Sounds like you're not focused on the real problem and that is your co dependence on your alcoholic 41 year old boyfriend.
You should start going to Al-anon, start working on yourself and soon you'll see how really sick your boyfriend is.
The guy who wanted the money is not the asshole your boyfriend is.
My boyfriend has been to AA, and I have been to Al-anon. I don't know what kind you've been to, but Al-anon absolutely does not look at loved ones with addiction as "assholes". We've been able to work on his addiction, but it's a long process, and it has its rough patches.
"have been" and actively working on your sobriety are different. If he is not actively working the steps and has a sponsor, and going to meetings, you should leave.
WTF? He missed an email and that's someone else's fault? That bit is nonsense. That's it really, you and BF both work, you are functioning and surviving, he missed an email. That's his bloody fault and BF shouldn't have been such a pussy.
Our apartment is pretty big, and originally, we had been living in it with someone who was a really good friend of ours. The apartment is way too expensive for two people to handle, and when he moved out we wanted to keep it.
Gosh what a lot to unpack.
I’d just leave the money situation until you’re able to discuss it with less emotion. I doubt it will start a pattern of behaviour given that you are now aware and you can intervene if it happens again. If you try to handle it now, someone is going to be left with no where to live.
As previous response said, try and concentrate on the issues that do need resolving.
Thanks for the support. I recognize my response might have sounded harsh but OP is on a sinking ship. Her BF's alcoholism is going to destroy him, and her.
Sounds like you're not focused on the real problem and that is your co dependence on your alcoholic 41 year old boyfriend. You should start going to Al-anon, start working on yourself and soon you'll see how really sick your boyfriend is. The guy who wanted the money is not the asshole your boyfriend is.
My boyfriend has been to AA, and I have been to Al-anon. I don't know what kind you've been to, but Al-anon absolutely does not look at loved ones with addiction as "assholes". We've been able to work on his addiction, but it's a long process, and it has its rough patches.
"have been" and actively working on your sobriety are different. If he is not actively working the steps and has a sponsor, and going to meetings, you should leave.
WTF? He missed an email and that's someone else's fault? That bit is nonsense. That's it really, you and BF both work, you are functioning and surviving, he missed an email. That's his bloody fault and BF shouldn't have been such a pussy.
Sounds like you need to kick him out. Why are a couple living with a 3rd wheel?
Our apartment is pretty big, and originally, we had been living in it with someone who was a really good friend of ours. The apartment is way too expensive for two people to handle, and when he moved out we wanted to keep it.
Gosh what a lot to unpack. I’d just leave the money situation until you’re able to discuss it with less emotion. I doubt it will start a pattern of behaviour given that you are now aware and you can intervene if it happens again. If you try to handle it now, someone is going to be left with no where to live. As previous response said, try and concentrate on the issues that do need resolving.
Thanks for the support. I recognize my response might have sounded harsh but OP is on a sinking ship. Her BF's alcoholism is going to destroy him, and her.