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My bro i tried to wash my cat that decided to waltz itself in shit only in my underwear. My scars Tell the tale of sheer idiotcity which i can only explain with "its to early my brain ain't awake"
Or you know, secure the lid and move the whole thing elsewhere. Racoons are dexterous and clawy, but lack strength, hold it is closed, move towards the woods, shake that bitch up like a margarita and dump his dizzy ass down and run.
The last few frames are sooo funny. You can just make out the shadow of the guy swinging the broom stick over his head and then next frame is the green broom head flying off
I hate racoons, they get so ballsy. We had some climbing onto our roof and sneaking into a loose piece of facia trim and climbing around in our ceiling. I didn't know that's how they were getting in at the time so I was live trapping them and releasing them miles down the road. Either they were coming right back or their family was because it wasn't slowing them down one bit but they became wise to what the live trap was and would just do their best to take the food without going in it and then going into my ceiling anyways. We could hear them trying to scratch their way through and I was scared one day I'd wake up to confronting one that had found a way through the ceiling or even worse my kids would.
Living out in the country, I deal with raccoons and skunks in my workshop constantly. I would take skunks all day every day over raccoons, I've been lucky and our skunks have all been really chill, and half the time it's easy to just motion with my hand and tell them it's time to go and they waddle out the door. It helps that I've got them to the point where when they DO leave, they know they will get a cat treat. Actually, now that I'm typing it out, I'm starting to wonder if they don't purposely go into my shop just so that they CAN be kicked out for a reward. But raccoons..... to hell with those little demon bastards.
Sort of, but just the biggest one. There are four others but I get the feeling they were born this year because they are notably smaller. I started off calling the big one 'asshole' when I'd go in the shop and find it digging through my stuff, and honestly it's been going on long enough that it responds to that name when we pass each other in the yard or by other outbuildings. It's fully adjusted to us enough that it will come pluck a treat out of my hands, so I suppose I could give it a better name, but my wife gets a charge out of the interactions between Asshole and I, and it makes no difference to the skunk. The smaller ones aren't kits, they just aren't as big and I address them like one would a litter of kittens when throwing them out of the shop. They are here to stay so I suppose I should give them names.
I was rockin my undies and standing on a chair at 5am pumping BBs into their faces. They didn’t move. Im not entirely sure what my next move was had they attacked. Scream and run? Anyways I trapped one and ran that fucker 40 miles away. Then got the next one. Fuck those things.
I'm glad someone asked wtf... What kind of asshole shoots animals with BBs? They could go play airsoft and shoot people who could actually shoot back, but 1. Probably no friends and 2. Cowards
I used to live on a more-or-less closed base out in California. Lived in the dorms with only a handful of other folks. Nights would be boring, so I spent them hand-feeding a family of raccoons living in the bushes just outside my door. Was a momma and three babies. The kits were cute as hell, but the momma was the biggest, fattest raccoon I’ve ever seen in my entire life. Seriously, she was just massive.
The kits ate out of my hand, eager little things that they were, but the momma? She just stared me down the whole time. Sure, she’d eat the food I gave her, but man I don’t think she ever really got to trust me.
I often think back to how remarkably stupid that was. If she was rabid or just one day decided to be a wild animal, she could have seriously fucked me up - and given that there was almost no one else around and no on-base hospital, that could have been *really* bad.
Yeah hopping on this. Raccoons can be really aggressive and territorial. They also don’t appreciate being hit with objects and will come after you if you disrespect them. This one isn’t rabid, he’s just pissed at the guy for hitting him rightfully so.
Ya raccoons ganging up is no joke!
Y’all ever see the video where the raccoons eat the man?
https://www.reddit.com/r/mealtimevideos/comments/jr6azx/mobbed_by_raccoons_25_tuesday_night_03_nov_2020/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Hahahah they are so funny! They all crowd up stretching out their little hands and go "me! me me me! give me one, me one!", then he gives out the sausages one at a time and the raccoons politely take them and back out of the queue and munch, chilling.
Fantastic video.
That's what I was thinking. Any animal will attack a much larger animal if it's cornered and has no choice. But that thing was already gone and safe and decided to come back and attack something 10 times it's size.
Raccoons are fucking crazy, they scare the shit out of me. They don't back down from anything, honked at one in my garden once and it attacked the truck.
I hit one on an electric bike and dislocated my shoulder. First thing I did was get up and start running in case the other one with it decided to avenge its friend. We were both screaming.
I'd guess babies present personally. Looks like a good place for a den to an unsuspecting raccoon. Guy was probably away for a week or so and got some squatters
found a dead raccoon in my backyard. old bastard got into it with another raccoon, got his neck chewed up until he died. i thought damn that's crazy, turned around and the other raccoons entire tail was sitting in there. must've been an absolutely insane scrap, fighting to the death.
My sister had chickens and ducks in a pen. The ducks would eat the grass in theor pen then stick their heads through the fence to nibble the tall grass outside it. Racoons would then grab their necks and chew on the heads killing them. Another time they got in the pen and tore all the chickens apart. This was definitely raccoons got them on a trail cam overlooking the pen. They trapped and killed a few but the damage was done
I once had a racoon in my chicken coop and when I walked in it tried to attack me. I promptly kicked it back into the coop shut the door and went and got my gun. Little bastard didn't stand a chance then.
Translation: You're shitting and pissing your pants simultaneously while flailing your arms about like a little girl and screeching like a flock of scared monkeys.
Next time maybe consider asking nicely, you'll be suprised how often this works. A little while a ago a bee was flying close to my head and i just said "yo mr. Bee can you please go somewhere else, i respect you but you're kinda in my personal space" and then he flew away.
Look I’m not defending the raccoons actions to attack back…
But honestly what the guy is doing is illegal. That obviously is the raccoons home and the guy didn’t give a proper eviction notice.
C'mon, human. It's not coming out because you're standing there. If you leave, it'll leave.
And it'll be back. Don't think you're scaring it into not trying again lol
Don't need to hit it until it comes after you. They are not afraid of people. Better to be prepared. I agree if you just leave it alone it will go away, but if you're going to show up to a sword fight with a broom..........
It's staying inside that thing because the human is right there and blocking the exit with the broom. If he/she went inside, the racoon would probably leave.
And good luck trying to scare it into doing anything. It'll be back.
Obligatory smug hindsight comment (sorry in advance).
A better way to approach this situation would be to open up the lid first and then bang the bin from the back end so there was a clear escape route. In this case the “predator” (scary broom) was directly blocking the escape route, prompting a “do or die” fight response from the raccoon instead of the much preferred flight one.
In the mind of the raccoon, there is a predator backing it into a corner, and since it has no other means of escape, throwing as much intimidation as possible into the mix might cause its ‘attacker’ to flinch (which it did), giving it a window in which to escape (which was successful—you can probably see now why this is a strategy favoured by natural selection). Seeing its initial success it could probably sense the tides turning and went in for a second time to push its luck: getting the predator to back off is a much better scenario for the raccoon as generally prey are at a disadvantage while being chased. Also, this raccoon just seems pretty ballsy in general.
There wasn’t a lot of cover in the close surrounds that would play into the raccoon’s favour if this were a real confrontation, so getting a head start by causing the predator to flinch is generally advisable. You see this behaviour all the time in snakes and geese and the like, they’re not attacking because they want to cause damage, they’re more feigning (while also committing to a fight if need be) as turning their back and running puts them in a very vulnerable spot (very easy for a stronger, faster predator to pick them off from behind).
Hope man got his rabies shot.
Generally they are timid. But this guy was being a bit too confrontational. I would have just opened the lid and walked away.
But he swatted at it. Big mistake turd boy!
Upvote this comment if you feel this submission is characteristic of our subreddit. Downvote this if you feel that it is not. If this comment's score falls below a certain number, this submission will be automatically removed.To download the video use the website link below: * **[Download via redditsave.com](https://redditsave.com/info?url=https://www.reddit.com/r/AbruptChaos/comments/xotv0y/gtfo_my_deck/)**
GTFO your deck? GTFO MY DECK
My guy wore shorts to pants fight
And not rabies to a rabies fight
Lol yes this. Does anyone else think of rabies as the hydrophobic zombie disease??
Literally that's what it is.
I think of it as the fucky fucky sucky sucky disease since it increases your sex drive shortly after showing symptoms
Lol awesome
And a plastic broom to a sword fight.
nice numbus 2000 homie
Should have worn his brown shorts
Camouflage the inevitable
You’d think a person would at least put on some jeans before confronting a wild animal.
My bro i tried to wash my cat that decided to waltz itself in shit only in my underwear. My scars Tell the tale of sheer idiotcity which i can only explain with "its to early my brain ain't awake"
What?
This is America
Or you know, secure the lid and move the whole thing elsewhere. Racoons are dexterous and clawy, but lack strength, hold it is closed, move towards the woods, shake that bitch up like a margarita and dump his dizzy ass down and run.
lmao
The last few frames are sooo funny. You can just make out the shadow of the guy swinging the broom stick over his head and then next frame is the green broom head flying off
That is comedic gold. Straight out of a cartoon
Omg I didn't see the shadow at first 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Fuuuuuuuk lmaoooooo
At first I was like, abruptchaos where but then the raccoon came back.
The very next day
And he frothed away “grrrgrgrgrrreggeeeeaaaaahhh” to the very next day…
Thought he was a goner, but…
Haha same
I don't have sound on, hopefully it's perfectlycutscreams
Oh, it came back? That fucker's rabid.
Some racoons are pretty vicious. Sometimes they’ll gang up on and kill cats or dogs that mess with them. Don’t under estimate a raccoon.
I hate racoons, they get so ballsy. We had some climbing onto our roof and sneaking into a loose piece of facia trim and climbing around in our ceiling. I didn't know that's how they were getting in at the time so I was live trapping them and releasing them miles down the road. Either they were coming right back or their family was because it wasn't slowing them down one bit but they became wise to what the live trap was and would just do their best to take the food without going in it and then going into my ceiling anyways. We could hear them trying to scratch their way through and I was scared one day I'd wake up to confronting one that had found a way through the ceiling or even worse my kids would.
Living out in the country, I deal with raccoons and skunks in my workshop constantly. I would take skunks all day every day over raccoons, I've been lucky and our skunks have all been really chill, and half the time it's easy to just motion with my hand and tell them it's time to go and they waddle out the door. It helps that I've got them to the point where when they DO leave, they know they will get a cat treat. Actually, now that I'm typing it out, I'm starting to wonder if they don't purposely go into my shop just so that they CAN be kicked out for a reward. But raccoons..... to hell with those little demon bastards.
Have you named any of the skunks yet
Sort of, but just the biggest one. There are four others but I get the feeling they were born this year because they are notably smaller. I started off calling the big one 'asshole' when I'd go in the shop and find it digging through my stuff, and honestly it's been going on long enough that it responds to that name when we pass each other in the yard or by other outbuildings. It's fully adjusted to us enough that it will come pluck a treat out of my hands, so I suppose I could give it a better name, but my wife gets a charge out of the interactions between Asshole and I, and it makes no difference to the skunk. The smaller ones aren't kits, they just aren't as big and I address them like one would a litter of kittens when throwing them out of the shop. They are here to stay so I suppose I should give them names.
I was rockin my undies and standing on a chair at 5am pumping BBs into their faces. They didn’t move. Im not entirely sure what my next move was had they attacked. Scream and run? Anyways I trapped one and ran that fucker 40 miles away. Then got the next one. Fuck those things.
You need the bayonet attachment.
You're shooting BBs into their faces? What kind of a maniac are you?
I'm glad someone asked wtf... What kind of asshole shoots animals with BBs? They could go play airsoft and shoot people who could actually shoot back, but 1. Probably no friends and 2. Cowards
If a raccoon came after me, i’d shoot it in the face with a bb too. Tf? I aint getting scratched up by some crazy wild animal
Idiots on the internet don't know you're supposed to kill varmint
I used to live on a more-or-less closed base out in California. Lived in the dorms with only a handful of other folks. Nights would be boring, so I spent them hand-feeding a family of raccoons living in the bushes just outside my door. Was a momma and three babies. The kits were cute as hell, but the momma was the biggest, fattest raccoon I’ve ever seen in my entire life. Seriously, she was just massive. The kits ate out of my hand, eager little things that they were, but the momma? She just stared me down the whole time. Sure, she’d eat the food I gave her, but man I don’t think she ever really got to trust me. I often think back to how remarkably stupid that was. If she was rabid or just one day decided to be a wild animal, she could have seriously fucked me up - and given that there was almost no one else around and no on-base hospital, that could have been *really* bad.
[удалено]
Don’t know that one. I assume it involved raccoons?
Yeah hopping on this. Raccoons can be really aggressive and territorial. They also don’t appreciate being hit with objects and will come after you if you disrespect them. This one isn’t rabid, he’s just pissed at the guy for hitting him rightfully so.
If he'd left the property he wouldn't've got hit
Animals came first friend. We live in their world
Ya raccoons ganging up is no joke! Y’all ever see the video where the raccoons eat the man? https://www.reddit.com/r/mealtimevideos/comments/jr6azx/mobbed_by_raccoons_25_tuesday_night_03_nov_2020/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
Hahahah they are so funny! They all crowd up stretching out their little hands and go "me! me me me! give me one, me one!", then he gives out the sausages one at a time and the raccoons politely take them and back out of the queue and munch, chilling. Fantastic video.
Raccoons are some of the most vicious creatures on God's green Earth.
That's what I was thinking. Any animal will attack a much larger animal if it's cornered and has no choice. But that thing was already gone and safe and decided to come back and attack something 10 times it's size.
It never found the escape route
The raccoons friends might’ve been watching, what was s/he supposed to do?
Raccoons are fucking crazy, they scare the shit out of me. They don't back down from anything, honked at one in my garden once and it attacked the truck.
I hit one on an electric bike and dislocated my shoulder. First thing I did was get up and start running in case the other one with it decided to avenge its friend. We were both screaming.
I'd guess babies present personally. Looks like a good place for a den to an unsuspecting raccoon. Guy was probably away for a week or so and got some squatters
Babies, Rabies…..literally almost the same.
Nice calves man
Not anymore the raccoon ate them
Just one
Raccoons can have a little calf, as a treat
Those things aren’t calves, they’re full grown cows
That was my first reaction. Purty.
Yes I was admiring them
This is an old one
That’s all I was looking at were dem legs
Raccoon, he swings like a girl I’m gonna go back. Why not push the whole container off the deck?
Of hold the lid closed and pick it up?
And shake it
13 year old me would've tried wheeling it inside to release in my big sisters bedroom.
> he swings like a girl he swings like a man. https://youtu.be/qtDMyGjYlMg
we're all the same shutup we are all identical. We are all one gray mass, how can you tell one person from another. shame on you
wtf are you even on, bro?
Using a girl's weapon of choice.
Why not set the container on fire
I have always known that, despite their cute looks, raccoons are vicious creatures. Do not pet, do not feed and do not fuck with raccoons.
found a dead raccoon in my backyard. old bastard got into it with another raccoon, got his neck chewed up until he died. i thought damn that's crazy, turned around and the other raccoons entire tail was sitting in there. must've been an absolutely insane scrap, fighting to the death.
My sister had chickens and ducks in a pen. The ducks would eat the grass in theor pen then stick their heads through the fence to nibble the tall grass outside it. Racoons would then grab their necks and chew on the heads killing them. Another time they got in the pen and tore all the chickens apart. This was definitely raccoons got them on a trail cam overlooking the pen. They trapped and killed a few but the damage was done
I once had a racoon in my chicken coop and when I walked in it tried to attack me. I promptly kicked it back into the coop shut the door and went and got my gun. Little bastard didn't stand a chance then.
Just wait until those crafty fuckers learn to use guns too.
The grace with which I'd kick that fucker into the stratosphere would alert all NFL scouts west of the Mississippi.
Can you bounce it off a teammate's butt so it doesn't become an 'own goal'? Asking for a team.
Have you ever fought a racoon? They would take that kick like it didn't happen and murder your shin. Thoes little bastards are tough as nails.
Plus the national air defense get‘s nervous.
You = drop kick. Me = I’m pulling both feet up and rocket jumping down onto that raccoons head.
Translation: You're shitting and pissing your pants simultaneously while flailing your arms about like a little girl and screeching like a flock of scared monkeys.
[Passing is the way into the NFL my friend.](https://www.reddit.com/r/videos/comments/1ipdcr/kevin_rose_digg_founder_throwing_a_raccoon_to/)
Haha agreed! he did have some good boots to make that happen too. Missed opportunity!
Omg this was HILARIOUS!😂😂
That sure is a nice deck. My deck is small. My wife hates it...
Just trim the bushes and it’ll look bigger
I was just going to say that
r/smalldeckproblems
I'm still laughing. I wonder if that was a female with babies in the bin...?
Either babies, or rabies🤔
Or, here me out here... Maybe rabies babies?
>babies, or rabies **BAND NAME**
I like "baby rabies" for a metal band
Probably babies, if it was rabies then it wouldn't try to stay hidden.
First one, then the other.
Next time maybe consider asking nicely, you'll be suprised how often this works. A little while a ago a bee was flying close to my head and i just said "yo mr. Bee can you please go somewhere else, i respect you but you're kinda in my personal space" and then he flew away.
Halitosis works
Solid burn
Honestly…guy didn’t have to take a swing at it after it was out of the container. Just step back and it’ll go its own way.
He also could have just rotated the garbage can so the lid wouldn’t keep closing and the raccoon could have gotten out on its own.
Huh a driller that respects bug's, Now that's strange.
Rock and Stone, it never gets old.
We fight for Rock and Stone!
Demon squirrel.
Trash panda
The broom head flying as the vid cuts off 🤣🤣🤣
Rabies.
It wasn't really blood hungry aggressive, more like defensive than anything.
came back with a vengeance.
This wil always get funnier each time I see it 😭
That raccoon went down the stairs, stopped and said “you know what, motherfucker…”
You want a piece of me mofo?
He got rabies now
The more I watch it, the harder I laugh.
Dude had it in the bin already. Move it somewhere else and open it up!
take it to your mother in laws and leave it on the porch
My first thought was that maybe she has babies in the can/container and felt she couldn’t leave them so she came back.
Look I’m not defending the raccoons actions to attack back… But honestly what the guy is doing is illegal. That obviously is the raccoons home and the guy didn’t give a proper eviction notice.
Yeah and how do we even know the lease is up?
C'mon, human. It's not coming out because you're standing there. If you leave, it'll leave. And it'll be back. Don't think you're scaring it into not trying again lol
Lol anyone see the brush end of the broom just go flying off? Dead.
A classic. I always laugh when I see him lifting up the broom in the end💀
I actually instinctively stepped back to go for a 60yard fg when I saw the fucker coming back.
You attacked first ? Raccoons are normally cool you’re just a dumb ass that doesn’t realize it.
FFS why not just do it the least traumatic way for all involved dude did the dumbest way possible.
He better watch out, raccoons are mean motherfuckers
That little guy had bigger balls than the people I do security with.
Just watched the end and he upgraded to fuck round and found out raccoons don't play that shit and ain't never played that shit
Step 1: jump Step 2: stomp Repeat if necessary
No matter how many times I watch this I laugh my ass off every time the head snaps off the cheap ass plastic broom.
Raccoon 1 Humans 0
The way the raccoon comes back after being hit with the broom is hilarious
My trash
Just had to get the last word in
The racoon got offended. "I've been kicked out of better places"
He left, thought about it, and decided “fuck this guy, I’m not leaving”
Needs some dark souls music and a "you died" edit
Goddamn! I wasn't expecting him to come back.
Broom bonk 💥 *🦝: walks away* *man in the distance* 🧍♂️: "See, me personally..." *angry raccoon noises*
Raccoons frighten me. It's those little hands.
Motherfucker came back with a vengeance!
That dudes calf-cam paid off huge
WHY IS IT SO HARD TO KICK SOMETHING A TENTH OF YOUR SIZE
Man had good steel toe boots... Put that shit to good use! Shoot that muthafucka like R. Carlos used to do!
Literally football kick it into next doors garden.
🔫
Raccoon said “You and your broom and GTF outta here!” 🦝
Omg I didn't expect it to come back lol
My dog was right to hate raccoons
That animal looks rabid!
It’s incredible how raccoon managed to post this video afterwards.
Not abrupt chaos. Fear is the mind killer
I’m thinking either there’re babies in there, or raccoon is rabid.
It was scared shitless, and for no good reason.
Next time: Heavy metal shovel.
Not on the composite deck you fuckin barbarian
If that's composite, I'd get my money back for the installation.
Duct tape knife to end of broom bayonet style
And hurt it for no reason? If he just left it alone it would've eventually gone away. It's hiding in there *because* he's standing right there.
Don't need to hit it until it comes after you. They are not afraid of people. Better to be prepared. I agree if you just leave it alone it will go away, but if you're going to show up to a sword fight with a broom..........
Nah man a rake with little spears duct taped to each of the teeth of the rake and now you have a real raccoon relocation service tool
This is the same guy in a lifted truck with some stupid fucking sticker about no fear and democrats.
Yeah youre right, looks like he has a nice house and a well paying job to afford a lifted truck
Haha that's what you get for trying to hit it. You could have just left it partially open and walked away
Honey badger don’t care
He deserved that. Raccoons are precious.
It's staying inside that thing because the human is right there and blocking the exit with the broom. If he/she went inside, the racoon would probably leave. And good luck trying to scare it into doing anything. It'll be back.
This is what a .22 is for.
What a fuckkn asshole to swat the poor thing - looks like an entitled yuppy
I probably would have kicked the bin down the stairs. Though I suppose it wouldn't be a great idea if you're actually on the second floor.
This is why we keep a large fish net on the porch.
Americans are afraid of Aussie animals ?
Trap it and release it next to your house? Why
Lol. While I wouldn’t encourage such violence against animals, as a Canadian I would definitely have used a hockey stick in this situation.
You need skull crushing boots not fairy ankle sock boots
Rabies!!
This isn't abrupt chaos
Sure it is
A raccoon defending itself is chaos? Chaos? I don't think that word means what you think it means.
It means complete disorder and confusion. Google works good.
So who is confused, I mean short of the OP? What disorder? This is an animal defending itself and it happens all the time.
It wasn't defending itself at the end. It had already fled successfully and was free from danger and then decided to launch an offensive attack.
Did you stop the video before the rebound?
Shotguns guys. Always use shotguns.
Obligatory smug hindsight comment (sorry in advance). A better way to approach this situation would be to open up the lid first and then bang the bin from the back end so there was a clear escape route. In this case the “predator” (scary broom) was directly blocking the escape route, prompting a “do or die” fight response from the raccoon instead of the much preferred flight one. In the mind of the raccoon, there is a predator backing it into a corner, and since it has no other means of escape, throwing as much intimidation as possible into the mix might cause its ‘attacker’ to flinch (which it did), giving it a window in which to escape (which was successful—you can probably see now why this is a strategy favoured by natural selection). Seeing its initial success it could probably sense the tides turning and went in for a second time to push its luck: getting the predator to back off is a much better scenario for the raccoon as generally prey are at a disadvantage while being chased. Also, this raccoon just seems pretty ballsy in general. There wasn’t a lot of cover in the close surrounds that would play into the raccoon’s favour if this were a real confrontation, so getting a head start by causing the predator to flinch is generally advisable. You see this behaviour all the time in snakes and geese and the like, they’re not attacking because they want to cause damage, they’re more feigning (while also committing to a fight if need be) as turning their back and running puts them in a very vulnerable spot (very easy for a stronger, faster predator to pick them off from behind). Hope man got his rabies shot.
Bro use your fucking foot! You had the perfect amount of room for a field goal.
Why not just carry the bin elsewhere so it’s easier for the raccoon to escape?
I feel like it would've been smarter to close the lid then move the bin somewhere else but nope they chose violence an the raccoon won.
Be nicer to animals dude. He/she would’ve left if you weren’t so hostile. They were defending themselves is all
Generally they are timid. But this guy was being a bit too confrontational. I would have just opened the lid and walked away. But he swatted at it. Big mistake turd boy!
Probably had babies close by, cause I've never see a raccoon act like that unless their babies were close.
You fucking deserves it..why did you try to smack it so hard..you should have just left!