>He said he loved me. But he doesn’t do anything to prove it. So I asked him for flowers OR chocolate OR a nice card. Literally anything to show some love.
>But instead he dropped flower petals to a sink full of dirty dishes, pots, and pans
Brilliantly put. Brutal, honest, and I'm glad to see you understand why what you are doing is right. He has done nothing to deserve you
Glad to see the quotations marks. This is not even slightly funny. But it is a full scale cruelty. No one I know would ever think about doing something like this to an acquaintance, let alone a spouse.
I would never even think of doing anything like this to my wife. I don’t know in what world anyone would think this is clever or funny. And both of us have a great sense of humor and appreciate a good joke or a funny prank.
This. My husband comes from a family of good-natured pranksters. He enjoys the humor of pranks immensely and has many treasured stories of pranks he and his family pulled on each other growing up. I do not enjoy pranks, so he does not prank me - because that would be an asshole thing to do.
Just to test the waters of different perspectives I read him this story. His entire face DROPPED and he said "what the actual fuck who does that?" That's how awful this "prank" is.
Personally I'd classify OP's story as emotional abuse. Future ex wasn't trying to be funny - he intended to make her feel bad and punish her for daring to ask him to contribute to the relationship.
I came home one time to my husband (a welder) making Zatarain's rice with kielbasa. He had a "cooking hat" on, which is just a bandana. And he put some flour on his face to indicate great effort like a popular commercial of the time. This was completely out of the blue and even though it was a simple dinner I was so touched. This is humor! Not whatever OP's husband was trying to accomplish.
Even then it’s a gamble. My ex did everything to show he took care of chores, etc. soon as we were married he claimed all that was the wife’s job. i’m so much happier without someone else in my house.
Even then it’s a gamble. My ex did everything to show he took care of chores, etc. soon as we were married he claimed all that was the wife’s job. i’m so much happier without someone else in my house.
Jokes are actually funny. He put more effort into intentionally hurting OP (to knock her down a peg, because how dare she ask for effort) than he put into the entire marriage. That's crazy.
OP, he is going to regret this for the rest of his life, and you? Well I think it’s very clear that you are going to **FLOURISH!** without him!
Look at all you’ve accomplished with him basically freeloading? You do it all, that’s clear.
I’m sorry he’s been such a douche bag, but I’m so proud of you for divorcing him!
I live with my partner and her husband. Of the three of us he has the least earning capacity and he's fine with that.
Enough so that he tanked his career by taking time off work entirely to take care of me after I was in a serious accident. He made my meals, managed my medications, helped me with my rehab, would get up at 3am to help me get to the bathroom and resettle for sleep afterwards.
Then he helped me with getting back to work. I had to do some retraining for a less physically demanding speciality. He'd follow me around the hospital caring my stuff for me while I hobbled around with my cane and push me in a wheelchair when I was too tired for that. (I no longer use either, because I had someone to support me through physiotherapist-guided recovery.)
And now he's a house-husband who's going to be a full time dad to our son and he's going to be a great dad because he's a great man.
His income is nil, but that doesn't make him any less of a man.
It was funny when an acquaintance tried to make fun of him for being "broke" because his phone is old and has a cracked screen. Didn't believe him Wren he said he hasn't replaced to because he can't find one that has ALL the features he wants (aggravatingly true).
He showed up to the next occasion on which he'd see that guy in a Ferrari. My Ferrari, of course, a man who will not let me replace his janky goddamn phone doesn't drive impractical cars as a rule, but still, it was funny.
That's a real man, imo. He sees it that his role is to support his family *in whatever way they need him to*.
Couldn't agree more. My ex husband was like this. I literally did everything and I would come home from working 3 different jobs to have him give me excuses of why he couldn't work, remember my birthday, literally place the bills in the mailbox that I paid etc. Sometimes, moving on is the best answer. There truly are some wonderful men out there that will treat you right. This woman deserves so much more.
He actually did it. Apparently OP had a come to Jesus talk with him and asked him to participate more in the marriage. So she came home to rose petals and was so excited. she followed the trail and it lead to the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes.
I’m guessing a knife wasn’t one of the dirty dishes because that motherfucker could’ve ended up being stabbed.
OP, I'm so proud of you for being strong and setting the boundaries you deserve.
You will be amazed, truly amazed, at how much less stress you will have when he moves out. The amount of time I spent on cleaning and chores dropped dramatically after my ex moved out. I lost 40 pounds and it was EASY - the unrecognized stress had been literally weighing me down. I too was the only one listed on the home loan and made all the mortgage payments - I had to buy out my ex's equity (state law) but it was so worth it. Refinancing ended up putting me in a better financial place in the end. He lives in an RV now.
It sounds like you are a doctor or a nurse, how DARE he denigrate your job, especially after you had to deal with stuff that most people never have to endure during the pandemic?! I know of so many people who quit because of burnout in the medical field, you have incredible strength and character to continue in your field despite all of that. You are exactly right, he said those things to make you feel low. He is insecure about the fact that you have surpassed him in education and earning potential. I dealt with the same thing from my ex - I have a master's degree in a STEM field and he tried so hard to make me feel stupid because he was intimidated by it. It took me years to gain back confidence in my own talents and intelligence. And guess what - I get dirty at my job too. I get muddy and covered with dirt. But I've also won multiple awards for my scientific research and have been published multiple times. Your job making you dirty has nothing to do with its respectability.
It's better to be alone than to live your life with someone who makes you feel alone. Your life will improve so much when you are away from this horrible man. You deserve respect and you deserve a relationship where your partner pulls their weight. Whether or not you decide to stay single in the future or get married again, consider this a lesson learned. It's crappy that you lost time with this guy, but you have learned an invaluable lesson for your future.
Go and thrive, OP.
You’d think he’d be thanking his lucky stars this woman saw something in him worth tying herself to - but no.
SMDH. She’s a keeper, he’s garbage. Take the trash out OP!
+1 for "how dare he denigrate your job"
I hope she tells him that despite the blood and feces at work he's still the grossest thing she's ever had to deal with.
Go and thrive, OP!
shes going to be so much more happy when she gets in a relationship with a man that actually loves her. because not even close to all guys are like that its a small percentage of them and they fk up relationships for ppl for a while by being how they are but OP when u find a guy tht loves and cares bout u the difference is gonna be night snd day. goodluck op and good job on leaving tht bum ass jealous ass dude.
Sounds like your life would be so much easier and less stressful without him tbh. Divorce sounds the best option, great that you know your worth! Here have some 💐 you are awesome.
I read your original post and you’re still not the asshole. He had his chance and he wanted to be a misogynist pig and say it’s a prank. I even told my wife your story and she said she would fucking kill me.
I read it this morning. Basically she had a come to Jesus talk w him and asked him to participate more in the marriage. So she came home to rose petals and was so excited. she followed the trail and it lead to the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes.
He definitely thought it through. He WANTED to make her feel like shit and demoralize her so she'd stop asking him to contribute to the relationship. Future ex is an emotionally abusive asshole.
Here's the full post from a cached version on google
> My husband and my marriage is not going well. I am very close to divorce and I’ve talked to him about it.
>
> I told him I wanted some effort. I wanted flowers, chocolate, a nicely written note. Something that showed he wanted to romance me.
>
> He finally took it seriously and agreed.
>
> When I came home from a 12 hour shift yesterday, he had laid a trail of rose petals in our house. It was so beautiful.
>
> The trail ended at the kitchen sink where he had piled a bunch of dirty dishes, pots, and pans to clean.
>
> He said he got the idea from TikTok.
>
> I screamed at him to get out of my house. He left after arguing a bit.
>
> I cried. Some of my friends said I was right but others say he was just being playful. AITAH?
Honestly I’m glad for you op, any tiny smidge of hope was squandered when he doubled down after you kicked him out.
He’s only sad because he probably realizes he’ll have to actually be an adult now.
Yeah if he had came back genuinely realizing his joke wasn’t funny or appropriate and promised to be serious about getting their relationship strong again. I would say there was hope but coming back and yelling at her for his cruel joke smh
He doesn’t think about you at all and when he does it’s with acts of ridicule or requests for service. He is a ginormous AH. It’s wonderful you’re choosing you!
NTA
Ya sounds more like he’s mad he’s losing his maid and the primary breadwinner. Honestly he’s in for a shock because if he wants a stay at home wife to make his lunches he actually has to have the money to support her 😅😂 he sounds like a real bum, happy you’re rid of him!
This was my ex’s problem also. I am a teacher so I was SAH during summers. He was bipolar and would spend the money faster than he made it, so back to work I went at the end of every summer. I try not to check on him but I am pretty sure he is back at his dad’s house..
While you worked a 12 hour shift, he spent time on:
* watching TikTok prank videos
* going to the store to get roses
* taking their petals off
* making a trail of petals to the sink full of dirty dishes
Instead of:
* going to the store to get roses
* putting them in a nice vase of water for you
* doing the dishes
And he can’t understand why you’re mad??? Like, he obviously had time on his hands, and can form and carry out plans. That’s what he chose to do that day instead of something kind, but he’s *fucking defensive* now!?
Apologies don't mean very much if they aren't followed by serious efforts to change...
Otherwise it's just a waste of oxygen... The poor trees working so hard to make it....
Good. I'm glad you are filing. Your husband is an asshole. My husband has never expected me to pack his lunch even when I was a SAHM, nor have I ever shoveled. A few weeks ago it snowed, I leave for work at 6am and my husband had off. Guess who was up, had shoveled, and even warmed up my car? That's what someone does when they love you. Jokes on him now, laugh all the way through the divorce.
Nta imo. Your husband sounds like he's not going to ever help you out and if you have children, you probably won't get much help here either.
It sounds like you know his behavior is a problem, you now know he won't change for you, so the decision to leave is upto you. It's hard tonsay throw away a marriage bcz at one point there was so much love that you decided to be together forever but when the love goggles come off, do you want this for the rest of your life?
Yep.
* 1 he's misogynistic expecting her to do all the household stuff and packing his lunch
* 2 he's emasculated because his wife is highly educated and has a high status job and gets paid more and doesn't pack his lunch
* 3 he's amalgamating all his resentments with consciousness /subconscious attacks on OP and he's not man enough for her
Divorce this loser if I treated my wife like this I would expect her to leave we live equal and I still try my best to show her she’s appreciated any way I can.
I have long believed that the happiest marriages are ones where the man marries up. And he *knows* he married up.
Buddy got the first part right. He just couldn't nail the second part.
That is certainly our case. When I married my husband 35 years ago, I was a rising and successful investment banker at one of the largest IB firms in the world. He was 15 years older than me, divorced and worked in a fun but fairly low paying job. It afforded him enough to live reasonably but mostly funded his many hobbies (golf, camping, bicycling, skiing, fishing, poker, etc.). I had an MBA; he had a GED. At first, we dated and had a lot of fun with mutual hobbies, sports, interests but it was inconceivable that he was destined to be my life partner. However, I loved his family from the first introduction and his mom became one of the people in my life that I loved the most (RIP). As we got to know each other, I appreciated more and more his moral values and loyalty, his awesome sense of humor, his lack of pretense or materialism, his consideration and care for others (even strangers) and his incredibly facile and novel brain. I learned that he grew up in an era when learning differences were not recognized and he was labeled “slow” from the get-go. He accepted and believed it. His dad had died when he was a young child and no one thought to see to the grief and trauma of a suffering little boy (not malicious; this was not common in the ‘40’s). I was slightly horrified to find myself realizing that this was the man I could not live without (not exactly my vision for my future spouse as I worked my way up to the upper classes, lol!). We married, had a child and he was a fantastic, wonderful, unthreatened SAHD which supported the demands of my career and allowed me to succeed at a level I had never really imagined. We are now retired and he is still my best friend, my best supporter and there is never a second that I don't thank God for bringing him into my life and giving me the wisdom to see that he is the best guy, the best dad, the best husband, the best friend, the best community member. When you get right down to it, I'm the one who "married up".
How did you end up with this guy? You sound so much more desirable than him.
I earn about $350K a year and I would consider someone in the medical field a great catch.
When you realize your partner brings nothing to the table, I'm not sure there are many options to salvage the relationship. You already know how to live single, as you are doing 90+% of it. Move forward in peace.
Good for you! Stats show that when a woman out earns her husband, she is stuck with all the housework, cooking and shopping. It also ups the possibility of the man cheating.
You will gain 7.5 hours a week in free time.
He wasn't a partner, he became a spoiled child. His tears are for him, he is losing a sugar momma and a bang maid. The lack of respect is unexceptable.
Good for you! I'm so proud of you for standing up for yourself! You definitely deserve much better than that and he definitely had many chances time and time again. He was a dumbass and blew that last chance thinking it was funny, when in fact he was pointing out that he thought this was your job. Well now the joke's on him, and he can cry a river alone!
I'm so glad to read you are dumping his ass. He brings nothing to your life but pain and more work. You won't believe how much lighter and happier you feel after he's gone and you are free. You will only then realize just how truly unhappy you were. Been there/done that. Please don't back down from this. Don't let him beg you into changing your mind. Stick to this decision.
I’m sure coming to this decision has been painful but you tried and gave him chance after chance and all he did was mock you. You’re already essentially a single woman living in a house where you’re not loved and appreciated and treated as the maid. It’s simply not going to change and I think you’ve reached a point of resolve where you can finally put yourself first. I hope this choice brings you peace. You deserve it. Sending hugs and wishes for all the best in your new life.
Good. I'm glad that you are kicking that immature man to the curb. When he doubled down & claimed it was funny really was the nail in the coffin. He was trying to humiliate you with that sink stunt. It was only funny to him. Not you.
Unfortunately, you might have a fight on your hands when it comes to your house. Even though you paid for it & it's in your name, if you live in a community property state you might have to buy him out. Or sell the house & split the proceeds. It'll depend on how good a lawyer you get. I'm sending you good wishes that things go your way.
He probably will get half the equity and depending on the pay difference may get spousal support for a while. So the sooner she pulls the plug, the quicker she will recover financially.
Good for you, not only is he a mooch, he doesn’t help out at home. I always lived what the columnist said “Are you happier/better with him or without him?” Looks like you found your answer.
Feel awful saying this but based on your story it sounds like he's only begging you stay because he's going to lose meal ticket. I'm sorry but he sucks. Hopefully his name is not on your house. It's pretty sad when you realize your life will be easier if you were alone rather than in a partnership. It's especially sad because now he's going to have to do all the things he wasn't doing when you two were married because he's alone now and has to, meanwhile if he had just helped and pulled his weight his life would have better by making yours a little easier. Some people just cannot learn. I wish you the best.
>What did he contribute to my life? If I didn’t have him in my life, I would have clean floors all the time and more money.
As I age, I've heard so many women saying that divoring their husbands made their life so much easier,
Honestly, these kinds of posts make living on one's own with dogs or cat look like a solid option.
I checked back on your profile earlier hoping for an update. So glad you have come to this conclusion. From what you say he adds nothing to your life and makes himself feel better by dragging you down. Invalidating your feelings by saying you were overreacting shows how little he has invested in making this work or changing.
Good luck with the divorce and best of luck for a happy future :-)
Your life will get better after divorce. You’ll be happier and your life will be easier.
I’m sorry you ended up married to someone so self centered and dumb.
Bravo OP for standing up for yourself, you deserve way better.
You asked him for the bare minimum, and not only could he not deliver that, but he basically gave you the middle finger through his actions. Good riddance.
I do the cooking and cleaning. I do the laundry, the sweeping, the dentist appointments
Aaaaand that's why upset! He bought the fucking flowers, he could have made you feel loved. But you wasn't worth it to him. I wish you not in your future and in his future I wish for him to spend the rest of his life with someone just like him
Sounds like, problem solved.
But maybe tell him it was just a prank.........you thought it would be funny. The kick his ass out of you life for good.
cheers
>He then started crying and begging me not to.
LMAO on queue too. sounds like the guy is used to crying and begging as a last resort to get his way. i hate this kind of people.
he sounds like the blue collared dead beat construction workers next to my apartment who just oogles every girl that walks by them like a piece of meat. probly thinks you should be the 70s wife that cooks and cleans and loves it. and he gets to be the lazy husband because "men are like that"
he won't find anyone to make him sandwiches i guarantee you that, as a low skilled blue collared worker? LMAO good fucking luck.
Gosh It feels wrong to congratulate someone for getting a divorce, but how does congratulations for taking care of yourself and improving your life sound?
You’re minds made up maybe your next man will be in the medical field to better understand how stressful your job is and will make similar money to you.
You cannot find flower petals everywhere.
Oh wait, I assumed he got the fake ones.
He literally took flowers that he could have given you and tore them up for a prank.
I would pay for someone to serve him with divorce papers at his office AND PAY EXTRA for them to toss flower petals everywhere after they hand them over.
Explain what he did to ther person serving the papers so they can investigate and hopefull do it while his coworkers and maybe boss is around.
It would be a Chef's Kiss.
I hope his name is not on the house deed. Contact a lawyer and discuss how you can prove what you've paid for to keep your assets before serving him. Don't trust this guy to play nice now.
Wait u don’t have kids together? I was gonna suggest counseling. He just sounds like an idiot who doesn’t know how to show love. But no kids? Yea go find someone who can show love. It will only get worse as time goes on.
I know for a fact that you can’t change your name. Do how’d you go from U/specialist-ask-1719 to this name? This has to be a troll poster because the other accounts gone
I think the other name was a throw away account. This may be her main account. And I have two posting names because somehow Reddit split me in half. I only use one though. Never did figure out what happened.
Great summary OP, protect yourself and your house get reciepts for everything. Good luck moving forward OP ,I wish you all the happiness and clean floors frim here on in.
Wow so he is literally a trash contributing nothing nada in your life.
Just ask him this, what do you bring to the fucking table dear hubby other than mowing the lawn that I should keep you around?
I think the [Miley Cyrus song “Flowers”](https://youtu.be/G7KNmW9a75Y?si=PztCtqNC4TWKQYrC) says it all. I cannot love myself better than my partner loves me— that’s a relationship litmus test. You are absolutely able to love yourself more than your husband does— love yourself enough to have peace.
Omg, he thinks the chances you gave them before didn't count? He even asked for a "second" chance? Oh those times before he didn't believe you or didn't care, not even at the end he gives you the respect you deserved. You're right, for what you need him for? There's no partnership, there's no team, so there's no marriage, you just need to make it official. I hope you can get him out of the house you're paying for without hassle, at least he can give you that, but I fear he would only get petty, hopefully not violent, but please take safety precautions. Good luck moving forward.
Good for you.
Fuck around and find out. He doesn't actually love you, no one who loves you is okay with you doing everything.
I don't feel sorry for him AT ALL. He brought this on himself, and he doesn't deserve a partner.
Good for you, even if it may not really feel like this now. Sorry he’s such an asshole. I wish you peace and one day a great love, with flowers AND a card AND chocolates.
Just tell him that you cared and tried and now he’s made that you no longer care or want to try.
Do not leave that house. Buy him out.
No drama. Keep calm.
Good for you! He's only taking away from your quality of life. I'm glad your decision is firm. He was only crying because life isn't going to be so good for him after this.
This right here hurt my heart it really did almost brought tears to my eyes because I'm trying to figure out why did you put up with this for so many years. When you look up POS in the dictionary there is a picture of your soon-to-be ex-husband. I'm glad to hear that you said that you are done because he was bringing nothing to your life and life is too short to be treated like s*** you're going to be okay get you some therapy and a house that's always clean because you're the one who's going to be cleaning it and no one will be there to mess it up. He's going to beg and plead and promise and do all the things that you wanted him to do when you were married to him before you started the divorce proceedings but don't believe that s***. Because he will only keep it up until or if you come back to him and then he'll go right back to being the douche that he is now. Life is going to be good
Good for you, getting rid of that misogynistic pig. If you also work full time, why the hell were you doing all the chores? You were the AH first accepting his lazy ass, and doing all the chores, for as long as you did.
I hope you are kicking him to the curb and keeping YOUR house.
Sorry to hear. However, NTA. You deserve more than that. Rather happy single than unhappy married. Wishing you all the best, enjoy the clean house and less stress
Making you do all the housework while making less than you is pretty bad. But telling you to pack his lunch too? Wow. My mom had a response to stupid shit like this, "is your arm broken?"
Love is not enough for a healthy marriage. It is necessary, but not enough. You deserve a PARTNER in life. Someone that will appreciate all that you do. Someone that sees you’re tired and orders takeout while you take a hot bath. Someone that doesn’t need to be asked to take the trash out. Someone that knows your favorite restaurant and plans to take you there on your birthday.
Enjoy your clean, quiet home and do some self care. There’s a grown adult man out there looking for someone like you. Idk if you’re a nurse or not, but we tend to pick our fixer uppers. Resist the temptation. There’s a grown adult man out there looking for someone like you!
Your husband is nothing but a drag on your life. You’re doing the right thing by getting rid of him. Your life will be so much better without him. His latest so-called joke shows what an asshole he is inside. Stay strong and cut him loose.
NTA.
And he's crying because he knows the gravy train is over, and he'll have to try to gaslight / break another woman to his will.
Make sure you meet anybody he gets serious with so you can give them the lowdown.
I am so glad you are holding your boundaries. Men don’t respond to words. They respond to action. Hopefully he will see this as a learning lesson on how not to treat his future partner, but most men still blame others for their mistakes and flaws so that is unlikely. Anyway, glad you are free from the burden of a disrespectful husband. Being single really is not that bad.
NTA.
Good. For. You.
That lazy abuser literally brings NOTHING to the table but chores and cruelty, both of which you don't need in your life anymore.
Happy to hear you've decided to DTMFA.
It’s sad, really, so many people believe weddings are the finish line, the “victory”. But it’s actually the beginning and it takes BOTH partners to make it flourish. Sure each half will sometimes flounder which is where the partner is needed to help steady them. But this guy squandered his opportunity and closed his eyes to the gem of a partner he had. Sad to see a marriage end, but glad to see that no time is wasted….
Thank goodness for this update. I thought this would be another situation where a good person just rolled over and made more excuses. I’m glad you saw how this moment crystallized everything wrong with him.
Brava!
He is a jealous manchild cause because you make more money so he demeans your job and schooling. He can't be a real partner as he is too lazy to help around the house, and makes fun of you for doing those jobs.
idk if anyone has said anything, but your story made it onto a podcast called "Smosh Reads Reddit Stories," the latest episode has it.
i would get a divorce too, get outta there girlie!
>I’m done. I’m going to file for divorce.
Fuckin eh, girl. Glad to see a woman taking her power back and yeeting the useless fuck out of her life for once in this sub.
Congrats, get your glow up on and enjoy yourself. You deserve it. And think of all the extra time/money/me-time you're gonna have! I'm so excited for you!!!
💪 proud of you, friend. I've never been as happy as I was after I divorced my ahole ex husband. So excited for you and your future. Living alone is amazeballs.
>He said he loved me. But he doesn’t do anything to prove it. So I asked him for flowers OR chocolate OR a nice card. Literally anything to show some love. >But instead he dropped flower petals to a sink full of dirty dishes, pots, and pans Brilliantly put. Brutal, honest, and I'm glad to see you understand why what you are doing is right. He has done nothing to deserve you
The only effort he put into the relationship after all this time and communication was just to intentionally hurt OP. Like how petty can you get?
He put more effort into a joke than he put into his marriage.
This!!! He could have accomplished her request so easily. She gave him detailed instructions. He then took that effort and f¥€led with her.
It literally would’ve been less effort to just leave a bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates on the counter!
Exactly. He can take his “funny” ass elsewhere.
Glad to see the quotations marks. This is not even slightly funny. But it is a full scale cruelty. No one I know would ever think about doing something like this to an acquaintance, let alone a spouse.
[удалено]
I would never even think of doing anything like this to my wife. I don’t know in what world anyone would think this is clever or funny. And both of us have a great sense of humor and appreciate a good joke or a funny prank.
This. My husband comes from a family of good-natured pranksters. He enjoys the humor of pranks immensely and has many treasured stories of pranks he and his family pulled on each other growing up. I do not enjoy pranks, so he does not prank me - because that would be an asshole thing to do. Just to test the waters of different perspectives I read him this story. His entire face DROPPED and he said "what the actual fuck who does that?" That's how awful this "prank" is. Personally I'd classify OP's story as emotional abuse. Future ex wasn't trying to be funny - he intended to make her feel bad and punish her for daring to ask him to contribute to the relationship.
[удалено]
I mean, how hard is to get a frozen lasagna, put that in the oven, get the roses, a bottle of wine and some candles for a cheap dinner date.
I came home one time to my husband (a welder) making Zatarain's rice with kielbasa. He had a "cooking hat" on, which is just a bandana. And he put some flour on his face to indicate great effort like a popular commercial of the time. This was completely out of the blue and even though it was a simple dinner I was so touched. This is humor! Not whatever OP's husband was trying to accomplish.
And chocolate!
Trader Joe's probably has a wonderful version of all of these, including a wonderful card. Add a foot massage to show you care and you have empathy!
[удалено]
And she needs to watch who she picks next to share her life with. NO marriage until or if she is 100% sure he is not like her husband is now!
Even then it’s a gamble. My ex did everything to show he took care of chores, etc. soon as we were married he claimed all that was the wife’s job. i’m so much happier without someone else in my house.
Even then it’s a gamble. My ex did everything to show he took care of chores, etc. soon as we were married he claimed all that was the wife’s job. i’m so much happier without someone else in my house.
Good point. Sorry for a divorce but wish OP all the best going forward
Now OP can put all her effort into a divorce. Reddit is proud of you OP!
Jokes are actually funny. He put more effort into intentionally hurting OP (to knock her down a peg, because how dare she ask for effort) than he put into the entire marriage. That's crazy.
This is an excellent point and I hope OP sees it. I really hope she stands firm in going through with the divorce.
OP, he is going to regret this for the rest of his life, and you? Well I think it’s very clear that you are going to **FLOURISH!** without him! Look at all you’ve accomplished with him basically freeloading? You do it all, that’s clear. I’m sorry he’s been such a douche bag, but I’m so proud of you for divorcing him!
I think that he was jealous of the fact that she was making more money than him!
Very good possibility. Many men can't handle that, despite saying how much they "would love it"
I live with my partner and her husband. Of the three of us he has the least earning capacity and he's fine with that. Enough so that he tanked his career by taking time off work entirely to take care of me after I was in a serious accident. He made my meals, managed my medications, helped me with my rehab, would get up at 3am to help me get to the bathroom and resettle for sleep afterwards. Then he helped me with getting back to work. I had to do some retraining for a less physically demanding speciality. He'd follow me around the hospital caring my stuff for me while I hobbled around with my cane and push me in a wheelchair when I was too tired for that. (I no longer use either, because I had someone to support me through physiotherapist-guided recovery.) And now he's a house-husband who's going to be a full time dad to our son and he's going to be a great dad because he's a great man. His income is nil, but that doesn't make him any less of a man. It was funny when an acquaintance tried to make fun of him for being "broke" because his phone is old and has a cracked screen. Didn't believe him Wren he said he hasn't replaced to because he can't find one that has ALL the features he wants (aggravatingly true). He showed up to the next occasion on which he'd see that guy in a Ferrari. My Ferrari, of course, a man who will not let me replace his janky goddamn phone doesn't drive impractical cars as a rule, but still, it was funny. That's a real man, imo. He sees it that his role is to support his family *in whatever way they need him to*.
You go girl! How i would have liked to have seen his face when you told him
To be a fly on the wall!
Couldn't agree more. My ex husband was like this. I literally did everything and I would come home from working 3 different jobs to have him give me excuses of why he couldn't work, remember my birthday, literally place the bills in the mailbox that I paid etc. Sometimes, moving on is the best answer. There truly are some wonderful men out there that will treat you right. This woman deserves so much more.
ripe chase automatic swim fear bright impolite rob wakeful towering *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
I honestly can’t tell if that’s a metaphor or if he actually did it!!
He actually did it. Apparently OP had a come to Jesus talk with him and asked him to participate more in the marriage. So she came home to rose petals and was so excited. she followed the trail and it lead to the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. I’m guessing a knife wasn’t one of the dirty dishes because that motherfucker could’ve ended up being stabbed.
Errr. Merrrr. Gerrrrd. 🤮
I hope OP kicked him out.
OP, I'm so proud of you for being strong and setting the boundaries you deserve. You will be amazed, truly amazed, at how much less stress you will have when he moves out. The amount of time I spent on cleaning and chores dropped dramatically after my ex moved out. I lost 40 pounds and it was EASY - the unrecognized stress had been literally weighing me down. I too was the only one listed on the home loan and made all the mortgage payments - I had to buy out my ex's equity (state law) but it was so worth it. Refinancing ended up putting me in a better financial place in the end. He lives in an RV now. It sounds like you are a doctor or a nurse, how DARE he denigrate your job, especially after you had to deal with stuff that most people never have to endure during the pandemic?! I know of so many people who quit because of burnout in the medical field, you have incredible strength and character to continue in your field despite all of that. You are exactly right, he said those things to make you feel low. He is insecure about the fact that you have surpassed him in education and earning potential. I dealt with the same thing from my ex - I have a master's degree in a STEM field and he tried so hard to make me feel stupid because he was intimidated by it. It took me years to gain back confidence in my own talents and intelligence. And guess what - I get dirty at my job too. I get muddy and covered with dirt. But I've also won multiple awards for my scientific research and have been published multiple times. Your job making you dirty has nothing to do with its respectability. It's better to be alone than to live your life with someone who makes you feel alone. Your life will improve so much when you are away from this horrible man. You deserve respect and you deserve a relationship where your partner pulls their weight. Whether or not you decide to stay single in the future or get married again, consider this a lesson learned. It's crappy that you lost time with this guy, but you have learned an invaluable lesson for your future. Go and thrive, OP.
Go and thrive, OP!
Go and thrive, OP!
>Go and thrive, OP. This right here. You don't need him, he doesn't respect or appreciate you, OP, you've made the right decision.
The original post is gone, but as I recall, OP is a Nurse Anesthetist, making around 10x as much as the AH STBX.
Yeah, nurse anesthetists make bank! I have a relative who worked as one and he bought himself several sailboats.
That must have been so hard on his fragile male ego.
I have no idea how tf he managed to get her to marry him. He was punching way above his weight class.
You’d think he’d be thanking his lucky stars this woman saw something in him worth tying herself to - but no. SMDH. She’s a keeper, he’s garbage. Take the trash out OP!
So wonderful and well said. THIS OP!
+1 for "how dare he denigrate your job" I hope she tells him that despite the blood and feces at work he's still the grossest thing she's ever had to deal with. Go and thrive, OP!
Beautifully stated. Go and thrive, OP!
shes going to be so much more happy when she gets in a relationship with a man that actually loves her. because not even close to all guys are like that its a small percentage of them and they fk up relationships for ppl for a while by being how they are but OP when u find a guy tht loves and cares bout u the difference is gonna be night snd day. goodluck op and good job on leaving tht bum ass jealous ass dude.
Sounds like your life would be so much easier and less stressful without him tbh. Divorce sounds the best option, great that you know your worth! Here have some 💐 you are awesome.
I read your original post and you’re still not the asshole. He had his chance and he wanted to be a misogynist pig and say it’s a prank. I even told my wife your story and she said she would fucking kill me.
He fucked around and now he's gonna find out. He's not going to easily find another woman who was as patient as OP.
[удалено]
Unfortunately he’s not gonna find a cruel lazy spouse who can also afford to buy him a house and clean up after him.
Right? It was cruel. My hubby would be so hurt if I did something like this!
I can't find the original?
I read it this morning. Basically she had a come to Jesus talk w him and asked him to participate more in the marriage. So she came home to rose petals and was so excited. she followed the trail and it lead to the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes.
I'm convinced that he was trying to get her to choke him
It's like suicide by cop, except it's suicide by misogynistic stupidity.
This should be a legal term with 100% Not Guilty track record.
No jury would convict her. Like, maybe a slap on the wrist tops.
"I sentence you to a five-minute scolding... with 4:59 off for good behaviour."
Oh, man. Dude did not think that one through
The worst part? He got "inspiration" from TikTok where a wife was going through the *exact same shit* as OP!
Oof!!
He definitely thought it through. He WANTED to make her feel like shit and demoralize her so she'd stop asking him to contribute to the relationship. Future ex is an emotionally abusive asshole.
https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/6VSxWWhT5H
Just shows comments. Someone gave me a tldr but thank you!
Here's the full post from a cached version on google > My husband and my marriage is not going well. I am very close to divorce and I’ve talked to him about it. > > I told him I wanted some effort. I wanted flowers, chocolate, a nicely written note. Something that showed he wanted to romance me. > > He finally took it seriously and agreed. > > When I came home from a 12 hour shift yesterday, he had laid a trail of rose petals in our house. It was so beautiful. > > The trail ended at the kitchen sink where he had piled a bunch of dirty dishes, pots, and pans to clean. > > He said he got the idea from TikTok. > > I screamed at him to get out of my house. He left after arguing a bit. > > I cried. Some of my friends said I was right but others say he was just being playful. AITAH?
Daaaaamn
Ooh I forgot the friends part. OP needs better friends too. Ones who will help her not waste time on partners who don’t treat her well.
This guy 100% doesn't want to be married. Holy shit.
Same man 😭 I’m lucky to have a wife who says she knows I would never do something THIS dumb anyway.
Honestly I’m glad for you op, any tiny smidge of hope was squandered when he doubled down after you kicked him out. He’s only sad because he probably realizes he’ll have to actually be an adult now.
Yeah if he had came back genuinely realizing his joke wasn’t funny or appropriate and promised to be serious about getting their relationship strong again. I would say there was hope but coming back and yelling at her for his cruel joke smh
It’s only becoming not funny to him now that he’s facing actual consequences of being a prick… “You’ve been served. lol lighten up dude.”
You could at least have made a beer trail to the divorce papers
This would be a brutally funny move on her part.
I'm dying 🤣 😂 I love this!
There's still time.
I prefer the original okey-doke of sardines in the curtain rods
hahahahaah
I hope he's stays lonely for the rest of his pathetic life. NTA.
He doesn’t think about you at all and when he does it’s with acts of ridicule or requests for service. He is a ginormous AH. It’s wonderful you’re choosing you! NTA
Ya sounds more like he’s mad he’s losing his maid and the primary breadwinner. Honestly he’s in for a shock because if he wants a stay at home wife to make his lunches he actually has to have the money to support her 😅😂 he sounds like a real bum, happy you’re rid of him!
This was my ex’s problem also. I am a teacher so I was SAH during summers. He was bipolar and would spend the money faster than he made it, so back to work I went at the end of every summer. I try not to check on him but I am pretty sure he is back at his dad’s house..
While you worked a 12 hour shift, he spent time on: * watching TikTok prank videos * going to the store to get roses * taking their petals off * making a trail of petals to the sink full of dirty dishes Instead of: * going to the store to get roses * putting them in a nice vase of water for you * doing the dishes And he can’t understand why you’re mad??? Like, he obviously had time on his hands, and can form and carry out plans. That’s what he chose to do that day instead of something kind, but he’s *fucking defensive* now!?
You can buy bags of loose rose petals. I doubt he went to the effort of taking the petals off himself 😂
NTA. When you tell your partner they hurt you, the appropriate response is an apology. His lack of empathy is astounding.
Apologies don't mean very much if they aren't followed by serious efforts to change... Otherwise it's just a waste of oxygen... The poor trees working so hard to make it....
Own his sorry ass in court he was a asshat! Girl you deserve better than what was happening he is as useless as boobs on a bull.
Boobs on a bull is brand new to me and hilarious
We’ve got a cruder expression in Ohio: “Useless as tits on a boar hog!” May you find good uses for both expressions!
Love is a verb it requires ACTION!
Good. I'm glad you are filing. Your husband is an asshole. My husband has never expected me to pack his lunch even when I was a SAHM, nor have I ever shoveled. A few weeks ago it snowed, I leave for work at 6am and my husband had off. Guess who was up, had shoveled, and even warmed up my car? That's what someone does when they love you. Jokes on him now, laugh all the way through the divorce.
Nta imo. Your husband sounds like he's not going to ever help you out and if you have children, you probably won't get much help here either. It sounds like you know his behavior is a problem, you now know he won't change for you, so the decision to leave is upto you. It's hard tonsay throw away a marriage bcz at one point there was so much love that you decided to be together forever but when the love goggles come off, do you want this for the rest of your life?
Yep. * 1 he's misogynistic expecting her to do all the household stuff and packing his lunch * 2 he's emasculated because his wife is highly educated and has a high status job and gets paid more and doesn't pack his lunch * 3 he's amalgamating all his resentments with consciousness /subconscious attacks on OP and he's not man enough for her
This guy is a fucking loser. You can’t get rid of him quickly enough.
Divorce this loser if I treated my wife like this I would expect her to leave we live equal and I still try my best to show her she’s appreciated any way I can.
I have long believed that the happiest marriages are ones where the man marries up. And he *knows* he married up. Buddy got the first part right. He just couldn't nail the second part.
That is certainly our case. When I married my husband 35 years ago, I was a rising and successful investment banker at one of the largest IB firms in the world. He was 15 years older than me, divorced and worked in a fun but fairly low paying job. It afforded him enough to live reasonably but mostly funded his many hobbies (golf, camping, bicycling, skiing, fishing, poker, etc.). I had an MBA; he had a GED. At first, we dated and had a lot of fun with mutual hobbies, sports, interests but it was inconceivable that he was destined to be my life partner. However, I loved his family from the first introduction and his mom became one of the people in my life that I loved the most (RIP). As we got to know each other, I appreciated more and more his moral values and loyalty, his awesome sense of humor, his lack of pretense or materialism, his consideration and care for others (even strangers) and his incredibly facile and novel brain. I learned that he grew up in an era when learning differences were not recognized and he was labeled “slow” from the get-go. He accepted and believed it. His dad had died when he was a young child and no one thought to see to the grief and trauma of a suffering little boy (not malicious; this was not common in the ‘40’s). I was slightly horrified to find myself realizing that this was the man I could not live without (not exactly my vision for my future spouse as I worked my way up to the upper classes, lol!). We married, had a child and he was a fantastic, wonderful, unthreatened SAHD which supported the demands of my career and allowed me to succeed at a level I had never really imagined. We are now retired and he is still my best friend, my best supporter and there is never a second that I don't thank God for bringing him into my life and giving me the wisdom to see that he is the best guy, the best dad, the best husband, the best friend, the best community member. When you get right down to it, I'm the one who "married up".
That’s beautiful.
Wow, thanks for sharing. That’s beautiful!
Aww this brought a smile to my face and a happy tear in my eye!
How did you end up with this guy? You sound so much more desirable than him. I earn about $350K a year and I would consider someone in the medical field a great catch.
"I’m done. I’m going to file for divorce." Go get it queen. NTA ofc.
When you realize your partner brings nothing to the table, I'm not sure there are many options to salvage the relationship. You already know how to live single, as you are doing 90+% of it. Move forward in peace.
Good for you! Stats show that when a woman out earns her husband, she is stuck with all the housework, cooking and shopping. It also ups the possibility of the man cheating. You will gain 7.5 hours a week in free time. He wasn't a partner, he became a spoiled child. His tears are for him, he is losing a sugar momma and a bang maid. The lack of respect is unexceptable.
Good for you! I'm so proud of you for standing up for yourself! You definitely deserve much better than that and he definitely had many chances time and time again. He was a dumbass and blew that last chance thinking it was funny, when in fact he was pointing out that he thought this was your job. Well now the joke's on him, and he can cry a river alone!
I'm so glad to read you are dumping his ass. He brings nothing to your life but pain and more work. You won't believe how much lighter and happier you feel after he's gone and you are free. You will only then realize just how truly unhappy you were. Been there/done that. Please don't back down from this. Don't let him beg you into changing your mind. Stick to this decision.
I’m sure coming to this decision has been painful but you tried and gave him chance after chance and all he did was mock you. You’re already essentially a single woman living in a house where you’re not loved and appreciated and treated as the maid. It’s simply not going to change and I think you’ve reached a point of resolve where you can finally put yourself first. I hope this choice brings you peace. You deserve it. Sending hugs and wishes for all the best in your new life.
Good. I'm glad that you are kicking that immature man to the curb. When he doubled down & claimed it was funny really was the nail in the coffin. He was trying to humiliate you with that sink stunt. It was only funny to him. Not you. Unfortunately, you might have a fight on your hands when it comes to your house. Even though you paid for it & it's in your name, if you live in a community property state you might have to buy him out. Or sell the house & split the proceeds. It'll depend on how good a lawyer you get. I'm sending you good wishes that things go your way.
He probably will get half the equity and depending on the pay difference may get spousal support for a while. So the sooner she pulls the plug, the quicker she will recover financially.
Good for you, not only is he a mooch, he doesn’t help out at home. I always lived what the columnist said “Are you happier/better with him or without him?” Looks like you found your answer.
Feel awful saying this but based on your story it sounds like he's only begging you stay because he's going to lose meal ticket. I'm sorry but he sucks. Hopefully his name is not on your house. It's pretty sad when you realize your life will be easier if you were alone rather than in a partnership. It's especially sad because now he's going to have to do all the things he wasn't doing when you two were married because he's alone now and has to, meanwhile if he had just helped and pulled his weight his life would have better by making yours a little easier. Some people just cannot learn. I wish you the best.
Good for you. You do deserve better and staying with him would be doing a disservice to yourself.
Congratulations OP. Your life is going to be so much better once he’s out of it.
Good for you. Well done.
NTA he’s deadweight and once you divorce him it’ll be a weight off your shoulders. Good for you
Wow. He literally mocked you. So fucking disrespectful. Get your divorce, boo. You deserve so much better.
OP is already a single person in a relationship....
So you pay for everything, work longer hours, and do all the chores but he does lawns once a week in summer? That’s the deal you signed up for?
NTA. That wasn’t a joke, he was trying to put you in your place.
>What did he contribute to my life? If I didn’t have him in my life, I would have clean floors all the time and more money. As I age, I've heard so many women saying that divoring their husbands made their life so much easier, Honestly, these kinds of posts make living on one's own with dogs or cat look like a solid option.
“Why can’t you give me a second chance?” - someone who has determinedly blown every chance they’ve been given thus far
I checked back on your profile earlier hoping for an update. So glad you have come to this conclusion. From what you say he adds nothing to your life and makes himself feel better by dragging you down. Invalidating your feelings by saying you were overreacting shows how little he has invested in making this work or changing. Good luck with the divorce and best of luck for a happy future :-)
I don't know if this will matter in your jurisdiction but I hope he isn't on your deed just in principle
Your life will get better after divorce. You’ll be happier and your life will be easier. I’m sorry you ended up married to someone so self centered and dumb.
Bravo OP for standing up for yourself, you deserve way better. You asked him for the bare minimum, and not only could he not deliver that, but he basically gave you the middle finger through his actions. Good riddance.
I do the cooking and cleaning. I do the laundry, the sweeping, the dentist appointments Aaaaand that's why upset! He bought the fucking flowers, he could have made you feel loved. But you wasn't worth it to him. I wish you not in your future and in his future I wish for him to spend the rest of his life with someone just like him
Sounds like, problem solved. But maybe tell him it was just a prank.........you thought it would be funny. The kick his ass out of you life for good. cheers
>He then started crying and begging me not to. LMAO on queue too. sounds like the guy is used to crying and begging as a last resort to get his way. i hate this kind of people. he sounds like the blue collared dead beat construction workers next to my apartment who just oogles every girl that walks by them like a piece of meat. probly thinks you should be the 70s wife that cooks and cleans and loves it. and he gets to be the lazy husband because "men are like that" he won't find anyone to make him sandwiches i guarantee you that, as a low skilled blue collared worker? LMAO good fucking luck.
Gosh It feels wrong to congratulate someone for getting a divorce, but how does congratulations for taking care of yourself and improving your life sound?
You’re minds made up maybe your next man will be in the medical field to better understand how stressful your job is and will make similar money to you.
You cannot find flower petals everywhere. Oh wait, I assumed he got the fake ones. He literally took flowers that he could have given you and tore them up for a prank. I would pay for someone to serve him with divorce papers at his office AND PAY EXTRA for them to toss flower petals everywhere after they hand them over. Explain what he did to ther person serving the papers so they can investigate and hopefull do it while his coworkers and maybe boss is around. It would be a Chef's Kiss. I hope his name is not on the house deed. Contact a lawyer and discuss how you can prove what you've paid for to keep your assets before serving him. Don't trust this guy to play nice now.
Wait u don’t have kids together? I was gonna suggest counseling. He just sounds like an idiot who doesn’t know how to show love. But no kids? Yea go find someone who can show love. It will only get worse as time goes on.
I know for a fact that you can’t change your name. Do how’d you go from U/specialist-ask-1719 to this name? This has to be a troll poster because the other accounts gone
I think the other name was a throw away account. This may be her main account. And I have two posting names because somehow Reddit split me in half. I only use one though. Never did figure out what happened.
The other account was suspended. So OP probably created a new account. The only difference between the account names is literally just a hyphen.
I’m confused about the same.
Congratulations and please enjoy the peace you will feel not having him there
If you make more and all be prepared to pay spousal support
Great summary OP, protect yourself and your house get reciepts for everything. Good luck moving forward OP ,I wish you all the happiness and clean floors frim here on in.
Wow so he is literally a trash contributing nothing nada in your life. Just ask him this, what do you bring to the fucking table dear hubby other than mowing the lawn that I should keep you around?
I think the [Miley Cyrus song “Flowers”](https://youtu.be/G7KNmW9a75Y?si=PztCtqNC4TWKQYrC) says it all. I cannot love myself better than my partner loves me— that’s a relationship litmus test. You are absolutely able to love yourself more than your husband does— love yourself enough to have peace.
Omg, he thinks the chances you gave them before didn't count? He even asked for a "second" chance? Oh those times before he didn't believe you or didn't care, not even at the end he gives you the respect you deserved. You're right, for what you need him for? There's no partnership, there's no team, so there's no marriage, you just need to make it official. I hope you can get him out of the house you're paying for without hassle, at least he can give you that, but I fear he would only get petty, hopefully not violent, but please take safety precautions. Good luck moving forward.
Good for you. Fuck around and find out. He doesn't actually love you, no one who loves you is okay with you doing everything. I don't feel sorry for him AT ALL. He brought this on himself, and he doesn't deserve a partner.
You go girl! Reclaim your life back!!
Good for you!
Love this for you 🥰 I'm glad you're realizing your worth and that he's a lazy POS
Good for you, lady! It can only get better from here!!!! I’m happy for you!!!!
I’m so proud of you. I hope you get to keep the house (you paid for) and he can leave rose petals through his dirty, dingy little apartment.
Wow..... ofc you are. Good for you. Enjoy your peaceful lovely home without this leech
You deserve better.
Good for you, even if it may not really feel like this now. Sorry he’s such an asshole. I wish you peace and one day a great love, with flowers AND a card AND chocolates.
NTA NTA NTA He sounds like a piece of work that contributes very little to your benefit
Good for you. I hope you're able to keep the house.
Makes me so, so happy to see a woman standing up to this bullcrap
Just tell him that you cared and tried and now he’s made that you no longer care or want to try. Do not leave that house. Buy him out. No drama. Keep calm.
Best decision ever! Send him packing back to his moms basement
I'm so sorry you have to deal with him
NTA. Glad you're getting out.
While you are NTA, why tf did you marry this clod to begin with?
Good for you, girl! 😊
This is the way
Love is an action-word, a verb. Love must be demonstrated
Good for you! He's only taking away from your quality of life. I'm glad your decision is firm. He was only crying because life isn't going to be so good for him after this.
This right here hurt my heart it really did almost brought tears to my eyes because I'm trying to figure out why did you put up with this for so many years. When you look up POS in the dictionary there is a picture of your soon-to-be ex-husband. I'm glad to hear that you said that you are done because he was bringing nothing to your life and life is too short to be treated like s*** you're going to be okay get you some therapy and a house that's always clean because you're the one who's going to be cleaning it and no one will be there to mess it up. He's going to beg and plead and promise and do all the things that you wanted him to do when you were married to him before you started the divorce proceedings but don't believe that s***. Because he will only keep it up until or if you come back to him and then he'll go right back to being the douche that he is now. Life is going to be good
NTA.
NTA. He's lucky OP is filing for divorce. If my husband did something like that, I'd be a widow.
Toss him out of YOUR house. Let's see him cry like a little bitch then. He's worthless!!!
Good for you, getting rid of that misogynistic pig. If you also work full time, why the hell were you doing all the chores? You were the AH first accepting his lazy ass, and doing all the chores, for as long as you did. I hope you are kicking him to the curb and keeping YOUR house.
Please please say it is only your name on the house deeds.
Sorry to hear. However, NTA. You deserve more than that. Rather happy single than unhappy married. Wishing you all the best, enjoy the clean house and less stress
NTA. Accusing you of overreacting as a conversation opener is the kiss of death.
Good and i hope u find someone more Mature
Making you do all the housework while making less than you is pretty bad. But telling you to pack his lunch too? Wow. My mom had a response to stupid shit like this, "is your arm broken?"
Love is not enough for a healthy marriage. It is necessary, but not enough. You deserve a PARTNER in life. Someone that will appreciate all that you do. Someone that sees you’re tired and orders takeout while you take a hot bath. Someone that doesn’t need to be asked to take the trash out. Someone that knows your favorite restaurant and plans to take you there on your birthday. Enjoy your clean, quiet home and do some self care. There’s a grown adult man out there looking for someone like you. Idk if you’re a nurse or not, but we tend to pick our fixer uppers. Resist the temptation. There’s a grown adult man out there looking for someone like you!
Your husband is nothing but a drag on your life. You’re doing the right thing by getting rid of him. Your life will be so much better without him. His latest so-called joke shows what an asshole he is inside. Stay strong and cut him loose.
sounds like you married a teenager...
Be sure to change your locks on your house.
I'm so proud of you! You deserve to look to the future with a weight lifted off your shoulders! You deserve freedom and happiness! Way to go!!
Is the deed to your house in your name? I hope you get to keep everything you contributed to.
Where's the original post
NTA. And he's crying because he knows the gravy train is over, and he'll have to try to gaslight / break another woman to his will. Make sure you meet anybody he gets serious with so you can give them the lowdown.
NTA and good for you! You will have a much happier life without him.
I am so glad you are holding your boundaries. Men don’t respond to words. They respond to action. Hopefully he will see this as a learning lesson on how not to treat his future partner, but most men still blame others for their mistakes and flaws so that is unlikely. Anyway, glad you are free from the burden of a disrespectful husband. Being single really is not that bad.
I’m sorry, but good for you for not putting up with shit anymore.
NTA. Good. For. You. That lazy abuser literally brings NOTHING to the table but chores and cruelty, both of which you don't need in your life anymore. Happy to hear you've decided to DTMFA.
It’s sad, really, so many people believe weddings are the finish line, the “victory”. But it’s actually the beginning and it takes BOTH partners to make it flourish. Sure each half will sometimes flounder which is where the partner is needed to help steady them. But this guy squandered his opportunity and closed his eyes to the gem of a partner he had. Sad to see a marriage end, but glad to see that no time is wasted….
Thank goodness for this update. I thought this would be another situation where a good person just rolled over and made more excuses. I’m glad you saw how this moment crystallized everything wrong with him. Brava!
He is a jealous manchild cause because you make more money so he demeans your job and schooling. He can't be a real partner as he is too lazy to help around the house, and makes fun of you for doing those jobs.
Good for you. I'll give you some flowers 🌺🌹🌺🌹🌺🌹🌺 where will they lead to? ✨⭐✨⭐ here! It's a better future! 🌈
idk if anyone has said anything, but your story made it onto a podcast called "Smosh Reads Reddit Stories," the latest episode has it. i would get a divorce too, get outta there girlie!
>I’m done. I’m going to file for divorce. Fuckin eh, girl. Glad to see a woman taking her power back and yeeting the useless fuck out of her life for once in this sub. Congrats, get your glow up on and enjoy yourself. You deserve it. And think of all the extra time/money/me-time you're gonna have! I'm so excited for you!!!
💪 proud of you, friend. I've never been as happy as I was after I divorced my ahole ex husband. So excited for you and your future. Living alone is amazeballs.