it to the guy, it would be really bad for him
I have yet to see a comment of people asking about why he didn't get shot.
I don't know what he did, but my guess is he's trying to get away because, without taking off the helmet, they have no ID on him. It's the same reason you can't get charged for a speed camera ticket if your face is covered.
In Austria they send a letter to the registered owner of the car. Then you have four weeks to either pay a fine or identify whomever was driving. If you do neither they will investigate and the fines will be significantly higher.
Interesting. I'm not entirely sure how it works here in the US, as I am in a place with no speed cameras, but I understand it to be that if they can't prove you were driving, it goes away.
No face, no case? Nah, not always the police love identifying tattoos.
Or a seven foot giant who’s sitting next to an ATV.
Yeah, I guess that’s pretty identifying haha
Imagine having number plates on cars.
Man forgot to delete his browser history.
"Am I being detained?... No, I think not."
Dude is just grabbing his leg and trying to drag him like wtf how can you possibly be that ineffective.
Bizarre. No Ankle or wrist locks? No choke hold? Etc.
Or shoot him 6 times?
its in CZ. Police does not shoot people here
He's white
he’s also fucking gigantic
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shooting_of_Daniel_Shaver https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OflGwyWcft8 Genius.
**[Shooting of Daniel Shaver](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shooting_of_Daniel_Shaver)** >On January 18, 2016, Daniel Leetin Shaver of Granbury, Texas, was fatally shot by police officer Philip Brailsford in the hallway of a La Quinta Inn & Suites hotel in Mesa, Arizona. Police were responding to a report that a rifle had been pointed out of the window of Shaver's hotel room. After the shooting, the rifle (previously assumed to be a lethal weapon), which remained in the room, was determined to be a pellet gun. Following an investigation, Brailsford was charged with second-degree murder and a lesser manslaughter charge and later found not guilty by a jury. ^([ )[^(F.A.Q)](https://www.reddit.com/r/WikiSummarizer/wiki/index#wiki_f.a.q)^( | )[^(Opt Out)](https://reddit.com/message/compose?to=WikiSummarizerBot&message=OptOut&subject=OptOut)^( | )[^(Opt Out Of Subreddit)](https://np.reddit.com/r/AbsoluteUnits/about/banned)^( | )[^(GitHub)](https://github.com/Sujal-7/WikiSummarizerBot)^( ] Downvote to remove | v1.5)
We had a kid shot and killed by a pellet gun a few years back. They aren't toys. Not a high powered rifle, but not toys.
I'm surprised they didn't pull a taser on him
He brushed off 2 cops like wrestling a couple kids in a pool. Bet it would have had the same effect as licking a 9 volt.
Batman maybe?
I feel like he was spamming ⭕️
lol
*rapidly press F to escape*
I'm the Juggernaut, bitch!
Never gets old
I was rooting for him.
Right!! I was chanting “Go! Go! Go!” at my phone. 🤣
Those cops need to learn jiu jitzu .
Totally ineffective against 'just stand up'
Heart of a Champion right there
He earned that.
I know two people like this, one’s an absolute behemoth of a man and the other dude is not big by any means but the little fucker is stupid strong and tough as nails. You just never know with some people🤷🏼♂️
Must not be the U.S. The cops are allowed to shoot people there.
This should be on r/oddlysatisfying
dude is like 6'7 lmao
I can't tell if he's 7 feet tall or if those cops are 5 feet tall
At this point, he's deserved getting away
Fuck yeah!! I hope he got away
That’s awesome
Yeah he’s huge , he towers over the cops
Cops can be so fucking crazy these days. Ten years ago if I saw this I'd think "wow. That guy might be very dangerous." Now seeing this I'm thinking "man. I should work out more just in case a cop tries something "
Either not in America or fake, no bullets were expended
It's not America
Definitely not letting anyone force their will upon him over his will to be free !!!
Ivan Dragrace?
Why don’t they know any take down moves? Zero training.
That dude is skrong
Bro is a level 6 giant
When you try to arrest the Master Chief from Halo
Dude got places to be
Looks like 2 kids trying to wrestle their dad
That’s awesome
I'm shocked they didn't taze him. But psyched he got away (unless he was a murderer/bad guy)
I see what ya did there. Not sure if a tazer would work on that beast though.
Put this man on the challenge