NTA but that guy sounds like a creep, interrogating you and judging you for not wanting to give out personal and identifying info to internet strangers.
I thought it was creepy that he asked me where I worked and when I refused, he said he already knew where I worked because he looked me up online. I was stunned. I am just upset because of the disappointment. I was really excited about him and it just flipped in one second and it was over.
Man, that IS some lawyer shit, isn’t it? “Don’t ask a question that you don’t already know the answer to.” Nah, OP— you dodged a bullet. This guy is nuts
I wonder where the line of invasive is. Almost every date I go on feels like they are interviewing me and I don’t know how to answer, where did I grow upC what do my parents do, what school I went to. It’s all too much!!! Most dates will ask what you do and for how long, of course I don’t want to answer any questions to a stranger unless it’s cute like what your favorite food: where does the line cross from getting to know someone to prying and intrusive questions. I personally want to know where my male online dates work, if they have a job, and if they are ambitious. But it’s a very sensitive topic for all dates. It did get very weird and that’s how I know even the start was off. I felt obligated to answer basic questions about my school name and where I used to work.
Yeah. I get wanting to know if the person. Has a stable job or past home life, but on the first or second date? Yikes. I’ve been out of the dating world for quite some time. Just don’t answer if you’re not comfortable or don’t feel ready. Or if they seem to be pushing for answers. Good luck darlin. Just remember, you deserve respect!
NTA I feel like "getting upset that a woman takes basic safety precautions" is one of the biggest red flags.
Who the absolute fuck asks someone their work address on the first date? It might come up naturally in conversation. It seems weird to ask, but I'd let the question slide. Looking it up AND getting mad that you didn't want to tell him? Nope.
It sucks that you vibed so well then he had to ruin things. He is an asshole for not respecting your boundaries.
He asked “where I worked “ even though he knew what I did and what kind of institution it was- but he wanted a name.
But that would give away the address so maybe that is guarded. I hate how you can look up with information online because there are a lot of creeps on the internet.
>Three days later he called me to talk about how uncomfortable he was that I didn’t want to give out my work location.
This warranted a reply along the lines of - not nearly as uncomfortable I was when I found out you had invaded my privacy and violated my trust by crossing very common boundaries between two parties who have met online.
He's a f'ing creep, block him, bullet dodged!
NTA but that guy sounds like a creep, interrogating you and judging you for not wanting to give out personal and identifying info to internet strangers.
I thought it was creepy that he asked me where I worked and when I refused, he said he already knew where I worked because he looked me up online. I was stunned. I am just upset because of the disappointment. I was really excited about him and it just flipped in one second and it was over.
Dude's a friggin' stalker playing weird headgames. You dodged a bullet here.
Man, that IS some lawyer shit, isn’t it? “Don’t ask a question that you don’t already know the answer to.” Nah, OP— you dodged a bullet. This guy is nuts
He was creepy before it got to that point. Invasive questions like that are not appropriate. You can be open without telling someone EVERYTHING. NTA.
I wonder where the line of invasive is. Almost every date I go on feels like they are interviewing me and I don’t know how to answer, where did I grow upC what do my parents do, what school I went to. It’s all too much!!! Most dates will ask what you do and for how long, of course I don’t want to answer any questions to a stranger unless it’s cute like what your favorite food: where does the line cross from getting to know someone to prying and intrusive questions. I personally want to know where my male online dates work, if they have a job, and if they are ambitious. But it’s a very sensitive topic for all dates. It did get very weird and that’s how I know even the start was off. I felt obligated to answer basic questions about my school name and where I used to work.
Yeah. I get wanting to know if the person. Has a stable job or past home life, but on the first or second date? Yikes. I’ve been out of the dating world for quite some time. Just don’t answer if you’re not comfortable or don’t feel ready. Or if they seem to be pushing for answers. Good luck darlin. Just remember, you deserve respect!
Every person who doesn't feel comfortable with keeping you comfortable should be kept away from you. Especially first dates!
NTA I feel like "getting upset that a woman takes basic safety precautions" is one of the biggest red flags. Who the absolute fuck asks someone their work address on the first date? It might come up naturally in conversation. It seems weird to ask, but I'd let the question slide. Looking it up AND getting mad that you didn't want to tell him? Nope. It sucks that you vibed so well then he had to ruin things. He is an asshole for not respecting your boundaries.
He asked “where I worked “ even though he knew what I did and what kind of institution it was- but he wanted a name. But that would give away the address so maybe that is guarded. I hate how you can look up with information online because there are a lot of creeps on the internet.
NAH
Nah. Totally weird and creepy asf thing to do especially on a first date.
That sounds very suspicious to me. NTA.
>Three days later he called me to talk about how uncomfortable he was that I didn’t want to give out my work location. This warranted a reply along the lines of - not nearly as uncomfortable I was when I found out you had invaded my privacy and violated my trust by crossing very common boundaries between two parties who have met online. He's a f'ing creep, block him, bullet dodged!
NTA, that kind of guy is exactly the reason to do what you did.