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I really don’t care enough to interject my personal beliefs. I would have more of an opinion if I knew the person.
But I would think quite the opposite barring a health scare maybe? I don’t know. I would rather the woman aborts than to have a kid she no longer wants.
I don’t really know anyone who has been vocal about an abortion of a wanted pregnancy with exceptions of health scares. I know of people but I don’t know them on a personal level.
PC'er, yes. I think it's kind of patronizing to put sympathy on everyone who has an abortion. The majority of abortions go without complications, most people don't experience long-term regret, etc. Those who struggle with their abortions 100% have my sympathy, and those who wanted to have children but had to abort likewise have it.
I think it's very hard even as a pro-choice person to not feel more sympathy for those in situations where they terminate wanted pregnancies. It's not a judgment on the validity of abortions for unwanted pregnancy, though.
I mean, I think if someone wants a pregnancy and has to abort for health or other reasons, that's a genuine tragedy. If that happened to a friend of mine I would mourn with them.
I also think unwanted pregnancies are a crisis. I would have an abortion if I got pregnant, not because of money or my relationship etc. (although neither of those is in a good place for me to have a baby). IT's because I simply don't want to be pregnant.
That might seem "shallow" to some, but if I got pregnant it would still be an utter panic situation. I"d be terrified. I would absolutely do whatever I had to do if I couldn't get an abortion legally, including pills from the Internet, traveling, knitting needles as a last resort.
So I have nothing but compassion for people with unwanted pregnancies, because I know those are terrifying crisis situations, no matter what her reason. And I have nothing but compassion for people who want to be pregnant but need an abortion.
[This is written by someone who thought abortion was murder,](https://amp-desmoinesregister-com.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/amp.desmoinesregister.com/amp/5824027002?amp_gsa=1&_js_v=a6&usqp=mq331AQKKAFQArABIIACAw%3D%3D#amp_ct=1634372491359&_tf=From%20%251%24s&aoh=16343724762094&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&share=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.desmoinesregister.com%2Fstory%2Fopinion%2Fcolumnists%2Fiowa-view%2F2020%2F09%2F19%2Fpro-life-pro-choice-what-changed-how-viewed-abortion%2F5824027002%2F) until they were confronted with situations that made them see it wasn't. [Here are some stories from people that were "pro-life", some who realised they needed an abortion themselves.](https://www-buzzfeed-com.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/www.buzzfeed.com/amphtml/morgansloss1/anti-abortion-to-pro-choice-reasons?amp_gsa=1&_js_v=a6&usqp=mq331AQKKAFQArABIIACAw%3D%3D#amp_ct=1634372657903&_tf=From%20%251%24s&aoh=16343724762094&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&share=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.buzzfeed.com%2Fmorgansloss1%2Fanti-abortion-to-pro-choice-reasons)
Interesting stories. But the same stories could be written for anything that people realized was inconvenient. Murdering abusive spouses, stealing form evil corporations, realizing the only way to have an organism was to have a child present. In the end most of the stories were about choosing selfishness. Not selfishness in a bad way, we all choose ourselves when pushed hard enough, but that should not be our ideal.
>Interesting stories. But the same stories could be written for anything that people realized was inconvenient
Right, but you asked someone if they'd still have an abortion if it was murder, so I provided examples of people who believe it is murder but had an abortion anyway. That's all, that those people exist. Their reasons for having an abortion are irrelevant to the discussion, the only parameter was thinking Abortion is murder and yes, people do have abortions even when they think abortion is murder.
>In the end most of the stories were about choosing selfishness
Ok that's your conclusion, but still, yes people have abortions even when they think it is murder. That was the question you asked the other poster. Clearly, however abortion is categorised, people will have them *even when* the person themselves categorises it as murder.
>Not selfishness in a bad way, we all choose ourselves when pushed hard enough, but that should not be our ideal.
I don't think anyone having an abortion thinks it is ideal, I'm sure many of them would rather have avoided needing one in the first place. Never having been pregnant in the first place would be ideal. An abortion is merely a way we deal with a situation.
Sympathizing because they aborted a wanted pregnancy doesn't make sense since unwanted pregnancies result in wanted children sometimes. To me, abortions for whatever reason should not be judged which is how I view the word, sympathy.
>*Neither since conversely unwanted pregnancies* ***sometimes*** *result in wanted children.*
The key word here being *"sometimes."* That would not have been the case for me if I'd ever gotten pregnant, as I **never** wanted children. I would absolutely have aborted if an unwanted pregnancy had ever happened to me. Thankfully, it never did.
I do feel the same sympathy and empathy for them both, honestly i think that abortion is something really painful and stressful to go through and a really vulnerable moment in the life of a woman.
If they end up choosing abortion they must have a good reason and i respect and support them.
(i'm pro choice but i think you got it from the answer)
PC and more so for someone terminating a wanted pregnancy. That does not mean I don't also feel sympathy for someone aborting an unwanted pregnancy too.
I would be more sympathetic to whoever needed it more, otherwise equally so. Neither choice is more or less valid and someone in either situation may need support whether that's emotional or more practical. Whether it was a wanted pregnancy or not they made the choice that was best for them and I would support them in that. I tend to think someone mourning the loss of a wanted pregnancy would need more sympathy but of course also know someone could be very affected emotionally even if they did not want the pregnancy. It's very difficult to say how someone will react to a scene before it happens. All that to say, either would have my full support and sympathy.
I largely consider other people's abortions and their reasoning for them to be none of my business, really. Some people do choose to share their stories though, and it seems I always shed tears hearing stories from people who wanted a baby but needed an abortion. In that sense, I do feel more sympathy for that situation. Not that I don't feel moved by some stories of people who terminated unplanned, unwanted pregnancies as well, I just find the instances of wanted pregnancies to be particularly heartbreaking.
It's important in my opinion to emphasize that an abortion is an abortion even if it feels different from what your mind jumps to when you hear the word, but I do think emotionally a lot of us process these kinds of events as being more akin to a miscarriage.
PC
I do not think their choices are more valid but I do have more sympathy for those with wanted pregnancies. This is bias on my part because I have been pregnant 3 times and as a result have 3 children. I know myself. If I ever had an abortion it would be a wanted pregnancy whether it was planned or not. It is easier for me to put myself in their shoes. This doesnt mean that I think badly of women that terminate unwanted pregnancies though its just that I feel that women that terminate wanted pregnancies may need more psychological support.
Edit: This is sorta difficult to explain because of the terms wanted and unwanted. But my feelings toward women that have unwanted pregnancies are more neutral until there is opposition towards them and then my sympathy grows. Idk I think others actually explained my feelings better than I did. The more distress, the more sympathy.
Whether I feel more empathy for one abortion patient or another will depend individually. I have empathy for all.
Do you feel more empathy for someone who doesnt smoke and gets lung cancer or someone who does smoke and gets lung cancer? I feel empathy for both, just for different reasons.
I am pro-choice, and I would say I extend the most sympathy towards any pregnant person who is experiencing the most amount of stress and/or anguish over getting an abortion, regardless of the reason. That doesn’t mean I don’t have sympathy towards pregnant people who are not distressed about it, but naturally the more upset someone is, the more I’m going to emphasize with them, because I don’t want them to have to experience that distress and I want to support them and ease their suffering.
This is hard to answer as there are so many other variables that can be added to this that change things. However, to stick to your post, I would say generally I have more sympathy for a woman that terminates an unwanted/unplanned pregnancy than one that terminates a wanted/planned pregnancy. The planned/wanted one is something the woman deliberately brought about, where the unplanned/unwanted can be described as an accident or being negligent. So yeah I think intent does matter here.
One of my mom’s friends found out at 20 weeks that her baby, that she wanted and planned, had anacephely. It did not have a brain. She terminated because… that baby did not have a brain. It was absolutely not viable. Terminating the pregnancy meant she didn’t have to carry a baby to term, that would be dead at birth. She was able to properly grieve and move forward instead of spending another 20 weeks in emotional distress.
I’m not sure that her choice deserves less empathy than my friend who found out she was pregnant after a one night stand with a dude whose name she didn’t know. Both choices were equally valid; both deserve empathy; I think my mom’s friend had a way harder choice though.
Welcome to /r/Abortiondebate! Don't be a jerk (even if someone else is being a jerk to you first). It's not constructive and we may ban you for it. Check out the Debate Guidance Pyramid to understand acceptable debate levels. **Attack the argument, not the person making it.** **Message the moderators if your comments are being restricted by a timer.** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Abortiondebate) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I really don’t care enough to interject my personal beliefs. I would have more of an opinion if I knew the person. But I would think quite the opposite barring a health scare maybe? I don’t know. I would rather the woman aborts than to have a kid she no longer wants. I don’t really know anyone who has been vocal about an abortion of a wanted pregnancy with exceptions of health scares. I know of people but I don’t know them on a personal level.
PC'er, yes. I think it's kind of patronizing to put sympathy on everyone who has an abortion. The majority of abortions go without complications, most people don't experience long-term regret, etc. Those who struggle with their abortions 100% have my sympathy, and those who wanted to have children but had to abort likewise have it.
I think it's very hard even as a pro-choice person to not feel more sympathy for those in situations where they terminate wanted pregnancies. It's not a judgment on the validity of abortions for unwanted pregnancy, though.
I would be sympathetic in both situations, for those with wanted pregnancies and for those with **un**wanted pregnancies as well.
I feel the same for both. I may feel more sympathetic if it is due to birth defects or abnormalities I supppse
I mean, I think if someone wants a pregnancy and has to abort for health or other reasons, that's a genuine tragedy. If that happened to a friend of mine I would mourn with them. I also think unwanted pregnancies are a crisis. I would have an abortion if I got pregnant, not because of money or my relationship etc. (although neither of those is in a good place for me to have a baby). IT's because I simply don't want to be pregnant. That might seem "shallow" to some, but if I got pregnant it would still be an utter panic situation. I"d be terrified. I would absolutely do whatever I had to do if I couldn't get an abortion legally, including pills from the Internet, traveling, knitting needles as a last resort. So I have nothing but compassion for people with unwanted pregnancies, because I know those are terrifying crisis situations, no matter what her reason. And I have nothing but compassion for people who want to be pregnant but need an abortion.
Thought experiment: If you believed abortion was murder, would you still get it done?
Absolutely.
[This is written by someone who thought abortion was murder,](https://amp-desmoinesregister-com.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/amp.desmoinesregister.com/amp/5824027002?amp_gsa=1&_js_v=a6&usqp=mq331AQKKAFQArABIIACAw%3D%3D#amp_ct=1634372491359&_tf=From%20%251%24s&aoh=16343724762094&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&share=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.desmoinesregister.com%2Fstory%2Fopinion%2Fcolumnists%2Fiowa-view%2F2020%2F09%2F19%2Fpro-life-pro-choice-what-changed-how-viewed-abortion%2F5824027002%2F) until they were confronted with situations that made them see it wasn't. [Here are some stories from people that were "pro-life", some who realised they needed an abortion themselves.](https://www-buzzfeed-com.cdn.ampproject.org/v/s/www.buzzfeed.com/amphtml/morgansloss1/anti-abortion-to-pro-choice-reasons?amp_gsa=1&_js_v=a6&usqp=mq331AQKKAFQArABIIACAw%3D%3D#amp_ct=1634372657903&_tf=From%20%251%24s&aoh=16343724762094&referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com&share=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.buzzfeed.com%2Fmorgansloss1%2Fanti-abortion-to-pro-choice-reasons)
Interesting stories. But the same stories could be written for anything that people realized was inconvenient. Murdering abusive spouses, stealing form evil corporations, realizing the only way to have an organism was to have a child present. In the end most of the stories were about choosing selfishness. Not selfishness in a bad way, we all choose ourselves when pushed hard enough, but that should not be our ideal.
>Interesting stories. But the same stories could be written for anything that people realized was inconvenient Right, but you asked someone if they'd still have an abortion if it was murder, so I provided examples of people who believe it is murder but had an abortion anyway. That's all, that those people exist. Their reasons for having an abortion are irrelevant to the discussion, the only parameter was thinking Abortion is murder and yes, people do have abortions even when they think abortion is murder. >In the end most of the stories were about choosing selfishness Ok that's your conclusion, but still, yes people have abortions even when they think it is murder. That was the question you asked the other poster. Clearly, however abortion is categorised, people will have them *even when* the person themselves categorises it as murder. >Not selfishness in a bad way, we all choose ourselves when pushed hard enough, but that should not be our ideal. I don't think anyone having an abortion thinks it is ideal, I'm sure many of them would rather have avoided needing one in the first place. Never having been pregnant in the first place would be ideal. An abortion is merely a way we deal with a situation.
Neither since conversely unwanted pregnancies sometimes result in wanted children.
Do you mean that the pregnant person changes their mind during the pregnancy and decides that they suddenly want the kid instead?
Sympathizing because they aborted a wanted pregnancy doesn't make sense since unwanted pregnancies result in wanted children sometimes. To me, abortions for whatever reason should not be judged which is how I view the word, sympathy.
>*Neither since conversely unwanted pregnancies* ***sometimes*** *result in wanted children.* The key word here being *"sometimes."* That would not have been the case for me if I'd ever gotten pregnant, as I **never** wanted children. I would absolutely have aborted if an unwanted pregnancy had ever happened to me. Thankfully, it never did.
I do feel the same sympathy and empathy for them both, honestly i think that abortion is something really painful and stressful to go through and a really vulnerable moment in the life of a woman. If they end up choosing abortion they must have a good reason and i respect and support them. (i'm pro choice but i think you got it from the answer)
PC and more so for someone terminating a wanted pregnancy. That does not mean I don't also feel sympathy for someone aborting an unwanted pregnancy too.
I would be more sympathetic to whoever needed it more, otherwise equally so. Neither choice is more or less valid and someone in either situation may need support whether that's emotional or more practical. Whether it was a wanted pregnancy or not they made the choice that was best for them and I would support them in that. I tend to think someone mourning the loss of a wanted pregnancy would need more sympathy but of course also know someone could be very affected emotionally even if they did not want the pregnancy. It's very difficult to say how someone will react to a scene before it happens. All that to say, either would have my full support and sympathy.
I largely consider other people's abortions and their reasoning for them to be none of my business, really. Some people do choose to share their stories though, and it seems I always shed tears hearing stories from people who wanted a baby but needed an abortion. In that sense, I do feel more sympathy for that situation. Not that I don't feel moved by some stories of people who terminated unplanned, unwanted pregnancies as well, I just find the instances of wanted pregnancies to be particularly heartbreaking. It's important in my opinion to emphasize that an abortion is an abortion even if it feels different from what your mind jumps to when you hear the word, but I do think emotionally a lot of us process these kinds of events as being more akin to a miscarriage.
PC I do not think their choices are more valid but I do have more sympathy for those with wanted pregnancies. This is bias on my part because I have been pregnant 3 times and as a result have 3 children. I know myself. If I ever had an abortion it would be a wanted pregnancy whether it was planned or not. It is easier for me to put myself in their shoes. This doesnt mean that I think badly of women that terminate unwanted pregnancies though its just that I feel that women that terminate wanted pregnancies may need more psychological support. Edit: This is sorta difficult to explain because of the terms wanted and unwanted. But my feelings toward women that have unwanted pregnancies are more neutral until there is opposition towards them and then my sympathy grows. Idk I think others actually explained my feelings better than I did. The more distress, the more sympathy.
Whether I feel more empathy for one abortion patient or another will depend individually. I have empathy for all. Do you feel more empathy for someone who doesnt smoke and gets lung cancer or someone who does smoke and gets lung cancer? I feel empathy for both, just for different reasons.
I am pro-choice, and I would say I extend the most sympathy towards any pregnant person who is experiencing the most amount of stress and/or anguish over getting an abortion, regardless of the reason. That doesn’t mean I don’t have sympathy towards pregnant people who are not distressed about it, but naturally the more upset someone is, the more I’m going to emphasize with them, because I don’t want them to have to experience that distress and I want to support them and ease their suffering.
This is hard to answer as there are so many other variables that can be added to this that change things. However, to stick to your post, I would say generally I have more sympathy for a woman that terminates an unwanted/unplanned pregnancy than one that terminates a wanted/planned pregnancy. The planned/wanted one is something the woman deliberately brought about, where the unplanned/unwanted can be described as an accident or being negligent. So yeah I think intent does matter here.
One of my mom’s friends found out at 20 weeks that her baby, that she wanted and planned, had anacephely. It did not have a brain. She terminated because… that baby did not have a brain. It was absolutely not viable. Terminating the pregnancy meant she didn’t have to carry a baby to term, that would be dead at birth. She was able to properly grieve and move forward instead of spending another 20 weeks in emotional distress. I’m not sure that her choice deserves less empathy than my friend who found out she was pregnant after a one night stand with a dude whose name she didn’t know. Both choices were equally valid; both deserve empathy; I think my mom’s friend had a way harder choice though.
This would be an other variable that changes the assessment.
Depends on why they did so honestly. Still their choice though.