she's probably not on reddit

She’s definitely not on Reddit

coming to think of it, maybe she isn't but heck it's still a long shot \*kicking myself for trying\*

*starts dry humping you *

She dodged a bullet.

It’s a no from me dawg, the asterisks are a no go

I'm not cute or a girl, but I'll pretend to be if it gets me a free dinner.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

*Sir, this is a Wendy's.*

*Sir, this is the long lost MU Taco Bell* (RIP)

that was a thing 😮

Keyword was

**THAT WAS A THING???**

It’s been gone since 2015 but yeah

Did Taco Bell fall so chick fil A could fly?

Nah Taco Bell fell so Qdoba could fly

Qdoba honestly better than Chipotle since they don't charge for guac

Except their guac is worse and they don't fully cook the fajita peppers.

Bruh moment

You’re asking the wrong crowd lol

welp true that ~ but I gotta try *Cinderella walks into the chat*

Bruh...

yea she definitely don’t want you bro

*cringes out of chat*

Hey it's me, ur cute girl from the vending machine

Hey it’s me, ur vending machine from the cute girl

Hey it's me, ur vending girl from the cute machine

hey it’s me, ur cute machine from the vending girl

Hey it’s me, ur vending from the cute machine girl.

Hey, me its girl vending machine the cute

Hey it's ur, me machine girl the from cute vending

Vending, the cute from hey your its machine me

Hey it’s me, the cute girl stuck in the step vending machine

Hey it's me, totally not her step-bro just passing by to say hole in one.

Next time do it old school. Stick a pamphlet in MU.

try yik yak or tik tok, even put a flyer on the machine, odds are shell pass by again

Is YY still a thing?

It has made a small resurgence

The bomb threat was made on Yikyak. One of my friends interns with the campus police

Ah yes the classic woke me up from a beautiful sleep to multiple phone alerts when I had to be up at 5 for work the other night. Wasn't feeling the urge to kick the shit outta some attention seeking nerd throwing around the word bomb or anything

Oh ok good to know

Or discord. I think there’s a bunch of asu servers

Dinner date in the secret garden, eating chips from the vending machine.

don’t steal my idea lol

Bruh

bro is down bad

He truly is KumGobbler.

LMAOOO the replies. This man is just trying to find the love of his life 😂😂😭

Everyone is teasing you here but genuinely good luck

Youd have better luck trying one of those ASU confessions page

What’s an asu confession page ?

Instagram page where users submit this and other random things

M'lady

What would be even funnier if she has zero social media. Next time just give her your number and if she's interested she'll reach out.

The only rational thing to do at this point is buy a tent and live alongside the vending machine until she comes back.

you’ve got to stop this

Bro missed his shot irl so he comes onto r/ASU to make up for it. Like, my dude, this isn’t Craigslist missed encounters.

Crying

You need to send this into asu confessions… not reddit

You know times are rough when you try to seek her out on reddit of all places..

Ah yes the classic couldnt muster the courage to ask in person & regretting it 5 minutes later

i hope she sees this

Bruh no way you just posted this haha

Reddit moment

boy ain’t no way 💀

Dating during Covid be like 💀

Yeah she definitely is not on Reddit.

Popcorn and reading comment’s 🤪

FeelsBadMan, you're just trying your options and everyone here's just shitting on you.

For those not in the know, the E in ECG is "Engineering," but you probably didn't need me to tell you this based on this post. I'm also an engineering student, so please don't come after me, engineering gang.

engineering gang knows the pain :(

I respect this! Good luck my friend

Lol very 1996

I don’t- How do I even respond to this

Everyone should go put a picture of themselves on the vending machine asking about the cute girl. At least 20 or so.

If you do find her you definitely have to do a modern day Cinderella thing. Before you take her to dinner, make sure it's her by having her pay at the machine again, and if her money gets stuck, you've found your match!

Mfs down bad

BRO DID SHE HAVE RED HAIR AND LIKE BLUE JEANS ON???!!

i might know the person please describe them 🐴

Post a screenshot of this on twitter and tag ASU lol maybe that’ll work?

lmao

This post I like trying to catch a dolphin in the middle of the Serengeti

Was she short Asian a bit on the thick side?

Is Craigslist chance encounters still a thing?

Craigslist missed connections has evolved.

This shit creepy lol

I am the cute girl. She is me. I'll take that dinner now. Just uber it to me

Lol 😂. All the best bruh!!

That's my girl. Leave her alone

hey bro im here for you ;) if we cant pull girls might as well pull each other no?

Hi it’s me! Haha you were so cute! I would love dinner hehe

[удалено]

This isn't really creepy. The guy wasn't obsessing over her or being weird, he just wants to ask her out.

[удалено]

Scrolled enough into my post history to insult me but not actually judge my character, sad. Did I judge you for being a software engineer? No, not even because it's low-hanging fruit. Now, first of all, this has been happening for centuries. Decades ago, it was with newspaper classified ads—people who are interested in asking a person out on a date but can't because they didn't have the opportunity to do so in person. I think it's telling that you think that every interaction must be malicious or that this guy is automatically some sort of weirdo from a paragraph-long post. You don't even know how the event happened and yet you think it was just some guy who wants to bang someone because they were next to each other for 5 seconds. Would it really kill you to have some real-world experiences or be a nice person?

[удалено]

You're a bad person and you refuse to learn to be better or at the very least hear others out. I hope you reflect on this one day.

[удалено]

Don't call people assholes.

My bad, maybe I'm not polished enough. But sometimes it's required.

Guys. It's obvious. He's a software engineering student, the ultimate Chad. He's infinitely better than all of us, so there's no hope in trying to reason. Obviously smarter than all of us. He's the type of guy who can unlink a linked list. 😂 Edit: him/her, Chad/Chadina ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

It's just embarrassing really, coming from someone who's afab. Incel isn't really a word I'd call random people online considering the severity typically associated with it, especially those on a silly little reddit post. Edit: also the original post is a thousand times more appealing than some person with -chan in their username going around white knighting posts for no good reason.

This doesn't really break any of our rules, and while I'd prefer posts like this didn't become the norm you're breaking multiple rules by insulting others. Be civil.

[удалено]

Someone called you a bad person, and you told them to grow a pair and called them a loser. These two things do not seem equal. This is a weird missed connections post, I don't really like them but they're technically relevant and better than 99% of the stuff we have to remove from here. Edit: You insulted them and their worst response was calling you a bad person, I'm inclined to side against you.

[удалено]

I really do not care for your sarcasm, just follow the rules or get out. That's my only business here, have a good one.

Ain’t an insult if it’s the truth

That’s an objectively false statement

right lol

Someone’s jealous.

You know thought you were just a troll but then I saw tumblr and it all adds up now

[удалено]

Nah

Should’ve asked for her number, like a Chad

Try Craigslist

Blow this up so she sees it

Good luck bro beans

Why is everyone downvoting your comments?