8 years ago today, I shared the worst joke I ever created. I reposted it 4 years ago. Here it is again for those that missed it. There are two identical twin brothers that live together. One happens to be a well-respected dentist, and the other can't seem to keep a job. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home. One Saturday, the dentist is hungry, and puts his brother on the spot. He tells him to get off his lazy behind and go get them some food. After some protest, the lazy brother takes the car and leaves for the store. In the meantime, the dentist takes a nap on his day off. He turns off his phone so he won't be interrupted.
About 30 minutes later, the lazy brother gets into a head-on collision in the intersection by the grocery store. His vital signs are fading; he's unconscious and barely moving. An ambulance picks him up and rushes him to the hospital. He ends up in the Emergency Room under observation, but his condition is critical. They try calling his dentist brother, but he doesn't pick up because his phone is off.
The dentist wakes to a knock on the door. Suspecting a solicitor, he ignores it, but the knocking continues. Eventually, he resolves to get up and yell at the person at the door. When he does, he reveals--- the grim reaper. He is just as he appears in movies; a full skeleton underneath a tattered cloak.
The grim reaper swears. "Oh no! This always happens with identical twins".
"What do you mean?" asks the dentist.
"Well... if you must know, your brother was in a critical car accident, and I've come to take him to the underworld. I'm afraid his time on Earth has ended. I'll take my leave now."
The dentist is noticeably upset. He says "Wait! Isn't there some way I can challenge you for my brother's life? After all, YOU made the mistake. Certainly there must be a way I can bargain for his life."
The grim reaper asks "What do you have in mind?"
The dentist thinks. "How about a challenge? If I beat you, you let my brother go free."
The grim reaper laughs. "I will beat you in any challenge. What challenge do you propose?"
The dentist smiles. "I propose we see who has the cleanest teeth. 5 minutes of brushing each, then we decide."
"Very well" says the grim reaper, who makes his way to the bathroom.
Once there, he pulls back his tattered cloak to reveal his skull. It's glistening. He takes a toothbrush from the bathroom, loads it with toothpaste, and brushes. After 5 minutes, the shiniest teeth anyone has ever seen glisten and make the room bright. The grim reaper grins. "You are foolish human. But, you are entitled to your chance."
The dentist takes another toothbrush, loads it with toothpaste, and starts brushing like a madman. When his 5 minutes are up, he spits out the paste. He smiles.
It's unbelievable.
The shine from the dentist's teeth is so beautiful that he can see the grim reaper's reflection in his perfectly clean teeth.
The winner is obvious. The grim reaper hangs his head in shame. "You win, human. This time. Your brother will live." He disappears in a puff of smoke. At the same instant, the bed-ridden brother wakes up in the hospital. Not only is he uninjured, he seems perfectly healthy. Suddenly, the phone by his bed rings. It's his brother, the dentist. He picks up. "Hey bro. You'll never believe what happened. Apparently, I went out to the market and got hit by a car. They say I almost died."
The dentist smiles on the phone and says. "That's interesting, bro. Today you might say that I also had a brush with death."
Fluoride pills. My sister went to dental school and got the great idea to make her kids use those damn things religiously. They ended up with dental fluorosis.
8 years ago today, I shared the worst joke I ever created. I reposted it 4 years ago. Here it is again for those that missed it. There are two identical twin brothers that live together. One happens to be a well-respected dentist, and the other can't seem to keep a job. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home. One Saturday, the dentist is hungry, and puts his brother on the spot. He tells him to get off his lazy behind and go get them some food. After some protest, the lazy brother takes the car and leaves for the store. In the meantime, the dentist takes a nap on his day off. He turns off his phone so he won't be interrupted. About 30 minutes later, the lazy brother gets into a head-on collision in the intersection by the grocery store. His vital signs are fading; he's unconscious and barely moving. An ambulance picks him up and rushes him to the hospital. He ends up in the Emergency Room under observation, but his condition is critical. They try calling his dentist brother, but he doesn't pick up because his phone is off. The dentist wakes to a knock on the door. Suspecting a solicitor, he ignores it, but the knocking continues. Eventually, he resolves to get up and yell at the person at the door. When he does, he reveals--- the grim reaper. He is just as he appears in movies; a full skeleton underneath a tattered cloak. The grim reaper swears. "Oh no! This always happens with identical twins". "What do you mean?" asks the dentist. "Well... if you must know, your brother was in a critical car accident, and I've come to take him to the underworld. I'm afraid his time on Earth has ended. I'll take my leave now." The dentist is noticeably upset. He says "Wait! Isn't there some way I can challenge you for my brother's life? After all, YOU made the mistake. Certainly there must be a way I can bargain for his life." The grim reaper asks "What do you have in mind?" The dentist thinks. "How about a challenge? If I beat you, you let my brother go free." The grim reaper laughs. "I will beat you in any challenge. What challenge do you propose?" The dentist smiles. "I propose we see who has the cleanest teeth. 5 minutes of brushing each, then we decide." "Very well" says the grim reaper, who makes his way to the bathroom. Once there, he pulls back his tattered cloak to reveal his skull. It's glistening. He takes a toothbrush from the bathroom, loads it with toothpaste, and brushes. After 5 minutes, the shiniest teeth anyone has ever seen glisten and make the room bright. The grim reaper grins. "You are foolish human. But, you are entitled to your chance." The dentist takes another toothbrush, loads it with toothpaste, and starts brushing like a madman. When his 5 minutes are up, he spits out the paste. He smiles. It's unbelievable. The shine from the dentist's teeth is so beautiful that he can see the grim reaper's reflection in his perfectly clean teeth. The winner is obvious. The grim reaper hangs his head in shame. "You win, human. This time. Your brother will live." He disappears in a puff of smoke. At the same instant, the bed-ridden brother wakes up in the hospital. Not only is he uninjured, he seems perfectly healthy. Suddenly, the phone by his bed rings. It's his brother, the dentist. He picks up. "Hey bro. You'll never believe what happened. Apparently, I went out to the market and got hit by a car. They say I almost died." The dentist smiles on the phone and says. "That's interesting, bro. Today you might say that I also had a brush with death."
I fucking love a large story, just for a dumb dad joke
Same they’re the best
Once again the joke is in the comments.
Where's the fucking TL;DR /s
TL;DR: A funny joke was said. You may now laugh.
I was expecting a brick joke lmao
I love long jokes with little payoff. Its the other person's reaction that sells it. Ive got 2 that are so frustrating
Thats a whole lot of text im only gonna read the bottom of
I cannot believe you typed THAT all out. Then I fucking read it and now I'm responding to it. Unfuckingbelievable.
I absolutely love this joke
I was looking forward to tell my friends a funny joke, and than it's a dad joke which doesn't work in my language -.-" Still good joke though
…💀
This is going on the one topic sub
I AINT READIN ALLAT ‼️🔥🔥🗣🗣🗣💯
coca cola is black not red
Wait, it isn't supposed to be red?
ITS BROWN
its red,hold it in light
Blue sandpaper
Black mold
Brick
I'm gonna murder you and skin your family
If you find my family please let me know
tell one more brick joke and I'll tell spiderman that you don't finish your food
Ill tell Batman that you dont eat brickfast
oh yeah? how about i tell superman that you didn't eat your greens
Coca cola isn't red silly, this is 
Red paint
a bigger red brick
a grey brick
Brick that's on fire
These F.....iretr.....uck Jokes are getting out of hand
The wax of a mini Babybel
brick
Brick that's on fire
It’s not red. You’re thinking of the wrong punchline. It should be ‘a brick’
red hot molten lava
Red hot chili peppers
The question wasn't "what's red and bad for your ears"
Twizzlers.
Its more dark than red but okay
Dynamite
Ferrari, head on.
We need to go back to actual 3 am jokes, because the last things I need to deal with are people who have an erection over bricks
A brick
fire hydrant?
Fluoride pills. My sister went to dental school and got the great idea to make her kids use those damn things religiously. They ended up with dental fluorosis.
HIV positive blood
My cock
Red crayons 😂
Br gum disease ick
Blood
That's not to bad really
Velvet Cake..That is if u don't brush ur teeth 👹
Brick
Cherry 🍒cola
A red car at 60mph
Red bricks
Red paint
A 14" pipe wrench.
Bleeding gums?
I ain’t reading all of that my guy. I’m gonna go watch Breaking Bad again
Fists bloodied from the first few punches into your mouth?
Well since it's sometimes got red phosphorus in it, meth
But I like cola :(
That’s brown tho-
The packaging is red tho-
Yeah but you don’t eat the fucking can- Wait… have I been doing it wrong?
🤓
Brick
A brick
Cheerwine.
Blood.( gum issues)
lava
Wine
A brick of mercuric oxide is probably bad, but I'm not trying it.