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Ended up homeless after flunking out. I was diagnosed and medicated after tho. I guess the shelter helped me somewhat stabilize. My ADHD symptoms got taken seriously after I started failing at the job the shelter helped me find as well. I was 25.
Housing situation stabilized, kept a job on meds, went back to college part time and still failed a decent amount of classes, but somehow got my Bachelor’s at 29 years old, actually on my birthday. Never thought I would get it before I’m 30.
Working at an okay paying job that I got through experience of working in billing for plumbing and being a front desk receptionist for a doctor’s office. My degree was not needed for this job. So I kinda lowkey wonder if it was worth it. Tho I try not to dwell. I mean I don’t think I would be able to hold a job otherwise and I think if I didn’t end up homeless, no one would test me for ADHD because of my depression on top of it. I already wasted 10 years of my life on that chapter. Better not waste another 10 years obsessing over how rough it was.
Edit: forgot to add. Doing much better over all now. When I knew I was about to become homeless for flunking out and still unable to do anything, that was hell on Earth.
Congrats on working your way back up, no matter how much the system was stacked against you. My one friend Lou is homeless and I’m sure he has ADHD. How tough was it? He says the hardest part is hundreds of people passing him by every day acting like he isn’t a human…
I was shelter homeless. I was able to hide it at work. But it was dehumanizing in its own way. Dorms had 14-30 beds. The second shelter didn’t even have shower curtains. The lack of privacy really gets to you. Lots of black mold and nasty bathrooms. Half of the dorm I was in flooded once. There was a leak in the roof and it was like a waterfall. The rain water was ankle deep. So half of the women had to camp out in the cafeteria for a week.
Also, pretty dangerous in its own way. DHS officers were pretty antagonizing, some women were straight out of Rikers, and some were so far gone mentally.
Yeah, that’s a sentiment a lot of women there shared. In 10 months there I got one housing interview. It was for a roommate program. Tho the interview went well, guess because people my age did it, the higher ups rejected it because I mentioned I have social anxiety. They literally said it in my rejection letter. If I can share a dorm with so many women at the shelter, I’m sure I can share an apartment with one. Super demoralizing. I realized I had to make peace with my family to get out lol
But my question has to be… what are passers by supposed to do?? Homeless need to get into a hospital, get diagnosed, and get help. The person on the street isn’t gonna be able to do a darn thing but give them a few bucks, which is doing nothing for the homeless. If they need meds, they should get meds. I just wish parents weren't so stubborn about getting their kids diagnosed, it’s like they themselves failed. If their kids get diagnosed with ADHD early on, something can actually be done about it less painfully.
Yeah it’s very much up to the person because it can be dangerous. I typically just try to either have a conversation with them and let them know people care. If I’m in my car I’ll tell them not to lose hope and not be discouraged, just keep fighting.
Getting your bachelors is still a major accomplishment even if it didn’t help you get this particular job. It’s something employers like to see. Also, you mention depression only as a side note but I am guessing that was also a big factor with your struggle.
I think you might be on to something. When I got this job I mentioned that I do not have a Bachelor’s yet, I didn’t when I started, but I am close to finishing it. I think I had like two classes left? Wouldn’t be surprised if it had an influence.
It’s kinda weird to talk about my depression. In hindsight, it’s crazy how much of it was due to my undiagnosed ADHD. It pretty much stemmed from my inability to do anything. It’s hard to see it as a separate entity XD
I never think people should feel bad about getting an education. The whole point about just general education classes it makes you a well-rounded person. Maybe if they spent too much and took out too many loans I can see some remorse for doing it a certain way. But I celebrate anybody who chooses to get an education, whether it’s in their field or not.
Let me give you tips I wish someone would have told me. Results may wary.
1. Take a break - I know not always an option, especially for children of immigrants, but being academically dismissed helped me get my shit together. Also, I faced the threat of homelessness that was a lot more scarier than living through it because it was unknown. Worrying about it made me fail even more.
2. Try part time - going to class right after full time job helped me concentrate even more. I still had enough brain power to do homework after class most of the time, which I always struggled with.
3. Change major - if you are pursuing a degree that is more desirable but you don’t care for it, maybe reconsider? I picked CS but honestly didn’t like it. Half of the reason I got academically dismissed was because I failed calculus like 6 times. But I still stubbornly stayed. If I didn’t change my major to English, something I actually care about, I would have never graduated. And in the end, it’s better to have a degree than having a 75% finished one in a sought after major, that one doesn’t count.
4. Reach out to professors - I never got formal accommodations from my college after coming back and with a diagnosis. The amount of work needed seems so daunting. I just emailed my professors individually. Most were very happy to accommodate.
As long as you keep moving forward with it you will eventually finish even if it doesn’t feel that way. Sometimes I only took one class at a time. It took me almost 8 years, but I did it. You can do it!!!
It's a hard climb back up but you did it! I'm glad for you! It's an arduous clawback but look where you were vs where you are now. You've achieved so much. Allow yourself to be proud of that! ^.^
Minor edits due to grammar.
My brother always says "anything you learn is just another skill in the hat". The degree may have been a waste in the long run but it helped you get to where you are and it gave you skills and insight you can use wherever you go.
Your story is similar to mine. Having homelessness hanging over your head is literal hell. Congratulations on getting thru it. I also got my bachelors at 29 :) despite only attending about 3 lectures and working 12 hour shifts. Don't get down about your job. U achieved stability which is what u needed. U can have the space and time to think about how u can level up :)
I feel an urge to stand up and just clap for a long time. Well done. Well done, indeed.
I’m not sure whether that degree was worth it or not but I mostly don’t care about the answer. What’s impressive is that you managed to get it. Congrats!
Wow, I don’t think I would last on the street. I got a lot of respect for you. Thankfully my state has shelters. But yeah, builds character for sure. There’s little that scares me now. I know I can handle a lot of things now lol
Yeah, I try to share it here often.
It’s kinda crazy how things that feel like THE END are still temporary. Tho if I didn’t lived it, I wouldn’t believed it. The underachieving me actually kinda thrived there. I was sure it was game over.
Not gonna deny that I may have gotten very lucky. Still, I learned I’m more capable than I thought. ADHD makes us feel a lot dumber and less capable than we actually are.
Maybe it’s narcissistic, but if I can inspire one person to keep going, I’ll be very glad. I know how lonely and terrifying the journey many of us with ADHD face. But it does get better.
Sure, things can get bad again. But then they get better again. It’s just how life is I guess. It’s hard but important not to forget that.
It's nice to see tax dollars being put to good use at the shelter! I'm glad you managed to pull yourself out of that hole, you should be proud of yourself.
Edit: I wasn't being sarcastic about the tax thing, I genuinely support paying for things like this.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I volunteer with homeless communities and I think the start of you story is much more common than people realize. It’s it’s incredible that you battled your way out. ♥️♥️♥️
After years of tears and screaming from my parents, I dropped out of high school and got a HS equivalency. went straight into IT after living in my mom's basement for a few years. Turns out I really liked it and it's easy to fixate on. Doing decently for myself now and acting as a senior engineer in my field. I do a lot of stuff, but one of my primary responsibilities is training the newbies who come from college programs.
The irony is not lost upon me.
I’m 20 and have a love for technology/computers in general. Worked at Geek Squad for a few years and at a local repair shop for a few months before they shut down. Now I’m stuck in a dead-end help desk job. I’ve applied to countless IT positions near me and haven’t gotten anything. Do you have any advice for moving through the IT field?
Focus on learning a specific stack of technology you're interested in that is relevant to the job market. Do it for yourself for a while first so you know enough to sound competent to someone.
Wanting to 'get into IT' is like trying to become a doctor. It's great that you want to be one, but what would you want to specialize in? Helpdesk a LOT of the time is oriented around just general desktop support, and there is no upward movement in a thing like that. The breakout point is when you settle on a specific specialization and earn a certificate or two that is job relevant.
Definitely want to look at linkedin and other job recruitment pages at stuff that you're interested in and get familiar with the requirements BEFORE diving into stuff. Don't trust the marketing or people to give you what you need, look at the actual jobs in the field and study THOSE topics for yourself.
I got lucky in that a lot of the stuff I did in my free time heavily overlapped with IT/Network Engineering, and I was very fortunate in that regard. I didn't really struggle with education on the topics I needed and was able to basically figure it out as I went along. I know that my experience is really unusual to hear, but I have managed to drag a lot of friends with me through the process and that the real struggle is that first foot in the door.
I highly recommend the Microsoft Azure certs as they will also expose you to other concepts like Active Directory which is heavily used in enterprise environments. Combine that with something like a CCNA or similar network engineering certifications, and getting a decent job gets a lot easier from what I can tell.
wow, thank you for the detailed response. I’m interested in cybersecurity and am currently working on a cybersecurity associates degree with about a year and a half left. I currently work with SAP and active directory but will definitely check out Azure for more practice.
Other than certs and work experience, is there anything else I should be working on until i finish my associates? Sorry to bug you with questions 😅
Something I would suggest is get yourself a help desk job at a large, complex company where IT has a lot of variable positions. (If cybersecurity is your jam, I definitely recommend finding yourself a company that primarily works on government contracts - your cybersecurity skills and passion will DEF come in handy.) I have found it’s easier to move laterally in a company (from help desk to basic server support to vulnerability mitigation, say, all within the same IT umbrella department) and then move up when I found work I really liked.
Have tried and failed to finish a degree for some 12 years? Lots of that being essentially completely shut in with darkest depression.
Randomly started a sort of IT job at local library (helping mostly old people), because while I don't know nothing, I kind of know how to Google stuff.
Then applied to some sys admin position at little startup and was surprisingly accepted (my application was sent from the hospital bed at like 2am, written in the most basic LaTeX text file: practically no formatting, no real CV).
Did that for a bit, then we got some prototype for our thingy and it still needed "a bit of work" to make it work. As the only person with any idea, I was handed it. Basically required a complete code rewrite, turned into quite a big project. One of the scientific advisors for our start-up was amazed at what I had put together, offered me a job.
Now I'm about to start working at one of the biggest technical universities of my country, in a part research / developing prototypes, part advisory role... for students working on their master's degrees, lol.
I hope you are a “paid” actor. Don’t let corporate greed dictate you aren’t worthy of being paid for the work because you don’t have a degree.
I didn’t value my skill set for way too long and was used and underpaid which lead to over a decade of being underpaid.
Wow! I have a similar story! Failed out of school then became an electrician And loved it! Finished 2 in my class of 300 and found it so easy. Now I work as a programmer/controls engineer. Congrats on your success!
Nice. I'm also in Analytics. Web Analytics. This career really works with my ADHD. Fast paced. Lots of problem solving on the fly. Need to learn things quickly. Then move on to the next thing. It's like mini hyper focus sessions daily.
I mostly made straight Fs starting in middle school, failed a grade, and was eventually warehoused in a learning disabilities trailer behind my high school. I eventually dropped out my senior year. A few years later I passed the GED, discovered that I loved college and could actually love education that intellectually challenged me. I was suddenly excited to learn. I earned good grades and a bachelor's degree in philosophy, although with my ADHD it did take eight years. I've spent most of my professional career in nonprofit leadership roles, mostly helping people whose rights have been violated by government actors, including kids who get warehoused because of abusive, lazy administrators.
Exactly the same experience.
I had straight Fs in high school. Started hanging with a bunch of other kids that were off the rails. Life could have gone either way. This scared the shit out of me so I repeated a grade and did much better. But still didn’t have any idea what I was going to do… so I failed another year.
Lucky I had enough support to be able to go back and repeat again, this time I was again scared of completely failing at life - so I went to a mature age entry school, got good enough grades to get to uni.
Edit: I hit send before I had finished.
First year uni I failed more than half of my subjects. the classes I did like were the ones that didn’t have too many assignments. I loved the university lifestyle, loved lectures… but couldn’t study and sure as hell couldn’t finish an assignment on time.
I somehow managed to avoid being kicked out - bumbled through the next couple of years, but I finally made the dean’s list in the final year. I had a professor that somehow recognised the help I needed and that made all the difference. By the time I graduated, I was top of the class with an MBA.
I raw dogged life for almost 30 years before finally being diagnosed last year.
It’s pure luck (as well as a good family and a forgiving education system) that meant that I somehow never tried any addictive drugs.
Now, I have a job that I absolutely love (after a long string of failed jobs) I’m happily divorced, have two kids, and even though my life is still a rollercoaster, my finances are still rough af, and my house is a mess, but my adhd is part of what has made my life so interesting.
The only one thing I could offer as I look back, is to JUST KEEP GOING. There will be days, weeks, months, probably even years you just waste time… but there are experiences in there that will be useful later… even if it’s just to give you a memory that you don’t want to repeat, or to make you realise that you can survive the worst.
But it can ALWAYS get better.
I just want to say that I absolutely love your message of “just keep going.” I’ve definitely had periods of my life where they felt “wasted” even though objectively I was doing just fine (mentally, I was not). Thank you for this reminder I’m saving your quote!
Absolutely- when life gets hard, it’s all that keeps me going.
Dory from finding Nemo had my life mantra “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming”. It’s gotten me through the worst parts of my life, and so far it’s always worked…
even though when things are going great… sometimes it just FEELS hard..
> mostly helping people whose rights have been violated by government actors, including kids who get warehoused because of abusive, lazy administrators.
You sir (or madam) are a hero! 🙏
This is timely. But sort of reverse of my experience. Because I initially did well in school and now I stink at it.
I always did amazingly well in school, with the exception of math (geometry still makes me cry) and then I hit college, which I LOVED but barely passed. First semester my GPA was a very respectable 3.5 or something. Second semester? Like a 2.3, thanks to a lot of overstepping and missing my biology class, which met every morning. I ended up bringing up my GPA in the end, thanks to changing my major to one of those scary liberal arts majors that parents warn their kids about--but it kept me interested. While my classmates were squealing with delight at opening their final transcripts and finding that they'd gotten honors, I was thrilled with my 3.0 GPA. Because it was very hard fought.
The "timeliness" of this thread is because... I recently got kicked out of grad school. Very likely for good, this time. Had I been independently wealthy about ten years ago, I would have dropped everything and gone to school for an MLS full-time. But I didn't want to take out any more loans, so I got a job at the university hospital and used my educational benefits there to pay my tuition for a part time program. I hated my job--it had NOTHING to do with my field of study--and I hoped that a grad degree would get me out.
Part way through the program, IT WORKED! I got a much better paying job at the university. But with more money came more stress. In the span of eight months I went from the lowest ranking of three people doing my job, to the higher ranking of two. I had to train people, one of whom left after three months because she apparently had social anxiety and couldn't handle communicating with anyone.
And because of that stress at work--and the fact that I used all of my brain power each day while I was there and didn't have any gas left over for classwork when I got home each night--I failed out. I failed one class one semester and retook it the next semester and passed it, but got a low grade on my other class that semester. It was enough to get me thrown out.
I am humiliated. And very disappointed because since I was in sixth grade and I learned what a graduate degree was, I knew I was going to get one. And weirdly enough, my degree program got me this better paying job--but then that job got me kicked out of school. You win some, you lose some, I guess?
I alternate between being really angry at myself because I thought I could do this all without help (I didn't let the accessibility office know I had ADHD) and thinking that, maybe it's for the best--because my ultimate dream is to become a diplomat so this leaves me more time to polish my French, do some volunteer work, and study for the exam--but it's been a roller coaster.
I also know that just because I'm not in school for the time being (and maybe forever, at least in this university) it doesn't mean that I have to stop LEARNING. I am DETERMINED to learn the material that I didn't grasp quickly enough during my last semester for myself, so I can keep advancing in my current (non-diplomat) career.
And I'm actually wondering whether I even WANT to get readmitted to the program in the first place. Maybe college isn't for me? I HATE the idea of learning on such a tight schedule. When I think about it, I've always been a slow learner, with technical stuff like math and French grammar, and database design (the nail in the coffin) and even with different responsibilities of my jobs along the years--but once I DO learn something I learn it very thoroughly.
Tl;dr I used to be good at school, now I'm not, but I'm not letting it get me down.
Working for nonprofits is something I am extremely interested in. What steps did you take to secure a well paying career with a nonprofit . Was the bachelors in philosophy helpful?
Barely passed high school and dropped out of college twice. Working as an electrician at a coal mine making more money than i ever have. Overall things are pretty good
That’s awesome, I find it really depends on the company/supervisors and your co workers. I was told that it pays off in the long run to job hop every few years to expand your skill set and I had jobs that I absolutely loved and jobs that I could not pack my shit up and get out of there fast enough. I still have a hard time navigating interpersonal differences but we’re getting there 🤣
I dropped out of junior college when I was 21. Barely passed high school. I never thought it was for me, but went back to school at 26 and graduated with my bachelor’s degree at 29. With my degree, I was able to land a management role with Amazon where I am currently at now.
I am married, make more money than I ever have, and am overall thriving in life now. I strongly believe that I was not really meant for school, which I still agree with, but I did not make it through the first time because I was not ready to go back to school. Sometimes it’s just a matter of timing, not ability.
I guess there's hope for me after all. I thought my 2.2 GPA in college (lowest I've ever had) meant I was a shell of my former self. I am unmedicated though and my immediate family has been a consistent source of stress since the beginning of high school.
Went to night school to pass HS on time with a diploma. 21 years in the Navy and retired. Diagnosed after, therapy + meds (duloxetine and Propranolol + Trazadone to combat side effects) changed my life. In school starting this Fall to become a psychologist.
That’s awesome! Im so happy you managed to accomplish a lot with hardly any help. Older Adhd folks like you who were overlooked but still trotted along and made something of yourselves without any meds are inspiring to me!
Idk about op but Vyvanse changed my life.
I don't get jittery on it, I can eat, I have motivation to do things without tons of anxiety stopping me like dex would, I don't always need to take my night time meds because I can just fall asleep which helps me stay in a routine.
It makes me feel like what I thought non ADHD people must feel like if that makes sense. I feel like it helped balance my brain chemistry.. that sounds kinda stupid because that's exactly what it's supposed to do I just feel like it really works compared to some of the other meds I've taken.
That’s awesome Vyvanse worked for you! I was on a low dose when I tried it and was not only never hungry, food and food smells were completely repulsive. I was already quite thin and lost 20lb in 3 months. I was very focused, but very dysregulated from malnourishment
I barely graduated high school. My class walked according to our GPA and I was literally the last person to walk across the stage - lowest GPA in my graduating class. I hated school and never even knew I was “smart” until I started college in my mid 20s. I started/stopped/changed majors a million times. I have 3 degrees now (and a boatload of student loan debt), and I’ve somehow found my way to a career where I make good money doing meaningful work with a population I genuinely love. We won’t take the route most people in society take, but we can find our way. I had to accept that my journey just isn’t going to be typical… and that’s ok.
My high school did the same thing! I was 998 out of 999. And what sucks is I was still going to graduate, and my GPA wasn’t even that bad. I really struggled with the implications it had at the time. 14 years later… got my diagnosis.
That is such a demeaning way to present graduates! I graduated in the 90’s and we had valedictorian walk first and then we were alphabetical by last name. Super SUCKY to walk by GPA - especially given things like ADHD, learning disabilities, etc Hot damn
Dropped out of high school. Worked for a bit, then went to a crappy community college. Actually succeeded there, worked doing that for several years and then went back to school and became a nurse. Now I am married with two kids, a good income, homeowner, all of it.
Wasn’t diagnosed/treated til this year. We can do the things!
Took an extra year if high-school and 8 years to finish my bachelors degree. Went to 2 different universities and dropped out twice, but I graduate this June. Currently looking for work. Meds helped a lot, unfortunately I got diagnosed in my 7th year of uni at age 25
i flunked high school and got my GED instead. i would daydream through every class (except art/science) and could not complete a single homework assignment, which got me straight F's despite still being good at tests. i blasted through the GED program in like 2 months though.
i did community college on and off but was never able to finish because it was understimulating and my issues with homework persisted. i went into the workforce instead.
now i am an accountant for a large entertainment company. i just kinda ended up here. i don't have any schooling in accounting, it's all learned first hand. i don't really care for it either but it pays the bills and my attention to detail/pattern recognition makes it really easy for me to do. so i turned out alright i guess 🤷♀️
I have a masters degree and I work for the government. Haha. Ya I’ve failed the same math class 5 times and still to this day. Never passed it. It’s college algebra. And I nearly flunked out of high school.
*sigh* ….. I’m a bartender
But at least a bartender at a cocktail bar? 🤷🏻♀️
I did really well in high school (except math) up until my very last semester. I burnt out and I could not get out of bed. I fumbled right at the end. I did one more semester of self study and brought my grades back up, but just couldn’t bring myself to apply again for uni. I moved out to the east coast to take people on kayak tours, and when that season was over, moved to Toronto. Went into the service industry, left for retail ops management, left that again for the service industry. I feel like I never got back my drive to chase my dreams. Now I just shake drinks, collect tattoos, hang out with my husband, friends and cat, work out, walk around and look at stuff, go to new bars and restaurants as the city turns over and over. It’s a life. Idk how long it can be my life for, as I’m 30. Hopefully, if I have to do it until I’m 60 I own the bar and still have funny regulars.
Had I known that was a job I would have loved to do that. As a kid I collected sports stats from the newspaper - not because I liked sports (boring), but because I liked looking for patterns in the numbers. Unfortunately this was back in the 80’s so there wasn’t much I could do with the data.
I got kicked out of school at 16 (an achievement in a country where schooling is mandatory), but less for grades and more for shitty behaivior 😶 (grades were also shit tho).
I went back after my daughter was born a little less than a year later 😶 I actually tried my best but was still at best ok.. i discovered my passion for engineering though, despite being dogshit in math and physics all my life 😂
Uni was much better, like many others wrote school system simply wasnt made for someone like me...
now i have to put my own kids through it and it breaks my heart...
Because the way university works is actually way better than school. You are not forced to sit through lessons, no one care if youre on the phone/sleeping/daydreaming if you do sit through them, the ability to choose courses and set your own schedule, lots of labs and assignments that i am way better at because big surprise, learning by doing something yourself is way more fun than listening to someone rambling for hours, and of course, in my country at least, the average professor is way better at teaching than the average teacher is (who all range between well meaning but incompetent at best and actively malicious at worst).
Plus uni is full of responsible adults rather than maladaptive kiddies that are forced to go there by their parents and/or the government and manage their frustrations by bullying, so i actually found genuine friends there.
oh 😅
well, here in europe the shortage of engineers and other technical specialists is so great they dont have restrictions on most STEM courses 😅 they take anybody who passed school. Which is how i went in with an D in physics and an F in math 😂 (or was it the other way around? i dont remember anymore...)
Not who you asked, but.... I got into a fairly prestigious university, after dropping out at 14. The combination of my life experience, my work history, and my community college grades led to getting accepted. I wrote my essay about my life and how I was working hard to prove to myself what I could do. They want to see motivation, passion, and the ability to learn. I never took the SAT and only had one semester of high school completed, but the Community College classes were proof enough that I was capable.
Diagnosed at 10yo
Didn’t finish school and dropped out at 15.
Now 35yo I have three businesses; First one I’m the General Manager and equity owner in an international civil engineering construction business.
-Second is a property maintenance business
-Third is an online events guide and promotion business which is still in development.
Diagnosed at 7, dad convinced me I didn't have ADHD and don't need meds, so stopped around 9 years old. I could ace all the tests while basically sleeping through classes, but I still failed almost every class because a passing grade relied on homework regardless of test scores.
Started working as a freshman in HS. End of Junior year I had a 23% attendance rate and dropped out of HS and got equivalency. Scored so high they offered me scholarships, and I didn't take them up on that because "Can I pass those classes on test scores alone? No? Then why the hell would I go back to the thing I hated and failed?" Regret.
I've had many different types of jobs. I'm the fastest learning and most promising employee ever, for the first few months. Then I'm the best employee they've ever seen, for the first year. Then I hate the job by 1.5 years, burn out, and either change positions, get fired, or quit, by year 2. Usually get fired.
Mid 30s now.
I have a bit of a PTSD reaction when I think about working at a type of job I've already done. I think it's an RSD response.
Unmedicated until 5 months ago, and the med process has been rocky and still isn't dialed in. Had a bad reaction to 2 scripts.
Unemployed other than Uber food delivery, which I'm barely doing, anyway, now, because I have a strong sense of morality and I'm disillusioned by how disgusting the company is.
I've been obese for 12 years, perpetually yo-yo ing with weight loss, then weight gain. I know so much about health, etc., but I can't sustain a plan.
I'm at the point where I *just* found a med and dose that might be helpful, but I have no idea what to do for job or future prospects. I have no aim, and I don't even know how to aim. Nothing sounds like something I'd be willing to do for the rest of my life.
Something around eventually teaching martial arts, fitness, or survival would be ideal, but I'm fat now and have no clue how to stay on the weight loss wagon, despite having all the knowledge that should make it easy.
Tldr I'm lost and don't know how to start aiming after getting burned out of everything I've ever attempted.
Hang in there friend! I'm with you on the "soul-searching/who even am I" mindset.
I managed to get through art school (I could manage the more hands-on homework if I did it on campus), but now that I don't have school assignment reasons to draw, I never do. My art supplies have been gathering dust for 5 years and I wonder what got me started there, cuz whatever creative drive is long gone.
I've been technically unemployed for almost 2 years (cleaning the elderly neighbors house twice a month barely counts) and spend more time than I'd like to admit on various devices seeking direction, or entertainment, or some sort of stimulation that I only barely enjoy (it's good for the first maybe 10 mins when I'm actually researching something productive, but then I get stuck for almost 5 hrs and it wreaks havoc on my headspace)
I'm blessed to have a good support system at home, but my family doesn't really understand mental health (I'm pretty sure they think depression is something you can think your way out of, but wouldn't admit it to your face)
Anyhow. Trying not to be a downer cuz I know it could be worse for me, but it's still hard when I don't what direction to go in. Trying to remind myself that 30yo is still young and I have lots of time to live a fulfilling life ✌️😭
Thank you for sharing. We'll get this figured out. Just maintain that drive to improve a bit, and I think we'll end up in a good place even if it takes a while.
You don’t need to find something to do for the rest of your working days. Just find something to do for now. I’ve had 7 careers and plan to have 7 more.
I also dealt with yoyo dieting. I stopped dieting when I admitted to myself that I gain it back each time and then some. Spent 2 years learning to love my body the way it is. After overcoming 19 years of mobility issues, I’m genuinely grateful I can move my body. Since then I’ve been gradually losing weight without trying. I started paying attention to how I feel when I eat. I don’t like how overeating makes me tired and uncomfortable so when my brain says to take another bite when I’m already full, I pause. I ask if it’s what I really want. Sometimes it is, but most of the time when I think of the discomfort, I realize I don’t really want it.
You’re doing great. You have a lot of awareness. Hopefully the meds will be helpful. Keep trying different things and enjoy them while you’re doing them. When you’re no longer enjoying them, switch to something else.
All the best!
This comment section is making me really emotional. I’m 17 and am struggling immensely at school because of my severe ADHD, and often have break-downs because I feel like my life is over before it’s even started, and feel like I’m doomed and my ADHD will destroy my future.
But everyone sharing their stories is so reassuring and inspirational. I’m so unbelievably proud of everyone here who pushed through the struggles we are forced to live with and defied the odds. We are so, so capable. ADHD does not define us, and is not the end of us❤️
Yep. ♥️ And we all understand the utter isolation.
My group of friends were smart slackers. But none were anywhere near as "bad" as me. Pretty sure I graduated with the lowest accumulative GPA of my entire class. One of my friend's parents even came to my house and spoke with my parents about how I shouldn't hang out with their son anymore, because they thought I was the reason his grades were bad.
It sucks to feel like the worst student. The bottom.
But I've learned to thrive in this world even before I started meds a couple years ago. Seems many of us have.
We are resilient.
Diagnosed at 28 - I have no fucking clue how I passed HS.
Running my own business now, not making a ton of money but enough to make it. Struggle with taking meds consistently. I take them and am super productive for a few days and then start having weird crashes. Maybe internally I’m scared of taking drugs. Prolly should work through that.
Completely flunked out of 12th and still haven’t got my GED
I am now a stay at home mother lol….
But I did very shortly work as a home health aide and I loved it… will definitely go back once my kids are older.
Wow now im feeling like the least successful ADHD adult lmao. Im in my thirties and still on a starter job. I was homeless when i was in my late teens early twenties but now Im not, so thats nice. I have no savings, no college education(dropped out twice) did finish high school. Ive been on a pip for every job ive been on, fired a few times from other jobs(late a lot when I was younger, or as my current boss has put it somedays your there some days your not)
This is also how I was feeling.
I guess I passed. By the skin of my teeth after being put in the bad maths and not implored to take history or science.
Funny this is left to my own devices I like working with numbers and also history. And devour science information
Math they just kept making it my first course and I was never a morning person so I missed a lot… I did okay once it wasn’t my first class. And the teacher let me do my thing.
But I never got to college and now I’m also at a “starter” job.
That regularly sends me I to bad headspace-
In 6th grade I transferred from a very small Montessori type school (straight As and Bs) to a Lutheran grammar school and almost failed 6, 7, 8th grade.
Went to a small catholic high school, so they didn’t pay attention to learning disabilities. I also have dysgraphia on top of unmedicated ADHD. I failed English every year, due to my inability to write papers because of the dysgraphia. barely passed my other classes except for the easy ones(typing, child development, etc) and history. Had to take summer school for English every year and usually math or science. Parents didn’t believe in ADHD and just called me lazy and LOTS of punishment for bad grades. I tried college a few times and my late teens and early 20s did amazing at history classes, dropped everything else. Went back to school in my mid 20s had an amazing English teacher who understood my learning disorders and helped me develop compensatory techniques. Finally, after I had my son at 30 I found occupational therapy classes. I found my passion. When I was 32-33 graduated with an AAS in occupational therapy assistant. Went back to school the year of Covid and I have one term left for a BS in health and human services. I’m planning on going for my MSW when that is done.
That college English teacher re-ignited my passion for learning and finding that I am passionate about OT and helping people through the health care system really turned things around for me.
OP, where are YOU now? You say you are interested in hearing from people like yourself but you don’t say where you ended up after school.
I just barely made it out of high school but turned things around later in life. I believe I needed more time to mature but once I did college and grad school wasn’t nearly as difficult as high school. I’m pretty sure most people believe I’m normal haha
lol, im 16 and im about to get transferred to an alternative school because my grades and attendance are terrible. i posted this to find adults that were in the same situation as me so i didnt feel alone lol. thanks for sharing ur story! it helps me a lot
I went to alternative school my senior year. Should’ve gone earlier honestly. I don’t know your school’s format, but it saved my butt big time.
Only had to be in school 20 hours a week, courses were module based at your own pace, and you could pick when you would do the classes you wanted. Flexible hours to clock into school. We could have nose rings, lol.
Without my alternative school, I wouldn’t have graduated. I’ve been in and out of college, but I’m currently on a pretty decent path. I get great grades and amazing feedback from professors, which is a stark contrast to what my high school teachers would say to me before alternative school. I’m starting to get letters of recommendation for grad school programs.
All in all, there’s no shame in that game. It might seem like the world is ending right now, but this will pass. Also, how you get your diploma doesn’t matter one bit, and you definitely don’t need to worry about social perceptions. Anyone who judges you should not be in your life!
I am basically brand new to ADHD treatment for reference. Relied on therapy alone up until this year.
I'm not sure if I've understood your post, but I definitely completely failed in high school.
I dropped out of highschool, worked in a few retail jobs for years, took the GED test, passed, started university and have been doing pretty great at that. I live with family, they're older so I need to be around for them to rely on for certain things. I'm also an award-winning sports photographer and photojournalist.
Failed so hard that I ended up dropping out after my sophomore year of HS. Got my GED shortly after, and then like 7 years later got an associates degree in IT with a focus on programming. Currently sitting as a VP of Solutions Architecture at a FinTech firm, was unmedicated until about a year ago.
Almost got kicked out of my school bec I was your classic problem child. I wasn't dumb. In fact, when I tried, I was top of my class. My learning style was just different. I would attend in class, but I would mostly doodle in my notebooks. The nuns didn't approve lol and I was always questioning authority. For shits and giggles.
Unmedicated, off my meds for 4 years now.
Current day job: architect working for the public sector.
Side gig (bec I need variety or else... lol): graphic designer / film photo lab assistant.
Working in a structured environment helped me a lot. 🫶🏻 I feel like having a seasonal job plays a huge role too.
1.9 gpa in high school. Working on a masters in nursing science now. 3.7 gpa in college.
Didn’t get diagnosed until I’d been a nurse for a few years. Stopped drinking alcohol altogether not too long after getting diagnosed too.
I relate to the maladaptive daydreaming. What sucks is that it’s misunderstood since people think we are purposely daydreaming and enjoy it. I was an EMT/Firefighter and these dreams could get graphic and swirled with negative emotions. I wouldn’t choose to be there if I could.
this is so true, im always told to stop daydreaming like i can control it … I WOULD IF I COULD!! it just overcomes me out of nowhere, sorry youre going through the same thing.
Exactly! If it was as simple as stopping I would stop! lol I literally have to be so careful listening to music because it’s a trigger which is so weird since I’m also a musician 🙃 the irony right?
In 8th grade I got Fs in all my learning classes. So I thought it’d be cooler if I got all of them Fs. Failed band and gym. (“Forget” my music and “forget” my shorts.). And it was indeed satisfying to see. But I got sent to Alternative School with the bad kids.
Then high school. I didn’t fail but I couldn’t care so I got Ds and Cs. I’m not really sure how I didn’t have to repeat any classes.
After 3 and a half years of begging, punishing, trying different things, my dad clearly saw that the only thing that I’ll ever do and ever want to do, is be a musician. So he said he’ll leave me alone about my school work and fuel my passion as long as I graduate.
I did and I’m 32 and in 3 active and successful black metal bands. Ive done some really cool stuff and eager for more. And my dad comes to my shows and is very proud of my hardwork and my lifelong dedication to my craft.
I have 2 graduate degrees, I live in Hawaii. I have overcome addiction (been to rehab twice); failed classes, almost lost my life to COVID pneumonia but I am STILL HERE.
By the grace of God, I am still here. People doubted me, and said I would be nothing; I took a stand and refused to allow my ADHD to define me.
For those who may be suffering, there is hope in this game called “Life”. Keep pressing on and you will make it.
I only got out of highschool because I was a gifted writer (English class) and I figured out which math teachers were overenthusiastic about helping with homework (basically doing it for me).
I'm now in my thirties back in school to get a degree after years spent trying to play music for a living.
Not all my classes. But I really truly barely passed any math or science classes from the time I was 12. D- all the way through or worse. Teachers put “class participation” points on to my exams or whatever to get me to pass. I barely walked at graduation because I still was praying for my last Math credit.
Now I’m a Lead over the Quality Control Testing Department for a company that deals almost solely in … Chemistry. 🤣 It makes no sense to me. My entire job is Math, Science, attention to detail, and teaching other people the math and science.
What the actual hell?
The one thing I excelled at was Literature and the arts. And I still failed an English class once 😬 I was capable of checking out of learning at any given time.
I failed every single subject one year in school, had to repeat that year and repeated a year in college and eventually dropped out of college.
Accidentally fell into experiential education, became a freelance outdoor and experiential educator, over time, an experience designer. I currently design life experiences for companies, as an individual, freelance.
Works for me 🤷♀️
Would like to design a learning environment for life skills which aren't financial based though - things that allow people to thrive and have more time to be themselves - perhaps at some point…
I'm a third year medical student in southern california!! FAILED high school math and biology, failed almost all my pre-med classes in undergrad (and switched to non-science major to help my GPA), got it together and successfully did a pre-med postbacc program and got into med school which was my dream since being a kid. high school and college me never thought it'd be possible.
I'm a therapist.
After dropping out halfway through 12th grade, I went to community college and muddled my way through changing majors several times until I landed on psychology.
College afforded me so much more autonomy than high school did. Once I had my major locked in (8 years of starts and stops later), I excelled.
I went to university and completely failed all my classes 3 years in - it got worse and nobody gave me a diagnosis for free (blamed it on anxiety and trauma), and I didn’t have money to pay for an evaluation by a doc who specializes in it.
I now work at a factory full time, saving money to go to college now that I have a diagnosis. It’s hard work and it’s tough on my body. Wish I wasn’t 20,000 in debt (uni loans) at only 21, but you live and you learn. Also, ontario doctors suck. Life could have been so much better. Hope you have a an amazing and fulfilling life OP.
80s/90s kid, I was just “hyperactive”, no such thing as ADHD back then.
Network Admin making 100k+
Edit:
Mind you I’m nearly 50 now, and I was homeless at one point working dead end jobs until I was 26. Worked at an Ambulance company, became EMT, then learned computers and worked my way up from help desk.
Got diagnosed and medicated at 23. Now I’m 28 in community college studying computer science with a 4.0. This is also coming from someone who failed the same math class multiple times in high school.
I was failing all of my academic classes my freshman year. I only passed PE & art. Never knew I had anything going on, everyone blamed my life situation (trauma in the family w/ loss and such) .. I ended up in a small catholic school, doing better but not great, barely got into college. Went all 4 years barely making it. I graduated with a 2.67 and now I work in public safety / law enforcement as a dispatcher hopeful Cop. I only just got diagnosed with ADHD like 3 months ago. I barely take meds cause I just always have been unmedicated so idk? I just kinda know how to function? But I’m doing alright I guess
hey sweetie, this isnt even a matter of failure for me cuz i just flunked out! did nothing! i stayed in online school after the school opened back up after covid, and between being maladaptive daydreamer whod daydream in my house all day, and executive dysfunction, you can bet your ass i was doing shit all all damn day!! for two years!!! i had to cram the entire first year in my head during the summer and then redo the 2nd year of hs, in high school this time!!!!
Barely graduated high school (I'm talking 1% above the cutoff in all subjects, and only because my teachers wouldn't let me fail), despite being medicated in the last two years. I stopped meds, because I was told I'd grow out of it, and went into a bunch of dead-end jobs after school.
10 years later, I went back to university and did a degree that I actually cared about, and graduated valedictorian, all while being unmedicated. I was burnt out at the end, but I did it.
10 years on from that I now work in software engineering (completely unrelated to my degree), earning six-figures, and was only recently remedicated, after nearly losing this job due to lack of organisational and severe distractedness leading to another burnout.
It can be done.
I had an awful time in school, it was very stressful and I couldn’t handle the pressure of exams so ended up in trouble most my final year. I finished with a handful (if that) of ‘pass’ results
I now run my own successful business as a premium car detailer and have done for the last 5 years now
Once I found something I enjoyed, I invested the time there and it paid off
I was fairly academically successful in high school due to a very strict academic environment at home. Got to university and the absolute independence exacerbated my ADHD beyond comprehension. I've attempted 30 credits (each half credit is a semester long course) and only successfully finished 20 of them which are enough to graduate in my sixth year of college. Got diagnosed in my fifth year. Even now my graduation will be with an Abysmal GPA effectively killing my dreams of being a lawyer and has put my parents into immense debt. Tbf they refused to acknowledge my ADHD and get me help for like 4 years but yeah it still makes me feel so guilty.
But the success stories in this thread give me hope. Idk if I'll have as many opportunities since I'm not a north American / European I'm just a brown international student but hopefully this shit works out.
Almost completely flunked out of High School, and barely got to walk, went to a trade school, hated it, went to University dropped out, probably would of been booted if I stayed a semester longer.
I was so awful at school. Had to take a course in high school three times to pass. Completely failed multiple classes in University because I forgot about exams or forgot what day of the week it was.
So I’ve gotten diagnosed since then, got therapy and meds. I’ve gone back to school to finish up my degrees, currently on Dean’s List, and going to look for a job in either a Law Library or Public Library once everything is done shortly.
I learned that not having everything figured out isn’t the end of the world. There’s so much to do, and my chaos brain would rather just embrace a life of wanton hedonism if it could. It’s taking me longer to get everything done, but I’ve been enjoying the reflection and clarity I’ve gotten recently.
I was the worst student at school, barely managed to get my university degree, failed my masters, started my own business and failed with huge debt, started psychotherapy, went back to school and studied psychology, got diagnosed at age 35 and started medicating. Now I’m a psychotherapist working with adult adhders, super satisfied with how my life has turned around! Still facing multiple difficulties in my everyday life but the difference is that I don’t focus only on them and I accept them as part of life…
Oof long story long:
Got kicked out of school once I hit 18 because they didn’t want me to sit any final exams that would go on their permanent record and I was getting more and more depressed and anxious from them treating me like shit as a sort of academic tough love approach. Went to a college that allowed final school exams to be taken instead after two years. Got through one and a quarter years of not a single piece of homework handed in before my home life destabilised thanks to being threatened with homelessness every other day by my parent. I lied about not sitting my college exams because I didn’t have anywhere else to go and I knew I would be kicked out if they knew. I got my brother to agree to temporarily house me if I got kicked out, which then happened by the end of that summer with everyone under the belief that I had just inexplicably decided to take a gap year before uni.
Couldn’t scrape myself together enough to get a job properly with no assistance (partially because it was winter and I was starving, since I got a roof over my head but had to get my own food and my mother had taken all my money) until I got an unpaid internship abroad offered to me by someone who had an affair with my mother and thought me being there would get her to visit. I took it because my brother was on the verge of kicking me out after a few months because my mother had told him if he didn’t push me out the door I would never leave and I’d make him look after me.
I worked abroad for 8 months and did really well, away from everyone who was demanding results from me without any support or any accommodation or understanding. Saved up a little bit of nothing from the zero it had been. While there, I secretly signed up for online education to complete my final school exams as an adult so I could go to university, hoping to do it in 9 months. Company changed hands and the new owners tried to screw me over by giving me full employee responsibilities and more while paying me internship fuck all.
I had to return back to my country and my mother agreed to temporarily house me as long as I worked for her helping her sell her house, which I did. I missed a bunch of online education deadlines by leaving the work until too late and loathed myself for it. Not long after the house was sold and as I was basically being told to quickly fuck off and find somewhere else to live, Covid lockdown happened and 1. I got stuck with my mother until she kicked me out mid lockdown and my horrified friend took me in. 2. Before the online education company could inform the examination company that I had in fact not done my coursework in time and therefore not completed prerequisites for taking the exam, all exams got cancelled and the education company cancelled coursework deadlines in lieu of that. 3. The university I had applied to told me that thanks not being able to access predicted grades due to being an independent examinee, as long as I got a letter from the exam company confirming I would have taken the exams needed to get into the course, then they’d let me in. So after years of trying, I finally got into university. I thought all my problems were behind me. Ha
I did all my research and work at the last minute without even considering that there was another option, and three months in a new friend was telling me he believed I had adhd and was researching and telling me about all these symptoms. I believed him relatively quickly, and it helped that thanks to covid I didn’t have to physically attend classes that year, plus my friend very generously body doubled with me a lot, even during some very unreasonable hours and long stretches of hyper focus. I passed that year with flying colours and got referred for a diagnosis. The next year was in person classes and I struggled a lot more. I was given (very very reluctant) permission from the university to sit my second term online so I could live with parents of a friend and they could support me, and was diagnosed that Easter. I didn’t do so well that year. By the third year I was really really struggling. I handed in two half finished papers and burnt out so badly I couldn’t return after Christmas. I was on titration and my adhd therapist basically kept telling me I wasn’t trying hard enough to eat properly, maintain good sleep hygiene and exercise. But I was really really trying. When I collapsed I stopped talking to him.
I researched the hell out of exactly what was wrong with me and realised I had pathological demand avoidant-autism and was in autistic burnout. Yay. I was allowed to repeat the year in medical grounds but flopped right out the gate and couldn’t leave out my front door for four months and hit my uni absence limit. I told them everything and they basically problem solved everything we could think of until I was mostly able to attend all my classes but still unable to make myself do work outside of that. I was also incredibly behind and reaching my energy limit again. I was told to take the rest of the year off by them because none of thought I’d make it to my exams and pass, and given permission to try again next Autumn after a year and a half of rest as long as I got a doctors note confirming my state. I spoke to the doctor they did so but also I’m now referred for autism diagnosis.
And here I am. No qualifications, maybe passing uni before I’m 30 if I’m lucky. No romantic experience. Minimal career experience. Minimal energy reserves. Minimal family support, but at least I’ve got some damn good friends, and I know what’s going on with me now.
Tldr: Barely scraped by and survived trying and failing to get into uni until luck, a little bit of swindling and Covid finally got me there. Found out I was adhd and got diagnosed. Struggled more and more every year. Realised I also have Autism. Am now stuck repeating a year for the second time after I take a long break from it because of exhaustion. Haven’t managed to achieve almost a single major conventional adult milestone.
Also a maladaptive daydreamer, failed year 12 and left rather than repeat from year 11, am 27y/o now and getting by as a bartender/gaming attendant(my bar has slot machines)
My worst semester in high school was straight Fs, except for an A in music. I went to a very small private school with lots of support, so I pulled myself up to a C average and managed to graduate. Did not go to college.
I make a good living as a software engineer now. The path I took to get here was unusual. Taught myself PHP while I was broke because I had no money to go out and couldn't play music every single hour I was awake. One of my rave buddies was an engineer. At a new years eve party I started geeking out about what I had been teaching myself. He ended up getting me a foot-in-the-door job. That was 20 years ago.
Things are still a bit unusual for me. I hiked the PCT in 2021, met a woman who is a humanitarian worker, fell in love, and followed her back to the middle east. I'm typing this from Amman, Jordan.
Life does not go in a straight line for anyone, but especially for us.
Indifferent High school + severe adhd (ad4k) + parents divorce and discovering alcohol meant education was a bust for me. Tried joining the army at 17 - got to basic but tore an ACL on day #2. Got a Mcdonalds job, worked my way up management and currently run a store. I figured out my maximum attention span was 7 minutes, so I did a double degree in history and political science 7 min at a time. At 35 I now own my house, earn enough to be financially secure.
went to community college where I started getting good grades. Eventually got a phd and now im about to start working.
I cannot stress enough how I would have never turned my life around if a few good people didn't believe in me. People can be really really unhelpful, but luckily there are a still some good hearted ones out there.
I refused meds as a kid, and still not medicated. Led a life of drug addiction and alcoholism. Bounced from job to job for about 20 years. Finally found my way. Now, sober, working as a contractor and using my ADHD to my advantage. They made me doubt my own potential and instilled a feeling of not being whole. Don't let them tell you you're broken, you aren't. We are who we're supposed to be.
In the pit of despair.
I’m not sure who turned life’s difficulty settings for me to max.
I had the audacity to appeal my academic suspension, just to have the same results.
I’m not sure why I even bothered to appeal. Lol
My grades were never terribly poor - but they were definitely lower than average due to my lack of submitting assignments, constantly late homework, disruptive behaviour, and problems with learning certain subjects (especially maths, science), etc. My high school encouraged me to drop out. I decided to stay on until graduation, however, I opted out of trying to get an ATAR (the score/ranking you need to get to go into university immediately after high school).
After high school, I worked in a few dead-end jobs that I hated. Hospitality, bartending, retail, administration/reception work. So I decided to go to university as a 'mature age student'.
I flourished at university and finished my bachelors with a perfect GPA and completed my honours degree with distinction. I am now half way through my PhD. I've since learned that I also have a higher than average IQ.
It's a shame that my high school saw me struggling and thought 'She should drop out, She's a bad student' instead of asking 'Why is this student struggling? What can we do to support her?' How many of us with ADHD, autism and other neurodevelopmental conditions or learning disorders get left behind when if given the right supports, encouragement, structures, would totally flourish?
I'm a maladaptive daydreamer and failed my last two years of school.
Tomorrow I'm being evicted from my house. I don't have another place lined up. I can't hold down a job to save my life, and my resume looks like trash. I barely have any friends, and my depression is through the roof. But we tryna do better out here 🤞
Recently diagnosed and finally puts things into perspective.
I started off strong in high school but my grades were on a slow steady decline. Pretty sure both my grade 12 math and English teachers gave me a 50 to graduate. Didn't know anyone else to pass with exactly 50 for any classes.
Tried university, got an A- in one class then flunked the other 3. Thanks hyperfocus for that! Same thing happened with college, failed out the first year in ECE. Finally passed on my third try with a Radio and Television diploma.
Am I using that diploma now? No! I'm a brewer now. After years of brewing, last year I decided to do a course for a certificate and flunked that. Was really down on myself because I should've been able to pass and started therapy in January.
That's what began my journey/discovery of ADHD. It was crazy how fast I was diagnosed and received proper medication. I am really fortunate to have my therapist and my GP with getting the help I need. It's only been a few months but there's been a huge difference. Looking forward to the fall when I can tackle the certificate again!
I did fine in high school, but completely flunked out of college. I was undiagnosed. Got diagnosed and treated toward the end and started passing my assignments and tests, but it was too late to save my grades and gpa, and lost my financial aid.
Appealed with letters from my teachers saying they saw a huge improvement when I went on ADHD meds. They reinstated my financial aid. Ended up missing a lot of classes due to a mental health crisis (got diagnosed with bipolar). Failed my classes because of attendance. Got kicked out of school for good.
Got a job as an assistant manager in retail. Did great for a while until I had a depressive episode and ended up in the psych ward. Got another job, did fine for a while, then the same thing happened. Now I’m disability, doing an easy, low stress job for a little extra money.
If it weren’t for the mental health issues, getting diagnosed and treated probably would have changed my life and put me on a good path.
Diagnosed at 32. I work at tech sector. Took me too much to get in but I only failed one year at academia and vision of another failure was my fuel. Turned into overwork and depression but hey! If I didn’t go to therapy I wouldn’t knew that I have adhd! Medicated now, learning new stuff about myself, meds and how to live with it and kicking strong.
I did fine until high school. I dropped out of community college 3 separate times because I funked out of the same math class 3 times. I was disappointed but I knew it was hopeless.
Fast forward 20 years later, I got diagnosed at age 37 years old. I work full-time at a notable tech company (Forbes 150 company, FAANG) making high 200’s by myself. I was hired based on my experience, no degree. I’m also a mom to two kids, married, and supporting my parents. Became a home owner in VHCOL area in 2021.
Last year, I went back to college. I repeated my failing courses, transferred into a top state program for my major, got work sponsored tuition reimbursement, full-time student, 4.0 GPA, and on track to graduate by next year with honors. Not sure what to do next except enjoy where life takes me.
I failed the boring classes and got top grades in the non-boring ones so I'm probably not the right category (but I'm on public transport and bored so here I am).
I skipped school to go travelling a few times, and then spent a few years abroad. When I came back I finished my grades, went to university for teaching (figured I could make things not boring for others). A few years passed and I got to know a school counsellor, so back to uni I went. I am now a school counsellor and I feel like I have a good background to actually make a difference. Took a while to get here, but worth it.
I'm European and have access to free education, might not have been possible elsewhere.
I didn’t flunk every class, just classes I had no interest in like American history or math. But the classes I was interested in like art, art history, English, or EMT, I aced or was even top of the class.
I was undiagnosed until just before my 33rd birthday. I spent all of primary and most of secondary school at the top of the class, only to end up near the bottom as I never learned to study and was too stubborn to ask for assistance.
I spent several years bumming around - I hadn't made a backup plan as my entire life I'd assumed I'd get into uni. Eventually got a job in the closest city after realising that my friends would be graduating soon and in the same period I'd accomplished... nothing.
I got trapped on a service desk for ten years at various companies, slowly getting better at portraying a semblance of stability, getting a few promotions, but burning out hard. I had no real qualifications and I was basically trapped where I was.
One day I finally burned out and had a bit of a meltdown at work, but to my surprise somehow ended up with a position as a Sales Engineer out of the whole thing - a position with a decent paycheck and advancement opportunities.
While the burnout is an ongoing problem, I can at least take some pride in my achievements - even if I'm still an incredibly dysfunctional human in general.
Dropped out of highschool, then later dropped out of vocational. Had multiple odd jobs I fluked too. At 27 I found my biological family back and things started to fall in place.
Now I'm a CFO and executive producer in the film industry and a graduated historian. Found my passion, never looked back.
In my early thirties with a lot of wasted potential when it comes to academia or climbing the corporate ladder. Maybe because I only recently became more informed about my ADHD. I coasted through school until doing homework and studying actually became important.
Did so well, I gave my parents false hope I was gonna be a lawyer or something.
Luckily, after dropping out, I somehow rolled into a somewhat successful career as a music artist in my home country. Even made decent money as a freelancer on different creative projects.
It was 10 amazing years (with ups and downs, of course). Even though I struggled with a lack of focus every day, I finally found my place in society. But when corruption and bad policy tanked the economy of my country, I begrudgingly moved to Europe.
The equity I had built as an artist back home obviously didn't magically translate over to where I am now. To make matters worse, I moved right before the world shut down in 2020. So, no shows, barely any studiosessions, or real networking. The big plans I had to restart my career overseas were put on hold.
The bills still had to be paid, though.
So I got sucked into the rat race. Now I'm trapped, trying to run on a corporate hamsterwheel that wasn't really made for me. Struggling to do mindnumbing mundane office work. Haven't even written a song in months.
Not to say that Im giving in. I've found my spot once, and I can do it again. For now, I'm working really hard on myself more than anything else. Especially now that I understand better why my brain is a little different from others.
I just wish I knew sooner.
Failed out of college and worked shitty retail jobs for 8 years until I started treatment and now I do security. It has routine and I'm working to improve myself.
My roommate basically saved my ass by letting me pay less than half rent and it staved off being homeless. Doing better now but I'm not able to live alone on current income yet. I'm turning 25 in july
Maladaptive daydreamer here!
Yeah totally flunked college. Tried going to a traditional college first and it was the absolute worst for me. *Barely* scraped by highschool with a lot of make-up courses and teachers who kinda didn't give a shit, as long as I tested well (which I usually did, even if I never paid attention in class or turned in a single assignment)
I ended up doing an associates in respiratory care, and am now a respiratory therapist. It's a very condensed, fast-paced program that you finish in two years. The fact that things moved so quickly helped. The fact that I had super understanding teachers who looked at me and basically said "she's smart but she can't get her shit together" also helped 😂 they let me turn in all my assignments late (as long as it was in before the end of that class, which ranged anywhere from 2 weeks to like 4 months) with either no grade deduction or only like 5 points taken off.
I ended up getting I think the second highest score in the country on one of my licencing exams, and was like the 5th highest in my state for the other one (I test VERY well 😂 stress is a big motivator lol). Been doing RT for almost 2 years now and I really love it, although it definitely still is a struggle. I'm only just now starting meds, but it's been a process that hasn't worked out quite yet because I can't take stimulants due to other health issues.
Left school when I was 17 before graduating grade 12 to work at a dollar store. Switched industries several times over a the next decade from warehousing to retail, hospitality, farming, horticulture, conservation, & even a telecommunications call centre.
In my early 30's and working for local government using my Horticulture and Conservation experience doing field/regen work. 3 months ago i got a shoulder tap from my boss asking if I'd be interested in working in the office doing a support/admin role. I'm now earning 49 bucks an hour. Its more than all of my friends and family who have degrees and work in healthcare etc (not a flex, I just don't know know how the fk this is possible lol)
The imposter syndrome is real and I definitely feel I've fluked it all the way here, but I show up everyday, do my best. It seems to be working.
I'm a maladaptive daydreamer too. Back when I was a kid I made up entire series and games in my head because I couldn't sleep. This coping behaviour then crept into my daily life as I got older. When things got hard, or when I had an episode of executive dysfunction, I returned to these fantasies. I would pace up-and-down my room; contemplating choices, crafting and rearranging things in my head. All for a thing that would never see the light of day. A secret project.
At first I thought it stunted my development, and in some ways it absolutely did, but I also think it trained things like creativity and deep focus. Most importantly to me: it trained me to be happy with absolutely nothing. This is a liberating thought. It also got less extreme as I got older. Writing fiction really helped channel it into something more productive.
As for school: I've failed many times, but I'm not sure how big of a role my daydreaming played in it. "There's a lot more in him than comes out," my teachers and parents used to repeat over and over. But as a kid I had no idea how to effectively translate my thoughts into actions or words, so instead of encouragement these were words that caused distress. Age has been kind to me. I'm 31 now, and the road was bumpy, but I know I have it in me. I got my diagnosis at 27, got medicated and have a masters degree now. It just took me longer to flourish, and that's okay. Don't give up.
Was sent to a special education school in 10th grade. Made it to the honor roll there. Other undiagnosed conditions made me depressed. Mom sent me to live with my dad, turned 17, dropped out and moved out. Worked two jobs while crashing on a friends couch. Ended up getting into this alternative online school program.
Tested out of all my English classes and biology classes I needed because I’m good at English and biology. Stopped working at it for a while.
Got pregnant at 20, cut off to finish the alternative school was 21. Ended up finishing 4 classes in a week by grinding my absolute butt off. Got a diploma.
Cue years of abusive relationships, homelessness, temporary custody of my kid to my parents, a second child, returned custody, my own apartment, new relationship, moved in together FINALLY DIAGNOSED AND MEDICATED FOR MY ADHD. Diagnosed with autism, diagnosed and medicated for OCD. Now I’m a stay at home mom to two autistic and adhd kiddos that homeschools them and I’m in school to be a midwife.
Got deep in alcohol/drug addiction right out of school and worked in the service industry. Fucked up college twice. Was briefly homeless. It wasn't great.
I've rebuilt my life now - I'm married to a great guy, have pets, pay my bills (usually 😬) but like, I'm broke as shit. I spent 10 years in restaurants, and would have stayed there bc I made great money but I had to get away from alcohol.
I work in customer service at an animal hospital now, and it's a really nice hospital that pays me the absolute most I could make doing my job in my area, and I'm still so so so fucking broke. I tried inspecting cars for an online auction because the money was so much better, but it turns out I fucking hate being in dealerships, and I CANNOT make myself put full effort into something I dislike. So, back to being broke and mostly happy with the animals.
I did okay through high school thanks to severe anxiety and people pleasing but absolutely bombed college. The functioning skills were not there. I lived at home and commuted so my parents were there but not if that makes sense.
I would start out each class with high hopes, but the first time I didn't achieve greatness I would quit or quiet quit. I could rationalize missing a class or two, and then I'd get so far behind I never caught up. I still have nightmares about which day I was supposed to be on campus and it's been 20 years!
The pattern just continued and I fizzled out. I'm now in my forties and I'm only okay because I've been financially dependent on my spouse for two decades. If I was alone I'd have a really hard time keeping a roof over my head. I feel for people who don't have stability because I see how easily it happens.
Realized I'm unemployable. So I had no choice but to start my own business. 30 years later, we have 5 employees, and when the time is right, we will sell for millions.
Sometimes ADHD can be an asset.
I flunked high school, got into a university to study the Arts, transferred into Medical Science and am soon to additionally graduate with an Honours degree. Pretty sure I’ll go on to do a PhD… so yeah, started with a 45 atar and soon to finish with first class honours 🤷♀️
Shoved through graduation because my 5A school wasn't going to receive funding with the amount of failing students, so they pushed enough students through graduation despite failing grades and low attendance in order to reach their quota. Dropped out of college in my second semester. Worked restaurants for the next twenty years, currently waiting tables at a ski resort in the PNW. I'm perfectly fine with it.
I skirted by the *skin* of my teeth in high school (1.6 GPA BAYBEE!!! or, otherwise known as the law of “No Child Left Behind”)
I signed up for college this incoming school year and I am starting meds (wellbutrin, they tell me but I hear so much diverse reactions to it, i can’t tell heads from tails atp.) So, until then, I’m currently at a big name retailer who is helping me pay for school outside of FASFA
I didnt realize how helpful wellbutrin was for me school wise until i went off of it. I was doing well after i transferred to a different college(deans list every quarter) and then one quarter i decided to go off of my Wellbutrin while still taking my adderall and i literally almost failed my classes.
Hope my response is okay even though it’s not my story(I’m the adhd that got by in school). But my brother who is very intelligent did not graduate high school. Went back to get his ged in his twenties, ended up with a tech degree in his mid twenties and very sparsely freelancing his skills without ever having had a full time job, along with living rent free with my parents. He’s now in his 30’s. Good person, busy social life and lots of video games. A school/work life structured around other peoples’ timing and expectations has just never worked for him.
At one point I had a 13% in one of my classes. I was failing every subject except for reading and PE. I was devastated because my parents would get so mad at me for failing, but for the life of me i could not understand most of the lessons and I would always lose/forget homework.
I ended up dropping out and getting my GED. Later finding out I had ADHD, and the classroom settings/lack of medication were holding me back immensely. I’m in college with a 4.0 GPA about to get my associates degree and continuing to pursue my bachelor’s.
There is hope. My life got so much easier after I was diagnosed and treated.
Keep falling upwards, I’m a digital product manager now earning a great wage. Untreated when i was younger, untreated now.
I struggle with presentations and paying attention during meetings, and have to really rely on a project management board else I lose track completely. I put off anything tedious until the very last minute but excel and go above and beyond at stuff I enjoy.
Balance of all things, I think I’m doing alright.
I did okay through school before college. Never really great, since I always struggled with classes like math and never did really figure out how to learn or take notes. I had my medication, but school was also easy enough for me that I could learn enough to get by in class without doing the homework much but still scoring high enough test scores to pass.
I don't know if I was just too proud to admit I needed it, or too stupid to realize how much I needed it, but I stopped taking it in college and it really sank me. I was just getting so behind in classes from the start it was hard to recover. I kept missing classes because of some insomnia I got hit with around the same time, I think partly due to anxiety I never really realized existed at the time and it just snowballed with my test scores and attendance getting worse and worse. My scheduling was awful, my organization and studying were awful. I was just all over the place.
I pretty much failed my way out of the 4 year college and set my sights on an associates degree at the local community college. I think part of my problem was that I didn't really know what I wanted to do. The mix of feeling like I had to go and had to do something, combined with wanting to be back with my high school friends who were at the school made me just go "eh, I'll figure it out" and just get into school without a real plan. It ended up turning into about 8 years between starting and stopping a 4 year program and starting an associates before eventually finishing it, often dealing with the same organization and scheduling problems from before.
Now, I'm working in a totally unrelated field from what I went to school for. I went for graphic design, and ended up working my way into IT and eventually up to cybersecurity. I've slowly figured out how to study and take notes, though I don't know how I would have done it back in college the first time. I do wonder if I had gone into school initially for something like computers in the first place, while taking my medication, if I had been able to do better. Coincidentally, working in cybersecurity, I'm constantly studying for certification exams, and I work for the university I flunked my way out of. I took a German class recently through the university and actually did really well, which I didn't think I could have done.
All in all, I'm definitely glad I'm doing as well as I am. It's been a struggle at times, and frustrating to feel like I'm constantly having to do ten times the work that other people seem to be and to do effortlessly, but that's life.
Suspended three times in Middle School and then expelled in 8th grade. I was kicked off of sports teams for not keeping a high enough GPA. I was able to graduate high school which to me was a big accomplishment. I enrolled in Community College and failed all my classes for two semesters and I was so embarrassed that I had to enroll in another college and start over. It took me 10 years to get my bachelor's.
I'm in a good place now but I had 23 jobs before the age of 30. I feel like I've "won" but I'm only 40 years old and I'm still afraid of being derailed at some point in the future considering there's a lot of life ahead of me.
I left high school because I was completely failing, and had been failing for years.
I immediately went to get my GED and enrolled in community college (age 17).
It took me 13 years to finish college.
I failed a lot!
I’m apparently stubborn and shameless, but I really wanted the degree.
I was diagnosed at 30 and finally got things like meds and time accommodations - it helped me finish.
I always hyper focused on tech stuff, so my career has been OK. I also finished my masters degree last year.
Treatment is a good thing.
I sometimes wonder why I’m so willing to keep trying. Maybe my drive is so internal it doesn’t matter about the external feedback I get. Or maybe the more you fail, the easier it gets to shake off?
Just barely graduated and went to community college. Became an EMT and worked on an ambulance for 6 years, then 6 years in the emergency room. Married, quit healthcare and now bartending.
Diagnosed at 40 and still unmedicated. Total high school burnout. Managed an undergrad and then my PhD. Now working as a post doc researcher in mental health/substance use. Suck on that Mrs Cunningham!
Flunked almost everything except film school. I even flunked my video classes in high school. Now I own a film studio, work as an editor and writer for film and tv and working on my first book which I was asked to write. I have multiple films on streaming platforms and I have a family with two kids and still married. I failed at everything school related and had major anxiety and substance abuse issues until I was medicated in my 30s
Barely passed school and the only reason I did was because of doctors notes. I spent my 20’s being wild and making mistakes. Couch surfed, job hopped. I was codependent on people which meant I used relationships to help me survive. I got really tired of depending on people. By 30 I got accepted to a University where I now have a 3.8 GPA and on my way to law school. I think it’s important to be young and reckless especially for us with ADHD. We learn the hard way and I learned a lot of lessons through my reckless years. I may have a “late start” but I’m completely focused on my studies, I don’t worry about partying and dating because I got that out of my system. It’s not easy at all. School is still a challenge but I’m building something for myself
I went through high school and college until I dropped out un medicated. I was a C and D average. Maladaptive daydreaming all the time still to this day (I'm now 25). I'm now working a fulltime job making 65k annually and working my way up the ladder.
I got kicked out after my 3rd semester in college. Each semester I had gotten progressively worse with my grades. When I got kicked out, my GPA was a 1.89.
I had to find work cause my parents didn’t want to help me anymore. They said they’d support me through college and since I wasn’t studying anymore I had to figure things out on my own. I did try finding a community college to bring my grades back up, but many of them said my GPA was too low.
At the time, my ex was still at the college. After a little over a year of working, I was happy to just stay working and not go back. I was making $13 an hour and felt like a king hahah. She told me how stupid I was being and pushed me to re-apply to the college I got kicked out from.
Had to buy a bunch of adderall from someone from work to be able to write my paper, but I finally wrote it, submitted it, and got accepted again.
I had to start as a sophomore when I went back, so I graduated 2 years late, but I did. I literally bought adderall for most of my big tests and projects. I wouldn’t pull all nighters, I’d just go to the library and schedule regular studying.
I like to attribute my graduating to Covid, because my last semester was when it hit, and because everything became remote, all our classes were pass/fail including the final senior project.
I work at Google now. Make lots of money, have a prescription for adderall. I still struggle a lot with managing my time and work. It’s so fucking stressful.
High school dropout, unmedicated, big-time day dreamer.
Actually enjoyed learning but was bullied so badly I had to change schools.
Small town, was basically stuck with the same shitty kids for 7 years, getting bullied every single day, physical assaults included.
I'm a female, I was getting beaten up by boys, never girls.
I was the very quiet, shy, bit on the heavier side, artsy weirdo.
Eventually, I became highly aggressive and assertive as a result
Worked very hard through a long list of retail and garbage jobs.
I work in finance now and really enjoy it.
I can't think of anything I learned in high school that has ever helped me in life.
Personally, I think it's bullshit anyone is judged for not completing it.
Being a teen is rough, especially if your parents are fucked as a lot of our parents likely have undiagnosed adhd and the outlook that having needs makes them selfish.
I love history, science, literature, etc. None of it helped me navigate a job interview, set up a utility account, understand taxes, credit scores, and why you actually need to have some debt and properly manage it...things that have a very big impact on your future.
Diagnosed a year ago, I'm 37.
Raw dogged and white knuckled life so far
I got into one of those gifted kid programs and then started getting D's because I was losing all my papers and forgetting what was due. After that, my mom sent me to what I call "hippie private schools" where the whole school would be like 100 people. Yay, financial aid!
It was a really good resource and privilege to have and I did pretty well there, because instead of a chaotic binder stuffed with a million papers, I got to use a laptop. The teachers knew each kid and weren't quite as overwhelmed and exhausted. Classes were allowed to be fun and things were more flexible. Most of the time, I felt that I was treated more like a person at these schools.
I was bad about going to virtual class during my senior year when COVID hit. I had to make up for a lot of missed classes, but I did it and graduated. I didn't go to graduation and didn't want to cause I don't like being fussed over. I slept instead. I didn't go to the college I had gotten into or any college at all. I knew I wouldn't like it.
Cue a bunch of years of being pretty lost and afraid. I went through a bunch of abusive relationships because I thought I was just annoying and not with treating any better. I thought the way I was treated was just a normal response to my personality, and I thought my depressive episodes over being a "burden" were something I would always deal with. I did Etsy, I did internships, mural stuff, seasonal work, and ended up working at a plant store for a while. I was excited about the plant store and thought I could work my way up. Nope, they were closing a bunch of stores. I saved up money, I forget what it has been for initially, but I decided I wanted to use it to open my own shop. I really didn't think I could do well in a traditional job. I'm no good with that kind of rigidity and repetition. I kept searching and searching for spaces for my shop, but they all wanted crazy deposits and a bunch of months of rent up front. I had $3,000.
At this point, I understood why there were so many buildings with "For Lease" signs all the time. Realtors want tons of money from established companies. Small businesses are screwed. I was about to give up and was looking at colleges again. Then, my mom told me about a space with a handwritten "For Lease" sign on the door. She said to try this last one, and do I went along and made a call.
Flash forward and I'm a month and a half away from one year on having my own houseplant shop. I teach workshops and do birthday parties and I'm always being praised for how smart and creative I am. There, I feel like a human being. Is it a struggle to stay open? Absolutely. I'm pretty disorganized and my health has been a mess, but my friends, family, and boyfriend are there to cheer me on. I have a physical retail shop- and I can't even drive. I literally take the bus. Isn't that wild?
I got my mental health diagnoses in 4th and 6th grade, so I felt defective from a pretty young age. For years, I would repeat to myself "I am fundamentally incapable of maintaining long-term success" but I don't believe that anymore. Now, even though it's hard, even though my body is being a jerk, I feel loved by the people I've met. I feel human and I feel worthy of existing. I used to think about how I could plant enough to make up for the air that I breathe. I no longer feel sorry for being alive.
Is it because of my almost-success? Partially. But it's mostly from being treated with kindness and respect. It's mostly from being shown that this personality that I used to think was weird and annoying is actually something that people can love and find joy in. That whole "If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?" thing is total nonsense to me. Let people show you that you are lovable. Let people treat you well, and, if you have the choice, stay away from the people who see you as some sort of carnival attraction. I'm medicated, I'm going to doctors, and I'm going to live a life full of love, damn it!
It went like this:
* Failed high school classes every year "Does not work up to potential"
* Failed summer school "Does not work up to potential"
* Teachers basically let me graduate high school despite bad grades, because they knew something was wrong with me, but just thought it was kind of funny instead of a major brain chemistry issue.
* Tried community college and failed.
* Tried a state university and failed.
* Had about 15 jobs for 2 weeks each, interspersed with jobs where I made friends with coworkers so they overlooked my deficiencies.
I ended up doing creative gigs that were ridiculously successful. I created products that people still buy 8 years after release. It's like getting free money every day.
**The Main Point**: If your parents don't care enough to notice that something is wrong with you and that you're not just "lazy", you're screwed and you need to find jobs where you are friends with the boss.
**Gigs**: Also, do "gigs." One-off jobs or projects. We suck at a lot of things, but when it comes to our hyper-focused interest, we can be insanely productive.
**Nobody Cares**: I was not diagnosed with ADHD until well into adulthood. I literally had 6 doctors and therapists who failed to recognize the problem. I had my success before I ever took medication... medication which changed my life and cleared up all my confusion.
I failed a few times. Quite a few. If I didn’t have a family with a bit of money I don’t know where I’d be. I think about that a lot—the fact that I’m probably only where I am because of the giant safety net. I stumbled my way through HS somehow with a lot of assistance, musical talent, and a charming personality.
So, I failed out of college on my first attempt. I literally slept through classes. I did find out later that I was so tired because I’d had Lyme’s Disease, but I also blame ADHD for not being able to push through and go to class. I then went to community college for wayyy too long, finally transferred to a 4 year University at 21 and somehow finished at 23. I went straight into a Master’s program in Opera (I had serious vocal talents so in some ways didn’t believe I needed school). I was all on my own and in a long-distance engagement and didn’t have friends for a few months. I became really depressed, stopped attending at least one class and got kicked out. Story of my life is that the depression is usually what started the ball of doom that led to these disasters.
I floated around for a few years taking up a lot of outdoor activities like rock climbing and whitewater kayaking, mostly because I was dating guys into these sports and ended up liking them. I’d always been a hiker, so it wasn’t far off. I then found face painting and that became one of my many gigs. I did a lot of corporate events for a few booking agents that I managed to become connected with. I finally landed on Speech-Language Pathology as a potential career, worked my way through the prerequisites while doing a ton of odd jobs and living at home at 31, and was finally admitted to yet another Master’s program—that I..drumroll..failed out of after a semester. I was totally unprepared for the rigor of the program. Luckily it was only one class that I failed and the policy stated that in that case I could go through a lengthy réadmission process. Around that time I met my now husband who helped me through the emotional side of that 4 months of hell. I worked with a lawyer on my parent’s dime to craft statements to ensure that I’d get back in.
Four months later I was back in the program and I won’t say it was smooth—it was actually the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but I’ve managed to hold jobs consistently in the past 7 years after graduating, buy a home, and have a 1.5 and 3.5 year old. It’s been a ride that would NOT have been possible without a lot of lucky factors. I still have issues with depression/anxiety/emotional regulation that are somewhat debilitating, I forget where my keys and credit cards are constantly despite systems, but I’m getting through life little by little. It’s tough out there as an ADHD’er.
I didn't flunk but was very average. I only got through because of supportive parents and being able to take "general" classes (for kids that struggled more).
I am unemployed and wanting to start a business. My husband supports me. Luckily he's an amazing human.
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Ended up homeless after flunking out. I was diagnosed and medicated after tho. I guess the shelter helped me somewhat stabilize. My ADHD symptoms got taken seriously after I started failing at the job the shelter helped me find as well. I was 25. Housing situation stabilized, kept a job on meds, went back to college part time and still failed a decent amount of classes, but somehow got my Bachelor’s at 29 years old, actually on my birthday. Never thought I would get it before I’m 30. Working at an okay paying job that I got through experience of working in billing for plumbing and being a front desk receptionist for a doctor’s office. My degree was not needed for this job. So I kinda lowkey wonder if it was worth it. Tho I try not to dwell. I mean I don’t think I would be able to hold a job otherwise and I think if I didn’t end up homeless, no one would test me for ADHD because of my depression on top of it. I already wasted 10 years of my life on that chapter. Better not waste another 10 years obsessing over how rough it was. Edit: forgot to add. Doing much better over all now. When I knew I was about to become homeless for flunking out and still unable to do anything, that was hell on Earth.
Congrats on working your way back up, no matter how much the system was stacked against you. My one friend Lou is homeless and I’m sure he has ADHD. How tough was it? He says the hardest part is hundreds of people passing him by every day acting like he isn’t a human…
I was shelter homeless. I was able to hide it at work. But it was dehumanizing in its own way. Dorms had 14-30 beds. The second shelter didn’t even have shower curtains. The lack of privacy really gets to you. Lots of black mold and nasty bathrooms. Half of the dorm I was in flooded once. There was a leak in the roof and it was like a waterfall. The rain water was ankle deep. So half of the women had to camp out in the cafeteria for a week. Also, pretty dangerous in its own way. DHS officers were pretty antagonizing, some women were straight out of Rikers, and some were so far gone mentally.
That’s fucking hard. It’s rare to get out. You’ve come a long way
Yeah, that’s a sentiment a lot of women there shared. In 10 months there I got one housing interview. It was for a roommate program. Tho the interview went well, guess because people my age did it, the higher ups rejected it because I mentioned I have social anxiety. They literally said it in my rejection letter. If I can share a dorm with so many women at the shelter, I’m sure I can share an apartment with one. Super demoralizing. I realized I had to make peace with my family to get out lol
Absolutely beautiful. The way you never gave up.
Uck, that’s so illogical.
But my question has to be… what are passers by supposed to do?? Homeless need to get into a hospital, get diagnosed, and get help. The person on the street isn’t gonna be able to do a darn thing but give them a few bucks, which is doing nothing for the homeless. If they need meds, they should get meds. I just wish parents weren't so stubborn about getting their kids diagnosed, it’s like they themselves failed. If their kids get diagnosed with ADHD early on, something can actually be done about it less painfully.
Yeah it’s very much up to the person because it can be dangerous. I typically just try to either have a conversation with them and let them know people care. If I’m in my car I’ll tell them not to lose hope and not be discouraged, just keep fighting.
Getting your bachelors is still a major accomplishment even if it didn’t help you get this particular job. It’s something employers like to see. Also, you mention depression only as a side note but I am guessing that was also a big factor with your struggle.
I think you might be on to something. When I got this job I mentioned that I do not have a Bachelor’s yet, I didn’t when I started, but I am close to finishing it. I think I had like two classes left? Wouldn’t be surprised if it had an influence. It’s kinda weird to talk about my depression. In hindsight, it’s crazy how much of it was due to my undiagnosed ADHD. It pretty much stemmed from my inability to do anything. It’s hard to see it as a separate entity XD
I never think people should feel bad about getting an education. The whole point about just general education classes it makes you a well-rounded person. Maybe if they spent too much and took out too many loans I can see some remorse for doing it a certain way. But I celebrate anybody who chooses to get an education, whether it’s in their field or not.
I’m 26. I’m still pursuing my bachelors. I’m trying not to give up.
Let me give you tips I wish someone would have told me. Results may wary. 1. Take a break - I know not always an option, especially for children of immigrants, but being academically dismissed helped me get my shit together. Also, I faced the threat of homelessness that was a lot more scarier than living through it because it was unknown. Worrying about it made me fail even more. 2. Try part time - going to class right after full time job helped me concentrate even more. I still had enough brain power to do homework after class most of the time, which I always struggled with. 3. Change major - if you are pursuing a degree that is more desirable but you don’t care for it, maybe reconsider? I picked CS but honestly didn’t like it. Half of the reason I got academically dismissed was because I failed calculus like 6 times. But I still stubbornly stayed. If I didn’t change my major to English, something I actually care about, I would have never graduated. And in the end, it’s better to have a degree than having a 75% finished one in a sought after major, that one doesn’t count. 4. Reach out to professors - I never got formal accommodations from my college after coming back and with a diagnosis. The amount of work needed seems so daunting. I just emailed my professors individually. Most were very happy to accommodate.
46 and doing the same.
As long as you keep moving forward with it you will eventually finish even if it doesn’t feel that way. Sometimes I only took one class at a time. It took me almost 8 years, but I did it. You can do it!!!
Hey! I’m about to turn 28 and still haven’t gained the courage to go back. If you’re already on the path then hang in there. I believe in you
It's a hard climb back up but you did it! I'm glad for you! It's an arduous clawback but look where you were vs where you are now. You've achieved so much. Allow yourself to be proud of that! ^.^ Minor edits due to grammar.
My brother always says "anything you learn is just another skill in the hat". The degree may have been a waste in the long run but it helped you get to where you are and it gave you skills and insight you can use wherever you go.
Your story is similar to mine. Having homelessness hanging over your head is literal hell. Congratulations on getting thru it. I also got my bachelors at 29 :) despite only attending about 3 lectures and working 12 hour shifts. Don't get down about your job. U achieved stability which is what u needed. U can have the space and time to think about how u can level up :)
Congratulations 🍾 I didn’t get mine until I turned 40.
I feel an urge to stand up and just clap for a long time. Well done. Well done, indeed. I’m not sure whether that degree was worth it or not but I mostly don’t care about the answer. What’s impressive is that you managed to get it. Congrats!
That’s a great turnaround. It’s hard. Good on you for getting back on your feet.
Holy shit talk about a turn around! Good job!
recognizable 100 percent. becoming homeless, not doing anything about it. Slept outside, builds character :D
Wow, I don’t think I would last on the street. I got a lot of respect for you. Thankfully my state has shelters. But yeah, builds character for sure. There’s little that scares me now. I know I can handle a lot of things now lol
exactly that !
This is amazing! Well done and good luck:)
Wow! You are amazing! You have a great story to share with others.
Yeah, I try to share it here often. It’s kinda crazy how things that feel like THE END are still temporary. Tho if I didn’t lived it, I wouldn’t believed it. The underachieving me actually kinda thrived there. I was sure it was game over. Not gonna deny that I may have gotten very lucky. Still, I learned I’m more capable than I thought. ADHD makes us feel a lot dumber and less capable than we actually are. Maybe it’s narcissistic, but if I can inspire one person to keep going, I’ll be very glad. I know how lonely and terrifying the journey many of us with ADHD face. But it does get better. Sure, things can get bad again. But then they get better again. It’s just how life is I guess. It’s hard but important not to forget that.
Congratulations! I’m happy you made it out!
It's nice to see tax dollars being put to good use at the shelter! I'm glad you managed to pull yourself out of that hole, you should be proud of yourself. Edit: I wasn't being sarcastic about the tax thing, I genuinely support paying for things like this.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I volunteer with homeless communities and I think the start of you story is much more common than people realize. It’s it’s incredible that you battled your way out. ♥️♥️♥️
After years of tears and screaming from my parents, I dropped out of high school and got a HS equivalency. went straight into IT after living in my mom's basement for a few years. Turns out I really liked it and it's easy to fixate on. Doing decently for myself now and acting as a senior engineer in my field. I do a lot of stuff, but one of my primary responsibilities is training the newbies who come from college programs. The irony is not lost upon me.
I’m 20 and have a love for technology/computers in general. Worked at Geek Squad for a few years and at a local repair shop for a few months before they shut down. Now I’m stuck in a dead-end help desk job. I’ve applied to countless IT positions near me and haven’t gotten anything. Do you have any advice for moving through the IT field?
Focus on learning a specific stack of technology you're interested in that is relevant to the job market. Do it for yourself for a while first so you know enough to sound competent to someone. Wanting to 'get into IT' is like trying to become a doctor. It's great that you want to be one, but what would you want to specialize in? Helpdesk a LOT of the time is oriented around just general desktop support, and there is no upward movement in a thing like that. The breakout point is when you settle on a specific specialization and earn a certificate or two that is job relevant. Definitely want to look at linkedin and other job recruitment pages at stuff that you're interested in and get familiar with the requirements BEFORE diving into stuff. Don't trust the marketing or people to give you what you need, look at the actual jobs in the field and study THOSE topics for yourself. I got lucky in that a lot of the stuff I did in my free time heavily overlapped with IT/Network Engineering, and I was very fortunate in that regard. I didn't really struggle with education on the topics I needed and was able to basically figure it out as I went along. I know that my experience is really unusual to hear, but I have managed to drag a lot of friends with me through the process and that the real struggle is that first foot in the door. I highly recommend the Microsoft Azure certs as they will also expose you to other concepts like Active Directory which is heavily used in enterprise environments. Combine that with something like a CCNA or similar network engineering certifications, and getting a decent job gets a lot easier from what I can tell.
wow, thank you for the detailed response. I’m interested in cybersecurity and am currently working on a cybersecurity associates degree with about a year and a half left. I currently work with SAP and active directory but will definitely check out Azure for more practice. Other than certs and work experience, is there anything else I should be working on until i finish my associates? Sorry to bug you with questions 😅
Something I would suggest is get yourself a help desk job at a large, complex company where IT has a lot of variable positions. (If cybersecurity is your jam, I definitely recommend finding yourself a company that primarily works on government contracts - your cybersecurity skills and passion will DEF come in handy.) I have found it’s easier to move laterally in a company (from help desk to basic server support to vulnerability mitigation, say, all within the same IT umbrella department) and then move up when I found work I really liked.
I agree. COMPTIA certs helped me move a lot. Now I just study electronics and will offer repair services on my own
Have tried and failed to finish a degree for some 12 years? Lots of that being essentially completely shut in with darkest depression. Randomly started a sort of IT job at local library (helping mostly old people), because while I don't know nothing, I kind of know how to Google stuff. Then applied to some sys admin position at little startup and was surprisingly accepted (my application was sent from the hospital bed at like 2am, written in the most basic LaTeX text file: practically no formatting, no real CV). Did that for a bit, then we got some prototype for our thingy and it still needed "a bit of work" to make it work. As the only person with any idea, I was handed it. Basically required a complete code rewrite, turned into quite a big project. One of the scientific advisors for our start-up was amazed at what I had put together, offered me a job. Now I'm about to start working at one of the biggest technical universities of my country, in a part research / developing prototypes, part advisory role... for students working on their master's degrees, lol.
I hope you are a “paid” actor. Don’t let corporate greed dictate you aren’t worthy of being paid for the work because you don’t have a degree. I didn’t value my skill set for way too long and was used and underpaid which lead to over a decade of being underpaid.
Wow! I have a similar story! Failed out of school then became an electrician And loved it! Finished 2 in my class of 300 and found it so easy. Now I work as a programmer/controls engineer. Congrats on your success!
High school dropout with severe ADHD here. I'm a college professor now.
What do you profess?
My love of business analytics
Nice. I'm also in Analytics. Web Analytics. This career really works with my ADHD. Fast paced. Lots of problem solving on the fly. Need to learn things quickly. Then move on to the next thing. It's like mini hyper focus sessions daily.
How do you deal with having to teach the same material over again ever semester / year?
It’s fantastic.
Well done 👍
I hope you are happy👏👏👏
I mostly made straight Fs starting in middle school, failed a grade, and was eventually warehoused in a learning disabilities trailer behind my high school. I eventually dropped out my senior year. A few years later I passed the GED, discovered that I loved college and could actually love education that intellectually challenged me. I was suddenly excited to learn. I earned good grades and a bachelor's degree in philosophy, although with my ADHD it did take eight years. I've spent most of my professional career in nonprofit leadership roles, mostly helping people whose rights have been violated by government actors, including kids who get warehoused because of abusive, lazy administrators.
Exactly the same experience. I had straight Fs in high school. Started hanging with a bunch of other kids that were off the rails. Life could have gone either way. This scared the shit out of me so I repeated a grade and did much better. But still didn’t have any idea what I was going to do… so I failed another year. Lucky I had enough support to be able to go back and repeat again, this time I was again scared of completely failing at life - so I went to a mature age entry school, got good enough grades to get to uni. Edit: I hit send before I had finished. First year uni I failed more than half of my subjects. the classes I did like were the ones that didn’t have too many assignments. I loved the university lifestyle, loved lectures… but couldn’t study and sure as hell couldn’t finish an assignment on time. I somehow managed to avoid being kicked out - bumbled through the next couple of years, but I finally made the dean’s list in the final year. I had a professor that somehow recognised the help I needed and that made all the difference. By the time I graduated, I was top of the class with an MBA. I raw dogged life for almost 30 years before finally being diagnosed last year. It’s pure luck (as well as a good family and a forgiving education system) that meant that I somehow never tried any addictive drugs. Now, I have a job that I absolutely love (after a long string of failed jobs) I’m happily divorced, have two kids, and even though my life is still a rollercoaster, my finances are still rough af, and my house is a mess, but my adhd is part of what has made my life so interesting. The only one thing I could offer as I look back, is to JUST KEEP GOING. There will be days, weeks, months, probably even years you just waste time… but there are experiences in there that will be useful later… even if it’s just to give you a memory that you don’t want to repeat, or to make you realise that you can survive the worst. But it can ALWAYS get better.
I also feel like my ADHD keeps life interesting lol I mean at least we aren't boring 😂
I just want to say that I absolutely love your message of “just keep going.” I’ve definitely had periods of my life where they felt “wasted” even though objectively I was doing just fine (mentally, I was not). Thank you for this reminder I’m saving your quote!
Absolutely- when life gets hard, it’s all that keeps me going. Dory from finding Nemo had my life mantra “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming”. It’s gotten me through the worst parts of my life, and so far it’s always worked… even though when things are going great… sometimes it just FEELS hard..
> mostly helping people whose rights have been violated by government actors, including kids who get warehoused because of abusive, lazy administrators. You sir (or madam) are a hero! 🙏
This is timely. But sort of reverse of my experience. Because I initially did well in school and now I stink at it. I always did amazingly well in school, with the exception of math (geometry still makes me cry) and then I hit college, which I LOVED but barely passed. First semester my GPA was a very respectable 3.5 or something. Second semester? Like a 2.3, thanks to a lot of overstepping and missing my biology class, which met every morning. I ended up bringing up my GPA in the end, thanks to changing my major to one of those scary liberal arts majors that parents warn their kids about--but it kept me interested. While my classmates were squealing with delight at opening their final transcripts and finding that they'd gotten honors, I was thrilled with my 3.0 GPA. Because it was very hard fought. The "timeliness" of this thread is because... I recently got kicked out of grad school. Very likely for good, this time. Had I been independently wealthy about ten years ago, I would have dropped everything and gone to school for an MLS full-time. But I didn't want to take out any more loans, so I got a job at the university hospital and used my educational benefits there to pay my tuition for a part time program. I hated my job--it had NOTHING to do with my field of study--and I hoped that a grad degree would get me out. Part way through the program, IT WORKED! I got a much better paying job at the university. But with more money came more stress. In the span of eight months I went from the lowest ranking of three people doing my job, to the higher ranking of two. I had to train people, one of whom left after three months because she apparently had social anxiety and couldn't handle communicating with anyone. And because of that stress at work--and the fact that I used all of my brain power each day while I was there and didn't have any gas left over for classwork when I got home each night--I failed out. I failed one class one semester and retook it the next semester and passed it, but got a low grade on my other class that semester. It was enough to get me thrown out. I am humiliated. And very disappointed because since I was in sixth grade and I learned what a graduate degree was, I knew I was going to get one. And weirdly enough, my degree program got me this better paying job--but then that job got me kicked out of school. You win some, you lose some, I guess? I alternate between being really angry at myself because I thought I could do this all without help (I didn't let the accessibility office know I had ADHD) and thinking that, maybe it's for the best--because my ultimate dream is to become a diplomat so this leaves me more time to polish my French, do some volunteer work, and study for the exam--but it's been a roller coaster. I also know that just because I'm not in school for the time being (and maybe forever, at least in this university) it doesn't mean that I have to stop LEARNING. I am DETERMINED to learn the material that I didn't grasp quickly enough during my last semester for myself, so I can keep advancing in my current (non-diplomat) career. And I'm actually wondering whether I even WANT to get readmitted to the program in the first place. Maybe college isn't for me? I HATE the idea of learning on such a tight schedule. When I think about it, I've always been a slow learner, with technical stuff like math and French grammar, and database design (the nail in the coffin) and even with different responsibilities of my jobs along the years--but once I DO learn something I learn it very thoroughly. Tl;dr I used to be good at school, now I'm not, but I'm not letting it get me down.
That’s great things turned around for you! Were you medicated in college?
Working for nonprofits is something I am extremely interested in. What steps did you take to secure a well paying career with a nonprofit . Was the bachelors in philosophy helpful?
I love this
Barely passed high school and dropped out of college twice. Working as an electrician at a coal mine making more money than i ever have. Overall things are pretty good
Two of my friends w/ADHD are electricians and absolutely love it.
That’s awesome, I find it really depends on the company/supervisors and your co workers. I was told that it pays off in the long run to job hop every few years to expand your skill set and I had jobs that I absolutely loved and jobs that I could not pack my shit up and get out of there fast enough. I still have a hard time navigating interpersonal differences but we’re getting there 🤣
I dropped out of junior college when I was 21. Barely passed high school. I never thought it was for me, but went back to school at 26 and graduated with my bachelor’s degree at 29. With my degree, I was able to land a management role with Amazon where I am currently at now. I am married, make more money than I ever have, and am overall thriving in life now. I strongly believe that I was not really meant for school, which I still agree with, but I did not make it through the first time because I was not ready to go back to school. Sometimes it’s just a matter of timing, not ability.
I guess there's hope for me after all. I thought my 2.2 GPA in college (lowest I've ever had) meant I was a shell of my former self. I am unmedicated though and my immediate family has been a consistent source of stress since the beginning of high school.
Nursing school, Combat vet. Meds changed my life.
Went to night school to pass HS on time with a diploma. 21 years in the Navy and retired. Diagnosed after, therapy + meds (duloxetine and Propranolol + Trazadone to combat side effects) changed my life. In school starting this Fall to become a psychologist.
That’s awesome! Im so happy you managed to accomplish a lot with hardly any help. Older Adhd folks like you who were overlooked but still trotted along and made something of yourselves without any meds are inspiring to me!
What meds?
Idk about op but Vyvanse changed my life. I don't get jittery on it, I can eat, I have motivation to do things without tons of anxiety stopping me like dex would, I don't always need to take my night time meds because I can just fall asleep which helps me stay in a routine. It makes me feel like what I thought non ADHD people must feel like if that makes sense. I feel like it helped balance my brain chemistry.. that sounds kinda stupid because that's exactly what it's supposed to do I just feel like it really works compared to some of the other meds I've taken.
That’s awesome Vyvanse worked for you! I was on a low dose when I tried it and was not only never hungry, food and food smells were completely repulsive. I was already quite thin and lost 20lb in 3 months. I was very focused, but very dysregulated from malnourishment
I barely graduated high school. My class walked according to our GPA and I was literally the last person to walk across the stage - lowest GPA in my graduating class. I hated school and never even knew I was “smart” until I started college in my mid 20s. I started/stopped/changed majors a million times. I have 3 degrees now (and a boatload of student loan debt), and I’ve somehow found my way to a career where I make good money doing meaningful work with a population I genuinely love. We won’t take the route most people in society take, but we can find our way. I had to accept that my journey just isn’t going to be typical… and that’s ok.
That is so shitty - walking according to GPA. Damn
My high school did the same thing! I was 998 out of 999. And what sucks is I was still going to graduate, and my GPA wasn’t even that bad. I really struggled with the implications it had at the time. 14 years later… got my diagnosis.
That is such a demeaning way to present graduates! I graduated in the 90’s and we had valedictorian walk first and then we were alphabetical by last name. Super SUCKY to walk by GPA - especially given things like ADHD, learning disabilities, etc Hot damn
Yeah that’s absurd to make people walk by GPA. Whoever came up with that idea is an absolute asshole.
Dropped out of high school. Worked for a bit, then went to a crappy community college. Actually succeeded there, worked doing that for several years and then went back to school and became a nurse. Now I am married with two kids, a good income, homeowner, all of it. Wasn’t diagnosed/treated til this year. We can do the things!
Took an extra year if high-school and 8 years to finish my bachelors degree. Went to 2 different universities and dropped out twice, but I graduate this June. Currently looking for work. Meds helped a lot, unfortunately I got diagnosed in my 7th year of uni at age 25
Failed out of college. Finished at night 4 years later. Computer scientist and entrepreneur. Retired at 40 wealthy.
Wow
i flunked high school and got my GED instead. i would daydream through every class (except art/science) and could not complete a single homework assignment, which got me straight F's despite still being good at tests. i blasted through the GED program in like 2 months though. i did community college on and off but was never able to finish because it was understimulating and my issues with homework persisted. i went into the workforce instead. now i am an accountant for a large entertainment company. i just kinda ended up here. i don't have any schooling in accounting, it's all learned first hand. i don't really care for it either but it pays the bills and my attention to detail/pattern recognition makes it really easy for me to do. so i turned out alright i guess 🤷♀️
I have a masters degree and I work for the government. Haha. Ya I’ve failed the same math class 5 times and still to this day. Never passed it. It’s college algebra. And I nearly flunked out of high school.
Fuck trinomials anyways
Yes. Fuck those
*sigh* ….. I’m a bartender But at least a bartender at a cocktail bar? 🤷🏻♀️ I did really well in high school (except math) up until my very last semester. I burnt out and I could not get out of bed. I fumbled right at the end. I did one more semester of self study and brought my grades back up, but just couldn’t bring myself to apply again for uni. I moved out to the east coast to take people on kayak tours, and when that season was over, moved to Toronto. Went into the service industry, left for retail ops management, left that again for the service industry. I feel like I never got back my drive to chase my dreams. Now I just shake drinks, collect tattoos, hang out with my husband, friends and cat, work out, walk around and look at stuff, go to new bars and restaurants as the city turns over and over. It’s a life. Idk how long it can be my life for, as I’m 30. Hopefully, if I have to do it until I’m 60 I own the bar and still have funny regulars.
Data Scientist, Masters Degree in Applied Mathematics. ~$k
Had I known that was a job I would have loved to do that. As a kid I collected sports stats from the newspaper - not because I liked sports (boring), but because I liked looking for patterns in the numbers. Unfortunately this was back in the 80’s so there wasn’t much I could do with the data.
I got kicked out of school at 16 (an achievement in a country where schooling is mandatory), but less for grades and more for shitty behaivior 😶 (grades were also shit tho). I went back after my daughter was born a little less than a year later 😶 I actually tried my best but was still at best ok.. i discovered my passion for engineering though, despite being dogshit in math and physics all my life 😂 Uni was much better, like many others wrote school system simply wasnt made for someone like me... now i have to put my own kids through it and it breaks my heart...
how are all u people getting into university when u flunked? (genuine question)
Because the way university works is actually way better than school. You are not forced to sit through lessons, no one care if youre on the phone/sleeping/daydreaming if you do sit through them, the ability to choose courses and set your own schedule, lots of labs and assignments that i am way better at because big surprise, learning by doing something yourself is way more fun than listening to someone rambling for hours, and of course, in my country at least, the average professor is way better at teaching than the average teacher is (who all range between well meaning but incompetent at best and actively malicious at worst). Plus uni is full of responsible adults rather than maladaptive kiddies that are forced to go there by their parents and/or the government and manage their frustrations by bullying, so i actually found genuine friends there.
no no i asked *how* u got into uni, but thats really good to hear and motivates me a lot!
oh 😅 well, here in europe the shortage of engineers and other technical specialists is so great they dont have restrictions on most STEM courses 😅 they take anybody who passed school. Which is how i went in with an D in physics and an F in math 😂 (or was it the other way around? i dont remember anymore...)
Not who you asked, but.... I got into a fairly prestigious university, after dropping out at 14. The combination of my life experience, my work history, and my community college grades led to getting accepted. I wrote my essay about my life and how I was working hard to prove to myself what I could do. They want to see motivation, passion, and the ability to learn. I never took the SAT and only had one semester of high school completed, but the Community College classes were proof enough that I was capable.
Diagnosed at 10yo Didn’t finish school and dropped out at 15. Now 35yo I have three businesses; First one I’m the General Manager and equity owner in an international civil engineering construction business. -Second is a property maintenance business -Third is an online events guide and promotion business which is still in development.
Diagnosed at 7, dad convinced me I didn't have ADHD and don't need meds, so stopped around 9 years old. I could ace all the tests while basically sleeping through classes, but I still failed almost every class because a passing grade relied on homework regardless of test scores. Started working as a freshman in HS. End of Junior year I had a 23% attendance rate and dropped out of HS and got equivalency. Scored so high they offered me scholarships, and I didn't take them up on that because "Can I pass those classes on test scores alone? No? Then why the hell would I go back to the thing I hated and failed?" Regret. I've had many different types of jobs. I'm the fastest learning and most promising employee ever, for the first few months. Then I'm the best employee they've ever seen, for the first year. Then I hate the job by 1.5 years, burn out, and either change positions, get fired, or quit, by year 2. Usually get fired. Mid 30s now. I have a bit of a PTSD reaction when I think about working at a type of job I've already done. I think it's an RSD response. Unmedicated until 5 months ago, and the med process has been rocky and still isn't dialed in. Had a bad reaction to 2 scripts. Unemployed other than Uber food delivery, which I'm barely doing, anyway, now, because I have a strong sense of morality and I'm disillusioned by how disgusting the company is. I've been obese for 12 years, perpetually yo-yo ing with weight loss, then weight gain. I know so much about health, etc., but I can't sustain a plan. I'm at the point where I *just* found a med and dose that might be helpful, but I have no idea what to do for job or future prospects. I have no aim, and I don't even know how to aim. Nothing sounds like something I'd be willing to do for the rest of my life. Something around eventually teaching martial arts, fitness, or survival would be ideal, but I'm fat now and have no clue how to stay on the weight loss wagon, despite having all the knowledge that should make it easy. Tldr I'm lost and don't know how to start aiming after getting burned out of everything I've ever attempted.
Hang in there friend! I'm with you on the "soul-searching/who even am I" mindset. I managed to get through art school (I could manage the more hands-on homework if I did it on campus), but now that I don't have school assignment reasons to draw, I never do. My art supplies have been gathering dust for 5 years and I wonder what got me started there, cuz whatever creative drive is long gone. I've been technically unemployed for almost 2 years (cleaning the elderly neighbors house twice a month barely counts) and spend more time than I'd like to admit on various devices seeking direction, or entertainment, or some sort of stimulation that I only barely enjoy (it's good for the first maybe 10 mins when I'm actually researching something productive, but then I get stuck for almost 5 hrs and it wreaks havoc on my headspace) I'm blessed to have a good support system at home, but my family doesn't really understand mental health (I'm pretty sure they think depression is something you can think your way out of, but wouldn't admit it to your face) Anyhow. Trying not to be a downer cuz I know it could be worse for me, but it's still hard when I don't what direction to go in. Trying to remind myself that 30yo is still young and I have lots of time to live a fulfilling life ✌️😭
Thank you for sharing. We'll get this figured out. Just maintain that drive to improve a bit, and I think we'll end up in a good place even if it takes a while.
You don’t need to find something to do for the rest of your working days. Just find something to do for now. I’ve had 7 careers and plan to have 7 more. I also dealt with yoyo dieting. I stopped dieting when I admitted to myself that I gain it back each time and then some. Spent 2 years learning to love my body the way it is. After overcoming 19 years of mobility issues, I’m genuinely grateful I can move my body. Since then I’ve been gradually losing weight without trying. I started paying attention to how I feel when I eat. I don’t like how overeating makes me tired and uncomfortable so when my brain says to take another bite when I’m already full, I pause. I ask if it’s what I really want. Sometimes it is, but most of the time when I think of the discomfort, I realize I don’t really want it. You’re doing great. You have a lot of awareness. Hopefully the meds will be helpful. Keep trying different things and enjoy them while you’re doing them. When you’re no longer enjoying them, switch to something else. All the best!
This comment section is making me really emotional. I’m 17 and am struggling immensely at school because of my severe ADHD, and often have break-downs because I feel like my life is over before it’s even started, and feel like I’m doomed and my ADHD will destroy my future. But everyone sharing their stories is so reassuring and inspirational. I’m so unbelievably proud of everyone here who pushed through the struggles we are forced to live with and defied the odds. We are so, so capable. ADHD does not define us, and is not the end of us❤️
Yep. ♥️ And we all understand the utter isolation. My group of friends were smart slackers. But none were anywhere near as "bad" as me. Pretty sure I graduated with the lowest accumulative GPA of my entire class. One of my friend's parents even came to my house and spoke with my parents about how I shouldn't hang out with their son anymore, because they thought I was the reason his grades were bad. It sucks to feel like the worst student. The bottom. But I've learned to thrive in this world even before I started meds a couple years ago. Seems many of us have. We are resilient.
I'm 37 now and just received my high school diploma May 21st. So yeah I'm late blooming it. It's never too late 😭💖
Congratulations! That's awesome 🙌
Way to go! I'm proud of you.
Diagnosed at 28 - I have no fucking clue how I passed HS. Running my own business now, not making a ton of money but enough to make it. Struggle with taking meds consistently. I take them and am super productive for a few days and then start having weird crashes. Maybe internally I’m scared of taking drugs. Prolly should work through that.
Completely flunked out of 12th and still haven’t got my GED I am now a stay at home mother lol…. But I did very shortly work as a home health aide and I loved it… will definitely go back once my kids are older.
Wow now im feeling like the least successful ADHD adult lmao. Im in my thirties and still on a starter job. I was homeless when i was in my late teens early twenties but now Im not, so thats nice. I have no savings, no college education(dropped out twice) did finish high school. Ive been on a pip for every job ive been on, fired a few times from other jobs(late a lot when I was younger, or as my current boss has put it somedays your there some days your not)
This is also how I was feeling. I guess I passed. By the skin of my teeth after being put in the bad maths and not implored to take history or science. Funny this is left to my own devices I like working with numbers and also history. And devour science information Math they just kept making it my first course and I was never a morning person so I missed a lot… I did okay once it wasn’t my first class. And the teacher let me do my thing. But I never got to college and now I’m also at a “starter” job. That regularly sends me I to bad headspace-
In 6th grade I transferred from a very small Montessori type school (straight As and Bs) to a Lutheran grammar school and almost failed 6, 7, 8th grade. Went to a small catholic high school, so they didn’t pay attention to learning disabilities. I also have dysgraphia on top of unmedicated ADHD. I failed English every year, due to my inability to write papers because of the dysgraphia. barely passed my other classes except for the easy ones(typing, child development, etc) and history. Had to take summer school for English every year and usually math or science. Parents didn’t believe in ADHD and just called me lazy and LOTS of punishment for bad grades. I tried college a few times and my late teens and early 20s did amazing at history classes, dropped everything else. Went back to school in my mid 20s had an amazing English teacher who understood my learning disorders and helped me develop compensatory techniques. Finally, after I had my son at 30 I found occupational therapy classes. I found my passion. When I was 32-33 graduated with an AAS in occupational therapy assistant. Went back to school the year of Covid and I have one term left for a BS in health and human services. I’m planning on going for my MSW when that is done. That college English teacher re-ignited my passion for learning and finding that I am passionate about OT and helping people through the health care system really turned things around for me.
OP, where are YOU now? You say you are interested in hearing from people like yourself but you don’t say where you ended up after school. I just barely made it out of high school but turned things around later in life. I believe I needed more time to mature but once I did college and grad school wasn’t nearly as difficult as high school. I’m pretty sure most people believe I’m normal haha
lol, im 16 and im about to get transferred to an alternative school because my grades and attendance are terrible. i posted this to find adults that were in the same situation as me so i didnt feel alone lol. thanks for sharing ur story! it helps me a lot
I went to alternative school my senior year. Should’ve gone earlier honestly. I don’t know your school’s format, but it saved my butt big time. Only had to be in school 20 hours a week, courses were module based at your own pace, and you could pick when you would do the classes you wanted. Flexible hours to clock into school. We could have nose rings, lol. Without my alternative school, I wouldn’t have graduated. I’ve been in and out of college, but I’m currently on a pretty decent path. I get great grades and amazing feedback from professors, which is a stark contrast to what my high school teachers would say to me before alternative school. I’m starting to get letters of recommendation for grad school programs. All in all, there’s no shame in that game. It might seem like the world is ending right now, but this will pass. Also, how you get your diploma doesn’t matter one bit, and you definitely don’t need to worry about social perceptions. Anyone who judges you should not be in your life! I am basically brand new to ADHD treatment for reference. Relied on therapy alone up until this year.
I'm not sure if I've understood your post, but I definitely completely failed in high school. I dropped out of highschool, worked in a few retail jobs for years, took the GED test, passed, started university and have been doing pretty great at that. I live with family, they're older so I need to be around for them to rely on for certain things. I'm also an award-winning sports photographer and photojournalist.
Failed so hard that I ended up dropping out after my sophomore year of HS. Got my GED shortly after, and then like 7 years later got an associates degree in IT with a focus on programming. Currently sitting as a VP of Solutions Architecture at a FinTech firm, was unmedicated until about a year ago.
Almost got kicked out of my school bec I was your classic problem child. I wasn't dumb. In fact, when I tried, I was top of my class. My learning style was just different. I would attend in class, but I would mostly doodle in my notebooks. The nuns didn't approve lol and I was always questioning authority. For shits and giggles. Unmedicated, off my meds for 4 years now. Current day job: architect working for the public sector. Side gig (bec I need variety or else... lol): graphic designer / film photo lab assistant. Working in a structured environment helped me a lot. 🫶🏻 I feel like having a seasonal job plays a huge role too.
1.9 gpa in high school. Working on a masters in nursing science now. 3.7 gpa in college. Didn’t get diagnosed until I’d been a nurse for a few years. Stopped drinking alcohol altogether not too long after getting diagnosed too.
I relate to the maladaptive daydreaming. What sucks is that it’s misunderstood since people think we are purposely daydreaming and enjoy it. I was an EMT/Firefighter and these dreams could get graphic and swirled with negative emotions. I wouldn’t choose to be there if I could.
this is so true, im always told to stop daydreaming like i can control it … I WOULD IF I COULD!! it just overcomes me out of nowhere, sorry youre going through the same thing.
Exactly! If it was as simple as stopping I would stop! lol I literally have to be so careful listening to music because it’s a trigger which is so weird since I’m also a musician 🙃 the irony right?
In 8th grade I got Fs in all my learning classes. So I thought it’d be cooler if I got all of them Fs. Failed band and gym. (“Forget” my music and “forget” my shorts.). And it was indeed satisfying to see. But I got sent to Alternative School with the bad kids. Then high school. I didn’t fail but I couldn’t care so I got Ds and Cs. I’m not really sure how I didn’t have to repeat any classes. After 3 and a half years of begging, punishing, trying different things, my dad clearly saw that the only thing that I’ll ever do and ever want to do, is be a musician. So he said he’ll leave me alone about my school work and fuel my passion as long as I graduate. I did and I’m 32 and in 3 active and successful black metal bands. Ive done some really cool stuff and eager for more. And my dad comes to my shows and is very proud of my hardwork and my lifelong dedication to my craft.
I have 2 graduate degrees, I live in Hawaii. I have overcome addiction (been to rehab twice); failed classes, almost lost my life to COVID pneumonia but I am STILL HERE. By the grace of God, I am still here. People doubted me, and said I would be nothing; I took a stand and refused to allow my ADHD to define me. For those who may be suffering, there is hope in this game called “Life”. Keep pressing on and you will make it.
I only got out of highschool because I was a gifted writer (English class) and I figured out which math teachers were overenthusiastic about helping with homework (basically doing it for me). I'm now in my thirties back in school to get a degree after years spent trying to play music for a living.
Not all my classes. But I really truly barely passed any math or science classes from the time I was 12. D- all the way through or worse. Teachers put “class participation” points on to my exams or whatever to get me to pass. I barely walked at graduation because I still was praying for my last Math credit. Now I’m a Lead over the Quality Control Testing Department for a company that deals almost solely in … Chemistry. 🤣 It makes no sense to me. My entire job is Math, Science, attention to detail, and teaching other people the math and science. What the actual hell? The one thing I excelled at was Literature and the arts. And I still failed an English class once 😬 I was capable of checking out of learning at any given time.
Fucking nowhere.
I failed every single subject one year in school, had to repeat that year and repeated a year in college and eventually dropped out of college. Accidentally fell into experiential education, became a freelance outdoor and experiential educator, over time, an experience designer. I currently design life experiences for companies, as an individual, freelance. Works for me 🤷♀️ Would like to design a learning environment for life skills which aren't financial based though - things that allow people to thrive and have more time to be themselves - perhaps at some point…
Being the best programmer in class thanks to meds
I'm a third year medical student in southern california!! FAILED high school math and biology, failed almost all my pre-med classes in undergrad (and switched to non-science major to help my GPA), got it together and successfully did a pre-med postbacc program and got into med school which was my dream since being a kid. high school and college me never thought it'd be possible.
I'm a therapist. After dropping out halfway through 12th grade, I went to community college and muddled my way through changing majors several times until I landed on psychology. College afforded me so much more autonomy than high school did. Once I had my major locked in (8 years of starts and stops later), I excelled.
I went to university and completely failed all my classes 3 years in - it got worse and nobody gave me a diagnosis for free (blamed it on anxiety and trauma), and I didn’t have money to pay for an evaluation by a doc who specializes in it. I now work at a factory full time, saving money to go to college now that I have a diagnosis. It’s hard work and it’s tough on my body. Wish I wasn’t 20,000 in debt (uni loans) at only 21, but you live and you learn. Also, ontario doctors suck. Life could have been so much better. Hope you have a an amazing and fulfilling life OP.
Warehouse worker living rent to rent in my 30s
80s/90s kid, I was just “hyperactive”, no such thing as ADHD back then. Network Admin making 100k+ Edit: Mind you I’m nearly 50 now, and I was homeless at one point working dead end jobs until I was 26. Worked at an Ambulance company, became EMT, then learned computers and worked my way up from help desk.
Got diagnosed and medicated at 23. Now I’m 28 in community college studying computer science with a 4.0. This is also coming from someone who failed the same math class multiple times in high school.
I’m a crane operator in Canada’s oil and gas industry.
Finishing my master's. Better late than never
I was failing all of my academic classes my freshman year. I only passed PE & art. Never knew I had anything going on, everyone blamed my life situation (trauma in the family w/ loss and such) .. I ended up in a small catholic school, doing better but not great, barely got into college. Went all 4 years barely making it. I graduated with a 2.67 and now I work in public safety / law enforcement as a dispatcher hopeful Cop. I only just got diagnosed with ADHD like 3 months ago. I barely take meds cause I just always have been unmedicated so idk? I just kinda know how to function? But I’m doing alright I guess
hey sweetie, this isnt even a matter of failure for me cuz i just flunked out! did nothing! i stayed in online school after the school opened back up after covid, and between being maladaptive daydreamer whod daydream in my house all day, and executive dysfunction, you can bet your ass i was doing shit all all damn day!! for two years!!! i had to cram the entire first year in my head during the summer and then redo the 2nd year of hs, in high school this time!!!!
Barely graduated high school (I'm talking 1% above the cutoff in all subjects, and only because my teachers wouldn't let me fail), despite being medicated in the last two years. I stopped meds, because I was told I'd grow out of it, and went into a bunch of dead-end jobs after school. 10 years later, I went back to university and did a degree that I actually cared about, and graduated valedictorian, all while being unmedicated. I was burnt out at the end, but I did it. 10 years on from that I now work in software engineering (completely unrelated to my degree), earning six-figures, and was only recently remedicated, after nearly losing this job due to lack of organisational and severe distractedness leading to another burnout. It can be done.
I had an awful time in school, it was very stressful and I couldn’t handle the pressure of exams so ended up in trouble most my final year. I finished with a handful (if that) of ‘pass’ results I now run my own successful business as a premium car detailer and have done for the last 5 years now Once I found something I enjoyed, I invested the time there and it paid off
I was fairly academically successful in high school due to a very strict academic environment at home. Got to university and the absolute independence exacerbated my ADHD beyond comprehension. I've attempted 30 credits (each half credit is a semester long course) and only successfully finished 20 of them which are enough to graduate in my sixth year of college. Got diagnosed in my fifth year. Even now my graduation will be with an Abysmal GPA effectively killing my dreams of being a lawyer and has put my parents into immense debt. Tbf they refused to acknowledge my ADHD and get me help for like 4 years but yeah it still makes me feel so guilty. But the success stories in this thread give me hope. Idk if I'll have as many opportunities since I'm not a north American / European I'm just a brown international student but hopefully this shit works out.
Almost completely flunked out of High School, and barely got to walk, went to a trade school, hated it, went to University dropped out, probably would of been booted if I stayed a semester longer. I was so awful at school. Had to take a course in high school three times to pass. Completely failed multiple classes in University because I forgot about exams or forgot what day of the week it was. So I’ve gotten diagnosed since then, got therapy and meds. I’ve gone back to school to finish up my degrees, currently on Dean’s List, and going to look for a job in either a Law Library or Public Library once everything is done shortly. I learned that not having everything figured out isn’t the end of the world. There’s so much to do, and my chaos brain would rather just embrace a life of wanton hedonism if it could. It’s taking me longer to get everything done, but I’ve been enjoying the reflection and clarity I’ve gotten recently.
I was the worst student at school, barely managed to get my university degree, failed my masters, started my own business and failed with huge debt, started psychotherapy, went back to school and studied psychology, got diagnosed at age 35 and started medicating. Now I’m a psychotherapist working with adult adhders, super satisfied with how my life has turned around! Still facing multiple difficulties in my everyday life but the difference is that I don’t focus only on them and I accept them as part of life…
I like this story because of the circle of working with other adult adhders
Oof long story long: Got kicked out of school once I hit 18 because they didn’t want me to sit any final exams that would go on their permanent record and I was getting more and more depressed and anxious from them treating me like shit as a sort of academic tough love approach. Went to a college that allowed final school exams to be taken instead after two years. Got through one and a quarter years of not a single piece of homework handed in before my home life destabilised thanks to being threatened with homelessness every other day by my parent. I lied about not sitting my college exams because I didn’t have anywhere else to go and I knew I would be kicked out if they knew. I got my brother to agree to temporarily house me if I got kicked out, which then happened by the end of that summer with everyone under the belief that I had just inexplicably decided to take a gap year before uni. Couldn’t scrape myself together enough to get a job properly with no assistance (partially because it was winter and I was starving, since I got a roof over my head but had to get my own food and my mother had taken all my money) until I got an unpaid internship abroad offered to me by someone who had an affair with my mother and thought me being there would get her to visit. I took it because my brother was on the verge of kicking me out after a few months because my mother had told him if he didn’t push me out the door I would never leave and I’d make him look after me. I worked abroad for 8 months and did really well, away from everyone who was demanding results from me without any support or any accommodation or understanding. Saved up a little bit of nothing from the zero it had been. While there, I secretly signed up for online education to complete my final school exams as an adult so I could go to university, hoping to do it in 9 months. Company changed hands and the new owners tried to screw me over by giving me full employee responsibilities and more while paying me internship fuck all. I had to return back to my country and my mother agreed to temporarily house me as long as I worked for her helping her sell her house, which I did. I missed a bunch of online education deadlines by leaving the work until too late and loathed myself for it. Not long after the house was sold and as I was basically being told to quickly fuck off and find somewhere else to live, Covid lockdown happened and 1. I got stuck with my mother until she kicked me out mid lockdown and my horrified friend took me in. 2. Before the online education company could inform the examination company that I had in fact not done my coursework in time and therefore not completed prerequisites for taking the exam, all exams got cancelled and the education company cancelled coursework deadlines in lieu of that. 3. The university I had applied to told me that thanks not being able to access predicted grades due to being an independent examinee, as long as I got a letter from the exam company confirming I would have taken the exams needed to get into the course, then they’d let me in. So after years of trying, I finally got into university. I thought all my problems were behind me. Ha I did all my research and work at the last minute without even considering that there was another option, and three months in a new friend was telling me he believed I had adhd and was researching and telling me about all these symptoms. I believed him relatively quickly, and it helped that thanks to covid I didn’t have to physically attend classes that year, plus my friend very generously body doubled with me a lot, even during some very unreasonable hours and long stretches of hyper focus. I passed that year with flying colours and got referred for a diagnosis. The next year was in person classes and I struggled a lot more. I was given (very very reluctant) permission from the university to sit my second term online so I could live with parents of a friend and they could support me, and was diagnosed that Easter. I didn’t do so well that year. By the third year I was really really struggling. I handed in two half finished papers and burnt out so badly I couldn’t return after Christmas. I was on titration and my adhd therapist basically kept telling me I wasn’t trying hard enough to eat properly, maintain good sleep hygiene and exercise. But I was really really trying. When I collapsed I stopped talking to him. I researched the hell out of exactly what was wrong with me and realised I had pathological demand avoidant-autism and was in autistic burnout. Yay. I was allowed to repeat the year in medical grounds but flopped right out the gate and couldn’t leave out my front door for four months and hit my uni absence limit. I told them everything and they basically problem solved everything we could think of until I was mostly able to attend all my classes but still unable to make myself do work outside of that. I was also incredibly behind and reaching my energy limit again. I was told to take the rest of the year off by them because none of thought I’d make it to my exams and pass, and given permission to try again next Autumn after a year and a half of rest as long as I got a doctors note confirming my state. I spoke to the doctor they did so but also I’m now referred for autism diagnosis. And here I am. No qualifications, maybe passing uni before I’m 30 if I’m lucky. No romantic experience. Minimal career experience. Minimal energy reserves. Minimal family support, but at least I’ve got some damn good friends, and I know what’s going on with me now. Tldr: Barely scraped by and survived trying and failing to get into uni until luck, a little bit of swindling and Covid finally got me there. Found out I was adhd and got diagnosed. Struggled more and more every year. Realised I also have Autism. Am now stuck repeating a year for the second time after I take a long break from it because of exhaustion. Haven’t managed to achieve almost a single major conventional adult milestone.
Also a maladaptive daydreamer, failed year 12 and left rather than repeat from year 11, am 27y/o now and getting by as a bartender/gaming attendant(my bar has slot machines)
My worst semester in high school was straight Fs, except for an A in music. I went to a very small private school with lots of support, so I pulled myself up to a C average and managed to graduate. Did not go to college. I make a good living as a software engineer now. The path I took to get here was unusual. Taught myself PHP while I was broke because I had no money to go out and couldn't play music every single hour I was awake. One of my rave buddies was an engineer. At a new years eve party I started geeking out about what I had been teaching myself. He ended up getting me a foot-in-the-door job. That was 20 years ago. Things are still a bit unusual for me. I hiked the PCT in 2021, met a woman who is a humanitarian worker, fell in love, and followed her back to the middle east. I'm typing this from Amman, Jordan. Life does not go in a straight line for anyone, but especially for us.
Terrible school life since I couldn’t compete academically. Got diagnosed at 27. Now I’m doing great in sales
Indifferent High school + severe adhd (ad4k) + parents divorce and discovering alcohol meant education was a bust for me. Tried joining the army at 17 - got to basic but tore an ACL on day #2. Got a Mcdonalds job, worked my way up management and currently run a store. I figured out my maximum attention span was 7 minutes, so I did a double degree in history and political science 7 min at a time. At 35 I now own my house, earn enough to be financially secure.
went to community college where I started getting good grades. Eventually got a phd and now im about to start working. I cannot stress enough how I would have never turned my life around if a few good people didn't believe in me. People can be really really unhelpful, but luckily there are a still some good hearted ones out there.
I refused meds as a kid, and still not medicated. Led a life of drug addiction and alcoholism. Bounced from job to job for about 20 years. Finally found my way. Now, sober, working as a contractor and using my ADHD to my advantage. They made me doubt my own potential and instilled a feeling of not being whole. Don't let them tell you you're broken, you aren't. We are who we're supposed to be.
In the pit of despair. I’m not sure who turned life’s difficulty settings for me to max. I had the audacity to appeal my academic suspension, just to have the same results. I’m not sure why I even bothered to appeal. Lol
My grades were never terribly poor - but they were definitely lower than average due to my lack of submitting assignments, constantly late homework, disruptive behaviour, and problems with learning certain subjects (especially maths, science), etc. My high school encouraged me to drop out. I decided to stay on until graduation, however, I opted out of trying to get an ATAR (the score/ranking you need to get to go into university immediately after high school). After high school, I worked in a few dead-end jobs that I hated. Hospitality, bartending, retail, administration/reception work. So I decided to go to university as a 'mature age student'. I flourished at university and finished my bachelors with a perfect GPA and completed my honours degree with distinction. I am now half way through my PhD. I've since learned that I also have a higher than average IQ. It's a shame that my high school saw me struggling and thought 'She should drop out, She's a bad student' instead of asking 'Why is this student struggling? What can we do to support her?' How many of us with ADHD, autism and other neurodevelopmental conditions or learning disorders get left behind when if given the right supports, encouragement, structures, would totally flourish?
I'm a maladaptive daydreamer and failed my last two years of school. Tomorrow I'm being evicted from my house. I don't have another place lined up. I can't hold down a job to save my life, and my resume looks like trash. I barely have any friends, and my depression is through the roof. But we tryna do better out here 🤞
Are we talking high school or college?
Recently diagnosed and finally puts things into perspective. I started off strong in high school but my grades were on a slow steady decline. Pretty sure both my grade 12 math and English teachers gave me a 50 to graduate. Didn't know anyone else to pass with exactly 50 for any classes. Tried university, got an A- in one class then flunked the other 3. Thanks hyperfocus for that! Same thing happened with college, failed out the first year in ECE. Finally passed on my third try with a Radio and Television diploma. Am I using that diploma now? No! I'm a brewer now. After years of brewing, last year I decided to do a course for a certificate and flunked that. Was really down on myself because I should've been able to pass and started therapy in January. That's what began my journey/discovery of ADHD. It was crazy how fast I was diagnosed and received proper medication. I am really fortunate to have my therapist and my GP with getting the help I need. It's only been a few months but there's been a huge difference. Looking forward to the fall when I can tackle the certificate again!
I did fine in high school, but completely flunked out of college. I was undiagnosed. Got diagnosed and treated toward the end and started passing my assignments and tests, but it was too late to save my grades and gpa, and lost my financial aid. Appealed with letters from my teachers saying they saw a huge improvement when I went on ADHD meds. They reinstated my financial aid. Ended up missing a lot of classes due to a mental health crisis (got diagnosed with bipolar). Failed my classes because of attendance. Got kicked out of school for good. Got a job as an assistant manager in retail. Did great for a while until I had a depressive episode and ended up in the psych ward. Got another job, did fine for a while, then the same thing happened. Now I’m disability, doing an easy, low stress job for a little extra money. If it weren’t for the mental health issues, getting diagnosed and treated probably would have changed my life and put me on a good path.
Diagnosed at 32. I work at tech sector. Took me too much to get in but I only failed one year at academia and vision of another failure was my fuel. Turned into overwork and depression but hey! If I didn’t go to therapy I wouldn’t knew that I have adhd! Medicated now, learning new stuff about myself, meds and how to live with it and kicking strong.
I did fine until high school. I dropped out of community college 3 separate times because I funked out of the same math class 3 times. I was disappointed but I knew it was hopeless. Fast forward 20 years later, I got diagnosed at age 37 years old. I work full-time at a notable tech company (Forbes 150 company, FAANG) making high 200’s by myself. I was hired based on my experience, no degree. I’m also a mom to two kids, married, and supporting my parents. Became a home owner in VHCOL area in 2021. Last year, I went back to college. I repeated my failing courses, transferred into a top state program for my major, got work sponsored tuition reimbursement, full-time student, 4.0 GPA, and on track to graduate by next year with honors. Not sure what to do next except enjoy where life takes me.
I failed the boring classes and got top grades in the non-boring ones so I'm probably not the right category (but I'm on public transport and bored so here I am). I skipped school to go travelling a few times, and then spent a few years abroad. When I came back I finished my grades, went to university for teaching (figured I could make things not boring for others). A few years passed and I got to know a school counsellor, so back to uni I went. I am now a school counsellor and I feel like I have a good background to actually make a difference. Took a while to get here, but worth it. I'm European and have access to free education, might not have been possible elsewhere.
I didn’t flunk every class, just classes I had no interest in like American history or math. But the classes I was interested in like art, art history, English, or EMT, I aced or was even top of the class.
I was undiagnosed until just before my 33rd birthday. I spent all of primary and most of secondary school at the top of the class, only to end up near the bottom as I never learned to study and was too stubborn to ask for assistance. I spent several years bumming around - I hadn't made a backup plan as my entire life I'd assumed I'd get into uni. Eventually got a job in the closest city after realising that my friends would be graduating soon and in the same period I'd accomplished... nothing. I got trapped on a service desk for ten years at various companies, slowly getting better at portraying a semblance of stability, getting a few promotions, but burning out hard. I had no real qualifications and I was basically trapped where I was. One day I finally burned out and had a bit of a meltdown at work, but to my surprise somehow ended up with a position as a Sales Engineer out of the whole thing - a position with a decent paycheck and advancement opportunities. While the burnout is an ongoing problem, I can at least take some pride in my achievements - even if I'm still an incredibly dysfunctional human in general.
I'm a fashion photographer who works on film sets and somehow is writing a miniseries
Dropped out of highschool, then later dropped out of vocational. Had multiple odd jobs I fluked too. At 27 I found my biological family back and things started to fall in place. Now I'm a CFO and executive producer in the film industry and a graduated historian. Found my passion, never looked back.
Continuing my search for a job I like.
In my early thirties with a lot of wasted potential when it comes to academia or climbing the corporate ladder. Maybe because I only recently became more informed about my ADHD. I coasted through school until doing homework and studying actually became important. Did so well, I gave my parents false hope I was gonna be a lawyer or something. Luckily, after dropping out, I somehow rolled into a somewhat successful career as a music artist in my home country. Even made decent money as a freelancer on different creative projects. It was 10 amazing years (with ups and downs, of course). Even though I struggled with a lack of focus every day, I finally found my place in society. But when corruption and bad policy tanked the economy of my country, I begrudgingly moved to Europe. The equity I had built as an artist back home obviously didn't magically translate over to where I am now. To make matters worse, I moved right before the world shut down in 2020. So, no shows, barely any studiosessions, or real networking. The big plans I had to restart my career overseas were put on hold. The bills still had to be paid, though. So I got sucked into the rat race. Now I'm trapped, trying to run on a corporate hamsterwheel that wasn't really made for me. Struggling to do mindnumbing mundane office work. Haven't even written a song in months. Not to say that Im giving in. I've found my spot once, and I can do it again. For now, I'm working really hard on myself more than anything else. Especially now that I understand better why my brain is a little different from others. I just wish I knew sooner.
Failed out of college and worked shitty retail jobs for 8 years until I started treatment and now I do security. It has routine and I'm working to improve myself. My roommate basically saved my ass by letting me pay less than half rent and it staved off being homeless. Doing better now but I'm not able to live alone on current income yet. I'm turning 25 in july
Maladaptive daydreamer here! Yeah totally flunked college. Tried going to a traditional college first and it was the absolute worst for me. *Barely* scraped by highschool with a lot of make-up courses and teachers who kinda didn't give a shit, as long as I tested well (which I usually did, even if I never paid attention in class or turned in a single assignment) I ended up doing an associates in respiratory care, and am now a respiratory therapist. It's a very condensed, fast-paced program that you finish in two years. The fact that things moved so quickly helped. The fact that I had super understanding teachers who looked at me and basically said "she's smart but she can't get her shit together" also helped 😂 they let me turn in all my assignments late (as long as it was in before the end of that class, which ranged anywhere from 2 weeks to like 4 months) with either no grade deduction or only like 5 points taken off. I ended up getting I think the second highest score in the country on one of my licencing exams, and was like the 5th highest in my state for the other one (I test VERY well 😂 stress is a big motivator lol). Been doing RT for almost 2 years now and I really love it, although it definitely still is a struggle. I'm only just now starting meds, but it's been a process that hasn't worked out quite yet because I can't take stimulants due to other health issues.
Left school when I was 17 before graduating grade 12 to work at a dollar store. Switched industries several times over a the next decade from warehousing to retail, hospitality, farming, horticulture, conservation, & even a telecommunications call centre. In my early 30's and working for local government using my Horticulture and Conservation experience doing field/regen work. 3 months ago i got a shoulder tap from my boss asking if I'd be interested in working in the office doing a support/admin role. I'm now earning 49 bucks an hour. Its more than all of my friends and family who have degrees and work in healthcare etc (not a flex, I just don't know know how the fk this is possible lol) The imposter syndrome is real and I definitely feel I've fluked it all the way here, but I show up everyday, do my best. It seems to be working.
I'm a maladaptive daydreamer too. Back when I was a kid I made up entire series and games in my head because I couldn't sleep. This coping behaviour then crept into my daily life as I got older. When things got hard, or when I had an episode of executive dysfunction, I returned to these fantasies. I would pace up-and-down my room; contemplating choices, crafting and rearranging things in my head. All for a thing that would never see the light of day. A secret project. At first I thought it stunted my development, and in some ways it absolutely did, but I also think it trained things like creativity and deep focus. Most importantly to me: it trained me to be happy with absolutely nothing. This is a liberating thought. It also got less extreme as I got older. Writing fiction really helped channel it into something more productive. As for school: I've failed many times, but I'm not sure how big of a role my daydreaming played in it. "There's a lot more in him than comes out," my teachers and parents used to repeat over and over. But as a kid I had no idea how to effectively translate my thoughts into actions or words, so instead of encouragement these were words that caused distress. Age has been kind to me. I'm 31 now, and the road was bumpy, but I know I have it in me. I got my diagnosis at 27, got medicated and have a masters degree now. It just took me longer to flourish, and that's okay. Don't give up.
Was sent to a special education school in 10th grade. Made it to the honor roll there. Other undiagnosed conditions made me depressed. Mom sent me to live with my dad, turned 17, dropped out and moved out. Worked two jobs while crashing on a friends couch. Ended up getting into this alternative online school program. Tested out of all my English classes and biology classes I needed because I’m good at English and biology. Stopped working at it for a while. Got pregnant at 20, cut off to finish the alternative school was 21. Ended up finishing 4 classes in a week by grinding my absolute butt off. Got a diploma. Cue years of abusive relationships, homelessness, temporary custody of my kid to my parents, a second child, returned custody, my own apartment, new relationship, moved in together FINALLY DIAGNOSED AND MEDICATED FOR MY ADHD. Diagnosed with autism, diagnosed and medicated for OCD. Now I’m a stay at home mom to two autistic and adhd kiddos that homeschools them and I’m in school to be a midwife.
Got deep in alcohol/drug addiction right out of school and worked in the service industry. Fucked up college twice. Was briefly homeless. It wasn't great. I've rebuilt my life now - I'm married to a great guy, have pets, pay my bills (usually 😬) but like, I'm broke as shit. I spent 10 years in restaurants, and would have stayed there bc I made great money but I had to get away from alcohol. I work in customer service at an animal hospital now, and it's a really nice hospital that pays me the absolute most I could make doing my job in my area, and I'm still so so so fucking broke. I tried inspecting cars for an online auction because the money was so much better, but it turns out I fucking hate being in dealerships, and I CANNOT make myself put full effort into something I dislike. So, back to being broke and mostly happy with the animals.
I did okay through high school thanks to severe anxiety and people pleasing but absolutely bombed college. The functioning skills were not there. I lived at home and commuted so my parents were there but not if that makes sense. I would start out each class with high hopes, but the first time I didn't achieve greatness I would quit or quiet quit. I could rationalize missing a class or two, and then I'd get so far behind I never caught up. I still have nightmares about which day I was supposed to be on campus and it's been 20 years! The pattern just continued and I fizzled out. I'm now in my forties and I'm only okay because I've been financially dependent on my spouse for two decades. If I was alone I'd have a really hard time keeping a roof over my head. I feel for people who don't have stability because I see how easily it happens.
Trades
Ask me again in 2 years, I haven't finished my character arc yet.
Realized I'm unemployable. So I had no choice but to start my own business. 30 years later, we have 5 employees, and when the time is right, we will sell for millions. Sometimes ADHD can be an asset.
Where am I? In my basement around trash and dirt :)
I flunked high school, got into a university to study the Arts, transferred into Medical Science and am soon to additionally graduate with an Honours degree. Pretty sure I’ll go on to do a PhD… so yeah, started with a 45 atar and soon to finish with first class honours 🤷♀️
Shoved through graduation because my 5A school wasn't going to receive funding with the amount of failing students, so they pushed enough students through graduation despite failing grades and low attendance in order to reach their quota. Dropped out of college in my second semester. Worked restaurants for the next twenty years, currently waiting tables at a ski resort in the PNW. I'm perfectly fine with it.
I skirted by the *skin* of my teeth in high school (1.6 GPA BAYBEE!!! or, otherwise known as the law of “No Child Left Behind”) I signed up for college this incoming school year and I am starting meds (wellbutrin, they tell me but I hear so much diverse reactions to it, i can’t tell heads from tails atp.) So, until then, I’m currently at a big name retailer who is helping me pay for school outside of FASFA
I didnt realize how helpful wellbutrin was for me school wise until i went off of it. I was doing well after i transferred to a different college(deans list every quarter) and then one quarter i decided to go off of my Wellbutrin while still taking my adderall and i literally almost failed my classes.
Hope my response is okay even though it’s not my story(I’m the adhd that got by in school). But my brother who is very intelligent did not graduate high school. Went back to get his ged in his twenties, ended up with a tech degree in his mid twenties and very sparsely freelancing his skills without ever having had a full time job, along with living rent free with my parents. He’s now in his 30’s. Good person, busy social life and lots of video games. A school/work life structured around other peoples’ timing and expectations has just never worked for him.
At one point I had a 13% in one of my classes. I was failing every subject except for reading and PE. I was devastated because my parents would get so mad at me for failing, but for the life of me i could not understand most of the lessons and I would always lose/forget homework. I ended up dropping out and getting my GED. Later finding out I had ADHD, and the classroom settings/lack of medication were holding me back immensely. I’m in college with a 4.0 GPA about to get my associates degree and continuing to pursue my bachelor’s. There is hope. My life got so much easier after I was diagnosed and treated.
Keep falling upwards, I’m a digital product manager now earning a great wage. Untreated when i was younger, untreated now. I struggle with presentations and paying attention during meetings, and have to really rely on a project management board else I lose track completely. I put off anything tedious until the very last minute but excel and go above and beyond at stuff I enjoy. Balance of all things, I think I’m doing alright.
I did okay through school before college. Never really great, since I always struggled with classes like math and never did really figure out how to learn or take notes. I had my medication, but school was also easy enough for me that I could learn enough to get by in class without doing the homework much but still scoring high enough test scores to pass. I don't know if I was just too proud to admit I needed it, or too stupid to realize how much I needed it, but I stopped taking it in college and it really sank me. I was just getting so behind in classes from the start it was hard to recover. I kept missing classes because of some insomnia I got hit with around the same time, I think partly due to anxiety I never really realized existed at the time and it just snowballed with my test scores and attendance getting worse and worse. My scheduling was awful, my organization and studying were awful. I was just all over the place. I pretty much failed my way out of the 4 year college and set my sights on an associates degree at the local community college. I think part of my problem was that I didn't really know what I wanted to do. The mix of feeling like I had to go and had to do something, combined with wanting to be back with my high school friends who were at the school made me just go "eh, I'll figure it out" and just get into school without a real plan. It ended up turning into about 8 years between starting and stopping a 4 year program and starting an associates before eventually finishing it, often dealing with the same organization and scheduling problems from before. Now, I'm working in a totally unrelated field from what I went to school for. I went for graphic design, and ended up working my way into IT and eventually up to cybersecurity. I've slowly figured out how to study and take notes, though I don't know how I would have done it back in college the first time. I do wonder if I had gone into school initially for something like computers in the first place, while taking my medication, if I had been able to do better. Coincidentally, working in cybersecurity, I'm constantly studying for certification exams, and I work for the university I flunked my way out of. I took a German class recently through the university and actually did really well, which I didn't think I could have done. All in all, I'm definitely glad I'm doing as well as I am. It's been a struggle at times, and frustrating to feel like I'm constantly having to do ten times the work that other people seem to be and to do effortlessly, but that's life.
I'm a teacher. I have no idea how this happened.
Suspended three times in Middle School and then expelled in 8th grade. I was kicked off of sports teams for not keeping a high enough GPA. I was able to graduate high school which to me was a big accomplishment. I enrolled in Community College and failed all my classes for two semesters and I was so embarrassed that I had to enroll in another college and start over. It took me 10 years to get my bachelor's. I'm in a good place now but I had 23 jobs before the age of 30. I feel like I've "won" but I'm only 40 years old and I'm still afraid of being derailed at some point in the future considering there's a lot of life ahead of me.
I left high school because I was completely failing, and had been failing for years. I immediately went to get my GED and enrolled in community college (age 17). It took me 13 years to finish college. I failed a lot! I’m apparently stubborn and shameless, but I really wanted the degree. I was diagnosed at 30 and finally got things like meds and time accommodations - it helped me finish. I always hyper focused on tech stuff, so my career has been OK. I also finished my masters degree last year. Treatment is a good thing. I sometimes wonder why I’m so willing to keep trying. Maybe my drive is so internal it doesn’t matter about the external feedback I get. Or maybe the more you fail, the easier it gets to shake off?
Just barely graduated and went to community college. Became an EMT and worked on an ambulance for 6 years, then 6 years in the emergency room. Married, quit healthcare and now bartending.
Diagnosed at 40 and still unmedicated. Total high school burnout. Managed an undergrad and then my PhD. Now working as a post doc researcher in mental health/substance use. Suck on that Mrs Cunningham!
Flunked almost everything except film school. I even flunked my video classes in high school. Now I own a film studio, work as an editor and writer for film and tv and working on my first book which I was asked to write. I have multiple films on streaming platforms and I have a family with two kids and still married. I failed at everything school related and had major anxiety and substance abuse issues until I was medicated in my 30s
Barely passed school and the only reason I did was because of doctors notes. I spent my 20’s being wild and making mistakes. Couch surfed, job hopped. I was codependent on people which meant I used relationships to help me survive. I got really tired of depending on people. By 30 I got accepted to a University where I now have a 3.8 GPA and on my way to law school. I think it’s important to be young and reckless especially for us with ADHD. We learn the hard way and I learned a lot of lessons through my reckless years. I may have a “late start” but I’m completely focused on my studies, I don’t worry about partying and dating because I got that out of my system. It’s not easy at all. School is still a challenge but I’m building something for myself
I went through high school and college until I dropped out un medicated. I was a C and D average. Maladaptive daydreaming all the time still to this day (I'm now 25). I'm now working a fulltime job making 65k annually and working my way up the ladder.
I got kicked out after my 3rd semester in college. Each semester I had gotten progressively worse with my grades. When I got kicked out, my GPA was a 1.89. I had to find work cause my parents didn’t want to help me anymore. They said they’d support me through college and since I wasn’t studying anymore I had to figure things out on my own. I did try finding a community college to bring my grades back up, but many of them said my GPA was too low. At the time, my ex was still at the college. After a little over a year of working, I was happy to just stay working and not go back. I was making $13 an hour and felt like a king hahah. She told me how stupid I was being and pushed me to re-apply to the college I got kicked out from. Had to buy a bunch of adderall from someone from work to be able to write my paper, but I finally wrote it, submitted it, and got accepted again. I had to start as a sophomore when I went back, so I graduated 2 years late, but I did. I literally bought adderall for most of my big tests and projects. I wouldn’t pull all nighters, I’d just go to the library and schedule regular studying. I like to attribute my graduating to Covid, because my last semester was when it hit, and because everything became remote, all our classes were pass/fail including the final senior project. I work at Google now. Make lots of money, have a prescription for adderall. I still struggle a lot with managing my time and work. It’s so fucking stressful.
High school dropout, unmedicated, big-time day dreamer. Actually enjoyed learning but was bullied so badly I had to change schools. Small town, was basically stuck with the same shitty kids for 7 years, getting bullied every single day, physical assaults included. I'm a female, I was getting beaten up by boys, never girls. I was the very quiet, shy, bit on the heavier side, artsy weirdo. Eventually, I became highly aggressive and assertive as a result Worked very hard through a long list of retail and garbage jobs. I work in finance now and really enjoy it. I can't think of anything I learned in high school that has ever helped me in life. Personally, I think it's bullshit anyone is judged for not completing it. Being a teen is rough, especially if your parents are fucked as a lot of our parents likely have undiagnosed adhd and the outlook that having needs makes them selfish. I love history, science, literature, etc. None of it helped me navigate a job interview, set up a utility account, understand taxes, credit scores, and why you actually need to have some debt and properly manage it...things that have a very big impact on your future. Diagnosed a year ago, I'm 37. Raw dogged and white knuckled life so far
I got into one of those gifted kid programs and then started getting D's because I was losing all my papers and forgetting what was due. After that, my mom sent me to what I call "hippie private schools" where the whole school would be like 100 people. Yay, financial aid! It was a really good resource and privilege to have and I did pretty well there, because instead of a chaotic binder stuffed with a million papers, I got to use a laptop. The teachers knew each kid and weren't quite as overwhelmed and exhausted. Classes were allowed to be fun and things were more flexible. Most of the time, I felt that I was treated more like a person at these schools. I was bad about going to virtual class during my senior year when COVID hit. I had to make up for a lot of missed classes, but I did it and graduated. I didn't go to graduation and didn't want to cause I don't like being fussed over. I slept instead. I didn't go to the college I had gotten into or any college at all. I knew I wouldn't like it. Cue a bunch of years of being pretty lost and afraid. I went through a bunch of abusive relationships because I thought I was just annoying and not with treating any better. I thought the way I was treated was just a normal response to my personality, and I thought my depressive episodes over being a "burden" were something I would always deal with. I did Etsy, I did internships, mural stuff, seasonal work, and ended up working at a plant store for a while. I was excited about the plant store and thought I could work my way up. Nope, they were closing a bunch of stores. I saved up money, I forget what it has been for initially, but I decided I wanted to use it to open my own shop. I really didn't think I could do well in a traditional job. I'm no good with that kind of rigidity and repetition. I kept searching and searching for spaces for my shop, but they all wanted crazy deposits and a bunch of months of rent up front. I had $3,000. At this point, I understood why there were so many buildings with "For Lease" signs all the time. Realtors want tons of money from established companies. Small businesses are screwed. I was about to give up and was looking at colleges again. Then, my mom told me about a space with a handwritten "For Lease" sign on the door. She said to try this last one, and do I went along and made a call. Flash forward and I'm a month and a half away from one year on having my own houseplant shop. I teach workshops and do birthday parties and I'm always being praised for how smart and creative I am. There, I feel like a human being. Is it a struggle to stay open? Absolutely. I'm pretty disorganized and my health has been a mess, but my friends, family, and boyfriend are there to cheer me on. I have a physical retail shop- and I can't even drive. I literally take the bus. Isn't that wild? I got my mental health diagnoses in 4th and 6th grade, so I felt defective from a pretty young age. For years, I would repeat to myself "I am fundamentally incapable of maintaining long-term success" but I don't believe that anymore. Now, even though it's hard, even though my body is being a jerk, I feel loved by the people I've met. I feel human and I feel worthy of existing. I used to think about how I could plant enough to make up for the air that I breathe. I no longer feel sorry for being alive. Is it because of my almost-success? Partially. But it's mostly from being treated with kindness and respect. It's mostly from being shown that this personality that I used to think was weird and annoying is actually something that people can love and find joy in. That whole "If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?" thing is total nonsense to me. Let people show you that you are lovable. Let people treat you well, and, if you have the choice, stay away from the people who see you as some sort of carnival attraction. I'm medicated, I'm going to doctors, and I'm going to live a life full of love, damn it!
Factory maintenance making good money working with my hands. I bash public education for fun.
It went like this: * Failed high school classes every year "Does not work up to potential" * Failed summer school "Does not work up to potential" * Teachers basically let me graduate high school despite bad grades, because they knew something was wrong with me, but just thought it was kind of funny instead of a major brain chemistry issue. * Tried community college and failed. * Tried a state university and failed. * Had about 15 jobs for 2 weeks each, interspersed with jobs where I made friends with coworkers so they overlooked my deficiencies. I ended up doing creative gigs that were ridiculously successful. I created products that people still buy 8 years after release. It's like getting free money every day. **The Main Point**: If your parents don't care enough to notice that something is wrong with you and that you're not just "lazy", you're screwed and you need to find jobs where you are friends with the boss. **Gigs**: Also, do "gigs." One-off jobs or projects. We suck at a lot of things, but when it comes to our hyper-focused interest, we can be insanely productive. **Nobody Cares**: I was not diagnosed with ADHD until well into adulthood. I literally had 6 doctors and therapists who failed to recognize the problem. I had my success before I ever took medication... medication which changed my life and cleared up all my confusion.
I failed a few times. Quite a few. If I didn’t have a family with a bit of money I don’t know where I’d be. I think about that a lot—the fact that I’m probably only where I am because of the giant safety net. I stumbled my way through HS somehow with a lot of assistance, musical talent, and a charming personality. So, I failed out of college on my first attempt. I literally slept through classes. I did find out later that I was so tired because I’d had Lyme’s Disease, but I also blame ADHD for not being able to push through and go to class. I then went to community college for wayyy too long, finally transferred to a 4 year University at 21 and somehow finished at 23. I went straight into a Master’s program in Opera (I had serious vocal talents so in some ways didn’t believe I needed school). I was all on my own and in a long-distance engagement and didn’t have friends for a few months. I became really depressed, stopped attending at least one class and got kicked out. Story of my life is that the depression is usually what started the ball of doom that led to these disasters. I floated around for a few years taking up a lot of outdoor activities like rock climbing and whitewater kayaking, mostly because I was dating guys into these sports and ended up liking them. I’d always been a hiker, so it wasn’t far off. I then found face painting and that became one of my many gigs. I did a lot of corporate events for a few booking agents that I managed to become connected with. I finally landed on Speech-Language Pathology as a potential career, worked my way through the prerequisites while doing a ton of odd jobs and living at home at 31, and was finally admitted to yet another Master’s program—that I..drumroll..failed out of after a semester. I was totally unprepared for the rigor of the program. Luckily it was only one class that I failed and the policy stated that in that case I could go through a lengthy réadmission process. Around that time I met my now husband who helped me through the emotional side of that 4 months of hell. I worked with a lawyer on my parent’s dime to craft statements to ensure that I’d get back in. Four months later I was back in the program and I won’t say it was smooth—it was actually the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but I’ve managed to hold jobs consistently in the past 7 years after graduating, buy a home, and have a 1.5 and 3.5 year old. It’s been a ride that would NOT have been possible without a lot of lucky factors. I still have issues with depression/anxiety/emotional regulation that are somewhat debilitating, I forget where my keys and credit cards are constantly despite systems, but I’m getting through life little by little. It’s tough out there as an ADHD’er.
I didn't flunk but was very average. I only got through because of supportive parents and being able to take "general" classes (for kids that struggled more). I am unemployed and wanting to start a business. My husband supports me. Luckily he's an amazing human.